Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sMeBtT0wt5tWRDhqiL9cSvy5EFvaFx1Bo9PGgUys4Y4/edit

I woke up cuddled next to the horrifying abomination commonly known as Chrysalis. I immediately suppressed my impulse to scream and instead snuggled closer, very used to dealing with hideous monstrosities by that point. Besides, Chrysalis is a real cutie once you get around all the evilness and the chitin and pretty much everything else about her. She also has good self-control; I was surprised she reverted back to her normal form during the night.

Since I really didn’t want to get out of bed just yet—and I had no real reason to—I decided to just lie there with her cold, hard body in my arms. I can’t imagine queens get many chances to sleep in and relax, so I knew she would be happy to be able to. And it was always nice to be held, so I wasn’t complaining.

I was still drifting in and out, my eyes closed, when she shifted and then pulled away from me. I heard her lightly hum as she pulled the covers away. “Morning wood?” she whispered. “Hm. More like breakfast.”

Welllll… If I’m ‘asleep,’ I can’t really stop her. I heard a wet smack in my head and assumed Flo facepalmed.

A few minutes and some much-needed relief later, Chrysalis gently brushed her hoof against my face. “Time to wake up, Nav,” she quietly said.

I blearily opened my eyes, grinning slightly when I saw her. “I was just dreaming about you,” I whispered before sitting up. “I feel pretty good, too.”

“That is good to hear. I don’t suppose I could trouble you for a snack before I depart? You always have a sweet taste.”

“I suppose I can give you a good breakfast, then.” She giggled and bent in, horn glowing…

Just in time for Princess Gilda to slam the door open. “I ha—WHAT THE BUCK?!”

We both looked at her like a teenage boy being told his girlfriend is pregnant. “So. Gilda, this is Queen Chrysalis. Chrysalis, this is Princess Gilda.”

“I know who she is!” Gilda shouted. “What is she doing here and why is she trying to eat you?”

“She was visiting someone nearby and needed a nice place to stay. I offered her my bed. And she’s trying to feed off me because she’s hungry. It affects me differently than it affects ponies, so she might as well feed off me instead of someone else. And besides, could you say no to that adorable face?”

Confusion reigned on Gilda’s face as I’m sure she was feeling rather conflicted. Eventually, disgust won out and she just walked out without a word.

Chrysalis sniffed. “Griffins.” Her horn lit up and the door closed. “Now, where were we?”

Taya and I walked in relative silence to the party that was taking place in the park. Everyone else but the naga was invited, though only Doppel decided to go. However, she was apparently too cool to be seen entering with us, and was planning on leaving to get to it later. Chrysalis left shortly after feeding on me, so she wasn’t going with us. Cadance was still worried about getting seen, even though just about everyone knew at that point that she was in my house. The naga wasn’t invited because I knew how he felt about gay relationships. Taya only went because I was going.

“So, what do we do if it gets violent?” Taya suddenly asked.

“You immediately leave. I’ll try to calm everyone down. If push comes to shove, I’ll extract her myself.”

“I’m not leaving you, daddy.”

“Then get ready to throw up a shield if I tell you to. We are not going to hurt anyone today. I’m pretty sure it won’t come to that. Ponies are pretty docile.”

“I’m not very docile.”

“Sure you are. You’re too cute and cuddly to ever hurt anyone.” Aside from Blueblood. “But that was, for the most part, a generality. I’ve met some pretty violent ponies in my time, after all.” Like Blueblood. “But again, we’ll probably be fine.”

“If you say so…”

On the road to the party, we bumped into Fluttershy and Applejack, presumably also heading to it. Fluttershy gave me a happy smile and Applejack gave me a shark’s grin. “It’s wonderful to see you out of bed, Nav!” Fluttershy said. “How do you feel?”

“Really good. You get used to feeling terrible and tired all the time and when you suddenly don’t anymore, it’s amazing. I trust you two are doing good?”

Applejack took that as her cue to jump in. “Doin’ mighty fine… Say Nav, you remember those seeds you gave me?”

“I do. Any luck with them?”

“More than you could ever believe, partner. I uh… I went a little overboard when it came to plantin’, not expecting anythin’ to grow from them. I’ll admit, I was wrong. I have as much of the Apple family as they can spare coming in from Appaloosa to help me with harvest in the next month. I was wondering if you could join us.”

“I don’t see why not. I can’t imagine I’ll be able to do much, but a set of hands is always useful.”

“We can think of some stuff for you to do, don’t you worry. Now, don’t reckon either of you know what this party’s about?”

I shrugged. “You know Pinkie. She doesn’t even need an excuse to throw a party. A wedding coming up is good enough for her. I wouldn’t be surprised if she threw in an element of me getting better or something.”

Fluttershy added, “I heard somepony was going to make a big announcement. I can’t imagine what it would be, though.”

“I can give you a hint,” I said. “It’ll be very surprising. Hopefully it won’t be an unpleasant surprise.”

“Now how do you know what it is?” Applejack asked.

“Because announcing it was my idea. Trust me when I say that it’s nothing bad.”

She snorted. “Comin’ outta your mouth? Well, I don’t get that slimy feeling in my gut that I usually get whenever you start flapping your lips, so I guess I’ll trust you this time. Nothing the town can’t handle, I reckon.”

“I certainly hope so,” I said. “So how have things been without me around for a month?”

Ugh, I hate recording small talk. Long story short, nothing important happened other than the Earth-that-was crops growing magnificently.

When we all got to the park, the party was already underway. From the looks of things, a very good chunk of Ponyville was there. After all, most ponies love Pinkie parties, and the invitations were rather freely given. A chance to skip work for a few hours and have fun draws quite a crowd.

Fluttershy and Applejack split off from our impromptu group and made their way to their main group of friends, though Fluttershy cast me a passing look as they left. I barely saw it, since I was already scanning the crowds for Bon-Bon or Lyra. When my questing eyes finally found the couple, I started walking that way, only to get immediately blocked by Pinkie.

“Heya Nav!” She had a party hat stuck on one of her front hooves, and I knew that she thought it was destined to be on my head.

“Hello, Pinkie. You are doing well, I trust?”

“Yeppity yep yep! And you’re doing much better! But not completely better, or you wouldn’t be here… But that’s okay, because you’re here!”

“I must’ve bumped my head on something while fighting that giant bird yesterday.” I saw Taya’s head jerk at me when I said that, but she didn’t comment. “For some reason, coming to a party for a couple that I’m performing a wedding ceremony for seemed like a good idea. Hm… You know what would be funny?”

“What’s that? I love funny things!”

I took the party hat on her hoof and put it on one of her ears. I put the other one on her head on her other ear. “There. Now you’re a pony elf.”

“What? I can’t hear you!”

I grinned. “Even better.” I reached out and poked her on the nose because it felt appropriate. “Now, I’m going to go talk to the guests of honor.”

“What?” I was already walking away, Taya jumping to follow me.

“So. A giant bird?” she hotly asked.

“Yep. Figured you woulda seen the feathers on the ground, though I did give the mess to the naga for cleaning. He didn’t do me any harm.”

“Uh huh.”

“Yep, no harm at all. Say, did you see where Lyra and Bon-Bon went?”

“I didn’t. I was too busy making sure Pinkie didn’t put anything on me.”

“She’s pretty easy to deal with. Misdirection is all it takes. She wanted to put that party hat on my head, but I guided her into thinking it would be better over her ears. Then when she was too busy wondering what happened, I wandered off. Easy enough. Ah, there they are.” I finally spotted Bonnie again, though she seemed to be lacking her fiancée.

I started heading that way when I was waylaid by yet another of my friends. “Been a while,” Twilight said, stepping in front of me.

“Well, I’ve been stuck in a bed for the past month. It’s hardly my fault you don’t consider me important enough to visit. And I thought we were friends.”

“What? No, I—Ooh, you always do this!”

“That’s because you’re just an easy target. What did you need, Twilight?”

“Did Applejack tell you about her crops?”

“Yeah. She asked for my help already. I didn’t figure she’d ask anyone from Ponyville, though.”

“We’re all her friends, Nav. We offered to help, since that’s what friends do. We knew harvest was coming up, though we didn’t know she had so many more plants than usual… She mentioned that you might have something to do with that.”

Dammit Applejack, you weren’t supposed to tell anyone! “She did? Interesting. Well, I’ll definitely be helping, so you needn’t worry about me not being there. Now if you’ll excuse me—”

“What I’m wondering is,” she interrupted, “where did you happen to get a large number of seeds? Sure, you mentioned that you used to do some farming back at your home, but it was always helping with animals. Where ever could you have gotten some large number of seeds?”

“I haven’t the slightest.” Her horn lit up. Fuck. “Now again, if you’ll just excuse me—”

“So where did you find them? Because you apparently know full well where you got them and that it was you who did.”

I narrowed my eyes slightly. “As a royal knight of Princess Luna, I demand you step aside. I will not answer your questions and you will stop asking them.”

She grit her teeth and glared at me. “This isn’t over, Nav. Not by a long shot.”

“We’ll see about that.” I walked right on past her, not gracing her with a parting glance. I had no way of really preventing her from going to Celestia, but I could knock the thought right out of her mind by getting Bonnie to make her announcement.

…Of course, that was only a temporary solution. She’d think about it again after the party. How oh how to go about this…

Flo whispered, “It was bound to happen eventually, Nav. You can only hide something like this for so long. Just let me go through the laptop and see if I can absorb the information. Then you can destroy it if Celestia comes by for a quick visit.”

I considered my options. Really, that was the best one. I couldn’t trust that thing with anyone in power, because I knew it would get fiddled with. I could perhaps leave it with someone like Dash or Fluttershy, getting a promise to tell no one about it and to never mess with it. Or maybe Bon-Bon and Lyra.

But those were concerns for another time. I tried to wipe the frown off my face as I renewed my search for Bonnie. Imagine my surprise when she popped up next to me instead.

“I was starting to think you’d never come and talk to me,” she said, sipping on some manner of punch. “So I decided to find you instead.”

“I have very needy friends,” I said by way of answer. “So have you two decided how you want to do it yet?”

She nodded. “Pinkie set up a small stage for when we’re ready. We decided to wait a little while for any stragglers and for everypony to feel at-ease.”

“Nervous?”

“A little… You and Lyra keep saying it’ll be okay, but I can’t help but think… Well, it’ll work out, won’t it? And you’ll be there in case anything happens?”

“I don’t plan on going anywhere, no. If you want me to be near the stage when it happens, just tell me when to be there.”

“Alright. And we’ve decided that if all goes well, we want to start doing wedding things in a week. So practice in a week, actual wedding a day after that, then ‘big’ wedding a day after that. If… If it gets big, of course.”

“Alright, that’ll be easy enough. I’m sure we each have our lines memorized by now, since we each only have a few short ones. You guys have a venue set up yet?”

“We were waiting to see how everything turned out. That’s not a problem, is it?”

“Nope. Just make sure you get a place set up before you send out wedding invitations. Sure would be a shame if the location is a bust and you have to send out more invites.”

“You won’t have to worry about that. We’ll be sure about any location we get. Thankfully, we won’t be bringing in anypony from too far out of town.”

“Your family won’t be coming by?”

“I… don’t think that would be a good idea. I haven’t seen them in ages… It would certainly be strange for them to see me now, all grown up and completely changed.”

“Meh. Up to you. It’ll look strange to have only half of the chapel full, but I’m sure that won’t matter too much.”

“Half the chapel? What do you mean?”

“Where I come from, the bride’s family sits on one side and the groom’s—or the other bride’s, I guess—sits on the other.”

She shook her head. “Here, everypony is intermixed, to show that two families become one. It doesn’t always work perfectly, but it’s a nice sentiment. But only Lyra’s family and a few of our closest friends will be at our marriage anyway. And the ‘chapel,’ or wherever we decide, probably won’t be that large.”

“Alright. Looks like I need to do some more research on your marriage customs, then. But since all I’m doing is following my lines, it shouldn’t be much of a problem.”

“For now. But when you get yourself a special somepony, it’ll be good to know. And a wedding is a pretty good place to find one, you know…” Oh boy, the look on her face…

“I’m not in the market right now.”

“Oh, are you sure? I know just the mare for you, too! And I’m sure I could find a stallion instead, if that’s the way you lean.”

“I am quite sure, thank you. And I prefer females, not that it really matters.”

She sighed. “Oh well. Maybe we can get you somepony on Hearts and Hooves Day. You have that nice, big house, now you just need a wife to share it with.”

“Speaking of that, I have a proposal for you and your wife-to-be. Can you—”

Before I could get anything else out, the noise of a dinner bell cut me off. We both looked where it was coming from and saw Pinkie banging away at it on a platform, Lyra standing next to her looking abashed. Bon-Bon sighed and whispered, “Come on,” when Pinkie stopped. She started trotting through the crowd that slowly gathered around the platform. I followed at a more sedate pace, since I had less distance to travel; I just needed to be near the platform, not on it.

Lyra was starting some manner of speech, thanking everyone for being there. I wasn’t really paying attention, too busy watching Bonnie pick through the crowd until she got to the stage as well. When she did, Lyra finished her speech with, “Now, for our big announcement! Bon-Bon, dear, would you like to tell everypony?”

“It is my announcement… Everypony, I’ve been… lying to you all.” There were a number of gasps and Pinkie jerked back.

“I knew it!” Pinkie shouted. “I knew you took the cookie from the cookie jar!”

Bon-Bon blinked. “Who, me?”

“Yes you!”

“Couldn’t be! I don’t—”

Pinkie gasped, cutting her off. “Then who?!”

The crowd started grumbling as all the ponies looked at each other with accusing glances, each wondering who had been the one to steal the cookie. Bon-Bon and I both face-whatevered.

After about fifteen seconds of letting the ponies talk, Bonnie shouted, “I’m a changeling!” and dropped her disguise. “There! It couldn’t have been me that took the cookie; I can’t even eat pony food!”

There were a few shrugs in the audience as they realized this absolved her of the guilt. That continued for a few seconds before the realization hit them and they all jerked their heads back to the stage, eyes filled with a mix of horror, confusion, and an inkling of anger.

Bon-Bon seemed to notice that and continued, “I… I’ve been like this the whole time. There never was a Bon-Bon, not a real one.” She was looking down at this point, unable to meet the eyes of the crowd. “It was all an elaborate ruse…” She finally looked up, a tinge of pride coming to her voice as she continued, “But I love Lyra. I love her and we will get married!”

Lyra stepped up next to her, throwing a front leg around Bonnie’s back. “Yep! I love her, no matter who—or what—she is.”

The silence seemed to stretch, with the audience seemingly getting more and more upset, before Twilight stepped forward, a concerned expression on her face. “Bon-Bon—if that is your name, now—I’ve known you since I got to Ponyville. And I’ve known Lyra for longer. For everypony’s peace of mind, would you and Lyra consent to having Lyra’s mind checked for charm magic? Everypony knows how Chrysalis ensnared the mind of my brother, Shining Armor.”

Lyra glared at Twilight and was probably about to yell at her when Bonnie put a gnarled hoof on her neck, shaking her head. “Of course, Twilight,” Bon-Bon said. “We have nothing to hide.”

I stepped forward at that point. “Wait a second,” I said. “Lyra had her mind torn into by Chrysalis before the royal wedding. Would that affect your spell?”

“It would,” Twilight answered. “But I can adjust its power and how long back it goes. A year should give us all the proof we need, either way.” She turned to Lyra. “This should be noninvasive and will only take a few seconds. Step away from Bon-Bon, please.” Lyra did so, with a long parting glance and a short nuzzling. Soon enough, she stood alone on the platform.

Twilight’s horn lit up and a dim purple beam of light hit Lyra on the forehead. The breath of everyone in the area caught and they all leaned forward, waiting to hear the results of Twilight’s search. Half a minute later, Twilight’s horn shut off and she nodded. “Nothing.”

Lyra’s face burst into a grin and she glomped her buggy lover. There was some clapping or clopping or whatever in the crowd, some indifference, and I saw a few ponies walking away in a huff. I knew Bon-Bon would have some work to do to get all the ponies back as her friend, but I was thankful that there didn’t seem to be any violence.

Just as I was stepping away from the couple to hit up the punch bowl, Twilight stepped near me. “You knew, didn’t you?” she accused.

“I did,” I answered with a nod.

“You should have told somepony, Nav!”

“Taya knew. I didn’t tell anyone else because it wasn’t anyone’s business. It was Bon-Bon’s secret and I knew telling someone would risk it. And I’ll have you know that it was on my advice that she told the town.”

“And I bet you had to convince her to tell Lyra, didn’t you? Should we really trust a changeling like this?”

“I tried to convince her not to tell Lyra. When I heard her reasoning, I eventually gave her my blessing. Those two are in love as much as your brother and Cadance are in love, and I won’t step in the way of that. I’ll trust Bonnie because Lyra trusts her. I suggest you do the same.”

She sighed, looking away. “It feels… wrong. But if they love each other, they love each other. I still need to let Princess Celestia know, though. She’ll be very interested, I believe.”

“I’ll be interested in what?” Celestia asked, stepping up next to us from God knows where. Queen Chrysalis stood next to her, an amusing contrast from Celestia’s stark-white coat.

“P-princess!” Twilight stuttered before hastily bowing. I noticed that a number of other ponies around us were prostrated as well.

“Rise, everypony. I heard there was some manner of announcement here that I might be interested in. Did I miss it?”

“I’m afraid so,” I answered with a shrug. “Long story short, Bon-Bon’s a changeling and she’s marrying Lyra, who isn’t a changeling. Pretty simple, really.”

Celestia smiled. “Well, that’s wonderful news. I’m always happy to hear that my subjects are happy and getting married. I take it this is the couple?” she asked, looking over to Lyra picking up a somewhat bedraggled changeling. They both gulped and nodded. “I don’t suppose you would mind talking to me in private, would you? I have some questions I would like to ask.”

Lyra answered, “Of course, Princess. Come on, honey.” She casually tossed her lover onto her back from her position on the ground and began following Celestia to Twilight’s library. Chrysalis and Twilight followed.

I wanted to follow, but instead I gave Bon-Bon a thumbs up and said, “Time to go,” to Taya. My plan was to get gone before Celestia realized I wasn’t following. Thank God, we did. That gave me time to let Flo attempt her voodoo on the laptop before Celestia came by. We got out of town at a fast walk, heading back to my pad.

“So why are we going back so soon?” Taya asked. “We just got there.”

“If you want to stay, by all means. My job is finished and I need to do something back home. I won’t stop you from staying, if you’re interested.”

“No! I… I’m not a fan of parties. I’m fine with going home.”

“Well alright then. When we get home, if you see Celestia coming up to the door or to my room, delay her as much as possible. I have a feeling I’ll be getting a visit from her or Twilight soon.”

“Why? What was Twilight talking about when she mentioned the seeds?”

“Another gift from home. I brought a few things back. One of those things was seeds. I gave those seeds to Applejack and she grew plants for me. She was also stupid enough to tell fucking Twilight that she got them from me. So now I’ll have to deal with Celestia and Twilight on my case, asking where I got them. This might lead to the laptop being destroyed.”

“Can’t you hide it?”

“I could try, but I’d rather destroy it than risk Celestia getting her hooves on it. I could put it in my gene box…” I think there was a setting on there to atomize everything if the box gets tampered with or forced open. I’d have to look over it again.

“Why not give it to Gilda?”

“Because she’d look up how to make weapons. I might have a way of backing up all the information. I very sorely hope I do, because I might not have this laptop after today.”

“Why can’t you just tell her to leave you alone?”

“I’m certainly going to try. No promises about how it’ll end.” If all else fails, I’ll try seducing her. Maybe that would distract her.

Flo just sighed at that.

“Seems to me that if she doesn’t listen to you saying no, she should be put down.”

“That is the kind of thing you need to keep to yourself. Killing Celestia would bring more problems than it’s worth and I don’t want to hear you bringing it up again.” She didn’t reply, but I knew what she was thinking.

We got back to my house in a silence that made me wonder why she was spending time with me. I mean, we’re both bad at small-talk, so there tended to be long pauses in conversation. We don’t really have many common interests. I don’t know, maybe it’s just a child thing.

Right about the time we were getting back, Doppel was stepping out the door, all dolled up in a cute dress and what looked like blush on her cheeks. She sighed when she saw us and her tail and ears drooped. “Is the party already over?”

“Nah, we just left early. The big announcement’s done and I figured I was no longer needed.”

“So I can still go?”

“Sure, knock yourself out. If you see Celestia heading this way, do your best to distract her. Other than that, stay away from married guys and you’re good.”

“Of course. I have two exuberant young guys to steal all the lust I need from. I just like looking good sometimes.”

I shrugged. “More power to you. Have fun.”

She grinned, showing off her fangs. “Oh, I will.” Her wings lifted from her dress and she jumped into the air, buzzing off toward Ponyville.

Taya and I stepped on inside. I immediately went upstairs to get to my laptop. Taya followed me, because that’s what she does. It would probably be best to remove her once I got Flo into the laptop, but she could hang around until then. Freki was also chilling out up there, since he knew how important I considered the shit in my office. He followed us in.

“So how are you going to back it up?” she asked as I pulled the laptop from the locked drawer.

I booted it up and answered, “A secret. One I’m not certain you should know just yet…”

“At least give her the hint,” Flo whispered.

“…But it might not hurt.” Are you ready?

By way of answer, I felt something gently trickling from my ears. Taya gasped in surprise as some of Flo dribbled down my arm, connected to the laptop.

“Taya, do you remember how I said that I have a voice in my head? And that I talk to her sometimes? Meet Flo.” Taya’s mouth just dropped. “Yeah, that was my reaction.” Flo’s tendril of watery machines tentatively poked one of the information ports of my laptop before actually connecting with it. The slightly pink-tinged tendril immediately turned black. “Flo?” Not once had I ever seen her as that color.

She didn’t or couldn’t answer. I resorted to gently stroking her watery form, trying to give her some manner of comfort. “What’s wrong?” Taya asked.

“I don’t know. Normally she’s a light pink or blue. Black has to be some kind of distress… Dammit, Flo.”

“So what is she?”

“A tight grouping of nanomachines that have attained sentience and call themselves a water elemental. Her name is Flo. I found her… Well, that doesn’t matter anymore. And as with many things, this is a secret. A huge secret. Never mention this again at all until I give you permission, not even to me.”

“What does she do, then?”

“She’s the reason I’m not crazy, basically. She protects my dreams from the horrors I would usually have. She also keeps me company in my mind, and is the reason I can remember all the books I write.”

“How long have you known her?”

“Since Appaloosa. It’s strange, having someone living in your head, but you get used to it.”

“…Can I meet her? Or at least, talk to her?”

“Maybe. I’ll have to ask her when she gets back in my head. And you don’t need to worry; she’s just as protective of me as you are.”

“I find that hard to believe,” she muttered, looking down at the black mass connected to the laptop. “So what is she doing?”

“Trying to back up all the information, copying it for herself. This way, if I do have to destroy the laptop, I’ll still have the information.”

“But then no one else can use it.”

“Not my problem. I’m doing the only thing I can. If you can find your own precious little brain leech, feel free to bring her here and I’ll let her take some information. But otherwise, this is the only way I have of backing it up.”

“How long do you think it’ll take?”

“I have no clue. She isn’t even certain she can do it, but I believe she can. She’ll have to get it done before Celestia gets here, or be ready to give up and get back into me.” It looked like she was slowly making progress; her color was slowly brightening from its dark black look.

“What’s she like?”

“…Nice. Comforting. Motherly, in a way. She got me through so much, so many times of horror. I don’t really know if I’d still be kicking without her. I’m certainly very thankful that I have her.” She was into grey now, out of her dark black look. “I know she’s better than this damn laptop, too. She’ll get through this.” She’d better. I’d be going on a long trip for nothing if she withered away.

“So all those times I found you talking to yourself…”

“I was actually talking to Flo, yes. The voice in my head. I may be crazy, but I’m not insane."

“I never said you were.”

“Didn’t stop you from thinking it.” She didn’t have an answer for that one. We lapsed into silence for a few moments, Flo still steadily turning colors. “I don’t know how much time we have. If Twilight told Celestia about the crops, she could be on her way here already.” I was wearing my ring, so she’d probably have to get here the old-fashioned way. “Can you wait downstairs, get Cadance and the naga, and distract her as long as possible if she does come in the front?”

“How?”

“I don’t care. Anything short of attacking her works for me. I’d rather give her the laptop than let her find out about Flo. If Cadance asks why, tell her I said it’s extremely important.”

“…Okay, daddy.” She walked over to the door and put a hoof on the handle before looking back and saying, “I love you.”

“I love you too, Taya. And don’t worry; we’ll be fine. It’s just another little bit of subterfuge.”

“Right.” She opened the door and left, letting it close behind her. It was just me, Freki, and Flo left. I wanted to get up and lock the door, but I really didn’t want to leave Flo sitting there alone. But I also needed to get to my safe, which meant I had to leave her anyway.

I sighed and rubbed her one last time before saying, “I’ll be right back, I promise.” There was no answer, of course. I hesitantly let her go before jumping up and running over to the door to lock it. Then I ran to the safe inlaid in the wall and opened it. I pulled the gene-locked box out and slammed the safe shut, not bothering to lock it again; there was nothing else in the damn thing anyway. Finally, I sprinted back to my chair and sat down, taking Flo back in my hand. I didn’t know if I was helping, but it felt right to be there for her.

While one hand was busy with her, the other opened the box. Inside were a few important documents, the gender stones, my magic key, a small stash of gold, and some other, less important things. What I was interested in was the little command console at the top that I never really looked at all that much.

I poked around the thing a little, looking for some settings. It didn’t take me long to find them; the console wasn’t that difficult and it was obviously made for someone that wasn’t all that great with computers. There was one thing that cleared all owner data, one that said the next user would be added to the database of owners, one thing that turned self-destruction status on or off, and a few other options. I reached inside the box and removed everything, shuddering slightly as my hand pulled out the gender stones.

When the box was emptied, I turned on the self-destruction option. I didn’t have an instruction manual, but I was hoping that option would destroy whatever was in the box if it was forcibly opened. I was planning on putting the laptop in the box when Flo was finished.

Which seemed like it would be soon, given that she was closer to white than black at that point. “Come on, Flo. Kick that thing’s ass. Or something like that.” I imagine if her tendril had eyes, they’d be rolling. Either way, she didn’t answer.

Unfortunately, I had a very bad feeling about the next few minutes. That bad feeling came from me remembering that I have a tinted window behind my desk that I could use to watch Ponyville. More specifically, it came from seeing Celestia, Twilight, and two guards walking through my gates. Freki whined when he sensed my reaction.

“Fuck. Flo, we have, like, five minutes. Get whatever you’re doing done and get it done quickly!” Once again, there was no response. But I did begin putting everything I pulled from the box into various places on my desk in preparation for Celestia’s entrance.

Flo was almost back to her original color, thankfully. I have no idea what that signified, but I was assuming it was a good thing. I didn’t even care if she couldn’t get all the information, at this point; I just wanted her to get back into my head where she was safe and I could hide the laptop.

A quick look out the window showed that Celestia and company were in the house. I closed my eyes and said a quick prayer that no one heard and picked up my stroking on Flo, nervous and worried for the first time in a long time.

Just when I was about to give up hope and just chuck her and the laptop under my desk, the sliver of water spasmed and disconnected from the computer. I hurriedly lifted Flo to my ear, letting her slither back inside. Closing the laptop and shuddering from the feeling of having something entering my ear, I slipped the machine into the box, closed it, and pushed it onto the floor next to my desk. As an afterthought, I kicked it under the desk, where no one else could see it.

I managed to lean back in my seat before the doorknob lit up and the door slid open, automatically unlocking. “Well that was fucking rude,” I commented, pulling a knife out of a hidden sheath and picking at my fingernails with it. Freki began quietly growling, standing in an aggressive stance.

“I didn’t want to make you get up,” Celestia answered, stepping inside. Twilight followed her, a smug smirk on her face. Celestia casually walked over to the front of my desk and eyed the chair I had set up before using magic to move it aside and summoning a couch from somewhere. She plopped down into it, still completely ignoring the angry wolf in the corner. “Now, I’ve heard you might be hiding something of interest from me.”

“You don’t say. Freki!” The dog snorted and stopped growling, but still glared at Celestia.

“Is there perhaps any truth to that?”

“Sure is.”

“I see. Is it something that I should know about?”

“That’s certainly debatable. Me, I’d say no.”

She lifted an eyebrow. “Is it something that I think I should know about?”

“Probably.” I set the knife on the desk and leaned back. Freki inched forward, ready to pounce.

“And are you going to tell me?”

“Not a snowball’s chance in hell.”

She shrugged. “Then I have no more business here.” She stood, lighting her horn up to dismiss the couch. “Come along, Twilight.”

Twilight’s smug expression turned to one of shock as Celestia turned to the door. “But Princess— He-he’s hiding something! Something important! I just know it!”

“And it isn’t our business. He would tell us if it was something dangerous.” She didn’t even stop for that reply. Celestia just let herself right back out. Freki sat back, tilting his head in confusion.

Twilight stood there staring at the door for a few seconds, dumbfounded. To be fair, I was just about as surprised; I was expecting a full fucking royal inquiry or something. She finally whispered, “I don’t understand…” After a few seconds to consider, she whirled on me. “This is all your fault!”

“…What’s my fault?”

“The princess ignoring me! What did you do to her?!”

“No clue. I was expecting her to rake me over the coals or something. Hell, never expected to get out of the country with this secret intact. Celestia’s more of a bro than I thought, I guess. Ah well, out you go.”

Her eyes narrowed. “The princess may say it’s alright, but this isn’t over.”

I sighed, rubbing at my temple with one hand. “Twilight, it’s nothing bad, I swear. It’s just a secret that I don’t think you should know. Not all knowledge is safe or good and some things sure aren’t worth learning. Please, for the sake of what little of our friendship might remain, just drop it.”

She looked away, sighing. “Nav, I… I can’t just not learn something. Especially something like this! I need to know!”

I heard a strangulated voice in my head say, “Tell her.”

This won’t end well. I nodded at the door. “Close the door and pull a chair up. What we’re about to discuss goes fucking nowhere.” Her face and horn lit up as she pulled the door shut with her magic and slid the chair over with her magic. She did her best to sit down, staring at me with a huge smile.

I twisted the ring around my finger, staring off into space as I considered how to go about telling her. Finally, I nodded to myself. “Once again, no one can know of this. It’s only a matter of time before Celestia learns anyway, but the longer I have, the better off I’ll be in the long run. I found a way back home, to Earth. The seeds I gave to Applejack came from there.”

“How’d you get back?” she interrupted.

I ignored her. “I got a few other things, too. Nothing you need worry about, of course. Just some clothing and some technology.”

“Nav, we can study anything you brought back! Maybe even reverse engineer it!”

“Funny thing about my home, too. You remember how you always thought I came from an alternate dimension?” She nodded. “I came from the past, Twilight. All the humans are dead now. And here’s the kicker: Damn near every one of the people I ran into back there refused to consider me a human. So my race is extinct now. I always did feel like I was the last man standing. Guess it’s true, now…” I sighed, closing my eyes and letting my legs just slip further under the desk. “There’s the secret, Twilight: I went home and brought back pain.” Leave it to me to find a way to make a good day bad.

After a few seconds of silence, I felt a gentle nuzzle on my arm before Twilight pulled me into a hug. “Nav, what happened to us?” she whispered. “We used to be such good friends… And now we’re treating each other like enemies.”

“Time changes everything,” I morosely answered. “Just… don’t tell Celestia about this, Twilight. She doesn’t need to know; I didn’t bring back anything that will hurt her ponies. I just want some comforts from home, some souvenirs from a life I can’t have anymore.”

“…Alright, Nav. I trust you, Celestia take me for a fool.”

“It means a lot, Twilight. It feels like I can trust so few people anymore. It’s nice to have someone I can rely on.”

“Nav, you know you can rely on all of—Well, you can rely on some of us. Cadance, me, Applejack, Rainbow Dash. When have any of us let you down?”

“AJ barely knows me and is rarely in a hurry to speak with me. I’ll give you Dash and Cadance.” I shrugged and added, “Not like it’ll matter for much longer.”

She looked away. “I… I need to go, Nav. Princess Celestia might need me for something else. I really want to talk about whatever you got back where you came from, though. Can we discuss it later, maybe after the wedding?”

“Maybe. I’ll have to decide what to tell you. As I said before, not all knowledge is good to have, and my people have seen what happens when you give too much knowledge to a culture that doesn’t have that much.”

She rolled her eyes. “Nav, we have just as much knowledge as humans. It’s just in different areas. After all, you don’t have any magic.”

“And I thank God for that. Magic holds this place back. But that’s a debate for another time. Go and pleasure your teacher, or whatever.”

“Ugh. You’re horrible.”

“Go for her ears. They’re really sensitive.”

She blushed, quickly shaking her head and walking to the door. “I’ll see you later, Nav. And I won’t say a word to anypony, I promise.”

“Thank you. And send Taya up when you get downstairs.”

She just flicked her tail as she walked on out. When the door closed behind her, I dropped the little smile I had on. “Flo? Are you okay?”

“It… it was too much, Nav.” She sounded tired and hurt. “I think I got most of it, but the flood of information… I don’t know. That was entirely unfamiliar to me and I didn’t know what I was doing.”

“How do you feel?”

“I feel… odd. There’s an unpleasant sensation I’ve never felt before ringing through my body, but I don’t know what it is.”

“…Pain?”

“I don’t know if I can feel pain. But if I can… Yes. It hurts.”

Shit… “Can you at least tell if you got anything out of that laptop?”

“I got some information, yes. History. Blueprints. Other things… It’s all just a flood, a mess of things floating around in my mind. I’ve never felt this… disorganized!”

“Alright. Take some time to sort through everything in your mind. We have time now; I probably won’t need you for the rest of the day. Just rest.”

“That is… a good idea. I will go silent and not bother you. Just try not to get into any trouble.”

I grinned despite myself. “When have I ever done that?”

“Done what?” Taya asked, stepping inside. I didn’t even notice her opening the door. The puppy wagged his wooden tail when he saw her, and I felt about the same way.

“Just talking to Flo. She’s… pretty beat up. But everything went better than expected: Celestia just said a few things before leaving. The secret is safe for another day.”

She breathed a sigh of relief, for whatever reason. “We didn’t do a very good job of distracting her… She kind of ignored us.”

“It happens. And it all worked out well in the end, so whatever. Now, I’m taking the rest of the damn day off. I need to deal with Gilda and Flo really needs to rest.”

She shrugged. “Alright. I always like lazy days.”

That night and the next night, I skipped my ‘lessons’ with Luna. Flo was still feeling pretty bad and I didn’t want to go into any dreams without her to back me up. It’s not that I figured I couldn’t handle it, it’s more that I didn’t want to risk Luna pulling anything on me without someone there to help me. Call me paranoid, but I’d rather not take chances.

At around the middle of that second day, Spike came by. I was currently in my room with Gilda, going over some annoyingly detailed engine. We had been trying to figure the damn thing out for over an hour already and I think both of us were about on the edge of getting extremely pissed.

So when the door pushed open, we both saw it as a sign that it was break time. She stood, stretching. “I’ll be back when I’m back. I gotta get out of this stuffy room for a while.” She pushed past Spike with barely a glance, not paying attention to the sword on his back or the shield in his hand.

“You ready?” he asked as I shut the laptop.

“…For what?”

“We’re going to go see that changeling today, remember?”

I sighed. “Oh yeah. Let me think for a moment.” Flo, are you able to do anything?

“I am… well enough. And I believe I know how to help Mirror, from sorting through the computer’s documents.”

“Alright,” I said, standing off the bed. “I’ll get ready to go. But I don’t want you going, Spike. It might not be safe.”

He snorted, breathing out a thin plume of steam. “I’m going if I have to walk there. And I think that might be a little more dangerous than dealing with her personally.”

“Oh, I see what it is. You want to be held in my big, manly arms. I bet you’re just waiting to steal a kiss.”

He was blushing a bright red by the end of that, but he haughtily answered, “And with your reputation, you’d probably accept it.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault I have a dragon fetish! I usually prefer them without a dick, though.”

“If that isn’t your fault, then it isn’t mine that I prefer soft and squishy to hard and buggy.”

I rolled my eyes before sarcastically saying, “Then we can fuck when we get back. For now, get out so I can change.” His eyes went really wide before he quickly made himself scarce. “…He does know what sarcasm is, right?” I asked no one.

Flo decided to answer, “I certainly hope so. You’ve been doing very well, and it would be a shame to ruin your streak on someone so innocent.”

“…Right. A shame.” I shook my head quickly and closed the door before changing into clothes that would work well under armor. When I had that on, I took a few minutes to put my armor on, because I wasn’t going to take any chances with Mirror. Before I left, a small thought occurred to me. “Flo, do you think it would be wise to ask Celestia to watch us deal with Mirror? If things go sour, she can step in.”

“It has positives and negatives. We don’t know if Mirror is able to use magic, so she could catch you by surprise if you aren’t wearing your ring. But if I am correct in diagnosing Mirror, then I will have to be very involved in her treatment, something that we don’t want Celestia to see. And if I happen to be successful, there is a good chance Celestia might be eager to obtain the services of this little changeling, should she find out about her. However, Mirror might be dangerous, which is the main worry we have. She might also be leading you into a trap, which seems unlikely.”

“So you’re saying that I shouldn’t contact Celestia.”

“I would not, no.”

I shrugged and grabbed my gun from its position next to my bed. “No reason not to bring this, then.” I grabbed two magazines and slid them into a leather carrying case I made and put onto my belt. The belt already had two knives on it, so I didn’t bother adding any other weapons; weight was still an issue, after all.

With my gear sorted, I started walking through the house to the front gate. We could fly out the back, but Taya was back there with her instructor and I didn’t want her seeing me flying out in a way that she could possibly stop me—or worse, demand to go with me.

I found Cadance downstairs and told her I was going into the forest. She grunted by way of reply, too busy doing something with her foal to do much else. Spike was standing under the gate outside. Thankfully, he apparently remembered that if we were flying, I couldn’t carry much weight, and thus only had his sword with him. I walked on over.

“Last chance to back out,” I said. “I wouldn’t blame you if you did. I really don’t want to risk this, personally.”

“I’m going,” he answered, nodding his head with a grim finality.

“A shame. Well, come on. She didn’t give us a time, so we might be waiting there for a while. And she might already be there. And hell, she might have even forgotten. Let’s go find out, shall we?”

He walked over to me and hopped up into my arms. “If this is too awkward for you, I really don’t mind the other way,” he said right before I took off.

“Doesn’t bother me. I’ve had worse things assumed of me than being gay. Hell, I wouldn’t even mind people assuming it that much; less people would flirt with me, at least.”

“I thought you enjoyed that.”

“I don’t mind it when it’s not little girls that are doing the flirting. I had Twist and a few other fillies doing things like that.”

“Oooh, I’m so sorry, dude. Twist scares me sometimes.”

“Yeah. As long as she doesn’t go Misery on me, I can deal with some minor flirting.”

“…Misery?”

“Something from my world, a book. A woman kidnaps her favorite author, breaks his legs so he can’t leave, and makes him write his book so that it has her preferred ending. I don’t want something like that happening to me.”

“Yeah, I can understand that. Nav, humans are pretty twisted.”

“Yep.” The conversation lapsed at that point, which was good because I needed to pay attention to flying.

Until… “So what if she does turn out to be dangerous?” he asked.

“Then I’ll take care of her. Don’t you worry about it.”

That shut him up until we landed next to the tree. I hadn’t seen Mirror from the air, so I was assuming she wasn’t there. When we landed, though, we heard someone muttering on the other side of the tree. I put my finger to my lips so Spike wouldn’t open his mouth and listened.

“Of course he’ll come… He said he would! Navarone wouldn’t lie. Would he…?” Her voice changed pitch and tone. “You saw how he looked at you. Disgust. Annoyance. Of course he won’t show up. Nothing would want anything to do with you.” And it changed again. “Don’t listen to that one. He’ll come. He’ll come and help us like he helped the others. He’ll be here.” Another one. “He’ll come and then he’ll cum. We’ll jump his bones and ride him forever. You know how he treated the queen!” Another. “No. He’ll come and kill you. He knows the queen. If he knows the queen, he probably told her about you. It’s better to leave now before it’s too late.” And it finally returned to the original voice and she said again, “He’ll be here…”

Spike and I slowly turned to look at each other. His eyes were wide as your mom’s ass. I probably looked similar.

“Well,” Flo whispered, “I was right. Now would be a good time to go talk to her, Nav.”

God help me. “Hello?” I called, walking around the tree. “You out here yet?”

I heard her jump when I said hello and when I continued she sprinted around the tree, beaming. “I knew you’d come!” And then she saw Spike and her smile dipped. “You brought a friend.”

“That’s not a problem, is it?”

“No! No, of course not…” She chuckled awkwardly. “A-are you ready to see my home?”

“Yep. We flying there or is it close enough to walk?”

“…We’ll fly. How is he going to get there?” she asked, looking at Spike.

“I’ll carry him. You just lead the way and we’ll follow.”

“Oh. Well, it’s not far.” I grabbed Spike and nodded at her. One of her eyes twitched and she took off without a word. I leapt to follow her. She led me right to the fenghuang’s hole in the tree and landed. I sighed and landed right next to her. “Well, here it is!”

I looked down at her, not even letting Spike go. She was looking at me, smiling. “Mirror, is this seriously your home?”

“Of course! I’ve been living here for ages. You want me to show you around?”

I set Spike down and shrugged. “Sure.”

She walked a few steps in and waved a hoof around her and said, “This is the living room. This is where I live. Tour’s over!” She sat right down on a pile of leaves or something before she jumped right back up, a shocked look on her face. “Oh, can I get you two anything? I have… leaves. And bugs…” I think Spike had a somewhat horrified look on his face, because when she looked at him she quickly looked away and sat back down. After a second of awkward silence, she said, “L-let me just show you two out.”

I walked over to stand in front of her before she could move. I knelt down and put a hand on one of her shoulders. “Mirror—or whatever your name is right now—can I talk to the one in charge?”

Her blue eyes went wide and she leaned back, trying to get away from me. “I… I don’t know what you’re talking about. It’s just me in here! Yep, no other voices at all!”

“Mirror, you don’t need to lie. I’m here to help you. But I can only help you if you tell me the truth.”

She faintly whispered, “I can’t control them at all…”

Flo?

“Get Spike to watch the entrance. Make sure nothing comes in at all. And try to get him to not look at you, because you’re about to do something really weird.”

I shrugged my gun off and turned to Spike. “This thing is basically the same as the crossbow, but easier to use.” I pumped it and handed it to him. “Watch the door. It’s imperative that nothing get through. And whatever you do, don’t look back at us. Alright?”

“…Okay. Just be careful.”

“Good.” I turned back to Mirror, to find that she had backed up to the far wall and was glaring at me with hate in her eyes. I loudly popped my knuckles through my gauntlets as I walked up to her. “I’m not above holding you down.” She bared her fangs and launched her tiny, malnourished form at me. I let her tackle me dead on, face-planting into my armor. She slowly slid to the floor. Now what?

Flo sighed as I picked up a dazed Mirror. “This is where things get weird. Normally, it takes months of therapy to do this. However, I have a shortcut of sorts, due to my nature. I won’t be able to do it entirely alone, though; you’ll be helping me.”

That doesn’t answer my question. What do you want me to do now?

“Put her head next to yours, so I can build a bridge between you two. Be ready for anything, because there will only be so much I can do.”

I sat down on the floor and pulled Mirror’s body into a hug so that her head was next to mine. From the side, Spike wouldn’t be able to see that we were doing anything other than hugging. I felt something seep out of my ear and shivered at the feeling. That was all I had time to do before my consciousness was hijacked and I found myself in a blue void, standing on nothing.

“I’m trying to isolate the host,” the void whispered, the voice gently caressing my armored form. “Dream rules apply here, Nav, so get whatever you need to defend yourself.”

I shrugged and summoned a set of power armor and another bolter. “Ready to crush some bugs,” I said with a vicious grin.

“There… there have to be at least twenty of them,” the voice said, sounding somewhat disturbed. “Get ready. I’m bringing one of the more docile ones to bear.”

A very small changeling slowly appeared in the void in front of me. Her head darted around in fear before settling on me. I instantly removed my armor, losing about two feet in height. I covered myself in clothes that didn’t look as horrifying and knelt down toward the scared changeling.

“Hello,” I gently said, slowly reaching a hand toward it. The changeling eyed my hand with wide eyes until I cupped its chin and lifted its face up to look me in the eyes. “What is your name?”

“A-akin,” it answered. The voice sounded boyish and since changeling males and females looked the same to me, I was assuming it was a guy. “Where are the others?”

“Quarantined, for the moment,” I answered. “Tell me, who is the original? What is she—or he—like?”

“I don’t know… The others never let me out.”

“What can you tell me about them, then?”

His ears jerked down and he pulled away from my hand to look away. “Some of them are mean, hateful. Some of them seem to barely be there, little more than images, split seconds of emotion and nothing more. Mirror, Poly, Evo, and Eva are the strongest, and they come out the most. Mirror is lustful, doing anything she can to get a cheap thrill. Eva is eager to please, kind. Poly is the outgoing one, that tends to get all the work done.” He trailed off at that point.

“And Evo?” He squeezed his eyes shut, lying down and covering his face with his hooves. I gently reached under him and picked him up, sitting down and cradling him like a baby. “Tell me about him,” I said, holding him tight. “He can’t hurt you in here.”

“He’s a monster,” the tiny changeling whispered, eyes locked onto mine in fear. “Cruel and mean. He does whatever he can to make others suffer.”

“We can’t have that, now can we?” I looked up to the void. “Flo, now what?”

“Now we find one that we can deal with that knows who the original is. I counted twenty-two different personas. Whatever she went through, it was horrible.”

Akin jumped in fear when he first heard the voice, but he calmed down when he realized how kind it was. “Who is that?” he whispered to me.

“You aren’t the only one who has company in his head,” I said. “This is Flo. She’s going to help you. Flo, can you get Eva in here? She might be our best bet.”

“I can try. However, she can’t see Akin. I’ll need to send him back.”

That made him cling to me painfully tightly. “Don’t make me go back! Please! I’ll do anything, just don’t put me back in the dark!”

“Shh. Flo, can we just hide him?”

“If he can stay quiet, yes. They don’t need to know that we’re in contact with any of the others yet.”

I reached out and pulled an invisibility cloak from Harry Potter into being. “Akin, I’m going to put you down and place this cloak over you. When I do, don’t move and don’t make any sounds, no matter what you hear or see. Can you do that for me?”

“W-will I be safe?”

“As long as no one else finds you here, you’ll be safe. Are you ready?” He slowly nodded and I set him on the ground, tossing the cloak over him. He disappeared from view instantly. “Just stay quiet and don’t move,” I said as I stood. He didn’t reply and I walked away from him so I didn’t accidentally step on him. When I was a few meters away, I said, “Bring her in.”

Another changeling slowly appeared in front of me. This one was larger, but still looked basically the same. Her eyes lit up with happiness when she saw me. “Navi!” Before I could stop her, she plowed into me with a hug. I managed to brace myself well enough to not fall on my ass, thankfully, and wrapped my arms around her. “I knew you could do something to help me!”

“You aren’t fully helped yet,” I said, trying to dislodge her from my chest. “I need some answers.”

“I can help with that!” she merrily said, letting me pull her away and hold her an arm’s length away. She smiled up at me with those cute little fangs poking out of her mouth. “What do you want to know?”

“Who was the original?”

And there went the smile. “My brother, Evo. You don’t want to meet him, though. He’s mean, even if he has a good reason.”

“Your brother? So you were the second?”

“Yep! The hive needed more females and since he fed off anger anyway, daddy made him turn into me! He… didn’t like that. Mommy and daddy were less than pleased with his reaction. I was second, Mirror was third—after a failed attempt by daddy to make Evo behave—Poly was fourth, and then a bunch of other things happened that I don’t remember much about and now there are tons of us! It’s never lonely, but some of them are real jerks! And when some of them take over… things get ugly.”

I set her down and took a few steps back. “Flo, what now?”

“I… I wasn’t expecting the violent one to be the original. Eva, I’m going to send you back. Nav and I need to talk.”

“Ooh, you sound nice. Who are you?”

“My name is Flo. I keep Navarone company. Now, you’re going back.” Before Eva could say anything more, she disappeared. “Nav, we have a small dilemma. By all rights, this is Evo’s body. However, he doesn’t seem like someone that we should release and give main control.”

“Yeah, he sounds like a fucking dick. And according to Chrysalis, all changelings that feed on anger eventually get fucked anyway. I say we deep six that asshole and let Eva take over.”

“Should that be our decision to make? It is not our body. Shouldn’t we let her personalities decide?”

“Hell no. Bitch is crazy. We can’t trust her to make rational decisions. And honestly, what do you expect they’ll say? No one wants to die.”

She was silent for a little while, considering. I don’t know what Akin was making of what we were saying, but he was still silent. Eventually, Flo said, “We’ll need to get the major personalities together. No more than four can coexist peacefully. I’m going to bring in Eva and Poly. They’ll have to decide who else gets to continue existing. All others will be integrated into them.”

“Well, bring ‘em on.” Flo went silent and a moment later, two changelings appeared.

They looked at each other in complete shock. “E-eva?” one said in confusion.

“Poly!” Eva sounded much happier, and hugged her counterpart. “I always wanted to meet you in person!”

“How is this possible?” Poly asked, not participating in the hug.

“Because of Navi!” Eva pulled away and pointed to me. “He’s helping us using the voice in his head.”

“Yep,” I answered. “And we’ve decided that you two are going to be in charge in your body. From here, there are a few options. You can share the body with up to two others or you can all combine into one.”

“How?” Poly asked. “We can’t share with them. Someone like Evo or Rage always takes over the moment we try to let someone weaker like Akin take over.”

Flo whispered, “If we start integrating the weaker personalities into some of the stronger ones, they’ll become even stronger until there are only a few left. Or, as Navarone mentioned, one of you could take full control over the body and integrate all of the others. You’d be well-balanced and more in control, but you would be alone in your mind. Either way, you need to choose.”

Eva opened her mouth to spout out some nonsense, but Poly spoke up instead. “Ganger and Mimeo. They don’t get out as much, but they’ll probably be the most useful.”

“But what about Evo?” Eva asked. “It’s his body. Why shouldn’t he get to keep it?”

“He’s a dick,” I answered with a shrug. “Do you really want him in control?”

“He’s only mean because of what was done to him!” Eva quickly shot back.

“You said he ate anger. I was told that those that eat anger don’t last long. How long do you think it would take for him to break down again? Why go through all this work if he’ll be back like this in another month?”

“I… It just doesn’t seem right!”

Poly put a hoof on Eva’s back. “Eva, this is for the best. Don’t try to pretend otherwise. You know he would never willingly help us here. He doesn’t want to change; he just wants to hurt others.”

“We can’t just kill him!”

“It’s not killing,” I said, walking over and putting a hand on her back, joining Poly’s hoof. “It’s integrating. His personality will mix with someone else’s, if I understand Flo correctly.”

“You do,” Flo whispered. “None of you will be killed. You’ll just combine with someone else. Nothing will be lost.”

Eva sighed, looking down. “Then we’ll share… Mimeo and Ganger it is, though I don’t recognize either offhand.”

Poly nodded, looking at me. “Mimeo is cold and relatively empty, used for point-blank analyzing. He’ll be good at getting anything done. Ganger is extremely charismatic and can talk us out of anything. Ganger will be easy to convince to help. Mimeo will see the advantage in it and he’ll be willing to help us.”

“Flo, bring them on in.”

“I can… try. Something in their mind is moving, aware that things are happening. Navarone, be ready to fight.”

I summoned my power armor again and slammed my fists together, grinning at the small shockwave that they sent out. “Let’s do this,” I said through my helmet speakers, summoning a hand bolter and a power sword.

“That’s really neat.” Poly said, flying up to and then around me, looking at my armor. “How’d you do that?”

“Magic.”

She landed on my pauldrons and draped across my shoulders. “Pretty comfy. Could use some more cushions, though. Eva, come on up!”

“I dunno… He doesn’t look very happy.”

I snorted. “This is a helmet. You can’t even see my face. And honestly, you changelings are so light that I don’t even feel her on my back. I could probably hold, like, fifty of you before I even felt it.”

“If you don’t mind…” Her wings twitched out and she flew up to the other one.

“This would be so much better without the armor. You know, a threesome might be in order before you guys get stuck in one body.”

Flo materialized a tendril of water long enough to smack me on the back of the head. “Quit it, Nav. Now, I found the other two, I think. Bringing them in now.”

“What’s a threesome?” Eva asked as the other two appeared.

“I’ll tell you later,” Poly answered. “Mimeo, Ganger, we have a proposition for you.”

One of the changelings before me had pupils. The other had the same ice-blue eyes that most changelings had. That was the one that answered, “Speak.”

The other said, “What’s going on? Is that you, Poly?”

“Yes, I’m Poly,” she said. “Nav here,” accompanied by the sound of a hard hoof hitting armor, “is helping us. He said four of us can survive, while all the others will be integrated in with us. I decided that you two should be two of those to stay. What do you think?”

“What do we get out of it?” the blue-eyed one asked.

Flo answered, “Equal ownership of the body. Cooperation will be required, meaning each of you will have to agree to work together. You can either share your time or share your tasks; it’s up to you.”

“Acceptable.”

The green-eyed one nodded. “I agree with Mimeo. I imagine that between the four of us, we can do pretty well. What about the others?”

“Total integration,” Flo answered. “Starting with Akin.” The invisibility cloak around the hiding one vanished, revealing a sleeping child changeling, curled in a ball.

Poly sighed when she saw him. “When dad did that last punishment, he created Akin and Mirror both. I feel so sorry for them, locked in that moment forever…”

“He’s been here that long?” Eva asked. “I never really noticed him!”

“That’s the point,” Poly answered. “Scared little colts don’t want to be seen. They want to be ignored, even if they don’t know it. So he hid from daddy and from all of us. Only Mirror ever tries to spend any time with him, but he’s terrified of her because of what she represents.”

…His dad raped him, didn’t he? I asked Flo.

“It would seem that way,” Flo whispered directly into my mind.

“Do what you have to do,” I said aloud. God fucking damn, I hate people.

“Poly, you’ll get Akin,” Flo said. “Navarone, I am going to need your help to do the next part. You need to go into their mind to drag personalities here. As long as you are in your armor, you should be safe. Just whatever you do, don’t hurt any of them. I have no idea what would happen if you did.”

“…I’m changing, then. I would probably crush them if I so much as touched them with this armor.” Ganger took a quick step backwards and Poly and Eva decided to fly off me. When they were clear, I changed back to my knight armor. “Well, send me on into the valley of the shadow of death. I don’t fear their brand of evil anymore. How do I get out?”

“I’ll be watching and listening. I just need to talk to them to walk them through the integration process. Hopefully this won’t take too long. Brace yourself.”

I reached up and popped my neck as I felt myself shifting from blue into black. I looked around and heard growling, but couldn’t see anything in the darkness. “And I said, let there be light!” I slammed my hands together and an orb of blindingly bright light shot out, illuminating the land around me. I saw that instead of a void, I was in a cave of some kind. As soon as the light appeared, several things hissed and I heard scratching and scraping and things skittered into the dark.

However, not all of them fled. Some changelings didn’t move at all, aside from flinching at the sudden brightness. And one immediately latched onto my leg. “Hi Navi!” she said.

“Mirror?” I asked.

“Yep! You here to have some fun?” One of her hooves went to my crotch. “Ooh, already hard for me!”

“Metal armor tends to be that way, yes.” I looked upward. “Flo, what am I looking for?”

“Find some of the weaker ones. Mirror can probably help.”

“Weaker, eh?” Mirror said with a grin. “If you have that kind of fetish, I can help you out.” She shrank in size and let go of me, sticking her backside up at me. “Please don’t hurt me, daddy! I’ll be good, I promise!”

That’s… disgusting. Holy shit. “…Maybe later.” I did still need her help, sadly. “I need to find some of the weaker personalities for reasons that aren’t sexual in nature. Can you help?”

She waved a hoof around her. “Everyone that didn’t move. They’re all minor personalities.” I saw that there were about twelve that didn’t go anywhere. They were all in varying poses.

I grabbed one that seemed to be begging. “Flo?” A hole appeared that led to some blue place and I tossed him in.

“I can hold two more. Get an angry one and a happy one.” I grabbed one that seemed to be snarling and one with a big grin and tossed them both through. “Now, try to get some of the stronger ones that fled. Tie them up or otherwise incapacitate them and leave them near here. I’ll let you know when I’m ready for more.” The hole slid shut.

“Mirror, cover your eyes. Things are about to get very bright in here.”

She grinned, using holey hooves to cover her eyes. “I hope you’ll surprise me!”

I grit my teeth and stretched my arms and wings out, summoning enough light to fill the entire cave. Now, the motions weren’t really necessary, but they helped me concentrate for some reason. Doing things with your body, I’ve found, is a good way to focus your mind. It worked, too; the entire cave was flooded with light, revealing several offshoots and tunnels that branched off in all directions.

“God fucking dammit,” I sighed, looking around. With a shrug, I pulled out a gun that shoots nets, because fuck logic. “Mirror, stay here. Do whatever you do when you aren’t having sex.”

“Masturbate. Got it. I’ll be warming myself up for you!”

I didn’t dignify that with a response. It’s changeling hunting time. I knew that I had four I needed to find. There were twelve weaker ones around the center. Mirror was also back there. Then there were the five we already had. I’m coming for you bastards, I thought as I picked a random tunnel and started walking.

Two hours later, I had three of them struggling in the center, trying to get out of their nets. I was starting to get really bored of wandering through tunnels looking for Evo. “Look, if you just show yourself, I’ll talk to the others and see if you can get partial control.” Hell no, I wouldn’t.

“You’re lying,” a voice hissed from all around me. “I can sense you, Navarone. Human. Slave. Slut. Liar. You don’t care about me. You don’t care about anything. You just want to feel good. A little addict looking for the next fix. You should take Mirror and get out.”

“You’re starting to get on my nerves.”

“No I’m not. You don’t care about a thing. You’d sell your own daughter out in an instant if you thought you could make it so that you never appeared in this world. And of course, you don’t even care that I’m saying this. You’re just here to feed another of your addictions.”

I dropped the net gun and started walking back to the center. “Hide all you want. Flo will find you when it’s your time.”

“Oh, she’ll find me… But it will be too late for you.”

I rolled my eyes and kicked the air behind me, catching the lunging changeling in the face. He shot backwards with the sound of a roach under a boot. I walked to where he was struggling to get up and grabbed him by the neck, lifting him up. “If you try to attack me again, I’ll give you a treatment that’ll make what your dad gave you feel like a tickle. So unless you want your colon ruptured seven ways to Sunday, I suggest you play nice.”

“Lia—” I slapped him across the face with my other hand, breaking one of his fangs. “Attacking someone weak and helpless? What a man you are.” I punched him in the gut, smiling as his eyes filled with tears.

“Yeah, I know I’m a bully. And I know that you’re a weak little coward, someone I feel no remorse hurting. And I also know you’re trying to get me to kill you. But don’t worry; that won’t happen. You’d be surprised what you can live through, after all.” I gripped his tail with my other hand and dropped his throat, letting him slam into the ground. I whistled a jaunty tune as I began dragging him to the center.

When I finally got there, I tossed him into the pile of the others that were still struggling. As an afterthought, I summoned some rope and tied him up using his leg holes and put a muzzle on him.

Mirror licked her lips, looking at how he was tied up. “I do like me some bondage,” she said, giggling. “Can I…?”

“Nah. No one deserves that.” I’m really glad that none of them are smart enough to change their shape to escape that shit.

The next hour was spent periodically throwing changelings into a portal. Finally, it was just me, Mirror, and Evo.

“So what’s all this for?” Mirror asked as I finally tossed an extremely unhappy Evo through.

“Integration and shit,” I answered. “We’re fixing this body so that only four entities remain, basically.”

“…Will I be one of the four?”

“Nope.”

Her eyes opened wide. “B-but… Why not?!”

“Hey, I didn’t decide this. That was Eva and Poly. I’m just acting as muscle here.”

“Can I dispute it?”

“Doubt it. Maybe a few hours ago, sure. But now, I don’t think so.”

She looked down for a second, confused and probably scared. Then she looked back up to me and I could tell that she was fighting back tears. “C-can you d-do a last request?”

Oh boy. “…Yeah. It’s only fair.”

“Will you… hold me? No one’s ever done that for me before…”

I stripped my armor as I knelt down, holding my arms out. She uncertainly wrapped her legs around me, and sighed as I enfolded her in my arms. I began gently rocking with her.

“Feels… warm,” she whispered. “I like it.”

It took another thirty minutes before Flo said, “It’s her turn now, Nav. Send her through, but you need to wait there.”

I gently pulled Mirror away. “It’s time.” She barely seemed to notice, and just had a sad little smile as I pushed her through the portal. When she was through, Poly and Mimeo walked through, joining me on this side.

They both looked around as I stood and clothed myself. “Looks much nicer with some light,” Poly commented. “Feels pretty empty, though.”

“You can decorate it however you want,” I said with a shrug, pulling a vase of black roses and a table into being. I set them both to the side. “All it takes is the will to do something. You could probably change the entire cave setting, too. Just remember that you’re all in it together, now. Make sure the others are okay with any changes you make.”

“I think some sun would be good,” Poly commented. “I never realized it was so big in this place. I explored as much as I could, but there were places that didn’t seem safe to go.”

“As far as I can tell, it’s all safe now. So have you guys decided what you’re going to do when you get yourselves together?”

“Survive,” Mimeo answered. “Thriving is not possible in the forest. Little food. Survival is all that can be done.”

Poly shrugged. “We might explore. There’s plenty of the world to see. Maybe we’ll find some place with no changelings that’ll recognize our hormones. And if not, at least we’ll have seen the world.”

I crossed my arms, leaning back a little and thinking. “I got a proposition for you. You know I live in Equestria’s borders, right on the edge of the forest. I have a changeling in my service already and I can convince her to keep quiet about you. I’ll be leaving soon and you can come with me. If you find a place in the world you’d rather be, you’re welcome to leave at any time. I’ll keep you safe from Chrysalis if I have to beat her myself.”

“Define leaving,” Mimeo said.

“As in, leaving Equestria and going around the world. It’ll probably be a lot safer than going yourself, what with having a large number of people going. Of course, you’ll be in my home first on a tentative basis. If you prove yourself capable and sane even with four people in your head, you’ll be free to stay. You fuck up too badly and you’re out. Talk to the others about it and get an answer back to me.”

“…You would do that? Even after all you’ve done for us?” Poly slowly asked.

I shrugged. “Don’t see why I wouldn’t. Changelings are awfully useful. And I’d say that you’re pretty down on your luck and wouldn’t mind a little bit of help. If you don’t want to work for me, you’re welcome to try your luck with Celestia or Luna—though I suggest against both of them. Maybe Cadance. Just talk it over with the others. Know that you have plenty of options. And God, this is taking fucking forever. Flo, if I eat in here, will I still be hungry?”

“Yes. I’m sending the others through and pulling you back, though. Just give me a moment.”

I nodded at the two entities before me. “Until we meet in person, then.”

Mimeo nodded and Poly waved as I faded out of their mind and into Flo’s void. I looked around to find that I was alone. Flo sighed deeply and whispered, “It’s hard, killing others… They weren’t technically people, but they still had feelings and were individuals. And we… destroyed them, in a way. Erased their ability to think. Shackled them as mindless slaves to others. And we call this the ‘best’ option…”

“It is, Flo. Never for a second should you think that killing isn’t sometimes the best or only option. It’s not always that way, though.”

“I know, Navarone. I just don’t like it at all. You are acclimated to it, sadly. But I am not. Water elementals have a reverence for life, after all.”

“I know. If you ever want to talk about it, you know I’ll listen. I’ve done my share of rationalizing in the past.”

“And all it did was make you cold, dead inside. Are you ready to return to the world of the living?”

“Yep. I imagine Spike is awfully bored out there.”

“Then be free.” I suddenly woke out of my Flo-induced coma and took a deep breath, getting a nose full of unbathed changeling. I immediately started coughing as I pushed her away from me. I heard clawed feet striking the ground and Spike put a hand on my shoulder.

“You alright, Nav?” he asked, concern in his voice. “She didn’t do anything, did she?”

“Other than smell like Satan’s gym clothes, no. Fuck, but she needs a bath! How long were we out?”

“It’s been hours. I got really bored, just sitting around. But how did you just now notice her smell? I could tell when I got in here and you were holding her for hours!”

“My mind was elsewhere. Did anything try to attack us?”

“…Yes. You didn’t hear me kill it?”

“Nope. What was it?”

“Cockatrice. This thing shoots real nice, too. Can you make me one?”

“Nope.” I pulled it out of his hands and popped the clip. Eight rounds left, with one in the chamber. “One shot, one kill. I like it. Those things aren’t worth eating and the round would go clear through it, so we won’t bother recovering it. How’s Eva?”

“…Who?”

I nodded at the changeling, who was now sitting up and rubbing at her head. “How you feeling?” I asked her.

She jerked her head to mine when she heard my voice. A massive smile grew on her face and before I knew what was happening I got pile-drived in a hug. “Thank you thank you thank you! I knew you could help, Navi!”

I patted her on the back before prying her off of me and setting her down, standing up, and walking away several steps. “It’s good that you’re better, but you smell like you were rolling around in no man’s land. If you decide to take my offer, before anything else, you are going to spend at least half an hour in a bath, scrubbing until I don’t gag as soon as you get near.”

“What offer?” Spike asked.

“I’m working for him now!” she shouted, still beaming. “We all agreed that it would be best to stay with you for at least the time being, until we can either learn some useful skills or find somewhere else to stay.”

Spike grabbed my arm and pulled me down to whisper, “I thought you said she was dangerous!”

“She’s better now,” I whispered back. I pulled away from him and nodded at Eva. “Then get whatever you want to save from this place and let’s go. I’m going to have a lot of explaining to do…”

“And Taya won’t be happy,” Flo whispered. “Remember what you told her.”

…Fuck. “Eva, make sure not to tell anyone about you-know-what,” I said, tapping my head. I wanted to make sure she wouldn’t tell fucking anyone about Flo.

“Don’t you worry, Navi! I won’t tell anyone your secret.”

“Awesome. Now can you stop calling me that?”

“Nope! Ready to go when you are!”

I sighed, shouldering my rifle and turning to Spike. “Come on up. Sooner we leave, the sooner I can get out of this armor and get yelled at by Taya.”

“Yelled at for what?” Spike asked as he jumped into my arms.

“I told her I wasn’t coming out here.” I carried him over to the edge of the hole and jumped out, soaring out and away. Eva easily followed, flying along next to me in her regular body. I lazily flew toward home, not really looking forward to the conversations that were about to happen.

I was tempted to land at Fluttershy’s pad and make Eva take a bath while I went and tried to explain things, but I quickly decided I didn’t want to risk leaving her alone with Fluttershy. So instead I flew directly to my house, looking around for a second before landing. I set Spike down and said, “Eva, Spike, wait here. I’ll be right back.”

Spike sighed and eyed Eva warily, backing away several steps when he thought she wasn’t looking. She was just looking around the yard in fascination, taking in the flowers and whatever else she could see. I started walking around the back. Taya was doing something weird with her instructor and the naga was watching them both warily. I walked over to him.

“I do not think I care for magic, Cain,” he said, still eyeing them both. “It has destructive potentials that are not at all fair in a fight.”

“I know. It’s great when it’s on your side. Why do you think I let Taya learn all this shit? Now, I have a task for you. In the front yard is a changeling. She might be dangerous. She will be staying with us for a little while. If we determine that she’s dangerous or unsound, she’ll get the boot. If she’s fine, she’ll be staying for longer. But until we decide, I want her watched. Can you keep an eye on her for me?”

“Very well. She is in the front, you said?”

“Yeah. Tell her that her first task is immediately taking a bath. Take her to one of the unused guest rooms and stand guard while she does her business. I don’t care if you have to physically drag her to a bath; she is going to wash before she talks to anyone else that lives here.”

“That sounds easy enough. I know from Doppel’s advances on me that they are light and easily carried. Why is it so important that she bathe?”

“You’ll see. I’ll go inside and explain the situation to Cadance and Doppel, if they’re here. Good luck with her.”

“She will behave.” On that ominous note, he began slithering away. I took a second to look at Taya and her instructor, who seemed to be holding a blindingly bright flash of light connecting their horns. Then I shrugged and walked to the back door, letting myself into the kitchen. Doppel was sitting at the table, reading some manner of mail or something. She didn’t even look up when I stepped inside.

“Doppel, I have news,” I commented, walking over to the table. She didn’t look up, just grunted. “News that needs to be listened to.” She sighed and put the note down. “I found a changeling in the woods that will be living here for some time. She ran away from one of the hives after going crazy from feeding on anger. I sorted her issues out and I don’t want Chrysalis showing up to kill her.”

“Navarone, that’s stupid and impossible for a few reasons. First, no one runs from the hives. Second, no changeling that feeds on anger lives long. Third, you can’t ‘sort out’ insanity. If anything, she’s a feral changeling sent here to spy on you by one of the hives that the queen doesn’t control. I suggest slitting her throat and dropping her in the woods, but I suppose we could turn her against her hive and use her as a double agent. I hope you didn’t tell her that I was here, though; I won’t be able to get her hormonal scent if she knows there’s a changeling here.”

“She knows. I’ll let you meet her before you decide anything. If it makes you feel any better, the naga is watching her and I can put my ring on so she can’t do anything. She should be coming in the front door by now.”

As if on cue, I heard the door open. Doppel sighed and hopped down from her seat, trotting over to the hall connecting the kitchen to the entrance. I pulled my ring out from around my neck as I walked that way. Soon enough, it was on my finger, the gauntlet going on the hook on my belt. I had seen no indication that Eva could use magic, but then, I didn’t have any proof that she couldn’t.

“Hi! My name’s Eva!” I got to within sight of them to see Eva holding up a hoof to shake with Doppel, who looked confused and somewhat afraid. As soon as Eva stopped, the naga grabbed her tail and began dragging her to the stairs. “It was nice meeting you! I’ll see you later.” That was all she had time for before they turned another corner and we couldn’t see them.

“Really nice girl. Still a little muddled. And fuck does she stink,” I commented idly as Spike entered and closed the door behind himself. “Well, what do you think?” I asked Doppel.

“She isn’t right in the head! Her hormones are overlapping, sending confused signals… She can’t be safe, Nav.”

“We’re going to give her the benefit of the doubt, for now. I’ll set Freki to watch her in the night and the naga can watch her during the day. Now, I don’t want Chrysalis to know about her. She’d have the same reaction you would, plus a lot more violence. As long as Eva proves to be safe, Chrysalis will hopefully never learn of her. If she ever proves otherwise… I don’t know. I’ll decide what to do then. Alright?”

Doppel muttered something that sounded like, “Too old for this shit,” before grabbing Spike and pulling him toward the stairs. She stopped when they were a few steps away and looked back at me. “Hey, you want to join, too?”

“…Nah. I need to talk to Cadance and then Taya. Have fun.”

She shrugged and continued dragging Spike away. Of course, he wasn’t resisting all that much. I wouldn’t either, if I was in his scales. Now, if I was a pretty pink princess, where would I be?

“You should be careful with who you call pretty, even in your mind,” Flo whispered.

You know what I meant. My first guess was with her brat. I waited a few seconds until I could hear Doppel’s door slam shut before following them up and poking my head in Cadance’s room. She sure wasn’t in there. Neither was her kid. “Huh.” I took the time to go on upstairs to my room and change out of my armor, making me feel much cooler and lighter.

That done, I went downstairs and called, “Cadance? You in here?” No answer. Maybe she finally went home. Could have at least told me.

I had one last place to check before I’d give up and talk to Taya first. I went into the cellar, to the naga’s room. Sure enough, I heard something splashing around down there. When I turned the corner, I saw Cadance lying on her back in the water, wings outstretched to either side. Her spawn was on her chest, peeking over and splashing at the water, giggling. Skyla’s smile immediately dropped when she saw me.

“We got a new tenant,” I said, stopping at the entrance to the little cave.

Cadance rolled her eyes. “Another girl you’re sleeping with, I assume?”

“Only half of those are true.”

“Oh, so you finally decided to try a stallion?”

“First, that wouldn’t be my first stallion. Second, fuck you. Anyway, this girl’s a little addled in the head. In the potentially dangerous way. Freki will be watching her at night and the naga will be watching her during the day to determine if she’s dangerous. I want you to help keep an eye on her.”

“Well, what’s her name?”

“Alright, this is where things get weird. For one, it’s another changeling. The weird part is that she has multiple personality disorder. I sorted it out for her and now there are four entities coexisting in her body. The host’s name is Eva. Poly, Mimeo, and Ganger share her body.”

“Navarone, that doesn’t make any sense. First, what is multiple personality disorder?”

“The name says it all. It’s a mental problem where there are several other people living in your head. Some of them are more ‘complete’ than others.”

“And you just… sorted it out?”

“Humans are considerably more advanced in mental health techniques than ponies are. This ‘disorder’ is just a blessing in disguise, if you choose to look at it that way. I could have completely put her back together, but if you can have four specialized personalities in your head, wouldn’t you want them around?”

“…No? I think I’m just fine having my head to myself.”

“Well, that’s your prerogative.”

“You don’t have anything like that, do you?”

“No.” Not of my own making, at least. “Anyway, I offered Eva a place to stay for a little while. I’m pretty sure she’ll be fine, but I’m just warning you in case anything does happen.”

“Well, thank you for the warning, even if inviting her here was stupid without knowing if she’s safe yet. Does everyone else know?”

“Everyone but Gilda, Freki, and Taya.” As I said that, Freki rubbed against my leg, making me jump. “Where did you come from?”

“He was in here, Nav.”

God, that’s creepy. “Then everyone but Gilda and Taya knows. Taya was busy with her lessons when I got back and I didn’t see Gilda.”

“Well, you should tell Taya as soon as possible. If this Eva character is dangerous, I don’t want Taya possibly getting her confused with Doppel.” She snorted. “Especially if one of them is named Ganger. That will be an interesting pair.”

“Huh. I didn’t even think about that. Anyway, I should probably go wait for Taya to take a break so I can tell her. Freki, you coming with me?” He happily wagged his tail. I took that as a yes and said, “See you later, Cadance. Try not to drown.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” she sighed as the puppy and I left.

Up the stairs we went. I pulled the door shut behind the puppy and then we went on outside. Taya and her instructor had moved on to something else, so I sat down to wait. The puppy ran off to the back wall, where a few trees were hanging over the edge. Need to chop those down. Or burn them back. Might as well test the napalm mix I made.

I was zoned out when I felt a stick poking me. When I looked up, I saw Freki holding a long stick in his mouth, tail wagging. He dropped it when he noticed me looking. “Really?” He just kept staring. I shrugged, grabbed the stick, and threw it. He sprinted after it as I stood. “Never thought I’d play fetch with a dog made of wood. Equestria’s a strange place.”

“While we are doing nothing anyway, I’ve been thinking,” Flo said. Oh boy. “It is possible for me take over your body in some ways. Doing so without your willing permission is difficult and I couldn’t do it for long, and honestly I rarely have any desire to. But… can I ever take over sometimes? Not to do much, nothing important. I just want to be free. I want to feel things again, things I can’t feel in my body.”

“You know I hate the idea of being helpless in my own body.”

“You wouldn’t be helpless. The instant you demanded control back, I would give it. If you don’t want to do it, I understand.”

“…Alright. Go for it. Take control now, if you want. I’m not doing anything important.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, go for it. Just be ready to give control back when Taya has a break.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to talk to her? She might be very upset when you tell her what you did.”

“I won’t use a scapegoat. It was my action and they were my words. I will take the fall and the hate for that. So by all means, take over now. But I’ll take back over when it’s time to talk to Taya.”

“Very well. Close your eyes and relax.” I did so, taking a nice deep breath. “Now open them.” When I did, I found that I was in the glade, looking into a screen that showed what she was seeing through my eyes. She lifted her hands up to look at them, turning them over and flexing her fingers. “It’s been so long… I can only stay in charge for so long at a time. I will try to make it worth it.”

“By all means.” I sat down in a nice armchair and leaned back. Flo played fetch with the dog with every sign of enjoyment. Hell, if she wants to enjoy all the boring things like walking and playing fetch and being normal, I won’t stop her.

I saw my eyes roll. “Don’t expect to pawn everything off on me, Navarone. Or at least, not everything that’s boring. And I would like to try sex eventually…”

“Well, we can use the stones and get Doppel to eat you out. Trust me, you’ll enjoy it.”

“I imagine. I’ll think about it later. You know, I can’t understand why you don’t enjoy things like this. Look how happy he is!”

He certainly did look rather pleased with the world. “It’s just not very fun to stand there and toss a stick around. I’d rather find something we can both enjoy, like killing.”

“I’m not going to bore you with the whole spiel about how sacrifice is a part of every relationship.” She knelt down and grabbed the dog on the sides of his head, rubbing back and forth. “Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?” He happily barked before pulling off and flopping on the ground and then onto his back. Flo chuckled and patted his belly.

“Daddy?” Taya asked.

Flo flinched, looking up. She said, “Hello, dear.”

“Whoa now, this is my time!” I said. Flo blinked and I was thrust back into my body.

“I was just saying hello,” Flo muttered.

“Why’d you go into the forest?” Taya asked.

“Remember the crazy person I mentioned finding?”

Her curious look immediately disappeared into a cold fury. “Why yes. I do remember that. And I also remember you saying you weren’t considering going to see her.”

“Yeah… About that… I did.” Her expression said more than enough. I held my arms out for a hug, smiling. She turned away without a word. “Oh come on, I didn’t even tell you the best part!”

“She’s staying here, isn’t she?”

“Wow, you’re good.” She whirled back around, eyes narrowing and horn lighting up. I snatched her into a hug before she could do or say anything. “Taya, trust me. I wouldn’t have brought her here if I thought she was dangerous.” I brushed at her hair, thankful that I took the time to remove my armor. “It’ll be okay. Just avoid her if you don’t trust her.”

“It’s not her I don’t trust! You told me you weren’t going in there for her.”

“I said that I wasn’t thinking about it. However, between Spike and Flo, I was convinced that Eva could be helped. I’m sorry, Taya. But to be fair, they were right: We were able to help her.”

She lifted her hooves up and pushed me off with way too much force. I fell back and saw that her hooves were lit up orange. She shook her head and said, “You said you would get better. You said you were going to try to be a better father. And yet the first thing you did was lie to me. Lie to me and then do something dangerous! How can you say you’re getting better if you’re just returning to your old habits?!”

“…You’re right.” My wings sagged when I realized what I had done. “I… It was instinctual, that lie. When you asked me, I was already thinking about going to help her. I just… I thought you would be mad if I told you I was going.”

“I would have been. But I’m even angrier now. This is why lying isn’t worth it, daddy!”

If you never learned about it, you wouldn’t be angry. “I know.”

“Then don’t do it anymore!”

“I can’t. I can’t make that promise or take that risk. All I can say is that I’ll try to get better. And now that you know about Flo, know that she’ll be keeping tabs on me to make sure I try.”

“You said that last time,” Taya coldly answered.

“If you don’t believe me now, there’s nothing I can do to convince you. Just… I’ll try.”

“We’ll see.” She turned around and stalked back to her instructor.

I sighed and whispered, “That could have gone better.” Freki whined and I patted him on the head. “She’ll be alright. No promises about me, though.”

“It certainly could have gone better, yes,” Flo commented as I stood off the ground. “Eva should be out of the bath by now. You can introduce her to Cadance.”

“Yeah… Come on, Freki. Let’s introduce you to your new friend.” He hurried to follow me as I walked to the house. When I opened the back door, I found Eva and Cadance sitting at the table, while the naga was next to the table, his arms crossed over his massive chest. Eva looked somewhat wet. “I see you met Cadance.”

“Yep! She’s really pretty, too.”

“That’s a word you could use. You two getting along?”

Cadance nodded. “She seems—”

Eva suddenly screeched and changed into a hummingbird, flying straight at me. She somehow got into my shirt and cuddled against me. In the time she took to do that, Cadance jumped up, kicking her chair back, the naga drew his massive sword, I had two knives in each hand, and the wolf was in some manner of fighting position.

And realizing that last one made me realize what the problem was. I dropped my two knives and brought a hand to my chest, cupping Eva’s shaking form. “That’s not a normal timberwolf, Eva,” I whispered. “He won’t attack you without a good reason.” She made some chirping noises that I couldn’t interpret. “I don’t speak bird, so I’m going to assume you just called me a sexy beast. While I appreciate the compliment, I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to not call me that.”

She morphed back into her normal body, but still very small. “H-he’s not dangerous?”

“He’s a fucking wolf made of wood. Of course he’s dangerous. But he won’t attack you unless he has a reason to. Don’t give him a reason to, and he’s the sweetest little puppy you’ve ever seen.”

“…I’ve never seen a puppy.”

I held my other hand out. “Freki, come here.” Since he was right next to me, he didn’t have far to go. He put his head under my hand. “See there? Cute little puppy. Now please get out of my shirt; you didn’t towel off enough and I can feel the water seeping down my chest.”

“…You’re warm.”

I reached in there and plucked her out of my shirt, setting her on Freki’s head. “There. Now please don’t make that god awful screeching sound again. Especially not in a room full of veterans.”

“Okay, Navi. Sorry for scaring you all…”

“It’s okay. I suppose, given your history, that I should have warned you. Thankfully you didn’t channel your inner Mirror.”

Eva shivered at that. “No thank you.” She flew off Freki and expanded in size again, back to normal. I grabbed my knives and stood back up to see that the naga had sheathed his sword and Cadance was back in her seat.

“Well, I need to go into town,” I said. “Can I trust you two to help her get acclimated?”

“Poly wants to know if we can go,” Eva said.

“Well, the changeling spy in Ponyville is on my side… You could, though you’d probably be bored. And of course, you’d have to promise to behave.”

“I can do that! I won’t let you down, Navi.”

“…Navi?” Cadance asked with a sly grin at me.

I shook my finger at her once. “No. Bad Cadance. Now let’s go, Eva. You too, Freki. Sooner we get this wedding shit over with, the better.”

“Ooh, are you getting married?” Eva asked as we started to the front door.

“Nope.”

“Who is?”

“Two friends of mine.”

“What are their names?”

I sighed to myself. This is going to be a long walk.

One long walk to town, a long day of wedding bullshit, and a long walk back later, I was rather tired. Not of Eva, no; she behaved surprisingly well. I was just tired. It had been a long day, after all.

When we were almost back, I said, “Alright, Eva, here’s how it’s gonna work. No offense, but Freki is going to watch over you during the night. Stay in your room until I come to let you out. Freki will ensure you do this. Understand?”

“Yep! Can I have a teddy bear?”

“I don’t think we have any.”

“Then can I sleep with you until I can get one?”

“No. We can get you one tomorrow. Tonight, you’ll just have to make do. Your dreams will probably be very different now that your mind is unified, if that makes you feel better.”

“…It doesn’t. Also, I’m kinda… hungry. Mirror used to be our main source of food, but now…”

How did we forget about that? “My mind is different from that of ponies and most other races here. You can feed off my memories rather than having the actual emotion present. What’s your emotion of choice?”

“Love. That’s what all four of us like.”

I knelt down next to her and thought of something. “Go ahead. Take your fill.”

“Are… are you sure? It won’t drain you or anything?”

“It will, but not noticeably. Love isn’t an emotion that I let influence my mind often, so removing some of it doesn’t do much to me.”

“Cool.” Her horn lit up with its common sickly green color and she began to feed. A few seconds later, she sighed in satisfaction. “It’s been soooo long…”

“I can imagine. Now let’s go.” I stood back up and kept walking. “I don’t really know what you’ll be doing around the house, come tomorrow. What are you good at?”

“Uh… I’m not really good at much of anything. Poly says Ganger can talk real good and Mimeo can do whatever you need done. But Mimeo’s in charge tomorrow, apparently…”

“Eh. I can probably write out a list of things no one else does or likes doing and give that to you eventually.”

“I can’t read.”

“…What?”

She shrugged. “Most changelings can’t. Light is a luxury that no one can afford.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard this before. Alright, first order of business is teaching you to read and write. I can probably get Cadance to do that, since all she does is sit around the house anyway.”

“I… I get to learn how to read?”

“Yeah. You’ll probably also get to learn basic math, if you want. Is that a problem?”

She tackled me in a hug that thankfully didn’t really stop me from moving; changelings are very light, after all. “I always wanted an education! So did Ganger and Poly!”

“That’s nice. Please let me go now.” She was too busy talking about something stupid to hear me, so she just hitched a ride on the way home.

Eventually, though, she said, “So why can’t you teach me?”

“If I have learned anything from Gilda’s time here, it’s that I am not a teacher. And speaking of Gilda, watch out for her. She’s a griffin that’s living in my house as well. I don’t want you two to have a misunderstanding.”

“Don’t you worry, Navi. We’ll be good if she’s good. But why do you have so many people living here?”

“Doppel is the maid, Cadance is staying here because assassins are after her and she thought my house would be safe, the naga is here to teach me some things and to act as a guard, Gilda is here to learn some things, and Taya is my daughter.”

“Taya? And what about Spike?”

“Spike doesn’t live here. He’s just a friend that comes by occasionally. And Taya is a filly that you haven’t met yet.”

“When can I meet her?”

“Whenever you make time to. You’ll probably see her at dinner, unless you want to go to bed early. Or if you’re like Doppel and don’t want to watch us eat.”

“Why doesn’t she watch you?”

“She finds it awkward because she just sits there while we eat. Doesn’t feel included, I guess. You’re welcome at the table, or you can try to befriend Doppel while she does her thing.”

“Ganger quite likes her pheromone scent, but Poly just thinks that’s because she feeds off lust. But I always do like making new friends!”

“Have fun with that. Now can you get off me?”

“But you’re so comfortable…”

“That’s nice. Your body is hard and ungiving, not very comfortable at all. So off you get.” She sighed and fluttered off me. That was good, because I really didn’t want anyone in the house to see us like that and get the wrong idea. Since we were just going through the gate at the time, it was possible.

A few seconds after her little disappointment scene, she was back up and bouncing a little as she walked, humming a light tune. I knew I was in for a long… however long it took to acclimate her.