Honour Bound

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Honour's whole squad was quieter than it had ever been. It was no surprise, though, considering the profound effect Princess Luna just had on all of them. How had Anonymous managed to just carry on a normal conversation after that? Was he that focused?

Or had he not even been affected?

And what about The Princess’ guards!

Were they simply inured to it after so many experiences?

These questions gnawed at Honour’s mind as she unwrapped the hayburger in front of her.

Her Majesty hadn't had anything specific for the Royal Engineer to do; she admitted to having enough troubles of her own just trying to figure out how to sway the holdouts to abandon the old ways. All she wanted from him -- and, by extension, from Honour, Sparkshower, and Glamerspear -- was to try Ebonshield out, and see if a batpony could work.

Despite Honour’s previous pessimism, now that she had some of Ebonshield’s backstory at least, she thought that maybe it could.

With no clear direction to follow, the Royal Engineer had given them an extended lunch and even cancelled the Sergeant's afternoon shift, saying it would be better served ‘allowing you all to get to know each other.’ It was a good idea, Honour had to admit, and Ebonshield immediately brought up her proposal for some joint training. Not a bad idea, either, although at the time, the corporal’s head was swimming so full of questions that she couldn’t imagine she’d get anything productive done besides pumping the Sergeant for all of the inside details about batpony society. After all, now she was in 'the know' about them, and Luna had left a lot of details unspoken, simply telling 'Stellar Ebonshield' that she could freely share anything she wanted with the four of them.

But since Ebonshield still couldn't show her face -- or her wings -- around the canteen without causing a ruckus, the Royal Engineer had suggested just ordering something in. When Honour had informed him the Guard wouldn't normally pay for that, he said to put it on his account.

"The Princesses have given me a salary, though I can't fathom what for, since almost everything I could want is already provided. We might as well use some of that for you all to say 'hello' to each other anew."

And he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer, not even to his order that they take an unheard-of two-hour lunch break.

"I'll send off the letter myself. The postmaster's not even outside the palace walls."

So there they all were, sitting around the card-table in the common area of their shared living quarters, each one with a STAGECOACH(™) double-hayburger-with-fries combo sitting in front of them.

There were a thousand questions Honour could ask.

Questions about batpony society, about Ebonshield’s childhood, and her training. About what happened up there when the news hit that Nightmare Moon was defeated. Even about the moon itself; what was it like up there?

The only real problem was, where would she even start?

Across the table from Honour, the no-longer-quite-so-mysterious batpony was about to take her first bite of the sandwich.

"So do you or don't you drink blood?"

And that idiot, 'shoe-as-buck, lead-cone-on-her-horn, spellbound Specialist sitting on Honour’s right had decided to open her mouth and let the words flow out without thinking.

"Lily!!" Even Sparkshower, on the earth pony’s left, scolded her for the question.

Honour shook her head in exasperation. "For buck's sake, Glamerspear."

But the target of her admonishment remained unrepentant. "What? Isn't this tell-all time? Come on, Sparks, don't tell me you haven't been wondering it, too?"

"Well... maybe a bit." Sparkshower shied away from the steely-eyed Ebonshield, embarrassed.

With a raised eyebrow, the Sergeant took a big bite out of her burger, chewing it noisily in Glamerspear's face as she spoke. "Specialist Glamerspear, are you worried that I am later going to sneak into your bedroom and bite you on the neck?"

Finishing the mouthful, she grinned. "... Or are you worried that I already have?"

That just got her a retaliatory cut-eye from the unicorn, and Ebonshield reeled back, laughing. When she was done, she wiped a tear from her eye. "No, Specialist, batponies do not drink blood. We eat food like you."

The Sergeant lifted one hoof in the air. "But I do not blame you for thinking this, because we ourselves have promoted this legend, in order to promote fear. Intimidation is a powerful ally, no?"

After some more squinting to see if Ebonshield was about to spit back out the mortal cuisine, the loud mouthed unicorn relaxed her expression and gave a perfunctory nod, before settling into her own meal. But Sparkshower was not going to let her off that easily.

"I told you that you were being ridiculous!"

Glamerspear leaned both elbows on the table as she tried to manage eating the greasy burger without the use of her telekinesis. "I'm just making sure, is all! Princess Luna said that ponies who fought a thousand years ago passed down legends, didn't she? Who's to say which ones are true or not if we don't ask?"

The armored pegasus sighed and rolled her eyes. "Well, how about the fact that there's no vampires at all, anywhere?"

The unicorn leaned forward. "There could be. There's vampire bats, after all."

Honour had heard enough. "Those are fruit bats, Glamerspear. And they just make a mess of orchards and berry patches."

With a mouthful of hayburger, and a sandwich precariously perched on hooves that weren’t entirely used to having to actually hold things, Glamerspear just shrugged.

After a few seconds, Honour went back to her own thoughts. What to ask next?

"So what do you eat? On the moon, I mean?"

Once again, the conversation had been steered by the loudest and least-restrained among them.

Ebonshield wiped her mouth and put her sandwich back down. "Some things can be made to grow there. Potatoes, cabbage, fava beans, peppers... mushrooms grow underground, as well."

Reaching into her box of fries, she held one up for everypony to see. "But everything winds up tasting dusty if you eat it as-is -- dusty, and dry. On the moon, we have to put ground hot peppers on all of the things just to make them edible. In the food, the heat is all you can taste. In the kitchen, the spice is all you can smell."

She shook her head. "Things here in Equestria are much tastier. Especially the potatoes! I did not know they could be so delicious until I first came here!"

Popping the fry in her mouth, she appeared to genuinely savor it, before glancing around the table at everypony. "Do not let any batpony tell you otherwise -- they’re filthy lying bastardos like that, claiming that the spices make this better. It's foolishness; the seasoning is just to cover the poor quality of the food."

She shrugged and went for another. "But when this is all you have, you get used to them. And the hot sauces here are, I admit, quite bland by comparison."

On Honour’s left, Sparkshower was listening with eager interest, trying to smile while chewing. To Honour’s right, Glamerspear was nodding, her head slightly cocked to better hear while she ate. Well, at least everypony was getting along so far. Even if Glam had started with some nonsense, at least it broke the ice, and there would be plenty of time to learn the answers to the big questions.

"Okay, but what do you drink?"

‘Oh boy, here comes another hard-hitting question.’

That one seemed to somewhat confuse the Sergeant. "We drink water? There is ice beneath the surface."

Hopefully, Glamerspear was running out of food related questions.

"... We make some liquors from fermented vegetables as well, of course."

That got the saltine's attention. "Oh, yeah?"

"Certainly. Gin, whiskey, and the like, usually from potatoes, are common. If you want something stronger, a shot of 70-proof 'Maestro Cazador,' with the herbs and spices, serves as an after-supper digestivo."

Honour’s out-on-the-town unicorn seemed impressed and intrigued. "Hunh. I wonder if that last one mixes well."

Ebonshield shrugged. "If you are interested, I shall bring you a bottle from the rookery, and you may try him yourself."

Glamerspear was smiling -- that was the first time she'd done that with the Sergeant, as far as Honour knew.

"Aw yeah, drinks at the barracks, that's what I'm talking about!"

Honour was not sure if that was a great idea. Actually, she was pretty sure it wasn't.

But maybe just once... after they’d all had some good physical training together later that day, maybe a few drinks together would be a good idea.

The unicorn licked her lips and leaned forward again. "... What do you think of Equestrian liquor?"

Ebonshield finished another bite of her hayburger. "I cannot say that I have really sampled it."

The junior soldier raised a hoof in confusion. "But you've gone out clubbing twice already?"

Honour’s batpony shrugged her shoulders. "Oh, yes, but I do not really care much for the drinking. I am there for the colts, darling."

Tapping a hoof to her chin, she reflectively looked up at the ceiling. "You know, that one from last night may not have been much of a charmer in the morning, but he was very drunk when I brought him home, and it is nice when they are still young and don't have trouble performing from too much alcohol, yes?"

Over to Honour’s left, Sparkshower almost choked on her hayburger, and the corporal saw her cheeks go red.

Glamerspear just leaned back, turning up her snout. "I prefer older gentlecolts myself. The ones who know how to handle their drink... and their mare."

Typical answer, for a self-professed saltine. Well, at least they won't be rivals over a colt if they ever find themselves at the same club.

‘Hmm.’

Unless it was a particularly charming, young and wealthy noblepony.

Ebonshield smiled. "Then you can have them, Specialist Glamerspear, and leave all the bashful young studs for me. I enjoy the challenge of breaking in the wild ones."

Glamerspear snorted. "Yeah, what's the 'wildest' you've had to tame?"

‘Oh, no. You are not spending meet-and-greet-your-batpony-comrade lunchtime discussing colts.’

"A gentlemare does not kiss and tell, Specialist."

'Yes, exactly that; shut this conversation down, Sergeant.’

"... But anyways, I always think more of the ones that got away."

‘Damn it.’

The pegasus on Honour’s left, her wings unfolded, leaned in with her burger in her hooves. "Like who?"

‘Et tu, Sparkshower?’

Ebonshield grinned. "Well, for example, yesterday I propositioned a certain charming, well-dressed, and well-mannered young gentlecolt who looked like he could take a mare hard against the wall, and then all the way up her. The kind of colt you could take to bed three times in a night, and he still wants more, the poor starving potrito. The kind who chomps at the bit and bites at the reins when you hold him back, and whinnies loudly when you let him loose."

As Honour chewed, Sparkshower's wings seemed to stretch out a little further.

Really? Just talking euphemistically about sex did that to her? When Honour talked to her about saltines and salt-licks, should she have also mentioned the birds and the bees?

Meanwhile, Glamerspear was on a different edge. "Hah! Where'd you meet this wonderstud, Sarge? And tell me you at least got his name!"

Coyly, Ebonshield shrank into her shoulders, wrapping her wings around her. "Of course I spoke with him. He was a good conversationalist. This makes me wonder if he also knows how to 'pillow talk.' You know, the experience is so much better when they know what to say, yes?"

Glamerspear chuckled and nodded, but Sparkshower just leaned in. "What's... What's 'pillow talk'?"

Okay, pressing need to have some serious conversations aside, this was actually pretty funny. Honour looked down at her burger to avert her eyes, and she had to put a hoof up to her mouth to hide her sucked-in-lips as she tried to avoid laughing.

And Ebonshield took Sparkshower's hoof in hers, like an unrestrained aunt explaining sexual liberation to a foal.

It was priceless.

"Oh, darling. This is when a colt whispers sweet things in your ear -- on the subject of what the two of you are going to be doing later, back in bed."

If Sparkshower's wings opened up any wider, they were going to knock something over. And if she got any redder, she’d have to have the coat color on her ID card changed.

"Uh... And this colt, he did that? Even though he, uh... 'got away'?"

Sparkshower's new aunt shook her head. "Oh, no, Specialist. He only looked and sounded like he could, in my head. But sometimes, the imagination is better than the real thing. Perhaps he would not have been so good at this. This would have been fun to find out the truth, though. Maybe I will see him again. And maybe if he is not so good, I can teach him."

As the wheels in Sparkshower's head turned, Glamerspear intruded further into the center of the table, laying out a demanding hoof.

"Okay, so what did he look like?"

Ebonshield once again played at being coy. "If I tell you what did he look like, you'll know exactly who this is."

The more she denied the unicorn, the hotter Glamerspear started burning up inside. It was fantastic; the Sergeant had read her perfectly. Just like with the chewing-out yesterday, she definitely knew how to handle ponies. This was the best entertainment Honour’d had in weeks. Hiding her smirk, she reached for her grape soda and took a drink through the straw.

The unicorn had reached her limit. "So tell me who it is, already!"

Finally, theatrically rolling her vertical-slit eyes, the batpony rolled her shoulders and folded her wings back up.

"He is our VIP, Anonymous."

Honour didn’t see Sparkshower's jaw drop, or Glamerspear's eyes go wide. She was too busy spitting her drink all over the table.

Choking, the corporal wiped her mouth with her hoof.

Sergeant Ebonshield looked at Honour with a wry smile. “Yes, this was also his reply."

Next Chapter: Chapter 38 Estimated time remaining: 31 Hours, 11 Minutes