me? that is...expected. i am the strongest one here. doesn't matter what anyone else says. i am. anyway, i'm spike, creator of all.

hey, do you wanna hear my mixtape?

[I like to imagine Neal having a Stolas Personality]

"GGAAAAHHH!" A Pony yelled as she was covered in the hot liquid oozing out of the ground.

"SOMEONE HELP ME!" More Ponies yelled, as the rescuers tried to pull them out of the strange liquid. This pony in particular, named Leif Magik, was a magical apprentice. She was trying to perform a spell to create super fast growing soil, but ended up causing this. Now, she was trapped in her own creatio-oh. Nevermind she's dead. Yeah, hey this girl's dead!

"OH BUCK SOMEONE HELP ME!" Leif Magik yelled one more time, before suddenly, everything went a bright white, and she appeared in a blue and white area, with light shining down on her.

"Wh-What the?" Leif said, before a giant light appeared in front of her. From it emerged a sight to see indeed. It looked like a dragon she had seen before, purple and green, with spines on his back, also green, and wearing a strange multi-colored robe.

"Yo!" The dragon said to her.

"Wha...Who are you?" Leif asked. The dragon laughed.

"I'm god, you banana head!" The dragon said, chuckling. Leif was confused.

"God? Who's god?" Leif asked. The dragon stopped for a minute.

"Oh yeah, right. Religion isn't exactly a thing anymore. Well, anyway, I'm spike, nice to meet you, and I'm the creator of everything," The dragon, now known as spike, told her.

"Wait, your creator of everything?" Leif asked.

"Yep!" Spike said.

"So...you can do anything?" Leif asked.

"Pretty much yeah," Spike explained.

"Well, look at what happened!" Leif said. Spike laughed again.

"Yeah, I know. I did that. It's a liquid obsidian flood. Heh, your crazy for this one spike!" Spike said to himself. Leif was confused.

"Wait, why?" Leif asked.

"I don't know, I'm a little freak! I can do anything I want!" Spike said, praising himself. Leif was now angry.

"Well, can you get me out of this Obsidian than?" Leif shouted.

"Oh, no. Oh...yea, no," Spike said.

"What? I, I think I'm gonna die!" Leif said.

"Oh, no no no, your already dead," Spike explained.

"WHAT!?" Leif yelled.

"Yeah, I know, it's a hard transition. Just come with me to the light and we can get you to equine heaven, or equine hell, if you were like, an equine biggin or something," Spike explained, motioning to the light pillar.

"Wha...But there's so much I wanted to do!" Leif said, trying to grapple with her demise.

"mm, yeah," Spike said.

"I, I wanted to become a great spell master. Oh I loved learning!" Leif cried out.

"Hey I invented Spells! and Learning!" Spike shouted.

"Oh I just wanted to see my girlfriend Cellulous. She...She was so smart!" Leif said.

"Really?" Spike said, creating a small window into reality. "A Handsome gal! Big, uh, big brains...yeah..." Spike said, quickly dissipating the window.

"I...I just...I just want to live one more day..." Leif said, now crying.

"Ok, well it seems we're gonna have some problems with this, so just come along, follow me and let's see if we can get you acquainted with your burning demise," Spike started.

"I hate to tell you, my fine equine,
But it's looking like your number's up!

I know you'd love to stay around
just a little bit longer,
But you body's full of burning rock!

So Take a gallop with me,
Towards Eternity.
Forget about your Terrific Plight!

Just put one hoof
in front of the other,
in front of the other,
in front of the other,

And Clip Clop into the light!"

"But I'm gonna miss my friends and family, and they'll miss me!" Leif protested.

"Were they ponies who also lived near you in Ponyville?" Spike asked.

"Uhh, yeah?" Leif answered.

"Oh, then they're toast!" Spike asnwered!

"Wait, what?" Leif asked.

"Yeah, I got like 36 more equines waiting on you, so chances are some of them are someone you know!" Spike answered.

"Oh. Well then...

I hope my girls died too,
So I can see them soon!"

"You Will!"

"And so I can confess
to my girlfriend and
maybe even wife!"

"Ok?"

"Then I can stare into her gorgeous,
Blue colored pupils as we
drift into the vast abyss!"

"Yeah!"

"I Guess I'm (You're) ready to go,
into the great unknown,
It's been a lovely horsey Life!

I'll (You'll) put one hoof
In front of the other,
In front of the other
In front of the other!

And Clip Clop into the Light!"

As the song was finished, leif was starting to transfer into the next life.

"Also, where am I going?" Leif asked.

"Uhh, let me check real quick," Spike said, pulling out a scroll. "Ah, ok, your going to hell!"

"WHAT!?" Leif shouted.

"Well, you literally cause a burning obsidian flood to occur, so yeah," spike said.

"You said You did that!" leif angrily shouted.

"Yeah, but you can't blame god. That's now how it works," Spike said. Leif's angry stares got to him though. "Alright, Alright fine, I'll see what I can do to get you into at least peaceful heaven. It might be a little bit, but in the meantime, enjoy hell!" Spike said, disappearing Leif into a fiery blast.

Meanwhile, in the crystal empire, during a visit from the mane 6, everyone started...dancing?

"uh, girls? What happened?" Cadence asked, seeing this for the first time. Everyone was just dancing in the bottom of the tower.

"I don't know Cadence. They just won't really stop. We tried tripping and a bunch of other stuff, they just get back up," Twilight said.

"Think it was discord? This is usually his calling card," Rainbow Dash said, as a pony walked by. This pony wasn't dancing. Strange.

"Who was that?" Rainbow Asked, taking in this pony. He had a brown hat, grey skin, blue shirt and darker blue pants. He also had an exceptionally wide grin.

"Oh that's Dale. Not sure what he's doing here though. I've never seen him leave his cabin," Pinkie Pie explained. "He's a little freaky."

"No kidding. The dude looks like he just got revealed at royalty. How does his jaw even go that far?" Twilight questioned. "How did he even get up here?" Twilight continued as suddenly a bus stop appeared, with a bus soon after, having discord coming out of the door.

"Thank you! Now what was this about me?" Discord said, waving to the bus driver, who drove off the balcony.

"Uh...Nevermind. Did you make those guys dance?" Rainbow Dash asked. Discord's eyebrow raised, and they all went down to the epicenter. Discord looked around confused, and then laughed.

"This is hilarious. What's wrong here?" Discord asked.

"They've been dancing ever since we got here," Twilight answered.

"and how long has that been?" Discord asked.

"Like, 2 hours. They just won't stop," Pinkie Pie said, trying to wave her hoof in someone else's face.

"I'm sure that they're just happy to see you all," Discord told them, summoning some tea. Everyone looked at him sternly. "Fine, Fine, if you really that against dancing, I'll make them stop!" Discord said, getting his snapping fingers ready. He snapped...and nothing happened.

"Huh, that's weird," Discord said.

"What wrong?" Rarity asked.

"It's not working. Hold on..." Discord said, looking at one of the afflicted. He then grinned...and laughed...laughed a terrific laugh. "Oh...Oh good one Spike! Bravo!" Discord clapped.

"What is he talking about? Spike?" Rainbow asked, looking at discord weirdly.

"Yeah, I know who did this," Discord said, looking up to the sky.

"Well, who did it then?" Twilight asked.

"Well...God," Discord said. It was silence for a while.

"What? You mean, like something like you? A god of dancing or something?" Rainbow asked. Discord shook his head.

"No. I mean god of literally everything," Discord said, looking up at the sky again.

"Why are you looking up there, and who is god of everything? I wanna have a word with him!" AJ said.

"No, no you don't. But anyway, I'm looking up, cause he's up there," Discord said, pointing up.

"What do you mean, like, he's in the clouds of something?" Rainbow asked.

"No. He's far, far past the clouds...watching everything," Discord said.

"Like, he's omnipotent or something?" Twilight asked.

"Exactly," Discord answered.

"Well, can you get him to stop?" Twilight asked.

"Hold on," Discord said, creating a rotary phone, and dialing, "1-800-60D-C001," he laughed. "Still hasn't changed that."

Suddenly, a massive flash of light appeared in front of the ponies and the dragonequis. As the light dimmed, they looked at where the light once was...and saw a dragon, almost the size of discord.

"Who called me- Hey discord!" The dragon said, as he ran over to discord, discord doing the same. They then performed a very complex system of handshakes and movements until the fist bumped.

"Hah! I can't believe you still remember that!" The dragon said, smiling.

"Of course I do spike. Can't have a fellow god be disappointed in me!" Discord says, hugging the dragon, now known as spike.

"Uhh...discord?" Twilight tried to get discord's attention.

"Oh, sorry girls. This is Spike, also known as, God!" Discord introduced spike, spike displaying himself.

"I would be humble and say, 'not exactly,' but that would be a lie," Spike said.

"So...by god...you mean...?" Cadence said, waving her hoof. Spike raised an eyebrow at discord.

"Is religion just not a thing anymore?" Spike asked discord.

"Other than some small areas, not really. No one believes in one pure or true god or anything," Discord explained. Spike grabbed his face.

"Ok...how do I explain this..." Spike said. "Basically, you all know how this world came to be?"

"Yeah? The big Bang?" Twilight asked.

"Yeah...about that. That's total bogus," Spike said.

"Wha-What?" Twilight stuttered. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I should know how this world, nay, this universe came to be. I created it afterall," Spike said, getting shocked responses from everyone.

"So...hold on...I-I need to process this," Twilight said.

"Yeah, no problem!" Spike said, summoning a bag of jelly beans.

"Really? Those?" Discord asked.

"What? Ever since the blue puppet threw one at me, I came to love em!" Spike said, popping some inside his mouth.

"So...So...You...You! You Created...Everything?" Fluttershy asked.

"Eh, about like, 77% yea," Spike said, moving his hands 90 Degrees repeatedly.

"Wha...Wait, how can you prove that?" Rainbow said, pointing an accusing hoof at spike. Spike sighed, snapped his claws, and suddenly, all of them started to fly.

"Woah Woah Woah!" Shining Armor said, falling on his side.

"That enough for you?" Spike asked, snapping his claws again as rainbow nodded. They were suddenly back on the ground.

"So...who made the other like, 23% than?" Pinkie asked. "Was it all discord, or did it come naturally? Oh, is there a god of parties! Can I be a God? I would totally be the best God of Parties!"

'She always like this?' Spike said to twilight, through a mental connection.

"Uhh...yeah?" Twilight responded. Spike nodded, but everyone - discord thought that twilight was responding to pinkie.

"See! Even Twily thinks I'd be a great god!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Uh, well, maybe, but-" Twilight got cut off.

"Ok, this has been nice, but can we get to the topic? Spike, why'd you make these ponies dance!?" AJ accused Spike.

"Huh? Oh, I didn't even notice the jitterbugs around here," Spike said, looking at the ponies.

"Wait, you didn't know?" Twilight asked.

"Well, let me explain in song!" Spike yelled.

"...Why?" Rainbow Asked,

"I don't know. It's just some other god made it so that a song always makes something happen in this planet in particular...I think. Maybe they did it to some other planet," Spike said, looking around.

"Wait, other god? How many are there?" Rarity asked.

"Uhh...Let me get my list again. I forget," Spike said, snapping his fingers. "Ahh...around...22," Spike said.

"Woah. That's a lot of gods," AJ said.

"Run through them! I must see my Opponents!" Pinkie yipped.

"Uhh...here we go.

Spike - God of All - Genderless
Discord - God of Chaos (And Friendship recently) - Male
Neave - God of Flesh and Creatures - Female
Nexus - God of Technology and Interaction - Male
Neal - God of Entertainment and Parties - Male
Damien - God of Writing and Intelligence - Male
Defena - God of Harmony and Music - Female
Robin - God of Wrath and Sex - Male
Darwin - God of Sea and Sky - Genderless
Quirel - God of Exploration - Male
Brennan - God of Wisdom and Magic - Male
Tiberius - God of Darkness and Death - Male
Monik - God of Love and Life - Female
Annie - God of Liquids and Strength - Female
Essence - God of Space and Light - Female
Dave - God of Sanity and Architecture - Male
Zard - God of Agriculture and Mystery - Male
Alex - God of Nothing - Female
Jaren - God of Humor and Politeness - Male
Zack & Maria - Gods of Siblings and Family - Male and Female Respectively
Supernovae - God of Pure Destruction and Creation - Female"

"Jeez. Why are there so many?" Twilight asked.

"Well, I created all of them, and it was mainly cause, either I was just bored, or needed some way to help myself in controlling this universe," Spike explained, as pinkie started to yell.

"I...MUST...MEET...NEAL!" Pinkie screamed, shaking Spike.

"WOah! WoAh! WoAH!" Spike yelled. "Calm DoWn! I'll call him up! Jeez!" Spike produced a Rotary Phone, Dialing the numbers, "999-956-6234." Suddenly, a Massive Party hat fell from the sky as a door appeared on the side of it.

"Who called the Party Maker?" A Creature best described as a human with a pony head said as they opened the door. He was covered in confetti, wearing a golden jacket covered in miniature gemstones. He had an emerald Fedora that glimmered alongside the entire empire, with a pair of rainbow colored Pants, and full on cement shoes. Pinkie...was...ecstatic.

"WOWIE! I knew the god of parties would look incredible, BUT I DIDN'T KNOW THEY'D LOOK LIKE PURE HAPPINESS!" Pinkie said, zipping towards the dude. "ARE YOU NEAL, GOD OF PARTIES!?"

"Well, god of Entertainment and Parties, but yes my dear. I also go by the Party Maker! Now, who called me?" Neal said, looking around for his caller.

"Hey Neal! How's it going?" Discord said, walking towards neal.

"My Boy! Discord! How's it going?" Neal asked, brofisting Discord.

"Chaos as usual. Nothing huge has happened recently," Discord said.

"Well, that's nice. Did you call me here?" Neal asked, taking of his pixelated Sunglasses.

"No. The person who called you is currently standing near the door you just swung in his face," Discord said, pointing towards spike on the floor.

"Could've been a little more gentle there Neal," Spike said.

"Oh, sorry bout that spike. But you must remember..." Neal Started

"The god of Parties must always make an entrance!" Neal and spike said, spike being very unenthusiastic.

"Yeah, Yeah, I remember from the last time you bumped my nose with the clock entrance. Why did it have to have 48 hours, by the way? You never answered that!" Spike asked, kinda angrilly.

"Well, More numbers," Neal said, nonchalantly. "Now, is there any party here?"

"Well, I guess you could call an eternal dance a party, in the right circumstances," Twilight said, breaking the convo.

"An eternal- Oh my! This is certainly a dance. Look at the lovely couples!" Neal said, pointing towards many ponies dancing together.

"Yeah, Yeah, and these ponies think I did it," Spike said.

"Well, Did you?" Neal asked.

"NO!" Spike yelled. "In fact, before you even came, I was about to sing my innocence away!"

"OOH! Should we call up Defena?" Neal smiled.

"What!?" Spike screamed.

"Already on it dude!" Discord said, pulling out the rotary phone again. "670-576-7081," Discord put into the phone, Spike protesting the entire time.

"Darling, What's wrong with Defena?" Rarity asked spike, who was very deflated.

"Nothing's wrong, it's just that I don't like so many of us supernatural beings being in one mortal area. It just makes me uncomfortable," Spike said, finally looking at the pearl Marsh-mellow pony in front of him. "You know, I'm glad I made you. You're pretty and nice," Spike said.

"Well Thank- Wait WHAT?" Rarity bursted out. "You Made ME?"

"I Mean, technically. You'll probably learn about it later," Spike said, swirling his finger. Suddenly, a Massive star came from the sky, radiant and blinding to anyone who saw it. The Light dimmed as the star formed into a similar shape to Neal.

"Yo-Yo! God of Music in the Houze!" The new creature said. This creature was wearing a Newsboy Cap with headphones underneath, glowing in a multitude of colors. This creature was also wearing a glowing t-shirt and Pure black jacket, a Disco skirt with Glowing green pants underneath, and neon lights on the bottom of the shoes. Their hair was a pinkish white, and sticking out like spikes from their hat.

"Eyo! Let's get this party started!" Neal said, walking towards The new creature. "Great to see you again defena!"

"Hey Neal! Good seeing you too! Sorry I've been so busy, Manehatten likes my beats," Defena said, using a Air Turntable.

"No Sweat! I've got plenty of requests from across equestria! I hardly ever have time to bother robin!" Neal said, tipping his hat.

"Yeah. Anyway, why am I here? I gotta get back in like 40 minutes!" Defena asked.

"Well, Spike was about to sing a song to prove his innocence, and we thought, why not get the literal god of music in here?" Neal explained.

"I can make music too! I literally made you both!" Spike protested.

"Yeah, Yeah, whatever pops," Defena said.

"POPS?" The rest of the ponies asked.

"Oh, yeah. We technically consider spike as our dad. It's a weird thing, but we don't really care," Neal said.

"Who are these cute little creatures?" Defena said, pinching Rainbow's Cheek.

"Hey! Back off Disco!" Rainbow said, pushing her hand away.

"Ooh, fiesty. Anyway, I'd love to get this show a going," Defena said, summoning an Amethyst Turntable, complete with diamond records.

"I must say, you really like your shiny stones you gods," Rarity said.

"Well, since we're gods, we have to let people know that, 'we got the drip!'" Defena said.

"Wait, why aren't Spike and discord more, like, modern, like you 2?" Rainbow asked.

"Well, I was trapped in a Stone statue for a while, but I'd say I can get modern," Discord said, summoning sunglasses, a gold chain, and a blue cap.

"No. We're not doing that again dude," Neal said, making discord turn back.

"The short answer is, some of us like being more modern, and some of us don't. However, for me and discord, He's wasn't around for the change, and I just don't care," Spike explained.

"Yep. However, me and Defena had to change in order to fit in! I can't go around throwing parties for surviving syphilis anymore, so I guess I should throw them for a promotion or Hearths warming," Neal said.

"And I can't go around playing an oud and harp anymore. Besides, Turntables are so much more fun!" Defena said, turning the records.

"Alright, get to your song," Rainbow said.

"My wha?" Spike asked.

"Your...Your song? To prove innocence or whatever?" Rainbow continued.

"Oh! Oh yea yea yea, sorry." Spike said, before transporting them all to the sky.

"Woah! What the?" Aj exclaimed.

"I figured it'd be nice to have a sort of stage. Seems like it worked," Spike said.

"Why did you even make a god of chaos when you can fit the bill perfectly?" Twilight asked.

"Well, I didn't actually mean to make discord. He just kinda came along," Spike said. "Now, where were we?"

I'm God, Okay? (He's God!) I've got something to say.
Those Dummies dancing half to death, That wasn't me! No Way!
I made the stars and moon and sun, and also I made everyone,
like Genghoof Kahn, Celine Mion, All dogs, all cats, fruit bats, your mom, (Your Mom!)
And sure, some people worship me, but then, I did make everything!
Like Jupiter, and tupperware, and Diet choke, and Teddy Bears!

But I didn't make those ponies dance,
Oh way down there in the town Square.
I'm not that guy, that's not my scene!
You think that I would be so mean?

And sure, I killed some crops for years,
and played upon some deepest fears,
like squalor, plague, no food to eat,
But dancing man? That's not my beat!

"Ok...so you didn't do it?" Rainbow asked, but before Spike could answer...

"He's lying. I can tell," AJ said. Spike was apalled.

"What? I'm god dude! Why would I want to destroy the world I made?" Spike asked.

"I don't know why, but I know your lying," AJ continued. The music continued, as spike looked down.

Eh.....Know what? I lied. It's all on me!
I brought those dingbats to their feet!
Boy they could really jitterbug,
But when they died, I pulled the Plug!

So what? Oh Celestia! Big woop! Who cares?
Come on! It's not the worst thing that I've done,
Like bedbugs, Pink eye, Tampa, Florihoof,
And also the rest of florihoof, HA!

So, yeah I made those ponies dance
Oh way down there in the town square.
I'm sorry, I know it was rude,
I guess I'm just a zany dude.

As the song ended, Spike disappeared.

"Wow..." Twilight said, as the stage they were on broke apart.

As Sunny Star-scout investigated the crystal castle, she found something strange.

"Hey izzy!" Sunny called out to her friend.

"Yeah sunny?" Izzy Moonbow said, appeared right beside her, causing sunny to jump.

"I really got to get used to that. Anyway, Do you know what this is?" Sunny said, pointing towards a rotary phone.

"Uhh...nope. No clue," Izzy said, looking around the phone.

"Hmm..." Sunny said, picking up the stick part. Suddenly, the object began to ring.

"What the? GAH! YOU RELEASED A DEMON!" Izzy shouted, running away. Sunny however, stayed. Something just, compelled her to stay and wait.

"Umm...What do I do?" Sunny said, looking at the phone. Suddenly, she noticed that certain buttons were missing. So...she tried to imput the buttons from the pistons underneath. Nothing happened. Tried again. Nothing happened. She continued trying until she put in this.

1-800-60D-C001

Suddenly, the stick produced a different ring. She put it near her ear to hear it better, but then heard a voice.

"Hello?" The voice said as sunny jumped. "Hello, Hello?"

"Uh...hi?" Sunny cautiously whispered.

"Hi!" The voice said, almost enthusiastically. "Wait, who is this?"

"Uh..." Sunny considered for a moment. She couldn't just say her name to someone she doesn't even know, but on the other hand, this could be a person from the past. She wrestled with her brain for a little bit.

"Uhh...hello?" The voice said again.

"Oh, sorry, uh, this is Sunny Starscout," Sunny whispered.

"Oh you!" The voice said, as sunny jumped again. She wasn't that famous yet...was she? No one was even living here, so how could whoever this is know who she is?

"Umm...Can I get a name back?" Sunny whispered.

"Why are we whispering?" The voice said quietly.

"Oh...I...Don't know," Sunny said, still on edge.

"Fair enough. Well, I'm Spike!" The voice, now identified as Spike, said through the stick.

"Umm...are you...inside this thing?" Sunny asked, looking at the phone.

"Huh? Oh, you mean the god phone?" Spike asked, making sunny more confused. "No, no, I'm not inside the thing, thank me."

"Wait...god phone?" Sunny asked. "As in the being that sees all and interferes to protect from evil?"

"No, not that one. The jerk one," Spike said.

"Oh...wait what? Wait, why is it even called the God phone anyway?" Sunny asked as Spike laughed.

"Well, I mean, it's a direct line to god...and...your talking to someone...on a direct line to god...so..." Spike said. Sunny didn't get it.

"So...If this is a line to god, why am I talking to you?" Sunny asked.

"Hmm...Let me think. The god phone is supposed to be a direct line to god, and only god can answer the god phone...and this weird dude is talking to me now...so...hmm..." Spike taunted her as she figured it out.

"Wait wait wait...you...you are...god?" Sunny asked.

"Bingo was his name-o!" Spike said through the phone.

"Oh..uhh...oh gosh this is...this is unprecedented...uhh..." Sunny panicked. She was literally talking to god. Tell me you wouldn't be panicking if you met creator of the universe.

"Don't worry, I ain't doing nothin...wait...how did you even get access to the god phone anyway? Twilight should've had it under lock and key like that bank in harry Potter or something," Spike questioned.

"Huh? Who's twilight?" Sunny asked. Spike let out a spit take.

"Wait...what year is it?" Spike asked.

"About 2000. Why?" Sunny asked.

"Oh...well that explains, wait no it doesn't. Well...it kinda does...oh boy. Well, I guess I god now bestow upon you, Sunny starscout, the god phone, cause I got not one else I know who should have it," Spike said.

"Wait...your just giving it to me?" Sunny asked, apalled.

"Yeah, sure dude. Whatever. Oh, hold on I gotta go. Damien needs a stack real quick. Call me anytime, except on Tuesdays and Thursdays between 7 and 8," Spike said as the phone went dead.

"What the Flozwad."