FemmeFiction

by J Carp

First published 13th of June, 2020

Three high femmes try to find love. Two yellow dorks try to take their relationship to the next level. One confused changeling tries to discover herself. Zero common sense is exercised by anyone involved.

Manehattan Pride is always a huge event, but none of the creatures travelling from Ponyville suspected it might be as terrifying, electrifying, enraging, or life-changing as it ended up being.

Moon Dancer wants to propose to Fluttershy, Trixie and Starlight want to have fun, Rarity wants to find her soulmate, and Ocellus wants to learn about sexual identity. Will they succeed, or will their combined neuroticism wreck the whole weekend?

This is the final story in the Awkward Windmills trilogy also consisting of I Am Awkward (Yellow) and It Turns Out They're Windmills. You should read them! But if you haven't basically all you need to know is that Moon Dancer moved to Ponyville and is dating Fluttershy, and both Rarity and Starlight have come out as some form of not straight. And Applejack is Fluttershy's ex, but she'll never admit it. .

Part of the Pride and Positivity 2020 event!

Hidden Femme

Here's how easy it ended up being.

The day was very mundane, which isn't to say it wasn't pleasant. Angel had done even more work at the sanctuary that he was supposed to, and so he'd been rewarded with an extra fresh carrot. Fluttershy had been rewarded with the chance to make her favorite new dish, chilled tomato soup, for when Rarity and Discord came over for dinner that night. Moon Dancer had been rewarded with the sight of Fluttershy happily puttering around the kitchen, singing to herself with that sweet, delighted little smile.

There was one moment that felt just a tiny bit special. When Moon Dancer arrived home from a quick trip to the market, and Fluttershy greeted her with a quick kiss, they both just looked into one another's eyes for a second too long. It was a tiny little thing, a brief pause between the smooch and resuming the daily routines. It felt warm and perfect, but a lot of things felt warm and perfect about living together. There was just a sense of quiet; a flash of there being nothing in the world at all but the happiness they had together, and then it was over. A very humble little instant in time.

Otherwise, it was just entirely mundane. Dinner was amiable and fun, and afterwards, they were planning to all have a cup of sweetened iced coffee (a treat Rarity had encountered recently on a recent trip to the Arabian peninsula, and which she was gleefully excited to introduce her friends to), but before they could sit down, a second Discord had barged in and frantically reminded the original that he needed to rush to visit the Kirins immediately to perform in a Noh play.

The two Discords had an elaborate "who's on first" style conversation back and forth hinging on misunderstandings of the word "Noh" which quickly escalated into an argument and then a swordfight. Chandeliers were summoned and then swung from. Roosters were thrown.

Eventually, one of the Discords vanquished the other, and there was a huge, emotional death scene: wailing and extended monologues about vengeance and sad harp music. The surviving Discord gave Fluttershy a quick hug, slung his defeated doppelganger over his shoulder, and teleported away.

So, completely mundane, yes. But still very, very nice.

Rarity was exuberant with creative, new ideas from her travels, and she was particularly inspired by what it would take to "highlight Moon Dancer's lovely eyes on a summer evening like this," listing off gown and dress ideas as fast as an auctioneer, growing animatedly determined to create her friend an ensemble, because Moon Dancer was just the ONLY one of her friends she'd never created anything for, and she is so lovely and so unique it would be a wonderful gift to them both to be able to work on something.

Fluttershy glanced at her special somepony very briefly; it was that familiar look of "Just checking if all this attention is more flattering or more embarrassing." Moon Dancer felt her face naturally shifting into a "flattering," and the two of them leaned against one another and contendedly listened to Rarity, carried away with her vision.

"...oh, of course I understand that dressing, ah, 'down' has its own homey charm," she was saying. "I've grown to appreciate 'Old Bertha,' but surely glamour has its own appeal! There must be something I could make for you!"

"Um, Old Bertha?" Fluttershy asked.

"Old Bertha," Moon Dancer replied, rolling her eyes, "is what Rarity calls my sweater."

"And a delightfully lived-in sweater she is!" Rarity said quickly. "She has a... um. A wonderful personality!"

Moon Dancer couldn't keep herself from laughing gently. "She thanks you. And look, I really do appreciate all these ideas, and I really do think you're a great designer! But..."

"Oh, think of Fluttershy, though!" Rarity argued. "Why, anypony who knows you can see how perfect you are together. Her calming kindness and gentle grace helping you to accept and manage your emotions! Your sincere curiosity and powerful intellect providing her constant challenge, novelty, and validation! But wouldn't you like even strangers to see it? Any dress I'd make would be specifically designed to look good on you... next to her."

"Oh." Moon Dancer blushed, both from the compliments and from Rarity's doggedness. "That does sound nice. But the thing is... I... kind of don't really like dresses?" She immediately felt terrible for saying this to Rarity of all ponies and winced. "I mean, I like your dresses! I just never think dresses look good on me."

Rarity frowned thoughtfully for two full seconds, and then her face brightened up with jubilant extroversion. "Oh, well, you don't need a dress to look sharp. What about a suit, then?" She gasped as if her own suggestion was the most wonderful surprise she'd received all week. "Yes! What about a suit?! Oh, Moon Dancer, please let me make you a suit; it's just the challenge I need to kick-start my creativity for the coming season. Urban-intellectual, post-classic, soft butch chic! Oh please do let me make it!"

Moon Dancer rubbed the back of her head, blushing. "Um. Well. I do like to wear suits sometimes. I... never really get a chance to, though."

"We'll find a reason!" Fluttershy barked loudly, before immediately blushing and covering her face with her hooves. At her special somepony's surprised look, she shook her head quickly. "You don't have to if you don't want to! But. Just if you did want to. I wouldn't mind. At all."

Moon Dancer smiled gently and leaned against Fluttershy, feeling warm. "Oh, all right," she said to Rarity. "If you think I can be, uh, soft butch chic, then who am I to say no?"

"Eee, how exciting!" Rarity enthused. "I don't think I've even seen you in a suit since... goodness, was it the party where the two of you met?"

Moon Dancer thought, then nodded. "Yeah, right before I moved here."

"Why, that was a year and a half ago!" Rarity exclaimed. "My goodness, even Old Bertha must think you should dress up more often!"

"Eh, I dunno," Moon Dancer replied, shrugging. "I only have that one suit. I just wore it at the party because I got it for my sister's wedding, and it felt silly to spend all those bits and then never touch it again."

"Hm," Fluttershy said, "Honeysuckle didn't have a problem with you not wearing a dress, right?"

"No, she was really supportive! She surprised everyone by wanting a really traditional Tarpanish wedding, so I was a little worried, but she was great about it."

"Oh!" Rarity exclaimed. "I didn't know your family was Tarpanish."

Moon Dancer nodded. "Mm hmm! I mean... we're not particularly great Tarpans. We pretty much just celebrate Rosh Horseshanah once a year and avoid truffles." She paused. "Well, I eat truffles sometimes, but I know I shouldn't."

"We lit the marenorah this year," Fluttershy pointed out. "Angel realy liked it."

"Yeah... that was pretty nice," Moon Dancer replied, nodding. "It helped me feel like I really lived here."

"I'm sure!" Rarity replied, eyes dancing with thoughts of romance. "Had you ever thought about whether you'd want a Tarpanish wedding?"

"Oh, I don't know. I guess there are some things that might be nice about it." Moon Dancer smiled gently. "It'd be cool to have a hoofah... recite the eleven blessings." She shrugged and nodded over to her special somepony. "But, I'm not the only one deciding. It's half up to Fluttershy, isn't it?"

"Oh, I think it'd be wonderful to include something," Fluttershy said. "I like the idea of having parts of the ceremony important to both our families. We should do it."

There was a very long pause.

Moon Dancer wasn't sure why they were pausing for the first part of it. The realization snuck up on her like a boogeyman. Her mouth fell open.

"Did..." Rarity sputtered wordlessly for a few moments, then finally collected herself enough to speak. "Did you just get engaged?"

"I... think we did?" Fluttershy answered, staring at Moon Dancer in shock.

"N...no!" Moon Dancer barked. "Engagement is... it's when you plan and..." She waved her hooves around, trying desperately to explain. "I mean, yes, we're gonna get married, right? We already pretty much knew it!"

"Right!" Fluttershy squeaked, burying her face behind her front legs. "I want to and I know you want to!"

"Yes! We agree about that! But... but engagement isn't just when two ponies agree they're going to get married!"

With a puff of smoke, Discord suddenly appeared, shocking Moon Dancer so badly, she fell over. "I forgot my bowtie," he explained, oddly calm given the circumstances. "And that is exactly what an engagement is."

"No! Engagement is when you agree to get married, not when you agree that you'll get married! It's an entirely different conjunction!"

"Discord," Fluttershy murmured in a daze, "I'm going to get married."

Discord clipped his bowtie on and frowned. "My dear Fluttershy, are you all right?"

"What does 'Fluttershy' mean?" Fluttershy asked, staring smilingly at nothing.

Discord took a step back, biting his lip anxiously. "Oh no, I think Fluttershy might have broken." He looked up at the other two ponies. "What should I do? My best friend is broken, but the delegate from the kappas won't sign the treaty unless this Noh performance goes perfectly!"

"Why even is this Noh thing your problem?!" Moon Dancer snapped.

"I may have, ah, misjudged how much sense of humor the kappa king has about his magic nightingale," Discord answered, not sounding very guilty. "And then I made some promises... well, let's just say there's a giant cucumber involved."

"I want precisely zero more details about this situation."

"Well fine, but..." Discord paused and looked down. Fluttershy had a gentle hoof pressed against his side.

"It's all right," she said. "I'm very, very surprised, but I'm also very, very happy. I'm so glad you came back so I could share this with you, but it's really okay if you have to go."

"Yes, and we're not even engaged!" Moon Dancer yelped. At Fluttershy's slightly alarmed look, she groaned and waved her hooves frantically. "No, I mean... we're going to get married! But the engagement is important! Like... Lyra and Bon Bon! They had their weird psychic connection mutual engagement thing."

Fluttershy frowned slightly. "We're not competing with Lyra and Bon Bon."

"No, I know! I just..." Moon Dancer sighed and stepped closer to her fiancee, giving her a tiny smooch on the forehead. "Look," she said, notably calmer, "we're going to get married. I've never been more certain of anything. But... you know I get weird about stuff sometimes, and I just want to do it right. I want to ask, and you say yes, and it's romantic. I don't want it to be just something that happens because it's tossed out in some random conversation."

Fluttershy looked back at her for a moment, then smiled. "I don't need anything big, but I do like it when you're romantic. It's okay if I tell my friends, though, right?"

"Of course!"

Fluttershy, grinning like a seraph, looked over at Discord and Rarity. "We're getting married," she announced.

Discord started to speak and then paused. "This warm feeling..." he murmured. "This... this is the feeling I've been waiting for!" He burst into the sky like a firework and swooped back down, embracing Fluttershy tightly. "Oh, thank you! This feeling of joy and friendship has finally reignited the spark of acting inspiration I've been waiting for! You've saved the kappa kingdom!" He twirled and vanished.

"Discord's life is really stupid," Moon Dancer remarked.

"Oh, hush," Fluttershy admonished without a hint of actual anger. She giggled, and they snuggled up. After a few seconds of canoodling, Moon Dancer felt Fluttershy's head turn to look to the side. "Rarity?"

Moon Dancer realized that their friend had not said a word since the whole thing had happened. In fact, Rarity looked utterly stunned, staring at them with a frozen gape. "Uhmmm... are you okay?" Moon Dancer asked.

Rarity did not respond for several seconds, but very suddenly, like a switch being flicked, her face lit up into an enormous smile. She ran at the fiancees, glomming onto them both in a huge hug. "Oh, I am just so happy for you!" she squealed. "I can't believe you're engaged, I can't believe you're engaged!!"

"We're not engAAGH!" Moon Dancer started to say before Rarity's hug clamped down even tighter.

Fluttershy closed her eyes, smiling softly (Rarity apparently instinctually knew to be gentle with her, even in ecstatic joy-pounces). "We're getting married, but we're not engaged yet."

"Well!" Rarity suddenly pulled back, still smiling. She poked a facetiously stern hoof at Moon Dancer, who was too busy catching her breath to get much out of it. "I certanly approve of romantic gestures, but I know sommmeeeee ponnniiieessss occassionally have the slight tendency to make big plans about something, and then to get so anxious and carried away by planning, they never end up doing the thing they planned."

"Uhm." Moon Dancer blushed. "Well..."

"I'm talking about Moon Dancer," Rarity clarified. "And Twilight. And, well, me, honestly. But Moon Dancer is the important one here!"

"Okay okay, message received," Moon Dancer said, sighing. "I promise I'll do it soon. It'll be..."

"Oh, there is so much to do!" Rarity sang. She skipped happily to the door. "I'll leave you two alone to celebrate, but don't worry: my mind is absolutely frantic with ideas for everything! Aaaaaaaaaa...." Still squealing, she pulled the front door open.

"Wait, you don't have to..." Fluttershy began, but Rarity had already trotted off into the night.

Trixie always felt ambivalent about waking up. On the one hoof, it was just unacceptably rude that her repose had to be interrupted by anything. On the other hoof, whenever she woke up, she got to remember that she was Trixie, and that was always one of the highlights of the whole day.

But that morning, waking was an unusually jarring experience. The bed felt unfamiliar, the clinking noises and tuneless humming were certainly unfamiliar; she opened her eyes and the entire room was new and weird. Everything was comfortable and pleasant, but it was all so different that she was just confused.

"I'm Trixie," she thought, and immediately things were centered again. She cast a tired gaze around and remembered: of course it's where she woke up, because it's where she went to sleep. That was not all she had done there, either.

The door opened and Rarity trotted in. "Good morrrrnning!" she greeted with almost terrifyingly cheerful perkiness. "I hope you're hungry! There's breakfast!"

Trixie did not fail to notice the tinge of mania in Rarity's eyes or tone. "Riiiiight," she replied cagily.

"Come on, sleepyhead!" Rarity yanked the comforter off the bed, nearly flipping Trixie onto the floor.

"Mnf!" Trixie glared, upset her comfy little lair had been destroyed. "Careful!"

"Oh dear, I'm sorry!" Rarity said with cheerful sunniness. "I'm just so excited for you to eat! Ricotta on toast with melons and berries!"

"Well. You've at least catered to my urbane tastes." Trixie hopped out of bed, trying her best to maintain normalcy. "Excuse me a moment to freshen up."

"Of course!" Rarity answered, grinning. Trixie slipped into the bathroom and shut the door behind her.

She feared she might look less-than-amazing, but a glance in the mirror told her things weren't too bad. She'd had a chance to take a quick shower before sleeping, and except for a little bit of frizziness in her mane, things were up to par. She looked even more rested than usual. "Maybe sleeping in an actual bed is a good idea," she mumbled, splashing a little water onto her face and drying it, before turning the hoof towel into a teacup and teleporting it off to the teacup dump.

She didn't exactly regret the previous night's events; Rarity had lived up to her Avatar Of Generosity reputation, which meant they were nicely compatible there. She'd always found Rarity attractive, and she grudgingly even found her agreeable to spend time with when they tried to move past their shared history. But she just had an odd feeling in her gut about everything, and she couldn't quite explain it. It was with very slight hesitation she opened the bathroom door and walked out.

Rarity had not moved, her wide, toothy smile still frozen on her face. Trixie blinked.

"Breakfast!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Uh huh." Trixie glanced around, wondering, not for the first time, if Rarity was a serial killer. (She thought it was about a 40/60 chance that at least one of Twilight's friends was, but she'd always most strongly suspected the apple.)

"If anything, YOU'RE acting weird!" Rarity declared.

"Ummmm." Trixie began inching toward the window.

"Breakfast," Rarity repeated.

"Yeah. Uh, I think I'm just gonna go. Okay? I..."

"Don't you dare!!" Rarity immediately darted forward, glaring into Trixie's face and poking her in the chest with an angry hoof. "Listen to me. I am NOT the kind of mare who does what we did last night and then refrains from making the other pony breakfast. So go! Eat! My delicious! Toast!!"

Her frown instantly switched into the same smile from before. She turned and trotted off into the kitchen.

Trixie considered making a break for it, but again, that weird feeling loomed up even stronger than her surprise or alarm. She followed Rarity, not quite even knowing why.

The breakfast did look amazing, and as they sat down, Trixie could not help but be impressed by the spread. When she was seated, Rarity happily levitated the coffee urn up to pour into a delicate little mug, then followed it with almost as much cream. "I think I remember you like your coffee this way. No sugar, right?"

"Uh, right," Trixie replied as Rarity softly set the coffee mug down next to her plate. "Thank you!" she added, successfully battling the desire to brag that of course such a special pony as herself would be deserving of everyone remembering her tastes.

Rarity smiled genuinely in response and nodded to the food. "Please, have whatever you want!"

Trixie nervously brought some toast up to her mouth and took a bite. "Mmm!" she enthused, half-recognizing that it was quite delectable, and Rarity cheerfully began eating as well.

It was two bites in that Trixie's stomach really began to feel weird. She just kept looking up at Rarity taking her tiny, feminine nibbles and daintily wiping her mouth with a pearl-white cloth, and things weren't sitting right. She tried to ignore it, to focus on what was turning out to be quality pampering, but it was too distracting.

With a sudden jolt, she realized what the problem was. "Oh no," she said.

Rarity turned to her in surprise. "What is it, darling?"

"I care." Trixie set her toast down and sighed.

"...What?"

"You!" Trixie grunted. "You're obviously not doing okay, and I care about it. Nnnnggg, this is so annoying!"

"What are you talking about?" Rarity laughed very fakely. "I'm doing perfe..."

"No no no, quiet quiet quiet," Trixie snapped, pressing her hoof up against Rarity's mouth to close it. "Just tell me. Apparently we're in each other's lives, and so this?" She waved her hooves around vaguely, indicating the whole room. "All this? It's bothering me."

"Trixie... stoppit!" Rarity pushed Trixie's leg away. "...Trixie, really, I'm perfectly well!"

Trixie heaved an enormous sigh and rolled her eyes. "I should have known it last night. You picked me up... and of course you did, I'm the most gorgeous pony in town after all... but that's not the kind of thing you normally do. And you did say that thing about wanting a 'distraction.' And... look, could you seriously stop smiling at me like that because it is really starting to creep me out."

Rarity did stop smiling. She pulled back for a moment, then sighed. "Even you could tell something was wrong?"

"I'm a professional counselor, Rarity."

But Rarity just sighed and swooned and flung herself backwards onto the ground. "I can't believe I couldn't even keep Trixie from being able to tell!" she wailed.

"...Actually kind of insulted now."

"Everypony knows my life is a mess just from looking at me!" Rarity wriggled on her back, waving her hooves in the air pitifully. "Fluttershy is getting married and I've never even had a special somepony and I'm going to be alone forevvveeerrrrrr!"

Trixie froze for a moment, half suppressing her irritation and half deciding what to say. She did not get a chance to speak, however, because the door to the outside suddenly slammed open and an adorable filly bounced in, chanting, "Special Sister Saturday! Special Sister Saturday!"

Sweetie Belle came to a stop before them, Rarity still on her back, Trixie sitting at her place. She looked at them, tilting her head to the side quizzically. They looked back.

"Um. Rarity? Why are you on the floor? And why are you with Trixie?"

Rarity jumped to her hooves frantically. "Sweetie! You! What? Why! How do? What?"

Sweetie Belle tilted her head more. "That's a lot of questions." She pointed at Trixie. "Really, why are you with Trixie the first thing in the morning? You're..." She trailed off thoughtfully.

"How... you've met Trixie?" Rarity bleated, bugging her eyes out.

"I see her at the friendship school when I tutor! Did she... did she spend the night?"

"Ack!" Rarity gaped at her little sister. "Sweetie Belle, what do you even know about ponies spending the night places?!"

"Um. I know, like." She blushed cutely. "I know there's kissing and stuff." She suddenly gasped, her face blossoming into excitement. "Wait! Are you dating Trixie?! That's so cool!"

"No!" Rarity yipped immediately. "No no no. No! Absolutely not, no." She looked at Trixie, then back to Sweetie. "No."

"Then why are you acting so weird?" Sweetie began to frown, and even the slightest bit of sadness on her face was heartbreaking to see.

"I... I'm just surprised! Ha ha yes just surprised, ha ha. I didn't know you'd be coming!"

"You... forgot about Special Sister Saturday?" Sweetie sniffled, tears coming to her eyes. "We were going to go to the mane salon together. Did you not even make our appointments?"

"Sweetie! I..." Rarity calmed slightly, taking a deep breath and walking closer to her sister. "No, of course I didn't forget, and I did make the appointments. I just got my days mixed up. I'm still planning to go with you."

"Well... okay." Sweetie suddenly looked up firmly. "But why aren't you telling me what's going on with Trixie? You promised you wouldn't treat me like a foal anymore!"

"It's... it's not about that! This... I..." Rarity looked absolutely helpless as she sputtered, and Trixie was surprised that she wasn't surprised she came to her aid.

"Hey, Sweetie," she said, beckoning. "C'mere. I'll fill you in." Sweetie, with a glance to her sister, hesitantly walked over to the table. "Have a seat; pour yourself some coffee, if you want."

Sweetie smiled brightly at the offer, sitting across from Trixie. "Thanks, but I don't like coffee."

"Suit yourself." Trixie took a sip out of her own mug, feeling herself enter her workplace groove. "Hey. So listen, you have to forgive Rarity, okay? She and I did spend last night kissing and stuff, but it can be realllllly awwwwwwkward to talk about that kind of thing with your own family. You get it, right? She's not trying to keep anything secret."

"Yeah, but..." Sweetie glanced over at Rarity, who still looked gobsmacked. "But if I kissed somecreature, I'd want to tell her!"

"Maybe, but you'd still feel totally weird if she walked in right after you had the kiss, right? Even if it was with somecreature as gloriously attractive as myself."

Sweetie giggled, completely charmed. "I guess so. But... you said you were kissing, and Rarity said you weren't dating. That doesn't make any sense."

In alarm, Rarity started to babble something, but Trixie held up a hoof. Rarity, surprisingly, fell quiet.

"Here's the thing about that," Trixie replied carefully. "Usually, ponies are dating when they spend the night, and when they kiss and stuff. But sometimes, two friends might decide to do things like that, without it meaning anything more."

Sweetie blinked, looking more confused than anything else. "Really? Friends?"

Trixie realized she'd just called Rarity her friend without even thinking about it, but she didn't let the subsequent mixed emotions distract her. "Yes! It can be really fun. But it's also easy to get your feelings hurt. It's gotta be just the right kind of friend, and you have to make sure you're totally on the same page first! So it doesn't happen much, and you have to be careful. And some creatures really want to only kiss their special somecreatures, and that's fine, too. Get it?"

"Mm-hmm!" Sweetie answered, nodding happily. She idly picked up some toast and munched it.

Trixie grinned. "Now, I have to go. You have have a sister day to enjoy!" At Sweetie's nod, Trixie's grin became sneakier. "You're going to the salon later? I have an idea for you." She leaned over the table, whispering in Sweetie's ear.

Sweetie smiled brightly. "Ooh! That's a great idea!"

Trixie winked. "See you at school! I have to go say goodbye to your sister." She started walking off to the exit. "C'mon," she grunted to Rarity as she passed.

They walked out the doorstep, Rarity shutting the door behind her. She turned to Trixie, her mouth hanging open. "That was so impressive!" she sputtered. "How did you do that?"

"Um, it's almost like I'm a professional counselor, or something."

"Right." Rarity blinked at her, uncomprehendingly. "Yes."

Trixie sighed, rolling her eyes magnificently. "It's okay to be jealous of your friend for getting engaged as long as you're not a jerk about it. Your life is not a mess, and to remind yourself of that, spend some quality time with your little sister, who's great and who adores you. Last night was fun, I guess. Here." She levitated up a deck of cards, spread wide. "Pick one."

Rarity wordlessly complied. "It's the six of hearts," Trixie said. "Ta da." She snatched Rarity's card and swooshed the deck away. "Bye."

She turned, but Rarity's voice stopped her. "W...wait!" Trixie turned back, raising an eyebrow, and was frozen when she felt lips smacking lightly against her own. "Um. Thank you. Goodbye, darling." There was a pause, and Rarity began to blush. "Was that odd?"

"Yes. But it's fine. I'd want to kiss me, too." She smirked and received a wavering smile in response.

Rarity turned and opened her front door, but she jumped back when Sweetie Belle instantly stuck her head out, waving frantically. "Bye, Trixie! Thanks for the suggestion!! I think I will have them dye my mane green!"

As Rarity's jaw fell, Trixie chortled and walked away.

"Technically," Mudbriar corrected, "agreeing to get married is exactly what an engagement is."

"Oh, don't you start in on me," Moon Dancer grunted, rolling her eyes but unable to keep a grin completely off her face. "I just have to think of how to do it. And when. And where."

"I'll help!" Trixie offered. "I do know a little something about spectacle and splendor, after all!"

"Uh, I dunno about that," Starlight remarked, checking the water level inside the magic cauldron. "It doesn't need to be a big deal, right? Maybe just something quiet and intimate?"

The fifth pony present raised his hoof to get attention, but said nothing. Everyone stared at him.

"Uh, Snails?" Moon Dancer asked. Snails did not reply.

Moon Dancer glanced around nervously. "Uh, is he..."

Snails very suddenly sneezed, making a sound like a trumpet falling off a cliff. "Woo!" he mused, then turned to Moon Dancer. "Uh, what were you saying? I was thinking about how I was going to sneeze, and then I was thinking about sneezing, and then I was thinking about how I had just sneezed."

"Uh, how's that magic cauldron going?" Trixie asked, clearly trying to keep things from getting too derailed.

"It'll just be a minute!" Starlight answered. "The spell has to warm up, but we're almost set."

Moon Dancer looked around hesitantly. "So, when it's ready, we'll be able to just... talk to this student in the cauldron? We'll see her and she'll see us?" At Starlight's cheerful nod, she frowned. "And... she's not, really upset, is she? I'm not trained for this. What if I say the wrong thing and I mess up her psychological development?"

"Ug, it's fine," Trixie moaned, rolling her eyes. "She's just a little confused, and she said she's happy for you to be around. Nice try at changing the subject away from hiring me to do a magic show where you propose to Fluttershy, but it didn't work!"

"Uh. I... appreciate the offer, but I think it can't be something with so much preparation." She grinned anxiously, then fretted. "I've promised myself I've got to do it before our trip to Manehattan next week."

"Oh, that's right, Manehattan Pride is next week!" Starlight beamed. "It kinda snuck up on us, huh? It's so exciting! It's my first chance to go since I've been, um. Out." Her voice dropped to a near whisper when she said the last word, but she was still proud of herself for saying it.

"Maud and I would attend if I didn't hate traveling," Mudbriar stated. "However, I do hate traveling, so the decision not to attend is rational. It's nice when things work out."

"You're all missing out!" Trixie laughed. She tromped over to Starlight and threw a hoof around her best friend's shoulders. "Well, while the rest of you sit around being old and engaged and boring, the two of US are going to spend the weekend out, meeting ponies!" She grinned lacivously. "Meeting ponies. You know what I'm saying." Mudbriar and Snails both stared back at her, giving no indication at all that they knew what she was saying.

"Aahaha," Starlight mumbled, feeling the sweat already start. "Well. In theory yes! We will go and I will, um." Trixie raised an eyebrow at her. "Fffffffflirt? Uh. Hook upppppp?"

"Right," Trixie agreed, "except when we actually do it don't phrase it like an alien trying to blend in with Equestrian society."

Starlight suddenly gasped, her trepidation forgotten. "Moon Dancer!" she exclaimed. "I just had a great idea! You should ask Fluttershy to marry you at pride!"

"Gck!" Moon Dancer started backwards. "What?"

"It's perfect! Right? It can still be quiet and intimate, but the element of kindness gets engaged at pride?! It'd be such a wonderful story!"

"I..." Moon Dancer squinted in thought. "Yes, you're right, but... I just don't want it to be too complicated. It can't go wrong."

"We'll help!" Starlight nudged Trixie, who looked less than enthusiastic. "You'll have friends helping you! And Rarity's going, so she can help Fluttershy if she needs it!"

"....I'll think about it," Moon Dancer answered. "Please don't get ahead of yourself! ....I'll think about it."

Starlight grinned, entirely pleased with herself from having helped somepony, but a quiet tone rang out before she could say anything else. "Oh, I think we're almost ready!" She said, turning to the cauldron, happy to be reminded of yet another creature she could help. "Everypony just gather around here and I'll trigger the spell. We should be able to see her in the water, she she'll see us in her own cauldron."

"Um, Starlight?" Trixie said, nudging her best friend softly. "You are going to let me take the lead on this, right? You know... since it was my idea, and this is my job, and everything?"

"Of course!" Starlight promised. "I'm just here to work the spell. I won't even say anything, if you don't want me to!"

"Well." Trixie nodded huffily. "Fine then. I'll..."

"Just because you do things differently than I used to, that doesn't mean I want to butt in! I'm not the guidance counselor anymore. I know that."

Trixie stared at her with half-lidded eyes.

"You help the students, and that's the important thing. But. I mean, it's just different, is all. Not worse! Just different."

Trixie sighed. "Is it out of your system?"

"Almost! I am totally going to be going crazy wanting to jump in but I won't because it's not my job anymore and because I trust you and because I can't control everything!" Starlight took a deep breath. "Okay, that did it, I'm fine now."

Trixie nodded smartly and walked up to the cauldron, apparently completely satisfied. The others followed a few steps behind.

"Y'know, I always wondered how the two of you can be so close, but then also work together," Moon Dancer remarked, taking her place in the circle around the cauldron.

"The key," Trixie said sagely, "is when it's important, you learn to get good at listening. And when it's not important, you learn to get good at pretending to listen."

Starlight opened her mouth as if to argue, then just shrugged. "Everypony ready?"

"Wait," Moon Dancer giggled. "Mudbriar's making a funny face at me." She nudged him away with her hoof. "Stop it! This is serious! We have to help a student."

Mudbriar stared at her, making no facial expression whatsoever.

"Stop!" Moon Dancer coughingly gethered herself and took a deep breath. "Okay! It's fine. I..." She let one more chortle slip, then stood up straight. "I'm good! Mudbriar just knows he can make me laugh. Ahem. I'm ready."

Mudbriar stared at her, making no facial expression whatsoever.

"Uh." Starlight looked back and forth between them, then just gave up trying to think of a response. "Well, okay, I'm casting the spell now."

Her horn lit up, and the cauldron began to glow. After a few moments, the surface of the water shifted to the colorful face of a young changeling.

"Hi, Ocellus!" Starlight said. "Do you see us?"

Ocellus grinned and moved her lips.

"Wait... wait, we can't hear you," Starlight said. "Is... hold on, is the sound coming through for you?"

Ocellus nodded, moving her lips, She looked off to the side and said something, and the image of her in the water jostled slightly.

"Can you... hold on. Did you make sure the water was lukewarm? Um... wait, maybe the problem's on our end. Trixie, could you..."

"--UST TRY AGAIN?" Ocellus's voice suddenly boomed out of the cauldron, causing all of the ponies to yelp in surprise.

"Agh!" Starlight frantically adjusted the magic flowing into the cauldron. "You were..." She blinked at the water, which now just showed a blank hive ceiling. "Uh... Ocellus?"

A grizzly bear's head hesitantly poked back into the image. "...you yelled and it startled me."

"You were just really loud for a second, but it's fixed now. We're coming in clear?"

Ocellus quickly turned back into a changeling and nodded, rubbing her front hooves together nervously. "Sorry I asked to talk over summer break. I didn't know the magic would be hard to use."

"No no, it's fine!" Starlight assured her. "Even if you weren't one of our very best students, we've got to get used to using magic cauldrons, anyway; it's going to make parent-teacher conferences much easier. Now, what's..." She trailed off, noticing Trixie's glare. "Um. I mean, so I'm going to let Trixie step in, because she's the guidance counselor and this is her job."

Trixie nodded firmly but was able to instantly switch to a warm smile. "Hey!" she greeted. "I heard you wanted to talk about some identity stuff?"

"Y...yeah." Ocellus paused but only for a second. "It's just... I was thinking about a lot of stuff, and. Well, everyone here is really nice and open, but I think I picked up some really non-changeling ways of looking at things?"

"Which is fine!" Thorax's voice suddenly called from somewhere to Ocellus's left. "We just don't know how..." He trailed off. "Right, I promised I wouldn't jump in. Sorry."

Ocellus's glare turned into a forgiving smile, then she looked back down at the water. "Yeah. It's just... everycreature at school has been talking a lot about dating, and apparently there's all sorts of, like... THINGS you can be about that? Like, Smolder visited last week, and she told me she was 'pansexual,' and that she was a she. And that made total sense to her, but I had no idea what she was talking about! She also said she was a dragon, but I think I get that part." She blinked. "Although maybe not?"

"I understand," Trixie said warmly. "It makes a lot of sense you'd be confused about this. You see, ponies can't change their bodies with magic like you can, right? So we think of ourselves as being a certain way. Like how Sandbar is an earth pony, but I'm a unicorn."

Ocellus nodded slowly. "Okayyyyy. But what's that have to do with dating?"

"Well, there's all sorts of ways we can be there, too! Some ponies only want to date certain other kinds of ponies."

"Oh. So, like, there's some unicorns that only want to date other unicorns?"

"Ah, no!" Trixie replied with some alarm. "No! That... uh. That is not what I mean, and it is not part of a good friendship lesson to think like that. Uh, what I'm saying is... uh. Well, I brought some friends along to be examples, that might help!" She jumped next to Moon Dancer, pulling her close. "See, this is Moon Dancer! She teaches an advanced-level seminar at the school on Fridays, so you might have seen her around campus. And she is a cis, gay mare!"

"Um." Moon Dancer tried to fix her jostled glasses and grinned nervously into the cauldron. "Yes! That's me! Hi!"

"Hiiii?" Ocellus scratched her head in confusion.

"'Mare' means she's a she!" Trixie explained. "And 'cis' means she started out with a female body, which matches being called 'she.' And 'gay' means she's attracted to other shes. Like, she's attracted to me, but she wouldn't be attracted to Sandbar!"

"Well okay Sandbar is like sixteen, so please don't use him as an example!" Moon Dancer blurted. "And it is very awkward that you used yourself as an example! But yes! Pretty much that's right! Get it?" She grinned hugely, sweating bullets. The look on Ocellus's face showed that she did not, in fact, get it.

"Um, and this is Snails!" Trixie said quickly, gesturing to her left. "You've met him; he's the assistant hoofball coach. And he is a trans, straight stallion!" Snails waved at the water languidly. "'Stallion' means he's a he, and 'trans' means he had a body doctors called 'female,' which doesn't match him being a he. And 'straight' means he's attracted to shes!"

Ocellus blinked uncomprehendingly. "Um. I get that you can't just change like we can, but what does it mean to 'be' a he? Like... in your mind but not in your body?"

Snails stared, with glazed eyes, into the water.

"Uh, Snails, buddy?" Trixie whispered.

"Huh?"

"Any thoughts you could give would be helpful, I think."

"Oh! Uhhhhh." Snails blinked twice, slowly, then nodded with sage wisdom. "Don't try too hard to hold in a sneeze, or your head will explode."

Ocellus tilted her head, baffled. "What?"

"I just said a thought I had," Snails explained. "Is it true?"

"No," Moon Dancer answered.

"Oh well. That's a relief! I was scared for a minute." Snails resumed his blank gazing.

"I..." Ocellus began, but Trixie desperately darted over to the final member of their circle.

"And this is Mudbriar! He's a cis stallion, and he's, uh..." She paused. "He's a grey ace sapiosexual demiromantic?"

"Technically," Mudbriar explained, "I'm a grey ace demisexual sapioromantic."

"Yes! He's that. It means... something."

Ocellus looked off to the side where Thorax's voice had come from. Apparently receiving no help, she looked back. "I... think I'm even more confused than before," she said.

"Just... okay, don't get lost in the details," Trixie replied. "The point is, we ponies... and lots of other creatures... ARE things on the inside. The same way Yona is a yak but Gallus is a griffin. And there's a whole bunch of different things creatures can be. It's how we think of ourselves, and it's how we feel best about ourselves."

"Okay, so... um." Ocellus scrunched up her forehead in concentration. "Moon Dancer there is gay, and that's just how she is on the inside, like how being a unicorn is how she is on the outside? She feels best thinking of herself as gay and being a she, because other ways of thinking about it don't make sense to her?"

"That's right!" Trixie answered cheerfully.

"I'm going to marry Fluttershy but we're not engaged!" Moon Dancer yipped.

Luckily, Ocellus kept going with her thought without being distracted by that. "Okay, but... am I something on the inside, too? How would I know?"

"Just through experience, and from meeting a lot of different creatures," Trixie answered. "It's okay to find it confusing for a while!"

"That's scary, though," Ocellus muttered. "What if I'm something weird? What if I'm something I don't want to be?"

"Sometimes it is scary," Trixie confirmed. "But unless you're hurting other creatures, there's no way to be bad. In fact, Moon Dancer, Starlight and I are planning to go to a big celebration next week that's just meant to remind us of that!"

"Whoa, really?"

"Yes! It's called Manehattan Pride, and it's all about feeling good about all the different things I'm talking about. Sometimes, everycreature needs to be reminded of it."

Very abruptly, Starlight got an idea. It was a really great idea, and she very much wanted to blurt it out. She tried to remind herself that this was Trixie's show.

"Wow. That sounds amazing."

Yes, Starlight agreed that her idea did sound amazing. But she couldn't say it. She had willpower; she could control herself. She would not state out loud her perfect, awesome idea.

"Yeah! So..."

"You should come with us!!" Starlight bellowed, sticking her head into the circle and grinning at Ocellus. "You should come to pride!!"

Trixie stared at her. Starlight almost felt bad.

"...Go with you?"

"Yeah! You'll be able to see all the diversity firsthoof! And... wagh!" She felt herself being dragged backwards and looked back to see the characteristic glow of Trixie's magic yanking on her tail.

"Um please give us a moment, would you, Ocellus?" Trixie asked sweetly before galloping away, Starlight yanking her tail out of the telekinesis and following in annoyance.

"What's wrong?" Starlight asked quietly when they were a few meters away.

"Starlight!" Trixie waved her hooves around frantically. "Next week is our vacation. We can't bring Ocellus!"

"Sure we can," Starlight argued. "We'll just get her a chaperone! Someone responsible, like Applejack!"

"No, Starlight..."

"Trust me! You're the counselor now, but I've worked with Ocellus for longer. She's really mature!"

"That is not the point!" Trixie hissed. "The point is that you and I plan to... to do things that are very much not appropriate for students to be around! I don't want her to see some super-hot nonbinary griffon leaving my hotel room Saturday morning and tell her hive about it!"

"She wouldn't even be around us," Starlight assured her. "We'd just meet with her for a couple of parades, and the rest of the time, she's Applejack's problem."

"Starl..." Trixie put a hoof against her forehead. "No. Just no! It's too much! We can't take Ocellus to pride!"

"Excuse me," Mudbriar said, appearing like magic directly behind them, "Thorax wants to talk to you about how happy he is you're taking Ocellus to pride."

Trixie stared at him in shock. "Whu... bah..."

"Those are not words," Mudbriar pointed out helpfully.

"Trust me, Trixie," Starlight said. "She won't have a hotel room near us, we won't see her except a couple times during daytime, and she'll have a full-time chaperone. It'll be great! I promise." She trotted over to the cauldron, leaving her best friend in shock behind her.

"...so that's when I realized," Snails was saying, "the reason my ear hurt is because both of the chopsticks were still stuck right in there!"

Thorax and Ocellus, who both stared nonplussed out of the cauldron's water, looked very relieved to see Starlight return. "Yes, very interesting," Thorax said. "But I just wanted to thank Starlight for offering to take Ocellus with her next week. We changelings are still learning about love as a feeling and not just as a food; Ocellus's new experiences will help all of us!"

"I get to lead a discussion seminar about it when I get back!" Ocellus exclaimed, nearly trembling with happy excitement.

Trixie returned, glaring, but she saw the changelings' enthusiasm and just sighed. "We still need to find a chaperone," she declared. "You can only go if we make sure it's totally safe."

"I understand!" Ocellus replied, still beaming.

"Starlight will be arranging everything," Trixie added. "Because... she's headmare. And she's your guidance counselor, I guess."

"Okay! Thank you, Starlight!"

Trixie walked away without saying anything else. She was out of the room before Starlight realized she hadn't even said goodbye.

"Uh..." She blinked and looked back at Ocellus. "Right. Yes! I'll be in touch about arranging things, all right?"

"Okay! Goodbye! Have a good afternoon!" Ocellus waved, then glanced off to the side. "So, how do we..." The water went dark.

"I don't think I wrecked her development," Moon Dancer said. "Right?" She looked around hopefully. "I was good? I didn't say anything that'll leave scars or something?"

But Starlight barely listened. She just frowned at the door Trixie had gone through.

Snails sneezed again.

From Femme to Stern

"So... you're jealous of Fluttershy, but you don't want to tell her?"

"Oh, Applejack!" Rarity yanked a spool of thread off the shelf, probably not even paying any attention to what she was doing. "How can you say it so bluntly? This is a terrible situation!" And, sure enough, she dropped the spool and began shuffling through the overstuffed shelves again. "Terrible and huge and... terribly hugely terrible!"

"I'm saying it bluntly for a reason," Applejack pointed out. "'Cause ain't this exactly the same as a friendship lesson you learned a real long time ago?"

"...Oh. Is it?"

"Yup. It actually might have been the first one you learned after Twilight came to town."

"Was it the fashion show debacle?"

"I don't even remember, it had something to do with fashion, I think. But the point is..." She stepped closer to Rarity, firm but warm. "...the lesson you learned was to be honest with your friends."

Rarity paused, frowning. "An honesty lesson."

"Yup."

For a second, it seemed like that was it, but Rarity suddenly spun around and began levitating cloths all over the place. "But this is different!! I don't trust myself to be honest right now! I'm being completely unreasonable, and who knows what I'll end up saying if I try to talk to Fluttershy about it."

"You ain't any more unreasonable than you are on any typical Tuesday," Applejack said, barely managing not to roll her eyes.

"Oh, you have no idea!" Rarity wailed. She flung herself at Applejack's feet. "Darling, I have made terrible, terrible choices in my personal life because of this. Humiliating, degrading things! I'm completely out of control!"

"Uh." Applejack carefully paused before speaking. "If you're in trouble, I'm gonna have to put my hoof down and insist you tell me about it."

"Oh, darling, if I tell you, you have to promise you won't breathe a word of this to another soul!"

Applejack grimaced. "Sugarcube, I ain't liking this. If I gotta..."

"Promise meeeeeeeeee!" Rarity squeaked pathetically.

"Agh, fine! I promise! Cross my flies and hope for cupcakes, or whatever it is!"

Rarity lay before her, embarrassment and shame on her face. She sniffled for a few moments. "I. A few nights ago." She covered her face with her hooves. "...I took Trixie home!"

Applejack did not respond. Rarity looked up, whimpering. "Well? Aren't you going to judge me?"

"Wait." Applejack blinked. "That's it? You were done?"

Rarity gawked. "Perhaps you don't understand what I mean! I'm saying I found Trixie and took her home and..."

"Gah, no, I get it! I don't need any details!" Applejack waved her hoofs around and shook her head quickly. "I just don't get what the big deal is."

"It was Trixie!" Rarity stressed, looking flabbergasted. "Trixie! And just to... to be some sort of distraction! Ohhh, how could I sink so lowwww!" Rarity flung various cloth fragments into the air and they fell down, draping over her like tiny blankets.

Applejack took a deep breath. "Sugarcube, I'm gonna need you to do me a favor," she declared. "Wait for me while I head into the kitchen for a minute. I have to... uh. Do. Something."

Rarity only weakly mumbled a response, and Applejack took that as confirmation. She turned and walked quickly into the kitchen, frantically looking for the nearest electric appliance. She found a coffee grinder and switched it on; as soon as the whirring filled the room, she let out the laughter she had been holding in.

When it was out of her system, she switched the grinder off and went back into the other room. Rarity was glaring at her.

"Aw, shucks," Applejack muttered. "You heard me, huh?"

"I can't believe you!" Rarity snapped. "I know I'd be a laughingstock if anypony knew. But to be laughed at by one of my dearest friends..."

"Rarity, wait, hold on! I ain't laughing because of what you did, I was laughing because you made me think it was some nightmare and then it just turned out to be... this."

"Oh, don't try to spare my feelings!" Rarity moaned.

Applejack did roll her eyes that time. "Sugarcube, if I was trying to spare your feelings, I wouldn't tell you that you're being a total dumbbell right now."

Rarity gasped. "A... dumbbell?"

"A dumbbell!" Applejack confirmed. "No one cares if you hooked up with Trixie. She's... well, I wouldn't call her a good pony, but she ain't a bad one, either. She ain't the type to string you along or tell you a bunch of lies, so the whole thing seems fine to me."

Rarity covered up her face with her hooves again. "...it was really great," she whimpered.

"Nope, stop right there, just 'cause I approve don't mean I wanna hear about it." She blinked, then leaned closer. "Hold on. Is this gonna turn serious between you and her?"

"Ack, no!" Rarity spasmed randomly in her denial. "No, no! Definitely not!"

"Ehh." Applejack shrugged. "Well, that's good. Not 'cause she's so awful, but just 'cause I dunno you want to be a part of whatever she and Starlight got going on."

Without getting up, Rarity unrolled a mauve cloth from the corner and spread it over her own head. "I'm so humiliated," she groaned.

Applejack lifted up the cloth and looked Rarity right in the quivering, tear-filled eyes. "Sugarcube, you're worrying me. What's got you all in a stitch about this? You ain't never been so ashamed of stuff like this." She paused. "Even when maybe you should be."

Rarity groaned.

"I'm talking about Trenderhoof."

Rarity groaned louder.

"Naw, come on." Applejack pulled Rarity to her feet. "What's the problem? This ain't just about Fluttershy."

Rarity stared down at the floor for a moment. "I suppose I just thought I'd have grown past all this by now." She sighed, dropping to a seated position. "I am ashamed of Trenderhoof, and that's the problem. My whole life, one after another, I've been drawn to... to vain, flashy unicorns with excellent manes. I'm just doing it all over again."

Applejack nodded. "I hear ya, but don't beat yourself up. Trixie's silly, and she's kinda annoying, but she ain't in the same universe as Trenderhoof. You are growing."

Rarity managed a small, wavering smile, but she did not have a chance to say anything before a series of thumps was heard from the next room and a muffled voice called, "Yo, Rarity! You know where Applejack is?"

Rarity blinked in surprise. "Rainbow Dash?"

Applejack sighed. "Want me to go see what she wants?"

"Please." Rarity took a deep breath, nodding gratefully. "I'll tidy up and join you in a moment if I can pull myself together." She picked up one of the fallen spools of thread, a wavering smile on her face.

Applejack turned to walk into the next room, only half surprised to see Rainbow sticking her head through the open front door. "Oh! There you are." She glanced over her shoulder. "She's in here!"

"Oh!" Starlight Glimmer's head poked through the doorway, too. "Hi!"

"Howdy, sugarcube!" Applejack headed out the front door and closed it behind her, leaving Rarity some privacy. "Rarity's a mite busy, but you wanted to talk to me anyways, right?"

"Yeah!" Starlight answered. "I wanted to see if you could do me a huge favor. Seeeeee... you know how Manehattan Pride is coming up next weekend?"

Applejack felt her forehead creasing just a bit. "Can't say's I did."

"Huh?" Starlight asked, confused. "But aren't you..." Rainbow elbowed her, discreetly shaking her head no.

"What I am is private about stuff like that," Applejack said evenly. "What's the favor?"

"Um, well." Starlight looked back and forth between them, clearly trying to keep from getting completely derailed. "Okay so, remember Ocellus? From the Friendship School?"

Hearing that name relaxed Applejack. "Sure. Real good kid."

"Yeah, she is! Um, so she really wants to come to pride, and we think it'd be good for her! We have permission from her parents and Thorax, but we just need somepony to be her chaperone who isn't... uh." Starlight coughed lightly. "...also going for more recreational reasons."

Applejack raised an eyebrow.

Starlight shrank a bit, but only a bit. "It's our vacation," she defended. "Come on, I work hard at the school all year, and I've really been looking forward to this. But I want to help Ocellus too, if I can. I'd be able to get you a modest stipend from the school."

Applejack sighed. "Naw, you're fine. But shucks, I can't help you. We got the whole irrigation set-up for the north fields getting replaced next week. I won't have a minute to spare, much less the whole weekend." At Starlight's forlorn expression, she nodded over to the other pony nearby. "But hey, can't Rainbow do it?"

"No way, don't even look at me," Rainbow snapped. "The last time I went to a pride thing, I couldn't go five seconds without a pony coming up to me and trying to get me to do a sonic rainboom."

"Heh, I thought you'd like that sorta thing," Applejack remarked. "You're famous."

"Well yeah, obviously, but I can't..." Rainbow Dash sighed. "Look, I can't help having an awesome rainbow mane, and I can't help doing awesome rainbow sky tricks. Somepony sees 'em and feels better about themselves, great, but they're my thing, and I gotta keep 'em for me. If I go, I'll just feel like a total jerk the whole time."

Starlight nodded sadly. "Yeah... so. Neither of you can do it. Me, Trixie, Fluttershy, and Rarity can't do it, because we're all going for vacations. Sunburst can’t do it because he’s overseeing the school field renovations. So. I guess that only leaves..."

Applejack leaned forward. "....it leaves...?"

Starlight glanced around. "Huh. I was kind of expecting her to appear out of nowhere and interrupt me. It only leaves Pinkie P--"

"STARLIGHT!!!!" Pinkie screeched, appearing from nowhere and tackling the unicorn to the ground. "I'd get to go to Manehattan and also help Ocellus find herself and see a bunch of awesome flags and receive a modest stipend?!?! This is amazing!!"

"Ghhk," Starlight replied.

"Ehehehe." Pinkie hopped away from her friend, reaching out a hoof and pulling her upright. "Sorry..."

"No, it's..." Starlight took a deep breath, rubbing her chest. "Whoof. Uh. It's fine. I'm just glad you're available."

"I'm posilutely available! You can focus on enjoying your trip."

"This means a lot to me. You..."

"Although..." Pinkie scratched her head in confusion. "I dunno why you want to go out to clubs, anyway! If you wanna date somepony, why don't you just date Trixie?"

Applejack actually considered that a pretty good question, but Starlight sputtered in horror. "What?! No, I couldn't do that! That's not... no! She... and I... no!"

"Wellll, okay!" Pinkie replied, completely unfazed by Starlight's fazedness. "Date Sunburst, then!"

"Pinkie!!" Starlight waved her hooves around frantically. "No! I don't even like him like that!"

"Hmmm. Okay!" Pinkie remained completely cheerful. "Date Trixie, then!"

"Waaaugh!" Starlight screeched, jumping up and down in her consternation. "Trixie and I are..." She shook her head violently as if trying to fling the blush off her face. "Auug!"

"You really saying you don't want to?" Rainbow asked. "The whole thing's seemed pretty inevitable for a while."

"No!" Starlight moaned. "That doesn't... we're close, but... look, friends can't just start dating!"

The others glanced at one another. "Uhhmmm... why not?" Rainbow asked.

"It's got to break some kind of rule! If friends can start dating, then nothing means anything! The ground is the sky! Fire is trees!"

"Ohh, lord," Applejack mumbled.

"Hey, I'm the headmare of the school of friendship. Maybe I'll just make it a rule!"

"Noo!" Pinkie wailed. "If friends can't date friends, then Gummy will never get together with Penelope!"

"Wait." Rainbow squinted in confusion. "Who's Penelope?"

"Uh, Gummy's friend, duh."

"Sugarcube, I'm sure we're all real sorry if we were pressuring you to date Trixie and you don't want to," Applejack said evenly, stepping right up to Starlight. "Friends can date each other, but it ain't true that romances can be 'inevitable' or anything like that."

In the exact instant she finished saying that, Rarity's front door slammed open and a disheveled, white unicorn ran out, beaming. "It's fate! Fated love! Fated true love!"

Applejack gawked at her. "...What? What're you..."

"I was just cleaning up my studio!" Rarity sang, dancing from hoof to hoof. "I was moping and feeling terribly sorry for myself, and I was thinking about how Applejack was right when she was pointing out my tragic, hopeless patterns with relationships."

"Uh, that's not exactly what I..."

"And then I looked down and saw this!!" Rarity levitated up a spool of thread, glistening with every color of the rainbow. There was a pause.

"Rarity?" Applejack glanced around for help; finding none, she threw up her hooves helplessly. "This ain't communicating much."

"Awesome thread, though," Rainbow added.

"Coco!" Rarity yelled joyfully, obviously thinking this explained everything.

"...Coco?" Applejack asked.

"Coco!"

"Wait, Coco?" Starlight asked.

"Coco?" Rainbow said.

"Coco!"

"Eehee!" Pinkie cheered. "Coco! Cococococococo. Cocococo! This is fun! Coc--" Rainbow's hooves mercifully clamped her hooves down around Pinkie's mouth.

"Rarity." Applejack held both front hooves up in a calming motion. "Please, just start over, would you? What are you talking about?"

"Coco!" Rarity answered again, but then she finally clarified: "Miss. Pommel."

"Ohh!" Applejack frowned. "...What about Miss Pommel?"

"Well, think about it, darling!" Rarity swooned. "Sweet little Coco is the antidote to every toxic habit in my dating life so far! I've always focused on these cold brutes, looking down from what I've seen as a higher station than myself. But Miss Pommel is my equal... and when I met her, she was merely an assistant! She is a sweetheart, and a mare, and my dear friend!"

"What does any of this have to do with your cool thread?" Rainbow asked.

"Well, that's the fated part! This thread was a gift she gave me, when we first met! I saw it, tiny and adorable there on the cold, wooden floor, and I thought of her. And remember where she lives! In Manehattan!! The very place I'm already planning to visit in less than a week! It's truly fate!"

"Could someone please tell me who this pony is?" Starlight broke in.

"She's a fabulously talented designer," Rarity answered. "My closest colleague in Manehattan! We were going to work together, if not for an unfortunately timed illness."

"Hmm. I think I have heard that name before..." Starlight frowned, then held up a hoof in sudden realization. "Oh! She's the one whose work you showed me in that magazine, right? The... um. I don't want to say 'hedgehog dress,' but it was a dress that looked like a hedgehog costume and I'm not sure what else to call it."

"Miss Pommel's work is very cerebral and nouveau!" Rarity enthused. "Why, she's one of the most exciting designers to come along in years!"

"She is very sweet," Applejack admitted. "In fact, she's a darn fine pony, if you ask me. But this is still coming out of nowhere, ain't it?"

"Oh, but it's perfect!" Rarity gushed. "Think about who I am deep down, darling. I'm an artist!... but I worry the pressures of business will stifle my creativity. Who could better understand than someone who goes through the same thing?"

"Well, but..."

"And you, yourself have often observed that although I have a craving for the excitement and culture in the city, I am a small-town mare at heart. Coco has always lived in the city... but she has dedicated herself to fostering community within her neighborhood!"

"Um..."

"And all of my dearest friends already know her and approve of her! And she's so honest with her feelings, but our schedules will force us to also maintain a healthy distance. It's simply perfect!"

Applejack gently grabbed Rarity's shoulders, holding steady. "Whoa now, sugarcube. I ain't arguing with you, it's just you're letting yourself get all carried away. You got to stop and think about a few things."

Rarity gasped, seeming almost appalled. "Like what?!"

"Like is she even gay?" Rainbow asked.

"Oh! Well." Rarity stuck her snoot up in the air. "A lady does not engage in gossip!" Her expression quickly shifted to a sly smile. "But yes."

"That's good, but it ain't the biggest thing!" Applejack argued. "You've known her a couple of years now and I never heard you talk about her like this. Do you even have any feelings for her, or does it all just seem like it should work?"

Rarity gasped again, clearly well past being appalled. "Applejack! Fated love!" Applejack just looked, and Rarity slowly calmed down just a bit. "I know I can get swept away, but I've also learned so much about myself in the past year! I'm not the starry-eyed mare who pined over Prince Blueblood, despite what I was saying earlier about having taken Trixie home."

Starlight held up a hoof. "Whoa, wait, what?"

"Well. All right." Applejack narrowed her eyes very slightly. "But just be careful, okay? Miss Pommel is my friend, too."

"I mean it's totally not my business," Starlight yammered as Rarity smiled gratefully. "I don't even--WAUGH!"

Applejack whirled around at Starlight's yelp of surprise, and she found herself face-to-face with what appeared to be a giant hedgehog. Upon closer examination, the hedgehog was actually Pinkie Pie wearing an extremely impractical dress.

"It's a comment on how clothes are walls we put up, or something!" the hedgehog exclaimed happily. "Rarity explained it when I bought it. But I just had to have it because come on it's a classy hedgehog costume I mean right?!"

"Two new rules," Starlight asserted shakily. "Friends can't date, and nopony is allowed to quick-change into Coco Pommel outfits."

"This is amazing," Moon Dancer marveled, sifting through Ocellus's suitcase. "I haven't even heard of some of these books. Do you even know how rare it is for me never to have heard of a book?"

Ocellus smile-cringed, half proud and half shy. "I stopped at a bunch of libraries and bookstores on the way here. I know Miss Pinkie Pie said this weekend is about learning things that aren't in books, but that's no reason not to do some studying, right?"

Moon Dancer stared at her. "Take my class so I can give you an A."

"Oh wow!" Sunburst enthused, leaning in behind Moon Dancer and grabbing one of the many books with his magic. "I didn't know Null Set wrote about gender! I only know him for his work on magic physiogeny!"

"He got into it late in his career," Moon Dancer remarked. "I wouldn't call this stuff bad, but there's not much novel about it. Although he did directly influence Goodie Gumdrops, who basically invented Magic Queer Theory, so..."

"That makes a lot of sense! I know they were both teaching at Oxcart at the same time."

"Aahahaha!" A voice laughed fakely. They looked over to see Starlight walking stiffly onto the train platform, levitating her own suitcase with her. "It's a really good thing I'm not insecure about any of my friends being really similar to my childhood friend Sunburst!"

"It's a really good thing you say that literally every time Sunburst and I are in a room together," Moon Dancer replied, rolling her eyes.

Starlight grinned, but paused when she noticed the changeling. "Um. See, Ocellus, sometimes, when creatures have bad habits, they artificially make a big deal about it to turn it into a joke? That helps reduce the tension and acknowledge..."

"Heyyy, Starlight!" Sunburst interrupted. "Maybe this is a good time to remind Ocellus about how, even though you're her headmare most of the year, you don't actually have any educational responsibilities for her during this trip?"

"Oh! Yes. Right." Starlight coughed, then very softly muttered, "...and acknowledge shared awareness of the situation."

"Yes," Ocellus said, thankfully just moving forward. "Miss Pinkie told me she was the one I was going to stay with."

"Yup!" Pinkie confirmed cheerfully, bouncing up out of nowhere. "Everypony else is going to have fun. We're going to have fun too, but it's a different kind of fun: it's educational fun." She leaned closer. "And room service fun. Room service fun is very high-quality fun."

"I understand," Ocellus said, giggling softly.

"This means you stick with Pinkie the whole trip, and do everything she says," Sunburst added. "You've never been to Manehattan before, right?" At Ocellus's head-shake, he frowned. "It can be a little overwhelming at first, but that's why we're being so careful."

"Mm-hmm!" Pinkie confirmed. "I haaaaate being all tough and rule-y, but I made a promise to your parents I'd look out for you!"

"Oh, I won't break any rules!" Ocellus said, looking appalled by the very notion. "I just really appreciate being able to go."

"We're glad you can come," Starlight said. "Oh, and just because we're not your teachers, that doesn’t mean we’re not here to help if you get separated from Pinkie or something. If it's about your safety, you can come to me or anyone else you know; it's the most important thing."

"Oh, that reminds me." Sunburst pulled out a small, glowing pyramid and passed it over to Ocellus. "If there's a really big emergency, you can use this. Just poke it with your horn, and it'll send out a call to me, Thorax, and Princess Twilight."

"But I'm sure that won't be necessary!" Starlight said quickly.

"Eehhhyyyess?" Sunburst agreed, looking surprised by her outburst. "I'm sure it won't be necessary."

Ocellus set the pyramid among the books in her suitcase and grinned up at the ponies around her. "Before the train gets here, can I ask about some of the books I've been reading?"

"Yes," Moon Dancer answered. "No," Pinkie answered at exactly the same moment.

"Uh..."

"This weekend isn't about studying!" Pinkie insisted.

"Well, okay, but actually everything's about studying," Moon Dancer said.

Sunburst was slightly grateful when he felt himself getting pulled away from the argument, Starlight's characteristic blob of magic leading him to an empty part of the platform. "Is everything okay?" he asked.

Starlight glanced around, then looked at him seriously. "A magic pyramid?"

"Well...yeah. It's a good idea, right? She probably won't need it, but..."

"Thorax and Twilight?!"

"Just in case there's a disaster or something." He glowered slightly. "And I stayed up all night getting the enchantment right."

"There won't be a disaster." Starlight looked around, eyes falling on Trixie, standing alone next to the ticket office. "Trixie! Help me explain this to Sunburst!"

Trixie just looked at them for a second, then she slowly made her way over.

"Gnnnaugh, but I don't care about the morphological hegemonies in linguistipoopy doodle!" Pinkie's voice said loudly.

"Yes, Starlight?" Trixie asked when she arrived.

"Sunburst thinks there's going to be some big disaster in Manehattan."

"Oh come on. No I don't. I just think we should be prepared if there is one!"

Trixie looked back and forth between them. "Well, whatever Starlight says," she grunted. "She's the boss."

“Pinkie!!” Moon Dancer sounded horrified. “Stop juggling those! One of them went out of print five years ago!”

There was a pause as Sunburst tried to think of what to say to Trixie and Starlight just stood there, looking surprised. "Are...you okay?" Sunburst finally managed.

"Yep."

"Are you sure? You don't really sound okay."

"I'm okay."

"Trixie," Starlight grunted, annoyed. "Are you still mad about me bringing Ocellus?” Trixie said nothing. “We talked about that. I did it because I got too excited, not because I don't trust you. And I'm working on being less impulsive when I'm excited. I really am sorry."

Trixie stared stonily, then sighed. "We're fine. I'm just annoyed about being up so early in the dumb morning." She did not smile, but Sunburst recognized the expression as a benign one on her. She nodded over to the other group. “What’s going on with them?”

Sunburst glanced over, only slightly surprised to see Pinkie jumping back and forth as up-tempo polka music played from nowhere. “...and you can’t learn that from reaaaaading!” she crescendoed.

“Oh, huh, it turned into a song.” Sunburst walked over as Pinkie made her final pose and the music stopped. Moon Dancer looked annoyed, but Fluttershy had come over and was calmingly patting her back.

Ocellus just seemed amused by Pinkie’s antics. “Yay, that was fun!” But she shyly held up a hoof. “Um, I think I’m still going to read some of these on the train, though.”

“Awww.” Pinkie did not sound very disappointed. “Oh well, at least I got a chance to juggle.”

Sunburst glanced back at his colleagues; Trixie still seemed a little sour, but they stood close, nothing but comfortable vibes between them. He felt a little better.

"I'm telling you," Starlight insisted, "this is a good idea. A great idea, even!"

The other three ponies in the sleeping car glanced at one another skeptically. "See, it's not that I disagree with you necessarily," Moon Dancer began diplomatically, "I just want to be careful."

"But we'll arrive at Manehattan soon!" Starlight protested. "And this isn't even something to worry about, anyway! It's not a big deal, and it is useful. Twilight isn't afraid of ladybugs anymore, right?"

"Um, yesssss," Pinkie said, "buuuuuut she did scream at a kite for five hours."

"That was just because you barged in on us!" Starlight sighed. "I don't get it, Moon Dancer, you were okay with this last week."

"That," Pinkie replied icily, "was before she heard about a particular cake-burning incident." She held the glare for a moment, then blinked. "I mean... I totally forgive you! But we just have to make sure nothing as horrible as a burnt cake happens again!"

Starlight sighed. "But hypnotism isn't like a mind-control spell! It's just suggestions. The whole reason I thought of using it is because it's not a big thing! It'd just be a small boost to help me out."

Moon Dancer sighed. "Yeah... that's what my research said too, when I looked into it. And I did get a chance to practice before we left... uh, but it was on Maud so I kind of have no clue if it even worked or not."

"So? Come on! You get to practice something new you learned in a book, I get a self-esteem boost. It's a great idea!"

Moon Dancer raised an eyebrow. "Yeaahhh. So, I've been keeping track. Four of the last ten disasters at the school started with you insisting something is a good idea."

"What?? That can't be true."

Moon Dancer responded by pulling a list out of her saddlebag. "I did some interviews, so I have verbatim quotes. Okay, there's 'Trust me, it's a good idea! None of the students will even notice if Discord is living in the auditorium!"

"Hey, he needed somewhere to stay!" Starlight argued. "And he didn't cause that much trouble. Fluttershy, back me up, here!"

Fluttershy drew back a bit and hesitantly smiled. "I guess... he wasn't completely lying about the chaos dimension being closed for repairs. Just... mostly lying. And it isn't entirely his fault Yona got shaved..."

"Half-shaved!" Starlight protested, beginning to feel relieved Ocellus and Rarity were off in the dining car, and very relieved Trixie was sleeping next door.

Moon Dancer gave her a dry look, then glanced back down at her list. "'It's a great idea! What could make students more honest with one another than allowing them to anonymously say whatever they want with no repercussions?'"

"Ahh. Um." Starlight scratched the back of her head. "That only lasted a day, and everycreature really did learn a good lesson at the end of it!"

"'No, it's a great idea! How much damage could two Pinkie Pies cause, anyway?'"

"Ehehehe..." Starlight grinned nervously. "Okay yes, that one was pretty bad." Pinkie herself did not look bothered, but that made sense because she wasn't even either of the Pinkie Pies in question. "Uh..."

"'This could be the best idea I've ever had! Who even needs janitors when you have one of the best magic-users in all of Equestria as headma...'"

"Okay! Yes, okay." Starlight glowered. "I should have given the janitors their raise and not transformed all of the students' hooves into sponges. Yes." She stomped her hoof. "But this isn't fair! I have a lot of ideas, and most of them actually are good!"

Moon Dancer shrugged, slipping the list back into her bag. "Yeah, you're right. All the rest of the time you said something was a great idea... and believe me, you say it a lot... it ended up being really good. I'm just pointing out it's not a sure thing."

"So..."

"Look. Starlight." Moon Dancer held up a hoof. "I'm not saying I won't do it; I just want to be careful. Hypnosis seems like the kind of thing that can easily cause... shenanigans. And I want this weekend to be as shenanigan-free as possible."

"Oh, this is ridiculous," Starlight grunted. "I wrote down exactly what I want you to say to me! If you're worried, you can just look it over and make sure it's safe."

"I did, and it looks fine," Moon Dancer said, eyes firm. "But let's say we do it. Everything's going great, but, uh oh, what's this? Pinkie's in the room and she's paying a little too much attention. So whoops, now Pinkie wakes up and thinks she's you."

Starlight rolled her eyes. "I really don't..."

"But she's an earth pony, and Starlight Glimmer without her magic doesn't make any sense. So, she goes about constructing an artificial horn out of items she finds at the hotel. And she could do it, Starlight! You know she could!"

"This..."

"...And she starts casting spells to try to change herself back into you, but it's influenced by her innate Pinkiness and the spell goes wrong, and you know what happens then?!"

"Moon Dancer. Listen..."

"Talking jellybeans, Starlight!" Moon Dancer snapped. "Talking jellybeans everywhere! Talking jellybeans that now need jobs, and kersplash goes the economy of Manehattan!"

Starlight stared at Moon Dancer for a moment through half-lidded eyes. "Are you done?"

"With that scenario!" Moon Dancer had worked herself into a bit of a frenzy, but Fluttershy softly patted her back, which seemed to be helping. "But that's just one of many!"

"Okay." Starlight was trying to not get too annoyed, but it was a bit difficult. "So how about Pinkie just not be in the sleeping car with us while you hypnotize me?"

"Aww," Pinkie mumbled. "I wanted to see Starlight yell at kites."

"You've seen me yell at kites before," Starlight pointed out. "Just... out of passion for the art form."

"That's a start..." Moon Dancer said. She glanced at her special somepony hesitantly. "Honey, I think you shouldn't be around, either. No offense, but you can be kind of... suggestible."

Fluttershy nodded. "One time, I thought I was goth," she agreed.

"See?" Starlight said. "It'll just be us. Everything will be great!"

Moon Dancer squinted at her. "Well. I guess so. But I'm sticking completely to the script you gave me! No room for weirdness!"

"That's fine," Starlight replied, relieved. "But can we go ahead and do it already? I want to definitely be done before we get to Manehattan."

With a sigh, Moon Dancer nodded. Fluttershy gave her a quick smooch, and she and Pinkie stepped out of the car after both wishing Moon Dancer good luck. Starlight tried to ignore how vaguely ominous that felt.

"Okay," Moon Dancer said, "have a seat and let's get started."

Starlight complied as Moon Dancer, with slight apprehension pulled her pocket watch out of her saddlebag. "Hey," Starlight said, "you know, you don't have to do this if you really don't want to."

Moon Dancer shook her head. "No, I'm probably being silly. I just... want this weekend to be smooth, you know?"

"It will be!" Starlight promised. "And... listen, I appreciate this. I really, really want to meet some. Um. Mares. But I get in my own head about it so easily, and that makes me scared. This will be a huge help."

Moon Dancer nodded, smiling softly. "I get it. I hope it works." They shared a small moment of connection before Moon Dancer refocused. "Okay, just relax and follow along, all right?" She levitated the pocket watch up in front of her friend's eyes and began to gently swing it back and forth.

A vague part of Starlight's mind realized how quickly and easily this was working on her, but that was easy to disregard as she listened to Moon Dancer's droning voice and watched the timepiece. In no time at all, her eyes were closed and then she opened them again and all she remembered in-between was floating. "Uh."

"Feeling okay?" Moon Dancer asked as she put the pocket watch away.

"Yeah." She stretched. "Just kinda... dazed. Did it work?"

"I think so. You showed all the signs from the book."

"Mmm." Starlight shook her hooves; it felt like she hadn't moved for days. "You followed the script?"

"Yep." Moon Dancer passed over instructions she'd been given. "Basic confidence builders, and then that specific one: When you first go into a nightclub, you'll find it easy and effortless to approach the mare you think is most attractive and who looks like she'd be open to talking and introducing yourself."

"Thank you!"

"Although I don't even know why you're working so hard at this," Moon Dancer remarked, fixing her saddlebag. "Can't Trixie just take the lead?"

"Um... what?"

"She's such an extrovert! Just have her pick up the mares for the, um. Activities the two of you have planned."

"Gah!" Starlight gaped, horror filling her veins. "No! I want to pick up mares... for myself! Not WITH Trixie!"

"Oh!" Moon Dancer blinked in confusion. "So, wait, you two are... open, or something?"

"No! We're not dating at all! Why would you think that?!"

"...now that you specifically mention it, I'm kind of not sure. I just felt like it was something that must have happened." She frowned. "Huh. Sorry, I didn't even realize I was making a weird assumption. You and Trixie. It just felt... obvious."

"Well, it's not!" Starlight snapped, hoping her blush was not too apparent. "I..."

"Ohhhh." Moon Dancer suddenly paused and then nodded. "You're dating Sunburst!"

"Gah! No, I don't even like him like that! Does everypony think I'm dating one of them?!"

"I mean. Or both?" Starlight grabbed her head in consternation, but Moon Dancer stepped closer. "It's not like I think about it a lot! I just made a dumb assumption; I'm sorry."

"Hmph." Starlight took a deep breath, calming a little. "I'm sorry I freaked out. It's just... I couldn't date Trixie; come on. That's impossible."

"Eh, you're missing out, then," Moon Dancer replied, shrugging. "Trixie's a knockout. And if I was into stallions, I'd be head-over-hooves for Sunburst... uh, though that may be egotistical to say. Apparently we have a lot in common."

Starlight glared. "I'm gonna go find Fluttershy and bark like a dog in front of her and convince her you accidentally hypnotized me into it."

"Nooo!" Moon Dancer grabbed Starlight, but she was laughing, too. "I can't let anypony think all my studying backfired! Pinkie would never let me forget it!"

They both giggled, and Starlight felt better. "I guess creatures are going to make assumptions like that if I never talk with anyone about this stuff," she admitted. "That's part of what I'm trying to fix by throwing myself out there, this weekend. Everything will be so confusing and weird, I won't have any choice but to ask for advice."

"That is a very Starlight Glimmer way of solving a problem."

"Heh. I guess so." Starlight suddenly realized that the window behind Moon Dancer wasn't showing fields and trees anymore. "Oh! We're already in the city!"

Moon Dancer looked out at the right angles and hard stone of the Manehattan buildings whooshing past them. "Well! Time for the weekend to really start, I guess. You ready?"

"Absolutely not!"

"Me neither!"

They hoofbumped, and with genuine grins, they headed off to join the rest of their friends.

Brain Femme

"It's called Self-Compassion and Emotion Regulation in Friendships,” Moon Dancer said, embarrassed to even be talking about it. “Um, but even though it has 'compassion' in the title, it's actually in the Laughter department, I know it's confusing, sorry."

"Oh, wow." Ocellus grinned thoughtfully. "Is it a full credit, or a half credit? Is it discussion-based or lecture-based?"

"Full credit. And... I'm not really sure, I've only taught it once. I want to focus on research methods, though, because that's kind of my thing. There's a big, final project where you read some of Net Gross's papers and then come up with your own study." Moon Dancer scratched the back of her head nervously. "To be honest, I try to minimize my own 'teaching,' because I get worried I'll pass on some misinformation. This isn't my main job. Um, but Starlight was really insistent I have something to offer students, so..."

"Oh, I understand!" Ocellus said passionately. "I get worried about that, too! That's why I have this!" She held up her tape recorder. "I've got to report back to everyone after I get home, and I'm worried I'll get something wrong." She paused. "Wait, one second, just while I'm thinking of it." She clicked the tape recorder on. "Thursday morning. Arrived safely at the hotel. The city is a terrifying, angry monument to the destruction of nature. So many ponies; so much rage. Mind cluttered. Nerves frayed." She clicked it off, then clicked it back on. "The lobby has a Starbucks, though, so frappuccinos! Yay!" She clicked it off.

Moon Dancer was thankfully spared having to respond to that, because Pinkie approached with two keycards in her mouth. "Beez ur yrss!" she said, holding them out. Moon Dancer took the cards with her magic, nodding in thanks. "Your room’s on seventeen, with everyone else’s. But..." she turned to Ocellus excitedly, "We're on the second floor! Which meaaannnnssss we get a big suite, with a hot tub and everything!"

“Oh, that’s nice!” Ocellus replied, smiling. “Thanks so much, Miss Pinkie.”

Pinkie beamed in response, but then immediately frowned again. “You two were talking about school. Which is fine, but come on! We’re in Manehattan! Let’s find something fun to do while Rarity and Fluttershy are gone!”

“Well… all right,” Moon Dancer said. “Equestria’s largest used bookstore is just a few blocks away. Maybe we…” She trailed off as Pinkie’s expression dissolved into a look of pure despair.

“Uh.” Moon Dancer thought for a moment. “We could go to the geological museum? They have…” Pinkie’s expression stayed despair but somehow grew larger.

Moon Dancer shook her head, unable to keep a laugh from escaping. “Okay, well, We could go to F.A.O. Horse. You know, the famous toy store. That might…”

Pinkie literally pounced on her in glee. Somehow, Moon Dancer didn’t mind.

“Oh, you didn’t have to come all the way to Bronclyn!” Coco apologized, leading Fluttershy and Rarity into the studio. “Especially if you’re just stopping by…”

“Not at all, darling! Of course we had to come, and I’m delighted to see behind the curtain, as it were!” Rarity trotted right in, but Fluttershy paused for a moment to steel herself.

It was very nice to see sweet little Coco again, and supporting Rarity was still the main priority. But as Fluttershy stepped inside, she could not keep from being distracted by the truly grotesque clothes hanging all over. One outfit appeared to be a giant piece of coral covered in hair, another looked like Sassy Saddles's usual garb, except instead of a saddle, there were skulls. In the very center of the room, there was a pink dress decorated with what hopefully were not real eyeballs.

"Um, these are just some works in progress," Coco explained meekly.

"Oh, how daring!" Rarity exclaimed. "I just knew you'd be a success, but to have so completely developed such an inimitable style is incredible!"

"I... like the ones without the skulls," Fluttershy managed to stammer.

"They're supposed to be challenging, but I don't think I have the balance right, yet." Coco sighed. "I know my vision is a little weird..."

"Oh, don't you dare apologize for your work!" Rarity snapped kindly. "You've become the face of the avant-garde for a reason!"

"I'd... um... like to talk more about some of the things I'm working on, if you get a chance," Coco said shyly. "Your perspective is always so useful. I know you said you were just dropping by, but hopefully you could maybe spare a lunch later? I don't know why you're in town, though, I'm sure you're really busy..."

"But my darling!" Rarity enthused, very subtly batting her eyelashes, "You’re part of the reason I'm in town!"

"I... am?"

"You see, since we've last seen one another, I've discovered some important things about myself." Fluttershy could not help but be impressed. Rarity was being so subtle, just a wink here and a gesture there, and Miss Pommel was just utterly enthralled. "And so I've come here to enjoy the pride celebration!"

Coco's mouth fell open, but she recovered quickly. "Oh! P...pride? So... you're...?"

"As bisexual as half a gumball machine, my dear. And, since you're my dearest friend in all of Manehattan, I was hoping you could enjoy this celebration with me. I mean..." She glanced at Fluttershy briefly. "With us. Excuse my slip of the tongue."

Coco did not reply for a moment, but when she did, it was a little manic. "I don't know much. I don't normally... I went to some events last year, but... I mean, I am queer! That's what my work is mostly about!" Fluttershy tried not to think about what the bodice with the giant beetle legs over in the corner could possibly be representing about Miss Pommel's sexuality. "But..."

"Oh, please say you'll come!" Rarity pouted. "I was so looking forward to spending this time with you, specifically!" Coco, apparently unable to form words, nodded. Rarity beamed. "How wonderful! We have to return to the hotel to freshen up, but this evening, we had some things in mind we'd like to do. Perhaps you could join us? The Mareiott in Tribucka at 6:30?"

"Sure! Yes." Coco paused. "Yes to I'll meet you. Is what I'm saying. Then. And there. This is a yes to your question. The question about..."

"Delightful!" Rarity sang, finally interrupting to put the stammering mare out of her misery. She trotted over and nuzzled Coco briefly. "So sorry to rush off, but I want to look as stunning as possible tonight! You understand, don't you?"

Coco did not look like she understood much of anything at the moment. "It was very nice to see you again," Fluttershy offered. Coco blinked at her, saying nothing. Rarity cheerfully turned and trotted back out the way they came, Fluttershy following behind.

When they got back out onto the Bronclyn street, Rarity suddenly stopped, took a deep breath, and whirled on Fluttershy. "That went well, right?" she asked, her eyes displaying anxiety that had apparently been skillfully hidden before. "She wanted to go? That's a good sign?"

"Um, yes," Fluttershy answered. "Actually, she might really... really like you."

"Oh, I don't dare to hope!" Rarity moaned, nearly swooning. "Well. Perhaps I will dare to hope just a little."

"I think you should."

"Eeeee!" Rarity excitedly trotted in place. "My heart is beating like a jackhammer! I really do like her.” She paused, as if surprised she’d just said that. “...I really do like her."

"Rarity." Fluttershy forced herself to stand directly in front of her friend, keeping her expression as serious as possible. "I want you to know that I like Miss Pommel, and I hope the two of you are able to be together. But."

Rarity gazed back, confused. "But?"

"But..." Fluttershy sank back, but just a little. "But her designs are absolutely terrifying, and if you become her girlfriend, please please please keep her from ever dressing me in them."

"Ah. I think... I can handle that."

Fluttershy smiled warmly in gratitude.

Coco walked across the room, even though there was nothing there. "She said 'I was looking forward to spending the time with you specifically.'" She walked back across to the other side of the room, even though there was nothing there, either. "'With you, specifically!' That means something, right?!"

Her friend did not reply. Unbothered, Coco turned in an anxious circle. "But she also called me her 'dearest friend in Manehattan.' She said 'friend!' I just don't know!" She waved her hooves around in half frustration and half panic. "I'm sorry I just came over and barged in, but I didn't know who else to ask! You know her. What do you think? Is it a date?"

Before even one second passed, she spoke again. "Wait. Before you answer, just remember, this is Rarity. Rarity! The kindest and most beautiful mare in the whole industry! The one who saved me from turning out like Suri! The one who showed up like a miracle to save me when I needed her most!"

Still not waiting for an answer, she paced back across the room. "It took all the courage I had just to give her that rainbow thread! Do you think she figured out what I was trying to say? I can't believe she's actually queer!" She grabbed her head between her forehooves. "Aauughh! Could it even possibly be a date? Am I being stupid? What do you think?!" She gazed in desperate hope at her friend.

"Dating is for plebes and hooligans!!" Photo Finish barked. "I know nothing about it! Nothing!"

Coco sniffled. "So... you can't help? I..."

"Why of course I, Photo Finish, will help the Coco!" She tapped one of her attendants with a hoof. He picked her up and carried her over to Coco so she could embrace her. "But I must observe with my own magical eyes! The body language will tell me all I need to know. I will be Photo Finish the spy!!"

"Really? Um. That’s great, but you’d have to be subtle about it. Could you…”

"SNEAK!" Photo Finish shouted, prancing around the room. "Sneak! Sneak! Sneak! Do you see?!!" She jumped up on a table, flinging her head back into a dignified pose. "I sneak!"

Coco stared at her, bewildered. There was a long pause. "Well, if you--"

"I SNEAK!!" Photo Finish gestured to her entourage, who immediately ran over and formed a pony staircase back down to the floor. “Simply let me know where you will be and all will be well!” She trotted happily down the stairs towards Coco, then paused. “...No.” She posed again. “All will be fantastic!!”

It took a moment, but Coco found herself smiling. “Thank you. I know I’m probably being really dumb, but…”

“Tut tut tut!” Photo Finish shouted. “We are in the business of creating dreams. Of creating beauty!!” She threw her hoof around Coco’s shoulder, spreading her other foreleg out towards the heavens. “And we must work to create beauty for each other when the time comes as well! Because friendship! Friendship is….”

Coco blinked, confused. “Um… friendship is magic?”

“Wrong!!” Photo Finish shouted. “Friendship is… the magics!!”

And despite herself, Coco felt better.

The good feelings had not entirely dissipated by the time Coco found herself trotting down the Manehattan sidewalk, but so many other feelings were swirling around in her head, it was all she could do to just be polite. They were surrounded by rainbows and cheerfulness, but the process of meeting or re-meeting so many creatures was tiring.

There was Rarity, of course, who walked right next to her but whose smile was impossible to read. Then there was Pinkie and Fluttershy, whom she remembered liking, and Starlight, who was somehow endearing and intimidating at the same time, and the smart pony in the glasses whose name she forgot, and that blue unicorn who’d decided to stay at the hotel and it was kind of a tense moment and Coco didn’t know why. They were all apparently very close friends with Rarity, and they were all completely gorgeous, and it was the sort of thing where everypony was so nice Coco felt weird about feeling weird. Honestly, the one she felt best about was the darling little Changeling,

"Wow, Starlight" Coco marveled as they all walked, trying not to be too obvious about awkwardly initiating conversation. "I'm amazed you were able to set this up!"

Starlight shrugged. "Sometimes, it's all just who you know. And, well..."

She gestured to her side, where Pinkie was in a continual state of joyful greeting. "Hi, Beeswax! Oh, hey, Cloudwhisper! Lookin' good, magic talking duck! Loved the new album, Sapphire!"

Ocellus peered around in wonder. "So many ponies..." She somehow cringed slightly while still walking. "...I'm not used to this."

“Um, I don’t like crowds too much either,” Coco said to her, receiving a grateful smile in return.

Fluttershy stepped close, nodding. "Just let us know if it becomes too much, all right?" she asked gently. "We can fly off somewhere more quiet." Coco nodded in affirmation, before realizing she didn’t have wings and so that was a silly thing to do. Thankfully, they didn’t seem to notice.

"All right. Thank you." The sidewalk was becoming less crowded as they approached the barriers partitioning off the organization area, but Ocellus seemed to be getting more tense. "Are you sure this is all right? I don't want to bother them."

"Positive!" Starlight chirped with obviously forced cheerfulness. "Aaand I'll show you right now!" She led the group right up to the security guard standing in front of the partition that divided the crowd from the special background area. "Hi! I'm Starlight Glimmer, here from the School of Friendship, and..."

The security guard stepped aside and waved them in with a nod of his head. "Hey, Pinkie," he greeted, sounding bored.

"Hi, Bottleneck! How's guard duty?"

He shrugged. "Someone's gotta do it, I guess. Committee's in the big tent, uh, as if you could miss it."

"Oh." Starlight blinked in surprise. "Well, okay then." She smiled at Ocellus. "See? No problem!"

The committee had managed to partition off half the block, with an indeed very salient, very large, brightly-colored tent apparently serving as a base of operations. Starlight led them up to the main flap; volunteers were milling around, but things didn't look too hectic.

In fact, the whole tent was weirdly shadowy and quiet, like some kind of magic darkness swirling through the periphery. It was a little eerie, despite the mundane contents that were visible: there were some card tables set up and a half-erected stage, several creatures standing on it, talking. Coco supposed she was on edge, and she tried to calm herself.

That did not last long, because of the sudden, loud squealing of the enormous sea monster whose tank sat next to the stage. "Aaa! Is that my favorite ponies?! It is! It's my favorite little ponies!!"

"Steven!" Pinkie sang in greeting, as all three members of Rarity's core group rushed over, looking completely delighted. Moon Dancer, Starlight, and Ocellus seemed quite a bit more confused, but Coco was immediately distracted by Rarity softly bumping against her side before galloping over to the tank.

"Oh, you look fabulous!" Rarity called to the sea monster. "I just love the ascot; what a delightful way to complement your famous facial hair!" She smiled back at Coco, who was trotting hesitantly to catch up. "This is our dear friend Steven Magnet! They played quite an important role in us all becoming friends!"

Steven waved their claw dismissively. "Oh, flatterer! But it's so wonderful to see all of you!" They raised a curious, mischievous eyebrow. "And who are these others? Could they be your... oh, what is the adorable term you all use... your 'special someponies?'"

Starlight froze in awkwardness and Coco froze in something like horror, but luckily Pinkie jumped to their rescue. "Just one of them! This here is Moon Dancer! She's Fluttershy's girlfriend-slash-fiancee!"

"Hi," Moon Dancer greeted. "It's less complicated than it sounds."

"Oh honey, don't you even worry," Steven assured her. "Any relationship without at least one slash in it isn't worth having!"

"And this is Starlight Glimmer!" Pinkie said, moving on quickly. "She runs the Friendship School! She set this up so Ocellus..." She darted behind the frightened changeling and pushed her forward towards Steven's tub. "...could see how this whole event works!"

Steven gasped, quickly shaking both of their hooves. "Oh, that's you! I hope we can help." They leaned down, smiling at Ocellus. "Say, could I ask you to turn into me, but with a different haircut, so I can see how I'd look? I'm kidding! I wouldn't ask you to do that!"

"Oh. Well... I could, though. If you wanted."

"Oh, I like her!" Steven sang. They glanced over at the only member of the group who had not yet been introduced. "And who's this?"

Coco swallowed, which did not at all serve to fix her dry throat and mouth. Steven was clearly entirely benevolent, but the notion of anyone explicitly clarifying her relationship to Rarity was the most monstrous thing she could imagine. "Ehh. Hello. I'm Coco Pommel."

"Coco is my very dear friend," explained Rarity. "She's attending the celebrations with me, and I'm hoping to..." She paused, either meaningfully or just searching for the right words. "...to learn a lot from her this weekend." Coco nodded, both relieved and agonized by the continued ambiguity.

"Hey. Hey, hey." A clapping noise caught all of their attention; they looked to see a griffon standing on the stage nearby, waving. He did not look pleased. "Right right, you're all Steven's best friend, but social hour's over. C'mere."

"Oh well, fine then!" Steven jokily huffed. "But make sure you speak up so I can hear from over here!"

"Yeah yeah." The griffon grumbled to himself, flying over to a table. Coco hesitantly followed the rest of the group up onto the stage, where an eclectic group of creatures was standing. Two earth ponies, a pegasus, and a unicorn… but notably a griffon and donkey, too.

She wasn't sure why she was even surprised, but amazingly Rarity and Pinkie and Fluttershy knew some of them, too. "Mr. Stripes!" Rarity greeted, approaching a large stallion in a track suit. "My goodness, I didn't know you were on the pride event committee!"

"I do for my daughter," the large earth pony replied, not without a little warmth. "I am... what is the term?... murderously protective. I can bite noses off those who'd be prejudiced, or I can volunteer here to make them less prejudiced, and eh. This is less illegal."

"Hi, Buster!" Pinkie said, trotting up to an orange colt who honestly looked far too young to even be there. "Buster's my veeerrrrrrrrry distant cousin!" she explained to the rest of the group.

Buster waved, somehow both gruff and friendly. "Hi."

"Yup uh huh very nice, I'm Gus," the griffon muttered, swooping down. He tossed a badge and lanyard to Ocellus, then flipped through a clawful of other badges, frowning. "Huh, this Starlight character isn't even here. Not sure..."

"Hey, I am here!" Starlight shouted, stomping forward. "I just am not personal friends with apparently everyone in Equestria."

"You're my personal friend!" Steven called.

"Yep sure," Gus grumbled. He tossed a badge to Starlight, then passed the rest to the others in the group. "Look, sorry I can't be friendlier, but our opening event is in like ninety minutes and we are extremely not ready."

"Oh, no!" Ocellus exclaimed. "I'm sorry! I don't want to delay you..."

"It's fine!" A young, grey pegasus mare trotted forward, smiling warmly. "Hi, I'm Gold Star!" She indicated the last two creatures on the stage, a rather elderly donkey and a thin, youthful unicorn. "This is Pippy and Northern Lights!" She smiled warmly at both Ocellus and Starlight. "We really did want to talk to you, and we're glad you had time to talk to us!"

Gus rolled his eyes, clearly happy to let his more social colleague take the lead. "Whatever." He called off to a darker area behind the stage. "Yo! Gold Star's doing her spiel, you coming?"

"Hmm? Oh!" The voice calling back was familiar to Coco, but she couldn't place it. But once again, her colleagues smiled in recognition. She only had a moment for that to make her nervous before one of the most famous ponies in the world trotted out onto the stage, emerging from the shadows like a ghost.

"My!" Luna paused in surprise but managed not to spill any of the coffee she was levitating along with her. She trotted up to them, with a smile that was probably forced and fake but seemed as charmingly genuine as can be... princesses were said to be good at that. "How nice to see you, my friends!"

Coco has always been small, but the extent to which she felt small changed a lot. She felt miniscule when she was with Suri, but it had mostly been different since then. Now, staring up at this titanic alicorn (Coco literally checked to make sure Steven was actually larger than her) she shrank and shrank.

After the greetings and the hugging (Rarity had nuzzled the stunning giantess for maybe five or six eternities), Coco finally found her voice. "You... you know Princess Luna?"

"She's only my second best friend who's a princess!" Pinkie exclaimed. She paused, then grinned nervously. "Oh, sorry, Twilight's first and then all the rest of you are tied, is that okay?"

"Of course." Luna's voice was weirdly sweet for an entity that CREATED THE STARS. Coco very definitely noticed that no one else seemed to find it astounding that one of the former rulers of Equestria, an immortal, gorgeous alicorn, was just standing there with them.

But she felt Rarity acknowledge her, which very quickly made everything nicer. "Oh, how terribly rude of me. Luna, this is..."

"Coco Pommel?" Luna strode forward and shook Coco's limp hoof. She quickly blushed at the bemusement she was causing. "Ah. I'm... sorry for my exuberance. I'm merely a great fan of your work."

Coco gazed up in wonder. "You... are?"

"Indeed." Luna wasn't doing anything but standing there, but she looked like she was posing somehow. "Ever since I've been freed of my royal raiments, I've been more and more interested in the art of fashion. I... try to be an artist myself, and your use of shapes is quite impressive and inspiring! I would love to hear about your creative process."

"Tick tick tick tick!" Gus the griffon called out, flying by with some rainbow decorations in his claw and pointedly not looking down at anyone. "Tick tick. Clock noises. Tick."

"Uh, yes, I'm sorry to step in, but I'm sure you'll all get a chance to speak more later." Gold Star, clearly the 'ponies pony' of the committee, stepped forward, smiling warmly. "We do have to make sure everything's ready for the opening."

"And then tonight's block party," Gus muttered, flying back the other way. "And the two parades tomorrow, the speeches tomorrow night, the..."

"Oh, we get the point, sourpuss!" Steven chided.

"Yes. Thank you." Gold Star appeared to be the kind of pony who never stopped smiling, but it was somehow much less sickly-sweet than it was with Suri. "I'm glad to be able to speak with all of you. Especially you, um... Ocellus?"

Ocellus, startled at suddenly being the center of attention, nodded sharply. "Yes?"

"We're really glad you're here!" Gold Star reiterated kindly. "Pride has done a wonderful job at helping ponies... but like the rest of Equestrian society, I'm afraid we have not done the best at helping creatures that aren't ponies." Princess Luna's gaze dropped in what looked like abashment, which Gold Star noticed. "...And, I think the important thing is working to make every creature feel comfortable, moving forward."

"Y...yes," Luna replied quietly, glancing up at Pippy the donkey before quickly looking away again. "That's a goal we all wholeheartedly support."

"So," Gold Star continued, "we worked to start to have a more diverse organizing committee than we had before. Which is great! Without Steven, we wouldn't know how to solve accessibility issues for water-dwellers, for instance. But it also symbolizes a commitment to inclusivity. And we want to be inclusive to you, too. As an individual and as a changeling. Do you understand?"

"Um." Ocellus looked around, opening and closing her mouth. "Uh."

"Aw, c'mon Goldie, you're freaking her out!" Buster the notably young colt grumbled. He strode right up to Ocellus, shaking her hoof confidently. "Hey, Ocellus, right? I'm kinda an intern here, and I know my way around. Thought we could hang out during the events, if you wanted anything explained to you. And you can let me know if anything makes you feel weird."

"Oh!" Ocellus blushed but nodded. "Yeah. Okay."

"Cousin party!!" Pinkie screeched, dancing in a circle, and Buster handled it rather gracefully, all things considered.

Gold Star beamed adorably, eyes closed and mouth wide open. "Oh, hooray!"

"It's all going to be fine, though," Starlight snapped, a surprising amount of bitterness in her voice.

Everyone looked at her as if suddenly noticing she was present, which was actually probably related to the reason for her irritation in the first place. She pressed a hoof against her mouth, blushing. "Uh. Sorry, I didn't mean to sound so forceful. But we're all looking out for Ocellus's safety. She's fine!"

Buster opened his mouth to reply in a manner that did not look like it was going to be very inclusive, but Gold Star swerved in front of him, gazing upon Starlight with big, calm eyes. "Oh yes, we know! We were all so excited to hear from the headmare of the School of Friendship precisely because you've been so important in helping ponies and other creatures get along! Probably more than any other institution. We just want to make sure Ocellus feels included in our community to the extent that she wants, not just safe."

"Hm." Starlight frowned but nodded. "Well. Okay. Thank you."

Gold Star started talking again, but Coco did not hear any of it, because she suddenly became aware of the fact that Rarity was now leaning against her, just totally casually, as if it was nothing.

Coco looked over. Rarity was looking back at her, eyes half-lidded, smiling. She looked very much like she wanted to kiss her, right there in front of everypony, in the middle of some intense conversation about changelings and intersectionality.

For one boneheaded moment, Coco tried to feign confidence. She forced away the thoughts that the pony giving her such a heated look was a world-famous hero and a brilliant businesspony and someone who apparently had five billion startlingly attractive best friends.

But it didn’t last. Coco knew there was no world in which she could pull off being confident and cool, like Rarity was probably used to. She could not be sexy or glamorous or elegant.

But cute, she could do. She knew she was cute. And genuinely interesting. And maybe a little boring, okay, but boring in a reliable way, and her art wasn’t boring. Yes, she was cute and artistic and sweet and interesting and humble. And it was entirely possible Rarity was attracted to those things more than she was attracted to statuesque goddesses or intellectuals or royalty. For Rarity, she could be cute. And at the very least, for the love of all that was good in Equestria, she could pull it together and act like a normal grown-up.

“I just love looking at you,” Rarity breathed, and Coco lost the ability to act like a normal grown-up.

She realized later that this probably was a good thing, because it made her cuter. But at the moment, she didn’t think anything at all. She just gaped as Rarity leaned in.

“Rarity!” Starlight Glimmer yelled, very close by.

“NOTHING!” Coco heard herself yip automatically. She threw her hooves up over her face in chagrin.

Everyone was staring at them, and the whole group, even Gus the surly griffon, was looking quite amused by their predicament.

“Oh!” Rarity babbled, face reddening. “My, I. Oh dear, I’m terribly sorry, what were you saying?”

“Just asking if you were ready to go,” Starlight apparently repeated.

“Ah. Yes yes, of course. How lovely to have seen everyone! Steven, Luna, Mr. Stripes… I hope we have a chance to see each other when things aren’t quite so hectic!” She smoothly followed the others to the exit. Coco, far less smoothly, went too.

Amidst the friendly goodbyes, Steven, Luna, Pinkie, Gold Star, and the quiet donkey caught Coco’s eyes for a moment and gave her a smile. It helped.

Falling into step with Rarity, they headed towards the exit. Rarity’s expression was bright and cheerful and excited. She was clearly very happy, but there was something else… pleasant surprise, maybe? Almost… relief? Coco added it to the day’s list of confusing things that would make her worry if she thought too much about them, and she decided not to think too much about it.

Murder and Mayfemme

Trixie never really noticed how much Starlight brushed her mane. It seemed very unnecessary: right out of the shower, it just draped into its usual purple-blue waterfall, and the thick strands were not really in danger of getting frizzy (unlike Trixie's own mane, which of course never looked bad but required a little more effort to look amazing). Trixie had read somewhere ponies sometimes brushed their manes to relax, but judging by Starlight's mood, this was not her purpose either.

"It wasn't anything anyone did," Starlight grumbled. "It was what they didn’t do. I set the whole thing up, and they just... just forget I'm even there!"

Trixie poured herself a shot. "Uh huh."

"Okay, so they didn't need to talk to me. Nothing went wrong. But I'm not just tagging along! It's not like I'd have a problem with what Ocellus is doing, but no one even asked me! They talked to Miss Pommel more than me, and she's just Rarity's girlfriend, or whatever!" Starlight stopped brushing, glared at herself in the mirror, and then frantically began brushing again. "Grrf! And nothing against Miss Pommel! She's great to talk to. I wish I had talked to her more. But she isn't the whole reason Ocellus is even here!"

Trixie drank her shot. She poured another.

"It's just rude!" Starlight finally put the brush down and went over to her dress. She unzipped it and slipped it on, still ranting. "Only that Gold Star pony even said anything to me. And why? Because everypony already knows Pinkie? Well...gah!" Her horn got caught in her dress, and she flailed a bit before pulling it over her head correctly. "...Well, sorry I'm not as popular as Pinkie! Everyone just made their decisions about how things would go and didn't include me at all! I do all this work and everypony else just swoops in! Aagh!"

With that final groan of frustration, she took a deep breath, her magic zipping up the dress. After a moment, she walked back over to the mirror, calmer. "All right. Sorry I asked you to come over here while I got ready, but I had to gripe about it to somepony."

She looked back at Trixie with a warm smile, which quickly became a frown as a shot glass floated right up to her face. "Drink," Trixie declared.

"Oh, uh..." Starlight took the glass into her own magic, frowning. "This is, uh... 'pregaming,' right? Do I have to?"

"No, buuuuuut it's part of the whole thing. Buying overpriced cocktails is part of the whole thing, too, but you probably want to minimize that."

Starlight regarded her skeptically, then closed her eyes and dumped the shot down her throat. She managed not to cough, but she did stick out her tongue. "Gah! If this is pregaming, sign me up for the overpriced cocktails!"

"You know what? Me too." Trixie screwed the lid back onto her bottle of cheap whiskey and set it on the table. "This is the first time I've done this when I'm not just on tour, so I can actually afford them." She smirked. "This might actually be one way that having a real job isn't just for suckers."

"Uh, let's just add that to our running list of 'things you shouldn't say to your boss,'" Starlight replied.

Trixie chuckled unguiltily, glancing down at the piece of paper on the table next to the whiskey bottle. "Hey, what's this?"

"Hmm?" Starlight looked over, then widened her eyes in alarm. "Nothing! It's just..."

"'...you will feel confident and attractive. And whenever you walk into a nightclub this weekend, you'll find it easy and natural to notice the creatures who look willing and free, and then to automatically introduce yourself to the one you find most attractive.’" Trixie looked up, half-trying to keep from smirking. "Starlight, what is this?"

"It's just... some things to think to myself!"

"Was this that 'great idea' you kept talking about before we left? You want somepony to hypnotize you into being confident enough to pick up girls?"

"Gauugh!" Starlight snatched the paper away. "Fine. Yes! Moon Dancer did it on the train. And it's not funny!"

"It's a little funny," Trixie pointed out.

"It's just a creative solution to a problem! That's my thing!" Starlight set the paper down on another table, then, for some reason, laid a book on top of it.

Trixie shrugged. "Eh, I get it. You gotta use magic to keep up with me as my wingmare."

"It's not magic," Starlight grunted. "But... kind of yes? You've done this before! Mares like you!"

"They absolutely do." Trixie turned leisurely to the door. "Keep complimenting me, and I'll tell you all my secrets. You ready to go?"

Starlight sighed, smiling. "Sure, sure." She walked towards the door, calmly. "Oh, by the way, I love your dress. You look..." Starlight paused, because she was trying to open the door and it was not working. She glanced up, noticing a purple blob of magic up against the door frame, and turned around. "Uh..."

"But before we leave," Trixie said, "we have to talk."

"What? Wait..."

"I'm angry." Trixie trotted over to the mirror, fluffed her mane, and looked back at her best friend. "And I can't have fun while I'm angry." She paused, tapping her chin in thought. "Well. That's not true. I have lots of fun when I'm angry. But not this kind of fun."

"Trixie!" Starlight grunted. "Seriously? Seriously?! Is this the Ocellus thing again? Seriously?!! I can't keep apologizing for that!"

"Well, I'll never get tired of hearing you apologize." Trixie smirked. Starlight could take criticism, but this was dangerous ground, and so she tried to keep things playful. "But that's not exactly it. It's what you've been doing tonight."

"What?" Starlight asked, glaring. "I can't, like, guess what you're mad about. Just tell me."

Trixie raised an eyebrow. "I just had to listen to you complain... at length... about other ponies doing the exact same thing to you that you did to me. The thing you know I got mad about. The thing you said you can't keep apologizing for."

"Oh, come on!" Starlight protested. "This isn't the same thing at all! I just did all this work with Ocellus, and I wanted it to go right, and they just... ignored that and took over and decided things would..." She trailed off, frowning. "Oh."

Trixie kept her voice even; not angry, not condescending. "The thing is, you didn't even think this might get on my nerves. So this makes me wonder if you even understood why I was mad in the first place."

Starlight glared. "Of course I..." She stopped. Her brow unclenched, and she took a deep breath. "All right. Can you explain it?"

Trixie sat down, nodding. She tried not to let her relief show, but it probably slipped a little. "Okay, so, you know how some ponies judge me for the things I've done instead of giving me a chance to be a better pony? And you relate to that because of your own experiences, and that was the whole original basis for our friendship?"

"I... think I do?"

"Well, you don't."

Starlight blinked. "Then why did you a--"

"You wouldn't judge me based on my past," Trixie declared. "I know you understand how bad that feels." She paused, then just let it out: "But. I think there was a part of that for me you never really got."

"I'm not sure you want to have an evil-off against me," Starlight pointed out hesitantly.

"...No, I don't." Trixie paused. "Though I do have to say that when I was evil, I focused on quality over quantity, unlike some ponies I could mention." Starlight glared, but it was one of her non-serious glares. "Look, you've fought back from everyone assuming you're a terrible pony, and I really respect that. You know I do. But... you've always had your magic. All your magic. And everypony knows it. But me?" Trixie trailed off, then sighed. "Come on, you're not going to make me say it, are you?"

"I.... think you're going to have to," Starlight answered, "because I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Grrph." Trixie stared daggers down at the floor. "You've had ponies look at you and assume you're evil. But you've never had ponies look at you and assume you're a joke."

Starlight blinked, looking absolutely nonplussed. "A joke? What?"

"It's not like I don't get it!" Trixie grunted. "I brag all the time! I don't think things through! I'm always 'on!' I keep talking about how powerful I am, but it's all tricks! I'm selfish and lazy and annoying but basically harmless. Right?"

"Trixie..." Starlight hesitantly walked forward. "I don't think any of that about you. Neither do Sunburst or Moon Dancer or Maud or any of your other friends."

Trixie rolled her eyes. "Well, obviously. But... I know how ponies look at me. I know what Jackapple and Twilight and Roombah Dratch think."

"You know perfectly well that's not their..."

"You get the point!" Trixie snapped. "Lots of times, ponies think I can't be trusted to handle anything. I'll just be comically irresponsible and go... bat my eyelashes in the mirror or something."

"Wait." Starlight frowned. "Didn't you, just a minute ago, say something about how having a real job is for suckers?"

Trixie narrowed her eyes. "Sometimes, when creatures have bad habits, they artificially make a big deal about it. That helps reduce the tension and communicate shared awareness of the situation."

"Ah. Okay. Yes."

"Look. I know I really shouldn't be trusted to do a lot of jobs." Trixie glanced over to the side, adding under her breath, "Because a lot of jobs are boring and stupid." She cleared her throat and resumed speaking normally. "But I'm not just a joke. I can do some things. I can be a showmare, and I can be a guidance counselor."

Starlight nodded, eyes sad. "Right. And when I took over with Ocellus, that made you feel like I didn't trust you to do the job?"

"Yeah. It was like..." Trixie failed at not seeming sad. "...like you didn't take me seriously." She cleared her throat in hopes it would not hitch. "I get that all the time... and it's tolerable! Because I'm tough, and because it's mostly dumb ponies doing it! But. I don't want to feel it. Um. From you."

Starlight looked at the floor for a moment, then made hesitant eye contact again. "I'm sorry, Trixie. It annoyed me when the committee did that to me, but... yeah, I never thought they looked down on me like you're saying. I don't relate to it, so it didn't occur to me you'd be sensitive about it."

Trixie chuckled. "Well, of course. You're Starlight. No one's going to think you're a joke. You..."

"No!" Starlight snapped. "Stop saying ponies think you're a joke! It makes me really upset. I wish I could do what you do!"

"'Do?' What..."

"You put yourself out there!" Starlight interrupted. "Everyone notices you, and you make sure no one forgets you. And it's really you! If anyone thinks you're a joke, it's just because everypony else is too ashamed to show all the little parts of themselves, but you do. It doesn't even occur to you not to." She shook her head in wide-eyed amazement. "It's incredible." She coughed softly. "Um, okay, and it drives me completely crazy sometimes, too. But I'm envious! It's not something to feel bad about."

Trixie sat and blinked for a few moments. "You're really mad about this."

"Well, it's true! And look, I know you don't get along with all of my friends, but I really don't think they think that about you. They were all really supportive of you being the new guidance counselor. Everypony knows you're a good guidance counselor, and I'll try hard to not make you think I don't. No matter what." She blinked. "Well, not 'no matter what,' you still have to be professional. I just meant emotionally, not professionally, or..." She trailed off, squinting thoughtfully. "I reaaaaally shouldn't be my two best friends' boss, should I?"

"No, you should. It's great." Trixie smiled broadly, and then threw her hoof around Starlight's shoulder, flinging herself enthusiastically against her friend. "I'm not mad anymore!"

"Oof!" Starlight buckled slightly under the sudden contact, but she stayed up. "I'm, uh, glad."

Trixie trotted happily off to the hotel door and opened it. "Before we got sidetracked, I believe you were telling me how super-gorgeous I look in my dress?" she called over her shoulder. "Tell me more about that. I want details!"

"Hey, Trixie!" Starlight ran after her, distracted and blushing. But, Trixie couldn't help but notice, she didn't look nervous anymore at all.

"It's not like I don't know what genders are," Ocellus explained, waving her tiny yak hooves around helplessly. "We have genders. We have three. It's just... different."

Buster did not stop delightedly braiding her thick yak hair. "Uh huh," he muttered. She could feel his hooves and teeth poking and pulling on the back of her head; it was a very strange sensation. "Different how?"

"I don't even know how to say it!" She gestured out to the mass of creatures milling around the street fair. "Everyone is something, right?" She indicated a skinny, long-legged pegasus stallion strutting along. "Like, that pony is a 'he,' right? And you're a 'he.' But you don't look the same to me at all. It's on the inside."

"Huh." Buster was silent for a moment, then Ocellus felt a weird tug that was probably him shrugging. "Well, tell me about your three genders, then. How's that work?"

"Three genders!?" Pinkie Pie's voice yipped, startling Ocellus. The laughter instructor was suddenly back, holding a tray with three different, brightly colored objects stuck into it. "Are you sure you're old enough to hear about this, Ocellus?"

"I... think so?" Ocellus glanced down at the carrying tray Pinkie had, trying not to betray any emotions. "What are those?"

"Ee!" Pinkie flashed an enormous, delighted grin. "Snow cones! Don't tell me you've never had a snow cone?!"

"Um." Ocellus remembered not to move her head around too much so Buster could do his work, but in her heart, she recoiled back at least a few centimeters. "Are they supposed to be... colored like that?"

"Duh! They're sweet and frosty and delicious! Purple's my favorite, but I love them all! Here, pick one!"

Ocellus looked at the three snow cones, bemused. One was green, one purple, one orange. They all looked like hallucinations.

She hesitantly reached down and picked up the green one. Pinkie squealed, then held the tray behind Ocellus's head. "Uh, I'll have orange," Buster said. "Promise you won't tell Applebloom I'm eating anything orangey."

"Promise! Want me to hold it until you're done?"

"Thanks."

By this point, Ocellus had almost mustered up the courage to put the strange, green thing into her mouth. She scrunched up her face in determination, closed her eyes, and took a bite.

"Isn’t it ammmmaaaaaazing?!" Pinkie enthused.

It was not amazing. It tasted like smarminess and violence. The green nightmare coated her entire yak mouth, and it was all she could do to swallow. But she forced her eyes open and smiled as sincerely as she could to Pinkie.

"The best part is, it'll turn your tongue green! See?!" Pinkie stuck out her own tongue, which was already bright purple. Ocellus decided not to mention that she could change her tongue's colors any time she wanted, because her teacher was so delighted, the whole thing was really starting to feel like a laughter lesson. She just nodded.

"Um, so, our gender's kinda hard to talk about," she said, hoping it was appropriate to segue back to the original topic and noticing no feedback otherwise. "I don't think you really have words for it. There's what I am most of the time, and that's pretty much what you call 'she.' And then there's something like what you call 'he.' But we also have, um, I've heard them called 'workers?'"

"Hum," Buster grunted. "So workers are in the middle?"

"N...no, because shes and workers are close, and hes are more different. I... actually don't think ponies are very good at telling shes and workers apart. Workers are... well, they can't become queens, but that's a whole other thing." She thought for a moment. "Shes usually blink more than workers! Workers blink the least. Does that help?"

"The important thing is that you're a she," Buster said gruffly. "Right? You know you're a she, just like I know I'm a he. So what's the problem?"

"It's not the same," Ocellus objected. "Because for me, being a she is... okay, so, other changelings tell me it used to be each gender had a different job. The shes explored new territory, the workers gathered emotions near the hive, and the hes dug tunnels. So shes are 'out' and workers are 'up' and hes are 'down.' And I guess I feel pretty out-y, living in Ponyville and everything. But that's not who I am! If I got uppier, I'd get more workery. But that means I have to be a changeling on the inside, because I can't be a worker yak. Except maybe I can? Yona would probably say yaks are the best at gender. But sometimes I'm, like, a chest of drawers, and those don't even have genders. Or do they? What do you think?"

"I think your braids are done," Buster replied, stepping away.

"I really hope I haven't been misgendering my chest of drawers!" Pinkie squeaked. Then she relaxed. "No. We have a good relationship. If Dame Sockbelly was upset with me, she'd let me know."

Buster paused, then made a clear decision not to think too hard about it. He stepped in front of Ocellus, holding up a small mirror. "Oh, wow!" Ocellus marveled. "It looks so good!" It was true: her braids were more complex than Yona's usually were, but they were just as tight and ropelike. "It looks really... yak. You know? It looks like they do it. You're really good!"

Buster smirked proudly and took his orange snow cone. "Thanks. So, I can't help you with any of that gender stuff; I don't know what you're even friggin' talking about. But I'm getting pretty good at this."

Ocellus smiled, feeling and tasting that familiar friendship tang. "Thanks for hanging out with us tonight. I... hope you didn't miss anything important with the rest of the committee."

"Psh, you kidding? I'm just glad to have a break from all the drama! Gus and Northern Lights keep hooking up and then fighting and then hooking up again, and Pippy still hates Luna, and pretty much everyone has a crush on Gold Star, including Mr. Stripes's daughter, which is a nightmare, and Steven... you know, Steven's great, but they suck up a lot of the oxygen in a room sometimes. Or... they suck up a lot of the water in the... you know what I mean! I needed a night to just hang out and braid someone's mane."

Ocellus felt herself smiling, partly at the words and partly at how delicious everycreatures' feelings were at the moment. They sat and pony-watched for a bit.

"I used to be jealous of changelings," Buster remarked, completely out of nowhere.

Ocellus blinked. "You did? I… thought ponies were afraid of us."

"Nah. You can just... change." Buster's face was its typical collection of hard lines and gruffness, but there was a little bit of something else there, too. "Ponies can't." Casually and quietly, Pinkie reached to her side and placed her hoof on Buster's shoulder. "But it's never that simple for anycreature, is it?"

"I... don't think I understand," Ocellus admitted.

"Eh, fuggetaboutit."

Normally a dismissal like that would leave Ocellus anxious and perturbed, like there was unspoken trouble and unfinished business. But this was different; Buster's grin was honest and sweet. She nodded. "I will forget about it," she promised sincerely.

They sat there in silence a few minutes more, just taking in the throngs of celebrators.

It was not the kind of bar Moon Dancer would have chosen for herself, but she knew she would easily be outvoted. It didn’t take much to discern that Miss Pommel shared a “wine and cheese” kind of vibe with the other members of their little double date.

So, after Fluttershy (with almost no apologizing, happily) ordered herself a glass of sweet rosé, and Rarity ordered a bottle for herself and Coco, Moon Dancer was forced to select from the paltry beer options.

She ordered a pale ale from Geldgium, preparing herself for a judgy response from the waiter, but it never came. Whether it was because this place was less snooty than most wine-focused places, or because it was so crowded from pride that he was overworked, she couldn’t tell. It had an olive bar, though. She felt a completely unreasonable amount of contempt towards that olive bar.

But after their drinks arrived and Rarity excused herself for a strangely extended bathroom trip, she realized it provided an unexpected treat: Fluttershy apparently loved fancy olives, and watching her enjoy herself so purely made Moon Dancer happier than she had ever been.

“Oooh,” Fluttershy murmured, smiling adorably. She passed one of the little black ones over to Coco. “Try this one!”

Coco popped it in her mouth, chewing with thoughtful happiness. “Oh, I like it a lot,” she enthused. “It’s… a little tangy, and not too sweet.” They both grinned at each other and it was legitimately the cutest thing Moon Dancer had ever seen. Miss Coco glanced over at her. “Are you sure you don’t want any?”

“I’m fine,” Moon Dancer replied. She was currently willing to spend her life savings on olives for her fiancee, but that didn’t change that she despised the taste. “It wouldn’t really pair well with this, anyway,” she added, holding up her beer.

“Mm, I guess that makes sense,” Coco said. “I guess they expect everyone to order wine, here.”

“I feel a little silly,” Moon Dancer admitted. “I’ve just never liked wine. Every time I’ve tried… bleh, it just tastes like a rubber tire marinating in vinegar, to me.”

Miss Pommel giggled. “I’m the same way with beer. But ever since I started living on my own, nothing helps me after a stressful day more than a glass of good wine.” She paused, then blushed. “I mean… it’s not even the alcohol. I can just think about all the flavors. The… aesthetics of it? I guess?” She paused, then blushed even more. “I probably sound very haughty.”

“Ha!” Moon Dancer smirked. “I’m from Canterlot, so I have high standards for my elitism. I’m an elitism elitist, you might say. You having good taste doesn’t quite match up, sorry to say.”

“Oh. Well. Thanks.” Coco held up her glass, smiling. “Getting to enjoy this would make it worth it anyway, probably. I need to be careful, or I’ll drink the whole bottle before Rarity even comes back.”

Moon Dancer noticed Fluttershy frowning very slightly. Rarity had been in the bathroom for a while. With the chemistry she and Coco seem to be having, it was surprising she wasn’t rushing back.

There was a pause; it might or might not have been uncomfortable (Moon Dancer felt like it was, but she also knew she had a lot of false positives with that sort of thing). “So,” Miss Pommel ventured finally, “That committee was really something, huh? It seems like you’ve met a lot of them before, but I was kind of intimidated!”

“Oh, believe me, I was freaking out, too,” Moon Dancer agreed. “I’m… actually relieved to hear at least one pony didn’t notice.”

Fluttershy smiled empathically to Coco. “Was it Steven?”

“Um, yeah. Partly.”

Moon Dancer nodded. “Believe me, I get it. He’s j—” She shook her head, scowling at her own boneheadness. “Grrph. Sorry. They are just so big! But they’re also a real sweetheart.”

“Yeah.” Coco fiddled with her wine glass uncomfortably. “It was also… Luna. One of the former rulers of Equestria! It was incredible just seeing her!”

“Ahhhh,” Moon Dancer replied. “Yeah. See, I guess we’re a little unique, there. It’s kinda hard to be intimidated by that when you’ve seen the current ruler of Equestria accidentally put hot sauce instead of ketchup on her sandwich and then scream when she ate it.”

“Well… okay, but Princess Twilight is approachable. Luna’s different!”

“I was afraid of Luna at first, too,” Fluttershy assured Coco. “But she is a very nice pony. And maybe even a little… um. Nerdy?”

Miss Pommel gaped. “Nerdy?”

“Mm-hmm. Inside, she’s much more awkward and anxious than she seems on the outside. It always helps me to remember that most ponies I find scary are like that.” Fluttershy took a sip of her wine and then blushed. “Most ponies. I don’t think Mr. Stripes is anything but what he seems. He was the one I was intimidated by.”

“Oh, that’s funny,” Moon Dancer remarked. “Because I was freaking out that Dr. Pipp was there! We were all anxious for totally different reasons.”

“Dr. Pipp?” Miss Pommel asked.

“Pippy Pipp! She’s a historian and philosopher. Three PhDs. Great writer, too. She’s probably the reason they were saying all that stuff about being inclusive. I know Twilight read a lot of her stuff to prepare for teaching the Friendship School.”

“Huh.” Miss Pommel smiled nervously and adorably. “Thanks. I was worried I was alone and weird for feeling anxious.”

Moon Dancer laughed. “Trust me, you will never be alone in feeling anxious when you hang out with us!” She raised an eyebrow, glancing over at her fiancée. “Um, but speaking of anxious, I’m getting kinda concerned about what’s taking Rarity so long.”

Fluttershy, luckily, picked up on the cue. “Me too. I’ll go check on her.” With a demure smile, she excused herself to go to the restroom.

They were quiet for a moment. Coco, with an uncomfortable but genuine smile, poured herself a tiny bit more wine, probably just for something to do with her hooves. Moon Dancer suddenly felt like she knew what having a little sister is like.

“I bet I know what you’re thinking,” she remarked.

Miss Pommel looked up in surprise. “Um?”

“I’ve been in the same position,” Moon Dancer explained. “The Elements of Harmony. Famous for not only saving Equestria dozens of times, but also representing perfect friendship skills. It feels like they’re on some level above you.”

“Oh. …Yeah.” Miss Pommel glanced over at the bottle, clearly caught between her desire for more alcohol and her fear of how bad it would look if half was gone before Rarity even poured her first glass.

“I’m kind of lucky, because for me, it was Fluttershy,” Moon Dancer continued. “She’s so gentle, I was in love with her before it even really resonated with me that she was a superhero. Before I even knew it, we were almost engaged. The hardest part was her pet rabbit. Don’t ask.”

Miss Pommel blinked up at her, suddenly alarmed. “I’m not! I! I don’t think it’s really the same thing for me and Rarity!”

Moon Dancer pulled back, surprised. “Huh? Why not?”

“I mean… I’m not assuming it’s the same thing!” Coco clarified. She hung her head shyly. “I guess it’s probably easy to tell that I’d like it, if it was. But I don’t necessarily think that Rarity would…” She trailed off and went ahead and poured herself another half glass. “…you know.”

“Miss Pommel.” Moon Dancer stared at her companion. “Hey. Look at me.”

Gulping, Coco made eye contact. She was actually sweating, she was so nervous. Moon Dancer hadn’t noticed before.

“It’s not my place to tell you anything I might know about Rarity’s intentions,” Moon Dancer said. “But I’ll just say: what you’re worrying about? You don’t have to worry about it.” She leaned forward. “So you can relax. Get me?”

“Oh.” Coco paused, then nodded. “…Really?”

“I didn’t say anything,” Moon Dancer replied, sipping her beer.

Coco nodded. And she even smiled a little. It was adorable. “Thank you,” she said. There was a pause, and then she added. “Congratulations on your, um, upcoming engagement. I’ve always thought Fluttershy was so sweet; it’s really nice she has somepony she loves.”

Moon Dancer felt herself smile-blushing; it felt nice. “Did you meet them all together?”

“Yes. It’s… kind of a long story. Um.” Miss Pommel coughed lightly. “She was very nice, I think? I didn’t pay much attention to anypony but Rarity.” She sipped her wine, relishing the memory. “She wasn’t like anyone I’d ever met. She was a good pony, she just gave and gave without even thinking about it. But… I don’t know how to put it. She was so joyful about being good. It made her day. I hadn’t known anyone could be like that.”

She paused, then cowered very slightly. “I knew ponies could be generous! But I didn’t know you could be generous and happy at the same time. I thought you had to choose. Maybe it’s pathetic I had to meet someone like Rarity to stop thinking that way, but I did. She is really, um. Special. Like that.”

“Heh.” Moon Dancer took a thoughtful sip and nodded. “It’s not pathetic, by the way. It’s the curse of being smart and anxious.”

“Oh! Well. I can be anxious sometimes…”

“The whole world is full of dangers and humiliations and disappointments. Disappointments are the worst, for me. But if you’re smart, you can figure out how to avoid it all. So, you make rules to follow that minimize the problem, and then you forget you made them up.”

Smirking, she noticed it was almost nostalgic to talk about the Dark Old Days. “You know what I did? I said, ‘I can’t be happy if I interact with other ponies.’ And once in a while someone would walk up and go, ‘Hey, aren’t you lonely and bored?’ And I’d go, ‘Who cares! I’m following the rules, so it’s got to be better than the alternative! No disappointment!’”

Coco stared at her with wide, wondering eyes, pressing a hoof against her mouth. “It’s… for me, it’s when anyone thinks I’m… naïve or a little filly. Because of the way I look. So… so I assumed anything bad was just the way things were, and I wouldn’t let myself question it, because everyone might think I’m naive. I’d work ninety hours a week, but that was better than finding out I was dumb to ever think I shouldn’t have to.” She hummed to herself quietly. “How did you stop thinking that way? Was it Fluttershy?”

“Nope, it was some other friends. A group of them. But Fluttershy’s a pretty happy ending.” Moon Dancer waggled her eyebrows. “Looks like your happy ending’s coming back from the bathroom, finally.”

Miss Pommel blushed, and it was just a few seconds later that Rarity reappeared at the table, smiling gregariously. “I am so sorry!” she enthused to Coco, sitting down very close to her colleague. “I’m afraid I had to reapply some of my make-up; you understand.” She filled her glass from the wine bottle and took a sip. “Ah, wonderful to relax with such pleasant company!”

Moon Dancer smiled, but she stopped when she noticed Fluttershy returning, a weirdly discomfited expression on her face. Moon Dancer raised an eyebrow, but Fluttershy kept looking at Rarity.

Their two companions were paying no attention at all, though. Coco blushingly indicated the wine bottle. “Do you like it? It’s one of my favorites, but it’s not exactly a traditional…”

“I adore it!” Rarity exclaimed. “And I’m hardly surprised, my dear. Your excellent taste is one of the many things I love about you.”

Nopony said anything. Fluttershy frowned uncomfortably and… a little angrily? Coco was completely frozen, like someone took a photograph of her exiting an extremely jarring carnival ride. Rarity seemed to not even realize what she’d said before a moment, and she coughed awkwardly. “Yes. It’s quite delicious,” she added.

She hovered the glass over to Moon Dancer and Fluttershy. “Would you like to taste it? The richness is exquisite.”

“No, thank you,” Fluttershy said, and Rarity didn’t react at all.

“Yeahhh, same for me,” Moon Dancer added. “I, uh, don’t think it’d taste very good after my beer.”

“Ohh you and your artisanal beers!” Rarity exclaimed weirdly. Laughing, she leaned over and pressed her hoof against Moon Dancer’s shoulder.

“Uh,” Moon Dancer said.

Rarity smirked at her with a half-lidded gaze and it was very surreal to see. “Why, one of the most cultured and brilliant ponies I know, and she doesn’t even drink wine.” She leaned over to Coco conspiratorially. “I don’t know how Fluttershy puts up with her. Well, other than her being so pretty, of course. Coco, don’t you think Moon Dancer is just so pretty?”

Coco looked like she wanted to immediately die; Fluttershy looked like she immediately wanted to commit murder. Moon Dancer suspected she looked like both.

Rarity just kept going: “You looked to be having such a deep conversation when we were coming back from the restroom! Why, I could see the two of you making an adorably wonderful couple, if she wasn’t already with Fluttershy.”

Very luckily, at that moment, the door to the wine bar slammed open, startling everyone inside. Photo Finish walked in, wearing a brown wig and flanked by her entourage. “This is not a disguise!” she screeched.

Rarity and Fluttershy stared at the new arrivals, nonplussed, as a hostess led them to a table not too far away from their own. Photo Finish sat, directly facing them, staring. Coco had both of her forehooves pressed against her face.

“Oh, dear,” Rarity remarked. “How strange!”

Moon Dancer knew two things about Photo Finish: she was some sort of living performance art piece, and she terrified Fluttershy. She noticed she was leaning close to her fiancée protectively, but Fluttershy barely even seemed bothered.

Rarity at least knew to protect her sensitive friend, even if she didn’t seem to need it at the moment. “I… suppose I should go say hello? Coco, would you like to come?”

Coco nodded, looking as if she was calculating in her head exactly how loudly she wanted to scream. “Just pardon us a moment, girls!” Rarity sang, and the two of them went over to Photo Finish’s table.

Moon Dancer looked over at her fiancée in alarm. “What happened in the bathroom?” she whispered frantically.

Fluttershy glowered, an odd sight. “Rarity is…” She trailed off, unable to find the words. “I don’t know. She’s not…”

“I do not know you!!” Photo Finish barked from the other table at their startled friends. “I am a pegasus and my name is Sky Horse!!!”

Fluttershy was thrown off her game by that, so she didn’t say anything by the time their friends returned. But, they were giggling, Rarity bumping affiliatively up against Miss Pommel.

“My goodness, I should stop thinking she can’t surprise me!” Rarity whispered laughingly. She leaned slightly against Coco. “Such a character.”

“I can’t believe she didn’t even try to put fake wings on or anything,” Coco chuckled, leaning back.

“I wonder why she’s here,” Rarity remarked. “Could it be Pride?” Coco opened her mouth, but Rarity cut her off. “Actually, no. I should refrain from gossip; it’s a terrible habit. One should look one’s best when trying to impress a beautiful mare, after all.”

Miss Pommel just closed her eyes, a serene smile on her face, and rested her head against Rarity’s shoulder.

Rarity gave her a slight nuzzle, and Moon Dancer felt herself smile. But then she noticed that Fluttershy still looked unhappy, maybe even more than before, so she looked again. There were small cues, in the sapphire eyes, in the slight clenching of the forehead, the tension in the shoulder Coco was touching. Rarity was uncomfortable.

She noticed that they noticed. No one said anything. Photo Finish began walking in a slow, wide circle around their table, staring at them through little opera binoculars.

The silence was broken by the waiter, whose tired friendliness would have been charming under other circumstances. “May I get anyone anything else?” he offered pleasantly. He nodded to Fluttershy. “Another glass of rosé, perhaps?”

Fluttershy opened her mouth to reply, but Rarity jostled forward, startling Miss Pommel and nearly making her fall over. “I’m very much interested in what you recommend,” she purred.

He paused for a moment. “If you enjoyed your previous bottle, I’d perhaps suggest the Fienile di Vino Gomosso, 944? It’s similar, but a bit fruitier. Less oaky.”

She rested her elbows on the table and her chin on her hooves, staring dreamily at the waiter. “How delightful,” she replied. “We’re so fortunate to have such a helpful and handsome stallion as our waiter!” She reached out and pressed her hoof against his leg, looking back at the others with starry eyes. “Isn’t he just so handsome?”

Coco’s expression was unreadable. “All right…” the waiter said hesitantly, probably sensing that whatever happening was bigger than him. “So, would you like a bottle of that, um…” he tapped the bottle next to Rarity lightly. “…after you’re done with the other half of this? Or…”

“No, thank you,” Fluttershy answered, glaring at Rarity.

“Ah,” the waiter replied. “Well then, I will be. Um.” No one said anything to him.

“I’m going to walk away, now,” he announced. He stiffly turned and left. Moon Dancer appreciated his social skill.

Fluttershy looked mildly irritated, which was a sign she was boiling over with rage, so Moon Dancer jumped to her hooves. “Rarity,” she announced firmly. “Come with me. I need olives.”

Rarity had the gall to look confused. “Olives? But...”

“Getting olives is a two-pony job!” Moon Dancer snapped. With no further explanation, she walked toward the olive bar. Thankfully, Rarity followed behind.

As soon as they got far enough away from their own table, Moon Dancer pulled Rarity off to a dark, somewhat secluded corner. There were still ponies everywhere, but Moon Dancer’s body language efficiently communicated that everyone should walk in a wide arc around them.

“What are you doing?!” Moon Dancer whisper-screeched.

Rarity opened her mouth, probably to feign ignorance again, but she caught herself. She was silent.

“I thought you were on a date with Miss Pommel! Why are you hitting on the waiter right in front of her? Or me?!” Rarity shrunk in on herself, which only made Moon Dancer more frustrated. “She really likes you. You know that, right? Her heart is breaking, over there! If you don’t like her, you need to tell her right now and get it over with!”

“I do like her,” Rarity replied, voice soft but ragged.

“Uggggh! Well, okay, back to the original question, then: what are you doing?”

Rarity let out an appalled little miserable laugh. “I don’t think I have the slightest idea,” she answered.

“Well, figure it out!” Moon Dancer snapped, before stomping away. As she passed the olive bar, she grabbed a magic blobful at random.

Walking back up to the table, she took a deep breath. She had mostly done that to spare Fluttershy from a confrontation she’d likely be guilty about, and because she knew her temper, utilized wisely, was very effective at setting ponies straight. But she was actually really mad, back there.

Coco’s hoof was on the table, with Fluttershy’s resting against it, but they weren’t saying anything. “I’m sorry about that,” Moon Dancer said, levitating the olives over to Fluttershy, who sweetly managed a grateful smile even in the midst of everything.

“It’s okay,” Coco replied softly. “You aren’t the one who… um. I mean. Thanks.”

And then, before anyone was ready, Rarity was back. “Coco,” she said, following it up with nothing.

Coco was cowering, looking around the room helplessly. She locked eyes with Photo Finish, who was taking pictures of them with a tiny camera, and frowned.

“Rarity.” Coco drew herself to her full (still small) height. She stared her date in the eyes firmly. “I like you. I’ve had a crush on you since we met. I really want to have a romantic relationship with you.”

Rarity did not reply. Her mouth fell open; she looked gobsmacked by Miss Pommel’s firmness.

“I need you to clearly answer a question for me,” Coco declared. “Something I’ve been wondering all night.” Her eyes were stern. “Is. This. A. Date.”

Rarity did not answer. She was sweating, terrified and tense.

“Yes or no.”

Rarity opened her mouth. She closed her mouth again. She said nothing. She just stared, helplessly.

Miss Pommel wilted like a week-old salad. “Okay,” she said, very softly, all traces of confidence gone. “I’m sorry I thought you might…”

She ran for the door, her first sob clearly audible to everyone at the table. “Miss Pommel!” Fluttershy called, taking a few steps after her. She paused and looked back. “I’m going after her. Please do not follow us, Rarity.” After sharing a nod of understanding with Moon Dancer, she scampered off.

Rarity didn’t try to follow them. She just stared at the table, an expression of forlorn bewilderment across her features.

Moon Dancer could hear her own voice echoing in her ears: “Miss Pommel. What you’re worrying about? You don’t have to worry about it.” A black hole of guilt opened up in her chest.

“I swear, I didn’t know this would happen,” Rarity murmured, not looking at her. “I didn’t know she would like me. I didn’t know I would like her. I thought it would just…” Her voice trailed off.

Moon Dancer realized the black hole in her chest was actually anger. “I have to leave,” she said simply. “And I hate olives.”

Rarity nodded. “Don’t worry about the check, darling,” she muttered weakly, still looking down at the floor. “Everything’s on me, tonight.”

Moon Dancer paused for one moment: was her rage keeping her from recognizing that Rarity shouldn’t be left alone? But her (girlfriend’s) friend didn’t look frantic or irrational. Just sad and confused. Satisfied, Moon Dancer stormed out.

Miss Pommel wasn’t fully crying; she was doing a half-crying thing where she’d sniffle every few seconds and there were tears, but she wasn’t giving herself over to sobs. Fluttershy worried her presence was counterproductive; she was keeping Coco from getting her feelings out. She hadn’t said anything since giving her address to the cabbie; maybe she should have just let her go alone?

But after a final sniffle, Miss Pommel looked up at her with a wavering smile. “Thank you,” she said. “I didn’t know what to do with myself after running out of there.”

Fluttershy smiled back, resting her hoof against Coco’s front leg. That appeared to be enough. It was quiet, except for the clop clop clop of the cabbie.

“I don’t want you to validate the thing I’m about to say,” Coco said. “I’m saying it out loud for my own sake.”

“All right.”

“I didn’t embarrass myself by thinking Rarity might like me back.”

Coco nodded to herself, but Fluttershy felt awkward. “Um… if it matters, I could validate it. Would you like me to?”

Coco thought for a moment. “Yes, please.”

“You didn’t embarrass yourself for thinking that.”

Coco leaned against her. “...Do you know… why she was acting like that?”

Fluttershy paused, frowning. Finally, she just said it: “I think… it might kind of. A little bit? Be. My fault. In a way. Indirectly.”

She did not receive the anger she half-expected. “Hm? What do you mean?”

“She… I think she’s upset that I’m getting married. She’s jealous and worried, and it’s making her...um. Not act her best..” Fluttershy took a deep breath, trying to keep from getting too anxious. “I’ve been able to tell she felt that way for a while, but I kept avoiding talking to her about it. I’m sorry.”

“It is not your fault!!” a stern voice barked from the seat next to her.

Fluttershy emitted a frantic squeak and dove over Miss Pommel in fright, cowering between her and the door. She quiveringly peeked over and saw, head flung back in pride, Photo Finish sitting there in the cab with them. Not a hair on her brown wig was out of place.

“How!” Fluttershy babbled. “How did… did you…”

“I sneak!!” Photo Finish screeched, as if that explained everything. Coco seemed decidedly less startled by this whole thing, and she just nodded in greeting.

“If she is envious of her friend, then she must be honest about it!” Photo Finish declared. “Even if it is difficult to do so! I am baffled and perplexed that she has not had cause to learn such a lesson yet. I COMFORT!” With that startling yelp, she reached over and patted Coco on the head twice.

“I finish comforting,” she informed them. “And the observations of Rarity’s body language are conclusive! She finds you attractive. But! She is too immature to date.”

Coco smiled and nodded. “Thank you.”

“I GO!” Photo Finish yelled, and she literally jumped out the window of the cab, rolled to a stop, and then trotted off like nothing extraordinary had happened.

Fluttershy was too gobsmacked to say anything for the entire rest of the cab ride. But Miss Pommel didn’t seem to mind. She already looked like she felt better.

For the first night, Trixie decided to start simple: a place that wasn’t too crowded or noisy and wouldn’t require too much of a wait to get in. Still for singles, but maybe a slightly older crowd. Not the most exciting place for her, but anything more would probably overwhelm poor Starlight, who looked to be freaking out just walking in and standing near the bar.

“All right,” Starlight said bluntly, “I’m going to do it.”

“Right away?” Trixie asked. “Before you even get a drink?”

“I have to, before I chicken out.” Starlight nodded her head in the vague direction of a lone pegasus who seemed to be waiting for her friends. “Her.” Starlight paced in place nervously. “I can do this, right? It’s easy. Just, ‘Hi, I’m Starlight Glimmer.’ Easy, right?”

“Easy!” Trixie agreed.

Starlight nodded once, fixed a grim look of determination on her face, and marched off towards the unsuspecting mare like a prisoner of war being led to the interrogation room.

Trixie scanned the crowd. The place was a little dead, but there seemed to be a decent number of mares who were likely on the market. A couple of them glanced in her direction. She flashed a coy smile.

“I’m back!” Starlight announced, appearing by her side suddenly.

Trixie raised an eyebrow. “Already?”

“I walked up to her, told her I was Starlight Glimmer, and then immediately walked back here! I think I’m ready to go back to the hotel now!”

“You’re kidding me.”

“Nope! I said the thing and looked at her and realized she was even prettier than I thought and my throat got tight and then I just left! Is she looking at me?”

Trixie glanced over at the object of Starlight’s affection. “Yes. She looks very confused.”

“Well, I’m more humiliated than ever before in my life! Trixie, this is the worst. It’s the worst! How have you done this a bunch of times?”

“It gets easier.”

“I certainly hope so!” Starlight took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. “Look, we have two more nights. Let me just get my freak-out out of the way tonight and I’ll do more tomorrow. You stay!”

“Hmph.” Trixie sat down, pouting. “Well. Fine. But I am not letting you do this tomorrow night or Saturday night! If I’m going to be really successful, I need my super-hot wingmare!”

Starlight groaned, blushing. “Yes. Okay. I promise. Is she still looking at me?”

“No. Her friends got here and she’s talking to them. She looks fine.”

“That’s a relief. I’ll see you in the morning, ok? Good luck.” Starlight leaned over and nuzzled Trixie briefly, then pulled back and awkwardly strode out of the club.

Trixie shrugged. It actually went better than she had expected. She headed to the bar and leaned against it, coolly scanning the crowd.

The bartender approached and nodded to her. “What’ll you have?”

“Give me the bluest drink you can make.”

The bartender stared. “The… what?”

Trixie did not clarify. The bartender shrugged and went to work.

The drink Trixie received was blue enough. Not the bluest she’d ever had, but a decent seven on the blue scale. She handed some bits over and took a sip.

“Trixie,” said a voice next to her. It was a familiar voice, but delivered with an unusually musical timbre.

Trixie looked to her left. A white unicorn stood there, looking fabulous, giving her a half-lidded gaze.

Trixie blinked. “What are you doing here?”

“I should hope it’s obvious, darling.”

“Huh.” Trixie shrugged, sipping more of her cocktail. “Should I even bother using a pick-up line?”

“Oh, why not. Give me your best one. A lady likes to feel flattered.”

“Well, too bad. I don’t use pick-up lines. My stunning beauty does the job by itself.”

Rarity smirked. She took a step closer.

Femme de la Femme

After Rarity woke up, she kept her eyes closed for a little while. She figured, the longer she kept her eyes closed, the longer it would be before she had to look herself in the mirror. She knew she wanted to stave that off as long as possible, but she didn’t know if it was because of her shame or because of how her mane and make-up probably looked.

When she finally couldn’t hide in the dark any longer, the first thing she saw was Trixie sprawled out next to her, somehow equally shameless in slumber as when she was awake, mane and make-up still looking fantastic.

Rarity sighed. “I always have to go all-out, don’t I?” she muttered to herself.

“Have a pancakes,” Trixie said.

Rarity sighed again, a bit more dramatically than the first time.

“Pancakes don’t bounce, idiot,” Trixie protested.

Rarity reached out and delicately shook her bedmate’s shoulder. Trixie feebly waved her hooves like swatting at a gnat, then groaningly pried an eyelid open. Her eye darted around the room aimlessly then settled on Rarity. She glared. “You woke me up.”

“I did, because…”

“I was having a great dream. I was the pope of pancakes.” She shlubbishly rolled off the bed and landed on her hooves in what was admittedly an impressive feat of agility. “Ugg, hold on.” Mumbling, she walked into the bathroom, turned on the faucet, and stuck her face into the running water, holding it there for at least five seconds.

Thus refreshed(?), she turned off the water and walked back over to Rarity. “Okay. Hi. What. Why’d you wake me up?”

“I… just was…”

“Pancake four square!” Trixie suddenly yelped, as if realizing the answer to a difficult riddle.

Rarity just looked back at her, completely unable to think of a response.

“You know… four square?” Trixie explained. “The game?”

“I think I’ve seen it?”

Trixie opened her mouth to speak, then paused. “Huh. It was one of those things where I was dreaming and there was pancake four square. And I was like, ‘Hey, this is brilliant; everypony is going to want to play this! I need to remember this when I wake up!’ But… it doesn’t really make much sense in the real world, does it?” She scowled at Rarity. “Now I’m awake, and I don’t have a million-bit idea after all, and I’m hungry for pancakes. Why did you do this to me?”

Rarity realized she was hugging the bedsheets to herself nervously. She tried to relax. “I simply woke up and realized I really should go back to my room to prepare for the day.”

“Yeah, you look pretty bad,” Trixie confirmed.

“Yes.” Rarity had known this would be the difficult part of the whole process. All of their hotel rooms were in a row, with Trixie’s, then her own, then Fluttershy and Moon Dancer, then Starlight. She had successfully maneuvered them into Trixie’s room the night before, so there was no danger of anyone hearing anything through the appallingly thin walls. But finessing the dismount was proving tricky. “So. I was thinking I should go back to my room.”

“Uh, okay,” Trixie said.

Rarity glanced at the door and then back at Trixie.

“Bye,” Trixie said.

“My dear, you do realize that I am a lady,” Rarity began delicately. “And as a lady, it would be terribly uncouth for me to simply walk out of somepony else’s hotel room.”

Trixie raised an eyebrow. “So you live here now?”

“No, I simply wonder if there might be some more subtle ways to get to my room? You’ve been practicing magic, and I heard you’re quite an accomplished teleporter. Don’t you think you could…” she waved her hooves around vaguely. “...Poof us both over there and then poof right back?”

Trixie didn’t say anything for a moment; she squinted thoughtfully, as if considering Rarity’s suggestion carefully. Finally, a blithe smile popped rather suddenly onto her face and she shrugged. “Do you really want me to do that? You know, every time you teleport, you die.”

Rarity blinked in surprise. “I’m sorry?”

“Teleporting kills you. I thought every unicorn knew that. We can’t really teleport anything, so we just make a copy somewhere else and destroy the original.”

“I don’t…” Rarity rubbed her temple. “That couldn’t possibly be true.”

“Of course it’s true! Ask Starlight if you don’t believe me. Or whatshername, that friend of yours. The princess with the wings.”

“You are clearly fooling with me. I’ve seen you teleport. You wouldn’t do that if it killed you.”

Trixie grinned. “The Great and Powerful Trixie lives whole lifetimes in a single day!!, so I have nothing to fear.”

Rarity crossed her front legs over her chest petulantly and humphed. “I was hoping you’d be a gentlemare to a lady in distress.”

Trixie raised an eyebrow testily. “Your ’distress’ is caused by how ashamed you are for your friends to see you leaving my room. Why should I even want to help you?”

“I’m not…!” Rarity hopped out of the bed, unsure if she was alarmed by Trixie being appallingly on the nose or by her being appallingly incorrect. “I’m not ashamed!”

Trixie just nodded. “Okay then, I’m going to go tell Fluttershy we just hooked up.”

“No, don’t!!” Rarity rushed forward to stop Trixie from leaving the room. Trixie just rolled her eyes. She had not moved.

After a frantic moment, Rarity hung her head. “Fine, then. I am ashamed, but it isn’t about you. I made some terrible mistakes last night with Coco Pommel, and seeking you out afterwards was not the most mature manner in which I could have responded.”

“Yeah, I wasn’t gonna ask, but yeesh. Figured your date thing must not have gone well.”

“That’s an understatement, darling. So couldn’t you humor me? I’ve never had the knack of magic like teleportation, you see.”

Trixie glared for a few more moments and then sighed. “Fine, fine, fine. But I seriously can’t help. Think about it! They enchant the walls; hotels can’t have ponies teleporting in and out of rooms.”

“One would think, if they cared about such things, they would also bother to make the walls more soundproof,” Rarity muttered sourly.

“Soundproofing walls kills you, too,” Trixie remarked. “Being a unicorn is dangerous.” Rarity really tried to keep from reacting to this, but she failed. “Ha!” Trixie exclaimed. “I made you smile. That means I win.”

“I am not smiling,” Rarity insisted, not bothering to hide her smile. She raised her nose in the air haughtily. “And besides, if that’s the game, I’m still winning after last night,” she grunted, eliciting a gregarious laugh from her companion.

“Oh, whatever,” Trixie said, shaking her head. “If it’s so important to you, I’ll go out in the hall first and scope it out. If no one’s there, you can make a run for your room.”

“I suppose that’s the best we can do.” Rarity trotted up and nuzzled Trixie briefly. “Thank you. For this. And for last night.”

“Yeah yeah, sure,” Trixie replied breezily. She walked to the door, but then she paused and glanced back. “And sorry about that earth pony girl, last night. Seems like you liked her.”

Rarity paused in surprise and then smiled. “I feel a little better now.”

“Well duh, with such a generous and supportive friend around, of course you do!” Without waiting for a response, Trixie grabbed the door handle with her magic. “Ready to turn something as mundane as walking next door into an unnecessarily dramatic caper?”

“Oh please, darling. I do that every day.”

Trixie pondered that for a moment. “Me too, I guess.” Then she pulled open the door and darted into the hallway.

“...Honey?”

Fluttershy looked up from her green tea, eyes dopey. “Hmm?”

“Are you feeling all right?” Moon Dancer took a sip of her (horrible, bland, corporate but very convenient) Starbucks espresso and tilted her head in concern.

“Um. Yes. I guess.” Fluttershy hunched her shoulders slightly. “I have a teeny tiny bit of a headache, but I’m okay.”

“A headache?”

“Yes.” Fluttershy’s expression was not quite pouty, but she was getting there. “Just a normal headache.”

Moon Dancer raised an eyebrow. “...are you hung over?”

Fluttershy hunched her shoulders more. “No. Maybe. Don’t make fun of me.”

Moon Dancer couldn’t keep from smiling and leaning in towards her girlfriend. The nuzzle was accepted, but Fluttershy maintained a relatively sour expression throughout. “I have a spell I can cast on you, if you want.”

Fluttershy glanced around nervously: creatures milled about through various parts of the lobby, but the lounge area they occupied was empty. She nodded, looking absolutely pitiful.

Moon Dancer cast the spell. Fluttershy glowed white for a moment and then visibly relaxed the muscles in her face. “Thank you.”

“Of course. I knew I’d probably have to cast it a few times this weekend, so I’ve been practicing.” She sipped her drink and glanced sideways at Fluttershy. “Though I didn’t think I’d have to do it from someone just having one glass of wine.”

Fluttershy stuck her tongue out playfully and took a relishing inhale of her tea. “I guess I’m getting old.”

“Starlight’s older than you, and she’s going out all night.”

“Rainbow Dash used to make fun of me for always acting like such an old lady,” Fluttershy mused. “Maybe I’ve always been old. I just had to wait for my body to grow into it.”

Moon Dancer started to reply, but she noticed a small form hesitantly approaching their table. “Oh, good morning,” she said, waving.

“Uh, hi,” Ocellus replied. “I haven’t really had anything to eat since yesterday afternoon. Is it okay if I hang out with you for a little bit?”

“Of course,” Fluttershy said, already fully in Teacher Of The Month mode.

“Do you need us to be more lovey-dovey, or something?” Moon Dancer asked.

“No, just you two being together is fine,” Ocellus answered, which Moon Dancer could not help but take as a compliment. “It’s also nice to just be somewhere quiet after the crowds last night!”

“Did it go well, spending time with Buster?” Fluttershy asked. “Are you any closer to reaching any conclusions?”

“Oh, Buster was great!” Ocellus said enthusiastically, before frowning and shrinking in on herself. “But I don’t think I got any closer to what I was looking for. Um…” She looked up at them cautiously. “Professor Fluttershy, what you were saying before about being old… is that true? Can ponies be a different age on the inside, too?”

“Oh! Um, no, not really.” Moon Dancer had really not seen much of her special somepony as a Patient, Confident Instructor, and it was not having a minor effect on her. “It was just kind of a funny way of saying I don’t like excitement too much.”

“That’s a relief,” Ocellus sighed. “It’s been hard enough figuring out what I am already. I don’t know how I’d even start to think about another dimension.”

Fluttershy nodded with sympathy. “Well, have you considered that maybe you’re overthinking it?”

Ocellus gasped, looking appalled by the very concept. Moon Dancer was distracted by imagining Fluttershy peering over the rims of small reading glasses, but she heard herself gasp too, just out of pure, automatic instinct, apparently.

“I know you prefer thinking about things,” Fluttershy clarified to Ocellus but glancing at her girlfriend. “But that’s not the best way to solve every problem. Maybe just try seeing what feels right?”

Ocellus frowned in thought. “Well. I do like to be in touch with my feelings…”

“And you’re very good at it,” Fluttershy hummed in such a way that Moon Dancer could easily imagine her using to praise all her very best students. “Maybe just try doing that today and see if it helps.”

“Yes,” Moon Dancer agreed, not really knowing what she was agreeing with.

“I will,” Ocellus promised, nodding with sincere conviction. She pulled her recorder out and clicked it on. “Friday morning: Professor Fluttershy suggests I try just seeing what feels right. As a result, I plan to spend the morning engaged in journaling, meditation, and meditative journaling. More later.” She clicked it off and smiled at them. “Thank you! I think I’ll go back up to my room, now.”

“Oh… are you sure you ate enough?” Fluttershy asked.

“Yeah. Um.” Ocellus glanced at Moon Dancer awkwardly. “I’m pretty full, actually.” She waved. “Bye!”

Fluttershy waved. Moon Dancer didn’t realize she should until it was already too late.

“Oh, I’m very proud of her,” Fluttershy mused. “It’s been hard for her, transitioning from how things were with Chrysalis. She…”

Moon Dancer abruptly stood up. “We have to go back to our room,” she announced.

Fluttershy blinked in surprise. “...What? Why?”

“Because.” Moon Dancer turned to her, eyes flaming with intensity. “You’re a professor. You’re Professor Fluttershy.”

“....yes? I am?” Fluttershy scratched her head in confusion. “You knew that already.”

“Yes, I knew it. But I didn’t know it. Get me?”

“Not at all.”

Moon Dancer took a step forward. “You are a professor. Which means I can be your student. I can demonstrate my knowledge.” She paused. “...And earn a good grade.”

Fluttershy’s blush indicated she figured out what her fiancee was talking about, but the blush didn’t stop her from smiling slyly. “I suppose it might be time to… to have a surprise pop quiz.” She paused, then nodded. “Yes, that’s good, because I don’t actually do pop quizzes in my real classes. It keeps things separate.”

“Uh huh,” Moon Dancer said. “I can’t really listen to words right now, but yes. Upstairs?”

“Upstairs,” Fluttershy confirmed, turning and heading to the elevator. Moon Dancer followed behind, nerdy and grinning.

Rarity walked down the hallway as slowly as she could while still moving forward. She had remembered that Coco’s building, although huge and ominous from the outside, was actually quite warm and inviting within. The decor and colors were a mix of ultra-modern and quaint antique, funky and odd without crossing over into kitsch. The carpets were a rich garnet; the wallpaper displayed faded roses. As urbane as Rarity had become, it was hard for her to imagine growing up in a huge city. These details made it clearer.

Noticing all of this did not stop Miss Pommel’s apartment door from looming before her like a grizzly bear. The very prospect of knocking on that door was terrifying. Not quite as terrifying as it’d been to enjoy a pleasant date with an attractive pony she liked, but close.

Without thinking about it any more, she raised her hoof and knocked.

There was a pause and movement from the other side. Rarity steeled herself, marveling she could be afraid of seeing such a small, adorable mare. The door slowly opened.

Coco was much, much larger than she used to be. She also wore sunglasses, and she had styled her mane into an impressive pompadour. “Ah, Rarity!” she greeted. “How delightful to see you again, despite the unfortunate circumstances.”

Rarity’s brain did not catch up to what was happening for at least three or four full seconds, but Hoity Toity did not seem to mind or even notice. He stared off over her shoulder, chin high, waiting to be acknowledged.

“A...ah, yes!” Rarity replied finally. She couldn’t think of anything else to say.

Hoity Toity raised an eyebrow.

“It’s wonderful to see you too, darling!” Rarity continued. “I… must apologize; I did not expect to see you here.” His eyebrow raised higher. “Ehh, well, of course I had heard you were in Manehattan this month! I had meant to thank you for stopping by Rarity For You; my entire staff was besides themselves with excitement! I simply… had hoped to speak to Miss Pommel about a bit of a personal matter.”

“Indeed, indeed.” Hoity Toity never turned his face directly towards her, and his face remained a pleasant smile, but somehow she knew that behind his sunglasses, he was staring intently. “She contacted me early this morning, and I simply had to rush over. She’s in quite a state. Such a sensitive one, but then again, these outre geniuses often are…”

“Oh…” Rarity sagged, feeling cold and cruel. “Did she tell you why she was upset?”

“Yes, but to be honest, the whole thing was a bit incoherent. I gathered that you were involved, however, so I’m quite relieved you’re here.”

Rarity heard a noise down the hall; she looked to see a pony leaving his apartment and walking away from her. “Ah, is Coco inside? I admit to feeling a bit awkward having this conversation in the doorway.”

“Yes, she’s in the other room," Hoity Toity replied, clearly not feeling the least bit awkward having this conversation in the doorway. "And I simply want to clear this misunderstanding up before we go any further. Why, at certain points in our conversation, it almost sounded as if you led her on in a romantic sense, only to dash her hopes!”

“Eeeg,” Rarity grunted, ears flat on her head. “Well…”

“I know, it would be such a scandal!” he exclaimed. “Miss Pommel has become quite popular in our little community; she has many dear friends, and I include myself among them. Why, if you had treated her cruelly, who knows if your career would ever recover.”

Rarity stared at him with wide eyes, but he laughed casually. “Oh, don’t worry, I don’t believe it for a second.” He leaned closer and spoke under his breath. “Miss Pommel is delightful, but she is… innocent, yes? A filly like that could easily misinterpret things.”

“Hoity T…”

“Tut tut, my dear. It’s obvious what’s happened: a naive little mare got some foolish ideas in her head and confused your generous nature with interest, and…”

“Now, see here, Hoity Toity!” Rarity snapped. “I simply won’t have you saying such things! Coco was a delightful companion, and it was my own beastly behavior that ruined the evening! And if you are truly her friend, you will not act like this behind her back!”

Hoity Toity didn’t respond for a moment; Rarity suddenly realized that he had probably never been talked to like that for his entire adult life; she wondered why she wasn’t afraid. “Well then,” he said. “How about that.” And to her shock, he took a step back, gesturing with his hoof. “Please come in.”

Too surprised to speak, she complied. After closing the door behind her, he walked over to the bedroom and knocked. After a moment, the door hesitantly opened and Coco stuck her head out.

“She didn’t do it,” Hoity Toity announced.

Coco sighed. She looked at Rarity, then back to him. “Did she even pause to think about it?”

“Not for a moment.”

“Of course not.” Coco walked mopily out into the living room. “Hi, Rarity.”

“Wait.” Rarity looked around as if some detail in the room would clear the situation up for her. “This was…”

“Hoity Toity said he would say those things to you if you showed up,” Coco explained. “To see if you’d care more about your career than me.”

“I’m terribly sorry about the deception!” Hoity Toity added. “It was all my idea. I majored in drama, you see, but I never get the chance to actually do any acting. I couldn’t resist!”

“This was… some sort of test?” Rarity asked, blinking at Coco in bewilderment. “You wouldn’t see me unless I defended you?”

“No, I was going to see you either way,” Coco interrupted sadly. “I just…” She sighed again. “This would just all be easier if you weren’t such a wonderful pony.”

“Neither of us thought for a moment you’d do anything else!” Hoity Toity assured Rarity. “Not that it truly mattered. If romantic drama ruined fashion careers, Prim and I would have drummed one another out of the business a hundred times already!”

Rarity sat down on the floor, trying desperately to get her bearings. “I must admit I’m…” She glanced at Hoity Toity. “Wait, you and Prim Hemline?”

“Indeed. And your colleague Sassy Saddles, back when she was a model. Fleur de Lis, of course, though admittedly we’d only have reason to drum one another out of the business three or four times…”

“You’re just bragging by this point, H.T.,” Coco remarked.

Hoity Toity placed a hoof against his chest in mock offense, and then he laughed. Coco managed a giggle. Rarity was not sure if she was more surprised by that or by the fact that one of Equestria’s most powerful fashion mavens was joking around like a normal pony.

“I believe it’s time to take my leave so you can talk,” he announced. “Farewell! Rarity, I deeply hope we get a chance to speak under more pleasant auspices very soon.” He nuzzled Coco briefly, then walked to the door, somehow managing to pull it open without breaking stride. “Ta!”

As the door swung shut, Rarity took her first good look at Coco: perhaps slightly disheveled, but certainly not the look of a pony that had stayed up the whole night weeping. “My dear,” she ventured hesitantly, “I have to thank you. I was terribly anxious about our… talk, but right now I’m not really able to manage anything but bemusement.”

Coco didn’t say anything, instead just casting a nervous look at the floor.

Rarity sighed. “Well. I suppose I should just get into it.” She stood and walked a step closer to her friend, looking her in the eyes as seriously but as gently as possible. “I came to apologize. I treated you awfully last night, and I have no excuse.”

Coco nodded. “Thank you. I think I acted badly, too. I put you up on a pedestal, and it wasn’t fair.”

“Coco…” Rarity trailed off, feeling sorrowful more than anything else. “I… don’t wish to argue about your own feelings. But really and truly, you have nothing whatsoever to apologize for.”

Coco seemed to be shrinking, but she was holding her ground. “Um. Okay. I just… with everything you meant to me after Suri, the way I liked you probably wasn’t healthy.”

“Oh, darling.” Rarity felt herself smiling. “If you didn’t see us as equals, then perhaps anything between us would indeed ultimately be doomed. But last night, I never gave anything but my own neuroses a chance to interfere.”

She stepped forward and put a hoof against Coco’s cheek; it felt like the right moment. “It seems I have a great need to sabotage myself, and I didn’t even consider that your feelings might be hurt as a result. I’m ashamed because of that.” She noticed that Coco was leaning against her hoof a bit too much and gently pulled it away. “But even more than being ashamed, I’m disappointed. I surprised myself by how much I liked you, once I opened that door. But I couldn’t help but ruin it.”

Coco looked up, impossibly cute. “You did like me? It wasn’t my imagination?”

“No, darling. Ah…” Rarity coughed uncomfortably. “I find you very attractive, although you understand if I prefer not to talk about it after last night.”

“Yeah.” Coco blushed sadly. “You should talk to your friend Fluttershy, by the way. She said some things that made me think it’d be good.”

“She’s next on my list of shameful apologies,” Rarity replied. She sighed, feeling sorry for herself, then shook her head to break out of it. “But first things first. I may not deserve your friendship, but I really do see you as a dear friend. Because of that, I truly hope you can forgive me.”

“Rarity…” Coco sighed, slumping her shoulders. “We are friends, and I do forgive you. Last night hurt, and… I am still a little angry. But it’s not like I saw you as my one true love or anything. I’ll be fine after some moping.”

Rarity tried a wan smile; it was not returned. “Are you certain? I feel just terrible, and I want to do whatever I can to mitigate what’s happened. I’m leaving town after this weekend, but if there’s anything I can do to make things easier...”

Coco glanced off to the side and mumbled something.

Rarity leaned closer. “What was that, darling?”

Coco opened her mouth, then paused. “...Never mind. It’s stupid.”

“I’m sure it isn’t!” Rarity exclaimed. “Just name it, and if it’s within my power, I’ll do everything I can.”

“I… no. I shouldn’t have...”

“Coco, really! I’ll…”

“I want a date with Luna!” Coco blurted. Then she blinked, an expression of complete surprise on her face.

Rarity froze, literally unable to speak or move. It got uncomfortable, partly socially but partly because of her lack of oxygen, so she forced herself to inhale, trying desperately to pass the subsequent gasp off as a throat-clearing. “Um. I’m sorry, Coco, what…”

“You know Princess Luna, right?” Coco had recovered from her surprise. She was looking right at her, still very cute but suddenly kind of intimidatingly confident. “I want you to see if she’ll go on a date with me.” She deflated slightly. “I mean, only if you feel comfortable. I can’t believe I even said this.”

“I’d be happy to ask her,” Rarity said, almost automatically.

Coco nodded, and was that a slight smirk on her face? “I forgive you either way. But if that’s the sort of thing you could do, then it’d go a long way towards keeping me from drumming you out of the industry.”

Rarity pulled back in surprise, then was even more surprised to feel herself relaxing. “Hoity Toity was lying about Fleur de Lis, wasn’t he?”

“Oh yeah. A hundred percent.”

They shared a laugh; it felt great.

“You’re so weird,” Coco remarked. “I was completely terrified about seeing you, but it ended up being kind of easy. How come you’re so good at this, but you were so bad at our date?”

“That’s the question, isn’t it?” Rarity looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully and then shrugged. “I’m not sure. When you’re Coco my dear friend, I want to do everything right. When you’re Coco the romantic partner, it all falls to ruin. It’s a mystery.”

Coco nodded. “We wouldn’t be designers if we didn’t have issues.”

Rarity laughed. “Oh, how true! Though I suppose we should be grateful we’re not models, or it’d be ten times worse.”

Coco smiled, and then she got an expression on her face that clearly indicated she wanted to hug but worried it might be terribly inappropriate (Rarity called it ‘The Fluttershy Grimace’). She tentatively stepped forward and they nuzzled briefly, platonically.

“I… suppose I must be going,” Rarity said as she stepped away.

Coco nodded and walked her to the door. “Just to warn you,” she said, “I told you I’ll be fine, and I will. But I am going to make some really screwed-up outfits because of all this.”

“Oh my. Is it all right that I actually find that somewhat flattering?” Rarity tilted her head thoughtfully. “You truly are a fantastically talented designer, Coco. I hope, the next time we see one another, we have more time to talk about that.”

“Me too,” Coco replied. Then she glanced away, as if preparing herself for something. “Um, before you go, could I ask a favor?” Rarity raised a curious eyebrow; Coco had that steely cuteness again, but it was somehow vulnerable this time. “Could you... not call me Coco?”

“Um…”

“It’s not you. It’s everypony, even my close friends. Especially my close friends. I really prefer being called Miss Pommel. Like… like a stage name.”

“Miss Pommel.”

“Mm-hm. It makes me feel, um, older. That’s a big deal, for me.”

Rarity slowly nodded. “I can do that. ‘Miss Pommel.’ It does have a dignity to it, does it?”

“I think so.” Miss Pommel thought for a moment, then held up a hoof. “You could also call me The Coco. That’s what Photo Finish does.”

“Does she?”

Miss Pommel posed. “I, Photo Finish, am going to get coffee! Would The Coco like a non-fat mocha latte?!”

“I… think I’ll stick with ‘Miss Pommel,’ if that’s all right.”

Some Femmeblance of Normalcy

Fluttershy had personally known a large number of dragons in her life, but it seemed nothing could keep her from finding them fascinating. So when a float rolled by that was full of gay dragons (mostly young, but one enormous adult who may or may not have been asleep), she hovered up above the crowd to see better, eyes full of childish wonder, clapping her hooves. With the way she’d chosen to dress up for the parade, it made quite a sight.

Starlight didn’t really see what the big deal was, but one glance around told her she was in the minority there. Most of the other ponies nearby looked confused and a little scared, but Fluttershy’s soft cheers were quickly amplified by Pinkie, which soon resulted in vocal approval spreading through the crowd. The dragons were of course all far too cool to react, but Starlight liked to think they appreciated it.

She craned her head to check Ocellus’s reaction, but she was too far away to see much. The group correctly surmised a parade would be far too stimulating to expect Pinkie to chaperone anyone, but Ocellus was living up to the trust they’d put in her, just standing nearby and watching the parade. But the little changeling appeared to just have the same pensive expression on her face that she’d had all day.

Everycreature was a little off today, it seemed. Pinkie could be seen leaping up out of the crowd periodically like a spawning salmon, manic with delight. Fluttershy was still her demure self, but she had decked herself out like a chandelier constructed wholly from gay pride, and although it was sweet to see, it was also a little unnerving. Luckily Moon Dancer was just her usual staid self (though notably in a very good mood, for some reason).

Starlight glanced over to make a remark to her nerdy friend, but she paused in surprise when she saw her a few meters away, talking to somepony. Her conversation partner was wearing about as suspicious a costume as would be possible: trench coat and fedora obscuring every identifiable feature. Moon Dancer glanced back, noticed she was being watched, and quickly trotted back over, guiltily plastering on a smile of perfect innocence.

“Hey!” she said, arriving back at Starlight’s side.

“Hhhhhhi,” Starlight replied. She glanced over to where Moon Dancer had been, but the other pony was gone. “What were you doing?”

“Not doing!” Moon Dancer insisted. Her smile slipped. “I mean. I wasn’t doing not anything.” She shook her head. There was an uncomfortable pause. “No.”

Starlight raised an eyebrow. “Why were you talking to somepony in a trench coat?”

“Hm?” Moon Dancer glanced back. “Oh! Yeah. That’s not a trench coat. It’s a duster.”

“Um. Okay, but…”

“Hey, dragons!” Moon Dancer interrupted, glancing at the receding float. “That reminds me, hey Starlight, weigh in on a philosophical question, would you? Fluttershy and I have been discussing this.”

Fluttershy floated back down to the sidewalk now that more mundane floats were passing by. “Oh, is this about the portal?”

“Yeah.” Moon Dancer pushed her glasses up her nose and stood formally. “All right. Now, Starlight, do you agree that the life of sentient creatures is worth protecting?”

“Ummm.” Starlight raised an eyebrow. “This is gonna be a trick.”

“No, no tricks!” Moon Dancer was clearly having the time of her life. “Let me put it this way. Do you agree with the following statement: ‘If a sentient creature maintains a high quality of life and also does not negatively impact anyone else’s quality of life, then it’s better for that sentient creature to life longer than to live shorter.’”

“Yyyyyyyes?” Starlight answered, very much not trusting where this was going. “I guess?”

“Okay then. Now, three relevant facts. One: dragons live thousands of years. Two: dogs live ten to fourteen years. Three: Spike, a sentient creature, is either a dog or a dragon depending on if he’s in the human world or our world.”

Starlight frowned. “Oh. That’s…. Hm.” She scratched her head in thought. “So, you’re saying dog-Spike should live over here?”

“I’m saying we’re morally obligated to bring Spike over here,” Moon Dancer clarified.

“Um, and I disagree,” Fluttershy added. “I don’t like saying how long animals live is bad, because, um, their lives are right for who they are.” She glanced around nervously. “But I don’t have a big argument supporting that or anything. I’m probably wrong.”

“Not at all!” Moon Dancer insisted. “You know way more about creatures than I do; of course your intuitions there need to be taken seriously!”

Starlight glanced back and forth between them, then sighed. “I’m really sorry, I can’t have a serious philosophical discussion with you looking like that.”

“Like what?” Fluttershy asked, adjusting her rainbow-colored top hat so it wouldn’t smudge her lavender face paint. “I… oh wait a moment, I’m sorry, my tutu is a little…” She adjusted it, using her wings to help balance on her pink stilettos. “That’s better.” She looked back, smiling gently. “Like what?”

“Never mind.” Starlight shrugged. “The whole human dimension is just weird, anyway. They have fingers! Their hooves just have little tentacle things growing out of them, and no one seems to care.” She huffed, annoyed. “And Sunset? Sunset’s my friend, but come on! She’s like an alternate universe me, but she’s not, because there literally is an alternate universe me somewhere.”

“Um, I think talking about fingers might be kind of… taboo for them?” Fluttershy spoke up. “I asked Fluttershy once what she uses them for, and she got really quiet and embarrassed.” She glanced over to her special somepony. “Did anything like this happen to you?”

“Ugh, no,” Moon Dancer replied, rolling her eyes, “but I’ve, uh, kinda been trying to avoid writing to my counterpart.”

“Oh!” Starlight exclaimed. “Is it because she’s dating the human Trixie? That’s totally weird, right?”!”

“Ehh…” Moon Dancer hesitated, scrunching her forehead in thought. “No? The Trixie thing seems like it’s going fine.” She sighed. “It’s just, my counterpart over there started a rap group with a friend of hers, and it’s all she wants to talk about.”

“Ohhh,” Starlight said, wincing. “Is it that bad?”

“She rhymed ‘hypothalamus’ with ‘try to rap with us.’”

“Ahh.”

“She rhymed ‘truculent’ with ‘Duck Hunt.’”

“Ehhhhhhh...”

“You absolutely do not want to know what she tried to rhyme ‘synecdoche’ with.”

“Okay, okay!” Starlight grunted. “I get the point.”

“Why would I be bothered about Trixie?” Moon Dancer asked, raising her eyebrow.

“It’s just… you’re friends!” Starlight explained. “It’s weird! Friends are friends.” She glanced over at Fluttershy. “It’s gotta be kind of uncomfortable for you, right? That even an alternate universe Moon Dancer would go after Trixie?”

Before Fluttershy could answer, Pinkie descended upon them like a crashing helicopter. “Girls!” she screeched, waving her hoof frantically at the newest passing float. “Clowns! Look! Gay clowns!!”

They looked. There was indeed a float full of prideful clowns rolling by. One of them shot another with seltzer, causing Pinkie to scream like a falcon.

Ocellus walked up to them hesitantly. “I have some questions about the gay clowns,” she said.

Laughing wildly, Pinkie leapt away. Ocellus followed her, stammering queries.

Moon Dancer glanced at Starlight. “You were saying something about friends being weird?”

“I would never have a problem with what human Moon Dancer does,” Fluttershy said, toying idly with one of the many glow sticks wrapped around her leg. “And if it means Moon Dancer could be attracted to Trixie over here, that’s fine, too. I trust her.”

“Gah, no, stop!” Starlight snapped, squeezing her eyes shut. “All this is too weird! Dating your friend is wrong.”

“Eh.” Moon Dancer shrugged. “I’ve asked out a friend before.”

“What?!” Starlight nearly shrieked. “Who?! Why?!”

“Minuette. And because I had feelings for her.” She smiled with sad nostalgia. “I’d just come out, and she was one of my best friends, and… it felt right, I dunno.”

Starlight covered up her face with her hooves like she was hiding from a bogeyman. “What happened? Did she turn on you?!”

“Turn on me? What are you…” Moon Dancer shook her head in confusion. “No. She said she was straight and that she loved me as a friend, and then she made a dumb joke about tomatoes or something, and that was it.”

“I don’t… aggh, Fluttershy, help!” Starlight looked over at her friend in desperation. “You’ve never asked out a friend, right?”

“Um.” Fluttershy peered back diffidently over the rims of her giant novelty sunglasses. “I… did. Once.” Starlight’s mouth fell open in horror, so Fluttershy anxiously continued. “It wasn’t a very big deal. She had recently moved to Ponyville, and I thought she was pretty, so I just asked her to spend time with me taking care of animals.”

Starlight’s mouth fell open even wider. “And she couldn’t be friends with you after that, right?”

“N-no!” Fluttershy stammered. “I, uh, actually think she misunderstood me? Because she ended up thinking it was kind of an educational activity sort of thing, and then she invited a lot of other ponies over at the same time. Um. But what I’m saying is, that was fine! I got to feel proud of myself for being brave enough to ask, and we stayed friends.”

“This… this…!” Starlight sputtered, unable to put a thought together. “This is nonsensical. Who even was this pony?! How could she not have been upset?!”

Fluttershy glanced awkwardly at Moon Dancer, then scrunched up her face in thought. Starlight sympathized with her; it was probably really awkward to even think about whoever this supposed “friend” was.

But, before she could speak, there was a gentle throat-clearing off to the side. “Headmare Starlight? Professor Fluttershy?” Ocellus stood there, pointing at the parade. “I’m confused about something. Because that group of ponies had a banner that said they were bears, but it was clearly just ponies! What does that mean? Can ponies be bears?!”

“Uhhhh…” Starlight glanced over at the big, burly stallions marching by. “You see…”

Ocellus gasped. “Am I a bear?!”

Thankfully, she did not choose to transform into the largest, most terrifying bear possible. It was a mid-sized bear, brown and fuzzy. Quite cute, actually. But that did not stop a number of nearby parade-watchers from screaming in terror.

The bear frowned. “It… I don’t know, it doesn’t feel wrong, but…” She transformed back into herself, a thoughtful expression on her face. “I…”

“Is that a changeling?!” somepony yelped nearby. The nearby members of the crowd who hadn’t run away were all staring.

“What’s it doing here?” someone wondered loudly. Ocellus shrank down, shaking. Starlight, secretly glad to have a clear mission, strode next to her, staring down the onlookers. Moon Dancer and, with just slight hesitation, Fluttershy stepped up next to her. Pinkie literally fell out of the sky to join them.

“She is watching the parade,” Starlight asserted. “And she’s not bothering anyone, so…”

“Are there changelings in Manehattan, now?” someone asked.

“I didn’t know changelings could be blue!”

“I can’t believe I called her ‘it,’ I feel so awful....”

“Oh neat, a changeling! Have you met Princess Twilight?!”

“I wish I could turn blue...”

“Aw, she’s adorable!”

Ocellus’s pony defenders tried to respond to each comment, but it was starting to turn into an incoherent roar. Starlight was relieved everypony was being more-or-less accepting, but that did not appear to be a comfort to Ocellus, who was lying on the sidewalk, shivering. “Please, she’s very shy…” Fluttershy tried, but it did not abate the enthusiasm.

Starlight had a great idea to just magic her way out of the situation by conjuring an oppressively thick fog, but she realized this was one of her bad good ideas and tried to think of something else that wouldn’t ruin the entire parade. But suddenly, a voice called out, loud and piercing enough to be heard over the crowd: “Aaaa! Is that my very best friend, Ocellus the changeling?!!”

Starlight looked. A float had stopped in the parade path, the ponies pulling it apparently confused by the disturbance in the crowd. The float itself was mostly a huge tank of water, and its occupant waved their claws in obvious delight. “Well, come here, honey!” Steven Magnet enthused. “I need your help!”

Pinkie gasped and looked back and forth between Ocellus and Starlight. Ocellus, after a shivery pause, nodded. Starlight shrugged.

“Sorry everypony, we gotta go!” Pinkie called, grabbing Ocellus and leaping into the air. Starlight watched her skip across the crowd, bouncing from scalp to scalp, over to where Steven’s float waited.

Before Ocellus even knew what was happening, she was confused and agitated on the float; Steven’s tank took up most of the front, and the rest of the surface was decorated like a giant aquarium, with gaudy, plastic anemones and papier-mache pebbles all around. Steven sat in their tank, grinning at her. Pinkie was gleefully poking at the fake diving suit someone had made.

“You all right there?” Steven asked, pressing a claw against their face.

“I’m… fine,” Ocellus answered, before glancing over at her teacher. “Um, Professor Pinkie Pie, I do have wings.”

“Wings aren’t gonna save you from the ghost of Captain Roanbeard!” Pinkie called back to her, waving around the arms of a fake skeleton dressed in a pirate outfit. She laughed joyfully, but also like a pirate. “Steven, your float is so neat-o!”

“It’s better in the water part,” Steven replied, patting the surface of the water. “Oh please come join me, Ocellus.”

Ocellus nodded. The staring crowd was just a blob of ponies now and not individual, staring eyes, but it was still a huge relief to be able to transform into something else. She splashed into the tank, and a seapony’s head popped up next to Steven.

“Aaaagh!” They shrieked. “You look so classy!” They leaned close, winking. “If you ask me, everyone around here could use a few scales.”

Ocellus couldn’t keep herself from grinning back. She idly noticed that the ponies pulling the float had resumed their place in the parade, so the crowd was shifting. It wasn’t scary at all being in front of everyone, partly because Steven and Pinkie were so happily soaking up the attention.

“Ooo, I am so mad at those ponies who were yelling at you,” Steven grumbled to her. “You just tell me or someone else if it happens again!”

“Um… thanks. I think they were mostly just curious, but I don’t really like lots of creatures talking to me about being a, um, you know.” Her voice softened and she lowered into the water as she spoke, so the next word was just tiny glubs and bubbles rising from her mouth: “...changeling.”

“Well, then you shouldn’t have to put up with it,” Steven insisted. “...But, I’m glad I got a chance to see you again! I can just tell you have a phenomenal sense of style, and that makes you my kind of creature! Are you liking the events, besides the nastiness that just happened?”

“Yeah!” Ocellus answered, almost enthusiastically. “It’s a whole lot of stuff I’ve never seen or thought about! It’s really great to learn about it! Uh.” She frowned softly. “I don’t think I’ve figured out what I came here to figure out, though.”

“Ooooooo, a mission!” Steven clapped their claws in delight. “Well, you’re obviously very smart, so you’ll figure it out!”

“Hm, I don’t know.” Ocellus splished her flippers vaguely. “I’m starting to think I won’t. I’ve been trying to find out… what I am. You know, on the inside, about my… um, sexuality. And it’s really different from how changelings think about things, so it’s hard.”

“Oh, baby child!” Steven exclaimed, looking as if their heart was breaking. “It’s just terrible how queer creatures never can run out of ways their teenage years are awful! If it helps, pretty much everycreature you’ve seen all weekend has been through something like it. But I bet you can figure out what feels right for you!”

“Yeah. That’s sort of what my teachers said, um.” Ocellus gestured to Pinkie, who was now wearing the pirate costume and apparently improvising some kind of skit with the skeleton. “I don’t know. It’s frustrating.”

“Well, don’t force it! Forcing it will give you wrinkles, and you can still look good with wrinkles but you’d have to change your whole gestalt.”

“Oh no, but it’s important!” Ocellus insisted. “I need to figure this out now, because it matters for my friends! Especially, um... “ She trailed off.

Steven glowered. “Honey, if your friends don’t accept you, then…”

“No, it’s not that!” Ocellus interrupted, waving her flippers frantically. “I know they’d accept me! It’s just… I wasn’t really thinking about this, but then a few weeks ago, my friend Smolder visited me. She’s a dragon, and she goes to school with me. And… and she looked stressed out, and I asked why, and she said she wanted to talk to me alone, and when we were alone she said, ‘Okay, first of all, I’m pansexual.’” And I asked what that meant, and she explained about gender and everything, and I think I understood. So I said, ‘I acknowledge what you’ve told me.’”

“‘I acknowledge what you’ve told me?’”

“It’s… it’s what you’re supposed to do! You acknowledge the other creature’s feelings, right?” Stephen raised a meticulously trimmed eyebrow, but Ocellus kept going. “But then she got really weird, and she wouldn’t tell me any more! She tried to laugh it off, but… but I know her, and I could tell her feelings were hurt. And that’s because I didn’t say anything back, right? I was supposed to tell her what I am on the inside. But I didn’t know!”

“Oh, child,” Steven sighed. “Sweet baby infant neonate cherub.” They sighed again. “Oh innocent youngster lamb moppet...”

“Whaaat!” Ocellus wailed. “What do you know!? Tell me!”

“Ocellus.” Steven rested their chin on their elbow, regarding their tankmate with vague confusion. “Your friend visited you suddenly, was acting nervous around you, and took you aside to tell you two things… the first of which was that she liiiikes giiiirls. And then when you didn’t react enthusiastically, she didn’t tell you the second thing.”

“Well… not just girls!” Ocellus argued. “Pansexuality is a valid orientation!! But…. yes?”

Steven started to speak, then caught themselves. “Hm. I may be swimming out of line, here.” They called back to the pirate dancing on the solid part of the float. “Oh, Miss Pinkie Pie! I have a question!”

“Arr!”

“Is it all right if I tell dear little Ocellus that her friend Smolder has a crush on her?”

“Arrrrrrr! I hope so, matey, because ye just did!”

“Oh. So I did.” They shrugged, smiling widely. “Thanks, honey!”

Ocellus was, by this point, floating belly-up on the surface of the water, barely even hearing what was happening. She felt a claw poke her shoulder gently. “Oh, don’t be surprised! A cute changeling like you? What dragon wouldn’t snatch you right up? Um… not literally of course, you know what I mean.”

“But what do I do?!” Ocellus yelped, leaping out of the water as a pegasus. She hovered along next to Steven’s head, waggling her hooves wildly. “This… this would be even worse! Because, because before I just thought I couldn’t relate to anycreature else, but now I’m disappointing my best friend!”

“Aww. So you don’t like her back?”

“I don’t know! I can’t think about that until I know what I am!” Ocellus dropped into the water, a seapony again, just so she could swim in a tight, anxious circle. “Smolder deserves somecreature who is something that she can like, and can like her back. What if I’m not something that likes girl dragons?! That would be the saddest thing ever! Steven!” She wailed, beginning to cry. “That would make me so sad!”

Steven gently caught her by the shoulders; she kept her fins splashing, but she stayed in place. “Ocellus,” they said, oddly serious. “Honey, you know what I like to do sometimes? I like to just curl up underwater where no one can see me and just drift around. You know? It calms me down, and remember! Wrinkles!”

Ocellus’s vision was blurry, but Steven’s glorious moustache was something she could focus on. “Like… meditating?”

“Yes! Just being onnnnnne with the water!”

Ocellus nodded tearfully. “I… I can do that. I’ll be a jellyfish? They’re really good at drifting!”

“Eee!” Steven clapped with joy. “I told you you had style! Just try drifting around for a while! I’ll tell you when the parade’s over.”

Ocellus sniffled, the panic slightly muted. She couldn’t get Smolder’s face out of her head, but maybe not having a head would help. The last thing she heard before dipping beneath the surface was Pinkie yelling, “The real treasure was the skeletons we made along the way!” and then everything was just water.