Ponyville / The Crew / Sunday, 10:00 AM

"Well, fuck." I said to myself. Today was meant to be just a normal day in Ponyville, until this new unicorn came into town.

"The Great and Powerful Trixie has made her return to Ponyville! I am also here to seek revenge on the pony who showed me up last time! Twilight Sparkle!" She looked upset. She was also after Twilight, so I turned into Lightning and teleported into her home, without her knowing that I did so in the first place.

"Well, that was rude..." She said, she was in the middle of sipping her tea, until I made her spill it on to herself.

"Twilight! This is important! This unicorn came into town, and says she's gonna seek revenge on you!" I rushed her, she had a lot to take in.

"Is she a light blue color?" She asked, I nodded, also saying that she had a cape. She was stunned, telling me what had went down last time. Twilight took on a baby Ursa Minor? That's just crazy, but I took her word for it. Anyways, Twilight was hiding under the table, was this Trixie pony that big of a deal?

"What's wrong Twi? Is one of the best unicorns around afraid of showing up somepony they showed up before?" I mocked, she nodded. I wasn't really expecting an answer, these ponies don't really get my sarcasm at all. I know I had to do something to motivate Twilight, so I had to make something up.

"Y'know, if you show up Trixie once again, I might be able to hook you up with Jhon~." I said, she got out from under the table and whizzed out the door. I knew she had a crush on Jhon, and Jhon had feelings for Twilight as well, and I felt happy for them. Once I got out the door I went to go find Jhon, he was napping on one of the clouds above Ponyville.

"Hey Jhon, y'know how you kind of like Twilight, right?" I started to tell him slowly, he nodded.

"Yeah...What about it?" He started, I told him about what went on earlier.

"YOU TOLD HER?!" I was cracking up laughing, he was pissed at me though. He chased me around the clouds for a little bit until he pinned me down on one of them.

"Hey, I only did it to get her out of her house to get rid of Trixie, she was pissing me off. Stupid Bitch." I drifted off topic. Jhon understood the situation. I went back down to the ground to only see Trixie running away, crying. I also saw Twilight trotting over here without a care in the world.

"I see you've accomplished your mission, now about Jhon..." I placed my hand under my chin, I had told her about Jhon liking her as well, I think they would be a good match up too.

"Yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay yay." She started jumping around me, I was starting to get looks from the ponies in town, which was another 'Fuck me' moment.

"Now, I'll go get Jhon. You stay here." It didn't feel right with me playing match maker, but I'll do whatever to make my friends happy. I pulled Jhon out of the sky using my telekinesis, pulling him towards me and Twilight.

"Hey, uhmm, Twilight. Do you think you want to go out sometime?" Jhon asked. Twilight nodded in excitement, I don't think she ever had a coltfriend before. Jhon had many girlfriends before, he was always one of those guys who got a lot of attention. I let them do their own thing, since it wasn't any of my business anyway.

"*zzzt* Delta 0-1, come in Delta 0-1. Do you copy?" Overlord was on the radio, I knew when he called it was never good.

"You have two Manticores and an Ursa Major closing in on Ponyville, I recommend you suit up." He announced, this was another one of those 'Fuck me' moments. This didn't look too important, so I just had Nick with me to deal with them.

"You ready Nick? Better bring some of your hollow point rounds." Manticores and Ursa Majors don't have any armor, so to put them down quicker we were gonna use our hollow point rounds. I only brough Goldie with me, while Nick brought his .44, all chambered with hollow point rounds. I know Fluttershy wasn't going to approve, but she didn't have to find out about it anyways, we were still deep in the Everfree Forest, nopony came out this far anyway. Once we encountered the hostiles, it was more than a search and destroy mission. These monsters were being controlled by something, something ominous. I didn't know what it was, but we have to either put them out of their misery, or destroy the mind control devices. I decided to go with the second one, because Fluttershy would get on my ass about 'killing other creatures is wrong'.

"Nick, go for those things that are on their heads." I announced, they all got closer as we aimed carefully to the antennae sticking out of their head. We managed to shoot off the things off of the Manticores, but the one controlling the Ursa didn't even budge.

"Damn! Bullet Proof, should've known." I said, reloading Goldie in the process. I then switched on Extreme Conditioning Pro and started to scale the Ursa at a fast pace. I only used my perks when I'm in deep need of them, and if I don't forget to use them. I then tried to rip off the mind controlling device, and it managed only to enrage the Ursa even further, this thing will not come off! I had to do the next best thing, I had to put it down, out of its misery. I then placed a C-4 on top of the mind controlling device, and then turned on Dead Silence Pro. I then jumped off the Ursa Major and landed on the ground, taking no fall damage. When I detonated the C-4, the Ursa cried out in pain as the device blew up, killing the Ursa with it.

"Well, that takes care of that." Nick said, wiping sweat from his face. I wiped the blood from my mouth, walking back to Ponyville. Nick readied a molotov and set the Ursa corpse on fire, leaving no evidence of our encounter, he also used his unicorn magic to clean up the rest of it.

"Nick c'mon, we still need to patrol the rest of Ponyville!" I said, rushing back to Ponyville, I turned on Marathon while Nick was still cleaning up. He had turned on Lightweight and Marathon so he could catch up to me, and we both made our way into Ponyville. I saw Jhon and Twilight walk up to me, probably gonna ask me why I'm covered in dirt and shit.

"Hey Drew, hey Nick. Why do you guys look like you've been in the grinder?" Jhon came up to me and asked, I didn't answer his question and changed the subject.

"So Jhon, how's it going with Twilight?" I asked him, nudging him in the arm. He whispered in my ear, "Thanks for hooking us up Drew! Twilight's awesome, she's not as boring as Rainbow said she is." He replied, I looked over to Twilight seeing her blush, she probably knew we were talking about her. Then out of nowhere Rainbow tackled me to the ground.

"Wow Drew, you look like crap!" She exclaimed, was everypony gonna make fun of me being covered in shit? Nick just laughed at me, turns out he was squeaky clean. I went back to my house, with it being a few minutes away, with Rainbow tailing me from behind.

"Uhmm Rainbow? Why are you following me?" I asked, she hesitated.

"I don't know. I was bored so that's why I'm following you." She shrugged, I told her that I was going home to take a shower, she blushed and flew away, lolz. Once I was at my house, I put my clothes into the washing machine, they were electronic, but they're washable too. I love 22nd century technology, it just can't get any better, until the next century goes by at least, where it gets even better. I then stepped into the bathroom, about to take a nice shower, I hadn't showered in a while, at least a few days at the most. I hate being all dirty and grimy, my hair gets all oily and shit, that's the shit I don't like. Even though I'm in the Delta Force, I can tolerate dirt and dust, but when it comes to my hair getting oily, my skin gets oily, and sweat makes my skin feel grimy, that's the shit I don't like. Once I came out of the shower, my clothes were gone! I wrapped the towel around my waist and went to go find them. Only for Nick to rip off my towel from my waist as well, I should've known it was Nick, he was the prankster of the group. I them covered my privates Metal Gear Solid 2 style and went out the door, chasing Nick while I was naked. I didn't have a choice because today was laundry day, all of my clothes were being washed this very instant. This was another one of those 'Oh fuck me' moments today. I really wasn't having a very good day today was I? To make matters worse Nick went inside of Sugercube Corner during my chase, and Pinkie Pie was on the floor, dying of laughter.

"HAHAHAHAHA *snort* DREW'S NAKED! HAHAHAHAHAHA *snort*." Haha Pinkie, real mature. I then gave chase to Nick out the back door, heading his way to Twilight's house, oh god. I drew the line there, I wasn't going into Twilight's house. I just went home, with everypony in town looking at me do my walk of shame, butt naked. I really had no sense of shame, but I didn't want to mentally traumatize Twilight. Pinkie, I don't know what's up with her, but I guess since ponies here always run around naked it was fine for her. Twilight on the other hand was very secluded from everypony else, only hanging out with the princesses, her brother and sister in law, and her six friends. I just waited for my other set of clothes to dry so I could wear those, and then Nick came in, laughing his ass off.

"Haha Nick, you got me there." I said with hostility in my voice, I was pissed at him though, very, very pissed. I then put my vest back on and turned on Juggernaut, Flak Jacket, and Blast Shield, my three perks that gives me extra strength, and picked Nick up and dropped him to the ground, making him cough violently. He was my jokester friend though, so I decided he had enough, and turned off all perks, all while going to get a bottle of Nuka-Cola. This is pretty much what happened the whole day, so now I'm going to bed, I was fucking TI-RED! Rainbow came home, and slipped into bed with me, as we both kept our part of the bed this time, and went to sleep. Today was rather, random for me to say the least, and hopefully my day will be better tomorrow.