Rarity's Colt

by Mocha Star

First published 12th of September, 2019

Rarity, among others across the land, signed up to be foster parents for foals after numerous disasters struck the nation. Few expected to be called upon, among the least was Rarity.

A troubled foal with poor boundaries, bad language, and what seems to be a very troubled past is sent to reside with Rarity, a mare unprepared for true motherhood as well as being unknowing of how to raise a foal of a different gender. A long road ahead awaits them both.

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Rated Teen for adult language and strong sexual references and situations. No sex occurs in this story.

As appropriate, this is a societal gender reversal role story; so expect some differences than what you may be expecting as far as gender authority is balanced.

This story is inspired by many other stories, most of which are incomplete and stopped years ago; never to be updated again(?).

Story takes place shortly before Magical Mystery Cure.

Arrival

I can’t believe I’ve fallen so far behind on my tasks, I was on time with the hem on the dress for Packet and after that, which should be now, I’d be starting the inseam on the birthday dress for that awful mare I met in Manehattan that said she was famous and showed me a fake photo of herself with Princess Celestia.

I had to take the order, against my better judgement, on the spot instead of via correspondence or over a long winded conversation full of gossip and rumor mongering. Dazzling Pearl, indeed.

Rarity caught herself frowning at the clock and nervously swatted at her mane in a practiced way that made her seem to be more superficial than she actually was. The room was a smaller square that was at the top of the second flight of stairs with a door at the end, one that she knew led to a hallway that spanned the diameter of the building. Two rooms were offset by four doors, two on each side, with a final door one would see with the mayor’s cutie mark on it.

The door was two paces from the secretary’s desk, which was three paces from the very well used and aged, but thankfully covered with a clean cloth, cushion she sat upon. The secretary sat at his desk outside the hall to the mayor’s office writing on a notepad with a pencil held in his lips with dexterity Rarity, on occasion, envied.

Her eyes watched the motions of the graphite wrapped in wood, trying to discern what was being written with such intensity with no other documents of importance around him. The pencil stopped and her eyes met his for an instant before she took a great deal of interest at a knot of wood under the surface of the desk, under where he could see.

“Have you ever noticed there’s a mark on the desk that looks like the flame of a candle in a soft breeze?”

The stallion stood up, walked to the side of the desk and looked at the mark, shrugged, and went back to sitting on the floor, curling his tail out of her sight. “No, Miss Rarity. I didn’t see what you saw, heh. See-saw.” He started scratching at the paper again, leaving a sentence hanging in her mind.

Before it took over all her mental faculties she cleared her throat. “Yes, well, excuse me. But, have you any idea when the mayor will be available to see me, since she called upon me with such urgency, I would think she’d be ready at the onset of my arrival.”

He looked up and the pencil stopped. He shrugged, then started writing again.

What is wrong with this stallion? I certainly hope that if he is a special hire that he has somepony to assist him assisting me. Perhaps she’s simply in the restroom, for ten minutes, at ten in the morning. Hm, maybe there’s something with the number ten today. A coincidence of some sort, it isn’t the tenth. It’s not the tenth month, thank Celesia. Maybe it’s just a busy day today?

In Ponyville, early in the day, in the middle of the Month of Songs, Rarity exhaled quietly, since a Lady doesn’t sigh loudly in public. Come on, come on, come on… come on!

The door clicked and opened inward, the mayor was smiling with her professional demeanor and brightened when she saw Rarity. “Ah, just the mare I was hoping to see. Rarity how have you been?”

They met just past the stallion and Rarity took the chance to glance at the paper and what was written on it when she gave a greeting nuzzle to the mayor. Well, color me impressed. He’s a writer and his penmareship is quite good, for a stallion.

“Oh, it was nothing to wait for a meeting with you. I’d drop everything just to see you for some one on one time, it’s been so very long, and I often wonder what Miss Ivory Scroll has been up to when not fetlock deep in paperwork and running a growing town.”

“It’s been busy, that’s for certain. Thankfully, we don’t have any recent monster attacks to report to the capitol, but our harvest projections are a bit low,” Ivory sighed loudly and Rarity’s smile grew slightly. “It’s a lot to talk about, but that’s not why you’re here. Come with me into my office, this is an official request, after all.”

Rarity followed Ivory Scroll, taking the personal energy and focus to close the doors behind her so she could let the writer write. “I’ll be honest, Mayor, I was and am a bit surprised to receive your summons on such short notice. This isn’t about my business, is it? If it is, I’d like to work with you to clarify anything that may seem amiss.”

“It’s nothing of the sort, Rarity,” Ivory led Rarity down the hall and towards the open door to her office where she saw the large mayorial desk that was as long as a buffet table with sets of boxes labeled in and out at both sides. An actual chair that hadn’t seen a year of use yet was where the mayor was to take her seat while two small benches indicated where she’d have to sit, if she chose to sit at all.

However, a Lady doesn’t stand during important personal meetings, so as she closed the door behind herself she was choosing her seat based on several factors she felt mattered she was surprised when the door was tugged back open. She looked back at what had disrupted her magical grip.

A candy apple red colt, just old enough to be out of his initial training in his talent, stumbled into the room with a disarray of papers under his wing. “Hi, sorry about that. I’m Seven, I come from a large family and I work for EMF, it’s nice to meet you, Miss Rarity.”

Alarm bells rang in her mind as she habitually met the colt’s hoof about what the issue could be. She wasn’t neglectful of Sweetie Belle, she wouldn’t comment on any other foals without a neutral Ministry representative present, she wouldn’t comment on her parents’ lack of attention to their parental responsibilities. In the second it took her to worry she had begun the rote greetings and came back to reality when she was offered to take a seat after the colt rudely took the seat she was considering slightly more than the one she was left with.

“Good, now that everypony is here, we can begin. As Seven mentioned, he represents the Equestria Ministry of Families, Foals, and Mental Health, and he’s here to discuss with you the fostering program you signed up for last year after there were a series of arsons attacking orphanages and specific sock factories.”

“They are still reported as being unrelated, as far as inspectors can tell, but it is a little suspicious.”

Ivory narrowed her eyes slightly at the colt that was the same as a mother telling their child to stop being disrespectful and to let the adults talk. “Yes, rumors and allegations of outland foal labor aside, we have something concrete to discuss.” Her demeanor relaxed and she gestured to Seven.

“Y-yes, well, as Miss Mayor Ivory Scroll said, you’re here because we have a foal for you to foster.” Rarity resisted the desire to wave her forelegs at the colt and deny everything, but she recalled signing the documents with the intent of following through, but that was then.

“Yes, I recall quite well. Orphans were at risk, now they are not, unless there’s another rash of dangers across the nation I should be concerned about.”

“No, nothing of the sort, Miss Rarity.”

“Please, just call me Rarity,” she interjected and Seven nodded, taking papers from under his wing and lying them on the desk in a haphazard pile he grimaced at. “And what might these be?”

“Yeah, uhm, you signed the documents, but like many ponies that acted in a time of crisis, I don’t think you thought about the far reaching nature of these documents.” He said as she quickly sorted the papers into piles that were thankfully much more orderly.

“And what are you saying, Seven?” she asked with implied criticism at the colt.

“The documents are standing for five years under any and all reasons that protect a foal, child, or offspring of any sapient creature that resides within the lands of Equestria at the time of signing; unless you are found guilty of a crime against the nation at large, fall into poverty and are unable to take care of the foster, or your life permanently ends in all forms recognizable by the Equestria Ministry of Families, Foals, and Mental Health, after its council decrees as such in your individual case.”

Rarity and Ivory looked at him with impressment. “That was certainly quite the mouthful,” Rarity complimented him.

“I practice a lot,” he answered and took his seat. “So, you’re going to foster a colt with special circumstances that we will help you work with until you decide or are deemed unable to supervise his mental and physical growth and wellbeing.”

“Wait, I apologize, but did you say I am to foster a colt? As in,” she hesitated to gesture at the male’s frame.

“Yes, I won’t patronize you so please understand that not only females fall into the dangers or risks of the hardships of life. I have a little more information on the colt, but here’s the paperwork I have gone over with Miss Mayor Ivory Scroll and we can go over it together if you’d like.

Rarity looked at the folder in her magic, reluctantly accepting her responsibility. She looked it over and over the next hour went over the document, what was known about the colt, and assistance that could be offered within five minutes at the crack of a special gem used by Rarity.

At the end, she was holding the folder to her chest with her forelegs while the colt stood awkwardly by the closed door and Ivory Scroll held a quietly crying Rarity in a gentle hug.

Introductions

Rarity took several minutes to regain her composure and clean the mascara that had run from her tears, but like she always did, she recovered and stood tall. A mare, ready to face what was ahead was she, and she was determined to do her duty to the colt she was to take in. “Excuse me, but I have to powder my muzzle. Where shall we meet so I may introduce myself to the young gentlecolt I’ll be caring for?”

Seven opened the door with his wing. “I’ll bring him to your home in one hour, if there’s anything you need to take care of before we arrive, I suggest you do it fast. The greeting process can take up to an hour; I have to be present while you show him his new home, lay your house rules before him, and officially accept him.

“It’s all formality, but it helps the foals we work with feel accepted into the environment. He may seem like he’ll be trouble,” Seven said as he followed Ivory and Rarity, “but all foals want to be loved, and once he lets his walls down you’ll see a new colt before your eyes.”

“Hmph, I suppose we will both have to learn from one another in this case. I’m not a true mother, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be; in the same right, he is a foal that refuses to be. There’s only so much we differ, it seems,” Rarity said sagely.

Several seconds passed in contemplative silence before it was broken at the base of the stairs. “It seems you are the mare for the job, and as I won’t be needed for this part, I wish you both a fantastic day,” Ivory waved the two off as she turned the corner to perform other mayoral duties.

Rarity split from Seven and made her way back to her home as quickly as she could. Saying short greetings to local ponies she knew, some were offput that she wouldn’t stop her haste to have a casual or short conversation; but she didn’t care. She had to prepare and only had an hour to do it.

She reached the door sooner than she thought she ever had and was inside as quickly as she could be, making her way up the stairs to the guest bedroom and making sure it was decent. She took several minutes to use the bathroom to its fullest, leaving refreshed, smelling of various flowers, and having reapplied her makeup as a professional would.

She took some time to prepare a pot of hot water, set out tea and hot chocolate incase he wanted either, and finally made sandwiches with small bite size vegetables on a serving tray in the way her sister liked. She had a two minute panic attack at the thought of her sister having to stay over while a confused colt was living with her now.

That led to the thoughts of what children tend to do with one another at their age, which led to thoughts of pregnancy, horrible cutie marks, a young life spiraling into darkness and sadness… She slapped herself across the muzzle with a dish towel, which helped her mind reset. While she was showering again, cursing the dirty and wet dish towel she’d grabbed in her moment of parental panic, she took time to ruminate on her own life and how her sister is not only well educated in manners of equine reproduction, but has two friends and a sister that she’s rarely without; all willing to help her stay pure until she’s ready in both body and mind for such activities.

With ten minutes left, Rarity gawped at the clock and tried to deny the repeating chance of that number today. She checked the cleanliness of the kitchen, the orderly state of her shop and main areas, she ushered a prospective client out on the basis of a family emergency and a discount if he returned the following morning.

She turned the open sign to closed, and began to pace for the last three minutes. Her carpet was, like nearly all quality carpets, enchanted to hush or eliminate the sounds hooves make. It was deathly quiet around her, save for the clock that was ticking every second like a hammer and chisel, writing her fate in stone. She spent her time inner monologuing as the clock set the pace for her thoughts.

Tick. Tick.
Here resides Rarity.

Tick. Tick.
She says she’s ready for anything.

Tick. Tick.
Can she handle what is in store for her with this poor colt? Is she ready, though?

Tick. Tick.
IS SHE?!

Heavy knocks against the door startled her, her legs lost their rhythm, and she fell to the floor in a heap. She stood as the knocking came again and made it one pace, then stumbled with a squeak. “Darn it,” she cursed to herself and her sore ankle. She quickly hobbled to the door, stopping a respectable distance away, then opened it with her magic.

Seven was standing with the shadow of a colt being cast from beside the door. “Hello, Miss Rarity. Snickers and I are here,” he gestured for the colt to show himself, “and we’re pleased to meet you, aren’t we?”

A young voice scoffed. “Whatever, it’s a place with a roof. Step up from last month,” the youth said as she walked around the corner, trying to prance like he was the new big stallion in town hall.

“Hm, yes,” Seven followed Snickers in and thanked Rarity silently, “last month you didn’t have a roof, so even a tent would be an improvement over that, right, Champ?”

Snickers glowered as his mane was tussled. Rarity frowned at Seven. “If you wouldn’t mind, Seven, would you not muss his mane into such a ragged style?” She moved to her new ward and balanced her weight carefully onto her aching leg, extending her good forehoof to him. “It’s an honor to meet you, young sir.”

Snickers looked at her hoof and bumped it. “So, are we gonna do it or what?” Rarity fell back onto her flank, Seven inhaled sharply, and Snickers stopped breathing while blushing brightly. “I-I didn’t mean it like that! Honest, that wasn’t what I meant! I would never, well… maybe, but not before a couple drinks at least, right?” He stumbled over his words, ending awkwardly with a pained smile.

Rarity went from shock, disgust, a small bit of intrigue that was quashed by everything right in society, and finally ended by giving him a flat stare. “Indeed. Anyway, I have water and snacks prepared in the kitchen, if you wouldn’t mind,” she gestured for Seven to take the lead and pointed them in the direction.

With what was just said, having a colt behind her that has full view of what most mares keep covered felt like a bad idea. It also meant she’d need a change in fashion as exposing oneself was considered edgy and showing one as being a risk taker, now she couldn’t deny and defy others. She had to set an example for a colt that lived with her now, but what else would she have to change to accommodate him?

“Wow, clean place ya got here,” the colt said pulling her out of her thoughts. Rarity walked past the two and encouraged them to sit while she poured hot water into three cups. She placed leaves in hers for tea and both colts asked for hot chocolate.

“So, Snickers, I would like to know something about you, if you don’t mind.”

“Actually, I do.”

There was a moment of silence as Snickers sipped his drink and the others looked at him in growing awkwardness. Seven began the conversation again. “Ah, well, Snickers here is most recently from-”

Snickers glanced aside at Seven. “Shut up and drink your stuff.”

“Excuse me, young colt! You manners--”

“Rock and roll, all night long?” he snarked.

Rarity’s horn lit and his hot chocolate was pulled from between his hooves with an indignant grunt as he reached for it. “There’ll be no sweets if you don’t the same.”

“Is that why you act like you ate a bag of dicks?” He snapped back, his ears folding down after he said it.

She froze, her mouth open. Seven did a spit take Rarity found most unfunny as she was the recipient of the spray and spittle. Snickers broke into laughter and Rarityslowly parsed what to say or do in this reprehensible situation. The taste of overtly sweet and fatty chocolate wafted over her tongue.

She realized suddenly why she tasted something other than tea, horror crossed her expression, then within three seconds her head was in the sink with the faucet in her mouth running at full speed. Whimpering and blubbering unintelligible words until water dribbled from her nostrils, Rarity sneezed loudly spraying the wall behind the sink with snotty water. Standing with poise, she brushed her wet mane from her eyes with her forehoof.

“Yes, on that note... I believe it’s time I lay down some of house rules. One, no innuendos of any kind, type, or manner at any time. Two, you will show respect to all ponies around you regardless of age, gender, or personal beliefs. Three, you will respect boundaries in my home. Both personal and professional, as this is where I work and live. Do you have any questions?”

She called two towels to herself and patted her coat until she was dry. A brush and comb appeared from the next room and ran through her mane while she listened to the colt.

Snickers looked at her, then to his drink floating in her magic. “Is this one of those deals where you lay down the rules and change them when something happens you didn’t expect? Because if it is, I’ll just add on number four; anything that happens can have a rule added at any time.”

Seven looked at the colt beside him with a raised eyebrow and Rarity smirked, then nodded. “Indeed, number four may be the most important of all. Now, let’s have a tour of the living areas and then the areas you shan’t bother by any means. As you’ll notice, I’m being specific so that you have fewer options to circumvent.

“Now, I do understand that no rule is absolute and without loopholes, so we’ll just adapt as events happen. I do hope the best from our future relationship.” Rarity left the room with the colts behind her, she looked back and Seven was following while Snickers was blushing and focusing on her hind hooves.

What could be bothering him? She wondered. “Eyes up, darling. The first room is actually the main room where I display my couture, take measurements, host fittings, and discuss the finer details with my clients. Behind those curtains are changing rooms as well as changing blinds scattered around for less timid or,” she chuckled, “more risque outfits some ponies request or prefer.”

She cleared her throat, pointing to an alcove in the back. “That area is where I work my fashionable magic. I keep my sewing machine and fabric there, and you can’t see it, but to the right is where it expands and I have a much larger work area, but between us I show the customers that part of the room to make it seem as though I work my magic with what little I have, making it seem even more impressive.

“Now, follow me to the upstairs where I’ll show you your room.” Then I’ll finish the forms, send Seven on his way to help other foals in need. Please, let this be as simple as, if not simpler than, other parents have it.

“Welcome to the second floor, beauty in simplicity.” Rarity led them around the hallway as she gestures and talked about the rooms. “Several rooms, three for guests located along the outer wall taking the same space reachable by going either direction.

“Two rooms belonging to myself and my sister, Sweetie Belle, are side by side. My inspiration room is there and is not for entry under any circumstances without my express permission.” She emphasised as she recalled Sweetie’s first time entering the room and how it just barely worked out.

“The bathroom is over around the way there and is fully furnished and always well stocked. You’ll notice it’s slightly larger than the other rooms, but the space is possibly the most important. I simply ask as to how one can make themselves look their very best without the space to do it in?

“My room is to the right, my sister’s room is just past, and your room, young colt, will be opposite the bathroom in the second guest bedroom, which is as far from my sister’s room as I could reasonably make it. Just so you know, the sound tends to carry at times, so anything said too loudly may be heard from up here.

The rooms are enchanted to dampen sound, but only if the enchantment is activated by touching one of two gems,” she led them to a spare room, “as you can see here. Blue activates the sound wards, which are designed to muffle or cancel sounds based on how loud they are. In the event an emergency occurs they will allow all sound through, so you needn’t worry.

The same goes for playing with friends and rough housing, the floors are sturdy enough for playing around as you young ones tend to do, and even though the whole building may seem fragile, it’s actually as sturdy as town hall.”

Rarity led them downstairs again, gesturing as she walked. “The roof is lined with hydrophobic cloth, the walls are insulated with wool from the healthiest of sheep and intertwined with a fire resistant gem matrix. The supports are inlaid with reinforcing stability enchantments, and there are additional ways the structure is as safe as anything could be, if not moreso.

“So, with that said, Snickers, you may explore the house, save for the rooms I’ve marked with chartreuse ribbons at the top of the doors. If there are no doors, the room is open to entry. You will be held accountable for anything that is damaged or goes missing,” she said flippantly, “so keep that in mind. If the door is closed, please knock; for Celestia’s sake, knock!”

“So, Rares, what now?”

She looked to the colt she could call her own now. “Please, don’t call me that. I am a Lady, you may call me Ma’am, Rarity, or Miss Rarity, but such uncouth nicknames from those I only just met are simply rude.”

Snickers glared at her while Seven was setting his paperwork in the kitchen leaving the two alone. “Yeah, I’m not calling you Mistress of anything. Ya know, I have to ask; what are you a Lady of?”

“Beg your pardon?”

“Yeah, what land do you own? How many servants do you have? Why’re you living in this podunk town when the capitol is right on the mountain over there?” He pointed through a window to Canterlot.

“Well, I never-”

“Get laid, I believe it!”

Rarity gasped in shock. “Young colt!”

“Old nag. See, I can call the obvious, too.”

“Go to your room! I’ll deal with you shortly.”

“You want me to go to your room? Pervert! Help, I need a responsible adult. Stranger danger,” he ran past her and into the kitchen where he lost his footing and slipped, landing hard onto his side. “Seven, you’ve gotta help me, she’s gonna do weird things to my most inner child. I’ll never grow up normal this way, she’s trying to get me into her room. Alone. I can see the lustful thoughts behind her eyes, just look at them! No, Mistress, I’ll be a good boy!” he awkwardly bowed to her to the amusement of noone else.

Ignoring the theatrics, Seven sorted his papers and pulled a pen from his saddlebag. “Miss Rarity, sign here, please.”

Rarity trotted to the elder colt and took the pen in her magic. “You do notice that there’s a colt right there that’s having some sort of manic attack, shouting about me doing deplorable things to him,” she casually said to Seven.”

“Do you intend to do any of the things he’s claiming?” Seven tapped the file containing Snickers’ patient files.

Rarity’s head shook at the shock of being asked that question by Seven. “What, certainly not! I am no monster that would ever prey upon--”

“Then don’t worry about it, he’s done this twice now. The first time was at the hospital, with a stallion nurse that was intent on helping him urinate, you’re the second. I heard your conversation just now and we know he likes to overdramatize certain things. We also wear a charmed pin, like the one I’m wearing that detects lies when I activate it.”

Rarity’s horn light shimmered and she smiled faintly. “Ah, a zirconia tied with woodworm and infused a peridot shard containing a Whisper enchantment. Well crafted, if I do say so myself. I think I’ll make a couple of my own, now that I know the gem needed and have access to an alchemist and an archmage.” Rarity signed the papers and watched as Snickers drank the last of his cool chocolate.

“There we are, I’ll have one last word with you before I leave.” Seven moved with her to the doorway. “Here’s a crystal linked to Foal Services, cast a color change cantrip on it and it’s twin there will do the same and we’ll react accordingly. Red for medical related emergency, blue for magical mishap, green for a found food allergy, white for danger to others, and pink for missing foal.

“If he’s lost more than six hours, turn it pink and we’ll arrive to figure out what to do from there. Any questions?”

“I believe I’ll have many over the next couple days, who can I turn to? Is there a color for that?” she asked and looked into the crystal.

“There are three licenced ponies nearby that can help in a time of need. A Miss Fluttershy works with anxiety and depression, mostly,” Rarity gave him a blank look while he spoke, “a Mrs. Lyra Heartstrings holds group meetings for creatures that aren’t sure of themselves or are unhappy with who they are.”

Rarity blinked and looked from the crystal to Seven. “That’s two, who’s the third?”

“I was getting to that. I haven’t met her, but Miss Rainbow Dash works with foals suffering from loss, abandonment, and social issues. Between us, she’s one of the best therapists outside of a metropolis when it comes to working with foals of his type. If you get a chance, have them meet and supervise as they connect.”

He smiled and after talking with her a little more for a few more minutes, he left her and Snickers alone together.

Well, this has been a day to remember, and it’s barely noon. I say, I should just handle this like a mother should, and so I shall.

There was a loud crash and clatter of porcelain shattering against the kitchen floor she knew too well from Sweetie’s mannerisms. “Sweetie Belle, what are y-OO-wah!”

Rarity slid across the floor, barely keeping her hooves on the wet floor until she’d reached about half way to the sink. That was when the chocolate powder, still forming a gummy paste, stopped her. She looked at the colt grinning cockily at her, then flinched when a cup of hot water splashed across her face and mane. “Did I make you wet just now? Whelp, I’ll be in your room if you need me.”

He stood and climbed across the counter quickly while Rarity grit her teeth and brought towels to dry her head. Snickers snickered and hopped to a well placed chair and then onto the carpeted floor before she could rationally call to him about her clean hooves rule. Rarity looked at the hoofprints he made and smirked smugly.

Now I show how easy parenting really is. I’ll just lay down the rules, scold him, and he’ll fold like origami.

Time Out

Before walking into her main room, Rarity took a moment to wipe her hooves with a towel to prevent tracks, then followed the hoof marks made by the colt upstairs to her room. She clenched her teeth behind closed lips and stormed into her room to see him wearing some scrap fabric she had on the floor, held closed with a series of closed pins she used for dressmaking. He was lying on his belly beside the bed looking through her diary.

“Put that down!”

“It is down,” he said without looking up from the open book on the floor. The book was pulled away from him and she looked at the page, sighing when it was a boring entry he’d only had time to glance through. “I can’t read those Wing Dings you unicorns use. Why can’t you just write like us dirt horses do.”

Rarity’s face twisted as anger built inside her. “How dare you use such language! And about your own tribe, it’s deplorable! Why are you so difficult,” she moved her diary to her vanity while looking at the colt.

“Obviously I wasn’t set to easy mode when I got here.”

If she had the notion for it, she’d have tugged his ear to the bathroom and given him a bar of soap. She recalled her own experiences and didn’t want to have him repeat them unless he kept being vulgar and disrespectful.

She inhaled deeply and exhaled just as quickly, resuming a calm smile. “Snickers, I understand you have some adjusting to do to your life with me. Since you’re comfortable and wearing... something, I’d like to talk with you for a little while. I have work that should be done, but you’re more important than anything anypony else may need of me at the moment.” She lay facing him from a leg’s length away.

“So, my name is Rarity. I was born and raised here in Ponyville. I aspire to be a world renowned fashion designer. I have a younger sister named Sweetie Belle who stays with me on occasion when my parents are unavailable or they need a break from her antics. Also, something I’ll trust you not to share...” she flicked her ears and looked at the door in the seconds of silence between them. “I read cheesy romance novels from time to time.”

She snickered into her hoof coyly while he looked at her; appraising her, judging her for what her game might be.

“Fine, my name here is Snickers. I don’t have any family, friends, or relatives. The ponies at the hospital watched everything I did and it was really weird, they overreacted to everything I did, even some self exploration in my alone time.” Rarity opened her mouth to comment but he dismissed her with a wave.

“I like peanut butter, reading erotic magazines for the articles and ads, and a few drinks with friends is always a good end to a day.” He snorted and stomped a hoof on the floor. “And, like, you guys have nothing fun, nothing to kill the time, and nothing to make life easier… life’s too boring here.”

Rarity nodded in understanding. “Yes, small towns have that way about them. When I get a chance to visit a metropolis like Manehattan or Canterlot, I make it a point to stay in public areas to feel the life of the city around me. Eating outside can be far more rewarding than hiding in a building behind a menu.”

He mouthed ‘That’s not what I meant.’ while rolling his eyes as she continued unabated. “Now, about something you said; may I ask?”

“Sure, I’m an open book with sticky pages.” He winked at her and her eyebrows twitched.

“Rules should and shall be followed; if you insist that you should continue speaking in such an uncouth manner I’ll be forced to use extreme measures to curb your language. However, right now I’m wondering what you believe constitutes overreaction in medical facilities?”

“I looked under a mare’s tail to see her junk since she had a rockin’ boo-tay!” He grinned at what he said until he saw her disapproving expression. “Anyway, there’s a needle in my neck and when I wake up I’m restrained in a room strapped to a bed. It was kinda fuzzy for a while, but that hot nurse totally kissed me while I was out of it. So hot, like a solid 8, for a pony.

“Later I wake up and then two hours of shrinks trying to get me to talk about my life had me wanting to jump out the window and see if I could grow magic wings.”

Rarity hummed outwardly while inside she was designing a fashionable set of pants he could wear, since he was so insistent on covering his stallion parts.

His following comment tore her thoughts to shreds. “And, so you know I’m not looking to dip my quill in some mares ink pot anytime soon, so no need to worry.”

Rarity huffed through her nose, bordering on an angry nicker. “Well, while that is good to know; your innuendo is quite unnecessary! While you’re in this house and under my care overall I want you to share nothing about your opinions on sexual matters at all. That is especially meant in public, around other foals, or around others in matters that may embarrass me or affect my business. Am I clear about that?”

“Ugh, you’re no fun at all,” he groaned and fell over to his side.

“Parenting is not meant to be fun, it is meant for an adult to keep a foal safe and fed while they learn at school and play with their friends. You should prepare yourself to fall into your role as my sister has.”

“Wait, what? You seriously think--”

Rarity got to her hooves and moved to the door. “Follow me, Snickers, and I’ll show you your room. I have hours of work to make up and in three hours your new sister will be here. You can introduce yourself and,” she looked behind herself to see him blushing and looking away again. “What’s wrong, are you feeling unwell?” she turned and touched his forehead with her fetlock.

He flinched back. “It’s not that… I’m kinda seeing a part of you I didn’t expect to see for a while.”

Her brows furrowed. “What are you talking about?”

“W-well... you have a really curly tail and…”

Rarity looked at him, surprised at how embarrassed he was as she realized he was noticing her choice of tail style and what she chose to keep exposed. She repressed a smirk. “Yes, it takes me quite a while to get it in such grand curls, but it’s worth it, wouldn’t you agree?” she turned and waved her tail while she strutted a couple paces.

She noticed him glance up to her tail and he averted his gaze. A final motion of her tail and she covered herself from his view as though it were a natural motion. “Well, in any case; If you want your tail done the same, all you need to do is ask, darling. Come, come, we mustn’t dawdle as there’s a lot to do.

“If you grow bored in your room there are books available in the waiting area downstairs. In the evening, baths are taken after supper and once taken going outside is all but forbidden. I won’t have any more little hoof prints across my carpet, young colt.”

She looked back and he was looking at her when she was talking, showing interest in what she was talking about. He was completely focused on her and what she was saying. Thinking of how cute he was when he blushed she swayed her tail and felt a laugh in her throat when his eyes left hers and darted to her rump, then to the floor as quickly as anypony could blink.

All males are the same. I love the attention, but I shouldn’t tease him. He doesn’t even have a cutie mark yet, what could...

Sweet Celestia, I’m teasing him! What is wrong with you, Rarity?! He’s not only a young colt, but he’s showing signs of sexual abuse and deviance far outside what is normal for foals twice his age because of his past; and here you are, flashing him like you’re trying to get him to notice you for romantic reasons.

Well, he clearly has noticed you, and it's clearly embarrassing him. It’s not the way he should be looking at a parental figure and it’s no way for me to behave. Gah, how could I forget he has a nudity taboo, that’s why he’s wearing that yard of cloth. Celestia’s left nipple, if I kept going as I was... exacerbating his issues is not going to help him adjust to society any faster than if I throw him in a kitchen alone with Pinkie, frosting, icing, and his illicit sense of humor.

Think before you act, Rarity! Do what’s actually right as a parent, for his sake.

Shaking her thoughts away she came back to the moment and realized she had led him to his room, so she opened the door.

“Well...” she cleared her throat and turned sideways, “here’s your room. It’s basically furnished with a bed, a bookshelf that we can fill with books starting tomorrow, a dresser for the clothes I’ll be making you, and the closet. Go in and read one of the encyclopedias or take a nap if it feels you must. Do you need anything before I leave you to your own devices? Very well then, I have to work on my commissions. If you need me, I’ll be just downstairs working.

“That is... after I clean up the kitchen area,” she clearly hinted.

Snickers was looking around the room. “Heh, you were really wet,” he quipped.

Rarity glared at the colt as he looked under his bed and she resisted the urge to make a retaliatory comment to the new addition to her family. “Yes,” she said forcing politeness, “if you’d be willing, I’d appreciate it if you could help me clean all that mess up.”

His head came out from under the bed and he looked at her, restraining a grin. “Uh, no. You can clean up from getting all wet and dripping on the floor. Kinda nasty to ask a kid to help with that.”

A quiet growl escaped Rarity as her face heated in embarrassment and frustration as she left his room. Her magic gripped the door handle and pulled, closing the door loudly as he started to laugh at her. She moved swiftly down the stairs and into the kitchen to clean up the mess they had made. “I swear, that colt is a test to every bit of self control I have. It’s alright, Rarity. Just learn with him and we’ll both be fine in the long run… and buy lots of bar soap”

Finishing the cleaning, Rarity put the laundry in the hamper and got to work. Time flew by so quickly she didn’t notice the time until Sweetie Belle called to her from the foyer. She set her fabric down, put her design plans in a neat pile, made sure her sewing machine was secure, and placed her glasses down all at the same time.

She made it out in time to give her sister a hug and ushered her into the kitchen before the filly could complain. “Sweetie! It’s so nice to see you, how was school? Fun and exciting, I hope? Care for some hot chocolate after such a long day away?”

“Uh, yeah... why’re you acting weird, Rarity?”

“What? Me? Nervous? Can’t I show my sister affection for little to no reason?”

Sweetie thought on that. “Yeah, but usually you just tell me to go play with my friends.”

“Well, speaking of friends, I have a bit of news that will certainly excite you! You have a new friend to play with.”

“Really?!” Sweetie hopped around Rarity in the kitchen. “Is she my age, does she have a cutie mark?! Does she like carrot sprinkle cupcakes? Will I like her mane? Can she sleep over? Is she going to stop by soon, or is she going to get here on the train-” she gasped, “is it Babs? Did Applejack tell you it’s Babs?”

“No, no, no,” Rarity interjected, smiled, then sighed, “it’s much more complicated than any of that. Can you take a seat, this is going to be a lot to talk about and I don’t know how much time we--”

“Hey Rarity, does this whole thing fit? I mean it’s as long as I am!”

Sweetie looked at the speaker, wondering if it was the new filly given the voice. Her mouth fell open at what she saw. Rarity noticed her sister’s reaction and turned to see Snickers. Her mind raced and the world seemed to slow to a crawl as she saw what he had kicked to the carpeted threshold.

Her horn lit suddenly with barely a thought from her, then with a bright flash the object of her private plebeian personal pleasures she at times used in place of a Prince Consort related to a close friend of hers vanished.

He balked at the spot her long friend once was and nearly leapt in excitement. “Wow, that was awesome! I didn’t know you could teleport stuff, can you get me a sammich?” Snickers grinned at her having gotten the reaction he wanted. Then he noticed the filly at the table, staring at him in shock. “Oh, hey, I guess you’re Sugar Belle?”

“Rarity,” Sweetie said as her sister covered her face with her forelegs and whimpered in embarrassment, “who’s that colt... and is that the ‘Mister Ed’ you yell at sometimes?”

Rarity growled as she turned a darker shade of pink from her withers to her muzzle. “Not another word on the matter, Sweetie Belle!” She snapped while glaring at the colt. Snickers looked at the carpet under his hooves and mouthed Sweetie’s name, committing it to memory.

“But, Rarity, who’s that colt? Is he the new friend you were talking about?”

“Hi, I’m Snickers. I’m honored to meet you and hope to be a good nephew to you.”

“What?! Rarity? You had a foal and didn’t tell me?! When did you have time for that? Do mom and dad know?” Sweetie hesitated between thoughts. “Where do foals come from?” she asked with one ear perked, showing curious interest that Rarity didn’t need right now.

Rarity looked at her sweet innocent sister, then he had to chime in. “I bet her parents wanna know about Mister Ed.”

My sweet innocent sister is going to be corrupted by this colt if I don’t snip this strand before the whole ensemble falls apart!

Sweetie and her nephew shared a giggle and bumped hooves while Rarity frowned and cleared her throat. “That is enough from the both of you! Snickers, what did I tell you about going into my room?”

“You left the door open and I was bored.”

“So you had to go through my personal things?!” She barely restrained herself from screaming at him, but got close.

“Hey, in my defense; I was following your open door policy,” he motioned making a tally mark, “and it was in a frilly box under your bed just begging to be looked at.” He paused and she could see his face twisting as he restained another cocky grin. “Do you give him a bath before snuggles or after?”

Sweetie snorted and started giggling into her hooves. “Why would she give Mr. Ed a bath?”

“Young colt, your behavior is unacceptable!”

“What?! I’m following your rules and I just asked a question. You’re the one freaking out over something a wittle cowt my age is asking about things I don’t know anything about that make you uncomfowtabow?”

Rarity glared at him while he stood and looked at her smugly. “Sweetie Belle?” She asked sharply without taking her eyes off him.

“Yeah, sis?” Sweetie responded with another question on her mind.

Rarity spoke in the most serious voice she could muster. “I need you to go get Fluttershy for me as I have need of her time and skills in a private matter. Don’t rush, I have to take care of something while you’re out.”

Taking the cue, Sweetie trotted past Snickers and gave him a sad, knowing look that he didn’t comprehend. “See ya in a bit.”

Snickers winked at Sweetie and started again. “Hurry up, if I call for help and no one else is around no pony can stop her from trying to ra--” Rarity closed his mouth with her magic to silence him.

“Lock the door when you leave,” Rarity commanded lastly. She watched as Sweetie galloped from the room and when the door opened she released his mouth. Before he could comment again she gripped his ear and dragged him to the downstairs bathroom.

He yelped and tried to resist only to learn his ears were far more sensitive than he thought they were. Nothing he did or said stopped her as she pulled him into the bathroom behind her and she admitted to herself that she felt somewhat giddy for what was about to be done to him.

Limits

Snickers gagged, coughed, hacked, and struggled. Bubbles formed from his nostrils and stung all the way to the back of his throat. Tears slowly dribbled from his eyes. All the while Rarity used her magic to hold his ear tips in the air while alternating between bars of soap. One would be under a slow stream of water while the other brushed along his tongue from front to back.

She removed the soap from his mouth and he spit at her hooves. “Once again, are you going to speak vulgary around others?”

“When you go to sleep, I’m gonna stick Mister Ed so far in your a-” he started and then the struggle resumed, started by his muffled word interrupted by bar soap. At least it was fruit flavored, he thought.

“Honestly, it’s been three mintues! How are you so defiant in the face of such a punishment?!”

She removed the soap bar and he spat soap on her foreleg, less forcefully this time with his eyes closed tightly. “I have to see you, nothing’s much worse than that,” he said in a softer voice.

“Why, you insufferable…” she tugged his right ear getting a yelp from him, once his mouth was open she stuck the freshly wettened bar of soap in his mouth and brushed his tongue again, scraping extra bits on his teeth with her renewed pressure.

“Cease your vulgarity and soap will never again touch your tongue!” She spent several more seconds with her ministrations before he finally mumbled loudly and waved a foreleg. Taking it out again, she listened. “What have you to say?”

He coughed phlegm and his breath reeked of wildberry. “I’m sorry! Alright? Shit,” he looked at her with eyes ready to spill tears and, in a sharp motion, he closed his mouth, using the same foreleg he waved to cover his lips. “I’m sorry, Miss Rarity! Please, no more. I can’t...” he said from behind his hoof. He shook his head as tears finally began to run down his cheeks.

She hummed and squinted her eyes, looking at the expression on his face. Her magic faded and he slumped over, coughing roughly. “Very well then. You now what will happen if you speak of horrid things, such as being forced into sexual acts by ponies, it’s not a joke to use those words so callously and flippantly.

“Now, would you like some water to clean your mouth of that foul taste?”

He nodded and when he looked up he saw she’d already prepared some water for him. He took the drink between his hooves and sipped, but before he could swish his mouth he gagged. Rushing at Rarity, who moved aside just in time, he reached the toilet as his body vacated the soap from his belly.

Now she felt terrible. She thought his attitude to be his personality, a well crafted ego built from years of abuse. Now she looked at a young colt acting age; crying, honestly apologetic, and genuinely miserable.

She’d never gotten the mouth scrubbing he had received, she didn’t know the extent of soap he must have swallowed. She held his mane along his neck with her magic and rubbed his back with her hoof. “I’m so sorry, Snickers. I never meant to make you vomit, but you’ll be okay. This’ll pass and I pray we never have to repeat it.”

Tears smeared her mascara for the second time that day as she comforted the colt until he was done. She carefully cleaned his teeth of soap with water, toothpicks, and cotton balls, then helped him rinse the soap from his mouth a final time.

"There we are, my parents never once helped me clean the taste of soap from my mouth, so you know."

He signed. "Yeah, whatever…"

They sat on the floor of the bathroom, his body trembled from something not related to the soap, but she didn’t know what exactly. “Snickers, I really am sorry for how long that lasted. I don't know if I could have handled your punishment in a different way… also, I don’t expect you to understand, just that someday you’ll accept my apology.”

He snorted and whimpered, looking up at her with the saddest eyes she’d seen in months on any creature. Her heart ached for him and she leaned in to hug him. He stiffened at the contact for a couple of seconds before melting into her hug and letting go of his emotional stress. He cried in her embrace, hugging her back for a few seconds before just letting his forehead balance him on her.

The whole time she felt horrible for what she’d done; even though it was necessary and may show better results than a stern talking to.

Minutes passed before he calmed enough to move back from her. He snorted in good humor when he saw her coat, covered with sudsy snot and tears along her underbelly from her collarbone to her teats. “I’m sorry about what I said...” he admitted quietly while avoiding her eyes, favoring his own hooves, “it’s just been a really sh-” he looked up at her and reworded his thought, “I mean it’s been a really weird week for me.”

She handed him a white plastic cup half full of water. “Would you like to talk about it, really talk about it this time?”

He hesitated then shook his head. “Maybe later, but not now.” He wiped his eyes with his forelegs and looked at is leg, then at her, then back to his leg. “Your eyelashes are on my leg,” he said flatly.

Rarity let a little humor into her voice. “Well, I did buy them from a traveling salesmare.”

He slowly looked at her eyelashless eye, then he snickered. She did the same and then they fell into a giggle fit, ending shortly after when there was a loud knock on the front door. “Ah, that would be Sweetie Belle. She must have found Fluttershy faster than I’d expected. Would you like to walk with me to the door? Miss Fluttershy’s a very nice mare and she’d be very happy to meet you before I have a private talk with her.”

He shook his head. “No, I… I just wanna bath, if that’s okay?”

She hummed in thought and debated with herself on the matter. “Can you go a few more hours without one? I only ask because you can share a bath with Sweetie tonight to save time, and you can also go outside to play as opposed to having to wait possible hours if you change your schedule right now.”

Unsure of how to take the idea of sharing a bath with a female, he put it aside and sighed in defeat. “I’ll be in my room then, I have a lot to think about and maybe I’ll meditate on stuff.”

She smiled, gesturing for him to leave the bathroom first. “That sounds wonderful, I’ll have Sweetie go play with her friends and I’m certain you’ll see the trio of them within two hours. I only ask,” she said as they reached the point in their walk where they’d have to split up, “that you stay inside my boutique or just around the exterior.

“There are a lot of distractions you don’t need on your first day here; one of them is running around town when you don’t know anything about it or those who live within.”

He nodded. “Yeah, I get it. Don’t worry, I really need time alone right now. I swear I won’t run away or hurt myself.”

“I certainly hope not, and if you have such inclinations you may speak with anypony about them,” she said with kindness and hope in her voice and eyes.

They split, him climbing the stairs and her going to the door while checking back at him with worry and concern. Why would he be so specific on what he wouldn’t do? Oh, I hope Fluttershy is available and skilled enough to help him.

She nearly reached the door when it swung open just missing her muzzle by an inch. “Rarity, I’m back with Fluttershy and I had a question!”

“Sweetie Belle, what have I told you about shoving doors open? You nearly took my head off with that little action,” she scolded the filly. “What’s your question, Sweetie?”

“Can I take a bath with Mister Ed tonight? He might make a good bath toy.”

Rarity grimaced and felt Fluttershy looking at her, through her eyes and into her very soul in an action that was nearly the Stare. “Rarity… why are you showing Mister Ed to your little sister?”

Rarity shook her head at Fluttershy and took a step back from the typically timid mare. “I didn’t, honest! It was a joke in poor taste by Snickers, but I fixed the issue and that’s just one of the reasons I wanted to speak with you. Sweetie, you may go play with your other Crusaders,” she said urgently, “now!”

“Ugh, but Rarity! I wanna show Mister Ed to my friends, can’t I take him with me?”

“No!” both mares said loudly and in near perfect synchronization. Sweetie stomped her hind hoof on the floor and stormed away for several steps before turning into a happy trot with her tail swaying and ears perked up as though nothing had happened.

“Fluttershy, please come in. I’m desperately in need of your help.”

Fluttershy looked past Rarity and then walked in cautiously. She lay on one of Rarity’s guest lounges and got comfortable as Rarity did the same across from her. “How can I help you, Rarity? I was surprised to run into your sister while I was going outside town to check on a family of birds that might be traveling though, if the rumors are correct.”

“Yes, while I feel for your concerns about the birds, I have an addition to my household that needs your attention as a therapist.”

Fluttershy’s ears attention were now focused on Rarity. “Oh, my. I wasn’t aware you knew.”

“I didn’t, not until a couple hours ago. I’ve taken a foster foal and he is in need of emotional guidance, here’s his file from the Ministry. Please, read it over and go help him. I haven’t the patience at the moment with the way my day has gone so far.”

Fluttershy took the file between her forelegs but didn’t open it. “Um, there’s a lot more to working with a pony than it seems. It’s a long process that may take years and isn’t ever a quick fix for a problem.”

“I don’t see a problem with that, as long as you can curb his more unsavory actions. As per the Ministry’s guidelines, he’s to be enrolled in the school by week’s end and begin thereafter. He has a vulgar streak since walking into my home longer than my tail and he’s acting out in the worst ways…

“Then, just a few minutes ago he cried into my,” she looked down and sighed at her unkempt coat, “once glorious coat. I’ll need a grooming for this soon.” she patted her chest and smoothed out the parts he nuzzled into.

“It sounds like he’s confused and very stressed, and probably acting out in frustration rather than anger. Can you give me an example of how he’s been?”

“Easily, he threw hot chocolate powder at me and doused me with hot water from the sink, then commented on how wet he’d gotten me.”

Fluttershy covered her mouth with her hoof in surprise. “Oh my, that’s not how a colt should act at all.”

“Of that I’m certain.”

Fluttershy inhaled deeply and smiled. “I was wondering why you smelled like chocolate, though. And now I know why,” she giggled when Rarity smiled. “I’ll read this quickly and let you know how I can help him. If that’s okay with you, that is.”

“Fluttershy, how many times must we tell you?” The folder opened and Rarity figuratively bit her tongue. She read a magazine she’d skimmed several times that month while Fluttershy worked, finishing with a thoughtful hum. “Well?”

Fluttershy closed the folder and pushed it closer to Rarity. “I’ve seen these kinds of reports before, most in my training or during refresher classes. I know to take these with several grains of salt,” she scowled at the file. “While under supervision, everything is scrutinized and exaggerated when written down so the future helpers know what to look for, more than what actually happened.

“Except for the part where he,” she averted her gaze, “pleasured himself over time, and kissed the nurse, there isn’t really anything in this that says he’s really a problem child any more than a foal his age should be.”

“But, Fluttershy, he got me wet with chocolate and spoke in the most vulgar way to me. He went through my things and kicked my lovely Mister Ed across my house and I,” she furrowed her brows, “don’t actually know where I sent it. I hope it didn’t go far, or else I’ll have to really take care of him… Celestia forbid, replace him.”

“Rarity,” Fluttershy said with a little more confidence than Rarity was expecting, “we’re talking about something more important right now. I know he may be acting out, but he’s adapting to his new environment. There’s bound to be some stress on you both while he learns about you and your own rules and limits.”

“That… makes a lot of sense, actually. Would you like to meet him, or…”

“I’d love to meet him,” Fluttershy replied quickly, “if this is a good time for you, that is.”

“Of course, darling. Come, I believe he’s in his room. I just finished giving him the treatment for foul language, but he may still harbor such inclinations. Just, be prepared for language most unbecome a child his age.”

“I understand. Angel bunny has quite foul language when frustrated, so I don’t see how much worse it can be.”

“So he must only speak in foul language, then?” Rarity quipped. Fluttershy blushed and looked away. “Oh my, I do apologize. I hadn’t meant to bring to light such an issue you have to deal with. On a change of topic, the colt seems to wear clothes, but only across his rear half. Currently he’s covered with some scrap cloth. He has a habit of looking intently at a mare’s lady bits, but when I make eye contact he averts his gaze.”

“Oh,” Fluttershy looked behind her and made sure her tail was covering herself, “do you think I’ll be safely covered by my tail, or should I puppy it?”

“Puppy… ah, no, you’ll be fine. If you’re worried just keep facing him and he won’t have the opportunity. In my case, I believe I’ll have to devise something to cover myself until he becomes acclimated to our nudity. It truly is taboo to him, it seems, and my choice of unique style and grandeur is too much for him.

“I’ve thought of turning my curls more tightly or trimming my tail to more of a floof, maybe a short braid… but none match my artistic flair that I’m known for. I’d need to change my mane style as well to match or accent my tail as curls don’t mesh well with a pompom style. Then, I wonder… Fluttershy, do you think a scarf, neckerchief, or perhaps an ascot matching my mane color would work?

“Oh! My eyes, the scarf could match my eyes. Heh, perhaps a collar with a ring to show my lovely adventurous side, rather than my current flirtatious and daring nature to challenge the norm. Ah, here we are, Fluttershy. Just a moment and it’ll be the two of you.”

Rarity looked back to make eye contact with Fluttershy, who was looking at the file held in her wings. “Uh-hum.”

“Fluttershy! Have you heard a word I’ve said?”

“Uh-hum.” Rarity swished her tail near the file and startled her friend into dropping it and scattering its loose pages. “I’m sorry, Rarity, I’m just focusing on Snickers. I’ll listen this time if you want to tell me again.”

“No, that’s fine. I was just talking about reformations to my entire style and wardrobe, possibly the ramifications they’ll have on my clothing lines. Nothing important I’d share at the moment again, but the next time we’re at the spa I expect your input on my concerns.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll help you then. I won’t let you down.”

Rarity knocked on the door and listened. There was a clambering and she took that as a reason to open the door. “Snickers, there’s somepony I’d love for you to-- Gyah! What the Tartarus are you four doing?!”

Misunderstandings

I was feeling sad after the whole soap thing. I wasn’t going to do it, but I broke down after the stress of all this crap got to me and I cried into Rarity’s chest like some little kid that scraped his knee. I left her to chill in my room, maybe look at the ceiling and count tiles, but there aren’t any. It’s a flat surface that’s polished to the point I can see my reflection somewhat. A weird thing unless she’s that vain or loved to watch herself and Mister Ed have one on one time.

I’ve always figured her room to have actual mirrors, because she is actually that vain.

I was lying on my bed lost in thought when I heard a scratching at my window. I looked at it, thinking it was some bird or squirrel until a red bow rose into view, bobbing and turning like the head it was on couldn’t decide where to look. A bright candy apple red mane showed up next, then a yellow muzzle. Overall she was cute and wearing a weary expression.

Her hooves pressed on the glass and she leaned as close to the surface as she could, looking in to see me. Once she found me she grinned and leaned back pointing, then she flailed her arms almost falling back while shouting something at the sound resistant glass. She fell toward the window and stopped herself against the pane with her hooves, true worry in her eyes.

I sighed, got up, and eventually opened the window to hear the rush of small town noise fill my room and ears. “Heya! Ah’m Apple Bloom, can I come in?”

“Why’re you at my window?” I asked flatly.

“Because Rarity’s downstairs and won’t like it if we come in unannounced.”

“So climbing to my window is a better option than talking with the adults and letting them know you’re here?”

“Apple Bloom, are you going in or just gonna hang out all day?”

“Ah’m goin, Scootaloo! Keep yer shoes on. “Anyway, can ya step aside fer a second?”

“No, you’re not welcome in my room.”

“Ha, Sweetie said you were funny.” Apple Bloom said as she scrambled in through the window and landed in a somersault with her head on the floor and her rear in the air, exposing herself and I saw pink; my head swam from the blood rushing into it. I averted my eyes and staggered to the side, sitting on my flank to steady myself.

“Are ya feelin’ okay? Ah can get ya a glass of water if ya need it.”

I shook my head, which was a bad choice, denying her offer. “No, it’s fine. I just have a problem seeing your personal parts.”

She looked at me funny, her head cocked to the side and an ear drooped. “What’d’ya mean? My whole body is my personal part. Oh, you mean my bow?” she reached up to adjust it. “It’s okay, you can touch it if you want.”

“The last thing I wanna do it touch it! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean… you know what? Hi, I’m Snickers, nice to meet you.”

Her demeanor changed to one of happiness and she grabbed me by my wrist thing with both her hooves and shook me with too much strength and force. When she was done I had felt like I’d just done extensive stretches and strained my muscles. “Yeah, Ah’m Apple Bloom. Ya know Sweetie Belle, and that there comin’ up now is Scootaloo. We have an introduction ta give ya once we’re all here.”

Scootaloo hopped through the window landing like a cat in stride, not missing a beat between falling and walking. “Hey, I’m Scootaloo. You’re Sweetie’s new brother, huh?”

“Actually I’m her nephew, by technicality. Are you her sisters or cousins?”

Sweetie climbed to the window and hesitated, seemingly unable to climb in. “I wish, they’d be the best actual sisters ever!” She squeaked. “Can you guys help me in?”

“Oh yeah, c’mon Scootaloo!”

“Psh, she bumps her horn once and can’t climb in a window ever again.”

“Scootaloo, that’s not a nice thing to say. You know she’s sensitive about that.”

Sweetie grunted when she was pulled in and fell with her rear on the floor. The others let her forelegs go and she fell, hopping to her hooves with a happy bounce. “That’s because it’s really sensitive. It hurt and gave me a headache for hours, mostly.”

I looked at the bony protrusion. “So, you can feel with your horn? How’s that work, and don’t say magic.”

“Ha, unicorns can’t feel through their horns,” Scootaloo replied for Sweetie, “but the base can be really sensitive.”

“Yeah,” Sweetie lowered her horn and tapped the tip. “I feel that, but only as pressure on my skull. If I bump it too hard my horn’ll break and it’ll take weeks to heal naturally. Not to mention the pain I’d be in for a bunch of reasons.”

“Sweetie, did you tell us once about a mare that broke her horn at the base and--”

“C’mon, gals. Enough talkin’ about that depressin’ stuff. Snickers, the three of us make up the Cutie Mark Crusaders and we’d like ya to join up. You ain’t got yer cutie mark and you’d be the first colt member!”

The trio looked at me intently, hopefully. “Nah, I’m good without one.” I shrugged and got up so I could distance myself from them a bit.

“What?!” they called in amazing harmony. Apple Bloom ran beside me and blocked me. “What’re you talkin’ about? Gettin’ yer cutie mark’s the most important thing there is in a pony’s life!”

I looked at her, then behind me to my flank, then at the fillies looking at me, in my eyes and not on my butt. “Apple Bloom, that’s ridiculous. There’s a ton of important things that’re more important than getting branded.”

“Branded?!” Once again they shouted in unison. Scootaloo ran to my other side. “No one brands colts anymore, you’re not property and Miss Cheerilee said that treating males like property is like slavery and that’s bad.”

“Yeah,” Sweetie squeaked her way into the conversation while running around to stand directly in front of me. “We had to apologize to all the colts in class and then after school we got homework to apologize to every stallion we passed at least once to make up for the Day of One Thousand Sorrows.”

The three fillies pouted and actually looked sad. “We’re sorry, Snickers, for what our ancestors did.”

What is it with these three talking in perfect unison. It’s like one voice almost, in stereo.

“Uh, yeah. Sure… you’re forgiven for whatever you said. Now that that weirdness is over, I was having a good time on my bed and looking at the--”

“On your bed? Cool, let’s jump on it, too!” Scootaloo turned the conversation topic from me as expertly as she turned herself and climbed onto the bed with a little buzz of her wings. It wasn’t that high, I think she just needed the exercise; those were freakishly tiny wings, even for a kid.

“I dunno, jumping on beds is kinda unsafe. Like, what if I fall off and break my neck and you have to push me around in a wheelchair and feed me for the rest of my life?”

I was expecting a poor response to my quip. What I got was a muzzle under my tail that shoved me hard enough to toss me into the air where I was again shoved by what I presume to be a magic blast thing from the little marshmallow. I was in a half dozen states of freaked out. Not only was I falling without any style, I was in shock from getting blasted in my ribs and it stung a lot, but most on my mind was that I just had some girl’s nose pressed between my nuggets before she flung me like a pizza maker tosses pizza.

I landed on the bed and for some god awful reason I didn’t bounce the way physics would indicate and fly off into the wall lips first, leaving red paint where I’d have landed. No, I bounced straight up and was eye level with the purpleish orangey pegasus. Her grin was sickening and I was going to comment on it, but then I fell because science works sometimes.

I landed on my side and bounced again, this time I saw the other two and heard the trio giggling like idiots as they bounced and took me with them. I actually don’t think they knew I was along for the ride against my will, everytime I tried to tell them I’d land and the air would escape me. After about thirty seconds, though, I started to have fun.

I may not have laughed like a madman that just reinvented the ampersand, but I certainly felt that happy sensation I get when I’m feeling good with other people. I made only one mistake the whole time I was along for the ride, and that was to try to take control of my own jumping. I twisted and tried to land on my hooves.

The landing was a perfect ten, the fact I kept my centrifugal force was either an eight or a two, whichever is the bad end of the spectrum. My hooves left the bed and I spun on all three axis taking the fillies legs from under them. We all crashed on the bed and my head landed heavily on Sweetie’s flank jarring me.

“Snickers, there’s somepony I’d love for you to-- Gyah! What the Tartarus are you four doing?!”

I felt the girls jolt and then scramble on the bed as I put a hoof to my head. “What a ride.” I said it as a statement, not a joke. The tug on my ear was not the response I was expecting, neither was being dragged from the bed barely faster than I could get my hooves under me.

“Young colt, I thought we just had a discussion about your manners, and I find you trying to mount my sister and her friends?!”

My eyes went as wide as I thought they could. I first tried to shake my head, which was a very bad idea because my ear. I tried to talk, but once again my ear.

“Rarity! Put, him, down.”

The magic holding my ear abated instantly and I fell in a heap on the floor, my ear covered by my pastern. I tried to hold them back, but the tears started and again I was crying. I was wrapped in a hug by an adult that was radiating love and caring, followed by a couple more bodies that were my size.

“We’re sorry, Snickers, we didn’t ever want you ta get in trouble.”

“Yeah, if I could I’d take it back and wouldn’t have made you jump, too.”

“I’ll give you some of my dessert tonight after supper, if that’ll help.”

Those three fillies were just kinder to me than any event in my recent memory. It wasn’t after soap torture, or tying me in a padded room, or anything else. They were just sorry, in the innocent way children are supposed to be. I heard Rarity whispering and the girls left the hug, I heard the door close, and then there was silence in the room except for my noises.

I sniffled and looked up at the yellow mare who was holding me and I swear I heard bells chime and a harp when I saw her. She was silhouetted by the sun and her wings were partially open giving her the perfect visage of an angel. She was so beautiful I covered my mouth and gasped in awe at her, tears running anew down my cheeks and onto my legs.

“Oh, Snickers, what’s wrong? Do you need anything? How can I help you?”

Her voice was the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard that wasn’t forced or synthesized, it was natural in all its beauty. I sobbed again, but this time it was more in reverence at her. If I was so inclined I’d find religion for the first time and know what to do when meeting a disciple of some heavenly being. Instead I whined and pressed my hooves tighter against my mouth, afraid I’d offend her with my voice as it was.

She looked at me with so much concern and worry I felt like her eyes were gazing into my very soul with absolute purity, and I cried again. This time it was a deep cry, is the best way I can describe it. I bellowed my little voice into her chest and the tighter she held me the more the stress and pain from my life left me.

I was a foal in the arms of an angel, and I was finally safe from everything and everyone that every meant me harm.

Counselling

“Rarity, why’d you do that to Snickers?!”

“Yeah, he’s your son! You’re supposed to love him and care about him.”

“Instead, yer tuggin’ his ears like a thief grabbin’ unripe zap apples!”

“Fillies, please. I’ve had a difficult enough day than to have to hear you three prattle on about-”

“No,” Sweetie shouted getting the train of ponies to stop, “what’s gotten into you? You’re weird all day, you smell like chocolate when I get home and don’t have any to make me a drink. You tell me I’ve got a nephew out of the blue--”

“Yeah, and she told us you weren’t very nice to him when you introduced him to her,” Scootaloo pushed her way between Sweetie and Rarity, followed by Apple Bloom.

“And ya were talkin’ about some Mister Ed more than ya were carin’ about bein’ all polite so he had ta innerduce himself. That ain’t like ya, Miss Rarity.”

Rarity pressed a polished and smoothed hoof to a spot between her eyes she learned to be a personal pressure point. “Girls, it’s been a very confusing and difficult day. I’m behind on my work, I’ve fostered a foal just this morning…” She looked down at the girls, who were looking between one another somberly.

“Sis, you mean he’s an orphan or something?”

“Or something is more apt,” Rarity mumbled. The gasp the girls made took a second to register with Rarity, who then mentally winced. “No, I don’t mean he’s any of the above. Girls, come with me to the showroom and I’ll tell you all, okay?”

The trio nodded and followed closely to one another while Rarity led them to a small nook she rarely used for relaxing with a good book or to clear her mind. The trio sat on a cushion together that fit one adult mare, Rarity lay on a stout couch across from them. The window was so clear it didn’t seem like it was there, save for the shimmer of enchantments running across its surface that performed a function the fillies didn’t know about, yet.

“Girls, about Snickers. He’s what adults would call a difficult child.”

Sweetie snorted. “So, I live with you and you’re difficult.”

“Yeah, and we don’t tug your ears or bite your nose when we’re upset.”

“So, why’d’ya think it’s alright ta do to him?”

“Huh?” They chorused in a challenge.

Rarity hummed and thought of a good way to handle the situation at their level. “Girls, there are bad parents out in the world.” She waited and their attention became curious. “There are good parents who care for their foals, they feed them, love them, and help them grow. Then there are bad parents who don’t do any of those things, or do them in a bad way. Such as in exchange for things inappropriate for children to do.”

“So,” Apple Bloom looked between her friends, “like makin’ their foals shingle the roof?”

“Or fix their wagon?”

Sweetie hopped, hoping her answer would win. “Making their little sister stand still for hours while her older sister uses her as a dress stand?”

Rarity looked at her sister intently until the filly calmed and sat close to her friends again while Rarity started again.

*…*

Fluttershy held Snickers in her forelegs, her wings fanning slowly to create a current around him that soothed him by brushing the hairs of his coat across his body.

He pulled back and sniffled, looking up at Fluttershy he made sounds like he was going to either hyperventilate or cry again. She lay on her belly and used one of her primary feathers to brush along his muzzle and wipe tears away.

"Why are you so sad? Is there anything I can do to help?"

He sniffled and leaned his cheek into her feathers. He opened his mouth and inhaled a deep shaky breath. Tears spilled from his eyes when he blinked, opening his eyes clearer than before.

He stood and took a hesitant step back from her getting a curious reaction from her. Then, shaking across his front, he lowered his barrel to the floor and touched his nose to the carpet.

Fluttershy sat up and covered her mouth. "Oh, my. Please. I don't know why… Snickers, please, don't bow to me." She pressed her hoof to the carpet and cupped his chin in the frog of her hoof.

"Please, open your eyes." There was a hesitation before he opened them and she gasped at the depth of pain and sorrow she could feel. "You've been through so much, haven't you?"

He nodded, staying in contact with her hoof. When she pulled away he moved with her until she was outside his reach. "No."

She brought her hoof back to him and he rested his cheek against it. "The first word you've said to me… I thought it'd be something more profound, given your recent history."

"What should I say?" He asked quietly with his eyes closed.

“Whatever you’re feeling or maybe if something is bothering you, I’m here for you.”

He opened his eyes feeling calmer than he might have ever felt. “Okay… I... don’t know what to say.”

“Well, my name is Fluttershy and I’m a pegasus. But, I often feel I should be an earth pony because I love all the little creatures. And sometimes I would like to be a unicorn because the magic would make it really easy to help me take care of my little friends’ needs and I’d have more time.

“I was born and spent my first four years in Cloudsdale, then I fell into my current life, and… well, nothing much has happened between then and now that I’d like to talk about without knowing you a little better. Your turn?”

He smiled and sniffled, wiping his nose with his leg. “Well, I’m Snickers. I’m old enough to know better, but I just don’t care. I’ve been in Equestria for a long time, but… not really at the same time. It’s hard to explain, but it’s so beautiful here I can’t imagine living anywhere else, not for the rest of my life, if I’m lucky.

“I was stuck at an asylum for a few days before here, and nothing really happened there, so yeah. That’s me,” he finished with a shrug.

Fluttershy knew a bit more about him, but also knew to take the report with a grain of salt, and she intended to learn the truth about him no matter how long it took. “Um… there’s a lot of talk about you… um… personal private time that nopony should be with you during, and… I was… um…”

“Do you mean my sexual nature?” She eeped and cringed back, then hesitantly nodded. “Sheesh, we don’t have to talk about it. You’re obviously uncomfortable.”

“I-it’s just that you’re so open.”

“That’s what she said… wait…” Snickers thought about the lackluster jest, then looked at Fluttershy and cowered back from her glare. “I’m sorry, Miss Fluttershy.”

“I’m not alright with young colts or fillies talking like poorly mannered adults. It really upsets me and that’s not what ponies should make each other feel. Also,” she relaxed with an exhale, “I’m only Fluttershy, I don’t need any titles.”

“Y-yes, Miss Fluttershy. I’m sorry, Fluttershy!”

“Oh, please, don’t be worried. I won’t be upset with you as long as you’re a nice colt and you treat others with respect. Can you do that for me?” she asked, this time she had realized what had caused such a dramatic reaction and took advantage. She opened her wings and sat until she was blocking the light. He nodded, eyes wide in awe at her visage.

“Very good. Now then, Snickers, would you like to talk about your day?”

He gulped wetly and watched her as she lay down at his level. “Uh, yeah… if that’s okay with you… Fluttershy.”

She smiled when he spoke her name. It wasn’t very becoming of a stallion to fawn over her, but a colt was certainly adorable. “Whenever you’re ready, you may begin.”

*...*

Rarity sat in her spot holding Sweetie against her underbelly, forelegs crossed over the filly’s own crossed forelegs. “So, do you understand now?”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom sat in contemplation. “So, what yer sayin’... is that Snickers has a mysterious past that we’re supposed to teach him to be comfortable with…”

“...So that he can tell us about it and not feel embarrassed or ashamed because there’s nothing in anypony’s past they should feel bad about at our age.” Scootaloo finished. Rarity nodded and the duo pumped their hooves in success.

“Rarity?” Sweetie asked. “What if we ask him about his past? Can we just do that and save time?”

Rarity rested her chin atop Sweetie’s mane and gently rocked from side to side. “No, darling. The reason he’s meeting with Fluttershy right now is to show him he can feel safe around adults. If you ask he may distrust you, or everypony around him. It’s happened before, but foals run away from things they distrust.”

Scootaloo covered her mouth. “I don’t want him to leave, he just got here. What about getting him his cutie mark?”

“Ah know, let’s get him as soon as he’s done and take him crusadin’ with us before he changed his mind!”

Sweetie pulled and Rarity let her go so the filly could join her friends. “Yeah, we can show him around town and show him the clubhouse before we induct him as our first male member.”

Rarity’s thought slid slightly off topic at the phrasing, but she was brought back when the girls cheered their club name and high hoofed each other. “Well, you have things well planned out. I certainly hope you all have a good time. I’ll prepare some snacks for you before you leave and have your fun.

A chorus of cheering fillies ran around her as she walked with a couple near trips as the fillies darted under her while playing some game or another that she couldn’t be bothered to learn; as long as it didn’t interfere with her progress.

“Girls, please! Talk quieter and stop playing, you may interrupt their bonding time. It’s very important Fluttershy has time to help him relax. It’ll be up to you three to teach him how to adjust and interact while I will offer guidance and direction as a parent should.”

The CMC looked between one another and Sweetie Belle was stopped from speaking by a yellow hoof on her leg and a shaking head. Sweetie exhaled her breath without speaking and took a seat at the table between her friends. “So, how long do you think it’ll be?”

Author's Notes:

There's a little jumping around, but I really can't make this into two chapters, I haven't the mindset to drag it out. I trust you all to fill in the blanks.

Tour and Lunch

Snickers followed Fluttershy down the stairs and pulled his eyes from the mare he’d spent half an hour talking and crying with to gather with the fillies that were waiting for him with grins on their faces, he noticed chewed vegetables between most of their teeth as well.

“Hi-ya, Snickers. Ah packed ya some snacks Rarity made, wanna come along fer a little tour’a the town?”

“I... maybe, what about Fluttershy?”

Scootaloo looked past Sweetie to see the mares talking. “What? Oh, she’s gonna hafta head on out ta get back to work.”

“What? You mean I made her leave work to see me?” He asked in a worried tone and looked at the content mare that walked with Rarity out of the display room and into the kitchen.

“What? Nah, don’t worry, she works with the critters around town. Why, she’s as good with animals as my family is with apples!”

“Or as good as my sister is with dressmaking!”

“Or as awesome as Rainbow Dash is at everything!” Scootaloo hopped into the air and buzzed her wings, slowing her fall to a gentle floating.

The others rolled their eyes while Snickers was tempted to follow Fluttershy with his eyes, then neck, but when he started to walk toward the mares he was blocked by a white blur that solidified into his aunt. “Hey, let’s go out the back. Adults like to talk about boring stuff and we have a lot to show you about our hometown.”

“Yeah, Rainbow’s cloudhouse is the best part, but there’s the school, bakery, candy shop, joke shop, hat shop…”

“While she goes on about all that, let’s actually show you! C’mon, just follow my bow and we’ll tell ya everything ya need ta know!”

“...ster Clover, he runs the… hey, wait for me!”

Snickers winced at the sunlight as he walked out into it, almost covering his eyes with his foreleg, but he knew he’d fall flat on his chest and smack his chin on the ground, which was not something he enjoyed. He saw Apple Bloom turn sharply left and followed her to the other girls who were looking at a map on the ground held between Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle’s forehooves.

“Where’d you get this map? Don’t say it just magically showed up from a flower, please.”

“Hehe, you’re silly, Snickers,” Sweetie giggled and lifted her hoof to cover her mouth, only to gasp and re-flatten the map when her hoof let it go. “No, I got this from Rarity. We drew it with her help while you were with Fluttershy. It’s got the best and most important parts of Ponyville, then it’s got the actual best stuff that Rarity didn’t wanna say but we added.”

He looked at the map and noticed a huge difference between the well practiced calligraphy and artistically drawn two dimensional buildings that were representations of actual places, compared to the crayon drawn boxy shapes that indicated ten times as many places Rarity had mentioned.

He looked at the main spots and sights of town well written including popular local businesses and places everypony could go to socialize or relax. The library, park, town hall, and Sugarcube Corner were most notable. The ones the girls added included green scribbled circles that had partially written words like ‘Rstspot’, ‘chlAx’, ‘Eatnz’, and the best one he squinted at that all the girls noticed.

“What’s that mean?” he asked focusing his attention.

“Only the best place all year round!”

He turned his head left and right, trying to see if one eye would help him read it better. “Chlanbydlak? What the fuck’s that mean?”

The girls hopped back from him while gasping. Scootaloo was the unlucky one because a bug got sucked into her mouth when she gasped. Her friends ran to her side when she pressed her hooves to her throat and started coughing. “Scoots, can ya breathe? How many hairs are in my bangs?”

“We trained for this! We trained for this!” Sweetie hopped between all her hooves in a panic while Apple Bloom asked nonsensical questions, waving a foreleg in front of Scootaloo who was just coughing and struggling to get her earth pony friend off her so she could roll to her belly.

“Scoots, how fast does Rainbow fly? Don’t go inta the light, granny says ya need sunblock if yer in the light too long! Sweetie, she might not make it, should I go get help?!”

“We trained for this!”

“Oh, for fucks sake.” Snickers grumbled and shoved Apple Bloom back with a foreleg and then brought the same leg back quickly and landed a punch on Scootaloo’s arm.

“Auchet!” She coughed and yelped, sending a moth covered with spit into the grass where it was forgotten about. “Why’d you hit me for?”

She was tackled by Sweetie Belle, who was all too happy to have her friend survive such a harrowing experience. Apple Bloom joined in the hug, surrounding Scootaloo with happiness. Snickers looked on with disgust that was shadowed by Scootaloo. “Freakin’ foolers, I knew it,” he snorted.

The trio gasped, this time looking between one another to make sure they weren’t going to die from sudden onset insect inhalation, then glared at Snickers. “Ya know, that’s some bad talk ya got there. Ya don’t wanna get yer mouth washed out, do ya?”

His ears fell at the memory for a few seconds before they turned back and he frowned. “Yeah, bring it on. I’ll eat a fuckin’ bar of soap for dinner tonight, nothin’s gonna stop me from bein’ me.”

There was a door slam and his ears fell, his tail curled around his flank, and he slouched, looking at the door behind him. It wasn’t that door, but the voice that called a farewell from above him perked him right back up. “Hi Snickers, have a good day playing with your friends!”

He smiled as she flew away and then noticed the trio looking at him with smirks. “You have a potty mouth, but you have a crush on Miss Shy, don’t you?”

“What?! No, I don’t have a stupid crush on Fluttershy… and she doesn’t like to be called Miss, so stop it!”

“Ohhh, he does have a crush!”

“No, I don’t!”

They giggled and started to sing. “Snickers and Fluttershy, sittin’ in a tree! Bein’ each other’s special some-po-ny!”

He was about to shout, but it turned into a snort. “What? Seriously, that’s how you sing that?”

They looked at him, still smiling. “Well, we didn’t get ta the part where ya kiss, but if ya’d give us a minute, lover boy.”

He sighed and shook his head, looking the direction to where Fluttershy had flown toward. “Nah, it’s too late. Ya said you were gonna show me around this podunk little ball of hay and dirt, where’s my tour?”

“Hey, it’s way better than Podunk, and there’s way more than hay and dirt.”

“Yeah, there’s mud, too!” Scootaloo added with pride.

Sweetie and Apple Bloom snapped their attention to Scootaloo who was oblivious to their looks, focusing her energy on challenging the new colt in their midst.

“Yeah, no surprise there. Let’s just get goin’, I’m hungry. Got and burgers around here?”

“Oh, yeah! That’s what we forgot to add to the map, let’s go to M and M’s!”

They cheered and made sure he was in their group before happily trotting to the eatery, while he plotted along with them staying more stoic and somewhat anxious.

Several minutes passed full of turns with excited fillies pointing to two different things at a time telling him their own, sometimes shared, experiences at the locations as they went the whole way. Snickers was overwhelmed after nearly a minute, so he shut their rambling out of his mind and thought about his weirdly emotional day.

Crying, whining, being submissive… if I was like that back home I’d be lucky to survive a beating. What’s gotten into me lately? Ever since I got here I’ve been a mess, is it because I’m a kid again?

“Snickers?”

The scream into his ear shocked him from the end of his inner monologue to his very core and he screamed in reply, scrambling from the shrill voice, falling over, then looking at the orange filly with a shit eating grin.

“See, I told you yelling at him would work.”

“Ya didn’t have ta do it that way!”

“Yeah, you really scarred him,” Sweetie reached with a foreleg to help him up.

He took it and once standing he rubbed his ear. “Fuck you,” he hissed, “my ear’s gonna be ringing for an hour.”

He saw a blur of yellow before a sharp pain radiated across his muzzle and spread to a dull throb in a couple heartbeats. “When ya cuss, ya get a swat on the muzzle! That’s what Applejack says and Ah only got it twice before Ah learned my lesson.” she said proudly.

The pain was annoying, but not as bad as many other injuries he’d had. It was like getting slapped; only at the end of his muzzle. He sniffled, glad there wasn’t blood or significant damage done. He was preparing to kick some dirt in her face and give her a line of swears she’d never imagined working together, but stopped when he saw a yellow pegasus fly above.

He noticed it wasn’t Fluttershy, but he’d calmed enough in that instant to regather his wits. “Whatever. Can we get some food, or what?”

“See gals, works like a charm.”

Sweetie glanced at Snickers as she passed while Scootaloo and Apple Bloom followed her, with him following at the end. Once inside he noticed the rustic feel of the building that looked like a rare steak with tables that were literally picnic tables cut into thirds with new legs added. The chairs were benches angled for a pony to sit on while maintaining a natural posture, and it all smelled like greasy food.

“Finally, something kinda normal.”

“Yeah. They have so many things to choose from?! If they don’t have it, you’ll have to go to Canterlot to find it.”

“Yeah! Even Rainbow Dash eats here, like, every couple days!”

“Yeah, mah sis doesn’t eat here, though. But she’s just that way. See, everything here is pony food!”

“Except that part at the far left,” Scootaloo pointed, “there’s some meats on there. Almost nopony eats off there, but there’s a lot of reasons to get something if a diet needs it or the veggies aren’t enchanted right.”

“Wait, you mean you actually eat meat? Like, at this time and place?”

Sweetie smirked. “Well, yeah. Grass and hay don’t give enough energy for higher intelligence to work. How do you think we live on four meals a day instead of eating constantly?”

“Oh, well, I dunno. I just figured it was magic.”

The trio giggled. “We thought you hated magic as an answer, lover boy.”

“Whatever!” He marched in line and looked at the teenage stallion behind the counter. “Got any squirrel?”

“Nope. Chipmunks either. Most of our meats are from oceans and lakes. Only carnivores have to worry about the heavy reds, which aren’t for little kids like you.”

“Well, I want something from a fish that only has two eyes and normal skin. Can you do that for me?”

The girls and clerk looked at him.

“...Would you like fries and a drink with that for three bits extra?”

Snickers grinned while he thought of the meal he was about to get. He was nudged back by Sweetie Belle who placed her order and then led him to a table. He looked at the seat like a dog might look at a lobster, thankfully he learned a lot faster and when Sweetie climbed onto it and sat he was able to copy her.

Barely balancing at first, he planted his forehooves on the table and smiled awkwardly at his tablemate. “Got it on the first try.”

She giggled. “Yeah, but you’re sitting like it’s your first time sitting in a chair. Wait, this isn’t really your first time, is it?” she asked and when he looked away she looked him over. He sat awkwardly, stiffly, and seemed like he was rocking on his thighs just between his flanks rather than resting on his haunches like a normal pony would sit.

He was looking under the table at his dangling hind hooves while she was watching him, thus she didn’t notice when Scootaloo playfully slapped her friend on the back. Sweetie tipped forward enough to land her barrel on the table’s edge as Apple Bloom hopped over the seat and sat with a little scoot to get comfortable. Scootaloo went to the other side of the table, taking a seat close to Snickers.

“So, first time sitting at a table?” she asked with another grin. He looked at her and contemplated huffing through his nose, cleansing it across her face and, more importantly, her perfectly white teeth.

Sweetie answered for him, “Yeah, maybe it is.” She said with obvious inflection that the others nodded to. “So, what’d you order?” she looked at Scootaloo.

“Ah ordered the bean burger supreme with anchovy sauce. Scoots ordered a Hay Burger combo.”

“You know it’s good, don’t deny it.”

Sweetie smirked. “For the biggest fan of the most awesome pony, you sure do eat light.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Just that Rainbow Dash eats like, two burger combo’s a day when she comes by. Twilight goes for three number ones. Applejack sneaks a fish patty when she delivers apple juice. And you eat a junior burger,” her grin grew into a smile, “so, are you trying to fit into a dress for a special colt with a snail on his flank?”

Apple Bloom gasped in surprise and looked from Sweetie to Scootaloo. “Ah knew it! Y’all’re sweet on him! I saw it last week at recess!”

Scootaloo stopped sputtering in shock. “I do not! That’s a rumor and lie! I asked him if I could borrow his eraser, that’s all,” she huffed as a blush grew.

“Sure, Ah know Ah ask ta borrow erasers during recess and not in class, especially when yer best friends sit right near ya.”

“It… I… totally not true,” she crossed her forelegs over her chest and looked away indignantly. The other girls laughed and Snickers looked between them with a small smile.

So, they’re just normal girls. Interesting, most back home would be--

“And, here ya go. Enjoy yer meals,” a mare said blandly and dropped the tray an inch from the tabletop with three empty cups with lids and straws on it before walking away.

Sweetie and Scootaloo took a moment to get drinks while Apple Bloom watched them to make sure she got her favorite drink. Drinks on the table, appetites high and patience low, a silent bell rang and they dug in.

The fillies took to their meals with a gusto that reminded him of others fighting over food, only they were sharing everything off the tray and trading bites between sandwiches. “Hey, aren’t cha gonna eat?”

He reached and took his plate from the tray and looked at the burger with a bite already taken out of it. Some hay fries slid to him from one of the fillies that were numming and humming through their mouths full of food. He took a bite from the bitten spot and he thought his taste buds were exploding. He hummed loudly and swallowed without chewing before giggling and going for another bite, this one taking a quarter of the sandwich.

He didn’t care that the fillies were happily watching him while he chewed and moaned around his food. He didn’t care he was leaning too far back. He didn’t care when he fell onto his back. It was totally worth it to him, and as he rolled to his hooves he stumbled on the cloth covering his hind end and caught himself before he fell over.

He heard the girls go silent before they tittered and quickly whispered to one another. A couple of mares caught his eye when they pointed at him in a way to tell him something, and then he noticed a cold breeze somewhere it shouldn’t have been. He turned and saw something sway under him and, without a thought of what else to do, he turned and leapt at the cloth.

The girls surrounded him and he waited for them to tease and mock him for exposing himself in public. “Alright, nothin’ ta see here. Just a colt that loved his food, go about yer business.”

“Yeah, don’t look at him. It’s uncouth to do that when somepony doesn’t want you to.”

“Right, what they said.”

He opened his eyes to see white legs in front of him. A glance up showed Sweetie Belle’s side and her head facing away. He looked around him at the other two and when he saw they were doing the same he felt a rush of relief. He quickly turned the fabric around, tossed it over his back, secured it with the open pins, and when he stood he slid it back.

His heart was in his throat when he cleared it. “Oh, all fixed up. Good deal, ya still- ugh!”

Sweetie and Scootaloo leaned back when he leapt at Apple Bloom and hugged her. Not one of them was ever expecting that, so while Apple Bloom stood in surprise he just hugged her. The mares at the farther side of the room aww’ed and a few seconds later Sweetie and Scootaloo hugged him, joined finally by Apple Bloom.

“Uh, thanks, Snickers. Why the sudden affection?”

He exhaled a warm breath across her neck that tingled her tail. “You’re the first one to ever stand up for me. I… didn’t know it felt so good to not have to take it.”

“Awwww,” they all cooed and hugged him tighter. They broke the hug when they felt him moving against them. “So, are we good to eat, or should I just eat what’s left?”

“Scoots, ya know ya can’t eat if ya wanna--” Apple Bloom was cut off when Scootaloo leapt at her friend and tackled her starting a short wrestle that ended with the earth pony on top. “As Ah was sayin…”

“Just let it go, AB,” Sweetie interrupted the duo before the manager could reach them, “let’s eat so we can get Snickers to the Sugarcube Corner and then the Clubhouse. We’ve still got a lot to do!”

The wrestlers broke it up and returned to their seats while Snickers reared up and rested his hooves on the table, taking ravenous bites of his burger until it was gone, followed by his hay fries he licked into his mouth with his tongue.

“So, gals, what’re we gettin’ fer dessert?”

“Pie!”

“No, cupcakes!”

“Pie.”

“Cupcakes.”

“Pie!”

“Cut it out, ya two! We’ll decide when we’re walkin’, besides; we’re gettin’ smoothies.”

“Ooo, good idea,” the other two said in unison.

Scootaloo looked at the colt in their group. “What about you, Snickers? Gonna shake it up with us?”

“Shake it up?” he swallowed from his straw some of the sweetest strawberry soda he’d had in his life. “Oh, yeah, sure.” He looked at the messy table with crumbs everywhere, but the food was gone. “We were really hungry, weren’t we?”

“Eeyup, now we’re gettin’ dessert! C’mon, let’s go!”

There was a chorus of approval from the CMC’s and high hooves, then they looked expectantly at Snickers and all motioned to their hooves in the air. He had a rush of a feeling he’d rarely had before and then moved quickly, reaching his hoof up and clacking it with theirs. A shared grin and they all laughed, racing out of the restaurant and towards their next destination.

Tour and Conflict

The trio galloped around ponies and under a couple that shouted their disapproval as they made their way to their next destination. Snickers had finally started to smile, having fun just running and feeling a rush that wasn’t accompanied with fear or anger. There was nothing but joy in the world now, and it surrounded him outside the three fillies guiding their path.

The fresh air was invigorating and his legs hadn’t gotten so much use in a long time. His hooves had been trimmed, too; by a professional not just chipped to a manageable level using whatever he could find. It didn’t hurt when his hooves pounded the ground, the rocks didn’t jab into sensitive cut up frogs, and there was a fresh breeze running through his mane.

The girls took his onto a scenic route at his request to burn off some of the food and sugar he’d taken in, so he could have more desserts. The farmland at the edge of town was sparsely populated and begged to be snacked upon when nopony was looking.

For several minutes it was paradise. Then he ran into Scootaloo and tumbled over her, landing on his side with a thud, sliding across the packed gravel before stopping. His first thought was to shout at her and shove her to prove his point, then he heard something that grated his nerves. “Ha-ha. Nice tumble, blank flanks.

“Maybe you’ll get a cutie mark as a clown, since all you seem to be good at is tumbling into each other.”

The other crusaders reached them, panting. They started to help Scootaloo up and dusted her off. “Go away you two. We’re showing the new colt around town and we’re not gonna listen to your teasing.”

“Did you hear that, Diamond Tiara? The Cutie Mark Lame-saders aren’t gonna listen to us. They’re so far below us they can’t even understand what we’re saying.” The fillies bumped hooves, tittering.

Snickers got up and looked at the scratches across his side.

“And who’s this? A new colt for you fillies to add to your little herd?” Diamond mocked. “Why don’t you come with me, you and I can start one and I’ll actually take care of you; unlike some poor fillies. And I’ll get you a skirt that really shows your assets, because that rag isn’t worth wiping with.”

He snorted and glared.

“Diamond, I don’t think he can understand us either. Maybe if we talk really slow,” Silver said moving closer and sneering. “Are… you… dumb… or… do… you… just… have… low… standards?”

“Girls, stay back,” he said to the CMC.

“Snickers, ya don’t wanna--”

“Snickers?! Ha, his name is meant to be laughed at! Hey Snickers, can I hear a blank flank like you laugh for me? I’ll give you a shiny new bit if you do!”

Silver and Diamond laughed an annoying laugh, ready to end their teasing with their chant. “Bump, bump-”

“Why don’t you go fuck yourselves, then each other in the middle of the market, for a shiny bit?”

They stumbled and nearly fell over, standing quickly and looking at him in shock. “Wh-what?! How dare you--”

“How dare you bitches walk up to me and talk to me like I’m some pussy, ready for a pounding? Do you know what you’re getting yourselves into, talking trash to me? I’ll stomp you so hard you’ll limp for two days! Get the fuck outta here before I open a bottle of kick flank on you!” he reared and stomped his hooves on the ground in challenge.

The duo lowered their bodies getting on guard. “It’s rude to hit a colt, but you’re the rudest colt I’ve ever heard of!” Diamond ran at him followed by Silver, intent on scaring him and making him run away like every other colt they’d ever come across. They didn’t know anything about this one, though.

Quicker than she could react, he leapt at her with a twist and brought his hind leg across her head, dropping her to the ground heavily. He landed dragging his hind hooves behind him just in time to see a startled Silver Spoon begin stopping by dropping her hind end for leverage, only to get an uppercut just below her sternum followed by a shove with his other foreleg sending her to the ground beside her friend.

The CMC screamed and ran to the fight just as he brought a foreleg back and kicked the top of Diamond’s muzzle. “If anypony asks, you tripped when running, got it!” he shouted at the fillies that’d curled up on themselves crying, Diamond covered her muzzle with a pastern while Silver dry heaved between sniffles.

“Snickers! What in Celestia’s name are ya doin’?! Ya can’t fight like that,” Apple Bloom admonished. The other two nodded in agreement with frowns.

“What, they started it. I finished it. Simple as that.”

“Colts don’t fight, Snickers! And who taught you to do that!” Sweetie pointed at the fillies on the ground. He kicked gravel and dirt at them. “Stop that!”

“What? They’re worth less than the ground I kicked at them, they have to belittle us to feel better about themselves. Now they know that if they try that again, I’ll remind them why it’s not safe to gallop on dirt roads. Right?” Diamond barely nodded.

“Snickers, you need to stop! You’re going too far with all this.”

“No, too far is that if these two start shit again. I’ll crawl in their windows at night and beat ‘em half to death,” he snarked back and stood taller.

“No, Snickers. If you do that then you can’t join our club, do you want that?”

He readied a classic smart ass reply, but stopped himself when a warm breeze the smelled of fresh apples blew past him. He stood still, mouth open while he thought, then he closed his mouth and swallowed to wetten his dry throat. He shook his head and exhaled. “I wanna join, but I meant what I said about knocking sense into these two if they do it again.”

They narrowed their eyes at him, but thought it was the best they’d get away from the scene. “Should we get them some help?”

“No way, Sweetie. It may have been wrong, but they had that coming for the past year. I say let them get home and let their butlers patch ‘em up. Us poor ponies have to get some dessert to celebrate this moment with our new colt friend.”

“Scootaloo!” Sweetie slapped her on the foreleg.

“What? Ah! I meant colt friend. Not like boyfriend or special somepony, sheesh. Psh. ‘Guh-ross’.”

Her friends nodded in agreement and gave Snickers the stink eye while walking past him. “You go ahead, I’ve gotta apologize to these two for what I did. It’s the right thing to do, after all.”

They smiled and nodded to each other. “That’s mighty nice of ya. Catch up quick, alright?”

“You bet, heh-heh…” he lifted his tail and grunted, listening to the fillies groan in disgust. When he was done he took a step forward and scraped his hoof along the ground kicking it at them. Diamond rolled away but Silver wasn’t as lucky, finally losing her lunch as firm, still warm road apples landed around her.

“Like I said,” he said softly over his shoulder, “you tripped and you’re not going to tease anypony again. Right?”

Diamond sniffled loudly, hobbling to her friend with a stagger. “Y-yes, sir. We won’t. We promise.”

“Great! I hope we can be friends and put all this mess behind us.” He said happily and took to a gallop to catch up to the girls, who giggled and ran with him back toward town, leaving the terrible duo groaning behind them.

Tour and Dessert

“Well, Ah say it was mighty big of ya to make amends with those two. They might not deserve what they got from ya, but fer a colt ya handled it like a pro.”

“Yeah, those were some pretty cool moves. Where’d you learn that flying spin kick? And then you landed and--”

“Hush about that, Scoots. We don’t wanna let other ponies know what happened.”

“Oh, yeah,” she leaned closer to Snickers, “we’ll talk about it later, okay?”

“There it is! Sugarcube Corner, where the best stuff happens.”

He looked at the building and stopped. The girls made a couple paces before they stopped and rolled their eyes. They turned back and nudged him on by bumping him forward with their bodies. “Hey, q-quit it! Damn… that building looks delicious,” he felt his mouth watering as they got closer. The scent of baked goods called to him, and if he were able he’d float away from the earth and its tether upon him. He’d let his nose follow the scent and lead him to the Nirvana of endless sweetness he smelled.

His ears moved quickly and he realized he was near the building itself. He lost maybe a minute in sensory overload, but now that he was close enough he broke away from his handlers and ran to one of the walls, opened his mouth, and took a bite onto the hard surface. His teeth rattled when he contacted the hard plastic exterior and his heart shattered at the same time he fell flat onto the ground, realization striking him like a baseball bat to the back of his head.

“We tried ta tell ya, but ya were in lala land. It just looks like candy, it ain’t really edible.”

“Yeah, sheesh. Everypony tries that at least once. That’s why the whole thing is made from moulded plastic now.” Scootaloo tapped the wall to show him.

“Exactly, now are we gonna get some treats, or are we gonna have to skip this stop and--”

“No! Apple Bloom, please! Let me in, take me to the yummy stuff,” he sniffled from the ground and looked up at her, reaching for her hooves with his. She stepped back and looked at Sweetie Belle.

“Ugh, fine. Snickers, if you get up and stop acting weird I’ll buy you your own smoothie and a cupcake.”

He hopped to his hooves with a gleam in his eye. “Really? What flavor?” he asked while standing on the tip of his hooves.

Scootaloo leaned in and whispered harshly, “Whatever you want. Let’s just go so you stop embarrassing us.”

“Whatever you say, boss,” he saluted and started walking.

“Wrong way, door’s right over here.”

He slowed, turned in a short arc, and followed Apple Bloom inside. He looked around while following and was pleased the line was short. A blue mare with her mane done to look like icing was taking a stallion’s order when they got in line. “Snickers, ya like bananas? Carrots? Berries?”

“Yes!” he answered readily.

She shook her head in good nature and spent a moment talking with her friends while he looked around the room. It was a nice bakery, ponies sat at some tables set against the wall, but it seemed like most of the business was to go. He looked at the walls and cocked his head at the fresh baked goods just sitting out in the open air, then his eye caught something and he looked. There wasn’t anything, but he still felt like he wanted to stay close to the girls.

That was when he was scooped up from behind and the smooth outer wall of a hoof rubbed through his mane and against his scalp. “Hey, who’s this little guy?! Girls, is he your new friend? Gasp! Is he new to Ponyville?! Where’s the rest of his family? I have planning to do and,” Pinkie looked behind her at the fillies and noticed their quick and intense ‘stop it’ motions.

“Oh, he doesn’t like to be picked up! I get it,” she said dropping him and resuming where she stopped. “I have to know how many to plan for. Is it a herd of a few, on only one and two? Maybe there are three plus a little baby!”

She dodged the swing he swung at her by leaning back. “Shut up!”

“Gasp, again! That’s no way to talk to your new friend. Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie.”

He glared at her. “You’re trouble. I don’t want anything to do with you or your weird head.”

“Wow, for a colt you sure are feisty. Girls, I know how to fix this problem.” She dodged a spinning kick and held a cupcake to him. “Have a cupcake!” she reached behind his head and tugged his mane. His mouth opened almost automatically and she stuffed it in, closed his jaw, then moved it up and down for him.

He shrugged her off with a flailing of her limbs and she just grinned at him with a familiar, terrifying smile that would haunt his dreams. That moment was also when he moved his tongue across the baked amazingness in his mouth. The taste was divine and, once again, he giggled while falling over. This time he didn’t expose himself, he wasn’t even affected the same way, but he made for an awkward, yet positive sight.

“Thif, if da beft fing Ah’ve evow tafe’ted.”

“There’s more where that came from! What’s your name, new bestest friend?”

He moaned quietly while getting back up, so Sweetie Answered. “He’s Snickers, he’s from far away; but if you wanna know more you’ll have to talk with Rarity because she said only adults need to know about these things, but I know I’m adult enough to know the difference, but she won’t tell me anything because…” she stopped when she noticed Pinkie wasn’t there. A clatter of metal pots and pans broke the serenity of the moment, then Pinkie ran out of the kitchen and to the foals.

“Here you are! Three smoothies, a muffin, and a cupcake,” Pinkie said gleefully, “enjoy! I’ve got some serious partying to do.”

Snickers finally gathered his wits and looked at her. “You’re gonna party and not invite us? Rude.”

“What? Me, rude?” Pinkie pointed to herself and grinned manically. “Never, my little pony. This is a party everypony will be dying to attend.” He leaned back and slid under the table, curling around his tail and petting it. “What got into him?” Pinkie asked, shrugged, then hopped away humming a happy tune.

“Hey, ya doin’ okay?”

“Pink monster… those eyes, always watching. So many eyes, always watching, never blinking, never a moment alone.”

Apple Bloom looked above the table at her friends and the all sagged in defeat, slipping under the table with him. “There, now. Ya don’t have ta worry, she’s just really happy.”

“And she likes to make others smile and have fun, too! Right, Scoots?”

Scootaloo tapped her chin and looked at some gum wadded under the table. “Well, it was kinda weird how she kinda got a red haze behind her, her eyes seemed like portals into the darkest depths, and her voice took on that vibrating deep tone when she talked to him about ponies dying… but other than that, she’s pretty cool, Snickers. Get over it and join us up top,” she placed her forehooves on the cushion and was yanked back down by her tail.

“Hey, watch my tail, it’s sensitive, Apple Bloom.”

Apple Bloom whispered harshly. “Ya gotta head harder than a cider barrel if ya think yer helpin’, look at what ya did to him.” Looking down, Scootaloo grimaced at the colt that was sucking his hoof and whining. “He doesn’t like Pinkie yet, so help us get him outta here. We’ll take our drinks ta go.”

Scootaloo raised a forehoof, paused, then nodded. “Got it. Hey, Pinkie?!”

“Who needs some to go cups?” Pinkie asked, appearing from beneath the bench Scootaloo and Sweetie were sitting on. A loud yelp from Snickers was all the warning they got before he gasped and fell to his side.

“Snickers?! Is he dead? What do we do?”

“Everypony, stay calm… we trained for this. We trained for this!”

Pinkie lifted the table and watched two fillies panicking over the colt while Sweetie sat in place chanting a steady mantra. “Wow, if this is a ritual sacrifice for to go cups, you’re going about it all wrong! Where’s the glyph calling to the dark god of syrups, or to the emperor of the coldest realm, Hag’n Da’as; ruler of all that is sweet, cold, and creamy?

“Silly fillies, he just passed out from terror brought on certainly by unknown means unrelated to anything, anypony, or anyone in our universe and timeline could ever understand,” she slid Snickers from the floor onto her back and gestured for the fillies to follow her.

“Wh-where’re ya takin’ us? Is he gonna be okay? Do we have ta call some emperor from another dimension ta help us, really?”

“Psh, no! Only if you want the best to go cups filled with the most amazing ice cream ever! This colt just needs some warm air and this single ice cube.” Pinkie pulled an ice cube from under her leg and held it, steaming in the sunlight. She turned him to the side and blocked the view of what she was doing, but they could still see his face.

Their worry grew with each passing second until his eyes opened and he screamed in a very adult way that sounded nothing like a filly running from a bee toward her friends.

“What the fucking shit is your problem you walking pink fart factory?! Who the hell shoves anything there! Ugh, I feel sick; it’s still cold! Owie, owie! Get it out!” he screamed between swearing and sat down, scooting on his rear. “No, don’t you fucking come near me! I need a toilet! Luna, face fuck me for all the wrongs I’ve done! Just get me away from her,” he turned and ran away leaving dozens of ponies gawking as he ran.

Most eyes turned back to Pinkie, who would turn more pink if she could have after that. “I… did not expect that reaction. Here you go, girls. Don’t use that language, I’ve gotta wash my ears out with hot water and an extra foamy bubble bath,” she said flatly and walked backwards into a bush.

The CMC watched him turn a corner, then looked back at the unmoving bush, then to one another. “Ugggh, do we have to get him? He’s more trouble than anything in the history of ever.”

“Yes, Scootaloo, we do! He’s part of my family now, and think about it; what would you do if Pinkie put an ice cube in your back there place?” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo inhaled sharply and clenched, dropping their tails to hide themselves. “Exactly.”

“Okay, you don’t have ta be so graphic. That’s some mighty bad imagery ya gave us just now.”

“There’s a lotta things I’d do, but putting ice in there isn’t one of them.”

The other two looked at Scootaloo, who blushed. “C’mon, let’s go find him before he starts more trouble that can be traced back to us.”

Taking the lead, and a smoothie in her foreleg, Scootaloo walked on three legs in the direction he went while sipping her fruity goodness. “Ah wonder… if he doesn’t drink his smoothie, maybe we could share it?”

“No way, Apple Bloom! That’s my nephew’s and I won’t let you drink it if you’re thinking about it. He needs all the food he can get so he grows up big and strong.”

“I thought he was your brother?”

“Nuh-uh. I thought he was her cousin.”

Sweetie sipped her drink and shook her head. “No, see; Rarity adopted him…”

A Scolded Rarity

“Rarity, I don’t want to sound mean… but how you handled Snickers earlier was certainly uncalled for.”

Rarity sighed while walking to the stove. “Would you like some tea, darling?”

“Oh, no thank you. I only have a moment before I must go. But, a foal with his problems shouldn’t have to be subjected to what you’ve done to him already.”

“Is this because of that male stereotype from forever ago?”

Fluttershy scuffed a hoof on the linoleum. “No, it’s not only because he’s a colt. Any child shouldn’t have their mouths soaped to the extent you went to.”

“But Fluttershy, he was being positively crude and just… just dreadful! His choice of language is set to profane, and--”

“Rarity!” Fluttershy’s voice silenced Rarity. “I… don’t… care! You’re… I’m sorry, Rarity, but you’re just a bully to him! Ever since you met him you’ve been just a very… not nice pony, haven’t you?”

“W… you see, I believe I’ve been quite cordial with him, if I must say so,” she flipped her mane and looked at Fluttershy, meeting her eyes and wilting under her intense gaze.

“Tell me if this is true, Rarity,” Fluttershy asked sternly, “you left him alone for hours when he first got here to work?”

“Yes, but I was behind on my--”

“You soaped him until he vomited?” Fluttershy asked with a sterner voice.

“Only because he said I was preparing to--”

“How did you introduce him to me?”

“He was going to mount my sister like a--”

“Be quiet! Rarity...” Fluttershy said in a deeper voice than she’d ever used around ponies, “you’re the biggest meanie that poor little colt has met since he got to this land from wherever he’s from, he told me when he was crying like I’ve never seen a pony his age cry. I have to put this in my report and… I just… can’t see you right now, Rarity. I’m sorry!”

She turned and ran away from the stunned white mare fast enough to leave her hair flowing behind her. She opened the door and leapt into the air, flying away just in time to see the CMC and Snickers looking at a map. For a moment she forgot about all the pain he was holding in and hiding and only saw three friends starting a new adventure.

…

Rarity stood in the kitchen, tall and still for several seconds before she stomped a hoof on the floor. “Why that traitorous little… ugh! She has no idea what it’s like to manage a large number of clients, take care of their needs, and supply them at their demand while giving yourself completely to their needs! Why can’t she understand that taking care of my little sister is a full time job itself?

“With having to find her and her friends things to do, clean her from her unsupervised galavanting, giving her group bits so they can…” she trailed off as things fell into place in her mind. Fluttershy’s honesty finally filtered through her pride, washing away her charm and charisma to the point that if she were Pinkie her mane and tail would have fallen flat.

“If a customer came in right now… I don’t even know,” she called a fainting couch to herself and lay on it. Next a bucket of ice cream left the freezer with a spoon from a nearby drawer joined her and she began eating loudly, nomming with each heaping spoonful.

“…Ngyum, ngumm, omnong… oh, what shall I do?” she lay back and draped her foreleg across her forehead. “Motherhood, the one thing I haven’t prepared for in all my years of dress making. Whom shall I seek to find mentoring in this new venture I find myself in? Ngummm, nom, nom.”

She pondered between bites of ice cream for several minutes, thinking of who to talk with, nomming loudly and posing dramatically when she got ice cream headaches.

“Ha! Idea, the Cakes have foals. They have to know everything there is to know about rearing them, not to mention Pinkie Pie. No, wait. Sweetie and her friends are going there and I don’t know when. Who else? Hmm… Well, the pickings are indeed slim, but Granny Smith has more than enough experience.

“I’ll ask her once I’m done wallowing in shame for all the wrongs I’ve done today thus far. No more, ngyum-nom… shall I be a poor mother figure. From this moment on, I, Rarity, will be the best mother, ever! After this bucket...”

…

Rarity made her wait to the Apple’s farm, passing a disgusting scene that was clearly from a drunkard staggering around. She made a point to tell the town constable about a mare smelling of vomit that had defecated during her walk of shame. Refusing to have her magic sullied with the waste of another pony, she instead stood back a ways and used her magic to shove a whole portion of the path into the grass.

“There, now nopony has to worry about seeing such a nasty thing in the walkways. How can anypony just do that so seemingly casually? Bleh.”

Walking carefully for a while, checking ahead of her path to avoid stepping in something she’d regret for days, Rarity finally noticed the fence marking the Apple’s land. Fruit trees extended far beyond what she could see, so she ignored that and instead made the usual trek to the entrance of the acres.

Seeing a more traditional farm to her left as she passed, Rarity wondered how the vegetables were coming along. It was only a couple months until the Harvest, followed by Nightmare Night. Something she knew she could do was dress Snickers in an outfit befitting his unique personality.

“Oh, hello, Miss Smith. Do you have a moment to talk?”

“Eh, yeah. Ah guess so… once, when Ah was a young mare, there was a stallion what’d come by the farm every couple moons. He was sellin’ some fancy floor polish, ya see. Now, we didn’t have a need fer no sweet smellin’ floor cleaner when elbuh grease and water’d work just fine ‘n dandy.

“Pa, he went’n told’m ta take his snake oil ta somepony else. Never did see that feller again, but ta this day, Ah wonder if that stuff would’a worked and saved me hours on my knees. Now, that’s a story! When Ah was younger than you are now--”

“Yes, thank you for the riveting story, however I was hoping you could tell me how to be a great mother, just like you.”

A second passed, then another. “Ah must have a pea stuck in mah ear. What’d ya say?” she asked tilting her head and tapping her temples while working her jaw.

“I was hoping to speak with you about something important, about how to be a mother.”
Granny’s ears perked three quarters of the way up. “I recently adopted a colt and must parent him in a more effective way. How do you do it, and to keep it going once its started.”

“Uh, yer not makin’ much sense at all. Ya wanna be a mother to a foster ya just, what, found on the way home?”

“Oh, certainly not,” Rarity giggled, “he’s an orphan from some sort of accident, we presume. We’ve gone through the EFS, as is the right way to go. He was actually given to me, since many other adults are quite busy with their own tasks with foals of their own.”

“Oh, Ah get ya. So, ngyahh,” Granny groaned in thought, “what’s eaten yer ernges, exactly?”

“I’m inexpericend actually parenting and was wondering if you could tell me the secret on how you’ve done it so well.”

The old mare looked at Rarity, then laughed for at least eight seconds. “Well, if’n that ain’t the funniest dern thing Ah heard in a zap apple’s age. Filly, there ain’t no secret ta doin’ what a mother needs ta do. Ya just love’m, set gentle rules, and listen to ‘em. Now, don’t go takin’ that literally, ya hear,” she narrowed her eyes at Rarity. “The last thing a foal yer talkin’ about needs is a strict life er a mother hoverin’ over him like a storm cloud waitin’ and watchin’.

“What ya gotta do is this, ask yerself what you’d want done to ya if ya were in their place. And that don’t mean give’m cookies ‘n cream everytime they do somethin’, neither! Ya gotta ask yerself the question fer real. If Apple Bloom breaks a cup, ya think I’m gonna tan her hide with a switch or give her some jam?

“No! Ah ain’t doin’ a thing but askin’ her why and havin’ her clean it up. If she’s a party ta cuttin’ down a neighbor’s tree, what d’ya think I’d do?” she asked.

“Well, perhaps again sit her down and ask her why, then punish her accordingly.”

“What’s yer meanin’? What’d you do if that colt ‘a yers cuts down a tree?”

“Well,” she thought it over and tapped her chin. “I supposed I’d ask why, then ground him for the rest of the week without dessert.”

“Mare, that’s durn foolish. Ya think yer gonna stop a young’n from eatin’ sweets just cuz ya said so? Even if ya lock’m in his room he’s got friends by now that’d sneak him candy and cakes. If ya wanna play it soft, ya find a way ta bring it outside and then confront him, but don’t be yellin’ ta the town about what he did.

“Ya tell him why it’s wrong and the harm it does to the neighbors. Bein’ outside just makes it so he gets seen bein’ scolded, even if ponies don’t know why,” she rocked in her chair some, “the point is ta let them think other ponies are disappointed in them, not you. You just tell’m the facts that the tree won’t give shade on the hot days anymore.

“The foals that go to visit won’t have a place ta rest if it was their favorite spot. The tree could’a been from their parents, somethin’ they planted when they was born. Ain’t no reason ta go tannin’ hides or makin’ them shout back when they don’t have a durn good reason, ya hear?”

Rarity nodded enthusiastically. “I do! Thank you, Granny. I appreciate what you’ve told me more than you can know.”

“Heh, just doin’ what a good parent would do, ya know.”

Rarity smiled at the grinning mare and took her leave with a basket of various Apple family treats forced upon her.

I do believe a new mare will greet that little colt and everything will turn for the better in no time.

A Moment by a River

The girls found Snickers in the small river that led through the outskirts of Sweet Apple Acres through the west orchards sitting and scowling at his reflection in the crystal clear water. He didn’t look up, but his ears told them he’d heard them approach. “Heya, Snickers. Ya found my family farm, what’d’ya think?”

He raised a hoof and splashed it into the water, scattering his image and turning his back to them. Sweetie Belle ran into the water and moved to his front and raised a hoof to her lips. She moved to hug him but stopped at his out stretched leg. The others approached, Scootaloo setting his melted drink in the grass before she joined them.

Scootloo groaned quietly when she reached her friends. “What now?” She looked at him and rolled her eyes. “Why’re you crying? You got away from Pinkie and made everypony look like idiots.”

She stood and splashed water at her. “Shut it! You don’t know what it’s like,” she wiped his eyes with his leg, “you’ve never been hurt like that. You’ve never had to fight every day for food or to not die! I get to this place and day fucking one I’m in a Tartarus like I thought I’d left behind me,” he grimaced and sat down in the water again.

“Don’t waste your time with me, I’m a lost cause no matter what. Just… go live your lives and build a future your friends can live and die in.”

“Hey, you don’t have to be a jerk about everything. It’s your fault you got your self into whatever you’ve--” he leapt at her, missing her by a second with a quick pegasi dodge.

“Shut… up!” He screamed loud enough to send nearby fruit bats into the sky and his voice to echo. He seethed at her and she stumbled back with a primal fear of being attacked by a stallion three times his size. “You don’t know what it’s like to live in hell, you never will,” he didn’t hold back his tears as they melted into the water they all stood in.

“Snickers,” Apple Bloom said quietly, “please, ya can tell us and get it off yer chest. Ah promise, we might not understand it all, but we’ll be here fer you the whole way.”

“Yeah, I Pinkie Promise that no matter what, I’ll try to love you even more. We’re family, we have to take care of each other, right?”

He took a step back and whined, looking between the two fillies before moving to them quickly and wrapping a leg around each, crying freely. “I… you’re so kind to me, why? How can you be so nice and do what you do?”

They hugged him back, Scootaloo watched from beside them and stayed back.

“We’re just us, nothin’ can change a pony as long as we’re true to ourselves.”
A few minutes later and they sat in the grass, their coats nearly dry and Snickers sucked his melted but slightly chilled drink in their silence. “Well, I guess I can tell you some of my story… but you have to keep it between us.” They all promised, Scootaloo staying quiet through the words and sluggish through the motions.

“I worked as what’s called an electrical engineer back home. It was a different place and the words I use don’t translate into Ponish, so they’re meaningless until they’re discovered later, I guess. My home was a horrible place where every day was a fight for survival if one wasn’t employed by a major power.

“There were a few, but honestly they all fought over resources more than anything else. I was lucky to not have to do that crap too often, but no job was permanent or stationary. I’d have to travel with trained soldiers and scavenge for supplies to trade to food to eat, only they got rations regularly.

“There were times I’d be captured by a gang and ransomed off,” he sniffled and looked into the distance beyond time into his past, “sometimes I’d be sold, sometimes I’d run away. There were always fights over who’d have me next and the males would be tame compared to the females when I was picked.”

Sweetie raised her foreleg. “What’s that mean? They sound like they were bullies, were they just picking on ya for being a colt?”

He chuckled and shook his head. “I was an adult, and it wasn’t as tame as being picked on. I don’t know exactly, but I must have a dozen kids back home from what they forced me to do.”

“Kids? Well, if ya think ya were a grown up, what’d they do ta give ya kids? Were ya a foalsitter?”

“Holy shit, you’re so damned innocent, aren’t you?”

They all frowned. “Why do you have to use so many bad words? You know it’s not what nice ponies say,” Scootaloo spoke up.

“Well, being an adult I can say whatever I want. Being a kid just means I have to say them less,” he shrugged and sipped his drink again.

“Well, can ya not use any? Ah mean, yer nice enough, but all that cussin’ ain’t gonna do anythin’ but bring us trouble. Same fer fightin’, callin’ ponies names, and the like.”

“Well, I guess I can cut back, but it’s been part of my vocabulary and verbiage my whole life.”

“Whatever, girls. Let’s take what we can get and he can explain foalsitting for his scavengers, or whatever.”

“It was rape, you fucking twit. You’ve never had a stallion hold you down while another pounds you from behind, it’s worse than an ice cube shoved back there and hurts for days!

“Snickers, yer cussin’ still!”

“Do you listen to anyone before you talk or should you check in for a routine euthanizing?!”

“Woah, Snickers! We just talked about--”

“I’ll schedule you one, you fuckwit, if you keep talking to me like that.”

“Snickers,” Sweetie shouted and her voice cracked getting her to cough a little, “you stop talking like that to our friend or I’ll do something really bad to you!”

He looked away from them and back to his drink, then tossed it into the river. “I don’t care. I’m not saying another word if she’s gonna be here,” he pointed in Scootaloo’s general direction. Scootaloo stood and shouted her dislike of him, running off and leaving them alone.

“You don’t have to be that way, you know.”

He looked at his aunt and pouted. “She doesn’t know what anything is like. She, all of you, this whole fucking place is paradise and I’ve still found the worst parts of it all.”

Sweetie scooted closer to him and placed her forehooves between her legs on the ground, looking at him. “You know, I know what the things you’re talking about mean. Rape and having kids, and all that.”

“Ah do, too. Ya see, it’s part of schoolin’. When we start goin’ inta estrus in a couple years, we have ta be ready and know the tells. Some stallions, they ain’t gonna take it kindly if we refuse ‘em, so we gotta know what ta say.”

Sweetie nodded. “If any pony calls rape, every pony nearby is gonna come running to stop it. It’s a word everypony knows, because it’s the worst thing one pony can do to another. Force a foal onto a filly or mare isn’t okay.”

“Exactly, so whoever did that stuff to ya back home, they’d get stomped and bucked if they’d been caught and probably spend years in the dungeons.”

“Or get gelded and put to hard labor,” Sweetie added in nervously. “It’s a horrible thing to think about, since everything colts and stallions have had to go through since the day of a Thousand Sorrows, but some males can’t be reasoned with.”

“What’s that day you keep talking about? I’ve never heard of it.”

“Oh… Apple Bloom, do you wanna tell him?” The filly shook her head. “Okay, well… I’m not okay telling the story because I don’t know it good enough, but maybe Miss Cherilee can tell you someday.”

“Oh, or Granny Smith! She knows just about everything about everything,” Apple Bloom said proudly.

“Well, how about we show him the clubhouse before anything else. Maybe,” Sweetie Belle stood and looked at Snickers, “somepony’s can exchange apologies and start fresh?”

He snorted and stood up, his emotions conveying regret. “I guess I can. I have to get my anger under control, I know that. Maybe I can get some drugs to help me balance out.”

Apple Bloom nickered. “No way, we’ll find a way ta help ya, but ya ain’t gettin’ any drugs if Ah have anythin’ ta say about it.”

“Sure, like you’re gonna stop me,” he smiled and challenged her.

“Ah think Ah can, all Ah have ta do is tattle on ya and Granny’ll have a posse get ya to the hospital in no time.”

He shuddered. “How about I just keep my nose clean and blood pure on this one?”

“Now that, is a plan I like.”

“Me, too, Sweetie. Race ya to the clubhouse?”

“On three,” Sweetie looked back to make sure he was going to run with them. “One, two…” she dashed off ahead of them and they shouted ‘cheater’, following as closely as they could.

Clubhouse

The group sans Scootaloo reached the ramp and stopped, catching their breath with a jug of water they kept outside for just that reason, drinking it by taking turns they got enough to sate their thirst while their breath calmed and their hearts slowed. “Ah see Scoots made it, so ya ready ta say yer sorry?”

“How do you know she’s here? She could be back at her home or something crying under her bed cuz I’m,” he sighed and shook his head, “I’m just mean to her and I shouldn’t be; regardless of how I feel.”

Sweetie placed a hand on his side. “It’s okay, we’re a team and no matter what we’re family, too. As long as you don’t go all crazy again, you’ll be fine and we’ll support you.”

“Heh, crazy. You have no idea what that means,” he gave a sardonic smile and looked at the closed door. “Well, I’m not getting any younger,” he looked at his foreleg, “again. Let’s do this.” He took the lead and the girls followed closely until he reached the door. “Do I just go in, or what?”

Apple Bloom opened the door and they peeked in to see Scootaloo wrapped in a length of cloth, struggling to get out of it. Paint and brushes lay on the floor matching his coat and mane colors. “Scootaloo, what in tarnation are ya doin’?” Apple Bloom asked when they walked in, she and her fellow crusader helping the filly to unwrap herself.

“I was hanging a banner I made… but,” she looked at herself and pouted, “I tripped off the stool and tried to catch myself on the banner and it came down and then I got all wrapped up. Thanks, girls,” she said looking at the banner they were holding open and looking at. “Awe, darn… I’m sorry, Snickers, it’s supposed to say ‘Welcome to the Club’, but the paint got a smeared.

“It’s supposed to be a joke about being in our club, our clubhouse, and the first male CMC, but I messed it all up.”

“No, no! It’s fine, Scootaloo… I’m sorry, too,” Snickers pawed at the floor and couldn’t look at her, ears down and his posture slumping. “I was just mad, when I was grown up I went through a lot and yelling and cussin’,” he glanced aside to Apple Bloom, “was how I always talked to everyone.

“I didn’t mean what I said, well, not all of it… I didn’t want you there when I was talking near the end because I felt like I’d make it worse and blame you. Can we forgive each other?”

He looked up into the grinning face of Scootaloo. “Why would you think I’d stay mad at you? You’re our nephew, we can’t be mad at you for that long!”

“Wait, all of you?” he looked at the fillies standing side by side.

“Eeyup. We’re not sisters by blood, but we’re sisters none the less. Yer one of us now, Snickers!”

“Wait! First we have to swear him in, you know the rules.”

He narrowed his eyes at Scootaloo. “You said I can’t swear, but you’re gonna?”

They fillies laughed at him. “No, silly. We’re gonna induce… instruct…” Sweetie tried for the word.

“Induct?”

“Yeah, that! Thanks, Apple Bloom. We’re gonna do that to make you a part of us. C’mon, Scootaloo! Let’s get the scroll.”

“That was the longest list of terms for acquaintance I’ve ever heard. Did you just open a thesaurus and go to town copying it?”

“It was Scootaloo that wrote it, ask her.”

“Hey! I wanted to be thorough. There’s no reason to skip on a way to say friend when it’s the most important part of what we represent. Second is getting a cutie mark!”

The four moved together and clacked hooves. “Cutie Mark Crusaders, forever!”

He laughed with them, delighted in the innocence of the moment. A loud series of knocks startled them. “Who the hay could that be?”

“I dunno, check it out, Apple Bloom.”

Apple Bloom looked at Scootaloo with frustration. “Ya know, all the times ya tell me ta do stuff, ya could just do it and not tell me.”

“Or, by the time you get done talking to me you could have done it already.”

“Says you!”

The door opened and an explosion rocked the room, confetti and streamers covering the room. Pinkie hopped over Snickers and set a cake on the table against the wall. “Okay, so I have a lot to apologize for and I’m gonna do it the right way! I talked with Gummy and he helped me see the error of my ways. First, no more ice to wake a pony up, ever again. Next,” she looked at the colt, backing out of the door. He turned and tried to run, getting picked up carried back in and placed onto a chair with a conical hat on his head. “Next, I have a gift for you, Snickers,” she held a plain white box for him.

Hesitantly with trembling legs, he reached for it and brought it to his lap, then flipped the lid open, flinching like a bomb was about to go off. He looked at a small booklet and then to Pinkie. “It’s a Pinkie Pie Promise Pocket Packet, patent pending. There are five cards that let you do one of the things on each of them.

“You can even use the last one for anything you want and I’ll do it no matter what, as long as it doesn’t hurt anypony, make anypony sad, or violate Turning Test’s three laws of automations and golems. Let’s see, law one is--”

“I know the laws, Pinkie,” he said sternly and picked up the booklet. He opened to the first page. “One free party for anything you choose,” he looked at the next. “One free back rub?”

“Or scratch, or wash, or you can switch it up and use it on me! I give great rides,” she beamed.

“I don’t doubt that,” he looked at her cutie mark and she Pinkie blushed. “Let’s see, one hour with Auntie Pinkie Pie?” He looked at Sweetie.

“Nope! She’s not really your aunt, it’s just a name she uses.”

“Yeah, who better to help you with a problem than the aunt you love bestest?! I’ll be there for you whenever you need me as soon as I get the card. The hour part is more of a guideline than a rule.”

“Okay… lastly, one wire diagram? What the hay’s that mean?”

“You’ll know when you need it, that one is conditional. Maybe you won’t need it, I don’t know, really. It’s just something Gummy told me to put in. And the last one is all yours! Anything you want… but you should save it. I think you might need it someday, and it’ll mean more that way.”

He put the booklet in the box and thanked her. “So, do I have to use the first one to eat some cake?” he asked. Pinkied pulled a very sharp knife from seemingly no where and in a single motion cut a piece out, slid it onto a plate that wasn’t there when he’d looked away, and then she pressed the plate into his chest.

“No way! First party’s free, I brought a friend and I hope you’ll get along,” Pinkie said looking at the door. She giggled and looked up. “Gummy, how’d you get up there?” she took the alligator from her head and nuzzled him. “This’ Gummy, he’s a great listener.”

She put him on the table next to a small slice of cake that Snickers noted couldn’t have been there a second ago since he was watching Pinkie… who didn’t have an alligator on her head or body at all when she gave him his cake.

He looked at her with disdain at how she defied logic, relaxing when Sweetie poked his side. “Don’t ask about her, just enjoy the party. You’ll go crazy if you try to figure out how she does stuff.”

“I can imagine,” he said and took a bite of cake. His moan got everyone’s attention, alligator included. “Oh, fweet Fweftia’s teefts,” he said spitting crumbs. He got to all fours and put the plate on the floor, taking bites until his cheeks bulged. He looked at Pinkie with unbridled joy and mumbled words through his full mouth, chewing as he went.

The room was filled with jovial laughter and music started to play from the back of the room. “I know, isn’t it the best cake you’ve ever had? I made it with all the freshest and bestest ingredients just for you, Snickers. It’s my way of saying the party is called the ‘I’m sorry for scaring you and then sticking an ice cube up your butt because it wasn’t as funny as I thought it was gonna be and I felt really bad and cried for a little while but then--”

“Pinkie,” he said feeling giddy and grinning at her with cake in his teeth, “I forgive you. That’s the best cake I’ve ever had in my life and as long as you don’t show me your teeth when you smile for a while, I think I can be your friend, too.”

He hugged her and the fillies, who’d just started to dance, stopped and aww’ed at the scene. Pinkie was about to bounce around the room in happiness, but held back. “Thanks, Snickers. I can’t wait to introduce you to the other foals around town!”

“Uh, not yet. First cake, then I gotta get home. Rarity’s gonna bitch me out, I bet,” he let Pinkie go and noticed a new slice of cake on the plate, Gummy holding the handle of the knife in his mouth to the colt’s surprise. He took the cake slice and backed away, noticing the plate he’d eaten off before was gone and his cake was on a new clean plate.

“Now, that’s the last straw, Snickers,” Sweetie went to him and poked him with her hoof. “You, young colt, are getting a swear jar. Everytime you say a bad word, you put in a bit or have to do a chore for your auntie.”

“Fine, I can get used to that. I should swear less, anyway; not very nice of me to do it, is it?”

“Nope,” the room chorused and laughed again, breaking apart.

So, we’ve got fillies dancing like nopony was watching, me gobbling cake like a Prench prostitute earns her rent, and a mare that’s bouncing around the room like cocaine was part of a healthy breakfast. Snickers giggled to himself. I can get used to this.

Returning Home

Author's Notes:

Returning home: In which Snickers goes back to the place he came from and the story ends abruptly leaving no resolution, dozens of unanswered questions, and hundreds of unhappy readers!

Oh, wait... that's just the title of the chapter. My bad!

Read on.

The sun was nearing the mountains and the CMC were finally walking back into town after saying goodbye to Apple Bloom, promising to meet her family the next day. Pinkie promised to clean up after the hour long party and with energy to burn, the CMC played around the clubhouse until supper was called for the Apple clan.

“Well, nephew, what’d you think of your first day in Ponyville?” He glanced at Sweetie and grumbled. “What was that?”

“I said until I left Rarity’s, it was sucky.”

“Hey, my sister…” she stopped when he held a hoof to stop her.

“You and the other CMC are the best thing to happen to me in a long time, and that means more to me than I can say. I’ve been a jerk off, but you’ve been so kind and you’ve cared about me more today than I’ve gotten in the last few years with nothing in trade.” He flinched and looked to his left and right at the fillies that had pressed their sides to his. His cheeks warmed when they nuzzled his neck at the same time and he really wanted to make sure his skirt, if it could be called that, was forward enough; just in case.

“You’re so sweet, Snickers! Why can’t you always be this way?” Sweetie asked and Scootaloo stepped away.

“You do like him, don’t you?” she teased and got a raspberry from them both. “Oh, here’s my house! I’ll see you later, and Sweetie,” she pointed at the colt, “get that jar set up quick, I can use a new scooter!” She laughed and ran into a nice looking house.

“Why’s everypony got a house and I gotta live in a purple covered cage?”

“It’s not just you, Rarity’s my sister and I have to stay with her a lot. I just don’t actually stay there enough to really think about it.”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense. Since I met you and we left, I haven’t even thought of that place. I guess it’s home now. Weird to think about, ya know?”

“What, Rarity’s boutique being your home?”

“Home at all. I can see you don’t really believe me when I say I was a grown up, but home wasn’t a thing; it was an idea. Something almost everypony wanted and reached for, but always knew it was out of reach.

“Sure, we’d build towns or try to hide away and make a life with those we had. Home on the road… but statistically a family was safest as a couple of adults with no kids or family with them. Most of the time they’d be the only ones left from their family’s, others got split up and would never see each other again. Towns made of scrap still burn, cities made from metal weigh on ponies’ backs being bigger targets for better supplies,” he looked at Sweetie and she was watching her legs move, listening to him. “For me, and a bunch of survivors, we were special and got lucky. We learned science and engineering, we were going to help build a better future.

“Then we were attacked from within, scattered to the wastes we weren’t ready for,” he looked up and saw the purple monstrousity. “I guess you get what I’m saying, right?”

“Yeah, it’s just so sad… where you’re from, can’t anything be done to make it better?”

He smirked and looked around the town. “I hope that’s the reason I’m here. There’s a saying about a butterfly’s wings--”

“Snickers, darling! There you are,” he was lifted in blue magic and brought quickly into Rarity’s embrace against his will. “I have so much to talk to you about,” he struggled and pressed his forehooves against her neck, “I’ve made you an outfit that you’ll just adore!”

“Get off me you clingy cunt!”

“Snickers!” Sweetie shouted and looked around at the last lingering ponies nearby that gaped at the scene.

“No, it’s fine, Sweetie. He’s perfectly within his rights. Snickers,” Rarity set him down and kneeled as though she were bowing to him, “I truly apologize for marehandling you like that. I hope you can forgive me, I was out of line.”

He looked at her and when she lowered her head in supplicance, showing her horn in the most submissive way a unicorn could, he prepared himself to smack her magical appendage, but stopped himself before he could raise his hoof. He took a step back and looked at her, realizing she was actually apologizing using proper technique.

He looked to Sweetie who was slack jawed, eyes on her sister. He looked back at his new mother and shook his head slightly, then turned and ran past her and into the house.

Rarity stood and watched him go, puzzled until her sister spoke up. “Rarity, did you really just do that? Offer your base to him?”

“Well,” she tapped her horn and hummed, “I’ll be honest, I cast a numbing spell on my horn just in case, but yes,” she said with curiosity, “but I truly expected him to attack me and send me sprawling like a drunkard when I exposed myself to him,” she smiled at her sister. “What have you done to fix his reactions so quickly? You must tell me everything,” she started toward the door and looked back to see her sister pawing at the ground.

“Oh, darling… don’t fret. I purchased more sweets and chocolate powder to make up for earlier.”

“Rarity, I have some stuff to tell you about today… when we were with Snickers.”

Snickers ran into his room and looked under the bed, then in the closet, finally he climbed on his bed and looked around. He saw a notebook on the book shelf with a pencil atop it. He hopped to the floor and climbed the shelf, knocked the writing equipment down and finally lay on the floor with the pencil in his lips, tongue against the eraser, and the first lined page was ready.

He started writing, the pencil scratching along the lines again and again until before he knew it a whole page was filled. The next page he started to draw, writing and drawing lines between what he wrote and the very exact images he created as fast as his mouth would allow. He heard quiet speaking, which he realized was normal speaking but at a distance.

It was his family. He dropped the pencil and it made a line through a drawing he’d made, a drop of drool joining it right after. Family. He thought the word over and over in his head. He had a family; it sucked, he was technicaly an only child, his ‘mother’ was a bitch… but it was real in every aspect of the word.

Something he’d lost years ago, and now had a chance with from the beginning. His new life and future were unwritten; he looked at the outer ring of a collar made from metal he’d drawn and then to the door. The melodic voices carrying into his room shoved the raw hatred from his heart and, for just this once, he’d give them a chance.

He looked at the page he’d written on and used a heavy hoof to rip the page out. He ate it in three bites, then looked at the diagram and frowned. “What is wrong with me?” he read the word at the top and several terrible memories ran through his mind. “What would I even consider making one, much less using it on these ponies?”

He closed his eyes and raised his snout, inhaling deeply and exhaling, trying to clear his mind and chest from the anger he carried. Something some old nag once taught him and it seemed to work.

“What’s a ‘bomb collar’?” Sweetie asked from behind him. He freaked out and scraped a hoof across the page, tearing it and several others, shredding them as he worked to erase the evil he’d started to create. He didn’t know he’d been chewing the pages until Rarity shouted his name and brought him back to the moment.

He looked at Rarity and her horn, glowing and keeping him aloft. He looked at the shredded papers around him and then he spat a semi chewed wad of papers on the floor, covering his mouth and whining quietly. Rarity stood over her sister and glared askance at him, but she put him down to focus on her sister’s cheek.

He stood and ran to Sweetie, sliding the last little way and crawling to grab her foreleg with tears brimming in his eyes. “I’m so sorry! I don’t know what happened, I didn’t mean it, please don’t kick me out…” he looked up to Rarity and practically pleaded with her. “Please, just let me have tonight, I’ll do anything to stay here.

“Please,” he pressed Sweetie’s hoof to the bridge of his muzzle and whimpered, almost crying again for the sixth time that day. “Please, I don’t wanna be out there again. I won’t make it, I won’t…”

Rarity and Sweetie hugged him between them and Sweetie cried, both from the emotion of the moment and the sting from the cut along her cheekbone he’d accidentally given her. “Snickers, if Rarity sends you away, I’m going with you,” she said sternly.

“Guh-uh-what?! I’d do no such thing! Snickers,” she moved back and lay on her belly to see at their level, “I swear to you on everything that means anything to me two things, my dear. One, I will never, never abandon you or make you suffer. Do you understand that?”

He nodded, realizing he was hugging Sweetie on his own accord and liking it. “And… number two?”

“The bathroom’s that way, dear,” she pointed with a hoof, then grinned just before he did. Sweetie snerked right after and they giggled and laughed for a few seconds. “Seriously, though… I want to have fun with you, as I do anypony that I know. But number two is by far the most important and serious thing, nay, rule I have of anypony that lives with me, regardless of where that may be or whom that creature is.”

He smiled at her, expecting something silly now. “What’s that? Nightly baths?” he rolled his eyes.

“No, that’s a given. What you must know, is that you will leave this house, every time, looking,” she stood and flounced her mane, singing the next word as though it were part of an opera. “Fabulous!”

Bathtime

The sun had set, Snickers had cleaned his papers up, and now he sat on the floor beside the bookcase with his eyes closed, enjoying a moment to contemplate his recent choice of designing neckware.

What the hell was I thinking? I might have started the ball rolling on bomb collars by just letting that filly see what I’d drawn. Why the hell did I write what it was at the top of the page? How stupid can I be in a single day? Don’t answer that, brain.

“Snickers?” Sweetie asked from outside the doorway. He looked at her and his ear flicked in a way ponies used to ask another to continue. “Um, the bath’s ready, so you’ve gotta take one now. Afterwards we can play in my room, Rarity said the door has to stay open, though. I asked her why and she just told me, ‘because I said so.’ Sisters,” she huffed.

He got up and stretched his left hind leg. “Alright, I’ll be there in a minute. I’ve gotta, um, you know,” he looked askance and she cocked her head.

“Oh, ya gotta pee? No prob, toilet’s in the bathroom by the bathtub!” She turned and he saw her tail sway when she practically pranced away.

“Yeah, that… alright, time to scrub some scum off my nuts,” he took a step and smiled. “I haven’t been this clean and healthy in years, no scum is good scum.” He made his way into the bathroom and looked around, the tub was large and oval standing off the floor with six little feet so in certain climates logs could be put under it to heat the water.

He closed the door, and went to the squat toilet. He looked at it and smiled. “Something so simple makes all the difference in the world." He reached back and bit the skirt he’d made, tossing it aside like the rag it was and stood over the porcelain, letting his bladder relieve itself.

“Snickers! Hurry up and come in,” Sweetie said happily, scaring the colt into a panicked run head first into the wall, knocking several bottles of shampoo and a plastic yellow duckie to the floor. “Ouch, are you okay?”

He whined and rubbed his head, he whined at the pain in his tail he’d landed on, his head from hitting the wall, and his dignity from being seen peeing so casually. “I think I am,” he stood and his legs trembled. “What’re you doing in my bath? Why’d you have to scare me, there’s pee on the floor! Oh no, Rarity’s gonna kill me and flay my hide!”

“Ew! Gross, why would you even say that, Snickers?” Sweetie stuck her tongue out and leaned out of the water, forelegs dangling from the tub. He reached for a towel and dropped it on what he’d missed and leaned onto it to soak it up before tossing the towel aside. “Ya know, it’s not that bad. Fillies make a mess a lot cuz when we gotta go,” she scooped some bubbles in her hoof and blew them away to land on the floor, “we sometimes gotta go and can’t make it all the way.

“It really sucks, but nature sucks. Otherwise we’d have our cutie marks and start being adults, right?”

He looked at her and shook his head. “I mentioned it hours ago, but there’re so many more important things than a butt mark.”

“Whatever, hurry and get in, I need my back washed and can’t reach.”

He watched her slide back casually and vanish into the bubbles. “You know, too much soap can lead to a UTI in mares, right?” he said to no one.

“True,” Rarity said startling him and he almost lost his footing, barely avoiding a slip, “but medicine and magic cure that right up before it’s an issue. Now, in you go,” she lifted him with her magic and dropped him into the water beside her sister.

The water tingled and stung his skin for an instant, then under the water he felt completely relaxed, enough to finish what little he had left of what he’d started before being terrified into a wall. He surfaced and tittered in a girly way. “I haven’t had a hot bath in so long,” he giggled at the heat surrounding him.

“Yes, well, I’ll help you both clean up and then you may play for twenty minutes. No more or your hooves with get soft and you’ll slip across the floor.”

Sweetie was lifted in her sisters magic to the edge of the tub with her belly and legs in the water as a loofah glowing with a blue aura brushed her coat. “Yeah, that’s because I stayed in for an hour once and slipped and got a bloody nose. It was so cool!”

“For you, perhaps. For me it was an effort in futility when I tried to clean it from the towel. I had to throw it away and I liked that towel.”

“Cold water,” Snickers said picking bubbles up with his snout. “Gets the blood out with a little scrubbing, easy peasy, blood’s so easy!” He sneezed and scattered bubbles across the tub. He laughed and reached both legs out to gather a bunch and bite at them.

“Thank you for the insight, but you really shouldn’t eat the bubbles, darling.”

He coughed and started laughing while coughing. “Heh, soapy,” he spat into the tub getting gross looks from the girls, “but tastes like berries! Oh, yum… so much trouble with this choice,” he looked at the suds and then to the others, conceding defeat. “Okay, no bubbles for a snack.” He splashed water at them and ducked under when Rarity scolded him, her voice nothing but high pitched mumbles.

He surfaced again and heard the tail end of Sweetie giggling. “Rarity, be gentle! I’m a filly of high society and shan’t be scrubbed like some common ruffian.”

Rarity snickered at her sister. “Yes, quite. Now that she’d cleaned up it’s your turn, young stallion. Then it’s your task to clean your manes, I’ll be just outside the door reading a magazine while you have your fun as you do.”

Rarity pulled him to the same spot she’d had Sweetie and trembled when the scrubbing started. “Snickers, you must relax or you’ll get a cramp. Hot water cures many an ailment, but you don’t want to ruin your experience by giving Sweetie an unfair advantage, do you?”

He looked at the filly wearing a hat and moustache made of bubbles. “Yeah, right. I don’t buy it.” The scrubbing moved to his underbelly and he quickly felt his body responding. He squirmed futilie in her magic as she unknowingly went around his elongated member that was not used to the heat of a hot bath, making it even harder.

The loofah went against his little nuggets and he yelped, flailing his legs and he was dropped into the water with a large splash. He surfaced and was blushing fircely. Rarity apologized. “I’m so sorry, I was distracted and washed you as I’d washed only fillies, I hadn’t thought of your different parts,” she bit her lip and tinted a light pink in embarrassment.

He shook his head and held a hoof out to her. “I’ll take care of those areas,” he said and when the loofah was placed on his hoof it sank under the water. Rarity averted her attention to a broken bottle of shampoo that’d leaked into the toilet while Sweetie wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He scrubbed everything that was exposed and then very hesitantly held the loofah towards his foster mother.

She took it and moved it to the sink very quickly. “Yes, well, shampoo… I’ll just,” she lit her horn and a bottle of lavender shampoo floated to him while a strawberry scented one waited for Sweetie to surface. Snickers turned around in the tub, staying low so he’d keep himself hidden until it went back in, then felt the most embarrassed and shame in his life.

He felt himself, his fifth leg, strike something that wasn’t him under the water. Sweetie surfaced and held a hoof to her cheek. “What’s with you slapping me on my face, Snickers?” she asked with a pout, bottom lip out. She looked at him, then to her sister who was now pink from her neck to her ears.

Snickers crossed his forelegs under the water, holding it to his body as it finally receded, just after ruining his life like his mom said it would someday. He sank in the water, Rarity gave both shampoo to Sweetie Belle, then stepped back. “Sweetie, have fun playing and don’t do anything inappropriate.”

She backed out of the bathroom and once around the corner she broke and laughter filled the boutique. “What’s she laughing at?” Sweetie asked with her innocence on full display. Snickers blew bubbles under water and Sweetie looked at him in shock. "Did you toot? Gross,” she backed away and lifted a wad of suds in her hoof. “I shall defeat you, stinky monster, and you’ll never trouble my snout again!”

She launched the bubbles with a ferocity of the ages right at the stunned colt. If it were a different scenario he’d certainly have his life flash before his eyes as the end approached. This time, though, the suds scattered across Sweetie’s mane and barely made it past her outstretched leg.

“Darn, misfire,” she fake pouted again getting a laugh from Snickers. Rarity’s laughter had died down and he looked at his aunt with narrowed eyes. “Wait! Manes and tails first, then I show you the error of your ways,” Sweetie exclaimed, tossing him the red bottle and holding a hoof to her lips.

He nodded and started washing his mane, dipped under water again, and reached for his tail. He growled as it just eluded his bite and lips because the water went through and around the hair in a way he wasn’t used to at all. He heard Sweetie holding a laugh behind a hoof and glared at her. “What’s so funny?”

“You look like a dizzy dog doing that,” she moved closer to him and grabbed his tail by the root and pulled with both hooves in a way that sent chills up his back. “This’ why we don’t bathe alone, we’d never get the hard to reach spots. I’ll do your tail, then you do mine, okay?”

He gasped when she tugged again, but managed a nod. It wasn’t a sexual feeling he was having, per se, but it was akin to stretching a foreleg he didn’t know was stiff. Sweetie was expertly tugging and working with his tail’s natural movements to clean it and tug just right. “Apple Bloom has a tail like yours, you know,” she started.

“Only it gets really matted and tangled and yours doesn’t. It’s probably from chores on the farm, but it could be from our adventuring, too. Anyway, she gets really stressed and carries it in her tail, so when we take a bath we take turns doing each other’s tails and giving them tugs or twists to loosed them up.”

“Loosen, Sweetie Belle,” Rarity called from the hallway.

“Everypony’s a dictionary,” Sweetie grumbled. “So, yeah! Now, I know you’ve never done it before, so you don’t have to bother. I’ll be fine without a tail tug until the next time I’m with the other crusaders. We can teach you! It’ll be so much fun, maybe we’ll get our marks in tail massage, or tail tugging, or... washing?” she shook her head. “Nah, I’ll pass on that one.”

He dipped under the water again and ran his hooves through his mane, making sure to clean it the best he could. Once back up he looked back and saw Sweetie nod, then pass the bottle of shampoo to him, the picture of a plant he didn’t know, same for the scent. He poured a small dollop onto her lower back getting a squeak and comment about the frigidness, then he let the bottle float in the water while his hooves tried to reach through her tail hairs to the tail itself. He managed to bump against it, brush the edge of his hooves against it, and twice he caught it, only for it to slip away.

Sweetie’s giggling got his attention and she was looking back at him intensively. He gasped and then splashed water at her. “You… booger!” he, proud he covered his swearing for the first time in his life. “You’re just teasing me, aren’t you?”

“Maaaaybe,” she replied and quickly lifted her tail out of the water, splashing him when it went up and bringing it down, back into the water with a clap that passed over his head; stinging him like he’d been slapped, because he had been. “That’s for slapping me, twice!”

He leapt at her and she screamed, ducking under the water and swimming under him. She popped back up and sprayed water from her mouth directly into his face when he turned around, then laughed at his expression.

“Oh, it… is… on.”

Rarity sat outside the bathroom, listening to them playing and enjoying the moment sitting with her back against the wall and ears aimed at the room itself. She was loathe to admit it to herself, but she was acting exactly like Fluttershy had accused her of since he’d arrived, not like a caring adult at all.

Tomorrow, however, was a new day for her to bond with him and learn of his past from himself, to help him open up, to introduce him to Rainbow Dash, and start working with everypony to help him start a new life free of the horrors and pain he’d already been through. Whether he was truly an adult reverted to a child, or a child with an imagination to cover himself in a blanket of lies to keep himself from the world, she’d be there for him.

A happy scream came from the room and she rocked in a single motion to all four hooves so she could peek around the corner. A smile grew as large as it could on her face seeing them play, and to realize that not only was he acting like a foal his age, but he screamed louder than Sweetie Belle.

It was certainly to be denied, but families exist for moments like the one she was watching.

Her horn glowed and unnoticed by the splashing two, the water on the floor slid quickly to the toilet so it would be less likely to cause a slip.

“Hang on, Snickers, I’ve gotta go pee quick!”

“Ew, not in the bath!” he stuck out his tongue at her and she replied the same.

“You did when you got in! But fillies are better than colts because colts have something on their heads.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?” he asked in mock anger.

She splashed him with a hoof full of bubbles and water, screaming in laughter when his head was finally covered with suds. She scrambled over the edge and nearly slipped if it weren’t for the rigid padding around the tub to prevent just that. She went to the toilet and Snickers turned away.

Sweetie smiled kindly at the back of his head at the respect he’d given her she felt she should have given him earlier. Her tail swayed aside, for what little it meant being soaked and being in the splash zone, as just so happened to be. She braced herself and started to go, losing her hooves from under her legs and falling with her tail under her into the porcelain with all her weight on it.

The shriek was unlike anything he’d wanted to hear ever again and he spun around to look at her and his heart broke seeing the pain in her face. Rarity came around the corner like a smooth arrow and ran to her sister before he could get out of the tub.

“Sweetie, what happened? Please, talk to me!” Rarity asked in a rushed panic to the still shrieking and crying filly. Snickers arrived and went around Rarity, shoving Sweetie over and dodging a reactive swipe from Rarity as she tried to push him away from attacking her sister.

“Her tail!” he pointed and Rarity looked, bringing her hoof to her mouth. He moved quickly and bit the tip of Sweetie’s tail, jerking it with all his might and getting a clack from her coccyx, where spine met tail.

Sweetie groaned and fell to her side, groaning weakly. “What have you done?! Snickers, did you break her tail more than it was?”

“Shut it ya…” he clenched his jaw as Rarity picked up Sweetie, not breaking her glare on him. “She dislocated it, badly. We have to get her to the hospital, where’s the hospital? Rarity, we have to go, now!” Rarity snapped out of her stupor and put her sister on her back, galloping from the room with Snickers right behind her.

Author's Notes:

Ouch!