I, Twilight Sparkle, Plan To Become the Most Evil Edgelord-I Mean Warlord-EVER!
by redandready45
First published

Stop laughing at me, I'm serious! (A Canterlot Wedding Fic)
(Featured November 30, 2020-December 2, 2020)
After being betrayed by everypony around her, Twilight Sparkle plans to become a warlord in the desert wastelands!
Will she rise above her disgrace to become the most powerful and evil warlord ever?
Spoiler alert: no. But it will be fun to watch her try.
An AU of A Canterlot Wedding, where Chrysalis didn't banish Twilight to the caves.
The Exile of Twilight Sparkle
Author's Notes:
Someone asked me why Twilight wasn't banished to the mines like in canon.
So I decided to add a chapter explaining what made Chrysalis change her mind.
Enjoy.
A disguised Queen Chrysalis never felt more ecstatic than she did before, having plucked a thorn from her side.
The obnoxious unicorn had been annoying perv, constantly shaking her rump at her in order to enact some weird unicorn mating ritual or something. Chrysalis wasn't quite sure. More importantly, she had nearly unraveled her whole scheme.
But with a good performance of crocodile tears, and a good alibi, she not only made the unicorn look like a lunatic, but made everypony even more supportive of her.
She trotted back into the throne room to retrieve a broach for the wedding. She didn't want to wear such pointless luxuries, but it was more important than ever that she play the part of the kindly princess so nopony else got suspicious.
From behind the door, the disguised Changeling monarch saw the lavender moron-Twilight was her name- was still in the reception room. She was so broken after being berated by her friends, she laid in the ground, wallowing in self-pity. The unicorn was so lost in her grief, she didn't acknowledge the presence of the disguised queen. A nasty grin forming on her face, she decided to give that lavender menace one last twist of the knife.
"Your Majesty." Chrysalis turned and saw a white Earth pony filly with a poofy orange mane approach her. She was clad in a black and green dress, which was what her spies wore to make them identifably.
"Dispense with the disguise Thorax," Chrysalis said civily, "you won't be seen."
The disguised aide was taken aback. "But this dress so...fluffy and comfortable." The disguised princess glared. "OK. OK." With a burst of flames, Thorax was back to his old self.
"Congratulations on your performance," Thorax said in a sycophantic tone.
The queen rolled her eyes, annoyed by his brown-nosing. "Yes, but now I must finish the job."
Thorax looked confused. "Finish the job how?"
A mean grin formed on Chrysalis' face. "I intend to send the pathetic mare to the mines."
"Why?" Thorax asked in confusion.
"Because it's funny," Chrysalis pointed out as if Thorax had asked why the sky was blue.
"Wouldn't she just....I don't know...discover the imprisoned Princess and help her escape."
Chrysalis grumbled like an angry filly. How dare her aid disrupt her fun with his...logic. Were Thorax not so competent, she would have destroyed him long ago.
But with some relucatance, Chrysalis accepted this. "Very well, Thorax. What do you propose we do?"
"Well, she thinks she screwed up," Thorax said. His tone indicated he felt a little bad for the weeping pony, "so I doubt she'll suspect you again. So maybe we should leave her to her own devices."
Suddenly, Thorax was struck on the head Chrysalis with a hoof.
"What was that for?" Thorax replied with dismay.
"For suggesting something as ridiculous as sending her to the minds!" Chrysalis bellowed.
Thorax was annoyed at his Queen, once again, passing the buck onto him for her bad ideas. "I didn't suggest that, you-,"
"What do I pay you minions for anyways?" Chrysalis whined.
"You don't pay me," Thorax pointed out with a frown. "You're technically an autocrat under which me and my fellow soldiers lack collective bargaining-,"
"Just shut up and get me ready, servant!" Chrysalis pointed out, storming away to Cadence's suite.
"What's up her carapace," Thorax grumbled. He shifted back into his little filly form. "At least the dress is comfy."
"There," Twilight said in tears. "My goodbye letter has been completed. All 674 pages of it." The stack of papers went up to the ceiling.
She looked around her old room in Canterlot Castle. While Ponyville was her home at heart, she never forgot Canterlot as the place she grew up in. Now she would never see it again, since Princess Celestia was obviously going to banish her any second.
The thought made Twilight nearly cry some more. After all her hard work, her relationship with the Princess was tarnished forever over one dumb mistake.
She couldn't go back to Ponyville either. Her friends-former friends now-hated her guts. She had nowhere to go. Nothing to live for. She placed the goodbye list right on her desk near the window so that everypony would see it.
With one last sad look, she bade her first home outside of her parents' house a silent farewell.
Twilight looked over her Warlord Checklist. "Make a silent, but solemn exit from my old bedroom. Check." She slammed the door.
A gust of wind blew in, blowing all the papers out of the window.
Just one second later, the Bearers and Spike burst into the room, forgiving smiles on her face.
"Twilight," Pinkie Pie chirped, while carrying a large cake on her body. "We're gonna throw you a We-Forgive-You-For-Acting-Like-A-Paranoid-McLooneypants-Party." Pinkie gasped. The room was empty.
"Oh no," Pinkie Pie weeped, "Twilight was so upset by what we did, she must've exiled herself to the badlands, forsaken friendship, and become a meany supervillain." Pinkie wept, tears literally bursting out of her eyes.
None of the other Bearers were impressed with Pinkie's inference.
"Or maybe she just went home out of embarassment," Spike remarked dryly.
"Well, there's that," Pinkie commented, her crying stopping almost immediately.
"Should we go to Ponyville and bring her back to the wedding?" Rarity asked with concern. "I know Twilight acted out of sorts, but getting kicked out of one of the most important days in her brother's life is a bit harsh."
The Bearers thought it over before Applejack gave an answer.
"I think Twilight should stay home and give her brother some space," the orange pony said in a stern tone.
"But she seemed sorry," Fluttershy said, her blue eyes upset at the idea of making anypony upset.
"She said she was sorry when she brainwashed everypony with a doll," Rainbow Dash pointed out. "She promised us she wouldn't let her egghead obsessions ruin anypony's day again. And guess what? She did it again."
"It may be harsh, but I think Twilight needs a good lesson about not acting out," Applejack pointed out.
"Besides, we can always bring her pictures of the wedding," Spike said with a smile while wearing a camera around his neck.
Everypony agreed, left the room, and went back to planning the wedding.
"All those fools laughed at me!" Twilight declared in a vengeful rage. "But I'll show them! I'll become the most feared warlord in the badlands and-
"Madam." Twilight was interrupted from her ranting by an annoyed train attendant. Some blue stallion with a blue officer's cap. "Several passengers have complained to me about you disturbing them with your monologuing." He pointed with a hoof at the window. "If you wish to rant, please do it out of the window."
"Sorry sir," Twilight said gregariously, "I maybe about to embark on a descent into evil, but I never wanted to be rude about it." Twilight stuck her head out of the window to continue her megalomaniacal gloat.
- I will have vengenace upon all those fools for doubting me! MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"
Twilight looked over her warlord list. "Make a deranged proclamation of vengeance against my former friends and family. Check." Twilight was about to pull her head back into the passenger car, only for the window to slam shut on her neck. "Conductor!" Twilight wheezed, her windpipe slightly crushed by the window, her panic making her unable to use magic on the window. "Help!"
The Wrath of Twilight Sparkle (Edited)
"Soon, I shall have my revenge against all ponykind," Twilight declared in a merciless outrage. "The Day of Retribution will be swift and fierce. I will slaughter you like-,"
"Excuse me." Twilight looked away form the bathroom mirror. A curmungeonly looking pony janitor, as indicated by the mop and dustbin he was carrying, was staring at her with annoyance. "What are you, uh, doing?"
Twilight's merciless visage was replaced with a genial smile. "Why praciting my megalomaniacal warlord speech of course!" the unicorn declared, as if the pony janitor said the silliest thing in the world.
"Well, can you please practice it somewhere else. I have to clean up."
"Of course," Twilight said with an understanding smile. "I don't want my rise to power to get in the way of your work schedule. That would just be so rude." She trotted out of the bathroom.
"Tourist," the janitor muttered with a roll of his eyes.
Twilight trotted around the rustic fronteir town she arrived in, glancing at the next thing on her warlord list.
"Find the most shady bar in the badland town I'll settle in," Twilight read, "and demand to meet the outlaws who reign over the town using terror." Thanfully, since the town had only a few hundred ponies living here, finding the bar was easy.
It had the typical wooden doors and the faint sound of catchy jukebox music coming from it.
"OK, did that," Twilight said, marking it off her list. "Go inside, and challenge the outlaws to a duel, defeat them, and declare with vicious triumph that the town is under new management." Twilight reached into her saddlebag. "It's a good thing I remembered to buy the proper attire," Twilight said. She pulled out a pink steton, like the one her so-called former friend Applejack wore, and put it on her head.
"Perfect," Twilight declared, "this will definitely make me look intimidating and dangerous."
"Hey!" Twilight noticed a couple of colts, around pre-teen age, looking at her with sneers on their muzzles.
"You look like you got a cuddlefish on your head," one of them declared. They both cackled at her like she was a clown.
Twilight took her contigency list, which she prepared in case of all emergencies.
"If somepony laughs at you," Twilight read, "rear up with a hiss to establish dominance, say 'you don't know who your messing with', and inflict bodily harm upon them. Outright maiming isn't necessary, but it can help as much as a simple magic blast."
Twilight reared up at the annoying colts, "You don't know who you're messing with-," Twilight paused as the hat fell over her head.
"Help, help!" Twilight wailed. "Get this cuddlefish- I mean, hat, off of me. IT'S DARK!" Twilight gallopped wildly in a panic, only to crash into a water barrel, rupturing it, and spilling its contents all over herself.
In her daze, Twilight heard the mocking laughter of the two colts.
"Oh I'm so scared," one colt declared.
"See you next fall," the other sneered at her.
Twilight, despite being half-conscious, could feel the scorn of the other ponies on her.
"Note to self," Twilight mumbled in pain and embarassment. "Add 'make sure the steton you buy actually fits on your head' to the list."
Once she regained her bearings, and dried her fur out on the hot desert sun, Twilight trotted back to the bar.
"Oh man," Twilight said. "I am way off schedule. I don't even have time to do the slow ominous trot that shows everypony my confidence and power. I'll have to skip ahead to bursting into the bar."
Twilight galloped to the front door, and burst in, loudly slamming the front doors open.
"ALRIGHT!" Twilight declared bombastically. "I WANT TO SPEAK TO WHO'S IN-,"
"Look what you did!" One of the outlaws, as shown by his hat and stern features, declared with a furious look.
"Hey," Twilight Sparkle whined petulantly. "You're not supposed to interrupt. I have an iternary I must-,"
"You knocked out Roscoe," another one of them yelled. The words gave Twilight pause.
"What?" Twilight said in confusion. The two ponies gallopped to her right. It was then that Twilight noticed what happened.
A green Earth pony stallion was out cold. Twilight's heart began to feel weak when she realized she knocked him out by slamming the doors open so quikcly. The two outlaw stallions tried helping their friend regain consciousness.
"Roscoe, can you hear me?" One of them, a yellow stallion with a blond mane, pleaded in desperation.
"I think he's still breathing," The other, a tan stallion with a brown mane, observed in a softer tone. "Bartender do you-,"
"Don't worry," the bartender, a heavy set female unicorn with brown fur and a red mane, "my hardest cider could wake up a slumbering dragon."
The tan stallion noticed something white on the ground. "Oh my gosh, he even chipped some teeth."
Twilight felt her ears go flat on her face.
"What were you thinking, bursting in like that?!" The yellow stallion exclaimed at Twilight in anger.
"I'm so sorry,"Twilight wailed, her eyes wet and her heart heavy. "I justed wanted to be a murderous warlord. I never meant to hurt anypony!"
"Excuse me?" The yellow stallion said with a mixture of confusion and disdain. "Warlord?"
"Yeah," the lavender unicorn muttered. "I was planning to become a desert warlord, and I figured I would battle some outlaws to prove my power and skill."
The yellow stallion looked at the purple-eyed mare like she had come from some other planet, while the bartender fed the unconscious green stallion some of her liquor. "You thought this would be some cowpony novel set in the Warring Herds era?"
"Uh, well," Twilight muttered nervously, "maybe."
"Let me guess: you're some Canterlot brat who thought we were all a bunch of country bumpkins, didn't you?" The tan stallion asked with an unimpressed tone.
A sheepish smile formed on Twilight's face. "Uh, well-,"
"Despite how we look and sound, we do have things like law, education, and technology," the yellow stallion muttered in annoyance.
Twilight looked at her list. "So you don't have outlaws terrozing you?"
"No," the tan stallion replied.
"Highwayponies robbing carriages?"
"No."
"Innocent mares being tied to railroad tracks?"
"No."
"Uh...evil property developers trying to destroy this town for commercial gain?"
"Uh, we do have the rule of law and property rights," the yellow stallion lectured in a sarcastic tone. "A property developer can't just knock down a town, willy-nilly. He could seize the property he wants through eminent domain, but that requires a court battle that would take so much time, it would easier to buy the land he or she wants."
"And even if his or her case is successful, he would still have to compensate the owners of the seized property," the tan stallion added.
Twilight looked at the two stallions with no small amount of confusion.
"We're both members of town zoning," the yellow Earth pony explained with an smug smile.
"It's shocking that we're not a bunch of dumb rubes, ain't it?" The tan pony replied with an annoyed grin,
Before Twilight could respond, another pony trotted in, just as the green stallion had regained conscienousness, as shown by the serious hacking. The pony, a dark red stallion with a black mane and a thick mustache, was concerned by the sound.
"What's going on?" He asked in a stern voice.
"Sheriff," the tan stallion pleaded. "That crazy mare knocked out Roscoe and broke his teeth."
"Sheriff?" Twilight asked. It was then that Twilight noticed a gold star near the stallion's withers. The stallion gave Twilight, a neutral, but still scruntinizing glare.
"We're you near the town square?" The pony asked.
Twilight cocked her head in confusion. "Yes?"
"I got a report that a mare of your...description destroyed a water barrel just an hour ago." His eyes narrowed slightly. "You wouldn't happen to know who that was, wouldn't you?"
Twilight, to her horror, realized she was being interrogated.
"That mare also broke my teeth," the green stallion declared, his mumbling indicated he was in some pain.
A nasty grin formed on the stallion's face. "I strongly suggest you give me your name and come with me to the station."
Twilight felt her blood go cold, as she realized she was in trouble.
"So...let me get this straight," the sheriff, whose name she learned was Hard Tack, asked her idly while glancing at her list with reading glasses. It was a fitting name, since that was his cutie mark.
Twilight was in an interrogation room. She had been forced to sit there for a couple of hours after the stallion had asked her for her name, her hoof print, and her address.
"You decided to turn to a life of crime and created a bunch of hoopla because....you got booted from a wedding?"
Twilight felt a sheepish grin form on her face. "It does sound...kind of silly... nowyou mention it."
"No, silly is when I arrested a mare who kidnapped ponies and stole their cutie marks because her best friend moved away," the stallion muttered with enormous disdain. "This," the stallion declared while lifting up a paper, "is completely insane!"
Twilight flinced again at the harshness of the stallion.
He glanced at the list again. "You thought the sheriff would," he paused to read the list, " 'be a powerless corrupt drunk with no authority and with little backbone'?" He slammed his glasses on the table and glared at Twilight again.
"Well, that's what happens in the books," Twilight defended feebly.
"First of all, I didn't earn get position around sitting around and chug whisky all day. Sheriff positions are gained through training and a civil service exam. I earned my position through my services to the Crown-"
"You love boasting about that," some mare said with a sly look, butting into the room, "don't ya Hard Tack?" She was a pink mare with an orange mane and a cutie mark that looked like margarine.
"Oh hush up, Margerine," the stallion muttered with a mixture of playfulness and annoyance. When the mare left the interrogation room, the sheriff turned back to glare daggers at the remorseful unicorn. "Second of all, it is clear you think that we're all just a bunch of dumb hicks who don't matter." He held up the list furiously to Twilight. "The ponies around here may not be as sophisicated as your intelligent self, but we have lives and any one of these acts could've ruined them. Your two stunts alone nearly cost the town its water supply AND put Roscoe Cactus in the dentist's office." He finished with an expression full of disappoinment. "But all that is just a game to you, isn't it?"
Twilight flinched and sighed. "I'm sorry. I guess I was acting dumb."
"We'll I'm glad your sorry," the stallion muttered joyously. "But...you still got to pay the price for the water barrel and damaging Roscoe's teeth." The red stallion got up from his stool, and trotted out of the room. Twilight looked out of the tiny glass window, and what she saw made her jaw drop.
He was preparing some kind of rope in the shape of a noose. Twilight shook with terror. She would be strung from the tree by a lynch mob. Time slowed as Twilight waited for the pony to prepare her for execution. It was what she deserved, but she at least hoped he would let her write once last letter saying goodbye to everypony.
The pony burst in. "Please sign this form-,"
"DON'T LYNCH ME, PLEASE!" Twilight pleaded. "I have files that need organizing-," she did a double take. "Wait, what?"
"Sign this form, agreeing to your day of trial, and you'll be free to go," Hard Tack muttered.
"Wait, you're not going to hang me," Twilight asked.
"Why would I hang you?" Hard Tack replied with annoyance.
"You were making a rope, and since this place is run according to mob justice-,"
Hard Tack let out an annoyed sigh and facehoofed. "Public execution hasn't been practiced in Equestria for two centuries, and even if it was, none of your stunts would be worthy of being executed over."
"What about the rope?" Twilight timidly asked.
"I just like practicing knots."
Twilight stared at the pony for a few moments. "So you're just...letting me go? Why?"
"When you were in the cell, I used your information to do a background check on you," Hard Tack declared. "Up until know, you had one of the cleanest criminal records any mare could ever have. That means your eligible to be released until your court date next month."
"Really?" Twilight said. "So I won't be going to prison?"
"Well, since you're also apparently a national hero," Hard Tack said with a wry smile, "you'll probably just have your wages garnished to pay off the town and Roscoe's dental bills in lieu of jail." An amused smile appeared on the stallion' mouth. "Besides, you don't seem at all like the criminal type, Ms. Sparkle. And despite everything, I think you're a just a good pony havin' a bad day."
Despite her technically being in trouble, Twilight couldn't help but laugh. "I guess I was being ridiculous," the lavender unicorn concded. "So what now?"
"Well, when ah let you go, you can take the train home." The Sheriff let his muzzle fall into a hoof with a thoughtful. "Since the sun is setting, I suppose the last train has left already. But you can rent a motel-,"
"Uh," Twilight said sheepishly.,"I...don't have any bits."
The Sherrif's eyes narrowed. "You we're you robbed?"
"Uh...I kind of...let myself be...robbed," Twilight admitted in a tiny voice.
The Sherrif's eyes narrowed in disdain. "You let yourself be robbed? Why?"
"To rid myself of my naivete," Twilight told the stallion as if that explained everything. "I figured I would reimbursed through the pillaging I would once I amassed my warlord army." The stallion just stared at the mare with disbelief.
"Do we really want that crazy pony in our home?" Margerine asked Hard Tack in a soft tone. The married couple watched from their kitchen as Twilight organized Hard Tack's filing cabient. It was Hard Tack's least favorite chore, yet the lavender mare was acting like a little filly sliding down a slide while doing it.
"Are you kidding," Hard Tack muttered, "she let herself get robbed on purpose. If we throw her out, she'll be dead in an hour."
Margerine sighed. "At least she's helping us pick up the house." She trotted to the wood stove. "I'll make dinner."
"Do you really think your friends and family would disown you over something so petty?" Margerine asked Twilight in a sympathetic tone. The three ponies were eating at the dinner table. Hard Tack and Margerine's disdain for the unicorn faded as they chatted with her over a nice daisy casserole. They began seeing her as a well-meaning mare who was a little bit troubled.
"They were mad at me," Twilght said miserably. She put down her fork, too upset to eat. "And after what I did today, they probably-"
"Ms. Sparkle," Hard Tack said in a softer tone. "I wasn't happy with what you did, but I can plainly see this was an accident. As long as you pay your debts and say sorry, I'm sure they won't be mad at you."
"But they didn't listen to me at all when I got scared-,"
"Because there was a wedding going on sweetie," Margerine added in a soothing tone. "Listen Ms. Sparkle. Just because the ponies in your life act a little selfish doesn't mean they don't care about you. You can't always be the top priority in everypony's life. Your friends and your family have to live their own lives."
"I guess," Twilight remarked.
"I'm sure once the wedding is over, they'll be in good enough spirits to understand," Hard Track added in a soft tone.
"Really," Twilight asked with some hope is her voice.
"Honey," Margerine said. "We've been married for longer than you've been alive."
"Says you, I'm 27," Hard Tack said in jest.
"The point is darling, all relationships go through ups and downs," Margerine pointed out gently. "And you and your friends have faced down Discord. I doubt one stupid act will make them forget that."
A relieved smile appeared on Twilight's face. "Thanks, you two. And thanks for letting me stay here."
"Just stay out of trouble," Hard Tack with a mixture of genuine warmth and firmness.
"I will," Twilight said. Feeling some weight off her shoulders, Twilight ate the casserole more joyfully than before.
Twilight found herself being roused from her sleep by some hard shaking. She was sleeping on Hard Tack and Margerine's couch. While not her first choice for a bed, she was too exhausted by stress to care. She woke up to Hard Tack looking at her gravely.
"Hard Tack, what's wrong?" Twilight asked.
"Canterlot is...under attack," the stallion said in a serious tone.
Chrysalis never felt greater joy than before. Canterlot had been overrun by her swarm, Celestia and that pathetic pink princess were captive, Shining Armor was fully under her spell, providing her with enough love magic to battle alicorns, and the so-called elements were captive and unable to reach their greatest power.
She looked at the five so-called Bearers. They were pinned to the wall with her slime, their entire bodies were encased in cocoons from the neck down, and they had hopeless, angry expressions on her face. She flew up to them, relishing in digging the knife even deeper.
"To think, if you hadn't driven your poor friend away," Chrysalis gloated to the heroes, "you all could've avoided all this."
"SHUT UP!" The blue blustery pegasus shouted defensively. "When I get out of here-,"
"You haven't won yet, ya oversized varmint," Applejack said defiantly.
"Yeah you meanie," Fluttershy said with an usual amount of bite. "Equestria's forces will come after-,"
"My power has beaten your pathetic princess," Chrysalis said, glancing back at the alicorn who was completely trapped in a cocoon. "There is no power left that can stop me!"
"There is," a powerful voice declared. Chrysalis looked back and saw a frustratingly familiar sight.
"THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP!" Twilight declared bombastically. Twilight then pulled out her list. "Triumphantly declare that friendship is mighty. Check."
"Twilight," Pinkie Pie declared happily. All the other bearers were utterly relieved.
Chrysalis looked enraged. "How could you possibly return! Your friends and family backstabbed you! Betrayed you! Left you to wallow-,"
"You're right," Twilight said with a hint of self-loathing. "I was so upset, I nearly threw myself into exile. But you know what I learned? My friends may not be perfect, but I'd be stupid to leave them over one mistake. And if you think I'm gonna let something so petty get in the way of helping them, you must really be a lonely and pathetic being." Twilight took out her list again. "Defend friendship and belittle opponent. Check."
The Changeling Queen did not take kindly to that, if the growl on her muzzle and her horn lighting up was any indication. "How cute. But I still have the power of an alicorn, pony." Her horn gloated wildly as she prepared to strike down the insolent mare. "You can't stand up to that."
"But I can!" Something slammed into the Changeling Queen and pinned her to the wall. A blue, furry something. Chrysalis' anger was replaced by fear as she saw the blue eyes of the night princess glaring at her.
"Didn't expect me did you?!" Princess Luna said with a wry smile. "I'm not surprised. I wasn't noticed too often over a millenia ago, and it drove me a bit mad. But now I realize there are benefits to not being noticed." Luna's smile grew wider. "Like being the element of surprise."
Chrysalis shrieked and blasted the night alicorn. The two soon engaged in a massive duel in the middle of building.
"Miss Twilight," Luna ordered. "Go to your friends. I shall hold her off!"
"I will not be denied my power by some lesser princess!" Chryaslis yelled as she blasted Luna.
Luna dodged with a smug expression. "How terrible for you. Despite all your power, you can't beat this lesser princess!"
Chrysalis shrieked in a rage as she fired off another energy blast.
Twilight ran up to her friends, only to be blocked by a wall of Changelings.
"You don't have the energy to blast us all," one of the Changelings gloated.
"But we do!" A massive fireball blew the Changelings away. The captive bearers looked with shock. Two ponies, an orange mare and red stallion of middle age were pushing a massive cannon.
"Who's that?" Rainbow asked with a mixture of confusion.
"Two new friends," Twilight said happily. "New friends saving me at the last moment. Check."
"Don't worry Princess," Hard Tack declared. "We'll handle the bugs."
"Go to your friends, sweetheart!" Margerine said. "We'll handle the clean up."
Twilight ran to her friends and craned her neck to look up at them.
"Twilight," Fluttershy pleaded. "Can you get us down?"
"Of course." Using her horn, Twilight let out a laser that freed Fluttershy and Rainbow. Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack were later freed, with the two pegasi catching them before they could hit the ground. The skilled unicorn pulled out her list. "Free friends. Check."
"OK Twilight, now what?" Rainbow asked. Twilight took a fancy box out of her saddlebags. She opened it, revealing the Elements of Harmony that were inside. The Six Bearers put on their necklaces, Twilight put on her tiara, and together they unleashed a magic wave that spread across Canterlot.
Every cocooned pony was released from their captivity, the Changelings fell to the ground unconscious, Shining was freed from his brainwashing, Chrysalis was drained of all her magic, and Canterlot was returned to its pristine beauty.
When it was over, Twilight found herself being hugged by her friends, Shining, and Princess Celestia, who threw a barrage of apologies at her.
"We're sorry Twilight!"
"We should've listened to you!"
"Can you ever forgive-,
"Girls," Twilight said, pushing them away with a reassuring smile. "There's nothing to forgive. Even though I was right, I acted like a complete nutcase at the rehearsal. I shouldn't have expected anypony to believe me when I did that."
"But we, to a certain extant, drove you to that," Rarity muttered shamefully, "by being so obsessed with the wedding, we completely ignored your feelings."
"Yeah you did," Twilight pointed out with a frown. She glanced at the sheriff couple with a small smile before glancing back at her friends with a big smile. "But I'm not gonna let that get in the way of our friendship. You guys are more important to me than a dumb grudge." Twilight took out her list. "Forgive friends and assure them that the strength of our friendship is greater than any hardship. Check."
"What matters is we're all safe." Shining added. His eyes widened with horror. "Oh no. Where's Cadence!"
"Yes," Luna said to the downed Changeling Queen with no small amount of malice, "where is my adopted niece?"
Despite being defeated, Chrysalis smiled in spite. "She's gone forever.
"LIAR!" Shining bellowed, tackling the Queen. "WHERE IS SHE?"
"There is nothing you can do to make me talk! Torture me. Send me to Tartarus. Turn me into a statue! If I can't have Equestria, I can revel in your misery of never seeing Cadence again."
Hard Tack approached the defeated queen with a sly smile. "I suppose there is some community service that can jog your-,"
"SHE'S IN THE CAVES!" Chrysalis declared fearfully. "I SWEAR! Please don't make me do community service! I beg you!"
"Did you really want to end up like that?" Margerine asked Twilight, gesturing at the defeated Queen.
"Thanks for helping me dodge that bullet," Twilight said with a sheepish smile.
"Guards!" Princess Celestia commanded. Shining Armor and other guards stood in attention. "Princess Cadence has been trapped underground for several days. We must find her and possibly prepare for her some medical care."
With a salute, Shining and his fellow guards immediately gallopped out of the room to search for Cadence.
"Should we join them?" Twilight asked Princess Celestia.
"I think they have that covered," Princess Celestia said. "For now, I think we need to rest from what has been a trying few days."
"And throw Twilight a Thanks-For-Saving-Us-And-Still-Wanting-To-Be-Our-Friend-Party," Pinkie Pie chirped.
"Yes," Princess Celestia said. "I believe that is also in order." Princess Celestia said with a grateful smile to her faithful student. The two stared at each other before joining in a warm hug.
A few small tears fell down Twilight's face. They were happy tears. She knew that whatever challenges she faced, she would always be Celestia's student. And with her friends joining in, she was more sure than ever that their friendship was stronger than the machinations of some pathetic monster.
"Wait," Twilight said with a stern tone, "hugging after this was not on the list." Everypony frowned, only for Twilight to start snickering. "I'm just messing with you guys."
Everypony let out a laugh, partly out of relief, and partly because they knew their friendships were still intact, no matter what they faced.