Anonymous no longer likes women. As far as he was concerned they could all get bent.

‘Why does he dislike women?’ You may ask?

Well, it’s because he’s a mares man now.

After Celestia had essentially proclaimed her deep seated desire to bone him, he’s never been the same since.

The moments that followed after the throne room were magical.

They cuddled. Like, a fucking lot of cuddling. ‘Twas sweet and tender, then they ate dinner and drank wine and all that cool stuff.

Oh yeah, then they fucked. Right, can’t forget that part.

‘Twas also very sweet and tender, they even did lots of kissy stuff. But the kissy stuff was shortly followed by the bite-y stuff so maybe not so tender in the end.

Overall, Anon would probably loudly exclaim how ‘epic’ it was to bone the hottie of his dreams, but he can’t right now; for he is smothered in his princess girlfriend’s massive chest fluff.

“Hrng, floofer...” Anon mumbled.

Honestly. With how much bliss he was in, he was thinking about popping the question then and there, but he abstained.

Celestia hummed. “Oh dear, I didn’t end up screwing a few bolts loose this time did I?” She giggled.

The two of them lay in the afterglow of one of their steamy bedroom sessions, Anon in his boxers, and Celestia without her regalia. They’d been dating for about a week as of the current snuggle time, and for Anon, it was the best week of his life. He
adjusted himself a little before yawning. “Ugh, you always leave me feeling loose, baby.”

“For your information dear, you are very tight.”

Anon nodded, which caused Celestia to giggle at the sensation. “What can I say? Me and da boys always keep it at a hundred.”

“Not the kind of ‘tight’ I meant.”

“Whata yah mean? I’m tight as fuck.” Anon yawned again. “Gang gang.” He whispered lethargically.

Celestia chuckled before leaning down to nuzzle the top of Anon’s head. “Yes dear. ‘Gang gang.’ Now who’s my tight little human?~” She cooed.

“...Why do I get the feelin’ that you’re not talkin’ about what I’m takin’ about?”

She just giggled.

Anon scoffed, shaking his head. Which just tickled Celestia some more. “Next your gonna tell me that the G-spot isn’t were the homies hang out.” He mumbled before twisting over so his back was against her tummy. “Hey, isn’t that uncomfy? Laying down on your back like that?”

She hummed, “Oh no, I’m quite flexible.”

“Isn’t that the truth.” Anon blinked as Celestia leaned over into his cone of vision, she was deciding to just stare at him with a smirk. “...Uh, hi?”

“Hello, dear.”

“...You uh, got a reason for acting weird, Big C?”

She huffed. “What? Can’t I look at the person I love?”

“Only psychopaths maintain eye contact without blinking for more than fifteen seconds.”

She rolled her eyes before leaning down to give him a smooch on the nose. “You’re silly.” She said as she pushed him slightly by adjusting positions to lay on her side, giving both of them some breathing room.

“Pffft. I’m not silly. I’m the frickin’ bomb. Your man’s a bonafide badass!”

His waifu smiled and draped a wing over him to continue snogging. “I don’t know about all that. But I will say, you definitely have a bomb ass.” She gave him a husky whisper, chuckling as he averted his eyes.

He coughed, his face only slightly pink.

“...The things you do to me, lady.”

She let out a harrumph. “I let you do things to me all the time, I think that would warrant some light peddling, wouldn’t you agree? Dearest?~”

“Stop that.”

“Hmm, stop what?~” She purred, the sound coming out thick and sultry.

“That. Stop speaking in your horny voice.”

“Well, what if I am horny?” She pouted.

“Hah! We’re alone right now and you could sex me at any moment! You only talk like this if you can’t boink me in that point in time, or you’re trying to tease me. Check mate, Princess!”

She rolled her eyes once more. “Pffft. You think i wouldn’t take you then and there in public if I could? *tsk tsk tsk* I only abstain to keep the innocence of my little ponies intact.”

Anon rolled his eyes this time, running his fingers through the feathers of her wing. “Can’t let them see the monkey dicking down their favourite princess, eh?”

She nodded. “Mhmm. Plus, I’d rather your maleness be kept a... ‘state secret.’ Let the noble mares froth at the mouth at the thought of never knowing.”

“Woah. I got nobles wanting my glizzy?”

“If ‘your glizzy’ means ‘your cock’ then yes. But most likely only because you have managed to enter a relationship with me. I heard rumours that they wish to see the rod that has... ‘tamed me’. I suppose they think I’m so shallow as to base a relationship on physical attraction alone.” She scoffed.

Anon shrugged. “Well... you kinda did screw me on the first date.”

Celestia smiled wide and gave a condescending raise of an eyebrow.
“If I remember correctly, you were the one who came into my court and proclaimed your desire to buck me. Before you even asked me on a date, no less.”

“...Shut up.”

She sighed happily and gave him another smooch, this time on his lips. “*MWAH!* Well, all’s well that ends well. And I mean, how long had we been friends before you came that day?—don’t look at me like that, that is not what I meant—Ten months? A year? I believe we just settled for what was long overdue anyways, dearest.”

Anon sighed dreamily. “I love it when you call me that. Gives you big milf energy.”

She cocked her head at him. “You mean... ‘Dearest?’ Hmmm. I shall make a note to continue calling you that in the future. Now, what is this... ‘big milf energy’ you speak of?”

He shrugged. “Milf stands for ‘mom I’d like to fuck’.”

A light frown crossed her lips. “I’m not that old, am I?”

Anon shook his head. “Nah. I’m saying It means you’re a mommy. Guys love mommies, especially if they’re the above thirty kind. If anything, you’re the final milf boss to all of the milfs around the universe.” He sighed. “The boys back home would be soooo jealous.”

Celestia giggled. “The final Milf boss... Well, I suppose I have been called worse.”

“Yeah. But you’re my final milf boss, no one else’s.” Anon crossed his arms, a determined look in his eyes.

Celestia nodded, a serious look on her face. “No one else’s.”

Anon pointed at her, his finger booping her snout. “And don’t you forget it!”

Celestia’s eyes went cross as they focused on his finger, before her face took on a scandalous look; her soft smile turning into lecherous grin as her eyes drifted down to his. Anon raised a quizzical eyebrow towards her intense stare.

“...What?”

Maintaining eye contact, Celestia opened her maw slowly, making sure the imagery of his finger sliding on top of her tongue as her head moved forward, burned into his brain permanently; before clamping her lips down and giving his finger a few light suckles. Anon stiffened at both the warmth and wetness of her tongue, his eyes quickly locking onto her lips once they began to glisten with salvia as she began to purposely pull her head back slightly, allowing a small bit of drool to leave her mouth. Her eyes closing halfway as her grin softened to seductive smirk.

She let out a cute giggle.

Anon could feel a jolt of cold sweat form on his brow, an awkward smile arriving on his lips as a she continued to suck.

“...R-really? Didn’t we just finish bumping uglies?”

Celestia hummed in thought, though it was probably more of a moan from Anon’s point of view. Her eyes closed and she let go of his finger with a *pop* causing the poor human to shudder. She sighed breathily, leaning down to mumble in his ear. “Well what if I want to go again?”

“...it’s kinda late, don’t you have work tomorrow?”

She withdrew her wing and she shifted.

“Hmmm, tomorrows Sunday. I can afford to stay up a little late.”

Anon gulped as she lifted herself up and deposited her rump in his lap, giving it a little wiggle as she eyed him with that saucy look again.

”Come on Dearest~ Let mommy take care of you.~” She purred, lowering her face to nip at his ear.

Anon stuttered in his groan as the princess breathed against his nape.

“N-no fair, you’re utilizing my fetishes against me!” He squirmed, which only caused more friction between them.

“Hmpf. Says the one who plays with my wings while I’m trying to focus on court proceedings.” She gasped at his squirming. “Annie~“

“That was an accident!”

“Then make it up to me, sweetie.~”

Anon crossed his arms, harrumphing before titling his head away like a child. “Only if you buy me ice cream in the morning!”

“Of course dearest—“ She gives pause to kiss his chin. “—I’ll buy us both some ice cream. Mother knows I’ll need something a little extra to cool me down when out and about, can’t let my hoofs wander in public now can we? You little temptation.~”

“Hey! It’s not my fault I’m so sexy!”

Anon groaned as she gave him an abrupt hump.

She huffed. “Shhh, less talking, more sexy times.”

Anon sighed as if he was being told to do something he hated. Though it was obviously fake, he just liked getting a rise out of Celestia; lord knows he couldn’t flirt for shit when it came to trying to raise her hackles. It only turned her on more.

He grabbed her by her luscious bottom, giving it a squeeze. Her smile widened to show a toothy grin once Anon sighed once more, complete with another eye roll.

She giggled as Anon eyed her cutie marks with a lewd gaze.

“Fine, I guess I will. But only because if I don’t, you’ll be fondling me all day.”

“Finally!~” She pulled herself off of his lap and away from his fingers, which made Anon instantly aware of how much he hated when her tush wasn’t there. “Now we can start.“ She practically growled as she leaned down and grabbed the waistline of his boxers with her teeth, her hooves settling beside his hips.

He had to admit, the view of her leaning down and sticking her butt up in the air was a nice alternative to her sitting in his lap.

Her tail gave a cute little happy flick.

God, his horniness levels were through the roof.

“Thith ith so poggas!” She blurted out.

What.

The sound of glass shattering rang inside Anon’s head, his pupils dilating.

“...What. Did you just say.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement.

Celestia froze at the seriousness of his voice. She blinked, looking up at his face, her teeth and lips still glomped down on his underwear.

His lips were set in a thin line and his face was deadpanned as his darkened eyes leered at her.

Celestia started to sweat as she let go of his boxers.

She didn’t move, In fear of somehow upsetting him. Her ears flattened against her head.

“U-uh... I said: ‘this is so poggers’? That thing you exclaim sometimes when you’re happy?” She chuckled nervously as he continued to stare at her—almost through her.

Anon lowered his head slightly.

“...Never say that again.” He muttered.

Celestia nodded her head feverishly. “...Okay Anon, dearest. I promise I will never say that again.”

“Good.”

A moment of silence, then Celestia’s ears stood back up.

“So... can I suck your dick now?”

Anon sighed.

“Yeah.”

“Woohoo!”

Author's Notes:

Almost started to write full on smut there 😰 This came out of nowhere, I’ll probably be turning the rating to Mature if this is the route we’re going.

(That moment when you accidentally write almost 2K words of snuggling and now it’s 3:00AM.)

First post of the year my friends! Have a good morning, night, and everything in between! Yes, this is a threat. You better be fucking
V I B I N G.

😘

(This is just gonna be something I dump more of my dumb ideas into. Expect no scheduled updates. Perhaps another chapter in 7 days, perhaps another chapter in 7 years. I’m a FanFiction writer, what did you expect? Probably will complete tho, it’s not a premise with a long life span.)