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Face Ghosts

by Majin Syeekoh

Chapter 1: Give Me Your Face


Rarity sat in her living room, reading a rather pleasant book about the life cycle of fireflies. Fluttershy had lent it to her as a recommendation, and the recommendation was well-placed. Who knew fireflies could be so interesting?

SUDDENLY

Vinyl Scratch burst in through the door, catching Rarity off guard. Before she could ask why Vinyl had entered her domicile, Vinyl bounded towards Rarity and started rubbing her face, preventing her from reading.

Rarity sighed.

"Dear, why are you rubbing my face? I mean, I do appreciate it, but I was in the middle of some light reading."

Vinyl's expression was indiscernible under her shades as she pushed Rarity's muscles this way and that.

"Shhh." Vinyl kept up her facial palpations. "I'm massaging the ghosts out of your face."

Rarity blinked. "Excuse me, Miss Scratch. I think I'd know if there were ghosts in my face."

Vinyl continued massaging Rarity's face. "No you wouldn't. That's why they're ghosts."

"Well." Rarity sighed and squirmed a bit, ostensibly to escape the kneading, but this mare really knew how to give a face massage. "Could you come back in like, an hour? I was engaged in a book and I was just getting to the best part."

"No time," Vinyl rasped as her ministrations grew more vigorous. "If I don't massage the ghosts out of your face, it'll explode."

Rarity chuckled. "As if I'd believe such a thing."

"Okay, toots." The rubbing was transforming into something rather… pleasurable. On her face. "After everything you've been through, you don't have the option to consider I'm wrong."

Rarity opened her mouth in protest, but thought back on her adventures and realized that the mare who was rubbing her cheeks wasn't exactly… wrong. Not quite right, but not exactly wrong.

"You may continue massaging my face."

"To get rid of the ghosts."

"Yes, whatever."

The massaging continued for a bit longer, Rarity having no choice but to lay back and enjoy the massage. Her breathing relaxed as she absorbed the strangely intricate motions Vinyl's hooves were making on her facemeats.

"Do you have a jar?" Vinyl asked.

Rarity grasped a jar in her magic and levitated it over to Vinyl, who grasped it in her own. "Yes but whatever do you—"

Vinyl ceased the massage and held the jar to Rarity's eye, whereupon she felt an immense pressure blast through her eye, like a hose turned onto the most ludicrous setting it had and then a bit more. Rarity wanted to scream, but all she could do was open her mouth as the sensation was too much for her to even vocalize the discomfort.

Vinyl pulled away the jar, releasing Rarity from the awkward agony and allowing her to take a few shallow breaths. She looked up to see Vinyl looking at the jar, a blue mass swirling around it and her good capping it.

Rarity exhaled. "Is. Is that."

"Yes." Vinyl nodded. "These are the ghosts that were in your face."

"Oh my goodness," Rarity said as she put a hoof to her forehead. "I had no idea."

Vinyl shook the bottle, causing the face ghosts to flow angrily. "Most ponies don't." She sniffed it, then recoiled. "They end up living with a sense of inescapable listlessness and start engaging in activities unrelated to work and responsibilities."

Rarity eyed the firefly book, then looked back at Vinyl. "But isn't that… everypony?"

Vinyl nodded, chugged the contents of the bottle, then gave to bottle back to Rarity, who bore a look of bewilderment. "Exactly. I've taken it upon myself to massage the ghosts out of all of the faces in Equestria."

"That's, that's…" Rarity said as she placed the bottle down next to her on the couch, "that's such thing."

"Indeed!" Vinyl wagged a hoof at Rarity. "I have a lot of work ahead of me." She looked at the window. "Face Massage Mare, away!"

"No no no no no—" Rarity quickly protested before Vinyl broke through one of Rarity's windows, the shattered glass sprinkling itself all over the floor, from large shards to fine granules. She sighed.

Celestia, this will take hours to clean up. Not to mention walking across town to get a quote on replacing the pane and...

She looked at the book, then at her sewing machine.

I'll get the window fixed later. A nice breeze is what I need to soothe me as I finish White Lightning's dress.


Deep in the Everfree Forest, no pony dares enter. The fauna are infected with strange magicks and devour all those who enter. The Vines and trees also possess a weird energy, having an untoward life of their own and all too willing to draw strays fillies into the ecosystem as fertilizer for their foul roots. The air itself has a preternatural stench to it, suffocating those without the wits to resist its command to lay still and let themselves be eaten.

They say those who settle in the Everfree Forest do not escape intact.

There was one such curious being who chose residence in the unholy canopy. But this creature was not one of normal stature.

Two ponies high at the withers, the Changeling Queen Chrysalis stole away in the dark arboreal halls. On one hoof to seek revenge, on the other to play the victim.

But at this moment, she had only one desire.

"Get off my face."

"No," Vinyl said.

"I said get off."

"Don't listen to the ghosts."

"There are no ghosts in my face, but there will be one if you don't get off."

Vinyl vigorously rubbed Chrysalis's face while sitting on her head. "Those are the ghosts talking."

"Like I said, the only ghosts there will be are—"

"The failures of your past brought upon by situations completely outside of your control and therefore shouldn't blame yourself for."

Chrysalis grunted. "I'm trying my hardest to not kill you right now."

"I can see that, and it's appreciated." Vinyl then jumped up, then fell, grasping Chrysalis's neck and slamming her head into the ground. "I can tell I'm not going to make any progress here, so it's time to drop the face and move on."

Vinyl trotted off as Chrysalis extricated her face from the sodden Earth.

"She did not just say that," she said as she spat out some dirt.

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