Author's Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FVGY7RKaH5IGksapVkTEhl_cClqHSF31yrErbTQJFSE/edit

When I got out of the shower, Taya was waiting in my room. Her eyes were fixed on the bloody armor on the floor until I walked in. “What happened?” she immediately asked.

“Shit hit the fan,” I said with a shrug. “Same as usual. We had to fight some duels, I had to beat the shit out of Pertz, then we had to kill half the village to get back to the ship. It was fun.” But not really. “So how was your day?”

“It could have been better. You didn’t get hurt?”

“Not particularly. The fall didn’t hurt you?”

She shook her head. “I think Twilight may have gotten hurt, though. I was with her when we did. What caused that?”

“A very bad error in judgment on my part. I spared someone that I should have killed. Now we don’t have a rudder and we don’t have a balloon. The elementals are ferrying us to the ocean and they might have to take us the rest of the way, too. But we got Pertz out alive, even if he’s pretty badly fucked up, so at least there’s that. Can you go find all of Twilight’s friends and fill them in on what’s going on, if they don’t already know? And tell them they’re free to go on deck for now, but head back below immediately if we get attacked.”

“I don’t mind, daddy. But I think Applejack and Rainbow Dash might be… busy.”

“Then don’t interrupt them. Twilight and Rarity should already know. Just let people know what’s what.”

“Alright. Where will you be when I’m done?”

“I need to drop my armor off to have it looked over, then deal with Pertz, and then I’m finding Doppel and continuing a discussion. When I’m done with all that, I’ll be back here.”

“Okay, daddy. I’ll see you when you’re done.” She hopped off the bed and walked out, brushing softly against me when she passed. Thankfully, she had the decency to pull the door shut behind her so I could get dressed without pervs trying to peep on me.

When I was done with that, I stuffed most of the armor in a bag and carried it down to the smithy. As much as I was initially against the idea of a mobile blacksmithing room, I’m really glad I let Watcher make it happen. The place was useful and if Jak ever finished his golem, I figured it would quickly pay for itself.

Smiles was in there, hammering out new bolt heads. The explosive rounds were irreplaceable without stuff we didn’t keep on hand, but they could start working on replacing the normal ones.

He was too absorbed in his work to look up when I entered and I didn’t want to risk interrupting him, so I waited until he quenched the bolt he was working on to ask, “Got a minute?”

He rubbed his forehead and turned around. “Yeah. What happened out there?”

“Pertz had to be convinced to come with us. And the villagers had to be convinced to let him go. I made a bad call and we suffered for it. But none of us died and none of us got seriously hurt, so whatevs. My armor did get banged up, though. Can you look at it whenever you get done with this stuff?”

He set the hammer down. “I can work on it now, if you need it. We can outsource labor for these bolts whenever we get to a friendly port for a few days.”

“Take your time. If I actually end up needing armor, I’ll use the carbon nanotube set. It’s stronger anyway, just less imposing. And thanks for the help today. You guys probably saved everyone from that elephant.” I could have tried to kill it, but my sword isn’t long and I didn’t have the naga’s ridiculous strength or size. And if the elephant had gotten past me, he would have trampled the others while they were distracted.

“Happy to help, but all I did was move the crank where Jak told me to.”

I shrugged. “Well, I was going to give you a hug, but if that’s all you did, I can give it to Jak instead. Where’s he?”

The poor guy actually looked really disappointed, so I almost felt bad about lying. But he kept talking anyway, so I figured he’d get over it. “On deck. He’s checking over the ballistas and helping with the mess.”

“Then I’ll leave him to it. I’d probably get a nasty sunburn really quickly out there, without the balloon or something covering me. Do you know how his golem is coming along?”

He shook his head. “He doesn’t tell me much about it. I don’t think he tells anypony much about it, actually.”

“He doesn’t. I also don’t really care, as long as I know it’s coming along. I can’t imagine he’s too happy about all the distractions.”

“He’s not. But I am. Being in that… that book for so long can’t be healthy.”

“It’s not. The lady inside is creepy and insane and the rules there are different. Shit’s weird. But whatever. Fix this armor up when you can and leave it in my room if the door’s open. It’s not a rush.”

He nodded. “Yes sir, I’ll get it done.” I left before he could walk over and grab the bag. After all, I didn’t want to hear him bitching about it still being covered in blood.

When I got into the hall, one of the soldiers was walking past. “Do you know where Pertz is?” I asked him.

“In the cargo hold, sir,” he said. “He’s got a full squad guarding him and I think Zecora and Kat are also with him.”

“Is he awake yet?”

“I don’t know. He looked hurt really bad, so I doubt it.”

“Tch, yeah. Bastard put up a fight. Guess I’ll go find out. Thanks.” He nodded and I went on down to the cargo hold.

Sure enough, a full squad was sitting on some of the boxes there. Two were playing dice and the third was watching Kat and Zecora. Or rather, I noticed after a moment that he was just staring at Kat’s ass. I couldn’t blame him, since it was a very cute ass. Kat was just standing over Pertz with her arms crossed, waiting. Zecora was digging through a bag of ingredients and muttering. The hole in the ship was to our right, on the bottom. I had a feeling that if the elementals hadn’t saved us, this ship would probably have been lost forever, along with all or most of us.

And Pertz was lying on the ground out cold. His legs were all tied together, his neck was chained to a hook on one side of the ship and his tail was chained to a hook on the other side. The fur was burned off most of his chest and back, his horn was cut off, there was a patched up hole in one of his shoulders, and he had a black eye. One of his ears had been sliced apart and my ring was placed in between the cuts. It looked like the flesh had been cauterized together afterwards, to make sure the ring couldn’t be easily removed.

“Any luck?” I asked when I was standing next to Zecora and Kat.

“I know of a potion that would keep him asleep for days at a time,” Zecora said, looking up at me. “But in his current wounded state, he’d likely never awaken. I believe I can make it milder and allow him to wake up sooner, but it cannot be used constantly; he will need a week to recover before he can safely drink it again.”

“How long we talkin’ here?” I asked.

“The stronger one… around five days. Six, if he’s this weak and can survive it. The weaker one would probably be three days. He would very likely survive that one.”

Kat purred and shook her head. “We went through too much trouble to take him alive for him to only very likely survive.”

“Gotta agree with Kat on this one,” I said. “Celestia wants him alive and he looks like absolute shit. Kinda forgot that potion made Spike super hot when I asked him to hold this bastard. He will survive these wounds, right?”

Zecora waved a hoof. “His wounds are easy. Nothing we did is fatal. Just very, very painful. He will likely wake up screaming.”

“Ugh. Bastard. At least we can gag him. I’d rather not hear his annoying voice again anyway. Alright, so potions aren’t an option. The ring should stop him, but I don’t want to risk the ship on a should. I might be able to use dream magic, but we don’t know what side effects that has.”

Flo spoke up using my mouth. “One of my sisters can keep him asleep, Nav. We can also help ensure that he survives his injuries.”

“Any objections?” I asked.

One of the guards spoke up, surprisingly. “Can these things leave a pony’s body, sir? If they’re stuck in him forever, it might affect them if he gets sent to Tartarus.”

“Nah, they can leave at will,” I said. “That won’t be an issue.”

“I have a concern,” Zecora said. “This stallion is insane and his will is strong. An elemental might find herself seeing things his way, if she is sympathetic enough.”

“What about three?” I asked. “If they had each other to keep themselves centered, it wouldn’t matter. And that’s definitely possible.”

Zecora nodded. “I believe that would be acceptable. Hopefully.”

“Alright. Anyone else?” They all shrugged. “Flo, would you kindly ask around and see who wouldn’t mind being a host to an evil dictator?” As soon as I finished asking that, three bursts of water flew up out of the hole in the ship and landed near us. They all immediately zoomed over to Pertz and flooded into him. “Guess girls really do have a thing for bad boys.” Flo slapped me in the back of the head, of course.

Once the elementals finished doing illicit things to his body, it immediately started healing. A single elemental accelerates the healing process. I guess three put it into overdrive, though they left large scars and none of his fur grew back.

Soon enough, his eyes opened. One was blue and one was pink. “So who’s in there?” I asked.

His face immediately looked conflicted, but soon both eyes went blue and he said, “River, Cascade, and Waterfall. This stallion’s mind is very… interesting.”

“Can you guys keep him unconscious indefinitely? And, you know, make sure he doesn’t die?”

“We can. Would you mind loosening these ropes? They’re cutting off circulation.”

“That’s the point,” I said. “If he manages to untie them, he won’t be able to go anywhere for a while. No offense to any of you, but this bastard is dangerous and unless he has a full one of you inside of him, I’m not going to risk untying him or making it easier for him to escape. Once we get to the coast, I’ll see about getting Celestia to expedite his trip home. Until then, just keep him alive.”

“Very well. But should his hooves become necrotic, we will take matters into our own hands. This stallion may be evil, but he is our charge, and we will not see him unnecessarily hurt.”

“Fair enough. But I’m trusting you guys to make sure he doesn’t become a threat. We risked a lot to get him out.”

His eyes turned pink and he actually smiled. “We won’t let you down.”

“Good. Then I’m done here. Zecora, if you think you can help patch up the ship’s balloon with any of your weird voodoo stuff, go lend a hand. Otherwise, do whatevs. Same for you, Kat. Well, minus the weird voodoo stuff.”

“Then I will go cleanse myself,” Kat said. “I detest being covered in blood. I just wish we had proper sweat tents.”

For those that don’t know (not there there should be anyone at all, you fucking dick bags), sweat tents are little saunas where the moisture and sweat collects on your skin and you scrub it off, taking the dirt with it. They stink and they suck. I had to deal with that shit when I was in Egypt the first time and it was unfun. I had no idea why cats liked them, since it didn’t work very well on fur.

At least we got her to stop licking herself in public.

“I believe I can assist with the balloon,” Zecora said. “Though it will likely be too badly damaged to do much until we reach a port.”

“Have some faith in Rarity. She’s mostly useless, but I’ve seen her work miracles with fabrics. And between her and Twilight, we can hopefully get something patched together that’ll let us get to the sky port in Canterlot instead of stranding us in fucking Europe for a week.”

“...Perhaps.” Honestly, I kinda doubted it too. Either way, the three of us left the guards to their charge. Zecora went up to the top deck, Kat went to her room, and I found Doppel in her room with the door open.

The maid outfit was on the bed and she was staring at it and stroking the hem. She looked up when I entered, but no kind of expression came on her face. “What happened with the ship?” she asked.

“The balloon got fucked. We just had to kill a lot of people. It was pretty bad. I don’t suppose you’d wanna do lewd things to me?”

“I…” She looked back down at her uniform and sighed. “Not now.”

God dammit, I didn’t actually want to continue this right now... “Do you need a hug?”

“I… I don’t know right now…” I stepped in and closed the door behind me, but didn’t make any further motions. After several more seconds, she sighed again and looked up at me. “When you brought that rogue changeling home, several things went through my mind. One thought was… how can she just turn her back on the hive like that? It’s our home! It’s where our loyalties absolutely must lie!”

“Doppel, home is where you make it, not where you were born.”

She looked back down at the outfit. “And when you married that changeling to the pony and I found out she decided to stay in Equestria forever, I thought the same thing, but I was starting to… see the merit.” Her eyes met mine again and it looked like they were watering up. “Chrysalis cast me aside, Nav. I was loyal to her and she told me to be your slave! And I obeyed without question. I hated it at first. It seemed like the worst assignment ever. But disobeying never crossed my mind.”

“Because you were loyal, or because you were afraid?”

She fell silent and looked to the window. After half a minute, she softly continued, “I met a changeling in Canterlot the last time we were there. He was… he was a royal guard. And he was openly and publicly a changeling.” Once again, her eyes returned to mine. “He taught me that we don’t have to be afraid of Chrysalis anymore. And now that we’re out of the hive, we don’t have to obey her anymore.”

“You’re damn right you don’t. I told you that a year ago.”

She shook her head. “You told me that, but I didn’t understand until just recently. That royal guard has contacts all across Equestria. He told me that changelings are defecting in droves. Chrysalis has lost at least half of her spies across just Equestria. From what he learned, one or two disappeared after they were poorly received, but almost all of them were accepted in their communities and then denounced Chrysalis. What you did by helping that changeling get married enabled dozens of us to come forward.”

“I had a feeling that would have some kind of consequences, but I wasn’t expecting that.”

“...None of us were. In the hive, the story is the other way around. Rumors about pony lynch mobs that attack those they discover are common. Same for all the other races.”

“Well, most of the other races were probably accurate.”

“They were. I was undercover in Gryphonia one day and one of our other agents got caught. They strapped her up in a public square and let everyone do what they wanted to her, then publicly boiled her alive at the end of the day.” Jesus. “But that’s starting to change. I feel… safe, now. Safe in disobeying her. Safe in leaving her. I… I don’t feel like I need the hive anymore. Going back there recently just cemented it. Nav, the hives are awful. And Chrysalis is evil. You should have let Celestia kill her. The changeling race would be better off without her.”

“Chrysalis is the one that wanted me to help those two changelings get married, Doppel. And she’s trying to change for the better. She very much regrets what she became. But until she does manage to turn her life around, she is still evil. Incredibly so. And she did mention wanting to bring you to the hive to recondition you.” She gripped the bed tightly. “But she decided against it.”

“She’s lying to you.”

I walked over to the bed and sat next to her so I could put a hand on her back. “It doesn’t matter if she is or isn’t, Doppel. Not right now, at least. Evil or not, she won’t hurt you. She won’t hurt any of the changelings that jumped ship. You’re safe to be you. You’re safe to do what you want. And while you’ll always have a place on this ship, you’re safe to leave it and find a place somewhere else.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Nav. And I know that if I’m on this ship, I have to follow your orders. But from now on, I’m doing it because I want to, not because Chrysalis told me to. She isn’t my queen anymore. And I’m done wearing this awful outfit.”

“...What if I order you to?” I slowly asked.

She smiled sweetly and then started tearing it up. When she was done, she looked over to me with a happy grin. “Then I’d tell you to shove it up your ass.”

I scooped her up in a hug. “Good answer. I was getting tired of French maid anyway. How about nurse? Or maybe schoolgirl?”

“If you keep this up, I’m turning into Taya when we’re in public and demanding you to fuck me. And if you started spanking me, I’d only beg you to do it harder.”

“You are sick and twisted and I love it. So what are you going to do with your newfound sense of freedom?”

“I dunno. I’ve never been free before.” She finally hugged me back and we sat there for several long and awkward seconds. “So uh… what do you do with your freedom?”

“Whatever I want, mostly. You know, topped with an unhealthy dose of doing whatever Celestia tells me because she can make my life absolute hell if she wants. You could find someone to date, fall in love with, and maybe have kids. Don’t know if you’re really into that.”

“No, I hate hatchlings… I might be willing to adopt, but probably not. I guess I don’t really know what I want to do…”

“Well, you’re welcome here until you figure it out. Your talents are really useful. And I don’t just mean that thing you do with your tongue.”

To answer that, she stuck that same tongue into my ear, making me squirm. She sucked it back in with a giggle and said, “I know what you meant, silly. But you haven’t had much for me to do lately…”

“Yeah, these last few encounters have been real shitshows. In general, I’d much rather have your services than Kat’s. Avoiding a fight is usually better than instigating one.”

“You know, you could have used me today…”

“Maybe. But I don’t think this one was avoidable. This shit was bananas. Pertz is insane and he needed to get his shit wrecked. Hopefully he’ll be a little more humble now. But if not, whatever. We’ll deliver his ass to Celestia and he’ll no longer be our problem. But I’m hoping to find more jobs for you in the future.”

“Having a purpose is always nice… And I think I’ll try to cut back on the mindless sex. I can’t live my entire life in a… a haze of pleasure and numbness. And soreness, too. Plenty of that, after four or five partners a day…”

“Jesus, I couldn’t imagine that. One particularly rough stallion was enough to leave me sore for a full day.” And the full orgy of changelings also left me walking funny for a little while. “Anyway, if you’ve taken to abstaining, I think I’m going to go find Pinkie. I always feel hollow after a battle and getting filled up helps. With the elementals and Twilight busy, she’s pretty much my last bet.”

“I would, but I was just with a mare a few hours ago and a gay stallion shortly after that, so I probably couldn’t get it up as a male right now anyway. And I have no toys, so I can’t really fill you up, so to say… I know you prefer mares, but you moan a lot more when I have more… natural equipment.”

“God dammit, I need more guys on this ship to fuck… You have it easy, what with being able to bang any of the soldiers or crew.”

She giggled and rubbed my back. “There’s always Sunshine Smiles! I think he really likes you...”

“No.”

“What about the captain? He’s about your equal in rank here, isn’t he?”

“Iffy, but doable. But he’s also usually busy. Those two are pretty much it. Jak wouldn’t be interested, I’m not interested in Spike and I honestly shouldn’t do anything with him anyway, and the rest are married, too far below me, or also not interested. It’s lonely at the top, I guess.”

“...Well, there’s Twilight, at least. I know she’s interested, given the questions she’s asked me about you.”

That gave me pause. “She was… asking questions?”

“Yeah. About your fetishes and what really gets you off, mostly. I thought it would lead to something funny, so I told her everything.”

I really need to choose my servants better. “She’s been experimenting. She doesn’t know much about sexuality and has been trying to… discover herself, so to say. There’s certainly advantages to having sex with her, but there are also downsides. But she’s also busy and currently without magic… Anyway, I guess I should just head back to my room and lament not being pretty enough. I’m sure you have more moping to do or something.”

She didn’t let go when I did, though. “I don’t mind helping you get off, Nav. I just can’t use what I know you want. But I promise it’ll still feel good!”

I sighed, rolled my eyes, and started pulling off my pants.

An undisclosed amount of time later, I was back in my room and feeling marginally better. Since I had nothing to hide at the moment, my door was open and I was just chilling on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

I gotta say, I was kinda surprised Applejack was the first one to join me. She probably stood at the door for a while before realizing I wasn’t paying any kind of attention, then finally stepped inside and quietly cleared her throat.

After blinking and realizing I wasn’t alone, I slowly looked her way. She was out of her armor and had nothing on at the moment. No hat, no hair bands. It was honestly somewhat disconcerting. The slightly manic look in her eyes also didn’t help.

So I sat up and patted the bed next to me. She eyed it for a moment and then slowly and achingly joined me.

We sat in silence for a few minutes.

Finally, I quietly said, “Duty is heavy.”

Another minute passed by.

She gently coughed and whispered, “Yep.”

I put my hand on her back. She shivered slightly. I continued, “It is the heaviest thing there is. And you can never have the luxury of saying you were only following orders, because you still chose to follow them.”

Her body pressed against mine.

“We don’t kill because we want to, Applejack. And we don’t kill because we like it. We don’t kill for sport and we don’t kill for fun. We kill… we do our duty because it’s the right thing to do.”

Her head fell onto the bed.

“There are no words that will make this feel better. Don’t think I’m trying to assuage your guilt. Or that I’m trying to comfort you. But Pertz was and is evil. He needed to be brought to justice. And those villagers were an obstacle in our way.”

She sniffled.

“And god help us both, but we’ll never forget them. You more than me, I know. My first still haunts me. I can still see his eyes, feel his spastic movements… It’s not something you forget. The pain dulls with time and it stops hurting as much when you do it more.”

It was quiet, but I heard her crying. I started rubbing her back.

“But the pain is good. It reminds you that you still care. It reminds you that you’re still normal. It means you can still go back. It sucks, I know. And you’ll remember it in your dreams and you’ll remember it when you’re trying to eat and you’ll remember it when you get home and you’ll remember it when you fall in love and you’ll remember it until you die.”

It was no longer quiet. That back rub turned into a hug.

“Being a predator helps for me, I think. I have the ability to disconnect. I don’t have to think about it in terms of killing a person. I just think of it as stopping an annoying problem. I still… I still think about it sometimes, but for the most part, I don’t feel sad about it anymore.”

At least she hugged me back, though it was uncomfortably tight.

“I know you don’t like me, and you have every reason not to. You have an inordinately good lie detector and everything about me is a lie. But that means you should know that I’m telling the truth here. Unfortunately, the truth isn’t very comforting.”

Rocking back and forth seemed a little unwarranted, but I wasn’t going to deny her anything at the moment.

“But the real truth is that you did your duty. You did it well. You followed my orders and you followed them well. And those orders made you do something unforgivable. But it’s not too late to take that armor off forever, Applejack. Absolutely no one here will say a word. We aren’t hurting badly enough for troops for me to ask you to compromise yourself.”

Silence fell on us once again.

It took her some time to stop crying. When she finally did, she let me go and slid off the bed. She stood there for several long seconds before walking to the door, where she stopped again. Finally, she turned her head to me. “Duty may be heavy, but I’m strong.” With that, she walked out.

Flo sighed in relief. “You handled that so much better than you handled Twilight.”

I know, right? Though a little bit less is at stake right this second than when I had to help Twilight.

“True. But when she tried to talk after the fact, you pawned her off on Aqua.”

Fair point. I guess it’s that whole ‘trying to change’ thing I’m doing, or something.

“Good.”

My next visitor was Spike, who was grinning and holding a plate. He casually leaned against my door frame. “Yo Nav, you hungry?”

“Not particularly,” I said to the ceiling, since I was back to laying down. “But I know I should eat. Is the kitchen chick working?”

“Nah, Sunny’s on deck. Gilda made this.”

That actually made me look his way. “Gilda?”

“Yeah. She’s a pretty good cook, actually.”

“...I know. She retaught me how to cook meat.” I finally sat up. “But it was a bitch and a half to get her to. I’m surprised she actually decided to cook.”

He chuckled and shrugged. “She made a bet. First one to finish cooks. I won. So yeah, I decided to take your advice.”

“Cool, cool. Which advice, again?”

His brows (or what would be his brows, if he had hair) furrowed, then the look of confusion disappeared. “I forgot that you don’t remember any of that. When you were out of it, you told me to uh… tame her. I figured, you know, she was into it and it would probably be fun, so I went for it. And, you know, actually went for it.”

“Neat. I’m too ugly for even Doppel, so I’ve just been in here, alone.”

“Huh. So yeah, you hungry?” Good, he doesn’t want to fuck me anymore.

“Yeah.” He walked the rest of the way in to hand me the plate. Unsurprisingly, it was just meat. Gilda didn’t seem to like cooking anything else. Or maybe she didn’t know how to. Spike started to walk out, so I said, “Hold on.”

He turned back. “What do you need?”

“We just killed a lot of people, Spike. I know you’re more of a predator than me, so it probably doesn’t affect you the same way, but if you ever need to talk, talk to me. If you let stuff like that brood inside of you, it’ll sap away at you. Trust me, I know from experience.”

The following silence wasn’t exactly the most comfortable thing I felt that day. Which is saying something, given that I just got done fighting.

Finally, he shrugged and said, “I think I’m okay.”

“Alright, cool. But if you’re lying because you don’t want to disappoint me or make me not want to rely on you, not cool.”

He shook his head. “No, I really think I’m fine. It felt good. Before that duel, I was worried and scared. But after that, I… knew. I knew that it was right. And I wasn’t worried or scared anymore.” He fell silent for a few seconds before pushing the door closed. “I was raised by ponies, Nav. For the longest time, I felt like I didn’t belong. I knew I was too different. But today, for the first time ever, I felt right. I felt like…” After floundering for words, he took a deep breath and slowly exhaled it as steam. “I felt like a dragon! My blood was boiling in that fight! I really, truly, finally felt alive!”

Oh. That’s not something I foresaw. “Good. But never for a moment, and I cannot emphasize this enough, never forget who you are, Spike. Never lose yourself to the bloodlust. Because it’s easy to do. Slipping away in a fight is the simplest thing in the world. But if you start becoming a threat to your friends, I can’t have you fighting with us. I’m happy that you feel right. That’s a good thing. But not everything that you were should be forgotten. Ponies have some good ideals. Dragons have some bad ones. Let the pony ideals guide your draconic nature.”

He just stared at me for a little while before saying, “That’s pretty gay, dude.”

“Go fuck yourself. Thanks for the food.”

“No problem. See you later.” He finally left and I started eating.

Taya finally rejoined me some time after he left. When she stepped in, I looked over to see who was joining me next. “I figured you would have been waiting on me.”

After hopping up to join me in the bed, she said, “I thought your session with Doppel would take longer. Guess she’s losing her touch.”

“No, she said I’m not pretty enough and sent me away.”

“Daddy, you’re beautiful,” she said with a gentle nuzzle.

“At least someone thinks so.” I scooped her up and draped her across me. “Anything interesting happen?”

“Well, as soon as I told Pinkie she could go out on deck, she disappeared. It was kinda weird. Fluttershy also went up, but she just walked. Twilight and Rarity are looking over the balloon now, but I don’t think they’ll have much luck. It looked pretty damaged.”

“That’s because it’s pretty damaged.” I sighed and relaxed slightly. “It might be a long trip home.”

“Well… once we can use magic again, we could probably teleport to a city and get what we need to fix it, right?”

“Teleporting that far will be a pretty tall order. We’ll see. It’ll probably take the waters a few days to decide what to do next anyway, so this will give them time. And as long as Celestia can get Pertz out of here as soon as we can send her a message, it shouldn’t matter too much anyway. I know I wouldn’t mind a few days of not being on constant alert.”

“And I wouldn’t mind spending a few days with you…”

And that’s just what happened.

We got to the coast on the third day of traveling. It was really early in the morning, so just about everyone important was asleep, since we had run into no trouble yet. I was on the deck, casually sharpening one of my knives and watching the approaching gorilla village. There’d be no avoiding them, this time. Not if we wanted to spend some time getting our shit fixed before hitting open water.

As soon as we got to the estuary, the cute unicorn mare that wanted my moist vag walked over to me. “My magic is back, Nav.” To show off, she pulled one of my sheathed throwing knives out and started waving it around.

“Excellent. When can you guys start patching the hole in the hull?”

“As soon as Captain Gourd and the others wake up.” She carefully put my knife back up. “When can you send a message to the princess to let her know we need help?”

“Around the time she wakes up. It’s, like, six in the morning or something here. That means it’s midnight there. Even if the message did wake her lazy ass up, she probably wouldn’t have the strength to teleport here and then get back at night. I’d prefer not hitting the ocean until she knows where we are and what’s going on, so we might as well let the others sleep for now.”

“Alrighty! What do you think we should do about the village?”

“Watch them. I doubt they’ll automatically be hostile. If they send a delegation over, we’ll talk. If not, I’m happy to ignore them.”

“...What happens if they try to kidnap you?”

“Their village is right there. If they try anything, we can turn them into dust. Besides, that happened because of Brook. Those monkeys didn’t revere humans on their own. I see no reason why these guys would.”

She looked over that way for a few seconds before shrugging. “I guess that makes sense. And wouldn’t they want Pertz gone, anyway?”

“Dunno. It might not affect them all the way over here.”

One of the guards we rescued happened to be on duty at that time and wandered our way when he heard us talking. “Those villagers are harmless, ma’am,” he told me. “Well, to us, anyway. They have no interest in provoking the ponies.”

“Think they’d try to talk to us if we sat next to them for a few hours?”

“Probably. They might offer to trade assistance or wood for various goods, if they’re in a decent mood. Silver knows more about them than we do, so she can probably tell you more. Well, if you can get her to come out of her room.”

“I imagine she’ll come out as soon as I stop sending food to her. But I honestly don’t care about them or their culture. If they can be useful, good. If not, they can stay out of my way. I think we have everything we need to patch the hole in the ship. None of us know how to fix the rudder, so extra supplies are useless. And I really doubt they’d have what we need to repair the balloon, so they’d be worthless on that front.”

The guard shrugged. “I just wanted to see her smile again. She’s always happy to talk about something she knows pretty well.”

Yep, sounds like a woman. “Feel free to ask her, if you want. Either way, I’m not worried about them.” The ship finally started slowing down. We were right next to the beach, close enough that we could easily get a group ashore if we needed to. And since those of us with wings could use them again, it would be even easier. “Amber, if those lazy bastards are still asleep in two hours, wake them up. Then wake up Rarity and tell her to do whatever she can to the balloon.”

“Okay. What should I do until then?”

“I dunno. Whatever you usually do, I guess.” I put the blade I was sharpening away and pocketed the stone I was using to grind it. “Me, I think I need to have a discussion with Brook. Flo, would you mind asking her to meet me in the map room?”

She murmured an assent, so Amber and the guard got to watch me walk away.

“So how do you think this is going to go?” I asked Flo.

“Honestly, I’m not really sure where any of us stand. Most of us are still undecided.”

“Hmm.”

Brook arrived in the map room shortly after I did. As soon as she oozed in, she ran a hand along one of the ship’s walls. “This boat is heavy.”

“I imagine. Can you get us to a friendly port, if we can’t fix our balloon?”

“Yes, but the going will be slower now that the chances of attack are much lower. That pace was exhausting and I don’t think there’s a pirate alive that would attack a ship crewed like this, or armed and armored like this one.”

“Excellent.” The next part of that conversation would likely be decidedly more difficult than a status report, so I decided to go ahead and take the only chair in the room, then wait for her to look at me with her slightly pink eyes. “What are you going to do about the fires?”

That pink drained away immediately. “My sisters and I will reach a consensus. That consensus is that we will help you. But we have not reached it yet, so until we do, we will not assist you in searching for them or saving them.”

I couldn’t stop my hands from steepling in front of me. “You all knew this was coming.”

“Just as we knew the sun would rise for the coming day, or that the tide would roll in. One does not typically stop to consider that which is inevitable, even if it affects them. Yes, we knew this was coming. And we dreaded it and we feared it. We didn’t want to think of it. And now the time is here and we must decide. And we must decide to help you. And we will decide to help you, even if it’s a… dangerous decision.”

“And do you consider doing nothing a better proposal?”

She slid over to one of the small windows and stared out at the African landscape. “Chaos has shown its hand. But it has not been… overly active in this cycle, so to say. Flo has shown us your interactions with it, and we have begun tracing threads.” Her head turned to me and her eyes flashed yellow. “Some threads we see have been extremely troubling.” With that, she actually started pacing. “Some of my sisters debate that biding our time is wiser than freeing the fires. Ever since you convinced me to leave my home, however, I agreed that they needed to be free.”

“Well, at least that’s two of you. And I know Aerie is down for it, so we can use her to find the bastards. But we’ll need the support of all of you guys to free them, according to what Flo was saying.”

“That is correct, though we have ascertained that one is actually currently free. And we know where the other two are, but we won’t tell you until we’ve decided to assist you.”

“Not that it would matter, given how crippled we are. Unless one happens to be at a nearby port or something. But nothing’s ever that easy.”

She finally stopped sliding back and forth across the floor, at least. It was kinda weird, since she didn’t actually turn when she got to a wall, her entire body just reformed so that it was facing the other direction. “I do not believe deliberations will take us too long. We all know that it’s the right thing to do, whether or not it will help stop Chaos. Our fiery siblings are violent and destructive, but their tendencies can be curbed. We will not be a part of freeing the airs.”

“Okay. Now, if Celestia—”

“That is not a point you wish to debate?” she broke in.

“It’s not. Now, if Celestia can’t get Pertz off the ship, would you prefer moving us across the Atlantic or up to Europe?”

It sounded like she wasn’t expecting me to just accept them not breaking out the airs. But she didn’t want to look that particular gift horse in the mouth, so she just said, “Moving up to Europe. Three of my sisters can keep him placated indefinitely, though they might eventually start to sympathize with him. Since he will not be an issue, I believe it wiser to get the ship to a port sooner rather than later, in case there is more damage than we realized and we worsen it.”

“Fair enough. Can you guys actually get tired?”

“Yes, though it’s not as a living being would. That is another reason I’d prefer Europe.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do. And if she does teleport Pertz away, we won’t even have to stop in Canterlot to head to the first fire. Which means no more pointless bullshit.”

As it turns out, I should learn not to open my fucking mouth.

“Hm. Will she give us some manner of reward for capturing him?”

“Man, I don’t fucking know. It’s not like you guys need money and I’m still hella loaded. I guess the crew could always use more.”

“We don’t need money, but independence, perhaps…” Her eyes flashed yellow, red, green, and then faded back to blue. “My sisters and I have no desire to end up as a part of her kingdom. We are too used to ruling to be ruled and have no desire to be told what we may or may not do.”

“I assume Flo told you some of my plans for the future.”

And her eyes flashed another set of colors, ending in pink. “She has. I would be delighted to assist humanity in rebuilding from the ashes. I would not accept being turned into a slave. I believe none of us would.” Her eyes flashed blue again and then she rolled them. “Well, most of us wouldn’t.”

“In my experience, slaves rarely work as well as those that help you willingly and happily. But I can’t dictate what other people will do.”

She finally smiled. “That’s a very wise statement. We will deal with the future as it comes. You are still undecided about whether you will attempt to bring humans back to life or not. It is understandable to be… concerned with its possible effects on the world. You humans are incredibly unpredictable, though I admit to having known very few of you.”

I snorted. “Well, according to the last ones I saw, I’m no longer human. So it’s not really ‘you humans’ anymore.”

She reached an arm across the room to press against my cheek. “Being human is much more than looking like one, Nav. It’s a mentality, a mindset. It’s a way of thinking that’s utterly alien to those that live today. Despite what you may have been told, you are very much still a human.”

“Being human also means being exclusionary, and if other humans choose to exclude you, you become something else.”

I tried pulling away from her hand, but she moved her other one to my other cheek. “Part of being happy is having a stable identity, Nav. You turned your back on being Anonymous. You don’t have to allow others to deny you your humanity.”

Man, people really like telling me stuff that I already know. “Brook, I’m really not down with all that Aesop shit. Or the whole physical contact thing. Those are both Twilight’s shtick.” She slowly pulled her hands away. “I mean, I appreciate the gesture and whatever. Shows you care or something like that, I don’t know. Either way, I ain’t about that life.”

She looked at me for a few seconds before her eyes flashed orange, whatever that meant. “You are not interested in bettering yourself, Nav? You don’t care for healing your shattered mind?”

“Well I mean, I do, but like, you know, not like that. That’s shit’s annoying, man. It feels patronizing.”

“...I see. And do you have a reasoning as to why?” I shrugged. “Hm. Perhaps I should have a conversation with Flo about what you do and do not find acceptable, and why.”

Flo actually took over my mouth to say, “It feels to him like you’re speaking down to him from an imagined position of authority instead of treating him like an equal.”

That actually seemed to take Brook aback, though it did make some sense to me. Brook took several seconds to process that before saying, “When the wise give advice to those who need it, they speak from a true position of authority to one that needs help.”

Thankfully, Flo handled the rebuttal for me. “When the wise are ignorant in other ways, they too need wisdom. It should be equally shared, not meted out like a pittance to those clamoring for succor. And the way you act is motherly, which he despises because it makes him feel weak and small.” Alright, this is starting to get annoying. “And he’s getting annoyed because I’m sharing what he considers his weaknesses with you.” You fucking bitch. “He also just called me a naughty word.” Kill yourself. “And told me to kill myself. If I continued sharing his unpleasant thoughts, we’d probably be stuck in a very long loop.”

“Interesting. That answers several questions I had about his childhood.” You don’t know me, bitch. “I imagine he has a very unpleasant thought when I said that, too.” Flo forced me to nod. “Very interesting indeed. Navarone, know that when a water elemental tries to give you advice, we do so solely for your benefit. We mean absolutely no offense by it.”

I kind of wanted to answer that, but Flo didn’t let me. “He knows, intellectually. But it still rankles because of several deep-seated issues he has yet to open up about and refuses to discuss with me.” Woman, I swear to god! “He’s getting really mad. I think I’ll stop.”

“Anger is good,” Brook said with a small nod. “You rarely show strong emotions because you bottle them up out of fear. You should learn to release that floodgate. The defining characteristic of a man is not the inability to show emotion, but rather the ability to show it wisely. You choose to hide it until it breaks your dam and dangerously spills over. Learn to use your emotions when and where you need them.”

“I don’t need them. That’s why I don’t show them.”

She smiled ever so sweetly. “Tell that to Taya.”

The urge to find out if a water elemental could be strangled was growing quite quickly. Unfortunately, I knew that doing so would likely be unwise, so I forced myself to continue sitting there instead. So I tried a different tactic. “I don’t exactly have the best roadmap in the world for knowing when to show emotions.”

She lifted what would have been an eyebrow if she had hair. “The ponies aren’t good examples, then? It seems like they would be, to me.”

Fuck. “I didn’t exactly have the best home training for knowing when to and when not to show emotions, I should say.”

“Much of what happens in your formative years affects how you become as a person. However, it doesn’t write your personality in stone. People can and do change, Nav. I’m sure you know that well from your dealings with Twilight. It isn’t easy and admitting that it’s necessary can be difficult. Thankfully, I believe that you already did so. Now you just need to start attempting to live up to it.”

“Ugh, can’t I just do it tomorrow?” Her smile deepened slightly. “Alright, look, I don’t like bitches riding my ass about this shit. Yeah, I do want to get better or whatever. But I can’t just jump headlong into being something that I’m not. I want to feel again, but it’s not something I can just force. It’ll be gradual. So unwad your fucking panties and don’t bitch about it.”

“Reminders and helpful suggestions are not bitching, silly.”

“They never seem that way to the person doing it. But that’s the kind of shit that invites wife-beating. When someone spends all day being shit on, sometimes they just want some time of peace. I do want to change and I probably appreciate the help or whatever, but let me do me.”

Her smile cracked just slightly. “I am… unused to sitting by and watching, Nav. Usually, we take a direct hand in assisting others.”

“I’m sure you’ll manage.” I stood and popped my neck. “I’m heading back to the deck. Ask one elemental to keep the hole in the deck plugged. The rest can do whatever they normally do. I have an unfortunate feeling that we’ll be needing them again soon.”

“Likely. Would you be interested in meeting the sister we freed?”

“Anything particularly special about her?” I asked.

“She is a loner, which is why she was here when she became trapped. Even now, aside from thanking us for our assistance, she has said little.”

“Then she’ll have little to say to me. I’ll meet her when I meet her.” She finally let me leave the office in peace, though she did watch me while I exited. Flo, your sisters are really creepy sometimes. She sighed judgmentally, but didn’t say anything.

When I finally got back on the deck, the coastal village was stirring and the guard squads were currently changing over. Watcher and Spike noticed me at the same time, but Spike got there first. “What do you want me to send to Princess Celestia?” he asked.

“Nothing at the moment. She’s still asleep.”

He blinked. “But it’s morning.”

Watcher got to hear that one, and replied, “It’s morning here. There, it’s probably around one or two in the morning.”

“And Celestia rises with the sun,” I said. “It’s… late fall now, I think, so that’ll probably be around seven or something, so another six hours. I’ll have a report written for you by then. Just chill for now.”

“Uh. Alright, I guess. Find me when you need me.” He wandered off to do his guard duty, not that I really figured we needed it anymore.

That made it Watcher’s turn. “Zecora and I both want to send a delegation to the village. We want to show them Pertz. And we want you to be there as well, as the person that is bringing him to justice.”

“Tell your squad to test their magic thoroughly first. If it all works, find two elementals to ferry Pertz over. I’ll take the squad guarding him, the naga, and Zecora. Watch us from here. If shit hits the fan, the elementals will probably get to us before you can, but I want you to at least try to help.”

“You agreed to that more quickly than I thought you would.”

“Okay. Let me know when all of that is done.”

He shrugged and said, “Yes sir.” He walked back below and I pulled my gun up to check it over. It still looked fine, so I slung it and walked over to the naga.

“We’re going into the village soon,” I said. “I’m not expecting a fight, but be ready.”

“Of course. I would be interested in seeing how more of these beasts fight. The last one was quite a disappointment.”

“And we’re not going to bring that last one up, either. I have no idea how they’d feel about us killing one of them, even if he was working with Pertz.”

He made a rumbling noise deep in his chest before nodding. “A wise decision. Some surface groups seem to take race loyalty too far, even for those who turned their back on the clan.”

“Sometimes. I imagine Pertz is gonna get shafted by the law, though.” And then shafted by a bunch of horny changelings. “We’ll be leaving when Watcher gets his group ready. If you need anything else, now’s the time to get it.”

“I am battle ready, sister.”

“Good.” When I turned to walk away, Gourd was standing there, waiting. “Status?”

“We’ve started repairing the hull. It should be ready within five hours. And unfortunately, Rarity says she can’t do anything useful with the balloon. She could patch it, but enough of it was destroyed that even patching it wouldn’t give us enough lift to get us back in the air, let alone keep us there.”

“Fuck. Talk to one of the elementals and chart a course to the closest port in Europe that can fix this mess.”

“I have an… alternative, if you’re willing to take a risk. There’s a pirate capital—”

“No.”

He nodded, smiling. “Europe it is. I didn’t really want to go back there anyway. I’ll get a course plotted soon. Should we leave as soon as we get the hull fixed?”

“Probably. We’re sending a shore party to the village. Zecora’s idea. It hopefully won’t take too long.”

“Alright. You want any of us to go with you?”

“Nah. We should be fine. Hopefully they’ll be happy enough to see Pertz in chains that they won’t think of doing anything retarded.”

He bit at the inside of his lip before shrugging. “You’re the boss. We’ll keep an eye on you and teleport over if it starts looking bad.”

“Works for me. Just don’t forget that you’re out of practice.”

He snorted. “Not after what happened to Amber. I’ll go check on repairs and then find an elemental. See you later, Nav.” I nodded and he walked off, letting me finally pick a spot on the rail and watch the villagers as they watched us.

A cleared throat from behind me got my attention, so I turned and beheld the purplest member of my crew. “What do you need, Twilight?” I asked.

“One of the guards told me you were going into the village,” she said. “Can I go with you?”

“Sure. Stay close to me. If shit gets bad, back me up. And try not to offend the locals. You know the drill.”

“Yeah. I’ll try not to ask too many questions.”

“Then let’s go get ready. I have one more thing to grab.”

“Okay!” She started happily trotting below and I followed behind her, watching her tail bounce. What I needed to grab wasn’t in my room, so I just followed her right to hers. When she got there, she grabbed a notepad and a pen with magic and then blinked. “I forgot I had magic! I could have just teleported this up.” Then she turned and saw me. “Oh, did you already get what you needed?”

“Not quite,” I said with a small smile. When I stepped in and closed the door behind me, a look of concern flashed across her face. “Do you remember our little deal?” I asked.

“Um. Which one?”

“If I wear the plug, you have to wear a vibe once a week.” Her face fell and her eyes opened wide. “Well, it’s been a long week and I had to fight a fucking battle wearing it, and trip balls with it in. I think it’s your turn.”

Both of her ears drooped. “I… I um… Maybe I uh… shouldn’t go…”

“Nope, you’re going.” I walked over to one of her drawers and rummaged around until I found the cute little buzzer. “And you’re going wearing this. And I’m going holding this.” I pulled out the remote. “So go ahead and finish getting ready.”

She quietly gulped, then used magic to pull the toy away from me. “Are… are you sure?”

“Yes. And you’ll be wearing it the next time we see Celestia, too. And a bunch of other awkward times. So might as well get used to it now.” She sighed and floated it behind her. A few seconds later, I stroked the controls, making her squeak. “Alright, let’s go.” I left it on low for the moment, so we couldn’t hear it. Or at least, I couldn’t.

“Okay…” We walked back to the deck. As soon as she got to the stairs, I bumped it up to medium and she almost slipped. She chose not to comment. It went back to low and I figured I’d leave her alone for a while.

Watcher was not idle in that time, thankfully. His squad was ready to go and came to attention when I approached. Pertz was standing next to Flo and Naiad. Zecora was watching the village. The naga was staring at Pertz.

“Any intel about them, Zecora?” I asked.

“I stayed there for a day after I was cast out, on my way to finding passage away from here. They are friendly enough, but territorial. Do not enter any building without permission and do not touch anything without it being offered. They did not like Pertz, and will be happy to see him in chains. If they ask us to leave, we will leave without question.”

“Simple enough. Can we fly right to the village, or should we head to the outskirt first and walk in?”

“Walk in, in case they ask us not to enter.”

“I’ll fly over. Naga, you swim. Twilight, teleport with Zecora when you see where I’m going. Flo, Naiad, you do your thing with Pertz. You three, dynamic entry.” Nods all around, so I took off and rode the coastal winds to a spot near the edge of the village, next to the river.

As soon as I landed, Twilight joined me with Zecora. The guard pegasus dropped the earth horse right as the unicorn teleported in. Ames and the two elementals showed up seconds later. The two elementals held Pertz up by his forelegs so it didn’t look like he had any kind of freedom of movement.

Before I could ask Zecora what to do next, two very large gorillas came thundering out of the village toward us. Zecora didn’t seem overly concerned, so I didn’t move. Sure enough, they stopped in front of us. “What is your business here?” one of them asked.

Zecora stepped forward and said, “We come bearing news. Pertz of Equestria has been dethroned. See him stripped of his power.” She waved behind her. The gorillas both looked and gaped, showing off some impressive teeth. “Navarone of Equestria has brought him to his knees.” Not really of Equestria, but okay.

“Is this truly the scourge of the heartlands?” one whispered, taking a small step closer.

“It is,” I said. “Or rather, was. Princess Celestia of Equestria discovered that he has been abusing the trust she placed in him and sent me and my crew to bring this monster home, to face justice. After I beat him in single combat and we eradicated the majority of his slaves, we are finally ready to drag him back to Equestria.”

One slowly nodded. “It is good to see this blight brought down.” His large eyes focused on mine and I suddenly found myself wishing I wasn’t in plain clothing. “And you are the one that defeated him?”

“Yes. I have skills tailor-made to take down arrogant unicorns.”

“We would love to hear the tale. You are all welcome into our village. Please, follow us.” As much as I really didn’t want to tell the story, I figured following them anyway would be prudent. No reason to make enemies, after all. So we followed them. I took point, with Zecora on one side and Twilight on the other. The elementals oozed behind us and the guard squad treaded behind them. Ames slid along next to the two sisters, grimacing slightly to himself at the feeling of wet dirt getting stuck to his tail.

“We saw your ship when you first showed up,” one of the gorillas said. “It appeared magnificent then, and we thought it heralded some manner of change.”

“It took a beating from their witch doctor,” I replied. “We’re taking time now to patch it up as best we can before we limp to a friendly port.”

“We will likely be happy to assist,” one said. “Though I doubt there is much we can do to help with such a vessel.”

“The thought is appreciated,” Zecora said. I’m glad she spoke up, because I wasn’t planning on replying to them.

When we got to the village, we picked up a ton of stares. The village wasn’t all that large, but it seemed that each hut had several people living in it, and they were all interested in who (and what) we were. The two leading us further into the village didn’t say anything, so none of us spoke either.

Before too long, we reached the center of the village, where the largest hut was. Standing in front of it was a gorilla that stood about as tall as the naga with shoulders just as wide. Honestly, if that thing tried attacking me, I think I’d prefer to fly away, magic sword or not. He didn’t look very happy to see us, either.

“Why have you brought these interlopers to me?” he demanded.

The two gorillas bowed and one said, “They bring Pertz in chains, Kerchak!”

That got his attention, of course. He looked over them to the only one of us in chains. “Is this truly the great defiler?” he whispered.

“It is,” I said. “Princess Celestia sent us to capture him when she learned of his actions.”

He snorted. “At least the pony queen can remedy some of her mistakes. What is your name, lady warrior?”

“I am Navarone, sir,” I said, nodding my head. “I pacified Pertz and my host of warriors eradicated many of his soldiers, freeing several captives in the process.”

He leaned back slightly. “You pacified Pertz alone?”

“I did. And I led the warriors who killed many of his troops.”

“Hm. And you freed the true king of the lions. It will be interesting to see the coming power struggles. This is welcome news. But I am very interested in how such a small being could capture someone so powerful. Of course, I’m also interested in just what you are. I have never seen one like you. Or the watery things holding that monster.”

“I am a human,” I said. “A magical mistake brought me here from the past. My kind has long since died out.”

“Hm. My condolences, human. I imagine being isolated in such a way is… painful.”

There was no need to reply to that, so I waved my hand behind me. “These are water elementals. Very intelligent, very kind, very dangerous, and very useful. They can form symbiotic relationships with various beings, directly helping them. They are also figments of the past, brought forth once more.”

A tendril from each elemental moved forward, making the large gorilla jump back in shock. “I am Naiad, and this is Flo,” she said. Since Kerchak didn’t seem interested in shaking hands, the tendrils interweaved before slurping back into their bodies. “We assist Navarone out of thanks for saving us.”

Kerchak stared at them for several long seconds before slowly saying, “We live in interesting times.”

The naga chuckled and said, “Those who live in interesting times create tales of glory to be shared for generations.”

That made the gorilla nod, at least. “True. And how the great kings in interesting times interact with those around them sets examples for those to follow. Would you be interested in telling the story of your fight, human?”

“...Well, I am no storyteller. I could tell you of the deed, but it would not be interesting.” I really didn’t want to have to talk about that shit.

“I am,” Zecora quickly said. “And I would be happy to.”

The big dude actually smiled. “A story about a glorious fight told by a shaman. By all means.” He looked at one of the fellows that led us in and said, “Gather the young ones. We are going to hear the tale of how Pertz was brought down.”

I turned to the elementals and said, “Take him back to the ship. You’re free to come back when he’s secured again.” They nodded and started leaving, dragging Pertz with them.

“Why take him away?” Kerchak asked. “He looks pacified to me.”

“I didn’t fly for three weeks, risk my life and the lives of all my crew, and nearly have my boat destroyed to come back empty-handed because he managed to slip away or we had to kill him because he started acting up. I’d rather have him properly secured.”

“Wise. All of you, come with me.” He started walking to the left. The dude had a pretty large gait, so we had to move fairly fast to keep up. It meant we got to our destination faster, though. It was a decently sized clearing in the village. A group of peasants was already starting to fill in the edges. From the look of it, they were expecting their story-teller to sit in the center.

Sure enough, Zecora walked right to the middle of the group. She knew how to tell stories far better than I did, so I happily left her to it. Kerchak also went to the center. The rest of my group stayed on one of the edges.

When enough villagers showed up, Kerchak slammed his fists on his chest a few times, then said, “Pertz has been defeated!” The gorillas all cheered and started banging their chests like he did. When they quieted down, he pointed at me. “This human warrior is the one that brought Pertz to his knees. She is called Navarone, and has delivered this land from a dark curse.” The apes started whispering. I heard the word ‘she’ several times. He plowed over the mutters. “Her shaman is here to tell the tale of the monster’s defeat.”

I almost wanted to debate her being ‘my’ shaman, but I did kinda tell her that she had a place on my ship until she didn’t want it anymore. So I just sat on the ground while she started her—or rather, my—tale. After a few seconds, Twilight sat next to me and the guards shrugged and joined us.

My hand found its way unbidden to Twilight’s back to rub it. The other hand found its way very bidden to the controller and I bumped it up, making her flinch and then lean against me. The big dude noticed that, but no one said anything.

It wasn’t an overly long story, but Zecora made the telling take half an hour. I kinda wondered how many days it would take to write, and out of boredom, I settled on two weeks as a decent amount of time.

By the time Zecora finished, Twilight was very weakly grinding against the ground and it looked like she was gritting her teeth. The gorillas turned to stare at me, all smiles. When the main gorilla took the stage again, he said, “Truly, a hero has graced us. Thank you, Navarone. And many thanks to your host of warriors as well. Now we can live our lives without the fear that Pertz will come for us.”

Unfortunately, that was my cue to actually do something. So I stood (and bumped up the remote) and said, “It is always the duty of the warrior to protect others. I am happy to fight so that your village does not have to, Kerchak. And upon behalf of Equestria, I’m sorry that Pertz was even allowed to become so powerful. I hope that his transgressions will not color your opinions of Celestia too negatively.”

He snorted. “While we would all prefer him to have never appeared, it is good to see that the ponies can clean up their own messes. And while I would never give this prize to a pony, you are something different. Something…” He took a deep breath before smiling. “...special.” Oh boy. “On behalf of all of Africa, my village awards you the diadem of the conqueror, stolen from Pertz himself.”

He waved to his side, where a gorilla was approaching with a crown in one hand. Twilight loudly gasped and for a second, I thought she actually came. Then I took a closer look at the crown and realized that the stone on it matched her ass tattoo. Huh. Maybe that’s one of the elements of harmony or something.

When the random gorilla got close enough, Kerchak carefully picked up the golden crown and lifted it up before him. “Step closer, Navarone the human.” I really didn’t want that ugly thing on my head, but I figured it was for the best. Twilight started to say something, but I bumped the controller again and she chose to stay silent instead of risking a moan.

Soon enough, I stood before the giant. Each of his hands was probably about the size of my head and even standing near him made my skin crawl. The dude could probably tear me to pieces without even breaking a sweat. Thankfully, he chose to just gingerly place the fugly crown on my head. “Thank you, Kerchak,” I said.

One of his hands clasped my shoulder and I felt my knees almost buckle just from the weight and pressure, but I managed to hold it together. “Thank you, Navarone. You and your warriors are welcome in my village as long as you would like to stay. And if you require any aid fixing your boat, we will help as we can.”

“I will ask the captain if there is anything we need that you can provide. I will also possibly send over traders, if you are interested. And one of my crew members would be interested in asking some of your people questions, if that would be permitted.”

“We are happy to share our culture,” he said, finally removing his hand. “I will assign a guide to you, if one is needed.”

“I think we’ll be fine,” I said. “But my presence is needed back on the ship. I have skills that assist in keeping Pertz pacified and I need to be there in case he tries breaking free.”

“Of course. If you or your crew has any need of my help, I should not be hard to find. It was a pleasure to meet you, Navarone.”

“And it was nice to see such a kind village,” I said with a nod. He smiled and very carefully ran a finger down my face, then started walking back to the center of the village. I kinda wondered what that meant, but I honestly didn’t care. “Zecora, do you need anything from them?” I asked.

“Perhaps. I will need to check over my inventory. I believe Rarity would also be interested in perusing their fabrics.”

“And the quartermaster will want to check over their food. Naga, you can return to the boat. Guards, stay here for now and watch over the ones we send over.” They saluted. “Twilight, feel free to ask all the questions you want.”

She gulped and forced down the pleasure, though she was still blushing up a storm. “N-nav, that’s the… the element of magic.”

“I kinda figured. Can you teleport Zecora back to the ship? I’ll fly—” Her horn lit up and Zecora and I both appeared on the deck. “That also works.” I went ahead and lowered the intensity on the remote.

Before I could go find the captain, the captain found me. “It seemed to go pretty well, judging by your new crown,” he said.

“Yeah. If you have anything to trade, they said we’re welcome to. They also said they’d be happy to help fix the boat, if there’s anything they can do.”

“I doubt it, but I’ll head over myself to ask. I’ll also bring my quartermaster. And I’m sure some of Twilight’s friends would be interested.”

“Yeah, probably. How’s the repair coming?”

“Well. Should be about four hours or so. Properly waterproofing it is time consuming.”

“I bet.” I finally pulled the stupid crown off my head. “I’ll go find Twilight’s friends.”

“And I’ll find my quartermaster. “ He went off to do his thing while I did mine.

Since it was Twilight’s element, I dumped the crown in her room then went to Rarity’s. She wasn’t in there, so I poked around until I found her in Fluttershy’s room. “We’re next to a friendly village, if you guys want to go say hi,” I said, leaning against the door frame.

Rarity looked fairly excited about it. Fluttershy looked somewhat worried, since she’s a little pussy. “What are the residents?” Rarity asked.

“Gorillas.” Some of her excitement dripped away. “They’re friendly. Twilight’s already over there and I left a guard squad. I figured you’d be interested in seeing their fabrics.”

“Did they have pets?” Fluttershy quietly asked.

“I dunno, probably? I wasn’t paying attention. You two are welcome to go if you want. And feel free to spread the word around to anyone else that might be interested. Just, you know, don’t do anything stupid.”

“Perish the thought,” Rarity sarcastically replied. “I am interested, at least. I shall pop over and see some of the sights. Can anypony go with us, or are you still worried about the ship being assaulted?”

“Man, I can’t imagine there’s much that’ll fuck with guests of the gorillas. Feel free to ask anyone to go with you. As long as I have one squad on deck and one watching Pertz, I’m happy.”

“Excellent. Fluttershy, would you be interested in joining me? After spending so long cooped up in the ship, I’m sure you’re feeling some manner of cabin fever…”

“Getting out would be nice,” she said, a small hint of a smile gracing her face. “Are you going back, Nav?”

“Nah. I’m not down with the hero worship shit and it seemed like it was heading that way. If shit gets bad, I’ll head over there, but it should be fine. Oh, and before you leave, ask that chick we picked up to go with you. Silver Quill or whatever her name is. The soldiers she had with her said she’s depressed and getting out might be good.”

“Happily,” Rarity said with a nod. “But I think I’ll prepare her a quick hat before I ask her. It’s quite bright out there. It really can’t be good for the eyes.”

“We’ll probably be leaving in around four hours, so be done with the village around then.”

“We shan’t take long, don’t you worry.” Since she seemed to have things in hand, I went on back to my room and beheld Taya on the bed in one of my shirts.

When she saw me enter, her eyes went wider than your mom’s ass, but she didn’t make any other movements. I chose not to comment and set my sword and gun down, then joined her on the bed.

After a few seconds, she cleared her throat.

I didn’t say anything.

She quietly removed the shirt, flew it over to one of my drawers, then sat on the bed next to me.

After a minute of silence, I pulled out the remote and said, “I’ll forget about that if you do me a favor.”

“...Okay.”

“Show this remote around and ask if anyone can figure out what it goes to. Tell them not to do any magic to it aside from holding it and not to take it apart. They can only play with the dials.”

“...Alright.” She took the remote with magic and then spent a second fiddling with it. “Um. Do you know what it does?”

“Yes. Take your time, and bring it back when you’re done.”

“Okay, daddy.” She walked out, her tail wagging. For some reason, Flo was giggling richly in the back of my head.

Five hours later, we were finally getting ready to go. The hole was repaired and it had been fairly thoroughly tested, everyone was back on board, Twilight was blushing up a storm as Spike confusedly messed with a strange remote, and my report for Celestia was ready to go.

“Are we ready?” Gourd asked when he found me on deck.

“Not quite,” I said. “I want to let Celestia know what’s what before we get into the ocean, in case she can grab this asshole for us.”

“Well, we’re ready whenever. Just let me know and I’ll tell the elementals to cast us off.”

“Yep.” I walked over to Spike, who had the controller up to his ear. It looked like it was on max and he was trying to tell if it was making a sound. “Spike, stop fiddling with that thing. I need you to send something to Celestia.”

“Huh? Oh.” He pulled it away from his ear and said, “Taya just asked me to look at it. Do you think Celestia’s awake now?”

“Yeah.” I held up an envelope for him. “If you would…” He took it and sent it away in a blast of flame. “You figure that thing out yet?”

“Nah. It’s kinda interesting, though. I like puzzles.” He started fiddling with the settings again. Twilight started walking over, a very strange look on her face. “Do you have any ideas?”

“One or two,” I said.

But before I could lie, Twilight grabbed my arm. “A word, Nav?” she asked in a tone that brooked no argument.

“Sure,” I said. She picked me up with magic and started dragging me away. Spike shrugged and twisted the dial back up to max, making Twilight flinch.

When we got to her room, she pressed me up against the wall. “WHAT THE HAY IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, smiling. “The deal is that I got to control the remote. So I used that control to let other people play with it.” She really looked like she wanted to argue, but I was kinda right and she knew it. And of course, the way her back legs were shaking, I could tell she was feeling too good to stay angry. So I put one of my hands on her head and started rubbing her ears. “A deal’s a deal, silly,” I said as I leaned in for a kiss.

She moaned as her lips met mine. It looked like her tail was raising and I kinda wanted to do a little more, but the moment was ruined by Spike walking in.

His eyes immediately went to a place they shouldn’t. The way her tail was angled, he pretty much saw everything, from our kiss to her goods to the buzzing thing lodged in her goods. After a small blue screen of death moment, he slowly turned his head to the controller in one of his hands. Then he looked back to the buzzing thing. Then back to the controller.

When he looked back up, he got to see an extremely embarrassed Twilight and a smirking human. “So what did you need?” I happily asked. From the expression on his face, he knew exactly what had been happening, and didn’t really know what to make of it. He slowly turned the controller off. The buzzing we could all hear stopped and his ears dropped. He slowly put the controller on the floor. When it was out of his hands, he backed up, pulled the door shut, waited a few seconds, then knocked.

Twilight slowly pulled it open with magic, but refused to meet his gaze. Both of their faces were burning red and neither said anything. He just held up a return note from Celestia.

I walked around Twilight and grabbed it.

I need to speak to you alone. Return to your room.

“Thank you, Spike,” I said. “And we can have that discussion later, Twilight.” Neither of them said anything, so I scooped up the controller and walked on down to my room.

As soon as I closed the door, Celestia teleported in with an unusually loud pop, then shivered and lifted a hoof to her head. “It’s been some time since I teleported that far,” she said with another shiver.

“Can you get back with Pertz?” I asked.

“Yes. But I would also like to return with you. There’s been an emergency in the mage’s tower and I need you, your ring, and your key, if possible.”

“I’ll need to talk to Gourd and Watcher and see if they need me and if they have enough bits to cover repairs. But I should be able to go.”

She shook her head. “Your ship took damages in service of the crown, Navarone.” She magicked up an official-looking document and continued, “Give this to any shipwright at an official shipyard in Europe and they can bring it to a royal bank to be reimbursed for all repairs and materials.”

I took the document and quickly looked it over. It said pretty much the same thing she did, with a lot more fancy wording. “Neat. I’ll still need to talk to some people. I’ll show you to Pertz and then go find them.”

“Very well, though I would like to see some others before we depart.”

“Yeah. Twilight has some stuff for you. Shit got weird on this trip, man. Like, super strange. Shit was bananas.”

“Hm. You can tell me more when we have a moment’s peace. For now, take me to Pertz. I have words for him.”

“Right this way.” I led her out of my room and then down into the cargo hold. Thankfully, no one was out and about, so I didn’t need to explain why the hell the princess was there.

The one guard that looked up when we entered punched the other two, so they all dropped their cards to see who it was, then immediately gaped and started bowing.

Celestia paid them about as much attention as one would normally give a trash collector, and focused all of her attention on the dude in the chains. “It seems you… understated your treatment of him,” Celestia quietly said.

“That piece of shit didn’t want to leave,” I said with a shrug. “It was worse, but the elementals patched him up.”

“Do you still have his horn?”

“Zecora has it at the moment,” I said. “She wanted to study it and I told her she could, as long as she didn’t damage it.”

“We will take it with us, though he likely will not have it restored. Is it possible to speak with him?”

“Yeah, but I’d prefer if you waited until we’re back in Equestria. This dude had what appeared to be true magic. He can fuck up your palace all he wants, but I want my ship to survive.”

“Very well. I will converse with the elementals for a moment, then find Twilight.”

“Alright. I’m gonna go find Gourd and Watcher.” She started talking to the waters, so I figured I was done there. My first stop was Watcher’s room, since I figured he would be in there. Sure enough, he was, though he wasn’t alone. The door was open, so I didn’t feel too bad walking in on him and Zecora. They also weren’t doing anything lewd, thankfully.

“What do you need?” he asked as soon as he saw me, cutting Zecora off mid-sentence.

“Celestia teleported in and needs me back in Canterlot,” I said. “She also gave me a voucher to get the ship repaired for free. Do you need me for anything at the moment, or am I free to go back?”

“I believe we can handle Europe, sir. It’s best to keep Celestia placated. But if she just wants you there as a booty call, I am going to be very disappointed.”

“Agreed. And Zecora, she wants Pertz’s horn back.”

“I shall leave it next to him post-haste,” she said, sliding off the bed.

My next stop was the deck, where I figured Gourd probably was. Sure enough, he was talking to two of his crew members when I got up there, but stopped when I got close. “Are we ready to go?” he asked.

“Yeah. But Celestia needs me in Equestria. She also sent me this.” I passed him the free repair document. As he started scanning it, I said, “Money for repairs shouldn’t be an issue. If they try to refuse this thing, either find a different shipwright or send word through Spike.”

“You got it, Nav. I’ll send word when we start heading back to Canterlot to pick you up.”

“Works for me. I hate that fucking city. You need anything else?”

“Nah. This should be plenty. I think we can handle getting a ship repaired.”

“Good. Then I need to talk to Taya and then get ready.” He nodded and I walked over to the front of the ship, where Taya was staring at the ocean. Her horn was lit up and when I got next to her, I could see that she was lifting water up and tying it in knots. She heard my footsteps approaching and turned around with a smile across her face. “Bad news.” That smile dipped slightly. “Celestia needs me back in Canterlot.” That slight dip became a large dip. “I’ll probably be leaving as soon as I get my stuff ready.”

“...Can I go?” she asked.

“She’s either in the cargo hold or with Twilight right now. Go ask her.”

“She’s… here?”

“Yeah. Teleported in to get me and Pertz personally. I need to go start packing. Let me know what she says.”

“Of course, daddy.” She started purposefully trotting off.

My next stop was Pinkie’s room. Thankfully, she was in there, drawing in a coloring book. She looked up with her typical smile when I walked in. “Can you do something for me?” I asked.

“What do you need, ol’ buddy ol’ pal?” she asked, hopping up.

I held up the remote. “This goes to a vibrator in Twilight. I need to go to Canterlot and I won’t have time to play with it. Can you tease her for the rest of today and give the remote to her tonight for me?”

The typical smile on her face grew and she snatched the remote away. “I’d LOVE to!” She jerked the dial up and sighed in joy. “This is gonna be the best!”

“Enjoy. I’ll see you later, Pinks.” Before I could escape, she hugged me.

“See you later, Navi!” And just like that, she let go and went back to coloring, though she had the remote sitting next to her.

I finally went to my room and started packing. I had no idea what I would need and my armor wasn’t repaired yet, so I packed the carbon nanotube armor and several sets of clothes. I also grabbed the key and panicked about the ring for a moment before remembering that it was still embedded in Pertz.

By the time I got ready, a glum Taya joined me. “She said no…”

“I’m sure she has her reasons,” I said with a hug. “It shouldn’t take the ship too long to get repaired, and hopefully this business won’t take too long and she can teleport me back.”

Taya sighed and returned the hug. “I’ll miss you, daddy. Just promise me that you’ll stay safe.”

“Always.” After another several long seconds of hugging, I let go and pulled away. “Where is she now?”

“With Twilight…”

“Then that’s where I’m going. I’ll see you soon, Taya.”

She didn’t reply, sadly.

I found Celestia right as she was leaving Twilight’s room. I could see the hint of a blush on her face and she was carrying several pages of notes with her. I decided not to comment and instead asked, “Ready?”

“Yes. Let us go and collect Pertz.” We went back down to the hold. The guards immediately came to attention this time. Celestia noticed them just as much as before. “Elementals, can you please put him to sleep and remove the ring?”

None of them said anything, but his eyes closed and then they all oozed out. When each one was free, they slid up to his ear and did… something to it to make the ring slide right out, and healed the ear behind it.

“If you would, Nav?”

I reached over and caressed the elementals gently, making them turn pink. They held up the ring for me and I took it. “Thank you, girls. I’ll see you in a little while.” They all slid off Pertz and then through the wood on the bottom of the ship.

“Are you ready?” Celestia asked.

“Yep. Let’s go.”

Her horn lit up and the world seemed to shift and then I fell to my knees. She gently put a wing on my back. “That much magic buildup at once for someone who has not experienced magic in some time feels quite unpleasant,” she said.

At least I recovered quickly. I achingly pulled myself back up and shivered for a few seconds. “Fuck, that was bad.”

“My apologies. But Shining Armor can only hold his shield for so long. We needed to return sooner rather than later.”

“Shit, Shiny’s here? What kind of emergency did you say this was, again?”

She grimaced slightly. “Tell me, what do you know of demons?”