Artemis Sparkshower

---

There were a lot of worries and concerns juggling around in Artemis’ head right now.

Foremost among them was the unknown condition of her friend and comrade, Specialist Lily Glamerspear. She’d helped her over to the barracks medical ward last night, but once her condition had been assessed, the doctors had whisked her away, condemning her to the waiting-room.

She had lingered there for hours, moving between the waiting room seats or pacing back and forth on the tiled floors, before they finally ordered the pegasus to return to her quarters; Glamerspear was going to be kept overnight. They'd answered no questions in the meantime, except to say that 'her situation was under control,' which just left Artemis worried about what was actually going on. She wanted to go visit the infirmary again this morning to check up on her, but with Glamerspear laid up and Sergeant Ebonshield still asleep, Artemis was the only backup pony Corporal Bound had right now, should the Royal Engineer need a second escort.

And speaking of Ebonshield, there was something funny about the way she'd come home last night, but that one wasn't so important.

What was starting to feel really important was the letter Artemis was trying to write to her Puddin'. How best to word his invitation to the Gala? It was a tricky matter; he was just a simple country pony, and big news like this would be quite a shock. But he was her simple country pony, and she didn't want to give him a heart attack or anything!

Now that she thought about it, if Huckleberry Pudding was going to take her to the ball, he'd definitely need a trip to the Bridle Path, or somewhere similar, for a new suit.

Gosh, and what about herself?

She couldn't wear that same ball-gown she’d already worn around Canterlot to the Gala!

She hadn't even thought about how she’d dress.

Add another worry to juggle around in the air.

As Artemis stared, frustrated, at the blank sheet of paper before her, quill in hoof, she felt the worry-balls start to drop one by one.

Just at the moment when they all crashed down to the ground, the front door opened.

Turning sideways in the chair, Artemis looked up and was overjoyed to see Glamerspear walk into the common-room of their shared quarters, looking a bit tired. But what was that contraption on her head?

"Hey, Sparks." Her normally energetic unicorn sister-in-arms shut the door, walked over to the sofa, and clambered up into it.

Too dumbstruck by the casual entrance and strange new headwear she was sporting, Artemis couldn’t do much more than stare.

"Um... Good morning, Lily."

With an awkward grin, she pointed both forehooves at the grey metal cone surrounding her horn, with its narrow end at her head that gradually flared outwards and upwards into the air, almost like a large collar.

"Like my new hat?"

Frowning, Artemis shook her head. "What is it?"

Glamerspear laughed. "This is just an E-collar, Sparks -- an energy collar, made of lead to block any residual magical radiation. The real show is inside -- look!"

Having said that, she tilted her head downward and slightly to the side, giving Artemis a good look inside the cone. Her horn was still there -- thank Celestia! -- but there was a pair of black metal rings, joined by a chain, placed around its tip and base. Glamerspear jiggled her head around a bit, jostling the chain -- but the clamps held fast. Three screws around the periphery seemed to be what was securing each of the shackles to the horn underneath.

"I don't understand what I'm looking at."

She lifted her head again to look her in the eyes. "I've been spellbound. Doctor's orders. The iron fetters, properly tuned and placed at opposite ends of a unicorn's horn, completely suppress all magical energy output. The E-collar is there just as a safety net in case anything still leaks out, to keep it from messing with my head..."

She shrugged.

"... Apparently, that MXP Totem was keeping me just at the edge of serious mana-burn levels this whole time, so even thinking about casting a spell was enough to push things over into the danger zone. And the mana suppressant potions weren't designed to hold against sustained mana-toxicity levels like that -- so, I get spellbound. Normally they only do this to unicorns who go cuckoo or turn criminal."

Taking a deep breath, she pawed at the sofa cushion beside her with a hoof.

"... They had to call in some experts from the Schola Magia, apparently. Nopony's seen a case quite like this before."

Rolling her eyebrows, Glamerspear sucked in her lips, then popped them with a smack.

"... Guess I'm gonna wind up in some medical textbook in a few years."

She sounded really embarrassed.

"I wish I could have been there for you, Lily. They chased me away and told me I couldn't come in."

Glamerspear let out a sharp laugh. "Hah! Thanks, Sparks, but I'm not really upset about all this..."

She gestured at all the metal contraptions on her head. "... It is what it is: treatment. I'll be going back every evening for them to take measurements to see if it's time to pull it off."

Shrugging again, she lifted her eyebrows and looked around awkwardly.

"... I just feel kinda... useless... without any magic, ya know?"

Artemis smiled sympathetically. "Well, you've got to get better, or else who will Anonymous turn to when he needs somepony swatted from the sky, right?"

Her unicorn pal just nodded her head, and Artemis could hear the spellbinder chain rattle away inside her E-collar cone.

"Sure, sure..."

Casting a glance around the room, probably surprised by how Corporal Bound managed to get everything back in order, she took a deep breath and looked back up at the pegasus.

"... So, anything happen while I was gone?"

She'd only been out of her sight for at most twelve hours. But she supposed there had been some news.

"Well..." Leaning over sideways to get closer to her, Artemis lowered her voice, staring at their newest comrade's bedroom door.

"... I don't think Sergeant Ebonshield came home alone last night."

Glamerspear's eyes went wide, and her mouth dropped open. She scrambled over to the end of the sofa closest to Artemis and leaned over, whispering. "What?!"

Artemis shrugged. "I heard four pairs of hoofsteps come in last night. Although it was kinda hard to tell, since they weren't walking very steady."

Lily scrunched up her nose. "She's bringing her coltfriend into our dormitory for conjugal visits? As if having one batpony around wasn't enough!"

That was uncalled-for, but before she could either scold her or continue, there was a creaking noise from the far side of the room.

Both of them gasped, and Glamerspear peeked her head just barely around the edge of the sofa to covertly spy on the Sergeant's bedroom door. It wasn’t actually very stealthy, what with the huge metal cone sticking out from her head.

The door into the blackened room opened, and out stepped...

A young, pastel-blue earth pony with a messy black mane, dressed in a black suit-jacket on top of a wrinkled green shirt, with his top buttons undone, and an untied necktie slung over his shoulders.

That couldn’t possibly be her coltfriend. What was he doing in her room?

The obvious answer had Artemis growing rosy in the cheeks.

After carefully closing the door, he turned around, revealing his baggy, bloodshot eyes.

And then he suddenly realized he was not alone in the common room. "Oh... uh, hi. Um... she's still, like, asleep? So, uh, you know... shhhh."

Glamerspear shot Artemis a glance, her expression like she couldn’t believe what she was seeing.

Heedless to her reaction, the colt started to tip-hoof his way toward the main door. Before he reached it, Sergeant Ebonshield's door opened once again. And the Sarge herself stood in the doorway, wearing a slinky, translucent pink negligee, and looking just as ruffled and hung-over as the colt, with last night's makeup still on her face.

‘Wow, that's quite the outfit.’

Artemis felt the rosiness in her cheeks intensify.

Ebonshield shot a smile at the two of them. "Good morning, Specialists..." Then she stood up on her hind legs, facing the door-frame and stretching up her hooves into its upper corner, looking over sideways at the colt. "...and buenos días, mi amor."

Artemis swore she could hear him say something like 'duck,' but then he turned around with a fake-looking grin on his face. "Hey, uh, good morning, um, uh, er..."

That was the Sergeant's cue to spread her bat-like wings, staring at him seductively with smoky, violet orbs. "Ebonshield, cariño."

Artemis saw his eyes bulge as he stared at her wings, and there was a bead of sweat on his scruffy brow. "Right, Ebonshield, yeah... I'm, uh, Charles Ironrail, hi."

She took the opportunity to shift sideways, exposing her front toward him, and dropping one hoof casually by her hips, while the other was held up high. "Sí, I remember your name, Carlos. Aren't you going to stay for breakfast?" She started to run the same hoof slowly up her front, slowly batting her mascara-thickened eyelashes at him.

‘That's... that's definitely something.’

Trying again to force a smile, the colt nervously backed up towards the door. "Uh, hah, uh... no, you know, uh it's super late, and I had a great time last night, and I'm really sorry about this, but I've really got to, uh, bail..." Grasping the door with one hoof, even as she licked her lips, he spurted out the rest in a single breath. "... You know, babe, uh, what with the uh, bat wings and all, which I didn't really notice in the club, and uh, I think I'm a bit out of your age range, anduhyeahbye!"

With that, he ducked out the door, and Artemis listened to him gallop full-tilt away down the hallway. He didn't even fully close it behind him. ‘How rude.’

Sighing, the Sergeant got back down on all fours, stretched out and yawned, then walked over to gently push the door shut. "Ah, well. They may not always be the gentlecolts in the morning."

Glamerspear stood up in her seat, exploding into emotion as she leaned on the back of the sofa.

"Are you kidding?! That pump-and-dump chump just called you an old mare!"

Shrugging, Ebonshield walked over to the washroom. "So? I have already obtained what I wanted out of him -- even if I was hoping for a little more in the morning."

‘Oh, my... Well, that just confirmed it.’

Artemis felt her blushing reach maximum levels.

Surprisingly, Glamerspear didn’t seem to be falling into the accusation that their batpony associate was actually interested in that young colt's blood. But she was still gawking in disbelief at the Sergeant's casual handling of everything.

"You don't care that your one-night-stand just trashed you like that?"

With a smile, the Eb raised an amused eyebrow. "No? What matter? I went to the club last night looking for some companionship. I found some, if admittedly in the bottom of a bottle of cider at the end of the night. I know I am foolish to even wonder if there is still attraction in the morning, but there is no harm in the checking -- unless you allow this to hurt you, which certainly I do not. Clearly that niño does not know what a real mare can do for him."

That just set Glamerspear sitting back down again, flabbergasted.

"... I apologize if my 'date' disturbed you gentlemares. It would be best if I take a shower, now. I am sure the combination of smells on me does not make for an odour pleasant."

As she entered the washroom and shut the door, Artemis covertly sniffed the air. There was indeed more than a whiff of cider in the air, mixed with body sweat, and another smell she couldn't quite place...

Until she did, which pushed her cheeks past their previous height of rosiness.

She could hear the shower turn on, even as the gears started to spin in her head. That would explain all that flapping and shaking she’d heard last night.

And the grunts.

And the hissing.

And the moans.

‘Whooo, is it hot in here or is it just me?’

She stared blankly down at the empty sheet of paper on the table. It was impossible to write her letter to Huckleberry Pudding now. Even if she could, instead of the Gala invitation, all she could think of was that pretty red barn of his.

And him taking her out back behind it.

And him roughly tossing the pegasus backwards into the hay pile, her forehooves drawn up to her chest and her wings erect.

Then he would fling off his straw hat, spit out the long blade of grass in his mouth, tear off his blue overalls, and leap in on top of her, his brown hair rubbing against her brow as she hooked her forelegs over his shoulders, his taut, muscled farmer's chest rubbing against her chest tuft as she locked her hind legs around his firm, slim hips, and then...

"Sparks, for Celestia's sake, would you get your damn wing-boner out of my face?"

‘Oh, hailstorms!’

Glamerspear was sitting on the sofa, frowning at Artemis, hooves crossed in front of her, and the pegasus’ primary feathers were pressing into her snout.

‘Wow. I didn't realize my wings could extend that far.’

It actually took a concerted effort to fold everything up once more. She felt a bit of pain in her shoulders from the extreme extension.

"Sorry, Lily."

Uncrossing her hooves, her comrade sighed, blinked, and then stared dumbly forward at the coffee table, like she was trying to puzzle something out.

"... Is something else wrong?"

She nodded her head repeatedly, then turned up to look at Artemis, still nodding. "I think I agree with Ebonshield, Sparks."

She furrowed her brow. "Is that a problem?"

Her nods turned into shakes. "I don't know. I just can't believe that I'm taking sides with a batpony..." She shrugged. "... I mean, I would have beat his ass for saying something like that, casual encounter or no, but I kinda admire her laissez-faire handling of it, y'know?"

"Is that what that's called? A 'casual encounter'?"

Glamerspear smiled. "Sure, a casual encounter. A one-night stand. Wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am. Dine 'n' dash. Meet 'n' greet. Hump 'n' dump. Buck 'n' Duck. There's plenty of slang terms for it..."

She lifted an eyebrow and her smile turned into a smirk. "... Why, you interested? Want to go out clubbing tonight?"

Before Artemis could open her mouth, Glamerspear waved a hoof. "... I'm just teasing, Sparks. I know you're joined at the hip to your country colt. Besides, I'm not gonna be making any moves, in a nightclub or otherwise, with all this junk stuck on my head."

There was a knock at the main door, and Glamerspear sighed. "... I bet that's Mister Congeniality himself again. He's probably forgotten something in his haste to leave."

She looked up at the pegasus. "... You'd better answer it, Sparks; I'd just sock him in the teeth for what he said."

Getting to her hooves, Artemis walked over to the door. Expecting the same dishevelled young stud, she opened the door wide, barely paying attention.

Two piercing yellow slits stared out from the darkness before her.

She stifled a gasp, reeling backwards in shock.

There was a steamy snort from a pair of nostrils, and then a flash of white teeth.

It actually took a second for Artemis’ eyes to adjust and make out the shadowy figure at the door. Underneath pitch-black leather armor that tightly wrapped around his eyes and snout, and clothed under an equally black cloak that shrouded his head and draped down to envelop the carpet, and, indeed, the whole doorway in shadow, the imposingly rigid, black colt that stood before her was, unmistakably, one thing she absolutely did not expect to find knocking at the door just now:

Another batpony!

Showing his ivory teeth again, he spoke with a heavy accent, like Ebonshield's, but far thicker, which was emphasized by his deep, rich voice.

"Ay yam Marcos, and ay yam herrre to see Sargento Ébanoscudo - Serrrgeant Ebonshield."

---

Suggested interlude music: Cliff Eidelman - 'Guess Who's Coming', from 'Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country' [1991]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1_zEGmwGK0

Next Chapter: Chapter 34 Estimated time remaining: 31 Hours, 57 Minutes