After a quick breakfast of pancakes and dried apples - again more food than Doug thought he would be comfortable eating, but he manages to pack it away - Applejack and Doug head to the barn where he was sorting yesterday. Applejack, still a little giddy from their chase, loads one of the medium sized carts with crates. “Apples for the market,” she explains as Granny Smith comes by, dropping off a collection of baked goods. At Applejack’s mention Doug grabs the hammer and nails; the two depart, though not along the main road towards Ponyville.

“So,” Applejack says as they near one of the barns a little further east of the farmhouse, “we got some shovels in here. But the shafts might be a little small.”

“Didn’t notice that problem yesterday,” Doug quips as Applejack opens the door.

Applejack rolls her eyes as she walks in. A small forge, barrels of water, and two anvils take up the middle of the room, leaving barely enough space to maneuver around. Sledgehammers, axes, and long saws on the end of poles line the walls, along with scattered collections of hardware. Next to some smaller gardening tools are shovels and spades, and Applejack picks one out, biting the middle of the shaft and bringing it to Doug.

“This is a one step shaft,” she explains after she passes the spade to Doug. He sets the flat head against the floor. It’s a bit more than three feet long, plus the foot or so of metal head. Same blunted part on both sides to set a hoof or foot against. “Balanced for mouth with a suppression grip, but we can use our hooves with it, too.” Applejack glances down at Doug’s feet, muzzle trying to decide between a smirk and a concerned frown. “Did, um, Rarity talk to you about your… boots?” She decides on a smirk, eyes twinkling as she looks up at him.

“That misunderstanding got cleared up,” Doug replies with a roll of his own eyes. “We decided on a sturdier pair of what she termed jackboots. I’m hoping they fit the bill, but we’ll see.”

“She named ‘em after me?” Applejack touches a hoof to her chest, smiling. “Ah’m honored.”

“I don’t think she meant it as a complement,” Doug says dryly.

Applejack snorts, nodding her head like she knew all along. “Heh, she don’t mean nothin’ bad. Just a bit of friendly rivalry is all.” She inspects the spade, purses her muzzle, then grabs a shovel and a pack with a single long loop. “You’ll probably want these as well.”

“So, you’ve been on one of these expeditions before?” Doug asks. He loads the pack with hammer and nails, loops the strap across his chest, picks the spade and shovel up, rests them on his shoulder, and follows Applejack to the door.

“Ah haven’t, but Big Mac has.” Applejack hitches herself back to the cart. “Said he didn’t much care for the work.” Her voice drops to a conspiratorial whisper as she glances back towards the farmhouse. “Ah think he fancied Rarity at the time.”

“Couldn’t find the words?” Doug asks jovially.

Applejack smiles, shaking her head. “Ah think Rarity didn’t want to leave her Boutique. That, and Big Mac’s always had lots of ideas about what we can do ‘round the farm. Ain’t too different from me, in that regard. But Granny’s set on keepin’ things traditional ‘round here, and havin’ a unicorn around would be a mighty big change.”

“Guess I’m a pretty big change, too,” Doug says quietly, sighing.

“Nah; long as you don’t try too many fancy new things, and work like an earth pony.” Applejack softly smiles at Doug before lightly bumping her flank against his. He smiles back down at her, hand rubbing her withers. “Hey. Ah gotta take these to Ponyville for the mornin’ market.” She glances up at the bright moon, nearly to the horizon. “You go finish checkin’ the fenceline, where ya didn’t get yesterday. If Ah know her, Rares should be up’n’about by then, wantin’ to go by first light.”

“See you later,” Doug says, leaning down to kiss Applejack on the top of her head. Her head flicks up, kissing him on the chin, before she makes her way to Ponyville, more than a bit of a spring in her step. Doug heads north, glad for the pack, but wishing he brought along water or a few bottles of apple juice. He barely catches a blaze of color streaking back and forth across the night sky.

“Eight,” Rainbow Dash mutters to herself as she executes a perfect wingover, zipping back along the edge of Sweet Apple Acres. Her wings pound against the air, the long stretch over the farm the worst part of her pre-dawn workout. But she’s got to get endurance done at some point, so might as well knock it out first. She spots Applejack pulling her cart to Ponyville, licking her lips at the thought of getting a little reward for breakfast. Just two more. She gets to the south edge of the farm, another wingover, and heads back north.

“Nine,” Rainbow Dash mutters as she hits the north end of the farm. She spots Doug at the border, the surprise turning her wingover into a bunt that lets her watch the creature from inverted. Huh. What’re you doing there? Did you not get all your chores done and Applejack kicked you out of bed? Sheesh, buddy, whatever she’s paying you ain’t worth it. She frowns as she notices her lines are off, righting herself and finishing the lap with a relieved, “Ten.” She spirals down, grinning as she notices Doug watching her and putting a little extra flare into her landing.

“Hey, Rainbow Dash.” Doug greets her cheerfully as he slows from a jog along the fenceline. I can’t believe she can fly so fast. Reminds me a lot of Applejack working in the fields, really enjoying herself despite the hard effort required.“Early workout?”

“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash says, breathing a little hard. “Makes it easier to take naps later.” Her nostrils twitch, her muzzle puckering up. “Hey…” She takes to the air, flying a little closer and sniffs, eyebrows furrowing. She demands angrily, “What happened?!”

“Whoa, there,” Doug says quickly, dropping the hammer and holding up his hands. “I can explain.”

“Yeah?” Rainbow Dash sniffs again, as if there was any chance of mistaking the pungent scent. Her hackles raise, wings twitching furiously as they beat against the air. “Because Applejack ain’t the kind of gal who’d buck just anypony!” She advances, raising her hooves as if to clobber him.

“You’re right,” Doug concedes, backing up. “She’s my lead mare.”

Rainbow Dash stops, warily watching Doug. “Really.” Doug nods. “And there wasn’t any funny business?”

“Not to my knowledge,” Doug says, “and I would have no intention of using any abilities like that if I did possess them.”

This merely raises Rainbow Dash’s suspicions. “Yeah? Well, why the hedging? Why not just say you didn’t?”

“Um,” Doug stalls, glancing around, “because I might not be aware of some interaction with you? Like, my smell could make you, I don’t know, fall irresistibly in love with me?”

Rainbow Dash draws within a hoof’s length of Doug, sniffing at his face. “Nope,” she says pointedly.

Doug chuckles, a hand rubbing his face. “Rainbow, if that was the case, then how would you have alerted the rest of the ponies about the danger I pose?”

“It, um, I…” Rainbow Dash trails off, her anger turning to a pout as she backs up. “Fine. So, you and Applejack, huh?”

“Yup,” Doug returns with a somewhat cheerful nod as he picks up his tools.

“You know, I thought I was fast,” Rainbow Dash says, following him along. She looks around as if she lost something. “But… is this normal for you? Your… kind?”

“Not at all. A year would be considered fast. But she really wanted me around, and I guess I wanted to stay.” Doug shrugs, glancing at Rainbow Dash as she peers into his pack. “Looking for something?”

“So, it was brought to my attention,” Rainbow Dash says, “that I didn’t, um, exactly finish that Friendship report.” Doug merely nods. “And, since I accidentally left the papers here, I couldn’t exactly write down the answers you gave me.”

“Make them up, you mean,” Doug says, smirking.

“What? No!” Rainbow Dash shakes her head wildly, then sighs. “Okay, fine. I would have at least tried to remember what I heard about you.”

“I guess that’s a start,” Doug says, continuing along the fence line. “I left the papers back at the house. Do you remember the questions?”

“Of course I do,” Rainbow Dash says, scoffing. “Um, one of them was where you’re from.” She frowns. “You’re not from the Everfree Forest, are you?”

“I am not,” Doug says curtly.

An awkward silence passes for several seconds.

“Sooo,” drawls Rainbow Dash, flying upside down and staring at him with magenta eyes, “where’ya from?”

“You wouldn’t know,” Doug says flatly, continuing his scan along the fence. “It’s not from around here.”

“Try me,” Rainbow Dash says, bravado covering her lack of any actual knowledge of geography, Equestrian or otherwise.

Doug rolls his eyes. “I come from Virginia. Heard of there?”

Rainbow Dash raises an eyebrow before her muzzle scrunches up in amusement. “Is that a funny way of saying ‘vagina’? Because I think everypony comes from one of those.” She leans forward, inspecting her belly with both hooves.

Doug covers his face with a hand, sighing exasperatedly. “It’s a state.”

“I mean," Rainbow Dash continues, ignoring Doug, "there’s no way that word comes from ‘virgin’. Unless you think your dam was a virgin, in which case I have bad news for you.” Rainbow rolls over, grinning maniacally. She looks down at Doug, eager to break the fact that foals come from mare’s tummies. “Your dam wasn’t a virgin. In fact, she probably had sex, like, every day.” Rainbow Dash snickers to herself at the ludicrousness. What kind of herd would want a mare who monopolized their stallion’s time like that?

Doug just walks along, pointedly ignoring her.

Rainbow Dash grumbles to herself. After a few moments she breaks the silence, “Sooo, what exactly are you.”

“Human,” Doug curtly replies.

Rainbow Dash snorts loudly. “You’re foaling me, right? You’re a hymen from vagina?”

“...What?”

Rainbow Dash’s raucous laughter echoes among the trees, “Did you, just, like, pick words you learned yesterday? Next, next you’ll tell me you came from Buckingtown!”

“Not quite,” Doug corrects. “Buckingham.”

Rainbow Dash’s head slowly corkscrews to the side while she tries to figure out if he’s messing with her or being serious.

Doug chortles to himself. “I’m probably not helping any, huh?”

Rainbow Dash shakes her head from side to side. “Are all hymens as sex obsessed as you?”

“Well, we only get one shot at it, so…” Doug grins as Rainbow giggles involuntarily.

She immediately clams up, glaring at Doug. How dare he get me to laugh at that!

“I’d guess no, but I don’t have a whole lot of experience to draw on.” Doug shrugs. “Plus, you’re the one making all the gutter connections.” Doug smirks as Rainbow frowns. “Are all mares as sex crazed as you?”

“Hey! I’m not sex crazed!” Rainbow Dash exclaims. At Doug’s disbelieving head shake she drops down, flying right in his face. “You’re way more sex crazed than me!”

“Really,” Doug says flatly. He crosses his arms across his chest, then lifts one hand to stroke his chin.

Rainbow Dash nods resolutely. “And I know how to prove it! I’ll bet you, and if you win, I’ll give you a muzzlejob!”

Doug’s motions stop. Then he looks up, raising an eyebrow. This is far too enticing. “And if you win?”

“When I win, all you have to do is concede that you’re wrong, and I’m right!” Rainbow sticks a hoof forward, eyes glinting.

Next Chapter: Ch. 26 - Brain Rattler* Estimated time remaining: 12 Hours, 56 Minutes