Minotaur

I entered the labyrinth after tying off one end of the ball of yarn to a small sapling outside the door. I entered, not knowing if I would see my beloved Ariadne again. How little did I know what I would encounter while inside the structure.

I followed the wall to my left. I had been given a torch but decided to abandon it. The torch would only make me an easy target to the beast I was about to face. I needed my eyes to adjust to the dark as well as the beast’s had.

I don’t know how long I was in there. Time was useless to me even though I assumed I had so little. The wall was mossy and crumbling beneath my fingers. The darkness almost blinded me and caused me to lose all sense of direction. I was careful to make no noise though. I kept my sword ready. The monster could have struck me at any moment. I hoped something as large as the creature I heard of would make some noise before it it could kill me. I kept my breathing even to steady my heart so I could listen for any sound.

Honestly, I just wasn’t prepared for what I encountered at the center of the labyrinth.

I noticed after what must have been hours and countless dead ends that the walls were becoming visible. As soon as I saw the light I began to hear speaking. It was faint, indecipherable, at first but became clearer as I neared the center.

A booming voice commanded the tunnels and echoed to the point that I was nearly deafened. I hid against the wall as soon as I saw the doorway to a bright torch lit room.

“That's no joke, friends. Iron Will is so confident that you will be one hundred percent satisfied with Iron Will's assertiveness techniques, that if you are not even half satisfied...”

A bleat interrupted him,

“What do you mean 'it doesn’t work'? Iron will says it works...”

Another bleat.

“Hey hey hey, do not interrupt Iron Will... He doesn't take interruption kindly, remember the incident at Pan’s a few weeks back?”

This creature was familiar with the god Pan himself! But... the bleating? It sounded like goats. How could goats hold a conversation with him? How could they possibly understand each other?

“All righ’ all righ’ how about this: if you are not one hundred percent satisfied, you. Pay. Nothing.” the voice said grudgingly. A bleat that sounded like approval followed.

“But I pity the fool who doubts Iron Will's methods!” he added, provoking a series of bleats that seemed to argue with each other.

The shadow of the minotaur was cast on the wall I could see. What was all this about paying and... “methods” for... assertiveness? I heard wood creak as I saw the shadow sit down. I knew I would have to defeat this monster... but how?

“So!” it barked suddenly, clapping its hands, “Let Iron Will figure this out: Iron Will’ll use the secret passage he put in and find a new place--a WHOLE new place-- and start over! Once Iron Will convinces the king that he can be a success as a motivational speaker... BOOM! Iron Will is OUTTA HERE!” he bellowed so loudly I was driven to my knees and dropped my sword with a clang.

I cannot tell how suddenly my heart stopped. The shadow slowly stood up.

“Is someone out there again?” it called. I grabbed my sword of course and charged into the room, expecting to fight it...

I wasn’t expecting to trip over a goat...

“Now, are you going to take that lying down?” it demanded, standing over me. I... could not conceive what it spoke of and inquired.

“Now are you going to let that goat just walk away like that?”

“I... tripped over him.” I said, picking up my sword.

“Because he got in your WAY!” it shouted at me and I dropped my sword to cover my ears again, pulling my foot away in time to avoid being injured by the falling blade.

“What do you mean he got in my way? I barged in here and tripped over him...”

“But he took you down! He took you down so make him frown!....no that sounds just silly...” it mused and turned its back to me. I would have struck it but another goat had taken my sword away and was chewing on it.

“Hey... um... Goat? Could you give that back please?” I asked the goat politely. It just baa’d.

“Ignore them they’re just my managers.”

“Managers? Like your... Master?”

“NO!” it bellowed again, “Iron Will is the only Master of Iron Will!” it declared, flexing.

The minotaur... was not what I expected. Yes, it was huge, bovine, loud and intimidating... but it was my height, somewhat clumsy and had a coat of ... light blue. It seemed more like a young adult than a monster from its... mannerisms. Always trying to sound better than itself... talking about itself as if it was come great object of wonder.

“So, what brings you to Iron Will’s home?”

"What is this 'Iron Will'? Why do you call yourself that instead of referring to yourself?”

“Iron Will...” it said, smacking its chest, “Is Iron Will!” Try as I might I could not comprehend what it meant.

At this point the goats had consumed my sword and were beginning to feast on the tapestries hanging around the circular room.

“Hey! Hey! Hey! What did I tell you guys? No chewing Iron Will’s decor!”

If only I could pen what I felt at that moment... I was sent into the labyrinth to fight to the death. How many of my countrymen had died... to this? This... pubescent monster who was fretting over decorations and speaking to goats? It wasn’t fearsome at all... just... disappointing. I had expected a fearsome beast to bellow and charge at me... not tell me to yell at a goat because I tripped over it. What would Ariadne think of me?

“Could you please tell me something?” I implored.

“Yeah? What can Iron Will do for you?”

“Tell me one thing, beast: how many have you killed here?”

“Killed?”

“Yes... killed? How many like me? Who had... swords at one point?” I said, giving the now sleeping pile of goats a glance.

“Hey, I never... Iron Will never killed no one!” it said, holding its large hands up in defense.

“What kind of a minotaur are you!?” I exclaimed, rashly, “You’re pitiful! You spend all day talking to goats and worrying about becoming a... motiv... whatever it was! Are you even all that dangerous or is talking your only weapon?”

I regretted my words as soon as I said them. Immediately his massive jaws were open and bellowing in my face, causing me to fall backwards into the stone floor, uncushioned by moss.

“What kind of minotaur? Iron Will is THE minotaur you little...”

“Am I interrupting?” a smooth, new voice spoke. I looked up to see a strange man. He wore no toga and his clothes were much too strange and warm for the island of Crete. Where had he come from? I was lying in the doorway of the only door to the room and yet he was standing against the opposite wall as if he had just walked in. A glass orb was floated and rolled over his hands as he gave me a look of revulsion.

“What is that thing cowering on your floor?”

“A visitor, Jareth... he was just leaving...” the minotaur explained... well... lied... except about leaving. I crawled backwards through the door.

“Well, let him go. I have something I must discuss with you.”

“What’s that, King Jareth?” the minotaur asked, bowing his face to the floor.

“Oh, quit groveling! Have you been trying to motivate my goblins again?” the man said in a voice that was pleasent with a hint of disdain and threat.

“No, no I haven’t. Not since last time...”

I didn’t stay to listen. I quickly found the yarn trail I dropped outside the door and followed it outside. I made up another story which I shall tell to everyone I meet. Of how I faced the minotaur and lived.

For this story, I hope that the writing of it will allow me to forget the events that transpired in the labyrinth. I hope this paper is only found long after I’m dead or never found at all.

Iron Will avoided all questions when asked about his encounter with Theseus and the mystery king named Jareth.