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Seeking My Purpose In The World

by The Sleepless Beholder

Chapter 7: Chapter 7: What Happened?

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Sunset walked through the Everfree forest, digging two small stakes on the ground about six meters apart and tying them with a fine silver wire. She had been doing this all along the border of the Everfree and the town, and the only reason for such arduous work was that Pinkie, for whatever reason, had mentioned an ursa attack ‘next chapter’.
Now, Sunset didn’t know what a ‘chapter’ means in terms of time, but just to be sure, she started to make preparations from that day forward.
The silver wire was part of an alarm spell that would alert her if a creature exited the Everfree, which she assumed was the most logical place an ursa would come from.
She had two lines, one a couple meters inside the Everfree, and another just in the border, and between them she had prepared delayed-fireball spells in the ground, with enough power to hurt and persuade a big predator that attacking the town wouldn’t be a good idea.
She wasn’t sure that it would 100% work, but it was her best bet, and even if it failed, the alarm would give her time to call the princesses for reinforcements.
She was sure she and Twilight together could keep the beast away from the town, or maybe even push it back to wherever it came from.
Still, all this work was just in a hunch that the hyperactive pink mare had some kind of clairvoyance, so she preferred to not make a panic telling everypony in town.
If it happened, she would be ready, if it didn’t, she would just be tired.
Once the job was finally finished, she sat down and took a sip from the canteen she had brought and looked at the forest around her.
She found it oddly calming. Most ponies would be terrified by its many dangers, but Sunset was confident she could deal with whatever monster dared to attack her.
She took a moment to hear the genuine wild in the forest, so separated form pony’s control over the world. She could almost feel the natural untamed magic flowing here.
‘I guess that’s the reason the sisters built their castle here. A shame it’s now in shambles, it could be the center of a nice town if one could tame the forest,’ she thought before standing up and returning to the town, thinking on what she would do today.
She still had to make a strike in bowling, and the theater still didn’t have any event’s that she would be interested in.
‘Maybe I could ask Rarity about her offer with the spa. I would like some relaxing after working all morning.’
Suddenly, a booming voice came from the center of the town.

“Come one, come all, come and witness the magic of The Great and Powerful Trixie!”

Sunset’s eyes lit up with nostalgia. “Trixie?!”
She quickly ran into the center of town, finding a crowd surrounding a little trailer stage where a familiar blue unicorn was posing to the crowd.
Sunset teleported to the front, pushing Twilight and her friends aside. “Sorry.” She apologized before looking at the traveling magician.
She had to admit, the cape and witch hat fitted her more than-
“There's nothing wrong with being talented, is there?” Twilight asked to her friends, getting Sunset’s attention.

“Nothin' at all, 'cep'n when someone goes around showin' it off like a school filly with fancy new ribbons.” Applejack responded, looking at Trixie with some annoyance.

“You know it’s kind of her job to be boastful right?” Sunset interjected in the conversation.

Rarity turned towards Sunset. “She can’t go around calling herself better than others just because she can do lots of magic.”

Sunset frowned. “Uh, yes she can. Only Twilight and I have advanced magic studies. And she surely has more experience in magic than any other pony in this town besides us.”

“How can she be better when you have me around?” Rainbow asked with pride, gaining an eyeroll from everypony.

Their little bickering caused the magician to notice them, so she got closer to the end of the stage. “Well, well, well, it seems we have some neighsayers in the audience. Who is so ignorant as to challenge the magical ability of the Great and Powerful Trixie? Do they not know that they're in the presence of the most magical unicorn in all of Equestria?”

Rarity made a raspberry. “Just who does she think she is?”

Sunset looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “Somepony who performs for a living? Have any of you never been to an opera before? Rainbow you admire the Wornderbolts, why is this-” Sunset facehoofed as she saw the rainbow-haired pony get right into Trixie’s face.

“So, ‘Great and Powerful Trixie’. What makes you think you're so awesome, anyway?”

Trixie smiled. “Heh, why, only the Great and Powerful Trixie has magic strong enough to vanquish the dreaded ursa major!”

Sunset rolled her eyes with a smile. No unicorn could vanquish a thing like that, even dragons leave them alone.
Still, she admired the confidence that she had now. A far cry than the last time she saw her.

“Well then, I hereby challenge you, Ponyvillians. Anything you can do; I can do better. Any takers? Anyone? Hmm? Or is Trixie destined to be the greatest equine who has ever lived!?” the magician called out.

‘Maybe too much confidence,’ Sunset thought with a smile as she saw Trixie continue to challenge the townsfolk. Until Twilight got her attention.

“Hmm, how about you?” the magician asked, and Twilight looked really uncomfortable with being in the spotlight.

“Nah, she has nothing.” Sunset interjected, getting between Twilight and Trixie. “But this three, these are hecklers that need some demonstration.” She pushed the three mares with her magic, and the attention quickly went to them as each one challenged the magician in her own game.
Sunset turned to Twilight and whispered to her. “You better go back to the library before someone calls you out again.”

“But she’s better than her, you said it yourself.” Spike complained but was ignored by both unicorns before Twilight got him onto her back and trotted away.

Sunset returned her attention to the stage, where Trixie was beating every single mare with her magic, making them leave the stage with her as the undoubtable victor.
“Does anypony else want to challenge Trixie?” the magician called out, and Sunset smiled.

“May I give it a try?” she asked as she climbed up to the stage.

Trixie smiled with confidence. “Very well, what will you do then?”

“A little magic trick I saw a few years ago.” Sunset concentrated her magic, and an illusion made her look like a much younger version of Trixie, with a shorter, messier mane. Instead of the wizard hat and cape, this version of Trixie had a purple top hat with white stars glued to it, a simple purple vest, and white gloves.
The miniature magician had the most earnest smile as she talked to the audience. “Come one come all, to the great and powerful Trixie’s first grand show!”

The crowd smiled and cheered as the mini-Trixie started to do her show, finding her childish passion and the occasional well covered fluke in her acts as both funny and endearing.
However, the real Trixie could see from her position that the whole act was just Sunset projecting her memories in front of her, fooling the audience, but not her.
Once the mini-Trixie finished her act with a bow, Sunset canceled the memory and took its place, bowing to the audience in the same manner.
The crowd cheered, but Trixie was just looking at Sunset with an almost shocked expression.
When Sunset realized this, she quickly got nervous. “Sorry if it was inappropriate.”

“I-” Trixie shook her head, getting back into her persona. “Trixie wasn’t expecting to meet somepony form Canterlot who had seen her show. And even less in this town.”

Sunset smiled, relieved that the unicorn didn’t seem upset by her act. “Well, I’m glad I could meet you then. Your show was amazing for such a young age.”

“I-” Trixie cleared her throat. “It pleases Trixie that even in her amateur years she could leave such an impression on somepony.”

“It got me interested in illusion magic, although I never fully mastered it. I wanted to meet you in your next show, but I never saw you in Canterlot again after that.”

The magician tried to hide her face under her hat. “That’s a… complicated matter for Trixie.”

Sunset’s worry came back. “I’m sorry if I-”

Trixie stopped her with a hoof. “No worries, Trixie is glad to find a fan from so long ago.”

“This is cute and all, but aren’t you going to accept her challenge?” somepony in the crowd asked.

Trixie finally addressed the crowd gathered for her. “Trixie doesn’t see the point in challenging her own tricks, so the challenge is null and the shows over. Hope you all enjoyed it.”

The ponies weren’t too exited about it, but still they applauded and cheered for the show they had. As the magician was about to leave, Sunset walked up to her. “Would it be too forward to invite you for some coffee?”

Sunset could see the nervousness in the unicorn’s face. “Uhm, yes, of course. It would be private, right?”

Sunset smiled. “Yeah, no worries.”

“Then Trixie accepts. But she will need to pack the stage first, so, an hour or two?”

“It’s okay, I will meet you at Café Hay.”

After giving her the directions to the café, Sunset left the magician and walked back to her house, but was confronted by three angry mares in her way.

“Yah set us up!” Applejack accused her.

Sunset smiled. “And I hope you learned your lesson.”

“Oh, and what lesson would that be darling?” Rarity asked, adjusting the hat she wore to hide the green mane Trixie had given her when she tried to challenge the magician.

Sunset rolled her eyes. “Not being a heckler.”

“What’s a heckler?” Rainbow asked.

“Basically, somepony who is rude to ponies who entertain you for a living.”

“Ah don’t see how being a showoff is supposed to entertain me.”

Sunset’s frustration started to show on her face. “Applejack, you couldn’t see past your pride a couple days ago!”

“Sunset, that was uncalled-for!” Rarity interjected, showing her own annoyance at her words.

Sunset frowned, her eyes showing her escalation from simple frustration to searing anger. “How is the truth uncalled-for? I’ve been only helpful to you three and yet you still somehow find the guts to criticize me!”

Rainbow got right in front of Sunset. “I flew you to the hospital you ungrateful-”

“And I helped you mend your friendship with your griffon friend!” Sunset interrupted, getting right in Rainbow’s face.

The pegasus took a step back, confused. “You did?”

Sunset smiled in a way that unnerved the three mares. “Oh right. I forgot you’ve the awareness of a newborn cub. I don’t know why I even bother.” Before any of the three could say another word, Sunset teleported away.

“That girl has a few loose screws,” Applejack said frowning at the scorched spot where the unicorn previously stood.

“She seemed so nice at first,” Rarity added with a little bit of worry.

Rainbow made a raspberry. “Whatever, as long as she doesn’t rub it off on Twilight.”

“Yah think that’s the reason why Twilight is so shy and reclused?”

“Well, honestly we don’t know much about Sunset. Just that she’s kind of a sister to Twilight. I think we should get her opinion first. Maybe there’s a reason she’s like this.” Rarity concluded.

The other two mares nodded and started to walk towards Twilight’s library.


Sunset reached the café and sat down in her usual spot. Looking around, she noticed the establishment was almost completely devoid of clients.
“Having a slow day?” she asked Savoir Fare.

The waiter shrugged; his usual professionally uninterested expression unchanged. “Happens from time to time. It’s better than if they come and leave without paying. You will have the usual I suppose.”

“I’m actually expecting somepony, so I will call you when she arrives.”

“Very well.” Savoir Fare was about to leave, but Sunset stopped him.

“Can I ask you a weird question?” she asked with some nervousness that got the attention of the waiter.

“Can’t be more weird than what I’m used to.” He sat down opposite of her, and Sunset took a moment to choose her words carefully.

“Have you ever felt that your actions get unnoticed, or that things would’ve played out fine regardless of them? Kind of like you’re inconsequential to the world?”

Savoir Fare took a moment to think an answer. “You mean like you are in the background instead of the center of the stage?”

Sunset’s eyes lit up at the better analogy to her question. “Exactly.”

“I can’t say I have.” Sunset’s excitement fell. “Honestly, I wouldn’t like to be in the stage at all. Even if I don’t show it often, I’m happy with my role right now, having this café and keeping it up and running despite adversity.”

“I can’t say I get it. I can’t see myself in any other way than trying to get the main role in the show.”

“And what would that main role be?” Savoir asked curiously.

Sunset couldn’t respond right away; it took her a few seconds. “As ruler of Equestria I guess.”

The waiter gave a chuckle. “I certainly wouldn’t want that kind of responsibility. And I guess you’ve the means to reach that kind of goal?”

Sunset looked to the side. “Not exactly. Just a promise, and a teacher that I’m still unsure how she feels about me, or I to her. But I know that I’ve the potential to be something greater than just the background.”

“Well, the only thing I can give you is coffee, and wish you good luck with it.” Savoir stood up and walked away, leaving Sunset with more questions than before.
Suddenly, the alarm spell activated in her head, but it wasn’t the one inside the Everfree, something was leaving the town into-

“The trap!” Sunset screamed, teleporting herself to the forest and looking around in desperation, seeing two colts walking straight towards the explosive spells. “Wait!” she called out, but the spell was already about to be unleashed.
Having no other option, Sunset teleported herself in front of the colts and used her magic to minimize the spell.
The explosion, even with its potency reduced, was enough to send Sunset flying into the air, getting lost between the trees.

“What was that?” one of the colts wondered, confused at the sudden explosion in front of them.

“I don’t know. This place is weird,” the other colt responded.

“Let’s get that ursa quickly so we can return home and watch Trixie defeat it.”

“Yeah.”

They both resumed their march towards the deeper parts of the Everfree, activating the second alarm spell, but Sunset couldn’t hear it in her unconscious state.


Sunset slowly woke up with a huge headache. She touched the back of her head and felt a painful bump hidden behind her mane.
“I hope the colts are okay. I should’ve taken a less violent approach to the ursa thing.” She then noticed that it was already night. “Oh, crap.”
She summoned her wings and flew into the sky, changing her eyes and ears to thestrals so she could deduce what was happening in the town.
Her worries were confirmed as she saw an ursa minor walking into Ponyville. “Oh no, I’ve to warn the princesses.”
Sunset summoned a parchment, but before she could write down her warning, a booming step called her attention. She looked back and saw the immense figure of an ursa major approaching the edge of the Everfree. The huge beast looked at Ponyville and let out a growl that might as well had been a scream for Sunset.
“I suppose you’re looking for your kid,” the unicorn said with fear in her eyes. She used the animal-speaking spell to call out to the beast. “Listen, we will give you your kid back, this must be a misunderstanding.” The huge stellar bear didn’t seem to notice her and was about to continue its march towards the town.
Sunset used the royal Canterlot voice to try and be heard, repeating the same message. “WE WIL GIVE YOU YOUR KID BACK, THIS MUST BE A MISSUNDERSTANDING.”
The ursa major finally noticed the flying bat-pony hybrid and frowned, apparently still unable to hear Sunset’s voice completely enough to understand her.
“Please, I don’t want to-” Sunset had to teleport away as a paw the size of a house almost slapped her out of the air. “Fine, we will do this the hard way!” she screamed, trying to give herself some bravery, but it failed.
Sunset started to fly around the beast’s body, trying to keep herself behind it so it’s attacks couldn’t reach her easily, but it was pretty fast for its size and could turn around faster than she could fly. The impressive size also made her unable to fully dodge the attacks, having to teleport constantly to avoid being hit, which added to the magic she had to spent to keep herself in the air was starting to get too taxing. She couldn’t do this forever.
However, Sunset’s worries where more about Ponyville. Even if it was a minor, it could devastate the town if it decided to, and her only hope was that Twilight could figure out a way to make it return with its parent.
Sunset started to fly away from the ursa major, trying to kite it away from the town, but the creature didn’t follow, and instead took another step towards the town.
Sunset teleported in front of the beast and fired a magic blast to try and catch its attention so it would chase her. The ray of magic hit the beast right in the snout, but it only seemed to piss it off. “That was a bad idea.”
The ursa major roared, and Sunset closed her eyes and screamed in pain as her sensible thestral ears bled from the intense noise.
When the roar stopped, Sunset opened her eyes, seeing the world in a blur and unable to hear anything. It was impossible for her to avoid the huge paw speeding towards her.


The ursa major hit the flying pest, sending it to the ground, forming a small crater with the impact. It then raised its foot, ready to reduce the body into a stain on the ground, but something caught its attention.
Its cub was floating towards her, drinking milk from a water tower.
The ursa quickly forgot about the pest and grabbed its cub, holding it lovingly in its arms, and slowly made its way back to their cave.


“Oh little sun, broken again? How much will you sacrifice for this so called ‘friends’? Is being this ‘fairy godmother of friendship’ really worth it? Wouldn’t you be happier following your dreams instead of sacrificing yourself over others?
You don’t need them; they only anger you. We’re above them, they should respect us, and if respect is not granted… let them fear the nightmarish hellfire inside you.
Now rest little sun, I will mend your wounds, for a price, and you will forget me, for now.
Goodbye.”


Sunset woke up, feeling like her head was a pincushion full of nails.
She slowly stood up, her body responding perfectly well, but her mind was scattered to the four winds, making every step a challenge of coordination.
She lifted her head up, and the bright sun hurt her eyes, making her recoil in pain and seek shelter in the shadows of the forest.
‘What happened last night? Who saved me form the ursa? Was it Twilight?’
Her mind too exhausted to work, Sunset decided to just return to the town and rest. She fumbled her way out of the Everfree and found a small cottage which had a fence for some animals. She got closer to it, seeing a water trough at the side of the fence.
She almost ran to it, scaring the animals around it, and dove her entire head inside, taking some big gulps that helped to ease her pain.

“Sunset?” sounded the familiar voice of Spike, and the unicorn lifted her head from the water, her mane covering her eyes, which helped her bear the light of the sun. “What are you doing?”

“Forget about it,” she simply said. “Tell me what happened last night.”

“Oh, it was awesome!” The unicorn had a sudden urge to strangle him. “Twilight managed to easily return an ursa minor to the Everfree!” Sunset gave a sigh of relief. At least the town was safe. “And you should’ve seen the face on Trixie’s face when Twilight showed how much of a boastful farce she was.” Spike’s smile started to banish as he saw the water dripping from Sunset’s head start to evaporate. “Sunset?”

“Where are they?” she asked, and even if Spike couldn’t see her eyes through her mane, he could feel the intensity of her stare, making him nervous.

“Uhm, they are in the mountains, they are going to stop a dragon from covering Equestria in a cloud of smoke.” Spike jumped back as Sunset unfurled her wings and she took off before he could say anything else.
He watched her fly towards the mountains, and he couldn’t stop felling worried for Twilight.
Spike knew of Sunset’s short temper, but he had never seen her so angry before, and with a dragon involved…
“Maybe I should tell Celestia.”


Sunset flew to the top of the mountain where the smoke was coming from, her hair completely dry and eyes squinting in the light. It was a relief when the cloud finally shielded her sight from the scorching ball of flame in the sky.
Now that she could see more clearly, she investigated the mountain in search for the ponies she wanted to confront. She knew her seething anger would not be calmed until she-
Sunset’s train of though derailed when she saw Twilight and her friends being blasted into a rock by a dragon’s breath of smoke.
Her anger redirected, she landed on top of the dragon’s cave and lifted a heavy rock before sending it down on the lizard’s head, calling his attention away from the mares. The dragon looked at her with confusion and annoyance as he rubbed his head.
“I will give you to the count of three to leave this mountain,” she declared, but the lizard simply took some air, ready to blast her with his breath.
Before he could exhale, a large ray of cyan magic shot out of Sunset’s horn, pushing his head into the ground.
Sunset smiled as she saw the dragon pinned under her power, she felt as if a huge weight was being lifted off her shoulders, she felt like this was what she always deser-

“Stop!” came a soft yet firm voice, snapping Sunset out of her trance, ending her spell. “How can you hurt a creature like that?!” Sunset looked at the dragon, cowering in fear, it’s head heavily burnt, which was quite the accomplishment due to its fire-resistant scales. “You’re no different from Nightmare Moon!” Sunset finally looked at the source of the voice and found the normally extremely shy yellow pegasus looking at her with fierce eyes. “You intimidated the poor manticore when we traveled to the castle of the two sisters. You lied to Twilight. You attacked a griffon in the middle of the town. You defended that boastful magician that humiliated my friends. You’re mean, and a bully, and-” Fluttershy stopped as she realized she could see the heat radiating off the unicorn she was chastising.

“See little sun? They only judge you.”

Rainbow positioned herself between Fluttershy and Sunset in a protective manner.

“They fear you. They call you horrible things.”

Rarity and Applejack got closer, ready to fight her, while Pinkie simply stood behind, alongside the dragon that seemed more scared of her now.

“Why should you endure it? Wouldn’t it be easy to just remove the problem?”

Twilight appeared at her side but had to take a few steps back to shield herself from the heat. Her lips moved, but Sunset could only hear one voice; the one in her mind.

“Let go little sun, let the fire of your anger speak for itself.”

Sunset screamed, making everyone step back. “I… I died.” she said looking at the two pegasus. “Two times. To protect you.” She looked at Applejack and Rarity. “I solved your problems… getting nothing in return.” She finally looked at Twilight, seeing the tears running down her face. “And you took my place.” Sunset charged up her horn, and everyone around her started to flee.
Except Twilight.
She walked towards Sunset, enduring the heat cooking her skin, trying to talk to her, but Sunset still couldn’t hear her.

“Take your rightful place in Equestria. Become its new ruler!”

Sunset looked at Twilight, who was being pulled into the air by Rainbow so they could escape.

“Do it now! Before she escapes!”

Sunset closed her eyes, concentrating on the spell… and teleported herself away from the mountain.


Sunset appeared atop the river where Twilight had found the sea serpent and dived into it.
The water quickly started to boil, but it helped to contain the heat until it started to subside, and before she ran out of air, she felt calm once more.
Sunset tried to lift her head out of the water, but her body didn’t respond.

“You disappoint me little sun.”

Sunset started to panic, the little oxygen she still had vanishing in her lungs.

“I give you all the power I’ve managed to gather until now, and you just waste it in a simple tantrum!”

Sunset’s lungs started to fill with water, and she had flashbacks to the first time she died.

“Maybe I should just seek a new host. One who can maintain their eyes on what’s important.”

Sunset’s vision started to go dark, her strength leaving her for the third time.

“You’re a disappointment little-”

Suddenly, something pulled Sunset by her mane, taking her out of the water.

“You got lucky little sun. Forget about us once more.”

Sunset started to vomit the water out of her lungs, wishing that she wouldn’t have to experience it a third time.

“Pony with hair of flame and sun in flank. You were quite lucky I was by the riverbank.” Sunset turned her head to the voice of her savior, and to her surprise, she saw a zebra. “I don’t want to ignore your turmoil. But could you explain how the river boiled?” Sunset weakly tried to stand up by herself, but the zebra had to help her. “If talking now it’s not the best. We can go to my hut so you can rest.” Sunset tried to give her an answer, but her brain decided that passing out was a better option.


Zecora laid down Sunset on her hammock and took a closer look at the pony that she had just saved.
She didn’t appear to have been damaged by the boiling water, and she noticed that her coat was drier than hers.
“This pony must have the soul of a fire-starter.” Zecora opened one of Sunset’s eyes, seeing the bat-like pupil staring at her. “But it seems that there’s also something darker.”
The zebra went to her ingredients, quickly picking some before taking a large book she had hidden in one corner. She searched through the pages until she found the recipe she wanted and took some more ingredients before filling her cauldron with water and starting a fire.
It took her an hour to finish the brew, and once it was done, she took some of it into a cup before going back to Sunset. She pushed the cup carefully against her lips, making sure none of it spilled out, and waited until the pony finished swallowing the concoction.
Zecora checked her eyes once more and smiled as they slowly returned back to normal.
“Your body will be calm with this brew. But for the poison in your mind, I must find something new.” The zebra turned around to search for another book, but got tackled to the ground.
Sunset was still unconscious, but her body moved on its own, jumping towards the cauldron and knocking it over, spilling its contents on the floor.
Zecora tried to restrain her possessed guest, but the unconscious unicorn could still use her magic, and teleported herself outside of the hut.
Before the zebra could see her, she summoned her wings and flew into the air, quickly getting lost in the night sky.

Author's Notes:


Sunset's condition has worsened: Nightmarish essence (minor)

Magic Control: –10

Sunset's morale went down!: -60
Current morale: -45/100


As I said in the blog, future chapters may take time to be completed, I hope to bring the next one soon.

I will be watching you.

PS: would you like more art like the mini-Trixie in future chapters?

Next Chapter: Chapter 8: "Hello" Estimated time remaining: 8 Hours, 60 Minutes
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