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All's Fair In Love and War 2: Changeling Tides

by CrimsonWolf360

Chapter 32: Chapter 32: No Plan Survives First Contact

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Chapter 32: No Plan Survives First Contact

The Following Day

Shining Armor paced back and forth as he walked along the castle wall looking over Canterlot, two personal guards at his back. He wore a slight frown on his face, but otherwise kept his expression neutral. Dozens of crystal ponies and Canterlot guards rushed past him to their posts, but said nothing. There was a tenseness in the air that they could all feel, as if they all knew that they had precious little time before the coming storm would hit them.

On his rounds on the wall, Shining eventually came across Captain Valorant once more as she surveyed her troops.

"Val." Shining gave a nod.

"Shiny." Valorant returned the nod.

They didn't say anything more, but no further words needed to be said. They could both read each other's moods and guess what the other was thinking. They bore many of the same concerns of the guards as yet another squad trotted past, looks of concern and fear on their otherwise disciplined faces.

The morning passed relatively swiftly, and soon enough the sun was high in the sky. Shining glanced up at the ball of light just for a moment, but a moment was all it took. The two guards trotting along behind him were levitated into the air, their hooves flailing in panic as they floated away. Before Shining could notice, however, his helmet disappeared with a *pop*, and Discord suddenly appeared beside him, wearing his helmet.

"Shining Armor. Why, whatever are you doing here?" Discord asked, even going so far as to wrap and arm around the stallion as if he were addressing an old friend.

Shining instantly knocked the draconequues away and took up a defensive posture, "Back off, traitor." He snarled.

"The only one Discord betrayed was himself," Tirek spoke out, directing Shining and Discord's eyes to him as he finished syphoning the magic from the last of Shining's guards, "Abandoning his true nature to make 'friends' with weak-minded equines who offer him nothing."

Shining grit his teeth and fired a beam of purple magic at the centaur, who merely caught it in his giant hand. The colossal centaur stood over three times a pony's height, dwarfing even Celestia with his massive stature. The comparatively puny beam of magic was nothing more than a mild inconvenience to the titan, and he only confirmed that by literally throwing the magic into his mouth and eating it.

Tirek leaned down and grabbed a hold of Shining's muzzle, effectively immobilizing him as he syphoned the stallion's magic. Shining's legs trembled as he felt his strength leaving him, and after losing all of his magic, he collapsed to the ground. Discord winced ever so slightly as Shining fell to the floor, but after a moment, he slowly sat up and looked over to him.

"How... could you... do this?" Shining managed, before collapsing once more, his strength leaving him entirely.

Discord looked at Shining Armor in concern for just a moment, but Tirek quickly swooped in and wrapped an arm around him, "Why don't you go and have a little fun? I won't stand in your way." Tirek announced, turning and heading toward the throne room.

Discord giggled to himself as he rubbed his claws together, the thought of all the chaos he could reap, filling his mind.


"He's coming." Luna announced, turning from the window to Anon.

"Alright. This is our one chance, everyone. Let's do this right, yeah?" Anon replied, turning to the rest of the ponies in the room.

"A-alright... let's do this." Cadence stuttered, shaking slightly in place.

Celestia gently put her hoof on Cadence's wither, calming her down slightly, "Just remember what I taught you. Deep breaths. We've got this." She offered, encouragingly.

Cadence gratefully smiled at the solar alicorn, giving a nod of affirmation before following her advice and taking several deep breaths, "O-okay. I'm good. Thank you."

Celestia nodded, before turning to Anon as Luna retook her spot on the throne, "Alright. Let's do this." She stated, fixing Anon with a serious look.

The sounds of destruction and shouting reached their ears through the massive throne room doors. Ponies scrambling about in a desperate attempt to flee or fight, was drowned out only by the vibration that reverberated through the entire building with each colossal step the titanic centaur took. They grew closer and close, until they were just outside the door, rattling each of the alicorns and Anon as they approached. Then, the door exploded into a shower of splinters that rained down over half the room.

The massive form of Tirek quickly entered the room, his gaze already locked onto the three alicorns sitting on their thrones before him. He didn't even pay the human any mind as he approached.

"Jav, now!" Anon cried out, the guardstallion quickly darting out from his hiding spot behind them and igniting his horn. A portal appeared behind them, clearly showing the badlands and the changeling hive just a few hundred feet away. All three alicorns swiftly jumped through the portal, along with Anon, much to Tirek's anger.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" He shouted, galloping toward them.

Before Tirek could reach the portal, it fizzled out and dissipated, leaving nothing for the titan to grab. Fury barely began to describe the expression on his face, and without skipping a beat, Tirek grabbed Javelin with his magic and levitated him over to his hand. He angrily grabbed him by the neck, a ferocious glare on his face.

"Where have they gone. Where have you sent them!?" He demanded, thrashing the poor guard around like a ragdoll.

"Gack... go... to... Tar-tarus..." Javelin croaked, his voice barely audible as his windpipe was squeezed.

Tirek continued to grit his teeth and squeeze even tighter, until Javelin's white face turned blue from a lack of oxygen.

"There's no need for that. I saw exactly where they went." Discord spoke up, prompting Tirek to loosen his grip and turn to the draconequus.

"Where!?" He demanded.

"The Badlands." Discord replied, slightly fazed by the anger in Tirek's voice.

"The Badlands?" Tirek questioned, tossing Javelin to the side as if he were simply not worth his time anymore.

Discord nodded, "The Changeling hive is out there. I'm sure what with Chrysalis siding with the ponies, they've got the bright idea to hide there. Oh, by the way, there are a bunch of changelings under Canterlot mountain, just so you know." He offered, returning to his self-appointed task of rearranging the murals on the window.

Tirek took in the news for a few moments, his tongue rolling in his mouth. After taking enough time to digest the information, he let out a chuckle, "Oh, that's too rich. Running and hiding won't save them. Soon, every earth pony, pegasus and unicorn will bow to my will." He declared, grinning evilly.

"You meant our will, didn't you?" Discord asked, worriedly glancing over as he manipulated the stained glass before him.

"Of course," Tirek replied with a slight bow, "Here, I want you to have something. This was given to me by someone very close to me. I give it to you as a sign of my gratitude and loyalty." He announced, taking the golden necklace from his neck and putting it on Discord.

"Oh my! I do love a good accessory," Discord happily responded, looking down to his new trinket, "I suppose that's Rarity's influence."

Tirek glanced up at the stained glass window now depicting him and Discord, one holding a sword and the other holding a long sub sandwich with the tip having been cut off by the blade. Their arms were wrapped around each other in a clear display of comradery.

"Amusing, but we have no time for such things. We need to go find those three princes..es..." Tirek trailed off as he walked past the mural depicting Twilight's ascension, "Is this meant to be humorous!?" He thundered, turning to Discord.

"Oh, no! I haven't touched that one yet." Discord dismissively replied.

"There is a fourth? And you did not tell me this!?" Tirek demanded, pointing a finger at Discord.

"I just needed some assurance that you truly considered this a team effort. And now I have it." Discord answered.

"Then where can we find this fourth princess? Where is her castle?" Tirek demanded, grabbing Discord by the throat.

"Castle? Oh, no," Discord laughed, "Princess Twilight lives above a library in Ponyville. Castle? Ohhahahah." He giggled.

Tirek dropped Discord and rubbed his hands together, "Not for much longer... First, the other three in the badlands. Then, I will take what is mine." He growled, so low and quiet that Discord didn't hear him.

Tirek stomped away from the windows, his magical aura melting the glass depicting Twilight's ascension as the ground trembled under him.

"So, would we be going to the Badlands now, then?" Discord questioned, curiously.

Tirek nodded, "Take us there. I will make this quick."

Discord smiled as he snapped his fingers, both him and Tirek disappearing with a *pop*.

The air fell silent as the two titans disappeared, leaving only a thoroughly disheveled Javelin gasping for air near the throne. He coughed air back into his lungs a few times, his bloodshot eyes glancing up to confirm that they were both truly gone. When he saw no sign of them, he gave a shaky nod and got back up to his hooves. Not a moment later, Raven came bursting through the doorway behind the throne.

"Javelin! Honey, are you alright!?" The mare shouted, galloping over to her fiancé and checking him for injuries.

Javelin nodded, "I'm alright. I'm okay. Just a little winded is all. Let's get back there before they pop back here. Faust knows how long Anon's going to last against the two of them." He shuddered, as if fearing the worst.

Raven nodded and escorted him to the door she'd only just emerged from, to a lone staircase. She supported him by pressing her wither against his, ensuring that he had to use less energy to stay upright. The gesture, small as it may have been, was immensely appreciated, and guardstallion leaned over to nuzzle his cheek against her neck.

"Thanks, Raven." Javelin cooed.

Raven gingerly kissed his muzzle, "No more putting you in the line of fire. I still can't believe you talked me into letting you do that." She admonished.

Javelin chuckled, an effort that quickly turned into a hacking cough, "Okay, fair enough." He croaked.

Together, they swiftly reached the bottom of the staircase and approached one of seven doors. It looked just like all the others, but as they approached, a thin slat opened, revealing a set of slitted amber eyes.

"Password?" Dusk questioned, professionally.

"Bravo Alpha Lima Lima Sierra." Javelin replied, slightly hoarse.

The slat quickly closed and the door unlocked, before Dusk pulled it open, allowing Javelin and Raven to enter.

"I swear to Faust. We are never letting Anon create the passwords again." Raven muttered under her breath.

"I mean... to be fair, I doubt even Discord would think of something so crass." Javelin offered with a shrug as Dusk closed the door behind him.

The duo quickly reached another door, and found Twilight standing beside Echo in front of it.

"How'd it go? Did the portal work right?" She asked, worriedly, "I couldn't see if I cast it in the right place from down here."

"I think it went about perfectly. Discord and Tirek know about you, though." Raven reported.

Twilight frowned, "Well, hopefully Anon's plan works and we can be rid of Tirek before he can do any more damage." She replied.

Raven nodded and walked over to the door. Echo promptly opened it for her, as she walked through, followed immediately by Javelin and Twilight. Upon entering the small room, they were met by Cadence while Celestia and Luna sat on beds on opposite sides of the room.

"Everything alright?" Cadence asked.

Twilight nodded as Javelin leaned on his fiancé, "Aside from a sore throat for the foreseeable future, I think everything is fine." He replied.

"What do you mean? Are you hurt?" Cadence asked, concerned.

At the mention of somepony being hurt, Celestia slowly got out of her bed, a look of great concern on her features as Javelin turned slightly to show the deep bruises on his neck.

"Oh my goodness. Sergenat, I-" Celestia began, letting out a groan.

Javelin, Raven, Twilight, and Cadence glanced over to Celestia just as the sound splashing water emanated from beside the bed.

"What was that?" Javelin asked.

The group glanced over to the bed, revealing a horrified looking Celestia, and what appeared to be a puddle directly under her hind legs. Barely a moment later, Luna fearfully glanced down at her bed, finding that she was soaking the sheets as well.

"My water just broke." Celestia stated, clearly in shock, herself.

"Mine too..." Luna whispered.


Anon rushed over to the entrance of the hive alongside Celestia, Luna, and Cadence. The four of them quickly made their way across the empty, desolate fields surrounding the hive and rushed to the entrance. They made it inside just a few moments before Tirek and Discord appeared back where they were previously. As they made it inside, they were swiftly greeted by one of the unicorns and Cornicle.

"Everypony is in place. Did they follow you?" He asked asked, curtly.

Anon looked over his shoulder to see the two titans standing back at the edge of the small crater the hive resided in, "Yeah. They followed us alright. You guys ready?"

The unicorn nodded, "Ready when you are."

Anon returned the nod, "Alright, you three can drop those disguises until they reach the door. We'll need to bait them as far into the hive as possible."

Celestia, Luna, and Cadence dropped their disguises, revealing Pharynx, Thorax, and Ocellus. The three changelings quickly galloped ahead, followed by the unicorn as Anon held his position at the door. Cornicle stood by his side, the small drone nervously looking back and forth between the entrance and the interior of the hive.

"They look confused. I think their magic isn't working from there." Anon muttered.

The draconequues and centaur appeared to be having a discussion that was getting rather heated, rather quickly.

"What do you mean you can't bring them out here!?" Tirek's voice boomed from across the field.

Anon grimaced as he watched Tirek's massive form shouting at the comparatively small draconequues. Even from his distance, Anon could see the veins bulging on Tirek's forehead from the sheer rage he was expressing. Despite the whole situation, and his feelings toward the traitorous draconequees, he couldn't help but feel just a little bad for the tongue lashing Discord was receiving.

"Then we'll drag them out by their hind legs!" Tirek shouted once more, before turning and stomping toward the hive.

"Alright, they're coming." Anon announced, turning to Cornicle.

"Okay. This way." Cornicle replied, turning tail and trotting into the hive.

Anon quickly followed behind, just now taking in the changeling hive interior. The walls were a dark green, and covered in a dried slime that fragmented off in several sections and gave the walls a spikey texture. Tall ceilings filled the entrance, littered with stalactites and cobwebs. Holes appeared and disappeared in the walls as Anon followed the small changeling all the way into the center of the structure.

"Just over here and up the stairs." Cornicle instructed, galloping just ahead of Anon.

Anon hastily sprinted after him until they arrived at the center foyer of the hive. The ceiling shot up to over eighty feet high, and the walls moved rapidly, as if the entire hive were just a large heart, beating every second. Anon paused for a moment to stare up at the strikingly eerie structure around him. He was swiftly swept out of his reverie by Cornicle's voice once more.

"Prince Anon! This way!" He cried, buzzzing up to the upper walkways of the hive.

Anon shook his head clear of his fascination and ran over to the nearby staircase. His shoes made goopy-sticking sounds with each step he took, a fact that made him cringe as he hastily made his way up the stairs. It took him nearly a minute, but he reached the level Cornicle was on just before Tirek and Discord could reach the front entrance of the hive.

With their position now taken, both Anon and Cornicle hid behind some green sludge that was piled up high enough to make a pillar to support the ceiling. The two managed to completely hide themselves as the rest of the group adjusted in their own positions. A moment passed in complete silence, as the titans approached, but that was quickly interrupted by the sound of hooves on the floor as Phoenix flew in and trotted up behind Anon.

"Phoenix? What are you doing up here? I thought you were on the second level?" Anon quietly questioned.

"Too cramped down there. I can do more from up here. Don't worry, I won't get in your way," Phoenix coolly replied, hiding behind the pillar as well, "So... you really think we can do this?" He asked, looking over to Anon.

Anon pursed his lips and looked down to the floor, "We have to. If we don't, then Equestria falls." He replied, simply.

Phoenix nodded, "Good enough for me." He replied, before turning to Cornicle, "Hey, what's your name again?"

"Cornicle." The changeling replied.

"I talked with the other changelings earlier... didn't he hit you in the head with a frying pan?" Phoenix asked, pointing to Anon.

Cornicle nodded, "With a frying pan."

Anon let out a long sigh, "Fuck... you just reminded me. I didn't bring it." He admitted, sadly.

Phoenix shook his head, "Welp, if it wasn't jinxed before, it certainly is now." He tsked.

Anon rolled his eyes, "We aren't jinxed... we just don't have my ultimate weapon." He admitted, sadly.

"Here they come. Quiet!" Cornicle hissed, looking to both Anon and Phoenix.

The man and pony quickly silenced themselves and just barely peaked their heads over the edge. Just a moment later, the reverberations of Tirek's heavy hooffalls echoed in the large hive as he stomped into the center. Discord meekly trotted in behind him, worriedly glancing back and forth as if looking for something to jump out and attack him.

As they reached the middle of the foyer, Tirek glanced up and around the room, as if just now taking in his surroundings for the first time.

"Princesses! Come out and face me!" He shouted, his booming voice filling the structure.

Even Anon found himself subconsciously pressing himself lower to the ground to hide from just the imposing sound of Tirek's voice alone. The prospect of going toe-to-toe with the behemoth absolutely terrified him. Luckily, he wasn't alone.

Tirek's voice echoed off the many halls of the structure for a few seconds before silence fell over them all once more. Then, Cadence quickly galloped out from her hiding spot on the second level and into a hole that conveniently opened for her. Not a moment later, Luna flew out of her spot and into a hole on the first level, just a few dozen feet from Tirek and Discord. Finally, Celestia popped out from the opposite side of the third level across from Anon and glided into the same hold Cadence used. It closed just a few seconds later, leaving Tirek even more furious.

"Grrrrah! Stay here. I will get them. They may still have their magic for now, but they also have nowhere else they can run." Tirek announced, stepping away from Discord.

"Um... are you sure we shouldn't stick together?" Discord asked, warily, "I-I mean... if they still have their magic and we don't, then splitting up sounds like a surefire way to get captured."

Tirek ignored the draconequues and walked over to the wall. He cocked his arm back and punched it with all his might, instantly shattering the chitinous material making up the wall and carving out a section big enough for him to walk through.

"I don't think that's going to be much of a problem. Whatever they're using to disable our magic only affects what we cast, not the magic inside us. I still have the strength of a hundred thousand earth ponies, unicorns, and pegasai at my fingertips." He chuckled.

"Yes well... I don't." Discord replied, following after Tirek.

"Hmm... then go find the source of whatever is disrupting our magic. I will keep the princesses on the run. I'm sure a God of chaos can destroy whatever little trinket they're using to keep us from using our full power... or are you saying you're scared of little ponies?" Tirek questioned, turning on Discord.

"Wha-scared? Me? Moi? Oh-hoho no! Not at all!" Discord dismissed, waving his claws.

Tirek nodded, "Good. Then you go find it. I will deal with the princesses. I'll tear this entire hive down if I have to." He announced, before storming off.

Discord cringed as the sound of destruction and angry shouting echoed from the direction Tirek pursued. He hesitantly glanced back toward the entrance, almost as if debating whether or not to just run for it. He eventually looked down to the medallion around his neck, gently holding it in his paw. After a few seconds of silent deliberation, he turned and made his way back to the staircase leading upwards.

Discord quickly reached the second floor and proceeded through one of the holes in the wall, a determined yet still clearly uneasy look on his features. The vibrations and sounds of Tirek's destruction quickly faded as he made his way through his own cave. As he progressed toward the end of his cave, the exit suddenly closed, plunging the chaos god into darkness.

"Well... I suppose it can't get much worse." Discord muttered, putting his claws on his hips.

His ears quickly perked up to the sound of something behind him, and he whirled around on his hind legs, arms poised in a karate pose as he tried to see whatever was approaching him in the dark. He couldn't quite make out anything, but the sound of approaching hoofsteps quickly reached him, and he found his entire body tensing for a fight.

However, it took him completely by surprise as a black form lunged out from beside him, tackling him to the ground. Discord tried to fight, but the creature simply vomited green slime all over his arm, almost instantly immobilizing him.

"Ewwwwww." Discord gagged as he tried to free his arm.

The approaching hoofsteps quickly reached him, and much to his horror, Discord found the rest of his limbs similarly entombed in whatever sludge the shadow creatures kept vomiting onto him.

"Will you all stop that!? It's disgusting!" Discord cried out, retching in disgust.

"That should keep him immobile." A male voice spoke out.

"We could keep his mouth shut too." A female voice replied.

"Did I ever tell you how proud I am of you?" The male voice replied.

"W-wait, wait a second now." Discord protested, frantically thrashing back and forth as the figures approached him.

The sound of the walls opening once more barely concealed the sound of vomiting changelings and a screaming draconequues as Anon, Phoenix, and Cornicle entered. A look of disgust immediately formed on Anon's face as Ocellus galloped up to him, a beaming smile on her face.

"We got him, Prince Anon!" She chirped, chipper as can be.

Anon gave a slow nod as he looked up to the immobilized Discord, finding tears streaking down his furry cheeks as his mouth was sealed by the hardened green slime Pharynx was finishing up. Anon nervously gulped as he adjusted his collar. The smell made him struggle not to gag, but the sight made him downright sick.

"Remind me to never get captured by you guys... like, ever." He shivered.

"Why would we capture you?' Ocellus innocently asked.

Anon shook his head, "Nevermind that. Good work, you two. That's one down... one really big fucker to go."


Author's Note

Looks like Anon's plan is working so far! Hooray! I can't wait for you all to see what happens next :D

Oh! For anyone interested, I have finally made a discord server! If you want to chat with me, hang out and play games or watch me stream art and such, feel free to join :D

https://discord.gg/zSB8EUuA

Next Chapter: Chapter 33: A Gardener in a Battlefield Estimated time remaining: 2 Hours, 3 Minutes
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All's Fair In Love and War 2: Changeling Tides

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