All in the Family
Chapter 7: 7. The Night Ends
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Filly Fooler.
The term was one that everypony heard a thousand times growing up. That and colt cuddler were often exchanged on the schoolyards between kids as light teases without regard to the deeper meaning behind the words.
One would think that everypony would grow up and realize how hurtful those names were to a pony who was attracted to the same sex, but some poor saps didn’t get the memo.
Saltine, Fluttershy’s brother, was the very sap. The earth pony, in drunken stupor, called his sister’s soulmate that disparaging term.
Suddenly, Fluttershy’s closeted behavior became clear as the day to her friends.
“Babe, we talked about this. Don’t say that.” Fox Trottingham spoke to her husband, clearly embarrassed by his malediction, especially in the company of strangers; strangers who were friends of family.
Unfortunately, the damage was done.
“Ah beg yer pardon?” Applejack immediately responded, clearly there was some anger rising in her.
“Applejack, calm down.” Twilight said to the cowpony, although her attempts to reign her in were futile.
“Justa sec, Twi, Ah gotta ask this guy what nerve he’s got callin’ one of mah friends a filly fooler.”
Saltlick immediately took note of this revelation. “Hey now! Flutters, you and your friends now Rainbow Dash?”
Applejack glared at the pegasus’s father, “Yes we do, she’s one of our best friends, and I aint gonna have any of y’all call her no filly fooler!”
Rarity got out of her seat and tried to mollify her indignant friend, putting a hoof on her shoulder, but Applejack knocked it away.
Saltlick got out of his seat as well. “You misunderstand. I’ve actually been reading about Rainbow Dash in the news. Flutters didn’t tell me you guys were friends with her. I gotta say I’m mighty impressed.”
The tension in the scene was slightly subdued. However, as with everything Saltlick had said this evening, further questions were raised?
Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Why does that impress you?’
“Well, I mean, I read in the paper about how she broke the sound barrier with a rainbow streak. Not even my wife could do that, and she was a pretty damn good flier. I tell you, if that girl doesn’t get into the Wonderbolts, I’m quitting my day job.”
Twilight smiled; happy that at least somepony from Fluttershy’s family said something nice about Rainbow Dash. “Well, we’ll certainly have to tell Rainbow Dash gets back from Cloudsdale. She certainly loves having fans.”
Applejack and Rarity, however, returned their looks to the slightly inebriated stallion sitting on the couch.
The unicorn was the first to pipe up. “That still doesn’t excuse what YOU just said.”
Foxy started to lower her head in shame. She was certainly embarrassed of her husband’s behavior in front of a pony she respected so much.
Saltine sat up and took off his baseball cap and put his hoof in it like a beggar. “Look, I didn’t mean to offend anypony; honest. It’s just one of those things, you hear it so much, and you just kind of say it without taking into consideration the feelings of others. I’m not like that, I swear.”
Sadness shaped Saltlick’s eyes as he replied, “My boy’s telling the truth. To be honest, I would call Him a colt cuddler or Flutters a filly fooler anytime they acted femmy or butch, but they were just a joke. I probably tossed it around too many times, and it rubbed off on Saltine. Believe me, when I say this family does not hate anypony.”
It was there that the two mares exchanged remorseful glances with Rarity letting out a deep sigh.
Applejack rubbed the back of her neck with her hoof before sheepishly piping out, “Ah uh, probably shouldn’tve jumped on ya. Sorry about that.”
Rarity nodded, “We’re sorry to have made this so awkward. I’m sure family of someone as wonderful as Fluttershy is very open and accepting of other lifestyles.”
It was then that Saltine raised an eyebrow. “Wait, who’s asking us to accept them?”
Awkwardness kicked into overdrive. Saltine proceeded to take another swig of cider.
“Look, I don’t hate anypony, but that doesn’t mean I don’t take issue to how…those ponies live.”
“With how they live?!” Rarity immediately retorted, tone clearly getting sharper and more confrontational.
“Yeah, like…I don’t know about you, but I feel like that whole deal is unnatural. I mean, you can’t have foals with two stallions or two mares. A-and I know what you’re gonna say, “They were born that way” and I will tell you that is dragon-shit. You’re a pony, you have free will, so marry somepony with whom you can reproduce and continue the species.”
Applejack’s eye just twitched at the golden stallion’s “insane troll logic”, completely silent and unable to respond to such asinine reasoning.
Rarity’s disposition just became all the surlier. “So you’re telling me you didn’t marry Foxy out of love? What was it, wedlock?”
Saltine took offense as he stood up. “Now see here, you…”
“Babe please, don’t!” Foxy stood in front of her husband trying to get him to sit back down, but he just lightly moved her aside. Saltine’s eyes were focused on Rarity. The stallion picked up his bottle of cider and downed the rest of the contents. Almost half a bottle.
“See here you…I know my accent isn’t as refined as your little Canterlot wannabe crap, but I am not some country hick. I love my wife very much, but that’s because it’s supposed to be that way. She’s a mare, and I’m a stallion. One hand washes the other. Your friend, Rainbow Dash obviously hasn’t found the right stallion to settle down with. Nature dictates these things. Our ideal partners of the opposite sex are appealing to our emotions and senses so that we’ll want to reproduce with them.”
“Just what’re ya sayin’?” Applejack asked slowly in a threatening tone, eyes narrowing.
“What I’m saying, is that no damned filly fooler is capable of loving your friend Rainbow Dash the way a stallion would!”
The eyes of Applejack, Rarity, and Twilight (Pinkie had passed out at this point) focused on Fluttershy, and were shocked at what they saw. The pink-maned pegasus was not sweating profusely or breaking down into tears over the hideous things her own flesh and blood was spewing out, no, far from it. Fluttershy was remaining completely stoic, quietly sipping her cider.
She had probably prepared herself for this.
“That’s it boy, you’ve had too much drink. Get your ass to sleep.” Saltlick chided to his son, who at this point was losing some of his balance.
“I’ll take him to the guest room.” Foxy announced as she grabbed her husband to support him. The white-maned earth pony looked toward Rarity with shame in her eyes.
“Rarity, I’m so sorry about that. I shouldn’t have let him drink so much. Am I still welcome to visit your shop tomorrow?”
Rarity’s anger subsided at the humble apology of the former pop starlet.
“Of course, darling. Somepony as lovely and affable as you is always welcome at Carousel Boutique.”
Foxy blushed as she escorted her drunken husband, exiting into the guest room to let him pass out in peace.
Twilight sighed as she got out of her seat and levitated the passed out Pinkie Pie and Spike, using her remaining magic to open the front door.
“I guess we’ll show ourselves out.” The lavender sighed in a defeated tone as she made her way to the front door. As she walked out, she took one last look at Fluttershy, who turned her head away in shame. Rarity and Applejack soon followed Twilight.
As the group exited, Saltlick called out, “I’m so sorry about that, everypony. My boy can’t hold his cider gracefully.”
The door slammed shut without response.
“Who’s the worst friend in the world? Ooh I know, this pony!” Rarity theatrically exclaimed as she pointed to herself. The three were making their ways back to their respective homes in the dead of night.
“Rarity, knock it off. Nopony’s blamin’ ya for what happened. Bad ponies will say bad things, and it don’t matter the circumstance.” Applejack assured her friend as they walked side by side behind Twilight, who was still holding Pinkie and Spike mid-air with levitation.
“Even still, Fluttershy tried to tell me this would happen, and I didn’t listen. She warned me this would happen, and I didn’t listen. It’s Canterlot over again! Only, this time, instead of all of us not believing in one of our best friends, it was just me! No question about it, I deserve only the harshest words from everypony.”
Twilight turned her head back at her fellow unicorn. “Rarity, please don’t beat yourself up about this. Only Spike and Applejack had any immediate suspicions about Fluttershy’s family not being accepting, and it was only until before we got here I started to have my doubts. You were just trying to do the right thing, and Fluttershy understands that.”
Rarity sighed. “I suppose, but I just simply feel so awful about this dreadful night.”
“We all do sugarcube. Best we get some shut eye and try to approach this situation with clearer heads later.”
“AJ’s right, Rarity. We all just need to put this night behind us. We’ll have plenty of time to deal with Fluttershy’s issues when our heads aren't filled with cider.”
Everypony made it back to their respective homes, hoping that the worst of this situation was over.
To quote Huey Freeman, “Hope is irrational.”