Aside from a few nicks, scrapes, and bruises, I was determined to be mostly alright. Which was good- after all, I still had to mete out these dogs' punishment for rebellion. See, there’s a very specific punishment for rebellion in Fertilia; in fact, the King told me this info- which I may just use to my advantage.

The military, utterly routed, broken, and humiliated, were pinned down by my army in the grass field before me, many having their heads held up by my men; their clean, bright yellow uniforms contrasting heavily with my gray armor and dirty yellow cape. Since most of their civilian populace was still trapped underground, the message would have to be passed to them later… didn’t mean I couldn’t give these fucks their punishment, though. They looked bad- many of them were missing limbs and covered in chemical burns or blinded from the chlorine and nearly every one of them wheezed pathetically through cloth gags. There were about 400 of them in total, and each one had a griffon on its back and its hands tied.

The alpha who Adrian beat the shit out of stood among the crowd too, and Bruce and his men were pre-emptively sent to the next location, Fennario, where these soldiers would soon be joining them. Most likely, they’ll be preparing to hold the line and mount a defense, which is what we were hoping for.

They’d be in for a shock.

“So, this is how it’s gonna be? We gave you a chance to surrender, and you chose to fight.” I yelled towards the crowd, a scowl on my face. “In my eyes, that is treason.” I yelled out, giving them a few seconds to think my words over.

“According to the treaty which your alpha signed-” The crowd turned to glare at the poor bastard. “Any previous actions against your nation, being Fertilia, and by extension, your Godmother… which is me, you will all be punished to the full extent allowed by The King.” I explained, and the crowd glanced around nervously.

“Not only have your actions caused unneeded pain and bloodshed, you have murdered four of our own, hitherto harmed many others, myself included, and permanently disfigured one of my best friends. That, I do not forgive.” I gesticulated precisely to get my point across, keeping my head held high and my face a cold, stern glare.

I walked closer to the crowd, to the dog in the very front left. The soldier on his back saluted me.

“Godmother.” The soldier said, and I blinked… then smirked. I didn’t intend for my own soldiers to call me that… but I wasn’t complaining.

“At ease.” I said, and nodded to the rest of my men. They got the hint. I looked at the soldier and handed him my dagger, saying, “Gouge both of his eyes, then assist him in grabbing onto the shoulders of the next one.” He looked at me blankly for a few seconds, before nodding and grabbing the dagger.

The dog squirmed and begged for mercy which he would never receive. The soldier effortlessly used the dagger to stab and pry the eyes out, the dog howling in pain as blood leaked from its sockets. The soldier swallowed and nodded.

“You may return to camp and rest. You’re doing great work, soldier.” I patted him on the shoulder and he kept that stern look. I think he might have been putting on a brave face.

The next soldier in line looked mortified. “You have your orders, soldier.” I said sternly, holding out the dagger. “You’ve made it this far, and this is hardly the worst thing we’ve done. And remember- the alternative is that we can just go home and let everything keep falling apart.” I said, and the soldier nodded shakily. She did the deed and her breath hitched in her throat.

This process went on until I reached the 50th dog. I held out the dagger and said, “This time, I only want you to gouge out a single eye.” The soldier cocked an eyebrow and nodded slowly, gouging out one eye. I smirked, looking at the conga line I’ve created.

About 50 dogs stood front to back, each one grabbing another's shoulders for dear life and howling in pain where they stood. Blood ran down their cheeks and I… I couldn’t help but love the sight, almost wanting to laugh at it.

What… I just don’t get it! Why did the Goldcairn massacre affect me so, yet this atrocity brings me laughter? Is it because this was a routed army and not a civilian populace? Is it because deep down, I know these ones would kill me if given the chance? Am I feeling righteous anger for what happened to Adrian? Have I finally gone mad!?

I don’t know… Maybe I should at least talk to a shrink once this is done.

Anyways, at the end we had eight of the most macabre, most miserable looking conga lines the world has ever seen. I addressed the line of half blind dogs.

“The goal is simple. Each of you are to lead the rest of your men to Fennario, where we will catch up within a week.” I produced a piece of white cloth and a letter. “This letter contains simple instructions on what to do to prepare for our visit. I hope your leaders can see reason.” The random dog I handed it to nodded rapidly.

“Now fuck off.” I said to them, and slowly while in much pain, they did just that. Another day, another tally on my list of war crimes.

Now, I had to address my men. I approached Ulysses in his tent. “Have the men gather somewhere. It’s time for a speech.” He nodded and I left wordlessly. It was getting late in the evening, so I decided to fly up and find a cloud to recollect my thoughts. My side was still sore from where I took that blow, so I laid on my other side for about 20 minutes, until the crowd seemed to be ready.

I was gonna have a sip for courage before I went down, but I said fuck it. I glided down from the cloud and landed in front of my men, who all greeted me with a mass salute.

“At ease!” I yelled out, greeting them with a grin. “First, I would like to express my gratitude to every brave griffon who fought and bled for your country. I would also like to remind you that not only are you doing this for your country- you’re doing it for your families at home. You’re doing it for the unborn children of the nation. You’re doing it… for those we’ve lost.” My voice softened considerably on that somber note.

“That said, it has come to my attention that some of you have begun to question the validity of such a conquest. Some of you are experiencing regret for what we’ve done so far. But I assure you- what we are doing is both necessary and pragmatic.” I said, and surveyed the crowd. Some of them seemed unsure, muttering amongst themselves.

“Evidently, some of you need a reminder of why we’re doing what we’re doing.” I said, making sure that the disappointment in my voice was quite apparent. “I’m gonna tell you all a story. A personal story; my story. Listen to my story, my tale of why I fight, then consider your own lives.” I said simply, and gave them a few moments to absorb my words.

“Growing up in Fertilia, I lived a happy life. I lived with my Mamma, whom I still love very much. We lived decently- Mamma had a job and I got good grades in school.” I could tell these guys whatever I wanted- after all, who was gonna deny these claims? “I was eight years old when everything ground to a halt because of these beasts. My world completely fell apart after that.” I noticed the sad looks some people in the crowd had- this must be working.

“We were forced to move out of the cottage I was born in to live in the slums. We had no hot water. We ate by candlelight to save money. Mamma worked two jobs so I made sure to keep the house clean, and cooked dinner for her. It wasn’t ideal, but we were making it.” I elaborated, and the crowd hung on to my every word.

“Then when Mamma lost one job and could only work half as many hours at the other, things really got difficult. I was forced to leave school and do whatever I could to bring home money. I worked whatever odd jobs I could. I was forced to steal. I was forced to lie. I… am not proud of this time in my life, though I recognize it as instrumental for forging me into the woman I am today.”

Solidarity- many of these people went through similar things as I did. We all knew what it was like to lose it all. Murmurs erupted from the crowd.

“When I was forced to move to Equestria, I thought my life was over. But then- I found my fortune.” The crowd swelled, “I built weapons. I opened factories. I helped create a system to create fertilizers that have increased crop output tenfold.” My grin threatened to split my face and the crowd started cheering.

“THE KING HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!” I crossed my arms and held my head high, the crowd yelling in shock, “ALL THIS HAS BEEN FINANCED BY ME! THAT WEAK OLD FOOL COULD NO MORE PLAN AN INVASION THAN HE COULD RUN A COUNTRY!” loud cheers of agreement rang out from the crowd. People were tired of the old rule.

I gave them a few seconds to let that info sink in. All this money, all this effort… from one griffon who has nothing to do with the royal family. After a few seconds, the crowd settled- and a general sense of what now set in.

“I ask not that you worship me, I ask that you follow me. Follow me- into a new golden age of science, learning, and culture never before seen by the world! FOR PROSPERITY!” I yelled out, pumping my fist in the air.

“PROSPERITY!” The crowd yelled back, pumping their fists in the air in a similar manner. Then the crowd started moving towards me, yelling Godmother! I felt like a rockstar, literally being picked up by the crowd!

“ALRIGHT BOYS, LISTEN UP!” After spending a minute crowd surfing, I was set down and a circle was cleared around me. “Tomorrow morning, we’re finally gonna be heading to the city of Bristle to take a load off. Relax, drink, read letters and write home, whatever.” I yelled, and that single sentence was like music to their ears, and I’m sure the town of Bristle probably heard the cheering, even though we’re still a day out.

It’s been a fuckin’ minute since I’ve even thought of Bristle. Apparently it’s grown a bit since the agriculture boom.

Here’s hoping that no-one remembers my face there.

---

Let me tell you- after all that excitement, we were all pretty tired when we turned in that night. Since we were down a man, I had to sleep alone. You’d think that’d be a good thing, and my teammates would agree, with many of them proclaiming their jealousy.

I dunno. I’ve just never liked sleeping alone. At least in Ponyville, Mamma was right next door; here, it’s just me, the warm glow of a fire in front of me, and my tent. Maybe it’s a paranoia thing? Either way, times like this really make me appreciate my mother.

This time, approaching Bristle came with much more fanfare. The town had gotten noticeably larger in my absence, and thank fuck they had time to prepare for our arrival. Pubs, winehouses, and alehouses all had tables set up and spilled out onto the streets for all the thirsty soldiers who would be spending the day drinking away their troubles.

Since I’m ballsy and I smoke my stogies wherever I want, I decided to hunt down that pub where Mamma and I last made our grand exit. I got to setting up my tent right quick and heading to the bar.

What? It was late evening, it’s socially acceptable to get drunk now!

The inside of the pub hardly changed, aside from some decorations and other miscellaneous stuff- like a novelty glass case with an eyepatch behind it. In case someone loses an eye! It said on the front. As soon as I walked through the batwing doors, the people started cheering! Fertilians mainly, so there was a lot of Ayy, there she is! And That’s tha’ Godmotha’!

I joined the rest of the xanthous team at a table in the middle, where there was already whiskey on the rocks waiting for me- I took a deep swig and sighed.

I looked around at the crowd and a wide grin spread across my face. I called over the owner and whispered something in his ear, and he nodded with a smirk.

“DRINKS ARE ON ME TONIGHT, BOYS!” I yelled, and the thunderous roar threatened to shatter windows all across town. I just told the barman to send the bill to my wife.

The shots started pouring and the party really started.

“Ay, Leona!” I heard someone yell in the crowd, “How was livin’ in Equestria?” I was pretty drunk at this point, so rather than trying to figure out who asked, I just yelled out the answer.

“Fuckin sucked! There wasn’t no butcher in that town, you couldn’t even get no fuckin’ gabagool!” I yelled out, and the gasps of shock damn near brought silence to that pub.

“No gabagool!” Someone yelled, completely outraged that a vegan society wouldn’t have the ability, in a small town, to make fuckin’ capocollo. “Fuckin’ nerve a those ponies!”

I agreed wholeheartedly.

“What in the world is gabagool?” I just huffed in indignation, along with many of the other Fertilians. I just threw my arms out and yelled,

“Boy, are you tryin’ ta start a friggin riot!? Don’t know what gabagool is, fuck outta heah!” I don’t even know who I was talking to, I was just yelling into the crowd.

“Is that any way to greet a friend?” I blinked twice, then finally decided to look at my surroundings.

“ADRIAN!?” That fuck! “HOW YA DOIN, PAL!?” I pulled my friend in for a hug then patted the chair next to me.

“I must say, I’ve been better.” He said flatly, taking his seat and grabbing one of the many shots which had been sitting on the table. He looked the part- the left side of his face was featherless and he had a ridiculous looking glass eye.

“That glass eye looks like shit.” I said, handing him a cigarette and offering up a light. “You oughta replace it with an eyepatch.” I lit up a cigarette for myself and took a shot, and Adrian huffed.

“I wish I could. King says he doesn’t want people to think he’s so desperate as to send a…” He snorted in annoyance and did air quotes, “Half blind son of a noble.” He gritted his beak and I got up to grab something.

I went to that novelty display case with the eyepatch and used the butt of my pistol to break the glass.

“Fuck the king.” I said to Adrian, “Get rid of that ridiculous thing and put this on.” He looked at me in confusion, before his frown slowly turned to a grin. He pulled the fake eye out and put the patch on.

“LET’S GIVE IT UP FOR DIS CRAZY SONUVABITCH!” I yelled out, and everyone raised glasses in the air. “SAVIN’ THA FUCKIN DAY, HE DID!”

“No no, I wouldn’t go that far.” He was being modest and I was having none of it.

“Knock that off. People’re gonna be talking about the Dead Man for a long time to come now.” He mouthed out the nickname I gave him, and apparently the people caught on, cheering DEAD MAN!

He finally shrugged with a wide grin, downing down a pint in one go.

It was gonna be a good night.

---

Apparently, it’d be a good morning, too. Despite the hangover, despite the nightmares I had, and despite the fact that I had to piss like a racehorse, I saw another face that I’d dearly missed. I looked at Diamond Tiara, standing over me in my tent and regarded her with a warm smile. I had lots of questions and my brain was running at the speed of a turtle OD’ing on heroin.

So many questions like What are you doing here? What time is it? Did you know you’re beautiful?

“Why are you dressed like a gay nazi?” was what I asked her. That’s when I noticed something was off. She had a stern look on her face and her arms were crossed. Her outfit was somewhat new as well- bright pink with pinstripes, but with a few noticeable new accouterments; namely, the tiara shaped pin on her lapel, and um…

So, griffons don’t normally wear clothes. Unless you’re rich or powerful, you’re not gonna wear fashionable clothes on the regular. Not to mention, if you wanted to show support for our “party” through clothing, it would cost real money to make yourself, say, a coat or something.

So naturally, the most cost effective way for your average griffon to show their support is… an armband. It was all black, with a white circle and the yellow sign in the center. Not… not the worst thing I’ve ever done, but it’ll earn me no favors at The Hague.

“Why was I sent a seven thousand bit bar tab?” She pulled out the paper and I realized that I was a fucking moron.

Great job, Leona. Send the bar bill to your wife who doesn’t know you’re back on the booze.

“Baby, I can explain.” I said, rubbing my temple. She looked at me in stern silence and ugh… I just sighed.

“Listen, I’m not gonna try and make up excuses. I relapsed and I’m sorry.” She huffed, turning her head when I grabbed her shoulder. “But I mean, it’s not like I’m drinking 24/7 again. I don’t even have access to booze most days.” I explained, and her shoulders softened a little.

“Come oooon! It's like back in school when we only had time to get drunk on weekends.” I explained to her, and she snorted with a smirk. “Honey, I’ve got it under control. Believe me.” Finally, she turned to look at me with a smile and I pulled her in for a kiss.

“Oh, I can’t stay mad at you, you fuck!” She groaned at me, and I laughed.

“Glad to hear it.” I said, patting her on the back. I pulled out of the hug a bit more forcefully than I meant to. “Now move. I’m boutta piss myself here.” I whinged, rushing to the latrine. Like most days when I spent the night before drinking heavily, it was about midday.

A few moments later, I returned to my tent with a grin and a pep in my step. I greeted my wife with a peck on the cheek and sat next to her, wrapping a wing around her back.

“Better?” She asked me, and I nodded. In front of her was a bag full of… things! “Lemme show you what I’ve been working on.”

Apparently, I married a propaganda maestro. First, she started simple- the I’m Doing My Part! Campaign was essential for rallying the national spirit. Not only were there posters of me saluting, there were also depictions of men with missing limbs working in a factory alongside nobles, and that sort of stuff. All with the single message of togetherness, or unity.

There was also the widely successful Do It For Them! Campaign, which heavily featured imagery of children in school, or playing in a green park, all while soldiers marched on in the background.

Something interesting I noticed is that all the posters had a sort of badge at the bottom of the yellow sign- and with a subtext, paid for by the Grimfeather Outfit. And of course- there was the more generic PROSPERITY! Posters where the main focus was pumping a fist in the air.

“Before we get into whatever else the… Grimfeather Outfit is up to… there’s a special project I want you to take on, if you don’t mind.” I said, and she pulled out a pen and a notepad.

“So, the diamond dogs live in sheer, utter poverty. They literally have fuck all, aside from a few. I’m not sure why and quite frankly, I don’t care.” she nodded, jotting down what I said. “I want you to get some film recordings and use your magic to make us look like the saviors- delivering the poor beasts from poverty! Or… something like that.”

She tapped her chin with a hoof a few times, apparently absorbed in thought. She then gasped and began to rapidly jot down notes. Once she finished writing, she dropped the pen out of her mouth and said-

“I’ll do you one better.” she set the notepad to the side and with a wide grin, said to me- “So imagine. These diamond dogs live in poverty and have lived in poverty for who knows how long. What if we were to imply to the people that’s what they want for us!” I thought about it for a second and blinked.

“Think about it. First we describe the apparently abhorrent conditions these dogs live in. Then there’s the reveal that they want us to live like them too! You know- in dark, underground caves where there’s no light, no food, and-”

“I get it. Next point.” I said, a bit more stern than I wanted to. My wife was taken aback and I muttered out, “Sorry, honey.” She just shrugged and shook her head.

“Anyways, I’m talking like paid actors and other imagery to invoke the feeling that they were getting ready for war themselves etcetera etcetera. It’s obviously a very work in progress, but whatchu think so far?” I just scratched my chin.

“Yeah… Hmmm, yeah! At the very least, it’ll justify most of the atrocities we’ve committed, at least in the eyes of the people. Good work, honey.” I said to her, and she beamed at me.

“Not only that, but I can also use this film to paint the king as a diamond dog sympathizer!” She said excitedly.

“Be careful, though. The last thing I want to have to deal with is you getting hit with a treason sentence.” She just snorted.

“Don’t worry. I’m going through so many third parties that I can make it seem like a rumor started in some small-time salon.” I just smiled at her. I was still a little nervous- after all, I knew damn well the punishment for treason… but on the other hand, I trusted my wife.

“So anyways, that’s phase one. I’ll start phase 2 once this film is done.” she said, before muttering “I think I have enough time…” she then shrugged. “So… spa reservations?”

“God, yes.” was my immediate response. I could really use a happy ending right now. She giggled and held out her arm.

“Shall we, my darling?” And I just nodded. She then gasped- “BUT FIRST!” There was a suitcase in the corner, which I assumed was full of her stuff. She popped it open for me and revealed-

“Oh shit!” I pulled my favorite coat and capelet out, although it had slight modifications- the left arm had The Yellow Sign embroidered in a white circle on the left sleeve and the hat had a pin of my wifes tiara. “Been a minute since I wore this.”

Lemme tell ya’s, my wife and I? Looked fuckin snazzy! We drew eyes wherever we went, and it wasn’t just because my face had been plastered all over the kingdom. Today was a nice day- we went to the spa together, sat down for coffee at a local cafe, we even went to the bar together!

We even went for a quickie in the bathroom stall when we were both fucked up.

That night at the train station was… painful. God, it was like 10 PM and I was fuckin wasted. My clothes were even packed back into the suitcase, since I wouldn’t really be able to bring it with me.

“Do ya haveta’ go?” I whined to her on the bench we were on, hugging her like she was gonna fall off the planet. She just sighed at me, her blushy face just making my heart melt.

“Yes, honey. I got work to do. And so do you!” She said, kissing me on the cheek. The train blew its whistle, signaling that it was time to board. I just whined out in response.

“Nooooo…” I said, sniffling slightly.

“Darling, please. We’ll be together soon, you know!” She gave me one more kiss on the cheek before yelling back, “Be good! And no more booze, you’ve had enough tonight!”

“Ah won’t!” I yelled back to her with a wide grin. The door shut and I sighed, lowering my head.

I made my way back to the pub and sat in front of my half-drank glass of whiskey. I downed it in one go and took several deep breaths.

I was about to go home and turn in for the night… but then I thought to myself- What’s one more drink?

Well, we all know how that goes.

Lights out.

I think it's worth mentioning that I don't endorse any of Leona's actions.

I have a discord server for this fic out now!! It'd be real cool if u joined :333

Thank you for reading! As always, likes and comments are greatly appreciated :3