Rainbooms Watches My Favorite Death Battle Episodes!
Chapter 17: Deadpool vs Deathstroke
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As usually for the high schoolers, the day has ended for everyone to enjoy their afternoon off to do whatever they like especially for a certain group of girls and a boy about to enjoy another favorite episode of Death Battle.
Although Sunset and Flash have come home a little early than everyone else to do a little something first.
(Short Lemon/Sex Alert: Scroll Down If You're Younger than 15-16 to Skip It)
"Damn Sunset, just couldn't hold it in, could you?" Flash chuckled while he and Sunset are naked together on her bed, and he is doing the pile drive on her.
"It's your fault for making me want you more! Teasing my body whenever we have class together! I just couldn't hold it in anymore!" Sunset moaned smiling.
"Yeah, that is my fault. You're just so sexy and… and awesome!" Flash complimented.
Flash thrust his hips ramming his 17-inch cock harder into Sunset as the tip of the cock is hitting all of her weak spots including the womb at the end, each impact on the womb causes jolts of pleasure coursing through her body and she becomes crazy arouse of this.
"Man, I always believe our first sex together would feel so good!" Flash moaned happily.
Oh yeah, it's also their first sex together too, crazy timing, right?
"YES! I want to feel every each of you in my fucking pussy to fucking rape me until I can't feel my body anymore!" Sunset demanded sexually.
Flash looks down seeing Sunset's breasts bouncing like crazy and latch his hands to grab onto them causing her to squeal loud, this is more than what she could have imagined as her pussy is cumming like crazy from the intense love pleasure ramming into her like a human jackhammer.
"Damn Flash, this is too much! I'm cumming so much!" Sunset moaned.
"Sorry, couldn't resist wanting to feel every inch of you!" Flash groped strong onto the big melons feeling his fingers are sinking in.
Sunset holds up her arms to her boyfriend wanting some more love as he does so, leaning forward and down to her face and pressing his lips onto hers for them to have their passionate kiss, and with his hands occupied on her breasts, Sunset wraps her legs around his waist to have him fuck her closer and harder.
"Sunset, I'm about to cum right now!" Flash alerted, thinking about taking his cock out.
"Do it inside, I want you to do me inside!" Sunset begged sexually.
"Are you sure?" Flash asked surprise.
"Do it NOW!" Sunset shouted sexually and kissed him again.
Flash decided to go with it seeing how sexy hot she is being right now, thrusting his hips faster with the feeling of his cock's limit as he tries to hold it off for a few more moments until he slammed into her one last time letting out his big white load making her scream in pleasure.
"Wow, so much is coming in." Sunset giggled lewd and her body twitches a little.\
(Lemon/Sex End)
"We should get clean up before the others arrive." Flash stated.
"Yeah, yeah, just let me put my head together." Sunset nodded, sighing with a smile that she just did her first sex with Flash on her bed.
After getting themselves settle from the intense first sex and their bodies to rest up enough as they hurry to clean their messes, hopefully the others don't notice the odd smell before the Rainbooms arrived with two extra faces coming in.
"Hey guys, hope you don't mind that we brought Lyra and Sweetie Drop to watch the episode with us." Twilight said the two girls as they walk in.
"When I overheard you guys talking about this Death Battle show, it got me curious of what got made you girls so into so much." Sweetie Drop explained.
"Then she told me about it which got me in such a mood to wanting to see this now!" Lyra added exciting.
"Yeah, what they say." Fluttershy said.
"Well, two more wouldn't hurt to have another." Sunset said as everyone got around and look at the TV as she starts the next episode.
Wiz: They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, but sometimes it's nothing but a slap in the face. Such as the case when it comes to these two masked mercenaries.
"So, this one is about mercenaries. Bunch of rude men for money." Rarity scoffed.
"Oh, you think so, huh?" A man said surprising Rarity as she knows that wasn't anyone here.
"D-Did you all hear th-that." Rarity asked feeling a bit scared and leaned onto her girlfriend, Applejack.
"There, there, Rarity, I'm sure it was just the… wind." Applejack tried to comfort.
"Or could be a new friend." Pinkie winked at the fourth wall.
Boomstick: Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth.
"That way looks a bit funny." Lyra commented.
Wiz: And Deathstroke, the Terminator.
"And that one looks more serious than Coach Ironwill." Sweetie Drop added.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle.
Deadpool
Boomstick: You see him on T-Shirts, Internet memes, and EVERYWHERE you look at nerd conventions.
"Wow, this character must be quite the fame guy to get that many stuff and fans." Lyra said.
"Yet he feels annoying for some reason." Rarity raised an eyebrow.
Wiz: But the story behind this popular anti-hero isn't as lighthearted as his joking nature would lead you to believe.
"Like what? He was gonna die form cancer?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Background
Real Name: Wade Winston Wilson
Height: 6'2" |1.88m
Weight: 210 lbs|95 kg
Place of Birth: Canada
Aliases: Merc with a Mouth. Regenerating Degenerate. Ninja Spider-Man (Applejack finds that a little funny).
Lives with a blind elderly woman (Fluttershy worries)
An even more cliched cosplay subject than the Joker
Wiz: Wade Winston Wilson was a globetrotting mercenary looking for his chance to become the world's next greatest superhero. Then he was diagnosed with cancer, which hit him like a flaming semi-truck falling on his face.
"Oh…" Rainbow Dash now felt bad for him.
Boomstick: That's... oddly specific.
"And hurtful." Fluttershy pointed out.
Wiz: Facing the inevitability of death, Wade gave up. He abandoned his heroic dreams, stopped his chemo treatments, and dumped his girlfriend to free her from the burden of a man doomed to die.
"Oh, how sweet of wanting to protect his love from his death." Sweetie Drop commented.
"Brace yourselves because something like this usually has a deep twist in the characters' life." Twilight informed.
Boomstick: Doomed, until he was offered a cure by Department K, the special weapons development division of the strange, alien world called... Canada.
"Where all the leaves and snow are to be respected as if they were gods with the love of pancakes." Pinkie joked with a salute.
"Don't forget the maple syrup." Flash added making the two laughs.
Boomstick: And by cure, I mean he actually was handed over to the Weapon X program, the same guys who gave Wolverine's bones the old chrome dip. They injected Wade with Wolvie's healing factor.
"Injected him with what?" Spike confused.
Wiz: Which I don't even know if that's possible. Do they have like a spare jar of essence of Wolverine or something?
"Having a sample of a man with healing abilities does help, in a way." Twilight said.
"But something tells me they didn't ask him for his samples nicely." Sunset stated.
Boomstick: With the ability to heal from anything, his body became a surgical playground for Doctor Killbrew and his assistant, Ajax. Just like Operation, only constantly hitting the sides. *buzzer effects* But hey, at least he doesn't have cancer anymore.
"Using him for something inhuman, that's crazy." Sweetie Drop angered.
"But he's all better. Aw, that's nice!" Pinkie smiled.
Wiz: Well, actually, he still does. His cells just regenerate faster than the cancer can kill him. Beneath the red and black spandex, he's basically a giant walking tumor, which can talk... a lot.
Everyone gasps in horror when they showed what Deadpool's face looks like because of the cancer with the healing factor, and most try their best to not vomit on the floor.
"For fuck sake, he can heal from anything but can't fix his face?" Rainbow Dash grossed out.
"Oh dear, I think I'm gonna faint." Rarity fainted with Flash catching her in his arms.
"I bet he tried to get revenge on the guys who made him look like that." Pinkie narrowed her eyes.
Boomstick: AH! KILL IT WITH FIRE! Oh wait, we can't.
"Guess he'll be stuck like that forever." Spike exclaimed.
Wiz: Meanwhile, among Killebrew's other prisoners, a gambling ring was formed. Patients would place bets on each other's survival under the knife.
Boomstick: And these bets were placed of what they called "The Deadpool". ...Get it? 'Cause it's kinda where his name comes from? Oh, you'll see.
"I guess that's one way to pass the time." Applejack said while fanning Rarity with her hat.
Wiz: Unfortunately for Killebrew, Wade had somehow gotten superhuman strength, speed, and stamina. Because I guess they got a jar filled with that shit, too. He used these skills to kill Ajax and make a dramatic escape. Free at last, his fellow inmates inspired him to take on his now famous namesake...
"Here it comes." Pinkie excited.
"Huh, is it over?" Rarity asked as she starts to wake up.
Boomstick: Deadpool—
Deadpool: DEADPOOOOOL Yeah!
Boomstick and Rainbow Dash: What the heck?!
Deadpool: Oh ho, I'm sorry! Please continue talking about how great I am.
"Is he talking to the hosts?" Sunset wondered.
"You better believe your bacon hair, I am." Deadpool answered, suddenly appearing to everyone much to their shock except Pinkie.
"No way, you're really here!" Pinkie gasped smiling.
"You better believe I am and man, you guys are going to love this episode!" Deadpool smiled.
"But… Eh, huh… How?!" Twilight gestured to the TV.
"Keep watching and you'll see." Deadpool turned Twilight's head to look at the TV again.
Abilities
Superhuman body
Exceptionally skilled with swords and all forms of guns
Mastery in assassination techniques and numerous martial arts
Superb healing factor
Magic satchel: Contains arious items, regardless of continuity-Includes teleportation belt, machine guns, katanas, pistols and other things
Fourth Wall
RAGING SEX MACHINE
Wiz: I was afraid of this. See, Deadpool somehow possess a unique awareness of whatever media he's in. Whether there be comic books, games, TV shows, or an awesome Internet show.
Boomstick: Huh in the what now?
Wiz: Basically, he's a pro at shattering the fourth wall.
"Very good at it too along with this cupcake sweetheart here." Deadpool bragged and pointed at Pinkie.
"Doing what I love to do." Pinkie giggled/
Deadpool: Bingo! Oh hey, Boomstick! Tell your ex-wife I said hello~.
Boomstick: You've got five seconds to get the hell out of here before I blow your head off.
"Going after a man's ex-wife, kinda sounds crazy." Rainbow Dash said.
"Crazy to get some jerking on!" Deadpool stated in a fresh beat tone.
Wiz: Unfortunately, all that would do is piss him off. Bad idea, as Deadpool is a master martial artist, seasoned assassin, and a raging sex machine- what?
"What?" Most of the girls are puzzled of that part.
Deadpool: Yeah, I noticed that you left a few things in the script, so I made some changes. You know, just the important stuff. Like my penis.
"Are you for real?" Sunset deadpanned at Deadpool.
"Don't worry, I'm not going after you girls. Flash is gonna do that." Deadpool said causing some of the girls to blush and Flash feeling embarrassed.
Boomstick: Well, if by raging sex machine, he means getting down with bloated alien, a shape-shifting teenage prostitute, and Death herself, he must have some pretty low standards. That's right, this guy literally tried to stick his dick in Death! Maybe that's why he liked my ex-wife.
"Dude, you and Death together!" Flash shocked.
"Yep, Death is my main sweetheart even though I only be with her when I'm temporary dead though we enjoyed ever second we can." Deadpool smiled.
"Death, the DEATH?" Twilight struggled to process this much information.
"Don't worry, folks. She'll calm down soon." Deadpool said to the readers.
Boomstick: But besides his dick, Deadpool has an arsenal of weaponry he can pull out from absolutely nowhere!
Wiz: This is an animation technique commonly called the Magic Satchel, though its existence as an actual thing is preposterous.
Both Deadpools: Oh yeah? Watch this!
The Deadpool on the TV pulled up an elephant while the Deadpool with the watchers has pulled up a lion.
TV Deadpool: Hey, nice lion!
"Thanks, nice elephant." Deadpool complimented back.
Wiz: I hate you!
Both Deadpools: Oh, I hate you, too.
Boomstick: Me too.
"That wasn't very nice to say to Wiz." Fluttershy scolded softly.
"It's fine, this kind of thing always goes for those two and you mind taking the lion off my hands? Thanks!" Deadpool said with a thumb up, and the lion just growls causing Fluttershy to gulp.
"I don't know if I can handle seeing two of you!" Rarity exclaimed.
"Alright, alright, I'll go, and you'll see the sweet weapons I have." Deadpool smirked before disappearing from sight.
Boomstick: Some of Deadpool's favorite toys include-
Deadpool: My trusty rusty twin katanas, some grenades, my two favorite machine guns (Butter and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter), a teleportation belt, an Infinity Stone that alters continuity... (giddy) Ohoho I can't choose! I love 'em all!
"Of course, a crazy like that would love all those crazy toys." Sweetie Drop rolled her eyes.
Boomstick: Okay that's it, I'm gonna kill him!
Boomstick tries to shoot Deadpool down with his guns, but Deadpool ran off making him miss and shot the screen.
"Sorry Boomstick, but today is not Deadpool hunting season." Pinkie pointed out.
"Oh, good one." Deadpool whispered to Pinkie.
Wiz: Combined, Deadpool's weapons and abilities has helped him to accomplish some amazing feats in spite of his illness.
Strength & Feats
Navigated an obstacle course meant for Iron Man-like suits unscathed
Completely regenerated from a single hand (Pinkie thinks it's very "handy")
Sole person to outwit Taskmaster
Can dodge point-blank machine guns
Killed the Marvel universe
Casually battled Red Hulk
Once became a Herald of Galactus (This worries everyone)
NOT GARBAGE TIER IN MARVEL VS CAPCOM 3
Boomstick: His quick draw's fast enough to beat seven Hydra agents at once. He can decimate legions of armed warriors solo... while talking on the phone. He's the only one to ever outwit Taskmaster, who literally has the power to predict his opponent's moves. And in one instance, he even murdered the ENTIRE Marvel Universe, including the supposedly unkillable Wolverine.
"The same guy Deadpool guy the healing factor from." Fluttershy recalled while stroking the lion who has calm down and rest next to her.
"If he's unkillable, then how did Deadpool kill him at all?" Spike wondered.
"I'm more impressed he was fighting off enemies while on the phone." Sweetie Drop admitted.
"Not to mention outwitting that Taskmaster guy seems impossible to most who fought him." Applejack stated.
Wiz: He did this with a sword made of Carbonadium, an alloy capable of nullifying healing factors. In other words, he cheated.
"Well, that make sense." Twilight rolled her eyes.
Boomstick: He survived skyscrapers collapsing on top of him, having his heart ripped out, his head blown to bits, and even his entire body melted into a puddle.
"Jesus Horse Feathers! Is there nothing that can stop this guy?" Rarity asked.
"Only if Marvel cancels my existence." Deadpool popped up spooking Rarity again before going back down.
Wiz: But his regeneration is also responsible for one of his greatest downfalls. This power has trained him to think he's invincible and has become quite careless in battle.
Boomstick: And that just if his extreme ADHD hasn't already put him into a bind.
"Goes to show even when you have an awesome superpower, you can't get cocky that can have others get the upper hand on you." Sunset stated.
"You hear that, Rainbow Dash?" Applejack narrowed her eyes at Rainbow Dash.
"What?" Rainbow Dash confused of why the cowgirl was looking at her like that.
Wiz: Yet there are few more deadly than the Regenerating Degenerate. Really, Deadpool finally accomplished his dream of becoming the next great superhero.
"At least that's a good thing he has done." Pinkie nodded.
"Just hope he doesn't get overwhelmed with the fame." Flash said.
Deadpool: Aw, that's sweet of you guys! Wanna see me naked?
"What?" Everyone shocked.
Wiz: Wait, what? No, no, no-!
Everyone shocked and gasp of horror upon seeing Deadpool naked even Pinkie Pie didn't want to see that as they try to look away, and Rarity fainted again, this time on Applejack.
Boomstick: Agh, my eyes! Can't... claw them out... fast enough...!
"We can never unseen what we just saw." Twilight and Spike said in union.
Deadpool: Aaand now you're scarred for life. Let's see my competition.
"You're going to wish I can kill you right now!" Sunset threatened.
"Like you can, ever." Deadpool said, appearing upside-down and turns to Flash.
"Hey Flash, have fun banging your future harem." Deadpool winked before vanishing again.
Deathstroke
Wiz: In the history of the DC universe, there has never existed a more lethal tactician and soldier than Slade Joseph Wilson.
"Oh, he has the same last name as Wade." Fluttershy noticed.
"Maybe the one of them was base from the other." Flash guessed.
Background
Real Name: Slade Joseph Wilson
Height: 6'4"/1.93 m
Weight: 225 lbs/102 kg
Alternate Alias: The Terminator
Known for terrorizing a certain group of teenage superheroes (That frightens the Rainbooms a bit)
Will shoot children in the knee point blank using a shotgun (Everyone gasp)
Has yet to be accurately portrayed outside of his comics
Wiz: After illegally joining the U.S. military at the age of 16, he fought in Korea for years where his skill earned the attention of an experimental serum program and the lovely Captain Adeline Kane.
"This is sounding familiar." Applejack said.
Boomstick: This is sounding suspiciously like the origin story of Captain America.
"Oh, that." Applejack realized.
Wiz: Slade actually gets the girl.
Boomstick: Oh, never mind! But does he steal cars?
Wiz: Probably. Slade completely mastered every fighting style under Adeline's tutelage in record time. Apparently, this impressed her so much, they were married with a kid on the way in mere months.
"Wow, now that's a way to impress a woman." Lyra commented.
"I know, wonder if we'll ever meet a guy like that?" Sweetie Drop asked.
"I'm sure whatever guy you'll meet, he'll love you both the same." Flash believed making the two blush a little.
Boomstick: Now that's my kind of woman! Oh, you're a badass? No roses! No dates! Let's fight people, get married, and plow!
"Way to make it sound uncivilized, Boomstick." Rarity said.
Boomstick: Feeling pretty fucking great about life, Slade volunteered for an experiment that would help him resist enemy truth serums. Everything went exactly as planned...
They see Slade going on a rampage with screaming and glass shattering.
"That doesn't look like it went as planned." Sweetie Drop pointed out.
Boomstick: You'd think these guys would've learned by now.
"Like doing other test before the human test subject." Sunset stated.
Wiz: Wouldn't you know it, the injection did not have the effects they were looking for. But instead of ruining his life forever, the experiment accidentally transformed Slade into the deadliest assassin in the world. A Terminator if you will. Which begs the question: What on Earth does the U.S. military think is in truth serums?
"Probably just a form of liquid or something new like a gas form." Twilight theorized.
Boomstick: Slade rose as a new man known to the world as Deathstroke.
When seeing the picture of Deathstroke, they laugh when seeing he has a broke drawn hat and mustache with the word "LOL" next to him.
Wiz and Sweetie Drop: Really?
Deadpool: Don't forget to like, fav, and subscribe! Whoop, whoo-oo, whoop!
Abilities
Enhanced mind: Blazingly fast reaction times. Nine times the normal processing speed
Enhanced body: Superior strength, speed, and durability
Adaptive healing factor
Mastery in boxing, jiujitsu, karate, ninjutsu, and sword fighting
Extensive knowledge of battle tactics
Boomstick: Deathstroke is nearly superhuman. He can hit harder, run faster, react quick, and push himself longer than an Olympic athlete. Plus, he can use 90% of his brain, unlike the average 10%.
Wiz: Come on! If we really only used 10% of our brains, we'd be about as dumb as sheep!
Boomstick: You're a sheep!
"Wiz is right, the human mind does use a little more than 10% of our brain power." Twilight believed.
"Bet you're glad to be smarter than a sheep." Rainbow Dash teased with a laugh, earning a stare from Twilight.
Wiz: What's important here is that Deathstroke's mind can process information nine times more efficiently than an ordinary man. He can think quicker, hear better, and see faster- Goddammit, that's not a real thing!
"Seriously, how hard is it to say his sight just increase better?" Twilight asked.
"Maybe the creators thought it was better to say it like that." Lyra guessed.
Boomstick: Ooh! We should put him and Captain America into a staring contest!
"We're gonna a timer for that one!" Pinkie stated and pulled out a stopwatch from her shirt, between her breasts surprising Flash.
Wiz: He also has a healing factor, which can repair any part of his body... even if his brain is blown to smithereens.
Boomstick: Bringing him back from the dead.
"Guess even the dead can't keep this family man down." Rarity commented.
Wiz: Unfortunately, life back home was rough for Slade. His abilities were put to the test when his son was kidnapped by a group of rival mercenaries. Despite a successful rescue, his son lost the ability to speak.
"I'm sure the kid is still fine." Flash hoped.
Boomstick: So his ungrateful wife lashed out in rage and Slade was never the same.
Wiz: Literally.
"So much for that." Rainbow Dash said.
Boomstick: But he's one step closer to his secret dream of becoming a pirate.
"I don't think pirating is what he would do after that." Rarity stated.
Boomstick: Question, Wizard: If he has a healing factor, how come he's still missing that eye?
"That is a good question." Sunset agreed with Boomstick, for once.
Wiz: Well no one knows, Boomstick, but perhaps not even a healing factor can repair the deepest of emotional wounds.
Boomstick: Oh, that's bullshit!
"There's nothing wrong with feeling emotional of being drafted away form the people you love." Applejack said a little upset as Rarity holds her hand.
Wiz: Despite his new lack of depth perception, Deathstroke remained as skilled as ever.
Weapons & Armor
Dual machine guns
Sniper rifle
Promethium sword
Energy lance: Fires a concussive laser blast
Super Bomb: A very expensive flash grenade designed to keep Superman at bay
Armor: Partially composed of Nth metal. Slightly enhances strength and speed
Boomstick: Partially thanks to his favorite gear. I'm talkin' dual machine guns, a sniper rifle, and a super bomb.
Wiz: Which is actually just a glorified flashbang grenade with trace bits of Kryptonite. Guess who that's for?
"Oh, oh, oh, I know! It's for Superman!" Pinkie answered while raising her hand.
The guy who fought Goku in one of the most biased fanboy videos ever!
Wiz: Shut up, Wade!
Deadpool: Okay, Ben!
Boomstick: This is just getting weird.
"Tell me about it." Twilight and Rarity exclaimed together.
"I wonder who is this Superman guy they mentioned?" Flash asked.
"Maybe he was on one of those Death Battle episodes, but I don't think the guy who sent us the DVDs has that fight." Spike guessed.
"Probably would've been good to watch too." Rainbow Dash said being curious of that fight.
Boomstick: So back to the weapons. Deathstroke prefers his sweet Thundercat-style sword and laser-shooting energy lance. Also, he's got an awesome suit of armor, made up of Kevlar and Nth metal.
Wiz: Oh look! Yet another fictional alloy that's stronger and lighter than titanium! Also, he has armor composed of promethium.
"Sounds like Wiz doesn't like made up metal alloy." Sweetie Drop noticed that tone.
"Seems like it." Twilight agreed.
Boomstick: Well, my shirt is made up of "Boomstick-ium". See? I can make up alloys, too, writers.
Wiz: Actually, Boomstick, promethium is a real thing.
Boomstick and Twilight: Oh, come on!
Wiz: Though in real life, it's a chemical used in atomic batteries to power guided missiles and spacecrafts. But in comic book land, it's not that at all. It can absorb energy, is incredibly strong, and is self-regenerative.
"A healing suit, far out!" Lyra amazed.
Boomstick: Wait, so his suit has a healing factor, too? So, does like his zipper try and close itself when he wants to take a leak? Because that's horrifying. I mean I remember when I got my junk stuck in the toaster-
"Oh! Please, no!" Rarity complained.
Strength & Feats
Downed 38 men in under 2 minutes
Had his brains shot out, came back to life just hours later
Beat most of the Justice League (Everyone is surprise of this)
Decisively defeated Batman in a hand-to-hand fight
Agile enough to elude Superman
Can see at a subatomic level
Able to kick down a reinforced steel door with ease
Wiz: With his impressive skills and arsenal, Deathstroke has defeated dozens of ninjas at once, survived an exploding nuclear submarine, and took down most of the Justice League by himself.
"Oh my, he really is like a Terminator!" Fluttershy shocked.
"I'll admit, I wouldn't survive going against him." Rainbow Dash admitted.
Boomstick: He's also really good at push-ups.
Shows the footage of Deathstroke in his cell room doing some push-ups.
Wiz: Uh... how many push-ups can he do?
Boomstick: All of them.
"Damn!" Flash, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack shocked.
Wiz: Despite multiple members of the Justice League agreeing he's the best tactician on the planet, Deathstroke is known for violent outbursts of rage when in extreme pain. Depending on who he's fighting, this can make him even more dangerous.
"As if we didn't have anything else to worry about him." Sunset said.
Boomstick: Deathstroke doesn't just solve problems. He terminates them.
Deathstroke: I am the thing that keeps you up at night. The evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest... and neither will you.
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!
Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!
"I'm gonna have to go with Deathstroke, no way that goofball can win against that." Sweetie Drop decided on who will win.
"I don't know, I think Deadpool got this in the bag." Lyra said, going for Deadpool.
Lyra and Sweetie Drop glare at each other like the time they competed for the spot in the Friendship Games with sparks flying between them.
The scene starts at the set of traffic lights along with vehicles coming in different directions, the camera then cuts to the bus stop with the poster of Deathstroke with a $5,000,010 bounty, then pans next to the bounty poster of Deadpool's with a $5,000,000 bounty.
"Haha! Deadpool is ten bucks worthless!" Rainbow Dash laughed.
Deadpool: PFFT! What a rip! Seriously, what makes this chump worth 10 bucks more than me? C'mon! I'm me! What!? Am I right?
The two mercenaries are observing the poster of the latter, and not realizing they're close to each other as Deathstroke doesn't respond.
"That's an odd way to meet." Flash commented.
Deadpool: Yeah, I am. I'm pretty sure.
Deadpool and Deathstroke realize they are next to each other and somersault backwards.
"Now they notice each other." Applejack rolled her eyes.
Deathstroke: It's your lucky day. (pulls out his machine guns) I can show you.
Deadpool: Oh, boy! A show? (pulls out his machine guns) Can I get popcorn first? I hope they have salt and pepper shakers. I love them to be tasty.
"Me too!" Pinkie agreed.
Deadpool: FIGHT!
"Go Deadpool!" Lyra cheered.
"Send that clown to Hell, Deathstroke!" Sweetie Drop yelled.
Both combatants shoot at each other, with their Machine Guns deflecting each one of their bullets.
Deadpool: BANG! BANG! BANG! B-B-B-BANG!
In slow motion at Deadpool's side comes five bullets, and came another from Deathstroke's side, bouncing off in opposite sides, then it switches to normal speed, where they keep on firing until both combatants run out of ammo.
"Very shocking to see they can aim perfectly like that." Sunset surprised.
Deadpool: Uh-Oh!
Deathstroke pulls out two ammo clips from his armor to reload, only to realize that Deadpool has disappeared, wondering where he has gone to. Deadpool teleports behind him.
Deadpool: BAMF!
Just as Deathstroke turns around, Deadpool kicks him and beats Deathstroke while continuously teleporting, and Deathstroke drops his machine guns as well.
Deadpool: BAMF! Shoryuken! BAMF!
"Hey, that was Ryu's move!" Rainbow Dash pointed out.
"Guess he must be a Street Fighter fan." Spike shrugged.
Deadpool: You better believe I am!
Deadpool teleports into the air in slowmo, poised to kick.
Deadpool: Check out this rad air!
Deathstroke gets kicked in the stomach, and lands on the ground, pulling out his energy lance. Deadpool lands on the ground.
Deadpool: A Donatello fan, huh? (takes out his twin katanas) I was always more of a Leonardo guy myself. Although, I think most people would pin me more as a Michelangelo, you know that's them labeling—
Deathstroke hits him with his staff, interrupting him.
"Thank you, Slade for shutting him up." Rarity said crossing her arms under her chest.
Deadpool: I will not be labelled!
The combatants continue fighting with the swords against the energy laser lance
Deadpool: No touchy-feely!
They fight until Deadpool is knocked far back by Deathstroke's Bo staff but recovers his landing. Deathstroke goes after Deadpool. Deadpool teleports again, close to his opponent and blocks a strike from Deathstroke.
Deadpool: Let's do this!
Deadpool continues fighting Deathstroke seems to be even, but Deathstroke gains the advantage, and he continually hits and beats up Deadpool by twirling his staff around fast.
Deadpool: (yelps) OW! OW! OH, MY KIDNEY!
"Oh yeah, show no mercy!" Sweetie Drop smirked.
Deadpool escapes and teleports into the air.
Deadpool: Comin' at ya!
Deadpool attacks him in midair, but Deathstroke breaks his katanas with his staff. Deadpool teleports away to the side of a road, realizing his swords are broken, but Deathstroke chases him again.
"Now he's disarmed. How will he continue the fight?" Twilight wondered.
"I'm sure he'll do something crazy to drag the fight elsewhere." Pinkie said.
Deadpool: Let's see what kind of mark this leaves on you.
Deathstroke shoots a laser out of his lance, piercing through Deadpool's stomach and knocking him onto the road, and he gets hit by a incoming truck. While on the truck windshield, his wounds begin to heal.
Deadpool: ACK! Hey buddy! Don't let me slow you down!
"I hope that guy doesn't hurt mix up in this." Applejack concerned.
"Something tells me it's already too late." Rarity exclaimed.
"But that won't stop Deadpool from taking that guy down!" Lyra stated in a deep tone.
Deadpool teleports on top of the truck to search for Deathstroke.
Deadpool: Where is that son of a gun? I'm gonna show him what for, I swear- OOoooh, SHIT!
Deadpool is shot straight through the head by Deathstroke who is revealed to have his sniper rifle on top of a bus, and he reloads. Deadpool lands on windshield again.
"That guy doesn't give up the hunt that easily." Sunset said.
"Deadpool have met the windshield yet again." Flash joked a little.
Deadpool: *talking to the truck driver again* Look at me, LOOK AT ME! Do not slow down!
"Not like he can do that anyway." Spike pointed out the fight is now on a bridge.
Deadpool teleports on top of truck again. Deathstroke shoots and misses Deadpool while he keeps teleporting closer, even moving to the other side of the bridge at one point.
Deadpool: MISSED ME! Whoop! Whoop! Whoop! Whoop!
"Going for the confusion strategy, at least he knows more than he leads on." Sweetie Drop said.
"Well, he was a mercenary before becoming Deadpool." Flash pointed out.
Deadpool: I! HATE! YOUR!
Then Deadpool teleports behind Deathstroke trying to spook him.
Deadpool: DUMBFACE!
Deathstroke finally punches Deadpool in the stomach.
Deadpool: OH, MY KIDNEY!
Deadpool is repeatedly punched and kicked until he goes down, Deathstroke then pulls out his sword.
Deadpool: Oh, is it swordfight time? Good thing I carry spares!
"Of course, he would have more." Twilight groaned, remembering the Magic Satchel.
Deadpool and Deathstroke continue fighting with swords again, with Deadpool parrying Deathstroke.
Deadpool: Guess it's cutting time!
Deadpool continuously slashes Deathstroke, but his armor and healing factor leave him unscathed. Deathstroke gains the upper hand, shoots Deadpool in the face several times with his pistol and breaks Deadpool's spare katanas after the Merc with a Mouth backflip trying to block his attack.
If you spent half as much time concentrating as you do talking, perhaps you would be less predictable.
"Oh, burn!" Pinkie said.
Deadpool: Not helping, Pinkie!
Deadpool: OH YOU'RE KIDDING ME! I'M PREDICTABLE!?
"With you acting like an idiot, then yes." Sunset answered.
Deadpool: Fuck you, Sunset.
Deadpool reaches and pulls out a boombox, playing his Marvel vs Capcom 3 theme once again. Deadpool somehow changes his clothes in a split second from his signature red and black jumpsuit to sweats with chains and a DEADPOOL headband.
Deadpool: I'm just getting warmed up!
As he starts dancing around, a special effect surrounds him making it more flashy and people are cheering from the foreground, causing Deathstroke to groan.
"Where did all those people come from?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"The Fourth Wall, remember?" Pinkie reminded her friend.
Deadpool still breakdances while dodging all of Deathstroke's attacks and hitting him with break dance moves.
Deadpool: *sings* Splick splick, Dynamite! (moonwalks) He's coming for me, Watch the fight!
"Yeah! Shake what your momma gave ya!" Pinkie cheered as she dances, and Lyra joins her.
"That won't save him for long." Sweetie Drop said.
As Deadpool keeps on dancing, an annoyed Deathstroke shoots the bus' tires with his pistol, causing it to skid and cause hundreds of car crashes. Both combatants stagger. Deadpool teleports just as a car fly towards both him and Deathstroke while Deathstroke dodges it. Vans and cars kept crashing. Deadpool, who now is back in his old clothes and had dual pistols, and Deathstroke both leap off two different vehicles towards each other.
"And they say traffic jam makes you feel dead." Flash commented.
The truck tips over while the combatants fight in mid-air and then land on the side of the school bus, still in midair. They continue to fight, evenly matched, until Deadpool holds a gun to Deathstroke's head, which ends in Deathstroke wildly slashing Deadpool.
Deadpool: OW! OW! OW! MY OTHER LUNG! OW! OW! OW!
Deadpool gets impaled through the chest.
Deadpool: MY SPLEEN!
Deadpool then gets shot in the back of the head and sent flying.
Deadpool: MY LEG!
Deadpool ends up landing on a flying car.
Deadpool: OH! IT'S CRAMPING!
"Dude, he didn't even go for your leg!" Rainbow Dash pointed out.
"Yeah, pay more attention to yourself." Sweetie Drop added.
Deathstroke cuts the car in half causing an explosion. He then realizes his sword is missing after the explosion. Deadpool teleports behind Deathstroke and stabs him with his own sword.
"Done in by his own weapon!" Pinkie winced a little.
Deadpool: Pop-Pop, watching Deathstroke-
A truck is seen about to collide with Deadpool.
Deadpool: Ah, damn it! OH MY THIRD LUNG!
The truck explodes, and extreme effects like Michael Bay's film with explosions. An unconscious Deathstoke is seen, as is Deadpool, who is unfazed by the damage, and he gets up revealing that he's missing an arm and holding a limp.
Deadpool: Well, that escalated quickly. Yeah, you might want to lay low for a couple of days, cause... you are, pretty much responsible for a mass murder.
"You caused that murder too!" Applejack pointed out.
Deadpool puts his limb back on while Deathstroke, who is missing his mask, lets out a groan while regaining consciousness with a sword in his chest.
Deadpool: *laughs* It's a Deathstroke kabob!
While he was pointing at Deathstroke mockingly, he just realized that he putted in his leg on the upper arm and his arm attached to the thigh by mistake.
Deadpool: Whoops! Hang on, give me a sec. Oh this is going to hurt!
"That was pretty funny that he got the leg for an arm." Fluttershy giggled.
Deadpool attaches his limbs in the correct places while Deathstroke pulls his sword out of his chest, then struggles to get up while groaning in pain.
"It's not over, Deathstroke is still in this!" Rarity hoped he can put Deadpool down for good.
Deadpool: Whoa, hold on! You heal fast too? I got something special for that!
"I think I know what that is." Sunset said.
As Deathstroke finally gets on his feet, Deadpool pulls out his last sword.
Deadpool: Carbonadium Sword! Murdering all your pesky Wolverines and Saberteeth since 2012! Good year for cinema.
The combatants fight once more, once again evenly matched. While their swords are locked Deadpool points his pistol against his arm and right at Deathstroke's face and turns to the audience.
Deadpool: All the children in the audience, cover your eyes!
"Why?" Fluttershy asked.
Deadpool fires, the bullet going through his arm and hitting Deathstroke's good eye. Deathstroke staggers while covering his wounded eye that was formed by the gun's bullet.
"Oh, that's why." Fluttershy frightened of seeing a man's good eye got shot.
Deadpool teleports behind Deathstroke and cuts him, and Deathstroke falls as the screen blacks out.
"No, he can't have lost to him!" Sweetie Drop hoped that isn't the case.
Deathstroke is seen lifting up his head seemly alive.
Deathstroke: (deep voice) And the moral of the story is...
Deadpool reveals himself puppeteering Deathstroke's head.
Deadpool: (normal voice) *gasps* Deadpool wins! YAY!
"NO!" Sweetie Drop dropped on her knees in despair.
"YES!" Lyra shouted throwing her fists in the air of victory.
Explosions are heard, while Deadpool throws the head away and sings Macarena while replacing two lines.
Deadpool (replacing lines): This is totally racist. HEYYY CHIMICHANGAAAAAAA! (Chomping Noise)
KO!
While Deadpool is driving a sweet ride, on that hood, it has Deathstroke's dismembered head as a hood ornament.
Deadpool: (faking) Oh! Oh, YouTube comments. Oh, I see you rolling. Oh, you're hating. Oh, it wounds me so- it doesn't at all. Explain how I beat this asshole.
Wiz: Don't tell me how to do my job.
"Yeah, let him tell us how the heck did Deadpool win!" Rainbow Dash demanded.
"Relax, you'll see how awesome I am." Deadpool said suddenly appeared next to her.
Wiz: This was a surprisingly even match. Though Deathstroke was the superior fighter of the two and had the better armor, Deadpool could take all his punishment and give just as much.
"I survived some pretty tough situations like my run-in with the Hulk, Thanos, and Galactus." Deadpool listed.
"And you were already a skilled fighter to begin with." Lyra mentioned.
"That too." Deadpool nodded.
Boomstick: Deathstroke's smart, so normally he would have no problem predicting his opponent's moves, but Deadpool is so unpredictable, not even Taskmaster, or sometimes even himself for that matter, can keep up with whatever he's doing.
"Damn, you're almost as unpredictable as Pinkie or more!" Sunset shocked.
"You could say we're two peas in a pot." Deadpool smirked.
"Indeed, we are!" Pinkie agreed and they high-five together.
Wiz: Unfortunately for Deathstroke, he didn't have the means to put Deadpool down for good. And while Deathstroke's healing factor was perfect for repairing damage, Deadpool's trumped his by being capable of replacing entire organs at a much faster rate.
"Faster than the raging sex time Sunset and Flash were doing at the start of this chapter." Deadpool blurted out.
"WHAT?!" All the girls and Spike gasped as the couple blushes of embarrassment.
Wiz: Sometimes the original isn't always the best.
Boomstick: Deadpool is just a cut above the rest.
"Oh, better go!" Deadpool excited exit the scene.
Wiz: Wiz: The winner is-
Deadpool pops in victoriously to finish the last sentence.
Deadpool: Spider-Man! I mean Deadpool, shit!
"I have to say, that was amazing to watch a Death Battle and I think we found ourselves a new show to love." Lyra smiled.
"I know, it was so much fun!" Sweetie Drop said hugging her girlfriend and the two squeal together.
"Do you mind if we watch one more episode with you?" Sweetie Drop asked.
"Sure, it's more fun to have more people watch this together." Flash nodded.