Ch.8

[Tirdas, 13th of Sun’s Height, 4E: 221]

“You are. Bar none. The most disaster-prone companion I have ever involved myself with.” Neethsi grumbled moments after I woke up on his boat, flying through the air to wherever. Mellow was here too, thank gosh. He didn’t even have a bruise from being clotheslined in the snoz.

“It’s not like I’m trying.” I sighed as I rubbed my chest while I thought of ways to expend magicka quickly besides spamming Healing or something. One being making a weapon that actively takes from my pool. Maybe something metal with lighting runes. Or. “Can we make a trip up to south Eastmarch in Skyrim so I can use the Atronach stone to stop me from exploding?”

“We put your hand on the Atronach Stone in Blackrose before we left and it worked. You’re good for a week and we’ll be in Lilmoth by tomorrow according to Neethsi. There’s copies of the stones in each major city due to their convenience. The Steed Stone is particularly popular.” Mellow smiled and I snorted in amusement at him appreciating people enjoying the stone at least tangentially related to his people.

“That said, no. If we don’t have pressing issues after our trip to Lilmoth, which I doubt, I’ll take you on an express trip to Skyrim.” Neethsi added and I had to wonder what express was if his little skiff wasn’t the fastest mode of transportation he had.

“Oh. Well in that case, since you spend most of the time just sitting and reading while we’re flying on course, could you maybe teach me things?” I’d rather get to work on making a gun asap, but there isn’t much room up here.

“Sure, but this space is fairly cramped. Keep an eye on the console to make sure none of the levers move, Mellow. They’re stiff and take strength to move, but with these contraptions you have to be careful.” Neethsi said while he fetched a full-looking large coinpurse from his pack.

“Sure thing, but what are you going to be doing?” Mellow questioned as Neethsi put the bag between my satchel and Mellow’s pack before he opened the drawstrings. He took my hand and I squealed when an invisible force pulled us into the bag’s mouth! I screamed at the sensation of free-fall before landing atop Neethsi on a massive plush bed.

“Oof! You could’ve warned me first!” I huffed angrily and slapped his chest, which elicited a slight twitch of his face that made me think he almost smiled in that eye-crinkle way argonians do.

“Seeing people’s reactions to the Haven Bag are always amusing.” Neethsi commented and I knew it! He did almost smile!

“Hmph!” I pouted, before I realized I was straddling his pelvis and we were on a bed. I’m straddling a total hottie and we’re on a bed. On a bed. Straddling. Hottie.

“Uh-oh.” Neethsi waved his hands and I levitated away from him before my desire to rip his pants off and get my pleasure could overwhelm my stunned state. “Sorry about that. I should have a potion to help with that somewhere in here…” Neethsi climbed off of the massive bed that could’ve fit three of him on it and rooted around some cabinets next to an alchemy table nearby.

“Why didn’t you think of this earlier?” I huffed in frustration before I flashed blue and the magic holding me in the air failed, dropping me a couple feet back onto the bed to bounce a bit. That must’ve been my new power at work. “Just be glad I don’t have a dick anymore.”

“I’ve done the dirty with Vivec, wouldn’t be new to me.” Neethsi idly replied and I felt even more aroused thinking of two hot hunks going at each other. GRR! Not helping! “Ah! Here it is. Menstruation Balm. Rub it on your lower stomach or even inside your vaginal area and it’ll ease cramps and other hormonal urges spurred by the womb.”

“Great, give it.” I grumbled, snatching the jar from him and opening it to get some of the green paste on my fingers, then I lifted my tunic to rub my tummy and upper pussy area, sighing as instant relief eased the tensions in my body. “That is such a relief. I really wish you gave me this the day before yesterday.”

“I haven’t had such a rampantly needy female companion in ages. Pardon me if I’m used to distancing myself from intimacy.” Neethsi deadpanned sarcastically before he gestured around the Haven Bag. it was a rather cramped space, seeming to be no bigger than the central living space of a fairly modest middle-class home. In this space was squeezed his space-dominating bed, a small alchemy table, a small kitchenette, a small forge with a small smelter and a small enchanting table. All were either on cabinets or in the case of the latter two, on the floor.

There were also storage chests filling the rest of the ‘wall’ space of the magic canvas container along with, ew, a rather fancy-looking dwarven metal toilet. I hope it’s self-composting like the wooden one Mellow had at his clinic. “Well, maybe some intimacy would help you loosen up.” I snarked after I examined his portable living space. Gotta say, since it has the same square footage of a good sized studio apartment, it’s really nifty that it’s kinda like a genie lamp.

“While I do enjoy the pleasures of the flesh as much, if not more than the next argonian, I would rather abstain for now.” Neethsi crossed his arms and leered at me. “Besides, considering you have Hircine’s blood, I might go a bit too far and hurt you. Perhaps later when we’ve been together longer.”

“Ah, okay.” I said with my face feeling warm, but I know I can’t blush. “So can I get some training in magic and archery?”

“Archery I can train you to be a Journeyman or an Adept as laymen call the level of competence these days. As for magic, what schools? I have extensive experience in all schools of magic, even the ones society has deemed either irrelevant or amoral, but know that for most subjects outside of Alteration or Mysticism, I’m only an Adept.” Neethsi informed me, likely so I know that if I meet his standards in those areas he isn’t a Master, that I’d have to seek out a Master of that craft or art to grow further.

“Uh, hm, maybe some Destruction, Alteration and Mysticism?” I asked and he looked so serious I thought his face might suddenly turn to stone.

“Alteration and Mysticism, are you sure? Absolutely certain you wish to delve into the fabric of reality and consciousness?” Neethsi asked with grave warning in his tone. “If you seek Mysticism for its abilities similar to Illusion, then I’d advise you to choose the School of Ignorance and remain happy with simply tricking people’s minds rather than manipulating them.”

“I don’t know much about most magic at all.” I sighed as I rubbed my snout nervously.

“Then in that case, I highly advise you to take Destruction, Restoration and Illusion. Those three schools are arguably the ‘safest’ in that they won’t potentially erase your very existence from a simple thought.” Neethsi suggested and I felt slight disappointment that he felt I couldn’t handle the ‘more dangerous’ schools.

“Alright.” I said with a shrug.

“Let’s begin. Destruction simply requires focus and intent, no fancy runes or complicated formulae unless you get into the fields of it’s alternate applications like the genius madman who realized Destruction could be used to annihilate plagues.” Neethsi opened up his lecture and he already had my full attention with that tidbit I didn’t know.

“Oh, that sounds cool.” I commented in earnest intrigue.

📜

By the time we left the Haven Bag, I’d learned more about Destruction magic than I’d ever thought was possible. Who in today’s age actually understood that Destruction wasn’t just hurling balls of fire or bolts of lightning, but imposing your will on reality for it to simply cease to be in some form? Either way, it was almost sundown and there was still no sight of Lilmoth, which was a bit odd, considering the map suggested Soulrest and Lilmoth were similar distances from Blackrose.

“Are we headed the right way? I haven’t touched anything, but shouldn’t we have arrived in Lilmoth by now?” Mellow questioned worriedly and I looked around at the swamps below, then noticed the approaching body of water. Shouldn’t that be Oliis Bay? Where is Lilmoth?

“Yes, we have. Oh. Oh~. Right. You wouldn’t know because it isn’t common knowledge. You remember that Lilmoth was destroyed during the Umbriel Crisis in 4E 48, yes?” Neethsi questioned and Mellow shook his head in surprise while I nodded grimly. “Well, ever since then, the city has been rebuilt and expanded, but it has protections from flying entities. A flimsy one really, but as you can witness: Illusion can be quite useful.” Neethsi gestured down at the continuous swamp and I peered into it, only now noticing something off.

“Wait...isn’t that just a repeating canopy pattern from the surrounding trees?” I asked as I looked back the way we came. Normally that’d be impossible to tell, but the canopy of Black Marsh was a unique entity, not just composed of leaves, but mushrooms and flowery stalks as well. The layout below us was exactly the same as the swamp behind us.

“Yes! I’m glad my short introduction to Illusion managed to enlighten you so much already. We’ll have to set the skiff down in the bay and actually row my precious boat into harbor to see the city normally.” Neethsi informed us while he piloted us down towards the water. “Don’t worry about the Sea Drakes. They hate the taste of metal and they’re smart enough to see it on the hull to not try and drag it down.”

“Oh, good.” I said, having been worried about that from what I barely remember from ESO. We touched down on the water and suddenly the harbor and the port city beyond materialized, the lighthouse at the mouth of the bay that led to the Southern Sea also revealed itself. “How did they accomplish that?” I asked in bafflement.

“It’s a genius work of art involving magicka collection panels on the rooftops to gather Magnus’s energy during the day to power an illusion array engraved in the crenelations of the perimeter wall and the city hall as the focal point. They did a similar thing for the lighthouse with a Magelight enchantment. Lilmoth is an example of forward-thinking mages coming together to create something never before seen on Tamriel.” Neethsi proudly declared while he produced oars from his pack and sat in the center of the boat.

“Wait, you have solar panels?!” They may collect magicka instead of electricity, but holy shit!

“Hm, that is a rather more apt name than Magnus Magicka Collection Cells. I’ll bring it up with the local university.” Neethsi idly commented, as if he didn’t understand the implications! They discovered a means of easy and potent energy collection before they discovered man-portable firearms! I see powered Magelight lamps instead of oil lamps or torches! This place looks even more advanced than the Venetian-styled Soulrest!

“Ah...good to be back, even if it meant selling my clinic.” Mellow sighed in relief and shook his head. “I wonder why nobody told me about that overhead illusion hiding the city. I had several pegasus friends growing up, I wonder why they never mentioned it.”

I was about to comment when I felt a shiver run down my spine. As we neared a free space on a dock, I saw a pink blur rush through the street and onto the pier we were docking. “Welp, Pinkamena Pie is here.” I huffed in a great deal of exasperation mixed with sadness and a bit of joy. My Pinkie is gone, but I can’t dwell on it. I’ll miss her, but this is an opportunity to meet a new friend, not an echo of an old one.

“Pinkie? Oh! Hey! Pinkie!” Mellow shouted, surprising me since he was always a fairly quiet pony, but I guess she-. “W-wait-wait! I didn’t break my Pinkie Promise!” It was just now I noticed her mane and tail were straight and shiny rather than poofy and curly. The mare was...well, shockingly buff. She easily stood seven feet tall, had a G-cup bust that was fully covered in her brown tunic and white baker’s apron, as well as wearing shorts, which I felt may be considered scandalous by most people’s standards on Tamriel.

“I know buster, but you haven’t written in ages! Aunt Cup Cake has been worried sick!” Pinkie snarled at him and I felt a sinking pain in my chest. She looked like Limestone Pie more than Pinkie Pie with that sneer and stern glare to her eyes.

“Sorry. I didn’t anticipate being so busy all the time. I kept forgetting to write. Has it really been months since my last update?” Mellow asked with wilted ears and Pinkie pulled him into a hug, which smashed the shorter unicorn’s snout into her head-sized boobs, which muffled his yelp.

“Good to see you.” Pinkie grunted and patted his back before looking at us. “Now who in the name of Oblivion are these two?” Pinkie demanded and I was too terrified of seeing a Pinkie who wasn’t smiling looking at me with casual contempt to say anything, thankfully Neethsi finished tying the boat to the dock and gathered up our belongings after he cast a spell at the storage box and console that made them glow for a second.

“I am Neethsi Nagnaresh good baker. This is our mutual friend and walking danger-zone, Meen-Rei.” Neethsi gestured to me and I puffed up, my fear of a Limestone-Pinkie abated.

“I’m not a danger zone!” I barked before my scales began splitting apart and floating about my surface as my insides shined with magic. “Crap, crap!” I spammed Heal, only for Neethsi to snort and shake his head, causing me to feel embarrassed. Damn it. He told me I might get magicka flare-ups with strong emotions thanks to being attuned to Magnus from being stabbed by the Nail of Magnus. “Okay. Calm. I am calm.” I took deep breaths and my ironically atronach-like body quickly pieced back together.

“Wow, you should get looked at by Twilight. Like, right now. Come with me, we were having a girl’s night anyway.” Pinkie said before she grabbed my wrist and Mellow yelped when she tossed him over her other shoulder, forcefully leading us into the city. “You’d better come along if you want to stay with them, big guy.” Pinkie called back at Neethsi, who didn’t hesitate to follow the gruff and forceful mare that was clearly not like the Pinkie I remember from my world.

“Certainly ma’am.” Neethsi replied and kept in step, but she snorted and rolled her eyes.

“Ma’am is my mom. I’m Pinkamena Diane Pie. I don’t know you, you can call me Diane. Friends call me Pinkie, but only friends can call me Pinkie.” Pinkie, er, Diane’s words stung. It was so strange to hear her normally cheerful squeaky voice filled with an underlying growl this whole time and now I can’t even call her Pinkie? It hurt so much…

“Fair enough Diane. Just to check, you’re the daughter of Igneous Rock Pie and Cloudy Quartz?” Neethsi questioned, which made me look at him in curiosity.

“Yep, those are my parents alright. Why, you know them?” Pinkie questioned defensively.

“Yes. I helped remove the Parasprite infestation from their rock farm on the southern coast several years ago.” Wha-bwuh?! Parasprites came to Tamriel?! They must’ve hitched a ride on the boats! I’m surprised those things haven’t swept through Black Marsh...then again, Black Marsh is likely much more deadly than the Everfree even in this world’s version of Equestria.

“Oh! That was you? Thanks, if you didn’t keep them from eating our food stores, we would’ve starved. Call me Pinkie.” Diane smiled at him and I felt a glimmer of hope before she looked down at me with a sneer. “So do you know my family too or something?”

“Um...not in this reality…” I admitted weakly and she snorted.

“My Pinkie Sense tells me you’re telling the truth. Sorry if I’m not up to your expectations, but whatever Pinkie you knew, she isn’t me. Get to know me though and I’ll let you call me Pinkie too.” She then raised her left brow at me. “What, I’m a total enigmatic ditz in most realities? Pbbt, yeah, no. This world would’ve eaten her alive. I have it hard enough looking out for Marble and my friends, let alone everybody like I’m sensing other Pinkies try to.”

“You’d be surprised. I’d bet she’d be a plucky adventurer in this world if...y’know…” I didn’t want to dwell on my dead friends damn it…

“Oh. Sorry. Tell you what, girl’s night is girl’s night, you can join in and get to know us. After-.” She shrugged the shoulder she had Mellow slung over and he whined. “-I drop this goof on his mom’s doorstep. Auntie Cuppy has been so lonely without anyone else but Marble and I at the bakery.” Wait, Mellow is Cup Cake’s son?! What about Pumpkin and Pound Pie?! “They moved north to southern Morrowind to open their own bakery.” Huh? Their ages are so different here!

“Your innate use of Mysticism is astounding.” Neethsi observed and Diane smirked boastfully.

“I’m the strongest passive Mystic in Lilmoth! I don’t even need to use spells to know things to the point Twilight and other mages can’t figure out how I do it. I don’t know how I do it!” Diane cheerfully declared while jostling Mellow about, the unicorn grumbling about being manhandled.

“Wha?” I was confused. Beyond the norm when it comes to Pinkie anyway. Diane seemed to operate similarly, but on a different wavelength and a more reasonable task list than Pinkie always held herself to.

“Don’t bother. Cousin Pinkie is about as sensible as Limestone when it comes to doing things she cares about. That is to say; her way or no way.” Mellow Mender or is it Mellow Cake, commented in annoyance and his cousin snorted and bounced him for the comparison.

“Lime is a bitch and everyone knows it. Don’t compare me to that absolute-oh, we’re here.” Diane dropped Mellow on his ass at the entrance to a stone bakery that, to my relief, was as colorful as I remembered Sugarcube Corner to be. Even if it was the same stone as the others. “Aunt Cuppy! Mellow’s home!” She shouted through the door and then used a hoof to casually lift-kick her petite cousin inside before closing the door. “Okay then, we’re heading to Rarity’s place, you have somewhere to stay, big guy?”

“Um, why isn’t he-right. Girl’s night.” I felt warm at the idea of having a sole, hunky, mrr sexy male at an otherwise all-girl’s hangout. My brain turned to mush at the thought of us ganging up on him and-.

“That is why there’s no boys allowed for girl’s night. It’s to talk about boys, not to indulge in them. It doesn’t help that even after two generations we’re all still adjusting to the more malleable menstruation cycles of Tamriel.” Diane said knowingly and my tail twitched.

“I have a place to stay, no problem. Tell Twilight that Neethsi Nagnaresh needs to see her as soon as possible starting tomorrow however.” Neethsi patted my shoulder and then turned the direction opposite where Diane was still dragging me.

“Wow he’s hot. Bit of a prude though.” Diane commented and I snorted in amused agreement. “Now, just to warn you since you may have similar misguided assumptions. My friends are not your old friends. They are similar, but different. Treat meeting them like it is: meeting them.” Diane stressed and I nodded meekly. “Don’t worry, my friends aren’t as abrasive as me.”

“I can only hope so.” Since you six are the Elements in other worlds and-.

“Ep, ep, ep! Hold on to the life-altering exposition for the next chapter!” What the fuck?

Next Chapter: Ch.9 Estimated time remaining: 18 Hours, 31 Minutes