The Odd One
by theOwtcast
First published
Made a friend? Check. Gotten permission to move in with the ponies? Check. Lived happily ever after? Well, uh...
Now that Spike has convinced Princess Cadance that the ponies had been wrong to assume Thorax was an enemy, the kind changeling was given, and accepted, the opportunity to make the Crystal Empire his new home, one where he hoped to soon have many friends, plenty of love to sustain him, and basically a good life, much better than the one he’d escaped from. He really should have known it wasn’t going to be that easy.
Set between Walk Where There Is No Path and Winds of Change. The story will touch on some of the events from Path, but familiarity with said story isn’t an absolute requirement.
New Home
If anyone had ever told me that a changeling might be accepted into pony society as a friend and an equal, I would have thought they’d meant a changeling disguised as a pony. But an undisguised changeling welcomed by ponies, and at that, by none other than the very alicorn princess whose wedding had nearly been ruined by the invading swarm and the Queen who had imprisoned her and stolen her husband-to-be? And that the said alicorn’s sister-in-law would be the first pony to offer a hoof of friendship to a changeling in his true form? Such a thing was unheard of; if anyone had ever told me it would happen, I would have laughed in their face!
But that laughter would have been a mere façade intended to conceal my true feelings, ones I knew would have gotten me in trouble if I revealed them too openly… ones that had in the past gotten me in trouble more times than I cared to count because I’d dared to reveal them too openly. Outwardly, I would have laughed and ridiculed the aforementioned situation; inwardly, I would have been jealous of that changeling who had somehow, miraculously, managed to befriend ponies and have himself accepted among them! I would have longed to find out how that lucky changeling had done it, I would have done everything I could to seek him out and get him to reveal the secret of his approach to me so I could attempt it too! All my life I’d wanted a friend, and all my life I’d suffered because of it; the rest of my kind had no patience for those who wanted to share love and friendship. In their eyes, those things were merely food to be taken by force from other creatures; no changeling warrior worthy of his carapace would waste time on such folly pursuits!
No changeling but me. But then again, I wasn’t a warrior, not in the least; I was a wimp, an anomaly, a disgrace of my kind and a freak of nature that needed to be wiped from existence, even more so after I’d escaped from the hive, having come to the realization that there was no future for me there, only pain and suffering! I’d had no guarantee that wherever I ended up would treat me any better, but it had been worth a try, so I’d run off regardless of what might happen. Had it been better away from the hive? Hardly, for the most part. There had been occasional bright moments, yes, but mostly I’d just experienced different flavors of misery… so much that, by the end, I’d nearly given up hope of finding what I’d been looking for so desperately!
So if anyone had told me that I was going to be that changeling who would befriend two alicorn princesses of Equestria and their dragon assistant, and that one of them would grant me permission to take up residence in her own land and become her subject, I wouldn’t have believed them! It would have been a dream come true, but I wouldn’t have thought it possible to achieve such an ambitious friendship despite my best hopes!
But that was how things had turned out, and once the paperwork was completed - whatever that meant - I would officially become a citizen of the Crystal Empire, and free to do whatever ponies were allowed to do and befriend as many of them as I wanted to befriend.
A dream come true at last! I couldn’t wait to make it official!
Of course, things weren’t quite so simple. Princess Cadance may have accepted me as a friendly soul and her subject, but Prince Shining Armor still had his misgivings about me, despite Spike’s and mine best efforts to convince him otherwise; not only was it his duty as Captain of the Royal Guard to take claims of a member of a hostile species with a grain of caution, but he had every right to suspect my motives after what my now-former Queen had done to him on his wedding day! I wanted to convince him about my good intentions, but admittedly, getting him to instantly believe my every word would have been too good to be true.
Oh well, I would just have to prove myself to him, then. Hopefully it wouldn’t turn out to be impossible! His willingness to trust his wife’s decisions about me had been a good sign, though, so maybe it wouldn’t take the rest of my life to get there!
And in the meantime, I hoped the friendships with Princess Cadance and Sunburst would balance out his animosity and suspicion. Spike, Starlight, and Princess Twilight weren’t going to stay here forever, but they had already assured me that they wouldn’t forget about me, either, and had promised to write regularly.
“‘Write regularly?’ What does that mean?” I asked Spike once we were out of the ponies’ earshot upon being given permission to leave the throne room.
“It means they’ll send letters to you,” he replied cheerfully.
“Oh.” I pondered this. “How does that work?”
“You don’t have letters in the hive?”
“There are written military reports, but I’m guessing this is different.”
“Okay… say you want to tell your friend who lives in another town about something. You take a piece of paper or parchment and write your thing, and when you’re done, you put the paper in an envelope, write your friend’s address on the envelope so the mailpony would know where to deliver the letter, stick a stamp on it, and throw it in a mailbox or take it to the post office.”
“Are there any restrictions on what I’m allowed to write, or how long the letter is allowed to be?”
“No, you write whatever you want, in as many or as few words as you need. And it isn’t supposed to be all stuck-up and formal like I’m guessing a military report or other kinds of official correspondence would be. You just write in your own words, the same like you’re doing now talking to me!”
“Just like that? Wouldn’t the mailponies disapprove of casual language or misunderstand things from time to time?”
He stared at me blankly.
“Wha- oh no, the mailponies don’t read your letters, silly!” he chuckled. “That would be a breach of privacy! They just deliver them!”
“Wow... So I can write anything I want without being randomly called to explain myself?”
“As long as whoever you’re writing to knows or can figure out what it’s about, yeah!”
This was amazing! I suddenly wanted to write a letter to Pharynx and tell him that I’d found a friendly place to live and was doing fine… but how would the mailpony deliver my letter to the hive without getting captured in the process? And wouldn’t the other changelings fail to see the importance of privacy, as Spike had called it, and read the letter themselves? And even if it did manage to reach Pharynx untampered with, what promise did I have that he wouldn’t report everything to Chrysalis?
Oh no. If Chrysalis found out where I was…
Reluctantly, I dropped the idea of writing to Pharynx. Just because I’d momentarily imagined him to be worried about me didn’t mean that he really was! In fact, he’d more likely be relieved at no longer having to protect me all the time! Better to leave things be, let him live his own life, and embrace my new life here!
“Why so glum all of a sudden?” Spike nudged me.
“Nothing… just thinking about… things.” I shrugged. “Does the Crystal Empire have a post office?”
“Every city does! The one in Crystal Empire is on the corner of Aquamarine and Amethyst Street.”
“Okay. Uh, where are Aquamarine and Amethyst Streets?” I asked sheepishly. “I’m sorry, I’m such an idiot right now!”
“Why, because you don’t know the city layout? Pffssh! You’re new here, and nopony expects you to know everything right away!”
“But I’ve been here ever since Flurry Heart was born…”
“You’ve been hiding in a cave ever since Flurry Heart was born! That’s like not having been here at all, and that short walk we had earlier today wouldn’t have taught you much about the city, even if I had known that you needed a tour!”
“If you say so…”
“Hey, why don’t I show you around now? You probably won’t learn everything right away, but at least it will give you an idea of where to look for things!”
“Sure!” I pranced excitedly. “Oh, thank you, Spike! Thank you!”
“Don’t mention it,” he winked. “That’s what friends are for!”
By now we’d reached one of the exits to the outside, and I stopped briefly and unleashed a burst of my magic.
Spike raised an eyebrow. “Crystal Hoof?”
“Princess Cadance hasn’t yet announced to the crystal ponies that a changeling will be living among them. I don’t want to cause a mass panic by looking like myself before they know to expect it!”
“Yeah, good idea. I haven’t thought of that!”
He opened the door and we stepped out into the street.
Several hours later, my head was spinning with all the new information from Spike’s tour around the city. So many street names, so many shops and public gathering spots, and so many ponies to meet and befriend everywhere! Spike had been right; I couldn’t hope to remember it all right away! I intended to try anyway; he’d tried so hard to familiarize me with my new home, and I didn’t want to disappoint him by letting that effort go to waste!
Home. How strange it felt to call a place that after such a long time on the run! But a good kind of strange! Would it live up to that word’s meaning and to my hopes and expectations? For the first time in forever, I felt confident that it just might!
Please, if I’m dreaming, don’t wake me…
“Okay, now that we’re back,” Spike spoke to me as we sat down on a couch in one of the castle’s hallways, “what do you think about the city?”
“It’s… big… and has more things of interest that I expected,” I replied. “And it’s beautiful! And there’s so much love everywhere in it, I can’t imagine ever going hungry again!” Then, pulling myself together, I added, “Do you really think the crystal ponies wouldn’t mind me feeding on it?”
“Hey, that’s entirely up to you, but I’m sure they’ll like you! Just, you know, try not to hiss… it’s kind of scary and they’re prone to freaking out for the smallest of reasons.”
Kind of like me. “I’ll make sure to remember that,” I assured him.
“Oh, there you are!” Princess Twilight came around a corner and joined us; my old reflexes kicked in as soon as I saw her, and I sprang from the couch to the shiny floor and bowed deeply. “I was wondering- oh, Thorax, you don’t have to do that! Please get up!”
I did, though half-expecting to find that her wish had been a test of my submissiveness. Would I get blasted now? I closed my eyes and braced myself for whatever was coming.
Nothing happened to me, though, and her aura of love hadn’t turned menacingly dark, so I opened my eyes again. The Princess simply turned to Spike and continued, “Where did you guys disappear to? I couldn’t find you anywhere in the castle!”
“No worries, Twi, I was just showing Thorax the city!”
“Oh. Wait, didn’t you do that earlier today? Before all that… erm, ruckus… in the throne room?”
“Hardly. Between the crystal ponies demanding stories and you teleporting us away, there just wasn’t a chance!”
“You’re right. So, Thorax, how do you like the city?”
“I love it! It’s so much better than anything I’ve ever seen before, I can’t even compare it!”
“Has Spike been a good tour guide?”
“Yes, Your Highness, he’s shown me a great deal!”
She winced slightly.
“You don’t have to call me that, you know! Just Twilight is fine!”
I smiled sheepishly and nodded. “I’ll try, Your Hig- uh, Twilight.”
“So, I was wondering… now that you’re here, would you mind answering a few questions? Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble! I was just thinking, you’re the first changeling I’ve gotten to know, and I’d like to know more about you, both you individually and changelings as a species, and because not much is known about your kind beside what little was observed during the invasion of Canterlot and glimpsed from changelings discovered sporadically and what studying the few deceased changelings available to us was able to reveal, and now that ponies have a non-hostile changeling among them, this is a perfect opportunity to gauge your abilities such as memory and learning-”
“Oh no…” Spike groaned and buried his face in his claws. “Here we go again…”
“-so,” Twilight continued excitedly, oblivious to Spike’s response and my sudden caution about her eagerness, “where is the Crystal Empire Library?”
“Huh?” Had I missed part of the speech?
“Oh come on,” she threw up her hooves, “don’t tell me Spike didn’t show you where the library is!”
“Well, he did, it’s, um…” I thought about it and pointed my hoof in a direction I thought might be correct. “That way? In the Opal Street?”
“Excellent! And the post office?”
“Um… there,” I pointed in a slightly different direction. “Corner of Aquamarine and Amethyst Streets… but why-”
“Crystal Museum?”
“Quartz Street?” I pointed again. “What does this-”
“Twilight…” Spike interjected.
“Sunburst’s house?”
“Granite Street, wha-”
“Twilight!”
“The hospital?”
“Corner of Jade and Ruby-”
“TWIIIIILLLIIIIIIIIIIGHT!”
“Yes, Spike?”
“Give Thorax a break! I know you’re perpetually hungry for test subjects for everything, but come on, he doesn’t have to be one on his first day here! I’m sure you’ll have plenty of time for that later!”
Test subject? That didn’t sound good... I cast a worried glance at Spike.
“Don’t worry about it, bud,” he assured me. “Twi here just likes to know everything about everything and doesn’t know when to stop. She has no foul intentions! She’s just naturally over-curious!”
“Ooookay,” I said.
“Well then, I’ll leave you alone now,” Twilight said. “Just one more thing: have you two made any plans for tomorrow?”
“No, not really,” Spike and I said in near-unison.
“Great! Thanks!” She turned to leave, then glanced back and said, “Oh, and which building is in Peridot-”
Spike crossed his arms and huffed loudly, interrupting her.
“Right. Sorry!”
Spike and I spent some more time on the couch, him telling me more about Twilight and her scholarly pursuits, focusing mostly on her tendency to investigate and experiment and have things backfire in the most glorious ways imaginable. I listened eagerly. If only a fraction of it was true, no wonder that she’d submitted me to an interrogation the first chance she got! And by the sound of it, I’d gotten off easily!
Some time into the storytelling, Spike let out a yawn.
“Sorry!” he apologized. “I must be more tired than I realized!”
“Well, it has been quite a day!”
Just then, Princess Cadance arrived. I bowed again.
“Hello, Thorax, and do get up,” she said with a warm smile. “You don’t have to bow all the time, you know. Anyway, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind spending the night in Spike’s room just this once? I’ve assigned you an unoccupied room in the castle, but we haven’t had the time to fully prepare it yet. Do changelings have any special preferences?”
I looked questions at Spike and he nodded.
“Whatever you have is fine, Princess,” I told her.
“And there’s plenty of space for you in my room!” Spike added. “Remember how I’m a celebrity here? That means I get to use the biggest guest room in the castle whenever I come for a visit!”
“Thanks,” I smiled. “To both of you!”
“Well then, I’ll leave you to settle in. Good night!”
“Good night, Princess!”
When she was gone, Spike stifled another yawn.
“Why don’t we turn in for the night?” he suggested.
I agreed and he led me to his room. It was indeed big, much bigger than I’d expected! And every surface looked clean and comfortable, too!
I curled up in an empty corner and closed my eyes.
“Oh no Thorax, you’re not gonna sleep there!” I heard Spike complain and opened my eyes.
“Why? Is this your spot? Sorry, I-”
“No, it’s- why would it- what were you- Why do you want to sleep on the floor?”
“Where else am I supposed to sleep?”
“In the bed, or on the couch, or some other such thing! Don’t you know what a bed is?”
“Yeah, but aren’t beds reserved for royalty and other distinguished individuals?”
He stared at me incredulously.
“Of course not! Everypony sleeps in a bed, or sometimes a couch if a bed is unavailable!” Then, as if a realization hit him, “You’ve never slept in a bed before, have you?”
“No, lowly drones like me would be punished for even daring to think of a possibility of sleeping anywhere other than the floor… unless they’re on a mission that requires sleeping in a bed for the sake of maintaining disguise credibility, I suppose. But in the hive, if anyling has something that resembles a bed, it would be Chrysalis and noling else.” Now that I thought about it, would Pharynx have a bed too if he weren’t tainted by having me for a brother? Or had he been offered one and refused?
“In that case, may I have the honor of presenting to you the first bed you’ll ever sleep in!” He motioned to the large bed in the middle of the room and gave a theatrical bow.
“Oh, Spike, I couldn’t! This is your bed; I couldn’t possibly take it from you!”
“Don’t worry about it, I normally sleep in a basket, and anyway, this bed is too big for me! I can spend one night on the couch!”
“I don’t know, Spike…”
“Thorax.” He fixed a stern glare on me. “Either you’ll get in that bed willingly, or I’ll tie you up and throw you in it!”
“Fine, if you insist…” I got in the bed, still unsure if this was a good idea. “Hey, this is soft!”
“Why else do you think ponies use them?” he chuckled, then grabbed himself a blanket and threw it over the couch. “Well then, now that that’s settled, good night!”
“Good night, Spike!”
“And if I find you on the floor in the morning, you’ll be in for it!”
Heroes
Spike didn’t find me on the floor in the morning. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t planned to humor him for a bit and then move to the floor once he was asleep despite his objections, but the day’s events had worn me out more than I’d realized! Or was it relief that I didn’t have to run and hide anymore? Or both? Yeah, probably both. The comfortable softness of the bed and the warm blankets hadn’t helped any; I’d fallen asleep almost immediately, and had remained soundly asleep until well into the morning hours.
I might have slept longer, had persistent but gentle shaking not aroused me from my dreams.
“Hey Thorax, wake up already, you lazy bedbug!” Spike called, chuckling as he kept prodding me.
“Huh what?” I mumbled, cracking an eye open. “Something happen?”
“Not really, it’s just that everypony else is awake and you missed breakfast.”
That got through. I was instantly on my hooves, eyes wide in panic.
“Eggshells!” I blurted out. “I’m getting punished, aren’t I? How bad will it hurt?”
“Whoa, relax, you’re fine! No one’s gonna punish you! Why would they? Skipping breakfast isn’t a crime!”
“...and oversleeping?”
He sighed and shook his head.
“Ponies aren’t barbarians, Thorax. Why would they go around punishing people for the smallest things?”
I avoided eye contact. How was I supposed to tell him that my whole life had been like that?
He caught on.
“It’s what the hive does, isn’t it?”
I nodded.
“I don’t know whether I’m more interested to hear it or afraid to ask.”
“I’d rather forget that place altogether!”
“That bad, huh? Anyway,” he continued, “Twilight asked me to find you. There are a few ponies here that she’d like you to meet, if you’re interested.”
“Are they friendly?” Please say yes!
“As friendly as they come! You’ll like them, I promise!”
“I’d love to meet some new friends! Lead the way!”
He took me through a couple of hallways and down a stairwell to the part of the castle bustling with activity. The crystal ponies and Royal Guards eyed me curiously as we walked on, keeping their distance, a few of them whispering something to one another, but none of them assaulted me or ran away screaming. I took it as a sign that the Prince and Princess had informed them of me. Whether that was the case for the whole empire or just the castle staff, there was no way to know immediately, but I trusted that they would take the necessary steps if they hadn’t already.
Spike then approached one of the doors and opened it, ushering me inside. I assumed this was a dining hall: a large table dominated the center of the room, and a dozen chairs were placed around it. Flowers and sculptures adorned every nook and corner, and there was a tray with a stack of cups and a funny-looking pot on the table, and seven separate cups placed around, one in front of each pony sitting at the table.
Twilight and Starlight I already knew. Well, that wasn’t completely true; I’d been introduced to the two and had interacted with them, but I knew the other five too well, by sight at least if not by names. Seeing them here made me freeze in place; my smile vanished, my eyes widened again, and my eager anticipation gave way to dread and panic.
With the exception of Starlight, the ponies before me were the same ones I’d watched and rooted for in Canterlot as they fought Chrysalis’ army, the same ponies who had reignited my desire for friendship and ultimately inspired me to persist in seeking it against all odds!
But I was a changeling, and they had fought changelings at least once. It was safe to assume that they didn’t hold my kind in high regard, to say the least. Would they set that hostility aside and give me a chance to show them my real self? Would they believe me? Could they even bring themselves to try?
If only I’d remembered to disguise myself! It might have helped break the ice, or at the very least, it might have curbed my panic until I deemed them ready to see my true form!
But it was too late now; the opening door had interrupted their conversation, and now they were all staring at me as tense silence filled the room.
I cast a frantic glance at Spike, and he gave me a reassuring nod and a pat on the shoulder.
“Everypony, this is Thorax!” Princess Twilight finally announced after what seemed like forever, but was more likely a mere second or two.
The yellow pegasus had already cowered in her chair; the white unicorn looked undecided between screaming and fainting, and the pink earth pony stared at me with exaggerated, almost comical suspicion. The blue pegasus and the orange earth pony looked like they were just waiting for the signal to pounce me.
“Whoa nelly, Twi, Ah thought ya were just spouting a lot of hooey,” said the orange one, “but ya really brought one of them changelings here!”
“Yeah, what’s up with that?” the pink one joined in. “It sounded like a perfect prank, and I get that you’re not much of a prankster, but what do I know, maybe you found a reeeeeeeaaaaaly good book about pranks and decided to try some of them on us, but COME ON!”
“Enough with the talking!” the blue one interjected and flew up from her chair. “I say we kick his rump before he gets any ideas!”
I braced myself to run.
“Rainbow!” Twilight caught her in her magic before she could tackle me and placed her back in the chair, then looked around the table. “I wasn’t lying to you, I’m not pranking you, and I’m not conspiring with the enemy! Please don’t make me repeat the whole speech I just gave you!”
“You made a valid point in that speech, darling,” the white unicorn had recovered enough to voice her opinion, “but you do remember all the dreadful things these ruffians did in Canterlot, don’t you? You simply can’t be suggesting that we should… forgive them?!”
“You forgave me,” Starlight muttered. “Why not him?”
“Ooh! Ooo-ooh!” The pink mare suddenly waved a foreleg and sprang onto the table. “Girls! What if Twilight is a changeling? Maybe she wasn’t pranksterific earlier - maybe the changelings are planning another invasion and stole Twilight and sent the fake Twilight to convince us to befriend an undisguised changeling and make us think they aren’t evil anymore so we’d give him valuable intel and then when we’re careless, BAM! They attack again and eat us! Everypony for herself!” She dashed off and hid inside a flowerpot, her eyes somehow poking from underneath the roots of the plant that had already occupied the said flowerpot.
The yellow pegasus closed her eyes, let out a whimper and started shivering.
I looked at Spike, wondering how this had gone so bad so quickly when he’d insisted that it wouldn't. He opened his mouth to say something, but the orange mare beat him to it.
“Pinkie’s right, y’all,” she said. “Twi, Ah hate to do this, but how’d our first slumber party go?”
“The one with just you and Rarity, or the one where we were all present?”
“Me an’ Rarity was first, so that.”
“It was a disaster because you two couldn’t stop arguing, but a tree saved the day by falling into my bedroom and forcing you to reconcile. Or saved the night… what’s the proper expression?”
“And what was the name of the chicken that got petrified?” the yellow pegasus finally spoke.
“Elizabeak.”
“Remember that time when I ended up in Ponyville Hospital?” Rainbow asked. “What was the reason?”
“You had an accident while attempting a flying stunt and broke your right wing.”
“Hmmmmm. You’re close enough,” Pinkie said, emerging from the flowerpot, “but explain this!” She made a series of quick gestures that I couldn’t even begin to guess the meaning of!
“You zipped your mouth, locked it with a key, dug a hole, threw the key into the hole, filled the hole, built a house, and slid the house on top of the hole.”
“And when did you first see me do that?”
“Years ago, when I was having second thoughts about keeping Rarity and Fluttershy’s secret confessions from one another.”
“Okay, you’re clear!” Pinkie grinned widely as she declared the conclusion that the others must have already reached.
But I wasn’t off the hook yet. She approached me with that exaggerated suspicious glare and looked me over, rubbing her chin. Then, without warning, she peered into my eyes, opened my mouth and peered inside, stretched out my tongue to its full length, examined it, released it abruptly so it nearly hit me in the eyes, stooped down to poke at my leg holes, then sat on my back and wiggled my wings and neck fin - all of which took less than two seconds. Maybe three if I’d counted wrong.
“Okie-dokie-lokie!” she said cheerfully. “Congratulations, you’re friendly!”
“Um…” I started, puzzled by how she’d reached that conclusion, only to be interrupted by her loud gasp, after which she dashed out of the room faster than eyes could follow.
“What just happened?” I asked nopony in particular.
“Heh, it’s Pinkie,” Spike said. “We’ve learned to just roll with it!”
“So, a friendly changeling, huh?” Rainbow flew closer to me. “Did something happen to you or were you always like that?”
“I was always like this.”
“I didn’t think it was possible,” the yellow pegasus spoke again; she had stopped shivering at some point and decided there was no need to be afraid of me after all. “Are there any more like you?”
“Friendly? No, I’m the only one as far as I-”
Pinkie’s speedy return interrupted my reply. She zoomed back into the room, nearly knocking me over, and she hadn’t come empty-hooved: she carried a large plate of cakes in her mouth and another in her hoof, and balanced one on her head, one on her tail, and two on her back. I watched in awe as she deposited each plate onto the table with stunning speed, somehow managing to keep every plate and their contents intact. I would have definitely dropped half the cakes and broken the plates even at normal speed, maybe even if I’d shapeshifted some extra appendages onto myself! How did she do it?
The last plate had barely made contact with the table when she ran off at breakneck speed again, only this time, she was gone a mere second, and returned with-
“Gah!” I squeaked at the sight of a cannon that she was pushing into the room, and as-good-as-teleported under the table, shivering again and regretting every decision I’d ever made in life, especially the one about agreeing to meet these ponies. What had I been thinking? I should have demanded to know whom to expect! And Spike should have known better than to put me at the mercy of cannon-wielding ponies without warning! He had to have known what Pinkie would do! He had known, hadn’t he?
My instinct screamed at me to put on a disguise, but what kind of disguise would help me in this situation? A cannonball would injure or kill me even if I turned into a rock or something similar, and I couldn’t outrun or outfly these ponies, not if I had to dodge cannonballs! Not to mention that a disguise wouldn’t fool them into thinking I wasn’t a changeling at this point!
“Pinkie!” I heard Spike shout at her. “How ‘bout a warning next time?”
“But then it wouldn’t be a surprise- oh.” Her reply registered in my mind but was quickly drowned out by the frantic attempts to think of a way to get out of this mess.
Then, Spike peered under the table with a concerned expression on his face, and the yellow pegasus crawled under and gently stroked my hoof.
“It’s okay,” she whispered. “You’re not in danger. That isn’t a real cannon; it shoots confetti and streamers. Pinkie uses it for parties and only for parties. I’m sorry we forgot to explain it to you in advance!”
Her voice alone, soothing and warm, would have calmed and reassured me pretty quick, but the pure love she radiated was even more powerful! It wasn’t as strong as that of Princess Cadance - I didn’t think I’d find love stronger than hers if I searched for a million years - but it was powerful nevertheless, and I knew as sure as I’d ever known anything that I could trust this mare with my life!
“A fake cannon?” I mused. “That exists?”
“Yes. I don’t know how many there are in the world, but Pinkie would never fire a real cannon. She just wanted you to have fun, I promise!”
I tilted my head to take a closer look at the cannon. Pinkie leaned in and offered a hoof.
“I’m so so soooooo super-duper sorry for scaring you with my party cannon! I guess I’m so used to everypony liking it that I never thought about what it might look like to you! Can I make it up with extra hugs? Please please please pleeeease let me make it up to you! And I’ll get you twice as many presents for your next birthday party than you normally get! When is your birthday, by the way?”
“I’m not sure… changelings don’t celebrate birthdays.” She gasped again. “Or anything, for that matter.”
“Aww, now we have to throw you a party every day to make up for what you’ve missed! But don’t worry, Auntie Pinkie Pie is on the job and will not disappoint you!”
“I appreciate the gesture, but let’s not overdo it. One party is fine,” I said, getting out from under the table at last. “And thank you for snapping me out of it,” I said to the yellow mare. “Um, I don’t think I caught your name, sorry.”
“No problem! I’m Fluttershy, pleased to meet you! Oh, and these are Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Rarity. And Twilight and Starlight, but you’ve met them already.”
“And I’m honored to meet all of you,” I said with a slight bow. “You’re kind of my personal heroes, if I may say so!”
“Whatever do you mean, darling?” Rarity asked. “Not that we aren’t flattered, that is!”
“I saw you defend the other ponies in Canterlot during the invasion. Your unity is what-”
“Wait, you were there?!” Rainbow got in my face. “I thought you said you’ve always been friendly! And now you’re telling us that we fought you?!”
“Not me personally! I was just hovering around, avoiding conflict!”
“Why were you even there if you didn’t want to fight?”
“Because I wasn’t given a choice! No changeling ever gets to choose what they want to do! We have to obey orders or risk punishment! And I took a huge risk by escaping the hive - Chrysalis will kill me if she ever finds me!”
That calmed her down a little, but unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for myself. I was shivering in terror again at the thought!
“So why’d ya take the risk, then?” Applejack asked.
“Because it was still a lesser evil than what I was going through in the hive on a regular basis,” I sighed. “Please don’t ask for details…”
“There, there, Thorax,” Fluttershy stroked my back. “It’s all in the past, and you’re safe here. If anything happens, you have us to rely on! Right, girls?”
They all agreed readily. Did that count as friendship, even if we’d only just met? It sure felt like it did, especially with all the love coming from them right about now!
Oh, how wonderful it was to have friends!
“Why don’t we sit down?” Starlight invited. “These cakes look delicious!”
“Sure thing!” Spike was the first to accept. “I’m famished!”
The rest of them returned to their seats. I hesitated. Was I expected to sit with them? Would I be allowed to?
“Aren’t you gonna join us?” Spike asked me.
“But… I don’t eat cakes… or any pony food…”
“So what? You can still talk to us!”
“Yes! I can’t wait to hear about how your trip to the Crystal Empire was and where you’ve been and who you’ve met and how many super-duper friends you’ve made!” Pinkie squeaked, then deflated. “Wait, you haven’t made any friends at all, have you? Twi said you were starving when Spike found you and you wouldn’t have been starving if you’d made friends! And I didn’t even hug you like I promised I would!”
She somersaulted off her seat and over the table, landed next to me, and wrapped me in a squeeze that seriously threatened to crumble my carapace.
I gasped for breath. This was a hug? I felt like my eyes were about to pop out of their sockets and fly out the window!
She finally let go. “Better?”
“Yeah… thanks…” For releasing me. I’d have to check myself for injuries later if my body didn’t stop hurting after a while. On second thought, I’d have to check for injuries regardless of when my body stopped hurting.
“Okie-dokie-lokie!” She returned to her seat, this time trotting at a normal pace.
I decided to take a seat too. I had been invited, after all - at least Spike had made it sound like that - and I sure needed a seat after that hug!
“That’s better,” Rarity said and levitated the strange pot I’d seen earlier. “Care for some tea, darling?”
So that was what it was. Should I? It wouldn’t have any nutritional value for me, but I decided I might as well, for the sake of fitting in if for no other reason.
“Sure, I guess,” I said.
She filled a cup and levitated it to me. “Careful, it’s hot!” she warned.
I took the cup in my hooves and attempted to take a sip. A slight problem presented itself: I’d forgotten about the shape and hardness of the cup and hadn’t taken my fangs into account. I pondered briefly whether to shapeshift them away, maybe even turn into a pony while drinking, but decided to postpone the matter, and put the cup down without actually drinking anything. If anypony found it weird, they weren’t showing it, or maybe they decided not to force the matter. Or had they simply assumed that I found the tea to be too hot for drinking right away?
“So, Thorax,” Starlight spoke, “how do you like Equestria?”
“It’s better than the hive, and from what I’ve seen of it, you ponies are living the dream. Though I can’t say that I haven’t gotten in trouble…”
“How so?” Twilight.
“Well, some of it was simply the consequence of being revealed as a changeling, such as in Canterlot and Manehattan-”
“Whoa, hold on just an apple-picking minute,” Applejack raised a hoof. “Ya said ya were in Canterlot before, and Ah know how it ended for y’all, so why upset the apple cart and go there again?”
“The… apple cart?”
“It’s an expression,” Spike told me.
“Oh. Well, I snuck onto a train and didn’t realize where it was going until I got there… otherwise I would have avoided the place at all cost!”
“Fair enough,” Starlight admitted. “But getting your cover blown wasn’t the only issue, I take it?”
“No, there were a few other incidents. For example, I got arrested on my first day in Equestria because some guy called Braeburn or something like that thought I was an apple thief-”
“Braeburn?!” Applejack got on her hooves. “He’s mah cousin, dang nabbit!”
“Really?”
“Darn tootin’ he is! He said somethin’ about an apple thief a while ago, now that Ah think about it! That was you?!”
“I wasn’t stealing anything, I swear! I just tried to hide in a tree and he saw me!”
“Ah suppose ya wouldn’t have much of a reason to steal apples,” she mused. “But why didn’t ya tell ‘em?”
“Tell them what, that he’s a changeling?” Rainbow interjected. “As if that would have made things any better!”
“Yes,” I said. “I don’t suppose you can help me explain it to him somehow, sort out the mess I made? I wanted to apologize, I just couldn’t think of a way to do it without sending myself to the dungeons for the rest of my life!”
“Ah’ll see what Ah can do,” she promised.
“I bet that would have never happened in Ponyville,” Pinkie muttered.
“Well, the problem I had in Ponyville was of a different nature…”
“Goodness!” Fluttershy gasped. “What happened? You didn’t get hurt or anything, did you?”
“I was disguised as a bird and ran into you… Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with you; I couldn’t! Your love is so pure and sincere and… actually, that kind of was the problem, but not in the way you think…”
“I don’t follow.”
“Right. You thought I was a bird and nuzzled me, and love came off from you in droves, and it did wonders for my hunger, but then I freaked out because I was feeding on you without your consent and I’d vowed I’d never do that under any condition! So I broke off from you and fled, and you were visibly sad because of it, and I wanted to go back and comfort you, but couldn’t! Please forgive me if you can!”
“Oh, of course I forgive you! Why wouldn’t I? By the way, you didn’t have to leave so quickly! I’m sure I would have understood even then!”
“I don’t know, Fluttershy,” Twilight said. “You might have gotten past your fear and understood, but the rest of us probably wouldn’t have listened! Even I needed some convincing yesterday when Spike brought him along, and I’m the Princess of Friendship! I should have been the first to befriend him, not wait for Spike to practically give up his status of a hero for Thorax’s sake!”
“That status wouldn’t have been worth the ash from last year’s fire if I’d neglected to help someone in need,” he said.
“We understand your point, but it shouldn’t have come to that,” Starlight said. “It only goes to show that caution can’t justify prejudice! Who knows how many other potential friendships and alliances haven’t been forged because somepony couldn’t look past their preconceptions and see the good in others!”
“For what it’s worth, I’m glad you did at least in my case!” I said.
“Aww, grouphug!” Pinkie called out.
Everyone got right to it and snatched me up to partake in the hug before I knew what was happening, and it was one of the best moments I’d ever had!
Confession
The party went on past lunchtime and well into the afternoon. A crystal pony who I assumed was one of the servants dropped by a few times with trays of fresh food for the ponies and even some gems for Spike, and Pinkie produced a few games and a photo camera from somewhere. I got to know the girls a little better; they turned out to be everything I’d imagined them to be and so much more, and apparently they liked me too, just like Spike had promised! Though none of them had verbalized their willingness to allow me to feed on them, they had shared plenty of love with me through hugs and games and singing, and, for the first time in my life, I was completely sated!
I had said it before, but looking at my new friends, I couldn’t stress it enough: this was a dream come true!
If only other changelings could see it that way…
Unfortunately, that was too much to hope for. Though a sporadic individual drone might be willing to consider the benefits of sharing love over stealing it, I doubted that there would be more than a hoofful of them, and they wouldn’t be likely to dare to attempt it lest they suffer the backlash of the rest of the hive. No doubt would the punishment promised to me for doing what I’d done serve as an additional discouragement to any drones who might otherwise be willing to try a different approach to feeding!
Could I have sought out any such changelings while still in the hive and gotten them to escape with me? No, I realized. I’d spent plenty of time trying to make friends there; had there been any willing to try friendship, I would have found them, or they would have heard about me and sought me out! But what if someling had wanted friends but hadn’t dared to admit it? There had to be some way to reach out to them! Had I tried hard enough?
And what about Chrysalis? I knew that hoping for forgiveness from her was futile, but what if I could prove the strength of shared love to her? Would she realize her mistake if she knew that the love of friendship could feed the whole hive many times over? Would she reconsider her stance, for the hive’s sake if not for my own?
Probably not. I’d had more than my fair share of contact with her when receiving punishment for whatever I’d done wrong at some point. I still remembered the bloodthirsty glint in her eyes and her sneer of pleasure and deranged laughter whenever I’d cry out in pain, the sight of venom she would drool unaware and let drip into pools of my blood on the floor, her satisfied chitter as Pharynx or whichever other nearby drone would drag my broken, half-unconscious body away… The wounds had healed, the pain had stopped, but the memories of how she’d enjoyed watching me suffer… they weren’t going to fade so easily!
No, I reminded myself, I could never expect Chrysalis to accept the way of sharing love, even if every single drone in the world did! She would sooner annihilate the entirety of our kind than accept friendship!
I took some comfort in knowing that her days of torturing me were over; I was safe here, surrounded by friends and protected by the Princess of Love. If there was still hope for me to fully heal and recover from my old life, it would happen here! But what if Chrysalis found me one day? Would Cadance and Shining Armor’s power be enough to shield me from her? Would my friends be able to save me? Would I have made a difference to anypony or anyling by then?
“Why the long face, sugarcube?” Applejack’s voice brought me back to reality.
“Yeah, don’t be such a party-pooper!” Pinkie joined in. “C’mon, let’s turn that frown upside-down!”
“Thanks, Pinkie, I appreciate your effort, I really do! It’s just…”
“Yes?”
I sighed. “Seeing all this-” I gestured to the cakes and balloons, and the flowers, and the crystal ponies out in the streets, “-I couldn’t help but think how wonderful ponies’ lives are, and how I wish I could have had even a tiny fraction of it… before…”
“No problemo! We just have to party extra hard to make it up for what you’ve missed!”
“Hey, why don’t you come visit us in Ponyville sometime?” Spike interjected.
“I’d like that too,” Starlight told him, “but would it be safe? I don’t want to force Thorax to be in disguise for the entire duration of his visit, but I can’t promise that Ponyville would welcome a friendly changeling even with all of us vouching for him!”
“Then we’ll have to make them understand!” Rainbow exclaimed. “Who’s up for the challenge?”
“Ooh! Me! Me! Mememememememe!” Pinke accepted, waving her hooves around. “Count me in! Let’s find Thorax some friends!”
“An’ a mighty challenge that’ll be,” Applejack shrugged, then smiled. “Boy, we’ll have our work cut out for us! An’ burst mah pumpkins if Ah can’t handle hard work!”
“Why, of course, dear!” Rarity agreed. “We’ll make sure that you get the most fabulous welcome that you’ll never forget!”
“I hope you don’t mind staying here in the meantime?” Fluttershy asked. “I’d hate to make you think we don’t want you there!”
“Oh, don’t worry,” I reassured her. “I’ll need some time to get used to being around ponies anyway!”
“Of course, that doesn’t mean you can’t visit Ponyville in disguise at any time if you feel like it!” Spike added.
“Then it’s settled,” Twilight said. “Thorax, we’ll do everything we can to make Ponyville a safe haven for you!”
Tears of joy seeping from my eyes spoke more than words ever could, and so did my excited leaping… good thing that Starlight had been quick with her magic to grab a sculpture I’d accidentally collided with and tipped over! It would have broken for sure!
Soon it was time for them to return to Ponyville. Twilight went to say goodbye to the Prince and Princess and their filly, and Starlight caught Sunburst with a few parting words on the way out of the castle.
I was about to say goodbye too when Spike came up with an idea.
“Want to escort us to the train station?” he asked.
“Sure… if it’s okay with everypony else.”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
“I don’t want to intrude-”
“Nonsense! You’re our friend! And haven’t we just promised to you that you’ll always be welcome among us?”
I couldn’t deny that.
“Oh, and Cadance has informed her subjects about you,” Twilight added. “You can go out in public undisguised and nothing will happen to you!”
“And if somepony does give you trouble, you don’t have to put up with it!” Spike said. “Cadance and Shining Armor will protect you!”
“I’m not so sure about Shining Armor,” I said. “He still doesn’t seem to trust me.”
“Okay, it might take him a little to warm up to you, but I’m sure he’ll get there. But you can trust Cadance!”
“And Sunburst!” Starlight added.
“And if nothing else works, come to us and we’ll sort it out!” Rainbow offered.
“I’ll try to not let it come to that,” I said, “but thanks!”
“WAIT!” Pinkie exclaimed. “We didn’t even take a group photo!”
The others agreed and gathered up in front of the heart-shaped relic under the castle, putting me in the middle to pose with them. Twilight went to get Cadance and Shining Armor, and though the prince had apparently and unsurprisingly excused himself from the ordeal, the Princesses were back with Sunburst and little Flurry in tow. Pinkie halted a random crystal pony passing by to snap the photo so no one from our group would have to be excluded from it. Cadance and Sunburst then said goodbye to the girls again and took Flurry back inside, and I escorted the ponies and Spike to the train station. It was located on the outskirts of the city, but the walk there turned out to be shorter than I’d expected. Had I simply lost track of time in the company of my friends? It was such a pleasure to be around them!
I’d taken Twilight’s advice and gone into the streets in my own form. As she’d claimed, nopony caused a scene because of a changeling among them, which was a relief as much as it was strange to be undisguised in public without getting chased or having things thrown at me. But, as I’d expected, it was still a long way from being welcome: some ponies flinched at the sight of me, some openly stared, some mumbled to themselves or whispered to whoever stood near them… pretty much the same responses to my presence this morning in the castle. Obviously the ponies didn’t like me, they didn’t want me here, they might have even wondered why I’d been allowed to stay, but at least they seemed to trust the Princess enough to keep their objections to themselves. Were they simply afraid of punishment? No, I scolded myself, this wasn’t the hive; Princess Cadance wouldn’t exact the kind of punishment I was painfully familiar with, the kind of punishment to be truly feared! She would go for something much milder if she couldn’t think of another option!
Shining Armor, though…
He would be stricter than his wife - a military leader such as himself would have to be - and I had no doubt that his disciplinary methods would be felt, at varying degrees depending on the severity of the transgression maybe, but somehow I still found it hard to imagine that he would reach Chrysalis’ levels of delivering pain. Maybe, if he were really furious, he would get to what might be considered a mild punishment by hive standards…
Either way, I didn’t want to find out.
But we were almost at the train station by now, and my attention was returning to my friends. They were still talking cheerfully, and none of them was showing signs of having noticed that I’d gone silent. Maybe they assumed that I preferred to say little? I’d noticed that Fluttershy rarely spoke, and even when she did, she avoided raising her voice even when the others would fail to notice her. Was I getting the same treatment? Not that I had a problem with it; it was way better than getting mocked or beaten up, and anyway, I didn’t feel the need to be the center of attention like Pinkie or Rainbow! Not that there was anything wrong with being the center of attention, if that was what they liked.
“Oh! Almost forgot!” Spike exclaimed when we stepped onto the platform. “I didn’t give you our addresses!”
“Addresses?”
“You know, the thing you write on the envelope of a letter?”
“Right, sorry! I’m just… overwhelmed, I guess… with all the new things I saw in these couple of days… I’m not normally this stupid… well, I hope I’m not…”
“Hey, it’s alright! It’s a lot to take in all at once! You’ll get the hang of it!” He took a pencil and a piece of parchment from his backpack and started writing.
I waited patiently for him to finish. Behind him, Twilight and Starlight were discussing something, Fluttershy way playing with a small sheep that had wandered onto the platform, and Applejack stood there and watched, then turned to me and snickered.
“...and there, finished!” Spike offered the parchment to me, attempting to stifle a chuckle of his own.
“Thanks,” I said accepting the parchment and wondering what was so funny, when movement in the corner of my eye caught my attention. “Um, what are you doing?”
Rarity flinched and withdrew a yellowish ribbon - no, what was it called? Measuring tape?
Rainbow burst into laughter.
“My sincere condolences, Thorax,” she said, not really trying to compose herself. “You’re about to be cursed with a fifty-seven-hours-long fitting session!”
“...what?”
“You can’t rush perfection, Rainbow!” Rarity protested. “Don’t listen to her, Thorax, dear, I think you’ll look positively dashing in a tuxedo!”
I tilted my head. Why would I need a tuxedo? What was a tuxedo, anyway?
“An’ whaddya think he’ll pay ya with?” Applejack joined in. “Ah reckon he ain’t got no money!”
Ya reckon right, Applejack, I thought.
“Pfft! It would be a gift!” Rarity pouted.
“Ooh, just like the dresses you made for our first Gala,” Fluttershy said. “I’m sure whatever you make for Thorax will be just as lovely!”
Dresses? Oh, right! Rarity had mentioned her dressmaking business!
“So, a tuxedo is a clothing item, right?” I asked. “You don’t have to do that, Rarity! I couldn’t ask that of you! I appreciate the gesture, but really, it’s too much!”
“Oh, don’t be ridiculous,” she smiled. “You make it sound like a dreadful chore, but making new designs is what I live for! Though, I’ve never made an outfit for a changeling before - not counting Chrysalis’ wedding dress, of course, but she was disguised at the time and I thought I was making it for Cadance - so it might take a teeniest tiniest bit longer than usual because I’ll have to adjust the pattern… I do hope that won’t be a problem?”
“I’m not going to talk you out of it, am I?”
“Of course you won’t! My mind is made up!”
I sighed. “I don’t want to be a burden, but if you insist…”
“It’s settled then! I’m going to make you something and I just know you’re going to love it!”
The train arrived, and the ponies and Spike got on board. They waved me goodbye, I waved back, and when they were out of sight, I flew back to the castle. I didn’t want to take the streets yet. Someday, hopefully soon, I would, but I wasn’t yet comfortable with facing the ponies undisguised on my own. A disguise would have helped, but I’d already decided to resort to it as little as possible now that I was allowed to be here.
I landed at the base of the castle and went inside. Shining Armor was waiting in the hallway at the top of the stairs, fully armored up.
“I was wondering when you’d come back,” he said sternly. “Ready to talk now?”
Talk? I was momentarily confused, but then I remembered that he’d expressed the intention to discuss something with me immediately after Princess Cadance had accepted me as her subject.
“Yes,” I said. “What about?”
“Come,” he commanded, ignoring my question.
He led me down a series of hallways to a part of the castle I hadn’t been in before. No servants were here, only a few Royal Guards patrolling about, and a pair of them guarding one of the doors. Shining approached the said door, opened it, and motioned me to get in.
I did. He followed and closed the door behind us.
There were shelves and cabinets along the walls of the room, except where the window was. The shelves were filled with books and scrolls, but I noticed a few other objects here and there as well, such as old helmets and spearheads. A crest shaped like Shining’s cutie mark decorated the far wall, and a few spears and halberds were positioned at each side of it. A desk stood in the middle of the room, with quills, a stack of parchment, a small flag, and a statuette of what I took to be a distinguished military figure on top of it. One big chair was behind the desk, and two smaller ones were on the side.
This had to be Shining Armor’s headquarters! Office? Base of operations? What was the correct term?
“Sit,” he barked, placing one of the smaller chairs directly across the table from the big one, then marched around and sat in the said big chair.
I obeyed cautiously. What was he going to do now? Issue orders, presumably, but would that be all? Would he question me about my intentions too? It made sense that he would! Would he be satisfied with my answers?
Uh-oh. Was he planning to force answers out of me? I intended to give him the full truth either way, but would he believe me? Had I underestimated him before? Would he press on with everything he had until he forced me to tell whatever he wanted to hear, no matter how false in reality, because I would be in so much pain by then that I wouldn’t care what I said as long as saying it would allow me to catch a break?
Suddenly I realized that I half expected chains to sprout from my chair and grip me firmly in place, subdued at the Captain’s mercy to do to me whatever he wanted; but nothing happened. It still could, though! And I had no doubt that his repertoire of spells was well up to the task of dealing with whatever he believed I might do!
He stared at me in an uncomfortable silence. I cowered a little. Bit my lip. Let out a whimper. Looked at him pleadingly while trying not to look at him at all, lest I look at him the wrong way. Shivered.
“So,” he finally spoke, the tone of his voice about as warm as my brother’s had been when he learned I’d been expelled from military training. “‘Thorax’, right? You stated that as your name?”
“Yes,” I replied. How I had managed to utter a coherent sound at that moment, I would never know!
“What is your business here?”
“I came here looking for friendship-”
“You said that already! Why are you really here?”
“It’s the truth! I have no foul intentions if that’s what you’re thinking!”
“Suppose you are telling the truth, why the Crystal Empire? Why not somewhere else?”
“Because this is where I ended up… I have been attempting to make friends throughout Equestria, but something always happened that forced me to leave the town I was in and try my luck in the next one!”
“And I’m supposed to believe that you couldn’t find a single friend in the whole vast kingdom of Equestria and then just happened to stumble upon one in the out-of-the-way place governed by the very couple whose wedding your armies disrupted not that long ago?”
I didn’t know what to tell him. As unlikely as it sounded, that was the whole truth, but how would I get him to believe it?
“What’s Chrysalis planning this time?” He rose onto his hooves and got in my face. I flinched.
“I don’t know!” I squeaked.
“But she is planning something!”
“She…” I braced myself for whatever was coming. “She might be…”
“Spill it!”
“I don’t know any details! I just overheard a group of changelings discuss her orders to regroup and prepare for a new mission! But it was vague, and I got the impression that even the leader of that group didn’t know what this new mission was!”
“Where was this? In the hive?”
“No, in a cave in the wastelands north of Manehattan and some other big city…”
“When?”
“I don’t know! It was some time before I came here, but how long, I couldn’t tell for sure! But I don’t think you’ll find them there anymore… they mentioned something about going elsewhere to rendezvous with other soldiers - I forgot where exactly - and that might not have even been the final destination-”
“Is there anything useful you know about that?”
“Um… nothing I can think of right now…”
He subjected me to another glare that could melt rocks.
“Please believe me…” I whispered, unsure that it wouldn’t only make things worse for me.
“Fine,” he snorted after a moment. “What do you know about the incidents in Canterlot and Manehattan?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re saying that you don’t know that a changeling was revealed and chased in Canterlot a little less than a year ago and that a whole network of infiltrators was exposed and cleaned up in Manehattan?”
“Well, that changeling in Canterlot was me-”
“Lies! He was captured and is refusing to talk! What were his orders?”
So Rascal was still alive, apparently. I was somewhat relieved for not having sent him to his death - though that could still happen, especially if Chrysalis’ soldiers got to him - but also glad that it hadn’t been me.
“You misunderstood. I was revealed in Canterlot, I was chased through the city, and I fell down the cliff, but Rascal was one of the changelings sent to kill me or to drag me to the hive to get punished for leaving, and the only reason why I survived the subsequent encounter with him is because I managed to bite him and my venom rendered him unconscious. I was even hiding in a nearby bush when the Royal Guards collected him.”
“Then how do you explain his injuries?”
“Timberwolf attack the day before. I was there too, and I’m pretty sure the rest of Rascal’s team got eaten.”
“But you survived,” he sneered. “Lucky you.”
“I got thrown into a ravine and managed to escape with only minor injuries.”
“Hm. It could have happened, I’ll give you that much, even if it does sound unlikely,” he shrugged. “What about Manehattan?”
“The infiltrators? I know there are a lot of them throughout the world, not just Equestria, but I can’t give you any names or locations. I’ve never had a clearance level high enough to know such things.”
“But you do know that infiltrators exist.”
“The whole hive knows. It’s not a secret that we do it, but not everyling knows the specific details. I assume it’s similar with your Royal Guard: an average pony would know that they exist, but not which guard is stationed where and under what orders, maybe not even if the said average pony is a relative of a Royal Guard member. It does work like that, doesn’t it?”
“And why would I tell you?”
“No reason at all!” I squeaked again. “Forget I asked!”
He frowned.
“Okay, so you were in Canterlot and on the East Neighagaran Plateau, possibly near Starlight’s old village. Where else?”
I proceeded to recount the events from my journey and the places I’d visited: buffalo territory, Braeburn’s town, which I knew now was called Appleloosa, the Everfree Forest, Ponyville, Manehattan. Shining interrupted me every now and then, requesting details and clarifications, making occasional comments, and writing things down on a piece of parchment. His distrust of me was still obvious, but, much to my relief, he never resorted to inflicting pain, and hardly even raised his voice for a long while. If I didn’t know what I would have to tell him soon, I’d probably think I was winning him over - not quite there completely, but probably on the right path!
But I had yet to confess to a horrible act I’d committed, which was bound to undo all the progress I might have made in my favor in his eyes, and there was no escaping it.
“You don’t know the name of that place?” he asked when I got to the relevant part of my tale.
“I’m afraid not,” I said. “I wish I did, though…”
He raised an eyebrow. I took a deep breath. Here goes…
“I didn’t stay there long enough to find out.” I sighed and hung my head. “I have a confession to make, and you’re going to hate me.”
“As if I don’t hate you already?”
Fair enough. “I was so hungry by then that I didn’t know what I was doing… A mare was walking in the street, and I… I…”
“You what?” he asked impatiently.
“I lost control… I attacked her and fed on her… I didn’t want to, but-”
He wasn’t listening anymore. He blasted me off the chair, and before I knew it, he was on top of me, horn at the ready to deliver the worst of Tartarus on me, and the look in his scowling eyes was not far behind.
“You fed on an innocent pony?” he roared.
“I wish I hadn’t - I stopped myself as soon as I realized what I was doing - got out of there - wanted to punish myself-”
I might as well have told him that I’d killed Chrysalis; he didn’t seem to care. He blasted me again, and this time it was as painful as the worst of Chrysalis’ torture spells! I cried out, knowing fully well that I deserved it and so much worse, and he kept the spell going for what seemed like forever, for as long as there was breath in me to keep screaming.
I’d expected to faint from that blast, if not die, but it had barely stunned me. It had, however, left me gasping for breath while Shining, still standing over me, opened a drawer and took shackles from it. He wasted no time in chaining me up, then he levitated me, wrapped a loop of the chains around my wings, and stormed out of the room with me in his magical grip while I was still trying to recover from the painful ordeal.
He marched through the castle hallways and then through the streets, not caring about the gasps and stares that the puny changeling in his tow drew from nearby ponies. I looked around dejectedly; how was I supposed to earn their trust after this? Would I ever?
Eventually we arrived at a building on the outer limits of the city. It wasn’t labelled, and the style of architecture matched that of the other buildings here, but the thick bars on every window and the abundance of guards were all I needed to figure out its purpose.
A guard opened the doors as soon as he saw us, and Shining gave him a curt nod and proceeded downstairs. There, he threw me into an empty cell, locked me in, and cast a spell on the bars. A guard approached in the meantime.
“He assaulted and drained a pony,” Shining told him, “admitted to skulking around throughout Equestria, including Canterlot, Ponyville, and Manehattan, and he’s wanted in Appleloosa under charges of apple theft.”
“Understood, Sir!” the guard saluted.
I wanted to say something, to explain myself, to deny those accusations, but it wouldn’t have done me any good. Shining had already left, and the guard didn’t look like he would be willing to hear me out, let alone believe my side of the story.
I tried to touch the bars, wanting to lean on them and let out a defeated sigh even though I knew it would hardly make me feel any better. I tried to touch the bars, but as soon as my hoof got close to them, a magical surge blasted me once again, this time coming from the bars themselves.
I yelped as the surge hit me and launched me into the far wall. I was momentarily stunned, and then I tried to get up from the floor. The world was spinning, and the chains around my legs weren’t making it any easier to stand up.
The guard was laughing.
“Oh, that was good,” he said. “I heard about that spell from the guards who work in prisons that get changelings regularly, but I’ve never seen it myself! And those must be the shackles that fry you if you attempt anything funny, too! They said these two things keeps you pests in check better than anything else they’ve ever tried, and now I can see why!” He motioned with his wing. “C’mon, do it again! Or at least try shapeshifting!”
No thanks, I thought; I’d been blasted plenty enough times today already! I didn’t think that he really expected me to obey, and either way, he got serious again pretty quickly. I wondered again if there was a point in trying to talk to him, but decided against it. And what was I going to say, anyway? That I was innocent? He had to have heard that story from most, if not all, prisoners who had ever had the honor of spending some of their time here! Besides, I wasn’t innocent, and I had no right to claim otherwise!
I just wished that somepony would still be willing to befriend me despite knowing the horrors I’d committed, but didn’t think there was a chance for that anymore.
Crestfallen, I slumped down onto the cold floor of my prison cell.
A Fate Deserved
The hours stretched long with nothing happening. The guard had barely moved except to breathe and blink, no sounds came from the rooms above, and the pony in the cell opposite to mine snored blissfully on his cot. Surprisingly, there weren’t even any rats scurrying about and pestering me. Hadn’t the rumors I’d heard in the hive about pony prisons mentioned hundreds if not thousands of rats infesting every nook and crevice? Not that I minded the rumors being false, even if only in this prison!
I remained sprawled dismally on the floor, barely moving, lost in thought.
How much time had passed since I was brought here? I didn’t know; it was long enough to assume that night had fallen long ago, but beyond that, I couldn’t tell. Did it matter? Probably not. I didn’t have any definite knowledge about the ponies’ judicial system, but I doubted that they would simply let me go after a certain amount of time as if nothing had happened. They were probably keeping me here until they decided on appropriate punishment, whatever that would include. And I had accumulated quite a list of charges for them to have fun with!
Assaulting a pony and feeding on her.
Illegal presence in Equestria.
False pretences.
Disturbing the public order, probably, or however they called it.
Harassment of the Royal Family?
Resisting capture in Canterlot. In Manehattan, too.
Banishment from buffalo territory. Was that even in Equestria?
Stowaway on a train.
Apple theft. How laughable that seemed now, compared to the rest of the list! And I wasn’t even guilty of that one, not really! It had been a misunderstanding!
But even if that misunderstanding did eventually get sorted out and written off, I would still be in a lot of trouble for everything else on that list. Most of it had been acts of self-preservation, but would the ponies in charge of punishing me believe it? Would it help me if they did? It could make things worse; apparently changelings weren’t even allowed to legally exist in Equestria! This was only logical, though; my kind had never brought ponies anything good, only fear and destruction! As unfair as it may sound to make someone illegal in a country just because of which species he or she belonged to, what other choice did the ponies have? I didn’t like that decision, but part of me was, in a way, supportive of it, even if I was about to suffer its consequences; how else were ponies supposed to defend themselves from my kind if not by making every effort to keep us away from themselves?
But what would the punishment for that be?
Simpy sending or escorting us away from their territory wouldn’t do much, as they couldn’t keep us from coming back, therefore, that probably wasn’t done, at least I’d never heard of it having happened. A lifetime in prison seemed like a more likely solution to their problem with us… unless…
Did ponies practice death penalty? Did their law allow for it even if ponies hardly ever resorted to such extreme measures?
Goodness, I hoped not! Chrysalis may have sentenced me to death for betraying the hive, but she was so far away now, and I’d started to believe that she might not find me and exact that punishment by now! If the ponies sentenced me to death too…
I didn’t want to die, not now when I finally had a few friends!
Did I still have friends, actually? Would Spike and the others still want to call me their friend upon finding out what I’d done to that mare? And they would find out, I was sure of it!
Flashbacks of that horrible night flooded my mind again.
Frustration and emotional exhaustion…
Lost in an unknown land…
Hungry… so unbearably hungry…
A moonlit city… a mare strolling in an empty street…
That desperate hunger!
A mare in the street… enjoying the night…
Love… sweet, tasty love…
Control yourself!
Love… hunger…
Hunger screaming, demanding its due!
Mare… love… hunger… so much hunger…
Restraints falling down…
A vow betrayed… a lifetime of integrity, gone!
And the mare’s empty eyes as the black monster drained the love out of her.
The mare’s empty eyes haunted me still, refused to leave me alone after all this time, tormented me insufferably in this cold, dark prison cell that I was barely aware of anymore. All my existence drowned in those neverending purple eyes, shriveled under their severe, empty gaze.
Why did you do this to me? they screamed. Why did you sentence me to a cursed shadow of a life?
I used to be happy! they screamed. I used to love life, you monster, and because of you, I’ll never be happy again!
How will I ever love again, they pleaded, when you robbed me of all the love there was in my heart?
Burning tears filled my eyes and flowed down my face; a lifetime of tears waited yet to be unleashed… and I knew with my whole being that all the tears in the world couldn’t begin to repay my debt, undo the horrors I’d committed!
I’m sorry, I begged the sad, purple eyes to understand. I’m so deeply, unbearably sorry! If I could turn back time, I would… believe me, I would… I would rip my own heart out sooner than allow myself to harm you!
But the eyes burned me still with their unforgiving gaze.
I may have had the strength of character to confess my sins, and I intended to have the same strength to accept whatever punishment was deemed necessary. But I didn’t deserve forgiveness, I knew that too well! I deserved to be in this cell, to remain locked in it forever, to wither and rot away in its cold darkness, safely away from the sight and love of any pony who might become the next victim of my malignant urges that I’d failed to restrain once and might fail to restrain again if something pushed me over the edge like it had in that awful, cursed moment! For the sake of all the ponies around me, I had to be locked away in the most isolated corner of the world, where I could do no possible harm to any creature!
Either that, or to be killed immediately, before I had the chance to even try something I shouldn’t!
I didn’t want to die, but if that was the price I had to pay to keep the ponies safe from my uncontrollable rampaging… so be it.
But even if they decided it was necessary to prevent any further incidents, I knew that nothing in the world could compensate for what I’d done to that mare, let alone undo the damage. There was no pain, no weapon, no torture spell they could unleash on me that would come close to matching the horrors that mare had suffered - and probably still did suffer if she was alive - at the mercy of the darkness that had overtaken my mind!
Death wouldn’t be a punishment. It would be letting me off easy, showing me the mercy I didn’t deserve!
Oh, how I wished, how I desperately wished I could go back in time and stop myself before succumbing to the worst instincts within me! I wouldn’t have died without feeding on the mare’s love, I knew that now: I’d been even hungrier since, while hiding in that cave on the outskirts of the Crystal Empire, and survived nevertheless! And that was one of the worst parts of the whole incident: that I’d violated and destroyed the poor mare when it hadn’t even been necessary for my own survival!
My tears had died down at some point, but now they started pouring out all over again. I let them; for whatever it was worth, they would be a pathetic testament to my immeasurable remorse, even if they couldn’t make it lie any easier on my heart.
The rivers of tears drained me out eventually and the burden of guilt tortured me into exhaustion. I fell asleep right where I was, on the cold, wet floor of my prison cell.