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The Seven Trials of Mi Amore Cadenza

by TheDriderPony

Chapter 3: The Trial of the Scepter

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The Trial of the Scepter

'Such marvelous spellwork. Darkened Peridot was truly a mare ahead of her time.'

Cadance fought the urge to turn to her left where Luna's voice was coming from, since she knew there was nothing there save for the side of the train. Smacking her muzzle into the rail three times had been more than enough negative reinforcement to make the lesson stick.

‘Look at this bit here,’ came the voice of Sunburst on her equally-empty right side, 'Doesn't this look like a proto-version of the Farrier's Transform? That shouldn't be discovered for another three hundred years!’

'Indeed Truly a genius.'

"Sunburst, Aunt Luna," Cadance said quietly. There was a certain trick to talking with ponies hundreds of miles away while also not looking like a madmare talking to herself on a train. Cadance did not quite have the knack, and thus had the surrounding four rows of seats to herself. This helpfully also solved the problem that had created it. "Not that I mind listening to you two discuss magical theory, but it's hard to focus when you keep making visual references that I can't see."

'Oh! Right! Sorry Princess,’ the ghostly voice of Sunburst apologized into her ear.

"It's fine, just keep me in mind."

A mare several seats away gave her a strange look and decided she'd be better off another two rows up.

As it turned out, the Diadem (and presumably the other artifacts) had another ability which Luna had been unaware of. Once they became magically activated, ponies with either artifact could communicate with each other over great distances. Thus, despite being on a west-bound train, Cadance could hear her Aunt and Wizard as easily as if she were standing around the Crystal Heart alongside them.

This did have the slight effect of making her look like she was talking to herself if she wasn't careful, but it was still a far more efficient method than traditional mail or even dragonfire post.

'Can you give me an update on your position?’

Back on the other side of the connection, Starburst spread out a map of Equestria across his makeshift workspace. The Crystal Heart hovered nearby (thanks to Princes Luna's skill with illusions, they could tinker with a national treasure in peace while a magical construct kept its pedestal warm), occasionally speaking in the voice of his sovereign.

'We just passed the border of Palomino Valley. Compass reading is...' Cadance paused, presumably to line up the compass' arrow with the beam of light emitted by her headgear, 'Seventy degrees North of west.'

Starburst determined that now was not a prudent time to inform her that the standard reading of that should have been twenty degrees West of North. He understood what she meant anyway. Taking a straightedge, he marked her position on the tracks and drew a thick line following the vector given by the Diadem. The spell didn't offer pinpoint accuracy, but as the ink of his quill intersected with three other lines, he had a pretty good idea where Cadance needed to go.

"Alright," he said as he consulted a copy of the train schedule. "You're going to need to get off two stops from now and take the Brass line North."

'More measurements?' her voice asked through the Heart, 'Or do I finally have a destination?'

"From what I gather," spoke Luna as she took in the map and circled where the lines intersected, "Your destination is set. Though I fear to send you to such a den of iniquity and vice."

'Don't tell me it's back in the Canterlot Nobles' District?'

"No, but I'm sure you'll spot plenty of nobles there easily enough. You're headed to Las Pegasus."


Cadance had never before been to Las Pegasus.

It wasn't that she hadn't wanted to —what foal doesn't want to go to the playground in the sky after they hear about it?— but rather circumstances had always seemed against it.

For one thing, it was well known that Princess Celestia was not exactly fond of the place. Though she strove to remain fair and impartial in all her rulings, she was still just a pony, and small biases always managed to creep into her opinions. Whether the cause was the addicting habits the city promoted, its heightened crime rate, or the fact that half of the alumnal body of her magic school had been banned at some point or another, no one could say. In any event, it was not the sort of place she'd been eager for a young and impressionable princess-to-be to visit.

Time and again she had attempted to pass laws and reforms restricting the viceful city, and time after time they'd been voted down. This was partially due to it being such a powerful economic hub —not to mention an international tourist hotspot— Las Pegasus wielded political clout equal to cities twice its age and size. Not to mention it had the backing of no shortage of nobles, both young and old alike.

It was thus with fresh eyes that Cadance took in Equestria's premier hotspot for gambling, nightlife, and exotic entertainment.

From the neon-lit towers in the everlasting twilight beneath the clouds, to the family-friendly theme parks and hotels that topped them, the city radiated pleasure and grandiosity like a fat noble turned stone and cloud.

It was also excessively large. Worryingly so. With as many buildings as Canterlot packed into a footprint as small as Ponyville, even with a magic aid pointing her in the right direction Cadance started to worry how she’d ever find the next relic. Especially when her research team still didn’t know what it looked like.

“Where to start in a city this big,” Cadance asked into a large sheet of paper that intentionally obscured most of her vision. She’d bought herself a map —for an purse-gougingly excessive fifteen bits— so that, as long as she phrased herself correctly, her comments to her home base would look less like a crazy mare and more like somepony just distractedly thinking out loud.

'I'm not sure we'll be able to help you much,' Starburst said, 'I don't have any maps of the city.'

'I may have an idea,' Luna suggested, 'Do they still teach Spell Shock's Caster Coordinator?'

Cadance frowned. She recognized the spell, if by name only, though not from her magic classes. "Isn't that a military spell?"

'Indeed. But its usefulness extends far beyond mere combat. In the field, if one had good knowledge of another spellcaster's magic, it allowed commanders to easily locate and organize their battlemages even in the chaos of battle.'

Sunburst began making noises of confusion, but Cadance tuned him out, having already grasped her Aunt's meaning. Even if the Diadem was inaccurate at this distance, it was not the only way to track magic.

The Crystal Empire's unique brand of emotion-based magic was not an inherent ability of their race. Anyone could learn it with enough time and focus. However that did not mean that it was easy. Most ponies would find it difficult to focus on and absorb themselves in a single pure emotion at a time, rather than experience the gambit of multi-faceted emotion they were used to.

Suffice to say, there were very few sources, let alone practitioners, outside of the Empire itself.

While her advisers continue to bicker at the edge of her hearing, Cadance found an unoccupied bench, sat down, and closed her eyes.

Perhaps she was biased being born a pegasus, but Cadance was of the belief that a pegasus gaining a horn was a much more profound change than a unicorn gaining wings.

Not that she was disparaging wings —she'd owned and appreciated a pair of her own for many years, after all— but rather that it simply couldn't be compared to gaining magic. Gaining a horn was like acquiring both a new limb and a host of new senses all at once. Like putting on a pair of glasses and seeing all the colors and patterns she'd only glanced past before.

With wings, one gained the ability to fly and control the weather. But a horn offered so much more. There was a reason that there were advanced schools for unicorns and not pegasi. It was simply too much to figure out alone. Even after having a horn for nearly a third of her life, Cadance still sometimes forgot that magic was an option she could use.

She concentrated and tried to focus on her magic sense. It wasn't easy, but the spell resonated well with the Crystal Empire magic she'd worked so hard to cultivate.

Countless patches of magic lit up in her mind's eye, pulsing and shifting like afterimages from a bright light. One for each and every pony and magic item in the vicinity. Slowly, she tuned out the ones she knew were wrong. First the thrumming low notes of earth pony magic. Then the rapid, flighty pulses from the pegasi. Unicorn magic was trickier, far less uniform than the others, but with a bit of extra effort it too faded out.

This left her with only a few dozen signatures, opposed to the hundreds or even thousands she'd started with. Strange and unfamiliar magic from creatures visiting from afar, ancient magics in relics and antiques, and three signatures that held a familiar chill. She wasn't nearly skilled enough to identify them, but she'd lived long enough in the Crystal Empire to recognize its unique magic.

Now all she had to do was close in on the sources and identify which was a touristing pony and which was an ancient lost artifact.

As she dismissed her magesight, the light, noise, and above all smell of Las Pegasus came rushing back to her full force. She staggered for a moment before regaining her bearings. The path that had only a moment ago seemed so clear was once again clogged with bodies.

Maybe she'd have been better off putting in the effort in learning how to teleport after all.


The first two sources were a bust. One was a crystal pony who —unlike his mildly xenophobic brethren— had decided to venture forth and explore the new world of the future. The second was a unicorn who'd actually managed to learn crystal magic and was using it to cheat at cards to amplify his opponent's tells.

So it was with a mixture of relief and frustration that Cadance walked into a large plaza atop one of Las Pegasus's tallest cloud-levels. The voices chattering in either ear certainly didn't help.

'Yes, but there was a record of you receiving the Diadem. Las Pegasus wasn't even founded until well after the Empire was lost.'

'Which is exactly my point, if you'd just listen. It may only be in the city at the moment, perhaps as a family heirloom in the pocket of some noble or visiting dignitary.'

'A pocket?! Please excuse my tone, your highness, but what kind of logic is that? None of the artifacts we know of are remotely small enough to fit in a pocket, and-'

'That we know of. And that wasn't my point.'

Cadance did her best to ignore them as she scanned the plaza. It was close, wherever and whatever it was. It shouldn't be hard to spot. Assuming it followed the design pattern of the other two (and the Empire as a whole) it'd be something made of blue crystal.

'And another thing!'

"Aunt Luna, Sunburst," Cadance cut in. "I think I've found it."

Much like one of those optical illusion images popular in the back pages of foals comics, once she’d seen the hidden image, it was hard not to notice it. At the center of the plaza was a large fountain. In the center of the fountain stood the statue of an old stallion. Clutched in that stallion’s hoof, raised high to the sky, was a crystal rod, intricately carved, which practically glowed to the eye that knew what to look for.

“Well, that was easy. Now all I have to do is find who owns it so I can-”

“Princess Cadance!”

She flinched as a strikingly accented voice cut through the air. Never before had her own name felt so much like an icepick in her ears. Much to her dismay, it continued.

"Why, Princess Cadance, as I live and breathe! I have to say, I mean I have to say, it is an honor and a pleasure to have you visit my most humble establishment. If I had known you were coming, I'd have rolled right out the red carpet.”

The voice spilled into Cadance's ears like oil, pooled around her brain and oozed out the other side. She felt filthy for just having heard it. It took but a moment to turn and focus on the source of the contagion.

The stallion approached her with purposeful gait. It was less of a walk and more like any progress he made was an unintended side effect of thrusting himself forward with each step. His smile gleamed nearly as brightly as his mane, which was slicked and coiffed with enough grease to warrant a fire hazard. Every facet of his being oozed confidence and self-assuredness. It set Cadance's hackles to rising.

He bowed low as he reached her, far lower than royal courtesy called for. "Gladmane, owner and sole proprietor of this, I say, of this little slice of heaven.”

His tone sounded surprised and supplicant, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. Cadance regarded him carefully. Whatever his game, she would have to tread cautiously. "Mister Gladmane. Thank you for your welcome. It's a pleasure to be here."

"I assure you, your highness, the pleasure is mine." He smiled, and Cadance felt that the upkeep of his teeth alone probably kept most of the local dentists in business. She could almost see her reflection in them. "I apologize for the lack of a proper reception. Somepony on my staff must have mislaid the announcement of your impending arrival."

With every word Cadance was growing to like this Gladmane less and less. He was neither a noble nor a salespony yet somehow managed to embody the worst traits of each.

“Never mind it,” she bluffed, “These things happen. And I’ve appreciated being able to walk the streets unaccompanied for a time.” A sneaky thought occurred to her. It wasn’t the most… princessly of actions, but up against a stallion like this, she felt justified. “Though now that you’re here, perhaps there is a way you could be of service.”

A small glint of irritation flashed in his eyes for a moment before vanishing. Good, she wanted him off his game. All the more advantage it’d give her. “Why, anything for a princess of Equestria.” He paused. “Or, I suppose, would that be the Crystal Empire now?”

“Both titles apply,” she said smoothly. Rule number one of Celestia’s guide to dealing with troublesome nobles: Don’t let them forget who's in charge. She looked down her nose and made a point to overemphasize her words as royally as possible. “I find myself taking an interest in this statue. Perhaps you could tell me about it.”

She didn’t like taking this kind of attitude, but he was clearly a stallion who wasn’t going to help out of the goodness of his heart.

“That? Why, that’s Gladmane the first, my great-grandpappy. He was there when they were first carving the beginnings of a town outta this strip of land. Built one of the first casinos as well.”

“How interesting,” she lied. “And such a well-made likeness as well. Though the scepter seems to clash with the rest.”

“You’ve a keen eye, Princess,” Gladmane smirked, “Let me tell you, that’s no ordinary hunk of crystal. My great-grandpappy won that off an old buffalo shaman in a game of cards; the very same game in which he won the land on which he built his first casino. Used it as collateral to get his first construction loans. Even at the time it was considered unfathomably old.”

She weighed her options. She could always just demand that he hand it over. Claim it in the name of the preservation of national history. Very few ponies wouldn't crumble before a royal edict. But what kind of precedent would that be setting? Did she really want to be known as the kind of princess who forced ponies to give up family heirlooms (questionable transaction histories notwithstanding)? And Gladmane was clearly a pony with connections. The kind of pony who would talk, at length, about his meeting with a princess. No matter how it went.

The only way to win this encounter would be if Gladmane chose to give up the Scepter of his own free will.

Cadance was reminded suddenly of a mare she’d once known well. Somepony who she’d been far from friends with, but from whom she’d unintentionally learned quite a good deal. Her methods weren’t the cleanest, but given the circumstances, she felt it was her only chance at success.

"Let me ask you, Gladmane, are you a gambling stallion?"

He smiled, once again showing far too many teeth. "Hard to make a living in this business and not be."

She nodded. "Of course. Now, given the knowledge that that staff is immeasurably old, of uncertain history, and made of a rather particular blue crystal, what would you say the odds are that it came from the Crystal Empire?"

His smile did not diminish. If anything it grew wider. "Why, I hadn't thought of that! To think my family owned such a prestigious piece of history." He chuckled throatily. "I can imagine such a thing would belong in a museum, and I'd be happy to donate it to the Crown. Though, of course, I would expect my family to be suitably compensated for the loss of such valued, dare I say iconic, heirloom."

"I wasn't finished," Cadance interrupted, her voice hard, "Given the circumstances, what do you think the are odds that it's one of Sombra's Dark relics?"

The smile froze on his face and his cocky posture cracked slightly. "...Come again?"

"Sombra's Dark artifacts," she repeated as though he were hard of hearing, "Enchanted crystals he left behind in order to lock his soul to this plane and aid in his resurrection attempts."

'Is this true? Why wasn't I informed?' Thankfully, Luna had apparently learned the value of whispering so Cadance could barely hear her (and Gladmane certainly couldn't).

'I think she's making it up.'

Sunburst was only half right. While she was spouting bald-faced lies, the concept itself she was glibly cribbing from one of Shining Armor's roleplaying campaigns. The fictional lich's actions fit Sombra's tactics surprisingly well, so long as Cadance remembered to call him Sombra and not Harold the Necromancer.

She stepped closer to Gladmane, taking full advantage of her height to loom over him like a specter of doom (which was not an easy feat with a coat the color of cotton candy).

He loosened the collar of his rhinestoned jacket, for what little benefit it did him. "I- I hadn't, I say I hadn't heard anything about that, y-your highness."

"Of course you wouldn't have," she said airily, channeling the pomp and tone of the haughty noble mares from high school, "this is all hypothetical. I'm only asking about probabilities, after all. For instance, the probability of a princess showing up, unannounced, to a city known to be disliked by Celestia solely for the purpose of pleasure compared to the probability of an alicorn traveling incognito in order to gather up dark artifacts without raising a panic. I wonder what the odds of those might look like?"

He was sweating now. A greasy lock of mane melted free from it's wax-like encasement and hung limply across his brow.

What was this strange power that Cadance felt coursing through her veins? This empowering sense of... superiority as the proud stallion squirmed beneath her gaze? To have to have somepony trapped in the frog of her hoof... was this what her old rival had felt like all the time? No wonder she'd gone off the deep end and disappeared. Such power was... intoxicating.

But she had a mission to focus on. That, and the knowledge that she had two ponies listening in, helped her reel herself in. Now she just had to do the same to Gladmane.

"To find a family that had been harboring one of these artifacts for generations, well, you can imagine how poorly that might look for them." She smiled and shifted back to her usual tone. "But I think I've spent more than enough time talking about hypotheticals. What were we talking about before? Something about a donation to the Crown?"

Almost before she had finished speaking, Gladmane's mane lit up from within with a vivid yellow. A cracking noise caught her ear and she looked up to see the foreleg of the statue —and the staff it held— fracture off the rest and float down in a similarly canary aura.

"Take it!" he insisted, practically shoving the staff into her grip. "Great-grandpappy will understand. Good of Equestria and all that. I-If you'll excuse me, I think I just remembered some urgent business I need to attend to."

With a speed that belied his stoutness, he scampered away. Cadance regarded the Crystal Scepter. Much like the Diadem she could feel the spellwork within it, reacting slightly to her magic. It was the genuine article for sure.

"I thought he was going to take a bit more intimidation, but I guess this works too."

'Excellently done, Cadance.' Luna's praise carried through the air, 'I never would have thought you so skilled in using the weight of your station to your advantage. My sister is apparently quite the teacher.'

Cadance shook her head (not that Luna could see it), with a wan smile. "I didn't learn that from Princes Celestia. I was just... channeling somepony I knew. She wasn't the nicest pony, but she was amazing at getting her way and getting things done.'

'It is a tough lesson, knowing when to apply force and when to concede control. One you seem to be learning well.'

With that thought in mind, Cadance turned and headed back towards the train station, lost artifact in tow.

Three down, four to go.

Meanwhile, back in his office, Gladmane watched her leave through tinted windows. He slicked back his mane into his preferred style, making sure the horn beneath was perfectly concealed. Gone was his sweating nervousness from earlier, wiped away as easily as one of his performers' makeup. Once he was sure the princess had left, he tapped the office-to-office intercom on his desk.

“Miss Polk Salad? Set up a meeting with my lawyer. Tell him that that one troublesome clause in grandpappy's will is no longer in play. Mhm. Royal intervention. Dark magic, apparently. Also send a message to Beady Marble, tell him I want a new sculpture for the plaza. Gold-leafed this time, no, solid gold. I can do a posing Wednesday so I want it done by Sunday. No, make it Thursday; I wanna meet with my tailor first to get a new suit and cape for the occasion. Thank you, thank you very much.”

Releasing the button, Gladmane chuckled and leaned back in his chair. “Oh princess, you have no idea how much of a favor you’ve just done me. I’ll have to pay that back someday. Maybe I’ll lift the ban on her sister-in-law.” He paused and remembered the last (and only) time his establishment had been visited by the Princess of Math. He flinched at the memory. “No. No, I think that may be going a bit too far.”


Author's Note

This one really fought me. He kept evolving into a really complex and clever character. Had to struggle to not spiral into a whole extra tangent story-line.

Next Chapter: The Trial of the Flugelhorn Estimated time remaining: 16 Minutes
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