Everyday Life With Guardsmares
Chapter 30
Previous Chapter Next ChapterLily Glamerspear
Recommended background music: Rik Schafer - 'Disturbed and Twisted', from 'Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines' [2004]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwBORt1USic

"Hey Sparks, do you think you could trade me a shift next month?"
Artemis hadn't come back upstairs at lunchtime; the Royal Engineer had taken her out for lunch instead. Apparently they'd 'jogged' halfway around the city before realizing it was lunch-time, which meant that when she’d finally shown up after the end of her shift, Lily’s only chance to make her move would be right then and there.
It was the most difficult thing Lily Glamerspear had ever done.
The cream-colored pegasus looked up at her from the other end of the sofa.
"Sure, what day?"
Maybe it was just the horn juice screwing with her, or maybe it was some lingering effect of the mana-burn, but she felt like she was sweating buckets. The sofa was going to be soaked when she got up.
"The fourteenth. It's a Saturday, I know. I've, uh, got kind of a private engagement that evening. Maybe you have a weekend I can trade for it afterwards?"
Lily knew full well that she did.
As if she was embarrassed to even ask, the unicorn grinned and awkwardly rubbed her shoulder. With a smile and a nod, Sparkshower got up from the sofa. Over at the card-table, Honour was still buried deep in that huge book of hers. It was even worse having her in the room, but what else could Lily do? She had to get this done now, before it's too late.
Sparkshower walked over to the calendar.
Time seemed to stand still as Sparkshower lifted up the current page to examine the duty roster for April.
‘Come on, come on, come on…’
Lily glanced, almost angrily, over at Honour.
She was still deep in that book.
‘Well, she'd better stay that way!’
Nosey mare ought to keep her snout out of Lily’s business.
Over at the calendar wall, Sparkshower let go of that month's page, and it seemed to crash down back onto the wall with a heavy thud, like thunder in the distance. She turned around incredibly slowly. And her head somehow preceded her body, staring at Lily even as her torso and neck were still facing away. She pictured her furious, her teeth bared, wings extended -- except they were leathery bat wings, instead of pretty feathered ones. Artemis opened her mouth, and suddenly fire shot from it. The flames reached across the room to lick at Lily’s body, and she could feel the heat of them. But she was frozen in place, her muscles locked up, and eyes fixed into the pegasus’ gaze.
Sparkshower spoke in an unnaturally low voice, and the whole palace rumbled with each syllable. "It looks like I'm on for the twenty-first in the evening, same as you the week before..."
The words came out so slowly that Lily struggled to make out each one. And all the while, the far end of the room seemed to twist itself into a spiral. Since when was the washroom door in the ceiling?
"...Sure, I can do that no problem!"
Glamerspear blinked, and Sparkshower was standing immediately in front of her now. She was smiling at Lily, but then her eyelids opened wider and wider, stretching back across her brow and over across her head.
Lily tried to gasp, but before she could make a sound, Artemis had peeled herself right open.
‘What the buck!? Somepony, make it stop!’
In spite of the horror of what she was witnessing, Lily felt herself smile and heard herself speak. "Thanks, Sparks. You're a pal."
All of a sudden there was a sharp pain at her left temple. She lifted up a hoof to rub it, only to find there was something there. Glancing over sideways, she realized it was a whole spear, sticking out of her head.
It was glowing, it was translucent, and it was teal.
It was one of hers!
And there's something at the far end of it. The shaft stretched out past the couch, almost reaching the far wall, which had moved itself a hundred yards away. Lily didn’t dare move her head an inch, lest she knock it into something. She just had to reach up, and reel it in to find out what was at the end. The spear turned to rope in her hooves, and she tugged it closer and closer, bringing the far wall with her.
It was something white and fluffy-looking.
‘What is that?’
Just when she’d almost got it close enough to take a good look, there was an unearthly crack from beside her. Corporal Bound had twisted her neck three-hundred-and-sixty degrees around, and bent it over backward and away from her book. She looked at Glamerspear with two eyes, and then over at Sparkshower with another pair.
There was a pulsing, pumping noise coming from somewhere, like the bellows of a forge. Even with a spear sticking out of her head and two comrades that seem to have suddenly taken contortionism to a new extreme, somehow this sound was even more horrifying.
It was so regular, rushing in and out in heavy throbs. The whole room seemed to beat along with it; everything got close when it pushed out, and then backed off when it drew in. She couldn’t even think, it was so loud.
But when Corporal Bound opened her mouth, it suddenly stopped. "You know, Sparkshower..."
‘No, no no…’
"... that's the day..."
‘NO, NO, NO!’
"... of the Grand..."
‘Why is it suddenly so hard to breathe?’
"... Galloping..."
‘youcantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreatheyoucantbreathe’
"... Gala."
Gasping for air as if she’d been held underwater, Lily drew in a huge breath.
‘The mana suppressants!’
She needed another dose, right the buck now! Scrambling forwards, Lily flailed her hooves at the potion satchel sitting on the coffee table. In the blink of an eye, she snatched up one of the vials, popped the cork, and threw it back like a cheap shot. The cold fluid dripped down her throat, and the pain -- and the spear -- seemed to disappear.
The room untwisted itself, and Corporal Bound turned her head back the right way again.
Even Sparkshower had her body the right side out now, but she was giving Lily a look.
A very angry look.
"IT IS?!"
‘Buck.’
Ebonshield
Sergeant Ebonshield, was so far having a first shift most enjoyable. After her little discussion with the Great Lord Anonymous, she was feeling excited. Yet what thing particular excited her the most?
The prospect of further nights enjoying the life of metropolitan Canterlot probably ranked the highest.
But she had to admit that she was also eager to see what new prospects awaited her in the service of the Engineer Royal. Who knows? Perhaps he would even prove to be a reasonable fighter? There would be benefits to a new sparring partner, at least.
‘Hmmm…’
She should discuss the possibility of training with the other members of the 'cuaternio'.
No, the quaternion -- that was the word in the Equestrian tongue, she remembered this, now.
Either way, they should all to train together certainly at least once or twice a month. Artemis did say that the Caporal Bound had regretted that before the Battle at Newstirrup Bridge.
Yet why had she done nothing? Did the Guardia Real not expect their VIP serviceponies to conduct some maneuvers with each other? How else were they going to fight together to defend their Lord or Lady?
Questions for later, though they might have been answered had she attended at the training V-I-P. Although actually finishing the course was, of course, out of the question. If not for other reasons, then at least because she had better things to do.
For example, to try out another nightclub tonight.
Somepony last night had recommended a place called 'The Stables,' in the street 'Thin,' near the square 'Pachyderm & Palace.' Reportedly, this attracted a livelier crowd than the one which she had tried last night, called 'Tapestry.'
'Tapestry' was probably a place perfectly enjoyable on a Friday or Saturday night. But she still needed a home after sunset for the other five nights of the week. And, since the Engineer Royal did not seem to have taken any real offence at her suggestions, she would have the opportunity to find one. She could hear already the music pumping in her ears, smell the cider and the sweat, and feel the wonderful warm heat of so many bodies pressed together.
And always the thought tantalizing that one of those bodies out there might belong to her, that night.
Ahhhh...
But for now, though, things were quiet. Her charge was at his desk, hunched over a stack of papers, one hand on his forehead, and the other scribbling furiously away with a quill. Even here over by the door, she could hear him muttering the numbers under his breath.
The work must be very important. Every now and then, he had to reach over to grab another sheet to refer to.
No books, though -- just papers. And some of them were quite large, folded up like maps.
He was deep in thought when there was suddenly a loud thud coming from the floor above.
Instinctively, her head pivoted up to try to suss out the source, but she was indistinct.
Nothing had crashed through the ceiling.
Somepony must have just tripped and fallen down in the hallway upstairs, or perhaps accidentally knocked over a piece of furniture.
She was about to dismiss the sound and settle back in, when there is another boom -- and what sounds like a heavy hoofsteps. Squinting, she stared up once more, swivelling her ears around forward. Perhaps if she flew up, she could get a better sense for what was occurring...
But that would probably disturb the Great Lord in his work.
Not to mention, violate his privacy -- the movable partition wall that divided the chambers in two separated off his bed chambers, but the partition, she was only about eight hooves high, whereas the ceiling must be thirty or forty.
As Ebonshield was pondering how to investigate, she started to hear the voices.
Two of them...
No, three, and they are now shouting at quite loudly, though still not loud enough for her to make anything out.
"Hmm. Sounds like somepony's having an argument..."
Over at his desk, the Engineer Royal had paused in his writing.
He gestured up at the source of the disruption.
"... What's up there, actually? I've never been upstairs."
As a recent immigrant to the palace, with the passages identical and the layout confusing, Ebonshield had to think about that question for a moment. The answer, when she came, had her feeling enveloped in a cold shadow.
"They are the rooms housing the members of your quaternion, Great Lord."
Anonymous frowed. "Really? You're lodged directly above this room?"
"Yes, Great Lord."
"I hope nothing is wrong."
So did she.
Just then, there was another boom -- accompanied by a crash.
Ebonshield nickered, and was about to say something, when there was a shout from upstairs which was loud enough to be understood, even though the ceiling.
~"... AT LEAST I'M NOT MAKING FRIENDS WITH THE BAT-PONY!"~
Inhaling deeply, Ebonshield rudely failed to look her Lord in the eyes even as she addressed him. "If the Great Lord would permit my absence for but a moment, I will investigate this disturbance."
Gracefully exiting the room and shutting the door behind her, she broke into a silent but rapid flight, going straight for the staircase.
‘Somepony upstairs will answer for this.’
With the Royal Engineer's chambers behind her, she could not see him pick his quill up and sharpen the instrument with his knife.
As Ebonshield made for the stairs, she was mostly too far away to hear the rest of the argument. For the sake of her unit, she did not hear the shouted replies that came after a few more heated, but comparatively quiet exchanges.
~"... BUT YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE ANONYMOUS! ... "~
She certainly could not see Anonymous, the Royal Engineer of Equestria frown as the indistinct, muffled shouting continued unabated. Putting down his quill and knife, he looked up at the ceiling, furrowed his brow, and then got to his feet.
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