Ch.50

[Morndas, 30th Last Seed, 4E: 221]

“So which hose was it?” Rarity asked as she looked through the many, many different hoses of the milking machine. Twilight really did have a staggering variety.

“I’d just say the one with the dildo, but there’s several of those and we have no clue which is for which fluid or whatever.” Shade mewled and I had to agree. Twilight has way too many attachments for this thing to be in any way reasonable.

“Any ideas, Neethsi?” I asked our goddess, but she shrugged along with the rest of us.

“I’d have suggested letting me vent it out of our bodies with magic, but we don’t know what my sexual fluids will do to the environment.” Neethsi shook her head, similarly stumped.

“Oh my gosh, there’s more of them.” Brennie groaned, drawing our attention to the door to find Brennie along with three alicorns in a similar state as us with aetheric bodies. “Neethsi, what are you doing here? I was told you needed to head for Thras pronto by Hermais, who said she was told that by Eris and Akatosh.” From the sound of things, she’s pissed off at them.

“Then ask Twilight to point out the nozzle meant to drain aetheric fluids from wombs.” At Neethsi’s huffy reply, the rainbow-maned alicorn with 3 more colors than the tri-colored maned mare swiftly retrieved the right dildo/hose combination. “Then I’ll go first and be on my way.” Neethsi got on the table and the straps secured her before the hose shoved up her snatch with a groan of pleasure and the pump got to work on her.

“My. Such a glorious vision of Beauty. Sister, is this the one Dibella would not cease speaking of?” The both starry maned and bodied mare asked the tri-color mane mare.

“No, I believe it is the two other argonians next to that radiant unicorn.” Tri-mane commented and I felt absolutely bashful for a moment. “Pardon, I’m Celestia and this is Luna. You may have heard of us.” My heart suddenly ached with longing for my own Celestia. The mare was pretty much literally my mother in all but blood.

“Yes, that would be so. Dibella summoned them to her cloister just to praise Meen-Rei. I would assume, however, that Neethsi took her place back on top so-to-speak.” Rarity said before she suddenly gasped and fainted dramatically upon a fainting couch she subconsciously summoned to catch her.

“...I haven’t seen Rarity do that in a couple of months.” Twilight commented and then turned to Brennie. “Okay, so, Rarity is quite dramatic, but at least she had a delayed reaction. That’s good, right?” Twilight asked her mate hopefully.

“I’m getting too old for this shit.” Brennie sighed depressedly and walked away, obviously done with it all. “Come find me when you need something. If not, leave me in peace.”

“Don’t talk like that! Deities tend to fuck-off to Aetherius when they think that way!” Neethsi shouted after her in warning.

“I’m not from here and Aetherius will never accept me.” Why must you think this way? It hurts just to hear you say such things.

“Mundus may not care, Aetherius also does not care who you were. Rather, it’s any deities you worship. Just don’t get excessively fed up with everything. Go take a break.” Twilight gently insisted and then kissed Brennie on the lips before closing the door after she left. “Okay. So. We need a plan.”

“We?” I said with incredulousness. “I was going to go through serious training or ask Hermais for the cheating book of cheats.” The door opened and a massive book was flung at my head, which I caught with a yelp. “Oh! Thanks!” I was about to open it, but a spooky owl eye, better than old Mora’s eye, opened on the cover.

“I have augmented the Oghma Infinium. Instead of instilling lifetimes of skill into you, it will instead act as a focus for you to channel your efforts into. It is greater to gain skill through your own efforts, is it not?” Jhunal wisely questioned before his eye closed, leaving the daedric artifact unblemished besides the blemishes of the flesh composing its binding. Aw, so it isn’t the cheaty cheating book of cheats, but at least it was a massive XP booster.

“That is good to hear. I always believed the Oghma Infinium to be a horribly cheap-ah!” Neethsi yelped when she realized her cosmic form was back to normal. “Excellent! At least for a bit I won’t be so blatantly divine.” Neethsi was released from the table and the hose retracted from her sex so she could stand.

“I’m still going to have a time of trying to figure out uses for all of this aetheric fluid I’m collecting.” Twilight muttered before she began hooking up the milker fully and summoned more tables.

“Be safe.” I said and kissed Neethsi before the others did the same.

“Hey, with the Trident of Tides and my power, along with my immunity to all toxins and diseases, I’m the worst nightmare of the Sloads. Don’t worry, I’ll ensure they never trouble the world again.” Neethsi darkly promised and then waved farewell before she summoned...a super-sexy bikini made of sea shells that only covered her areola and groin, then she warped away.

“Come on, I wanna get pumped so I can stop being tempted to keep it in until the contraceptives wear off.” Shade huffed and I whined at feeling the same way.

📜

Neethsi swam west-northwest of Summerset from the docks of Lilandril without complication. The people of Summerset were still reeling from the rebellion and overthrow of the Dominion government, so there weren’t any guards willing or able, to interfere with the hourglass-bodied hyper-busty and motherly-hipped 7 foot tall naga in nothing but a seashell bikini strolling down the street to the docks.

However, she still encountered resistance far sooner than she imagined. Not even a few nautical miles from Summerset did she encounter a necrotic army of zombie fish, sea serpents, sharks, dreugh and other aquatic species. Behind them were their fat, corpulent, disgusting masters, who promptly tried to kill her with a poison destruction spell tainting the ocean.

Yeah...that was about as effective as trying to drown an argonian. Oh wait.

Neethsi waved her trident and swiveled her hips as her free hand waved. The water around the zombie hordes and the Sloads ceased to exist yet the water around them remained static. They plummeted to their doom on the rocks of the ocean floor minutes later and Neethsi replaced the water before continuing on.

Good thing she came when she did. On land, they would’ve ironically been more dangerous.

📜

After we were all pumped of Neethsi’s contagious sexy aura thingy, Twilight led us all to her living quarters since even though Celestia and Luna weren’t hiding themselves, Twilight didn’t want absolutely everyone able to see them right now.

“So why are we involved?” I asked in annoyance of the three stupid-sexy alicorns that had matching bodies to us. What is Brennie feeding Twilight? That said, how did whatever she do to Twilight cause Celestia and Luna to look like color-swapped versions of her with longer horns?

“Darling, surely you can see why?” Rarity asked rhetorically, only for me to shake my head. “What? Meen-Rei, you’re a Hero! With Neethsi unavailable, you’re the most credible person to vouch for them aside from Twilight, who like she established, currently isn’t very popular with all of the emergency political moves she made to save the world.”

“Stupid butt-hurt politicians.” Shade grumbled and I nodded in sour agreement.

“And we can’t bring Brennie in, she isn’t very popular either. Even though she’s done everything within her power to prepare our troops for battle, equipping them with the best gear she has drawn up and teaching other officers on new strategies and tactics, she’s flipping thousands of years of military tradition on their head. Not to mention the assassin sent out to spy on her by one of the council.” Twilight highlighted in frustration and I held up a hand.

“Well, then we shouldn’t be popular either. Shade and I introduced guns to this world. We’ve rewritten how battles are engaged just by introducing one new weapon.” I reasoned, only for the three alicorns to smile at me, as if I had just proven how naive I am.

“Actually young ladies, that makes you more popular.” Luna countered and I gawked at her.

“...How?!” That makes no fucking sense!

“You see, there’s a disparity between someone who is actively working for change and someone who sparks change. The former is always seen as an intruder and the latter is always seen as a historic paragon. Brennie is personally altering the situation on her terms, you just gave the system a new tool and left it to its own devices.” Celestia lectured and I shared an anguished groan with Shade at the stupidity of this!

“Fine then! What do we have to do? What can we do?” Shade demanded in annoyance and the three alicorns, who were so similar they had to be family, shared a sly smirk.

📜

Brennie was going through her paperwork when she sensed the intruder and she sighed out of her nose, but was thankful when the assassin simply appeared in front of her desk. She was less grateful when she sat down at the chair for visitors. “Does the council need something?”

“No.” She leaned back in the chair and pulled up a bloody sack. “Found this skulking around outside.” She dropped the bleeding bag on the thankfully clear part of her desk and Brennie rubbed her face in exasperation. “In case you’ll take my word, it’s a dremora’s head. Morag Tong aren’t allowed to kill anyone unless we have a writ for it. Monsters don’t count.”

“How the hell did one get in? Is there an infestation?” Brennie questioned and looked inside the bag, finding the beast’s head. Wow, these buggers are uglier than the old Hell demons.

“Not like you would know it, no. As for how, this wretch was wearing a full kit of layered Chameleon enchantments. One of the most costly and effective means of permanent Invisibility. However, the fetcher’s enchanters didn’t bother to Muffle him, so it was easy enough to use a Detect spell to find him upon hearing him.” The assassin replied before fiddling with a throwing knife like it was a fidget toy.

“I’m guessing since you killed it, you get to keep its gear?” Brennie asked the assassin, closing up the bag.

“That’s usually how it works, but layered Chameleon hasn’t been seen since the Oblivion Crisis, since only Sigil Stones were known to have a Chameleon effect powerful enough to layer without a ring on every finger and toe. I’m going to ask you to deliver it to Arch-Mage Twilight for examination since the Arch-Mage of Winterhold and Neloth are both too far away.” The assassin then yanked the rest of the corpse out of her belt satchel and let it tumble to the floor.

“Thanks. I’ll make sure to deliver it. Tell me though, will we be seeing more than just monsters coming our way?” Brennie questioned accusingly.

“I’m not at liberty to say, just know that monster is a rather subjective term, but it’s the literal meaning you need to worry about.” The assassin offered obtusely, then remained seated.

“Ah, shit. Why am I even here? They don’t like me, hate my guts for all these changes I bring.” Brennie grumbled as she considered the bottom drawer of the desk, which for some reason had whiskey in it. That idly bothered her since she took over this office.

“You know nothing about politics. They all hate each other, that doesn’t mean they won’t work with one another. They just hate you enough to be united on it, but acknowledge your contributions enough that they don’t want to just have you killed and be done with it. Otherwise we’d be having a very different conversation, likely with my corpse next to that one.” The assassin rebutted and even kicked her boots up onto the desk to lean back further.

“Where I’m from; War and Politics don’t mix. We never mix the two, otherwise things get messy and blurry. What kind of King would I be if I can’t lead any of my people?” Brennie sighed as she thought about drinking that whiskey, she wouldn’t need to be concerned about her babies because of how the magic woven into her worked. The bottle was half-empty, she remembered.

“Oh, so you’re foreign royalty on top of being an Outworlder Deity. Wow. That’s going to cause some people to have seizures. I wish I could see it.” The assassin chuckled darkly. “They’re already going to have conniptions when I report Twilight resurrected Celestia and Luna. This is so fun.”

“...You know what? Fuck it! You can go tell them what you’ve learned here today. Get those worthless twats off their asses and do something other than sitting around and complaining about useless shit. Excluding the Dovahkiin himself, he’s fine.” Brennie demanded, fuck holding back, there’s another fucking Planemeld coming around and ain’t nobody got time for complaints! Especially herself!

“Including that you and Twilight are the hottest fucks on Tamriel? This is the best assignment I’ve ever had. Y’know, if I didn’t have to consider killing you as part of the job, I’d rather enjoy sticking around. So much ridiculousness seems drawn to you.” The assassin cackled before she vanished and the throwing knife landed blade-first into the corpse on the floor.

“Hm, I wonder if there’s a way to get her to work for me?” Brennie grinned like a maniac as she pondered on it. That Morag Tong agent would be perfect to have on her side.

“Commission only.” The chitin-armored assassin suddenly said from next to her before vanishing with a snicker. Damn she was spooky, how’d she completely disappear from her senses?

“Definitely placing a commission for her, might have to quadruple the payment, but it’ll be worth it.” Brennie decided as she was about to write up one...

“Or~. Sexual favors are accepted too~.” Brennie stiffened when the assassin somehow appeared straddling her lap. How the fuck?! “I’ve been watching you and Twilight going at it like nix hounds in heat. I’d like an in, if only for some of the fun. However, I will have to write up a contract and I’m still bound by my writ on you. So, just come up with a task and I’ll see if I can work it into my schedule.” She patted Brennie’s cheek and then seemed to vanish again.

“...That also works, too. But first, corpse and gear!” With that said, Brennie picked up the head, its body and the knife, then made the journey to Twilight’s office.

📜

...This is ridiculously epic. I’ve never paid witness to one before, but a spontaneous pony flash-mob was really awesome. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I followed the advice that I let the compulsions of the music sweep me along. “-Rejoice~! Rejoice~!-” Also I had no clue Rarity was a soprano!

The plan was crazy, but it was glorious. We started up a song in Twilight’s room, followed the cadence in moving outside, then burst into the first chorus upon entering the courtyard. The musical magic inherent to ponies swept through everyone, including non-ponies. An impromptu parade rapidly assembled with singing, dancing and fun!

“-For the Princesses have~! Re~! Turned~!” We finished upon reaching Lilmoth city square with Twilight hugging Celestia and Luna to her sides and magic fireworks were launched into the midday sky.

The moment the spell was broken, ponies cheered rabidly in elation while all the non-ponies were bemused and in awe of the event. I know I was! “People of Lilmoth. As you can see, the twin goddesses of the skies have returned from Aetherius!” Twilight announced formally from her place hovering above the fountain.

This was met with more cheers and some of the natives were still bemused while other species from Equestria joined in the excitement. “We apologize, our beloved citizens. Because of our failures, your ancestors had to flee your homeland. We have returned because your efforts gave us an opening to do so. We plan to assist Princess Twilight in her duties rather than attempt to supersede her.” Celestia announced, causing even locals to perk up in relief.

“That said, in these trying times, it is time that Equestrians of all races stepped up! You’ve done well for yourselves, you’ve found stable and safe niches in this new society, but you’ve been coddled for long enough! All of you, are you proud to be Equestrians?!” Luna asked and got resounding cheers as worry rose among locals. “Then don’t just continue as you are, excel, exceed! Give our gracious hosts every reason to be thankful for our inclusion in their lands!”

The excitement was overwhelming and the relief from the locals was palpable. I still don’t fully get why Shade and I had to be involved in this. We were just part of the crowd now. Something about bridging with the natives.

“So! We are going to approach the Ebonheart Council on urban and rural renewal and settlement plans. If any of you have any sense of wanderlust, adventure or are simply tired of your domestic lives. Prepare for an opportunity!” Twilight announced and a good percentage of the crowd, natives too, cheered in excitement at the idea.

“Now, go about your days everyone. We’ll be with Princess Twilight as her assistants until further notice.” Celestia declared and the three flew back towards the campus, leaving the crowd to disperse, chat or otherwise do whatever they were doing before the flash mob swept them up.

“Well dears, that was fun.” Rarity tittered when she turned to us and clasped hands with Shade and I. “Music is very important to us Equestrians, I hope that wasn’t too much of a culture shock.” Rarity rubbed our knuckles and I felt myself calm with a chuckle.

“It was disorienting at first, but that was incredible.” I replied and leaned in, kissing Rarity in public. She hummed into my lips and pulled me in, so I wrapped my arms around her waist.

“Holy shit girls, PDA, really?” Shade hissed and we parted to look at her, only to notice all of the smirking, embarrassed or appalled expressions looking at us. I snorted and nuzzled Rarity, to which she flushed brightly with a giggle and a smile.

“Let them look. I’m not on the market anymore.” Rarity cooed and smooched me on the cheek, then did the same for Shade. “I’ve got to get back to my boutique. Stay safe you two.” Rarity turned and walked away, adding an extra sway to her hips. I’m such a lucky woman.

Next Chapter: Ch.51 Estimated time remaining: 9 Hours, 11 Minutes