Freedom or Insanity?

"You know I am no longer part of the Alliance Steven...I left that shit behind after you asses side-lined me when that freaken building fell on top of me and I had to get both of my arms and legs replaced with cybernetics and mechanical limbs, so tell me what you want before I under-hand toss your ass out of my home, last time I checked I never granted you access to it." I said dropping onto the sofa and pulling out an old bottle of Earth Style Vodka and took a very most generous swig before shoving back into the folds of the cushions.

Shaking his head in disapproval before tossing a data-pad at my feet, and just giving me a glance before turning his back at me, expecting me to take a look before he says anything else.

Roran Zidane

Age: 26

Ethnicity: Caucasian/ Latino

Home System: Sol. System, Luna Base

Hair Color: Black Eye Color: Cybernetic Replacements (Blood Red)

Height: 5'9'' Weight: 214pounds

Year Born: 2160 April 1st at 12pm

Alliance Military Rank: Lt. Commander (Retired)

Alliance Training: N7 Trained, Alliance Sentinel Training, Alliance Adept Training

Cerberus Connection: Level 4 Clearance

Status: Wanted for Treason.

Subject Delta is highly dangerous when being told what to do, acts very childish when dealing with higher ranking officers, has a deep fondness for cheese, apples, and cheap booze. Grew up at the Luna Base on the Moon, fell into a street gang and rose through the ranks before leaving it all behind for a better life, joined Alliance Military at the age of 17. Has a past criminal record involving Armed Robbery, Extortion, Bribery, Assault with a Deadly Weapon, Assault, Battery, Grand Theft, Petty Theft, Arson and Grand Theft Auto.

Subject Delta was part of the Ascension Project and was under lock-and-key until his training as a Sentinel was complete in basic Biotics and low-level tech training. Delta has also been known to be very loose with rules and will break or bend them to however he see's fit, and when on a mission he is ruthless efficient, but is very rough when dealing with prisoners or hostages, best not used when that situation arises.

Subject Delta was one of the Alliance's best operatives before the battle of the Citadel left him crippled and unfit for duty, was discharged from the army after receiving cybernetic implants to replace the missing limbs of his arms and legs. After leaving the Alliance he later signed up with Cerberus and worked his way into their rankings, later becoming a Lt. First Class, what we do not know on how well he was trained, we do know that he was forced to leave Cerberus on the bounds that his mission began to target civilians and government officials.

Warning: Subject Delta has left the Earth Systems Alliance as of 2163 March 23rd, 10pm, considered highly dangerous even without Alliance-grade weapons or armor, be wary of physical, tech and biotic attacks when engaging.

"Well you caught everything about me but still what does this have to do with me? I quit remember, or did Sanders not even bother with registering my leave through the channels...either way whatever you have to tell me will not change my mind, I said I quit so I quit, get off my back and get the hell out of here..." I said with rage in my voice, I already lost my entire squad in that attack on the Citadel and to the damned Geth. "I swear if this is some sick mind fuck than get the hell out!"

"Zidane this is not about coming back to the alliance, this about what Commander Shepard has started back on Eden Prime with Saren and the Geth. This is about the Reapers."

Raising my only eyebrow, losing the other one to my horrible cooking skills, lets just say that it involved fire and cooking oil. "Reapers you say, pray tell that you don't believe them since only Shepard and the rest of the Normandy believed in that tale...but I also believe in it since there is no way in hell that Sovereign was Geth technology. The weapons on that thing was beyond them, even its armor plating was beyond what the Geth can produce. So tell me Hacket, why are you here."

"Like I said Zidane, the Reapers. I know that Commander Shepard said that they are coming and the Council seems to disagree, but with what we say at the battle of the Citadel we know we will be in the fight of our lives." the Admiral said while his back was still facing me, wanting to let whatever tension build before he says anything else of importance.

"And what does this have to do with me?" I said while pulling back out the old bottle of booze from the sofa, needing another swig since this little talk was taking longer than I had originally intended.

"Soon...everything, but for now I am reinstating you back into the Alliance but on a short leash. Welcome back to the military life son." Hacket said while tossing to my feet my old Alliance dog tags. Oh the memories those have...oh crap...those dog tags.

"Oh fuck me..." I said before downing the last of the vodka before keeling over and passing out onto the floor face first, leaving a nice trail of drool on the tile floor before being dragged out by the two soldiers waiting by the door. Taking me back to the parked shuttle that was waiting at the docking tube before going back to the MSV Shanghai and leaving the Omega System back to the Arcturus System, taking me to my old shit home and lifestyle against my drunken will.

"Got any three's?" Discord said with a bored expression on his face,

"Nope, go fish asshole" I said while shuffling my hand again, trying to hide the fact that I did have a set of three's.

"Now now Roran, remember what I said about using such foul language. Don't make me get the bar of soap again."

"Yea yea yea...bar of soap, and when was the last time you actually used a bar of soap on yourself. You smell like you haven't seen a bath or a shower in years."

"If you keep talking like that to me than I will have to go medieval on your metallic flank."

"My god you stink, even stink would say you stink. Oh god that stench could gag a maggot, oh lordie lord it smells like hot sick and ass and a dead corpse." I said while laughing my ass off while coughing loudly, over all screwing around with the spirit. After a while my laughter stopped and I gazed into the eyes of a very pissed off spirit while the gryphon spirit was also busy laughing his ass off, lightening my mood I decide to do something incredibly stupid. I decided to give Discord a hug, and by hug I mean a bear hug while trying to crush every bone in his spine and chest.

By the time I was bear hugging the bastard, he was busy trying to break free and the sounds of bones cracking and crunching means it is working, but unfortunately my hug was interrupted by something heavy hitting me upside the head, making me break the hug to hold my head in pain which sucks because it felt like someone was stupid enough to hit me with a sledgehammer.

"Now Screwball that was not very nice of you to do to him, sure he was trying to snap me in half like a twig...which almost worked but still, now go apologize to him...hmm...in fact, don't apologize...I have a surprise for him." Discord said while my vision was slightly blurry and everything looked like the time I almost drank that one krogan under the bar table at the cost of one of my kidney's dying, which was totally worth it in the end, watching a krogan nearly passing out drunk would have been great if I didn't get shot in the back of the neck by a batarian pirate thinking that I was his target but instead he shot the wrong man.

Lets just say that I was kicked out of the bar for not apologizing to the owner for making a pretty big mess and not cleaning it up.

After the ringing in my ears cease and the double-vision dies down I can clearly see that Discord is laughing like a hyena while holding his sides, the gryphon king also laughing but is under control, and a small purple pony with frizzy hair and a propeller cap. Right now it feels like the time I tried red sand and was tripping out to the point where I saw the walls melt and I felt like I was 9,000 feet above the floor, holding onto a drawer for dear life. My friends were busy laughing at me when that happened while I was having the biggest trip of my life and it ended with me puking in the toilet for at least 30 minutes. Not fun at all....

"Discord...if I ever get out of here...well along with if you ever get out, than I am buying a round of shots on me...I swear being encased in stone sucks so much ass...I can barely move, haven't eaten in....ages, and I have this urge to beat something to death just to get my pent up anger away...."

"You are so strange Roran, you say you are the last of your kind correct? So if you are the last of your line what are going to do about it? Seeing how you hate all life and just want to keep killing I am sure that the gryphon kingdom could take you in...if you know what I mean."

"Dude...Discord, if you could see anything in my head you should know the man creed, 'If it has a hole, we fuck it!' and trust me, that creed worked...on many occasions....one time above all others...except shit loads of alcohol was involved and I was shitfaced beyond comprehension. I couldn't even talk without fucking up."

During out little mental battle of banter, stupid comebacks, and even dumber remarks we finally agreed to something that even I can say somewhat proudly if I wasn't pissed off that I am the last human alive. I will fuck anything...as long as it is a female that is.

Canterlot Palace, Princess Celestia's Room, Morning

As the sun slowly poked its top over the edge of the horizon the solar princess stood at her balcony and with a glow of her horn and a flick of her magic the moon slowly shifted off the side opposite horizon to make way for the sun her ears perked up and shifted over to the gardens after she thought she had heard somepony say something that they would never say out loud or near her presence.

"Hmmm...sounds like somepony is willing to buck anypony...I wonder who is so bold to proclaim such an act...and at this time of day."

Canterlot Palace, Royal Gardens, Morning

"Hey Discord." I asked while slowly turning my body to Princess Luna who was watching us in her balcony as she slowly lowered the moon.

"What is it this time Roran? I am busy trying to find a way out of this tombstone of mine...that and I am also planning on how to give old shiny butt and dark snooty a surprise that they will ever forget." Discord replied while doing the same thing and slowly twisted in place to be somewhat looking at Luna also.

"Have you had that feeling that you regret what you said and when it happens you regret it even more?" I said while turning and also trying to figure out how I am even turning in place.

"No. Why?" he said while using his powers to make it rain cupcakes and muffins in my head.

"I don't know...I just had this funny feeling that someone heard me and they plan to give me a ride of my life...possibly in both terms...that and it felt like my spine was just dipped in liquid nitrogen...I just hope that it is the two of us that can hear each other." Looking at the falling cupcakes and muffins I tried to grab one but my hand just phases right through it, the snickering of Discord was loud enough for me to give him the middle finger.

"What? Fear that somepony is gonna buck you to the point where your bones turn to jelly and you can't even crawl to escape? That will be priceless to watch!" as he laughed I gave him a kidney shot while laughing at his pain.

"I bet you would enjoy me getting my brains fucked out by something of this planet wouldn't you Discord, and besides...I am hoping their is something better than ponies cause from what I saw I am almost easily twice their size...I just hope their are things larger than them cause if I am stuck here and if worst comes to past...yea I am so fucked."

"And I fucking hate you sometimes friend...sometimes I hate you so much but I can't stay mad at you forever...we have been after all friends for four thousand years, and you are somehow better than me in Poker...how the hell are you even better than me in that game?"

"It is called skill my dear human friend, and also that I cheat when we play just each other, like I said I have an ace up my sleeve." as he said that he pulled out all the aces from the deck of cards out of his lion paw as if it was nothing.

"Fucking cheater I knew something was up when you kept getting all the aces at the worst possible times!"

"Hellooo? I am the spirit of disharmony and chaos, of course I cheat! Playing fair is boring and has to many rules to follow. So I just simply break and bend those rules so I win and get what I want, and besides half the chaotic things I have shown you inside of that melon head of yours is that it is amazing and delicious! Like my maltnado or my candy cane forest, you can't simply hate everything that is chaotic!"

"Yea well watch me hate it...just give it some time cause so far it is pretty fucking sweet. Oh and Discord...can we talk to anything that we see?"

"I suppose we can but why? Are you getting bored of me already?"

"No, I have an idea...and their is a dark blue horned pegasus looking at us from a balcony...wanna pull a prank?"

"Not even gonna ask how we are going prank old Lulu from down here as statues but than again I am bored so...what do we do?"

"Just follow my lead old friend."

Canterlot Palace, Princess Luna's Room, Morning

"TIAAAAAAAAAA!!! The statues are moving again!!!!!"

Canterlot Palace, Royal Gardens, Morning

"Totally worth seeing a princess freak out over statues moving on their own accord, best way to start the day do you not agree Discord?" I said while laughing my ass off, turning to look at the princess was hard, looking at her and contacting her with out thoughts was harder, but simply saying 'We are watching you' was fucking hilarious as hell to see her turn tail and scream like a little girl.

"Oh that was priceless to watch old black snooty scream like a scared filly! If only I wasn't a statue and I would have chased her and make all the paintings and suits of armor turn their heads and eyes to follow her than it would have really made my day!"

Looking around I started to notice that the ponies were setting streamers up, placing tables and sofa cushions everywhere, I saw large tables being placed along with a wooden stage being set up inside of what I can clearly see as the ballroom. Looks like from my current angle and sight is that they are setting up for a party...I bet it was some snobbish noble that loves to get his ass kissed on a regular basis.

"I wish it was just a birthday party but sadly it is something alot more dreadfully boring than a party. It is the Grand Galloping Gala...the worlds biggest and most boring party in existence."

"The fuck is a Grand Galloping Gala?"

Canterlot Palace, Royal Gardens, Late Afternoon

"Oh my fucking god I have never in my long ass life seen so many fucking ponies in one spot...and every single fucking one is wearing a suit, a dress...is that one wearing a bloody top hat and monocle? What the fuck have I stepped into? The fucken twilight realm while higher than a fucking kite?"

"Are you really this surprised to see this many ponies dressed up or are you just trying to ignore the fact that all of them are all dressed fancy and trying to lick the hooves of their leader to fall into their good graces?"

"Does it really matter what I think about these ponies?"

"Nope, I just want to get out of here, ruin the party and quickly leave so I can plan my next reign of chaos. Other than that I can really care less what they wear, I am just hoping to see somepony get drunk from the wine and cider they offer here."

After what felt like two hours I finally had the nerve to ask him a stupid question.

"You wanna play a game of 'Fuck, Marry, Kill'?"

"Eh...not right now...I am busy trying to find a way out of here."

"Eh your loss...like seriously what is the worst that can happen?"

Canterlot Palace, Royal Gardens, Night

"Can you believe it girls! A new species that have lived here in Equestria before ponies! Oh the things they have accomplished and the marvels they could have created! I bet they were a scholar race of intellectuals that were masters of magic! All the things I want to ask this being and all that we can learn from it!" was all I heard from my quiet spot in the garden, the overly loud squeals of joy from somepony talking about me, just keep feeding my ego see where that leads you.

"Ya know sugarcube this new creature for all we know could be nothin more than a brute or maybe even more dangerous than them dragons in the wastelands far to the east. Ya sure this is a good idea to try and talk to this thing?" Oh great...a farmer...and this one already hates me...I swear why does everything hate me? Sure the Reapers hate me since I was meant to be harvested and all but come on, I don't even know this pony and it hates me.

"Oh come now Applejack this is just a statue we are talking about so we can easily handle it, and besides what can a statue do to us? Stare at us to death or to boredom? And besides as long as I am here we can handle anything that is thrown at us!" My lord this pony loves to toot her own horn....hehe...toot their horn.

"I do say Rainbow Dash that you can handle that ruffian back in Ponyville but we are talking about a species that was never before seen by pony eyes since yesterday, so we have no idea what they can do. And besides I just hope they have a thing for fashion as I do, Celestia knows what they possibly wore for royal parties or on a day to day event! Of all the possible materials they used it was probably only the best of silks and gems!" Gems? Who the hell puts gems onto clothing and armor? That is just stupid as hell, gems are hard enough to find as is...except for when they power my suit's armored core, that thing needs to be replaced by a diamond fast or otherwise I will have to ditch the suit behind till I find one the size of my fist. And silks? Please we use synthetic materials...and leather seats on ships was a must.

"I just hope that this new creature is nice..." OH I am nice little shy pony...but if you piss me off I will rip your spine out of your ass and show it to you before you die.

"I hope he likes parties! Everypony likes parties!" God kill me now......I feel a massive disturbance in the force that is sanity and it is coming out of that pony.

I overheard all of this strange conversation from my position as I slowly turned to creep out the ponies that walked by me and to my own enjoyment laugh at those that actually fell over when I started to turn in their general direction. In all it was a night that I did absolutely nothing but scare the crap out of noble ponies and they could do nothing to stop me...until those six ponies from earlier came back.

"So...this is the recently discovered species that Daring Doo found...wow...it surely is....large." said the purple mare with a horn on her head. 'Oh yea, large in more than one way little mare hehehe.'

"Well...it...it looks really....scary." Well little yellow pegasus it seems you are afraid of your own shadow, no wonder you are afraid of me, I bet if I wasn't a statue and was alive right now you would faint.

"Ah bet me and Rainbow Dash here can easily handle this critter easy peezy, it may be large but we can handle anythin' that it might throw at us." Yes you orange pony and the rainbow pegasus can easily handle a full blooded soldier of death with hooves and wings. This will amuse me greatly if I wasn't already amused by my pranks earlier this afternoon.

As soon as they all drew near my stony form I felt something slam into my left side and than I felt a slight dis-connection to my left hand, and when I slightly looked down at the ponies, and turning my eyes even lower to my left hand I saw that it was simply not their anymore.

"Shining! What have you done! You broke the statue! Oh no no no no no....this is not good...this is not good at all! Quick somepony get me some extra-strong sap and a sanding tool to make it look like nothing happened!" Wow this mare was going ballistic, its just a hand I can simply pull out a spare exo-skeletal hand from the lower arm port, its not like I can not just remake a new hand, I bet I can make a heavy iron hand here and be able to pimp slap one of these ponies with it and send them flying.

"You know Twily you can just use that restoration spell that Princess Luna taught you, its just a statue and it can be simply repaired with that spell just put the broken part back where it was attached and cast it, I am sure it will work out alright." Really now....restoration magic? Where the hell was this when my armor was bent all to hell when I needed it?

"Oh...right...hehe....sorry about that but...I think someponies heard the commotion...lets just quickly fix this before they see that it was broken in the first place." Oh thank you Satan for allowing my shitty luck to go unannounced to every snob noble in the building.

Watching the ponies in front of me debate on how to proceed with fixing my broken stone hand and it was amazing to see them squabble over a hand, if they met the woman of my time they would have been at each others necks over a broken nail or a split end...wait that would have been hell on Earth times ten.

After a while they all decided to quickly reattach my hand by magic and hope for the best, and I would have been happy about that if they weren't yelling at each other on how to get it done and by than I saw that Discord's statue now has a small crack on his right kneecap and another on his beard and snaggletooth. Ignoring that his statue also took a possible beating I glared downward to see that the purple unicorn's horn was glowing brightly and I felt my hand go back to its original position and with a loud snap it was back to where it belonged.

'Oh thank you little mare for fixing my hand and putting it back where it belongs. I am sure I can do something to make it up to you...if I was not stuck as a statue that is.' my own thoughts were wondering around a bit as I saw a muffin on a tray being held up by a hoof until that muffin was taken by a pegasus with blonde hair and crossed eyes, and who somehow managed to take the muffin without alerting the waiter. Looking back down I saw that the unicorn was looking right at me and just to fuck with her I choose to slowly turn towards her while all seven of them were looking at me. The looks on their faces was beyond priceless.

"Shining...I thought I heard that statue just thank me...and now I thought we all just saw it slowly turn to face us..."

"I know Twily...I think we need to get Princess Celestia to see it..." Oh thank you Satan and Jesus...I was starting to get bored when worried about my impeding sanity level if I only saw regular ponies, I want to see something fucking exotic now...maybe a dragon if they exist...hell I would do anything just to see another asari again, those girls really know how to blow your mind away.

Five Minutes Later

"What the hell is an asari? You have yet to tell me everything about your past except for the last thing that you bucked nearly left you boneless from the waist down."

"Shut it Discord...and besides that was a bet and I lost with no dignity left, and when I walked out of that room I left with no dignity and without any honor. That krogan really knew how to make me beg...I am just glad that I left alive at all...she was fucking crazy as hell...I rather deal with Jack than deal with her...."

"Your stories rarely affect me but that one right now just disturbs me to the core...you roughly had sex with a wingless dragon, I am just amazed that you left alive is all."

"I swear if you tell anyone about my stories I will destroy you...and just because you are a spirit doesn't mean I can't kill you with fire. And I was just lucky I had any bones left when I was done..."

"So Twilight what was going on with this statue? You said that it was alive and it talked to you let alone that it turned to your general direction?"

'Uhh...no shit their winged unicorn, just because I am a statue doesn't mean that I am simply an empty husk, I would have been if Discord didn't tell me any knock knock jokes or told me about the funny ass pranks he did over the years.'

"I heard everything you just said statue...and your tone is something that is yet to be desired, and that you have dealt with Discord for years without cracking is something to be desired....so what do we call you?"

'Wait what? You can actually hear me? Oh Happy days someone finally can speak to me! You have no idea how boring it is being able only to talk to Discord, the gryphon king, that statue of yourself who never talked back....I think that was just a statue but anyways who do I have the pleasure of talking...or well...mentally talking to.'

"I am not boring you, you are boring me!"

"I am Princess Celestia, Regent of the Sun and Co-Ruler of Equestria."

'I am Roran Zidane, Human scientific name Homo-Sapien, N7 Operative, Paladin Sentinel and death-dealer on the battlefield. An avid lover of fine cheese and wine, devoter to books and wine, and lastly worlds greatest party animal when it comes to the right party.' As soon as I said devoter of books the purple unicorn's eyes were beaming, and I could have sworn that another attendant of the party looked in my general direction when I said that I loved fine wine, and I felt something creep up the back of my neck as a pink pony started hopping in place and sometimes defied gravity for a few seconds before landing. I honestly wanted to know on how to do that.

"A pleasure to meet you Mr. Zidane but I was hoping to speak to you but it seems circumstances have proved that wrong, as you can see many of my ponies wished to speak and study you and your people but it seems the place that we found you is dangerous."

'Ah yes...I saw all of that, you found me in an old London street along with the bones of my fallen soldiers and the remains of the Reaper forces...and I also saw those guards go against a damaged Banshee that I crippled before I got turned to stone. But to get studied by ponies? I am not even sure if I even want to get studied...come back to me when I am not statue, until then no.' At that point when I said no I thought I heard a few gasps that somehow resembled me basically slapping her in the face. At that point I just want to slap the person responsible for breaking my hand.

"I see....well..that can be arranged."

'Ah ha ha ha ha ha no....wait what? You can make me a flesh and blood again? Oh thank fucking god finally I can be free from this god damned shit hole and be able to breath again ...wait what is the catch?' I know that somethings are to good to be true, I just hope I don't have to bed any of these ponies otherwise I am pulling out my Talon and blowing both heads off.

"The catch is that once you are free you are officially a citizen of Equestria, and you have to answer any and all questions all of us have, and afterwards you will have to be studied by our top researchers and scientists to make sure you are safe to be around without us having to worry that you will get us sick. So what say you Mr. Zidane."

'This shit is too good to be true...I know there is something else you are not telling me...but having my freedom means I can finally stretch after nearly I think ten billion years....fine...I accept...but on one condition that I will call upon once I am free....and get a five second head start.' I am going to enjoy this.

"Alright...but this condition I guess you will tell me in private I hope."

'Yea yea...just make with the strange magic...being a statue is worse than you think it is...you have no idea how many times I saw two ponies make love out here...and trust me...I rather not be on this pedestal anymore than I really want to...' Trust me when I say this but when it was just me and Discord here talking two guards walked by on patrol and they both stood around waiting for something until Discord started to laugh his ass off and when I finally asked why he was laughing like a crazy bastard he told me to look down and low and behold those two guards were going at it like rabbits in season. They left a mess to which I haunted them my slightly letting out a ghost like moan and turned to look at them and they ran off as if Discord was after the pair, would have been funny as hell if he did.

With the silence came the slow humming sound as Celestia's horn started to glow, and with that hum was also my own as I started to hum the old world Russian National Anthem and I could have sworn that a few of the ponies were liking that song but all good things must come to an end but I kept on humming as I felt my stony exterior started to crumble and crack as I began to feel things again. The feeling of synthetic leather on my chest, the rough hardened carbon helmet exterior holding my head in place, hell even the feeling of rocks on my robotic arms was a strange feeling until I finally felt free enough to have a little bit of a show with these ponies.

"Yes....yes...YES! FINALLY! I AM FREE! FUCK THE POLICE I AM FREE!" and with that shout I drew both of my arms together as I used my biotics to create a supernova in my arms and as I released it I sent all the fragments of my stone skin everywhere along with a few ponies being knocked down and even one actually got some air time as he went flying off to the the right. After everything died down I felt the spear tips of a dozen pissed of guards bearing down on me to which I only smirked at their hostility. "You know...I saw all twelve of you fighting that Banshee in the cavern...I was not impressed that you managed to kill one that I left crippled but than again you are using spears and swords so I should be at least moderately amused, to which I am...but for now I have pressing matters to attend to." Looking around I saw that they wouldn't let me move without forcing them away so I did what I thought was best at the time, phase out of existence and reappear next to the princess and the others and helped all of them up, but when I saw Shining Armor I only grinned.

"You broke my hand. Pony you broke my hand and tried to glue it back on...do you know what is going to happen next?" He shook his head no. "Good cause this is gonna hurt you alot more than it is going to hurt me."

I took my omni-shield and pimp slapped him with it.

"Okay I am good now...lets get the study over with so I can go visit the graves of my people and die with them.