Fallout Equestria: Desperados
Chapter 21: FoE: Desperados, Ch19, No Going Home
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No Going Home, Part 1
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"Slowtrot would, every now and then, say that the war never changed, it only grew. When I asked him to explain, he struggled to articulate the meaning, but I managed to understand the basic part of it. Simply put, war is the inability to peacefully negotiate, either between groups, or the individual controlling those groups. It grows because longer peace is not established. It becomes easier to fight and harder for the two groups to see eye to eye."
"So what started as a trade dispute, then became a fight for honor, growing into a campaign of revenge, which turned into simply fighting to win against a hated enemy. It all ended when neither side had the will or ability to fight on." ~ Azure Dice
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Scribbling on her notepad, Jali finished recording the information I recited from my pipbuck.
“This will be of great help Mr, Slowtrot,”Jali said in a chipper yet gravelly voice. “I’ll still do my normal checkup of the patients, but this information will at least give me a starting point.”
Putting the notepad down next to a very thin-looking stallion, she then put her stethoscope onto her ears and waved me off. “You should go see how your friend is doing. She's been hugging that bucket a bit too tightly.” There was a playful grin on her face which was ruined by the exposed muscle on her cheek.
Trotting to the other side of the clinic, I found a less than well looking Harp Melody holding a bucket. Her mane was tied behind her head, all while being comforted by both Star Charter and Cloudy Sunrise.
“There-there. We’ve all been there,” Cloudy said while rubbing Harps back.
“Ya, though it’s been seven years for me. Good times.” Star chuckled.
Harp dry heaved into the bucket, making a less than flattering sound. “Why are there no painkillers out here?” she quietly wined.
She was far more lightly dressed than I normally saw the mare. Wearing just a short white dress that only made her seem even smaller than before. Not just smaller, but thinner as well, but not like the half-starved ponies that I had seen in town. She was just naturally a smaller pony, though still big enough to not be mistaken as a foal or young teenager.
All three of them were sporting the same gold earrings, causing me to ask, “Are those earrings trending in the wasteland right now?”
Harp grumbled while Cloudy continued to rub her back, but Star answered, “Harp needed some flair to her look and I just happened to have some spare rings to give out. You want one?” she offered.
I shook my head. “I’m not the earring type”
Star shrugged. “Fair enough.”
Star trotted over to me and wiggled her pipbuck. "So you're helping Jali out with that pipbuck spell? I thought you said you were unqualified to be using it."
"Well," I looked back at Jali for a moment before returning my attention to Star, "I asked Jali about it, and she said she'd give a few lessons in first aid in exchange for my assistance."
I pointed my pipbuck at Star. "Although Jali doesn't have many nice things to say about Doctor Quacksalver, she did agree that the medical scanning spell can be dangerous if no pony understands the information being presented to them."
Star rolled her eyes. "I doubt Quacksalver was thinking about the health and safety of his patients when he told you not to use it."
She raised an eyebrow at me. "So ... what does the pipbuck say? All healthy, I bet."
Looking at my pipbuck, it was indeed showing no infection within Star, though it did show that she had something listed as a mutation.
"All good, but what's an ‘Evil Eye’?" I asked curiously.
Star's eyes went wide for a quick moment before she scrunched up her mouth. "Oh nothing. Just something I picked up as a foal. That's all."
She lowered my pipbuck and gave me a stern look. "Now I know I asked, but maybe it's best to not say what's on there out loud. A mare has got to have her secrets, you know."
"Right. Sorry," I apologized.
Harp continued to purge her stomach. Its contents flowed into the bucket followed by a less than pleasant stench. There was a pause as we waited for the second wave. With another grunt from Harp, she once again purged, followed by her giving a paned sigh.
We all had been there before.
"There-there. Feeling better?" Cloudy asked as she continued to rub Harps back.
"Why is alcohol so popular?" Harp muttered before spitting the rest of the bile out of her mouth.
I shrugged. "From my experience, we just keep forgetting about the aftermath and bits we used. Booze is good at that, forgetting about bad things."
"And what bad things did you want to forget about mister from a better time, pony?" Star asked in a chipper tone.
"The war was a topic nopony could just get away from, so most ponies drank to forget about, if only for a few hours. I heard it was a huge problem among our troops," I explained.
Thinking about it reminded me of some of the ponies back home, making me feel homesick. "I had a short fling with this trooper mare, but I don't remember ever seeing her sober. She was just drunk or hungover. Had to break things off with her when she started to get abusive."
"As the old saying goes, nothing new under the sun," Cloudy said with a sigh. "My mom and dad would argue a lot. The Enclave was already having trouble before the clouds opened up. If they couldn't get drunk, they'd fight instead."
A groan came from Harp. "Everypony was too scared of my mom to even talk back to her. Never saw her get mad, but we all knew that it would be a very bad thing. Probably what my siblings and cousins always had empty bottles of wine in their rooms."
"Bridget's dad and I fought all the time, then made up later with whatever drinks we could find." Star chuckled. "A few months later I found out I was pregnant.”
There was a pause as we all looked at Star with some concern.
"Well, I'm going to check on Harp's health, for practice," I declared, changing the subject.
Pointing my pipbuck at Harp, it took a few seconds to bring up her status. It revealed no illnesses within her and a minor alcohol intoxication she was recovering from.
One odd thing did pop up. It was called miasma poisoning, and though it was minor to the pipbuck, its effects on her was listed as unknown.
"I'm going to share this with Jali, but it looks like you're in good health, hangover notwithstanding," I told her, deciding to not just blurt out what I had read in case it was likely something she didn't want other ponies to know.
"Just drink some water. You will start to feel better very soon," I advised her before trotting back to Jali.
The next few hours went on quite simply. I’d scan a pony, right down whatever was off with them, then hoof over the notes to Jali. It all made her job a lot easier. She performed her normal checks before checking my notes then confirmed their validity. For the most part, my pipbuck was accurate. Sick ponies were diagnosed far quicker than they normally would. Actually getting a cure or even proper treatment was a fifty/fifty chance. Some ponies left knowing that they were going to die slowly if they stuck around since we could not help them.
Jali had also found a few errors with my pipbuck spell, one being that it didn't know any of the new illnesses that have come to life in the last two hundred years. There were also the illnesses that had mutated. Treatments for them from two hundred years back were no longer effective. Another was a lot of the medication my pipbuck suggested no longer existed. Lastly, Jali explained to me that some of those medications that did still exist were either highly addictive or were deadly if mixed.
This all led to me being given a brief lesson on how medicine and poison are basically the same science, but with different philosophies. Most medications were in truth, poisonous. It was all about killing the illness before it kills the patient.
Other than the medication lessons, Jali also showed me how to bandage up an injury and other first aids. It was something I quickly realized I was not all good at when the test dummy I worked on kept falling off the table.
Between the lessons, I shared the recipe for the super healing potion I had on my pipbuck with Jali, who quickly recognized the brewing processes to be zebra in fashion and not pony. I told her about the Doctor Lifebeat and how the old Zebra helped me lust like Jali had.
There was a momentary pause, Jali recognizing the name Lifebeat as a Zebra her own father had worked under during the war. She was happy to inherit the finished research of one of her sensors and would gladly send the recipe back to the Follower’s main office.
It made me feel much happier that Doctor Lifebeats research would be put to good use.
As time went on, ponies kept coming in regularly. Many of them here only because they didn't have the caps to pay for Quacksalver's cures. Other than a few illnesses and non-life-threatening cancers, the most common affliction was withdrawal. The ponies in town seemed to be addicted to something or other, alcohol being predictably number one and Dash a close second, so nothing new.
Back in my time, alcoholism and Dash abuse was annoyingly common, along with every other chem under the sun, all despite the active anti-drug campaign the Ministry of Moral regularly pushed. Other than some drinking, I never touched chems unless given to me by a doctor.
Fortunately for them, Jali knew how to treat the withdrawal symptoms. If they managed to follow her advice, the effects of their addiction would lessen enough for them to easily resist the temptation. Though, if ponies now were anything like how they were in my time, most of them will be back on their favorite vice within a week.
Strange was the three unknown addictions that kept popping up. One being called Chill, the second being called Cruel Tea, and the last called Kiss Kiss. What made it worse was how none of the ponies tested could recall taking any chems by those odd names or even knowing what those chems even were. Some ponies were resistant to admitting their addiction, but most we saw couldn't give a damn. We're here to just get their head straight until they could afford their next fix.
"And you're sure you haven't been consuming any other chems?" Jali checked with a grizzled and thin stallion.
"Listen here, ya fucking striped zombie: I drink my booze and smoke my cigs to wine down. In the morning, I snort a bit of buck to wake up. That’s all." He spat back at her.
I cocked an eyebrow. "When did snorting buck become a thing?"
"You shut up!" The stallion barked at me.
"Well you're suffering from withdrawal from two other substances. Did you change your changed brands recently?" Jali asked
He then grunted "Fuck no! After having to use that cheap shit for over a week, I'm sticking with my standard, even if I don't get as munch caps anymore to afford it."
Jali nodded. "Well, I can treat you for the normal withdrawal symptoms. That's about it. If you do remember anything, let me know. I'll see what I can do for you."
The stallion got his treatment, insulted Jali again, then left like we did him a disservice.
"Asshole," I grumbled darkly. "But seriously, when did snorting buck become a thing? Isn't it normally in pill form?"
"Wartime buck is, but most ponies who make it today don't put in that much effort. They just sell it in its powdered form. If ponies don't snort it, they mix it into their drinks, often in their booze," Jali explained with a sigh.
She then pulled out a bottle that had a winged zebra printed on the side, with several pills inside. "At least the Angles put in the extra effort, so anything from them you know is clean."
"Angles? I think I heard that name before. Who are they?" I asked.
Jali put the pill bottle away. "They're a native zebra tribe here in Equestria. Their leader is the daughter of Xenith, one of the companions of the Lightbringer. The Lightbringer helped teach them chem making so that they could survive without turning raider, and now they're the main chem producer for the Followers."
"Not to be rude, but if they're a zebra tribe, then why are you with the Followers and not them?" I tried to ask as tactfully as possible.
She sighed. "The stripes on their coat are the only thing that makes them truly zebras. They have no heritage or stories of their own that is not steeped deep in Equestria itself. Being among them would be like being among ponies pretending to be zebras. It would drive my old bones mad. At least among the Followers, I know who I am; an outsider trying to fix a world we ruined."
I thought about it for a moment, and it did make some sense.
"It's like if I returned home and found ponies living like I did before the bombs,” I reasoned, “but yet it's all wrong. It would drive me mad trying to correct everything."
Jali nodded in agreement.
Something else clicked in my head. I said aloud, "Say, if the Angles are one of the only groups that practices production control, could whatever the ponies have been taking be mixed with other chems?"
"You are talking about cutting, and yes, I have suspected the same thing," Jali agreed shrewdly.
She then grimaced. "Unfortunately, even though we know what the new chems are called, we don't know how they’re made or how they're affecting the addicts. Unless I know what exactly is being cut in, there is no way for me to know how to treat the symptoms. As far as I know, the chem pushers could be adding abraxo cleaner or spark battery waste to their chems."
That put a bad taste in my mouth. "That's terrible!” I complained. “Why would a pony do that, and why would a pony take it?"
"It's the wasteland," Jali explained with a heavy sigh. "Any escape from this reality will be grasped at with ravenous hooves. There is even a chem out west that will ghoulify a pony in the worst way, yet ponies still take it.”
"But with chems like that, ponies know what is going to happen to them, and they use it anyways. What is going on here is different." She huffed in annoyance.
"They are unknowingly being given extra chems,” I realized with shock. “That's vile!"
Jali shrugged. "Unfortunately, there's nothing to be done. Even if we knew who was selling the cut chems, it's not like we can get them to stop or get any pony to care."
"What about the sheriff?" I asked
Jali raised her good eyebrow at me. "What makes you think she'd give a damn? "
"Alright, she is a bit crazy, but she does care about the town. If we can find out who is selling the cut chems, then she can do the rest. Maybe, if we help her make the town safer, then she will be less of a bitch towards you and the Followers," I reasoned.
She stared at me for a good minute, then sighed. "I'd advise you to just drop that line of thinking. With how Ashy has been, it's better to just take things slow. But, if you do want to find out what's being cut into the chems and who is making it, it would be a great help if you bring back some samples to me for study. With enough of it, I should be able to synthesize a treatment.”
"Or you can stay here and keep helping me," she counter offered.
I thought about it for a moment. I eventually came to the realization that if we just let things continue as they are, it was going to get worse. Just like with so many other things when allowed to continue, it always just got worse, never better. The war, the ministries, even the hate, we all just let it go on until it killed Equestria itself.
"I… I can at least find out what's being cut into the chems, then I don't know. Maybe we can eventually convince the sheriff to do something about it," I suggested with an innocent shrug.
Jali thought about it again, then eventually nodded. "That would be the best course of action. Even if the good sheriff does nothing, I can still share the information with the rest of the Followers. Maybe they can find a better solution."
She then gave me a serious glare. "But, if at any point you feel in danger, just drop it. This is not something to risk your life over. You understand?"
I nodded.
For the next hour, I continued to help Jali with patients. I recorded their information before hoofing it off to her. Between the patients we had before and the ones that just passed through, we were able to collect data that seemed to paint a picture. Among those with just one vice, Jali was able to connect a few dots.
Some of those who just drank booze had Cruel Tea in their system.
Chill was found in Dash users.
Then the Kiss Kiss seemed to be found in everypony but the ones who only drank, or only used Dash on the regular.
The main connection between all the ponies being that they've been buying cheap chems for the last few weeks, but no specific seller.
Also the symptoms of the withdrawal didn't seem all that bad, but Jali then told me that, though they might be minor right now, they’ll also get worse with time. I remember some of that from my time, but much of the anti chem abuse campaigns were so steeped in propaganda that most ponies thought that chem abuse was more likely to turn them into a Zebra sympathizer rather than an addict.
It was like with so many things. If the addiction was left alone, it was going to get worse.
After finishing with helping Jali, I trotted out into town with at least one direction in mind, the market on the other side of the tracks. I wanted to have Star help me out, but she had already left to help with the school. Harp still needed time to recover, so I didn't ask her. Besides them, I didn't really know anypony all that well, other than the Gunrunners, but they were very busy at the moment.
On the other side of the tracks, I still found it jarring how different it all was. In the main part of town it was reasonably well kept, but here everything was rotting with plenty of garbage left to drift about.
I made sure to keep my caps in my saddlebag and my saddlebag tightly fastened to my barrel.
Trotting to the local market on this side of town, the best I could describe it was being in organized chaos with much of the junk either kept in a tight pile in front of the pony, or locked in small rusty cages. The ponies themselves didn't fake happy smiles, but there were some ponies they were friendly too, and others they seemed ready to fight with.
Browsing much of what I saw was indeed junk. It was mainly rusty scrap metal, broken planks of wood, and lots of unwanted trash from my time. Every now and then I did see the odd jar of clear liquids, inhalers, needles, white powder in vials, and old newspaper wrapped cigarettes.
"Are those chems?" I asked one merchant that looked like they had rubbed off their fur in multiple spots.
"No, it's for washing your clothes," they replied.
"Oh, sorry then." Following that encounter, I turned to check the next merchant.
"Wait, ya dipshit! Yes, they're chems," the merchant called out to me. "Interested in buying?"
"Now that you asked, I might need a sample." I took a closer look at an inhaler, unsure what I was even looking for. "Do you know if this is cut with anything?"
"What are you fucking accusing me of!" The merchant growled.
"What? No! It's just that there seems to be an issue with the cheaper chems having other stuff cut into them," I explained.
The merchant pulled out a worn-out looking bat. It had several dents and spike poking out of it.
"You fuck off before I brake a leg!" they warned.
I backed off, not looking for a fight.
Going from stall to stall, I got the same response when I mentioned cut chems. Eventually they didn't even let me ask. They just picked up their weapon of choice.
I was getting nowhere fast and more glares by the minute.
"Hey handsome. I can help you out." A very thin mare called out to me.
Trotting to her, she looked like she really needed to see Jali with how yellow her eyes and teeth were.
"Thanks! I was getting a bit stressed there," I mentioned.
"Well that's perfect! I'm really good at helping ponies... distress," she said as she fluttered her eyes then stretched out a hoof. "It will be twenty caps."
Figuring that help was help, I opened up my saddlebag and hoofed over the caps.
"Follow me." She turned around and trotted to an alleyway.
The mare led me to a section of town that had several busses stacked on top of a few train carts with moldy sheets stretched overhead making it a shaded spot away from the crowd.
"Now don't make too much noise. Ma nabors have a temper, and are still sleeping.," she instructed me.
The mare trotted up a crude set of stairs and entered the back end of a rusty bus.
The inside was cramped with garbage all over. The front half was blocked off with scraps of wood. She sat on a dirty pillow and pointed as an old rotting stool. "Alright, I'll give you a good yank foe what you gave me, but if you want a suck, it will be an extra five caps, or another twenty if you want a ride."
Something did feel right.
"What?" I asked.
She blinked for a moment. "Alright, I'll give you a suck, and if you want a ride, it will be an extra ten caps."
Right, she was a prostitute…
"Sorry miss, but I think you're mistaken. I was looking for somepony who sells cut chems," I corrected the mare.
One of her eyes twitched as she began scratching a part of her foreleg that was missing its fur. "Here, an extra five caps to fuck me. I just need those caps!"
She trotted up to me, attempting to kiss me, but I easily held her back with one hoof.
"Miss, please calm down. You can keep the caps I gave you. Just stop," I pleaded.
She sat back down, returning to scratching her foreleg, but harder and faster than before.
Feeling a bit bad for the mare, I felt that I could at least help her out. "May I ask why you need those caps?"
Her eyes shifted before she then sighed, "I… I need my fix of Dash. I ran out a few days ago, and I.. I just need my fix!" she whined.
I thought for a quick moment, then got an idea.
"Miss, will it be alright if I scan your health?" I asked.
She cocked an eyebrow at me. "Ahh… five caps!"
Shrugging, I gave her the caps then performed a medical scan. This poor mare was in a real poor state with a severe addiction to dash, malnutrition, and an STD, but also what I was looking for, a minor Chill addiction.
I hoofed over another five caps, which she quickly snached. "Can you take me to whoever sells you your chems?"
She again shifted her eyes, then nodded. "Ya, we can get high together, but you're buying."
"...Alright. You lead the way." I backed out of her home to let her lead me to her supplier.
It wasn't a long trot. We just went deeper into the more run-down part of town. We stopped at a train cart surrounded by small huts that were made of sheet metal and other scraps.
The mare knocked on the door of the train cart. We waited for a moment as we listened to the sound of somepony knocking things around before trotting to the door. Opening the door, a grimy earthy smell assaulted my nose. Before me was a deer buck smoking a cigar. He had red and blue-tinted glasses on his face.
"Hay mare, it's … you. What can I get for you today?" the dear asked, turning to present a cabinet partially filled with chems.
His antlers sagged on a wind chime as he moved his head, forcing him to jerk his head back. The wind chimes became detached from the ceiling and tangled in his antlers. “Again,” he said with a sigh.
"You doing business now, Honey?" A tired dear doe trotted into view.
"Close the door! It's too bright!" A second doe called out.
"My sunshine, my moonlight, I got to sell the happiness to keep our groove going," the dear buck told the two does before looking back at the mare. "Now what bottle of happiness can I get you?"
"I… I want some Dash," she answered as she passed him the caps I gave her.
"And you?" The buck asked me.
Scratching my goatee, I then shrugged. "What do you have?"
"A bit of everything that makes us all happy," he answered.
"Then can I get one of everything?" I asked. As I did so, I pulled out my bag of caps.
The dear seemed confused at first, but then shrugged before passing several inhaler cartridges to the mare then pulled out eight different bottles and placed them in front of me.
He pointed at each one and explained, "You got some lunashine alcohol. It's strong, so best to add it to water or sparkle-cola. Then I got powdered buck and mentats. Just add it to ya food, drinks, or just snorting it will do the trick. Some dash if ya want to fly, med-x if you want to mellow out. Here we got some smokes. Not my style, but still groovy if ya want them. Then got my two own personal makes; day trotter, it will make you feel your best you. And smoke weed, when ya just want to feel happy and hungry."
"How much?" I then asked.
The deer pointed at the first six chems. "These are going cheep. Got a groovy supplier selling ‘em super cheap to help spread the happiness." He pointed at the other two. "These two, unfortunately, I ain't got ta grow ta weed myself, and the wait for ma herd to deliver the day trotter pills. Altogether, seventy caps."
I hoofed over the caps, but had to ask as I packed the chems away, "Don't you deer normally stay in your forests?"
He chuckled. "Ya pony, we ain't down with all that city liven. Got ta be were ta weeds grow."
"You're in the desert" I pointed out.
"The dessert of life, of dreams, but never in my heart," he said in a dreamlike way.
"Oy burnout!" a stallion called out. We turned to see a Desperado with a crate on his back. "Got your new shipment. You got the bosses payment?"
The stallion placed the crate just outside the train cart. The deer threw a bag of caps to him.
Turning over to me, the Desperado stallion cocked an eyebrow. "Yo Slowtrot, figured ya be the user type. Gotta love that deer weed he sells."
He put on a more serious face. "But probably best to stay away from that cheap shit. Tried the stuff. My employer makes it, and it was all wrong."
"Oh, ya no, I'm just collecting it for the Followers. It seems some other chems are getting cut in with the cheaper chems," I explain.
He groaned loudly. "Why am I not surprised?"
The thin mare shifted her eyes as she muttered. "So you're not getting high with me?"
I shook my head. "No, but if you're ever out of caps and dash, go see Jali at the free clinic. She can at least make you feel a little better."
She nodded before leaving, though I was unsure she would take my advice, the poor mare.
Turning my attention to the stallion, he was talking to the deer and buying a bunch of the smoke weed.
"Say, your employer is Blue Skies right. Can you take me to see them?" I asked the stallion.
He pocketed his weed before looking over to me. "If ya want, but be careful. Blue Skies are the most greedy and scheming ponies I have had the displeasure to not be allowed to shoot.
"But they do have a bitching game room," he added.
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-Reputation-
-Follower of the Apocalypse-
They are always happy to have a pony willing to help. Even if Slowtrot is not the most adept pony at first aid, at least he is willing to learn. Along with sharing a lost potion recipe, his efforts have earned their gratitude.
-New Appleloosa Downtowners-
Slowtrot asks too many questions, and now they see him as trouble, or stupid. Right now their siding on stupid.