Everyday Life With Guardsmares
Chapter 78
Previous Chapter Next ChapterHonour Bound
It'd been a headache-inducing kind of day for Corporal Honour Bound. Lifting her left forehoof out of the bubbling pool, she dribbled some of the steamy-hot water on her muzzle, then rubbed her forehead.
It was all a little too much to take in.
The fourth member of her quaternion, assigned to protect the dignity and, if necessary, the life of Equestria's Royal Engineer, Anonymous, was in fact the top-ranking batpony assassin in Equestria. She'd led them all into the rookery under Canterlot mountain, the local colony for a race which had, until recently, been sworn to overthrow Princess Celestia and the entire Equestrian order.
And she hadn't mentioned her station.
Or the fact that she'd disobeyed her religious superior's orders by accepting this VIP assignment. Or the fact that said religious superior was her own mother.
Ebonshield might have a black shield stamped on her flank, but when Honour looked at the 'sergeant' now, visibly sweating white foam around her neck from the heat of the jacuzzi, all she could picture was a 'blue falcon.' The batpony might as well just have thrown them all underneath the wheels of the Royal Engineer's carriage. Including the Lord himself.
Dropping her forehoof back into the water, Honour looked lazily around the hot-tub circle.
Unsurprisingly, Glamerspear appeared shocked. Equally unsurprisingly, she immediately vocalized it. "That white-powdered would-be princess who marched in with a whole battalion of cultists was your mom!?"
Ebonshield nodded.
"Yes..."
She trailed off and looked evasively down at the water, shaking her head. "... But, please to understand, Specialist. Among the Children, a family does not work the same way that it does for Equestrians."
That was cryptic -- just like so much of what else she'd said and done that day. Honour was not in the mood to ask more questions, though, because every one of those just seemed to result in more troublesome answers.
Glamerspear had no such hesitation, however.
"Whaddya mean, not the same way? She's your mother, ain't she?"
Her Manehattan accent slipped in a bit there; Honour noticed she did that a bit when she was upset. The quaternion's fashionable unicorn mostly tried to keep herself sounding Canterlot-proper, but she'd let enough words blurt out that anypony paying attention for long enough could place her as a 'Hattan native. Despite spending a few months up there on assignment, Honour wasn’t well-versed enough to pick out her specific borough.
The corporal tilted her head forwards, scrunching her eyes closed. Exhaustion from all the work -- and all the stress -- must’ve been hitting her hard, if all she could focus on right then was Glamerspear's accent. Bringing up both forehooves, Honour dribbled hot water down her shoulders, rubbing the soothing liquid into her sore muscles.
Somewhere across the hot tub from her, the batpony kept talking. "She gave birth to me, yes -- and I drank of her milk; but that is the extent of our intimacy. Among the Children, the rearing of young is given over entirely to the communal crèche."
With her muzzle almost against the surface of the pool, Honour inhaled the vapors. There was a mineral tinge to them -- it smelled a bit like the Fillydelphia shoreline, after a fresh spring rain had come and thoroughly rinsed away all the city's grime. The smiling ponies in the white jackets at the front desk did say that the water here was drawn directly from a natural hot spring, rather than Canterlot's glacial canals.
And didn't Anonymous mutter something about Canterlot Mountain having been a volcano?
Because of the presence of that strange 'cave of pillars'?
‘That would explain it.’
To Honour’s right, Sparkshower continued the conversation. "But what about your father?"
The earth pony slowly straightened her neck in time to catch Ebonshield shrugging. "I do not know him. He was probably from a different House. This is the way of the Lunars, you see -- diplomacy is conducted through trade, and sometimes the 'merchandise' being offered is not always physical."
Glamerspear couldn’t let that one get away. "They use sex to sweeten deals? Sounds pretty physical to me." The unicorn specialist looked over at their VIP. “I guess that's why the 'Reverend Mother' was so keen on making sure you were taken care of as well, sir."
Beside the corporal, Anonymous held his eyes closed, and had somehow managed to sink himself almost up to his chin in the hot tub. "Mm-hmm."
‘How is he in so deep?’
‘Is he even sitting on the bench?’
Frowning, Honour leaned back and glanced behind him to figure it out. Beneath the bubbles, she made out that he'd slouched himself down so completely that only his shoulders were, just barely, on the bench -- the rest of his body was floating out in front of him. Sure enough, one of his feet breached the small mountain of bubbles in the middle of the circular pool.
‘Damn, that actually looks pretty comfortable.’
Although it was made abundantly clear during the morning's training that Anonymous' body was more flexible than the average pony's, Honour stretched out her hind legs and tried to get into a similar position. This was her first time in a jacuzzi, so it took some doing.
Glamerspear, meanwhile, continued her interrogation. "So, if you were the result of some kinda trade agreement, what does that make your brother Marcos, then? Re-ratifying the treaty?"
The sergeant chuckled. "Perhaps; I do not know. He may have a different father; Carmen has never said, and in any case, there is the likelihood that she may not know with precision, either -- only enough to tell him which mares are not a suitable earth for his seed."
There was a splash as Ebonshield dropped her outstretched wings into the water. "I have many younger brothers and sisters like him on the moon, and many of them entered the Lunar phase. I think that Carmen wished this for me, her first-born, as well."
Just when Honour thought she was getting the hang of the position, her hind legs abruptly floated up from underneath her, propelled by one of the jets pumping water into the pool. She had to turn over in a scramble, lest she detach herself from the wall. Hooking one hoof over the edge, she pulled herself back to the submerged bench. Thankfully, everypony else seemed too interested in Ebonshield's revelations to have noticed the corporal’s momentary struggle.
"By the time I came of age, she had risen far in the Lunar ranks of the House of Vapors. My scores were favorable, and she made sure that I was offered the same path behind her."
Slowly twisting around, Honour went for attempt number two.
"But I was more interested in the activities physical, and I selected instead the bid of the Stars, who offered to allow me to select my own school of choice. I chose the Shining Dance, and, almost thirty-three years later, here I am. And I do not think that she has ever forgiven me this refusal."
As Honour got her hind legs in position and began to float that entire quarter of her body, it started to dawn on her just how long Ebonshield had been at this. She started training to be an assassin at age ten. No wonder she was still such a superb fighter even now, in her early forties.
When Honour was ten, she was just a knobby-kneed youth aimlessly roaming the dockside streets of Fillydelphia. Both Honour and Ebonshield had been raised by a single parent, but at least the corporal still had a mother to call her back home for supper after a day spent mostly in search of the boat which would carry her off to some distant land of her dreams...
Or at least see the return of her absentee father.
Losing her grip on the bench, Honour’s head started to dip beneath the surface, covering her ears as Glamerspear asked the cordial middle-aged assassin some new question. Whatever relaxation the earth pony was supposed to have achieved with the Royal Engineer's state of maximum hot-tub immersion was overshadowed by a deep-felt sense of disappointment in her own achievements, frustration as to her ultimate direction, and exhaustion from everything that had happened today. Maybe that's why she’d retreated into the formal execution of her orders 'to the letter,' going so far as to follow her VIP into a private massage.
As Honour felt herself slipping further down, she swung a foreleg back to get a hoof hooked on some firmament.
Nothing had happened between Anonymous and the griffon 'nurse,' besides a very thorough back-rub, but the point was nopony in Equestria, no matter how high-placed, needed an honor guard in a bucking spa. Unlike the batponies, Equestria didn't have assassins slinking around looking to stab dignitaries while they were having a rub-down. Insisting on following protocol was just her escape from reality.
Her hoof slipped against the smooth porcelain tiles decorating the bench, and the waters rose past Honour’s eyes, heading for her nose and mouth.
Why had he let the earth pony get away with such stubbornness? Any other VIP would have told her to sod the rules and hoof it.
There was a splash beside Honour’s muzzle, and she felt the braid of her mane tumble into the water from where she’d left it coiled up on the deck. Now she’d have to untangle it and give it a wash before leaving, or else she’d smell like minerals and salt for the rest of the day. She threw another forehoof back and just barely caught the edge of the bench. Immediately, instinctively, she tried to haul herself back out of the water, only to find that same hoof slip right out from underneath her. She took a breath and shut her mouth as the waters closed up around her head.
Did Anonymous just not care about having her in the room while that griffon worked him over? Or was it that he was so unsure of his own footing in Equestria that he trusted in her completely to do what was correct? Like the incident with the movers on Thursday?
Unable to figure it out as she sank below the bubbling waters, Honour finally decided to throw in the towel and twisted around once more, flipping over onto her belly so that she could push down with all four legs and scramble back up to the surface. Emerging from the water with a gasp, she hooked her forehooves over the pool's edge, sputtering as she faced the tiled wall.
"You look as if you're holding on for dear life, Corporal." Anonymous spoke quietly to her from underneath her right shoulder, still floating where he was before, now with little more than his face and ears poking out from the water.
Perfect. Not only did she embarrass herself by being present for his nude back massage, listening in on the private grunts and moans elicited by that griffon's firm talons, now she’d shown him that, like a typical dockside Fillydelphian, she couldn’t swim worth a damn, either.
Honour took a moment to catch her breath, before answering him in a similarly low voice. "I, uh... You seemed pretty comfortable, sir, so I thought I'd try the same thing."
Behind her, Glamerspear and Sparkshower were loudly continuing to pepper Ebonshield with questions, but the corporal managed to focus on their own conversation.
Anonymous' face wobbled above the water as he nodded his head from underneath, like some kind of strange iceberg. "The trick is to let it all go, Corporal." He shut his eyes and lowered even his ears into the water, inhaling deeply through his nose before tilting it, too, under the waves, leaving only his mouth and chin above. "In order to float, get rid of what's trying to sink you."
That was easier said than done. Did he have any idea how much heavy baggage she was carrying around?
As if to refute her, the Royal Engineer lowered his whole head, but spread out his arms and legs, and within moments, his whole body rose to float serenely on the surface, right in the center of the circular pool.
Turning around, Honour stared in astonishment. It couldn't really be that easy; not for somepony with all the anchors she had weighing her down. Just look at what her hang-ups had made her do that afternoon, drowning herself in duty.
Anonymous drifted away, buffeted by the gentle jets of water; the other three ponies were so deep in their conversation they hadn’t quite noticed the creature heading towards them.
As Honour watched him go, she realized that the Royal Engineer probably had some chains of his own. Stranded on another, alien world -- who knows what he’d been forced to leave behind?
A career?
Friends?
Family?
And he was a workaholic; as bad as any she’d ever seen, except that he seemed to at least enjoy himself. But immersing himself in his job -- was that him shutting out his own personal daemons, in the same way that Honour coped with her own?
"Hey, whoa! Foot!!"
"Oh, sorry, Specialist."
While Honour was lost in thought, Anonymous managed to float all the way to the other side of the circular pool, his toes nearly slapping into Glamerspear's cheek before she noticed and ducked backwards out of the way. With a little splash, he quickly pushed himself back with his hands and then abandoned his floating pose to stand up straight, smiling and adjusting his bathing suit before stepping back over to his seat.
"Got a little carried away by the flow there."
Glamerspear eyeballed him as he sat back down. "Of course, sir."
Their VIP put a fist up to his mouth and closed his eyes into a yawn so large that it nearly tempted the corporal to copy him. "I'm just about ready for that nap, but if you all want to stick around a while longer, we don't have to head back to the palace. It's kind of cozy here, and I can just as easily get my winks in one of those poolside loungers."
‘It is cozy in this place.’
Something about it -- not just the facilities, or the decor, or the quiet-but-friendly staff -- made it inviting. Maybe that was just a property any good spa had; it’s not like Honour was any kind of expert.
Around the hot tub, four ponies nodded and muttered in agreement.
Glamerspear, now free of face-foot, looked to Corporal Bound to summarize. Acknowledging the specialist’s silent request, she glanced up at their VIP. "If it's all right with you, sir, we'll stay a while longer. Did you want anything before you settle down? And would you like us to wake you to return to the palace for supper?"
Anonymous slowly pulled himself up and then sat down on the edge, dangling his legs and feet in the pool, a groggy look on his face. Another yawn -- both arms outstretched, this time -- and then he shook his head at Honour. "If I need something, I'll talk to the staff. Dinner here or there doesn't matter to me, either. Wake me up if you decide you need to go back; I won't mind."
She nodded, and he pulled one of his legs out of the pool, but before he could stand, Sparkshower swam forward, her wings out of the water, and piped up. "Um, sir -- Could I ask you a personal question first?"
‘What now?’
‘Must be related to whatever they were talking about with the sergeant.’
"Sure, Specialist. As long as it's a quick one."
The doggy-paddling pegasus reached the edge of the pool, looking her VIP in the face. "I just was wondering, sir -- why did you refuse the Reverend Mother Superior's offer?"
That was personal, and it wasn’t their place as bodyguards to ask those kinds of questions.
Or to stand watch during sensual massages, for that matter.
Honour glared at the young, cream-colored Specialist, shaking her head slightly to indicate her disapproval, but before Sparkshower could retract the question, Anonymous chuckled, swishing his foot in the water. "Heh, you mean her offer of 'free hot sex, no strings attached'?"
Torn between backpedaling and carrying on, and looking more than a little scandalized by his blunt phrasing, the pegasus hesitantly nodded. "Yes, sir. I'm just asking because... Because I didn't think there were a lot of colts who would say 'no' to that sort of thing. Who could say no..."
With the interested gaze of a batpony and a unicorn at the back of her head, and a human and an earth pony to her front, she elaborated. "...Not if they were single, I mean."
The saltine unicorn couldn't resist getting a word in edgewise of her own. "M'yeah, and maybe not even otherwise."
Anonymous dipped his other foot back in the water, then pulled it out and bent forward to rub and squeeze the water between his toes. "Well, first of all, as the sergeant has made clear now, I could see that there were strings attached -- just not the kind that usually binds lovers together. I'm sure Carmen would have expected something in return."
He looked over at Ebonshield, who nodded. "Yes, Great Lord. Although if we return into the Rookery again, as you plan, it is likely that she will still expect to be rewarded for even this minor act of hospitality."
The Royal Engineer folded his now squeaky-clean foot underneath him, and then lifted the other out to attend to it. "I'm not surprised. And, who knows? It may have been a pointless exercise if I need her help to accomplish things later anyways. But I wasn't about to go getting myself immediately into her debt for a 'piece of tail.'"
With his other foot clean, he lowered it and sat at the edge of the pool, cross-legged, his hands resting on his knees. "Mind you, I probably would have gone for it when I was younger. Just not any more."
With another yawn, he unfolded his legs and got to his feet, stretching his arms high up into the air, drawing his skin taught against his body. "These days, I'm of the opinion that the 'strings' are what make love special."
This surprisingly frank and wholesome admission pleased the pegasus, and she smiled broadly. On the other side of the pool, Eb looks intrigued as well, and even Glamerspear snorted at the corniness of his statement.
"That answer your 'personal question,' Specialist?"
A few yellow locks, still curly despite being soaked with water, bounced up and down as Sparkshower enthusiastically nodded. "Yes, sir! Thank you, sir!"
"All right. I'm going to take a nap. Wake me if you need me. Like I said, I won't mind."
Honour watched as the tall, bipedal, alien VIP strolled over to the lounger holding his white cotton, minotaur-sized robe, put it on, laid down a few towels to use as padding and pillows, and finally settled in to rest, one arm draped across his eyes.
A studious worker, a friendly gentlecolt, an athlete and a scholar, and he even professed not to be out to score a quick buck?
This couldn’t be real; VIPs like Anonymous were one in a million -- maybe even a billion. And there hadn’t even been that many honored guests in Equestria.
Luckily, Honour had Glamerspear to bring her back down to earth. "*Snort* Geez, Sparks, if your coltfriend back in Berry saw you making those starry eyes at the Royal Engineer, he sure wouldn't be happy about it!"
That earned the unicorn an irritated splash of water from the pegasus, and within moments, the two young specialists were back at it again.
‘Oh, well.’
Most of Honour’s troubles, she didn’t think she could float away from quite so easily as Anonymous seemed able to manage. But those two impulsive junior guardsponies, at least, she could handle. After letting them splash it out for a bit, she ordered them to settle down, punctuating her words with a splash of her own.
"Knock it off, you two. This is a spa, not a water park."
"Sorry, Corporal."
"Sorry, Corporal."
She nodded her head back at the loungers. "You're going to need some rest before we head out tonight; might as well do it now while the Royal Engineer doesn't need all of us. Go hit the showers and then find somewhere to curl up."
Both of them were looking a little sleepy -- sleepier than Honour felt, and she was pretty ready to hit the sack herself.
Glamerspear nodded at Sparkshower. "C'mon, Sparks. There's a quiet room with plush cushions and a fireplace near the entrance."
"Ooh, sounds great!"
They headed off, and that just left Honour and the blue falcon in the hot tub together.
With a sigh, Ebonshield licked her lips. "If it would be acceptable, I think perhaps that I should also rest while the opportunity is in front of me."
Honour nodded as she stepped out of the pool. "Sure. Just one thing, Sergeant-"
Looking the batpony in the eyes -- a batpony who was not only almost twenty years her senior, but formally outranked her and outclassed her in combat to a degree that was almost frightening -- Honour furrowed her brow. “I don't want us going into the Rookery blind again. You told me on Thursday that I'm really in charge of this quaternion, so before we head out, I want a briefing. And if you need time to prepare one, then let me know, and I'll be the one to tell the Royal Engineer to cancel his plans for tonight."
There was a momentary look of confusion in the batpony's eyes, but then it disappeared into a friendly smile, which she followed up with a bow. "Of course, Caporal. And I will not need time to prepare -- only some little time to present."
Looking pleased, the dark batpony trotted off, and Honour slouched back down into the jacuzzi.
Did she, a lowly Corporal, just order the second-in-command of the batpony assassins to give her a bucking briefing?
Talk about ‘retreating into your work.’
Staring at the bubbling water, Honour made up her mind. Twisting herself around and trotting up and out of the Jacuzzi, she tossed a towel at the lounger next to her VIP. A quick shower -- including redoing her braid -- and then she’d curl up on the lounger next to the Royal Engineer.
At least she’d be nearby if, Celestia forbid, anything did happen.
And if it didn’t, then she’d be well-rested for tonight.
Suggested interlude music: Oscar Araujo - 'Waterfalls of Agharta', from 'Castlevania: Lords of Shadow' [2010]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmUZ8B2pgAc
