I was taking a break day. As much as I didn’t like it, I needed the rest. I’d been trying to maintain my heat aura for the last 72 hours, even in my sleep. I’d like to thank Twilight for letting me borrow her thermal camera so I could record myself while sleeping. It had been extremely draining and I had dropped it a handful of times, but the progress was undeniable.

I had wanted to keep pushing forward until I had fully mastered it, carrying what I felt was some momentum, but Summer had set Fluttershy after me to make sure I rested. My lovely girlfriend had then set me down in front of her computer, put her tablet and drawing stencil in my hands, and sat on her couch to drink tea while keeping her eye on me.

It was her way of gently reminding me that I had left much of my life by the wayside in my single minded pursuit of the strength I needed to protect those I care about. I could almost hear the lecture without her saying a word. Luna, Fluttershy, and Rainbow all cared about me just as much as I cared about them. They wanted me to be happy too. And that meant not ignoring things I enjoy, like trying to learn to draw.

So I surrendered to my girlfriend’s superior wisdom and started thinking about what exactly it was I wanted to draw. I had little and less experience and this might be the hardest part of any creative process for me: figuring out what I wanted to do. It was a problem I often encountered when writing, staring at a blank page to figure out what kind of story I wanted to tell.

Eventually an idea did come to me: a self-portrait of my old self. I figured a rough drawing of my old appearance shouldn’t be too hard to draw and gave me a reasonably strict parameter to work with so I didn’t wander off script. I just hoped it would be recognizable as a human being at the end. A pessimistic thought, but there it was.

For whatever reason I thought it would look better if I were sitting down, so I got to work drawing a basic wooden chair. Four legs, a back, nothing fancy. I then started drawing from my feet up. So far so good. I don’t exactly remember how big my feet were in relation to the rest of me, nor how exactly to scale it down, but when I finished the legs and lower torso, nothing looked horribly out of place.

The upper torso soon followed, and then arms, hands, finally I turned my attention to my head and face and…I blinked and the drawing was already done. But where my face should be was a black blur. A chill ran down my spine.

“W-What a strange fluke…” I said quietly as to not disturb Fluttershy, hoping against hope that this wasn’t the omen I thought it was. I erased the entire head and…a single blink and that horrible black blur was back. Existential dread filled my being. Not remembering my old name? I could laugh it off as weird selective amnesia or part of the magic that had changed my body into a perfect replica of Ranma Saotome. That had been before confronting a cult of Changelings that worshiped some eldritch god, one with enough real power that I had felt it when Luna had challenged It to save Fluttershy.

Now trying to draw my old face I blank out completely and come to with a black void where my face should be? Not once, but twice? The likely reality of my situation started to settle in. I started trembling like a leaf in a hurricane.

“F-Fluttershy?” I called out weakly; I could barely force the words out of my mouth. Fluttershy looked up from her book.

“What’s wrong Ranma?” Her great empathy instantly attuned to how fragile my state of mind truly was.

“Luna…” The frail whisper barely escaped my lips before the panic attack fully took me.

_________________________________________________________________________

Luna was filling out paperwork when the emergency line on her phone rang. The surprise caused her to fumble with her phone for a few moments before answering.

“Luna here, what’s wrong?” Luna asked.

“Luna, I need you at my house NOW!” Fluttershy’s terrified voice came across the line. Luna wasted no time gathering the mana required for the long range teleport to Ponyville.

“I’ll be there in a moment,” Luna promised her love and hung up to better focus on the spell. Seconds later the formula finished in her head and in a flurry of sparkles, she was gone. A mere moment later she reappeared in Fluttershy’s cottage.

She surveyed the room and found her boyfriend / part time girlfriend curled into a ball on Fluttershy’s couch, silent sobs wracking his frame as he shook violently.

“Fluttershy, what happened?!” Luna demanded.

“I don’t know, Ranma was drawing and then he suddenly called my name, then yours, and then broke down!” Fluttershy told her, worry writ across her face as she tried to hold Ranma’s hand. He was utterly unresponsive to her presence.

“Where’s the drawing?” Luna asked and Fluttershy pointed to the computer. A single glance at what was on the screen and Luna’s heart stopped. Fluttershy sensed Luna’s reaction.

“What is it? Do you know what’s going on?” Fluttershy asked, eyes searching Luna’s face for answers.

Luna’s jaw worked as she tried to find the right words. How do you deliver news like this? What could possibly be said? Luna’s own heart was a war torn between despair and rage and defiance.

“Fluttershy, have you told Rainbow?” Luna asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

“I was going to after you arrived,” Fluttershy replied.

“Summon her please,” Luna replied, “I…I know not if I have the strength to explain this twice.”

Fluttershy gulped and did as bid, calling Rainbow. Luna hated this weakness within herself. She hated that as she kneeled down beside Ranma next to Fluttershy, taking his other hand that her own hands were trembling slightly. How many times had she gone into battle? How many times had she had to inform next of kin that their loved ones had fallen in battle? She was supposed to be a Princess, a leader, yet in this moment she felt no more than a little girl playing dress up.

It was a bitter reminder that no matter what position you hold, there would always be a bigger fish. Always someone…or something better, with more skill or experience or power.

Rainbow burst through the door, “What’s wrong?!”

Her eyes were drawn to the couch. To Luna and Fluttershy around the broken Ranma. Rainbow’s magenta eyes were wide in confusion and fear.

“I will explain,” Luna said, mustering every last iota of self-discipline she had to keep her voice steady. Fluttershy and Rainbow turned to her in rapt attention, eager to know the cause of their shared love’s suffering and if something could be done about it.

“To put it bluntly, Ranma’s True Name is no longer his. Thus, his identity, his very soul, is at the whim of whatever now has it,” Luna replied.

“That sounds…really bad,” Rainbow said, trying to wrap her head around the enormity of what had just been said.

“Most of the beings that deal in True Names and souls are far beyond even my power to combat or even parley with, goddess though I may be,” Luna said solemnly.

“Isn’t there anything we can do?!” Fluttershy shouted her eyes wet with tears.

“Hope is not entirely lost, but I will not lie to you. Every avenue is a long shot. At any moment Ranma could be taken from us and there would be nothing we could do. We can only pray that while we figure out our next move that whatever holds Ranma’s leash does not yank it,” Luna looked down at the floor, trying to hide how close to crying she was.

“Then we find out who has Ranma’s Name and beat them up!” Rainbow yelled full of defiant fury, “We can get the other girls and blast em with a rainbow!”

“While I doubt it will be that simple, finding out who has Ranma’s True Name might indeed be our best first step,” Luna said.

“How do we do that?” Rainbow asked.

“I will get in touch with certain beings, but for now, I just wish to remain by Ranma’s side until sleep finds him, no matter how troubled,” Luna replied gently.

Rainbow was torn between wanting immediate action and being with her loved ones. In the end, she took a place next to Luna. The three of them took silent vigil over Ranma as he rode out the panic attack.

So, the move is over and done with and boy was this one extra rough. There was a whole laundry list of bad choices (thanks Dad) and worse outcomes that went into how stressful it all was, but ultimately we're in the new house and slowly settling down and unpacking.

We're finally to the point where I have stable internet and the time to write.

I've been intending for a while for things to go somewhat down this route, but long time readers will know my habit of pinning demons to the wall with my writing when I get too stressed and depressed. Which is why this ended up the way it is. Still, I'd be lying if I said this habit wasn't helpful to me and produces what I think of as my best work. So it is what it is.