Luna and Celestia both stop screaming and look at each other and then see they are both covered in the Night Horror's squashed remains, both saying in unison, "EEEEWWWWW!!!"

I look down at them and smile sheepisly and rub my head and say, "Sorry, didn't mean to splatter the both of ya when ah stomped on it." I look around and see that the fire went away, leaving a ripe field of wheat to harvest and see the combine sitting in the field waiting to be run.

Luna looks to where the boot landed and follows the leg up, and up, and up, until she sees his face looking down at them both with an sheepish expression and rubbing the back of his head. She then glares at him and then says, "You could have at least warned us you were going to squash him so we could turn away!"

I continue to rub my head sheepishly and look to side saying, "Ah didn't think to warn ya, all ah heard was ya two scream and then ah raised mah foot and stomped on it to keep it from hurtin' ya any further. Are ya both okay though?"

Celestia huffs and then says, "Aside from being covered in goo, we will be ok. We will both probably have to wash up after this to get rid of the icky sensation. I must know though, why are you so big? You must easily be 400 feet tall, and your auburn hair is flowing like ours."

I cock my head and then say, "Ah am and it is? Ah have no clue how ah'm so big but apparently ah'm somehow the son of a god, though ah'm a million tahmes removed. All ah know is that ah remembered mah purpose in lahf and that ah face death head on and don't let it scare me, death is just another part of livin'." I then get a shiver up my spine and then feel myself begin to shrink.

Luna smiles and says, "Well that is certainly interesting, who is this god that is your distant father?"

I shake my head and hold my head in my hands, rubbing my temples as I feel a headache coming on and answer, "Well he said that his name is Thor, have you heard of him by chance? In my world, he is an ancient mythological god of thunder and wields the lightning hammer of creation or destruction, Mjolnir. There is no way to prove that he actually existed though."

Her eyes widen in shock as he says the name and she quickly says, "We have heard that some ponies on this world, mostly the Yaks of Yakyakistan believe there was once a mighty god called Thor and a hammer called Mjolnir. There are many different stories about him but there is one rumor out there that all beings on this planet share. That Thor once defeated vast enemies that wished to dominate a young planet once called Veljikna. As the planet aged, life started to develop on its own. After the planet evolved a few times, changing it's appearance drastically over millions of years, some organisms began to develop sentience and start to improve their lifestyle. Many more years passed by and they began fighting each other endlessly, threatening all life on the planet. Thor was angered by their ignorance and refusal to get along and used the mighty hammer Mjolnir to break the planet apart and scatter them across the vast universe, hoping one day they might meet each other and learn to get along." She then lightly shakes her head and clears her throat and gets back to the matter at hand and says, "Unfortunately, there aren't any means by which we can prove them. Therefore it shall remain a rumor and a mystery for the time being, we are both grateful for you saving our lives from that Night Horror. I came after I was making my rounds through the dream realm and finished dealing with one ponies nightmare when I sensed a great fear coming from your door and tried to stop it but couldn't and went to get my sister to help me."

I smile and then notice I am finally back down to my normal size and lean over, then pull Luna and Celestia in for a big bear hug. I decide to give them both a kiss on the cheek and say, "Thank you for trying to save me from it, ah had no idea that nightmares are dangerous."

Luna smiles and then pulls out of the hug, followed by her sister and says, "You are welcome. Normally nightmares are simple to deal with, but on occasion a night terror will come around. Bad dreams can affect any pony's mind, but night terrors or even a Night Horror can cause bodily harm. It has been several months since I last had to fight a Night Terror, but I am strong enough to defeat them. I shall let you return to your dream Roger, congratulations on learning that you are related to a god through your blood." She then turns to her sister and says, "Sister, I shall be along shortly to lower the moon so you can raise the sun together. I need to make him aware of the event that is starting the day after tomorrow." She turns to face him as Celestia starts to leave and is about to say something but is cut off.

I blush as I look to the side and say, "Umm, ya mean about Estrus Season?

Her jaw drops and she closes it and says, "How do you know about that already, I was just about to warn you about it. Did Twilight or one of the other girls inform you already?"

I chuckle and say, "It was Bright Bolt that gave me clues, then ah guessed the rest after puttin' the pieces together. It starts in a couple days and lasts for three weeks right? She also told me about some kind of Moon Tea that helps fight off the worst of the effects that also serves as a contraceptive, so tell me, how long does that take to start to take effect. Ah need to know cus ah ain't goin' nowhere, ah gotts land to git and turn into workable fields before ah even attempt to plant crops. On top of all that, ah gotta git them dairy cows milked before they git mastits. Before ah do that, ah have milk tanks that need to be checked and dumped if the milk is warm or smells slightly off."

Luna stares at him with her head cocked to the side and says, "It starts to take the worst of the effects off in a few hours, but the contraceptive starts to work once it is consumed. Why do you need to do that, can't you just use em the way they are now? Why would you waste milk like that?"

I rub my chin in thought and then say, "Okay where can ah find some to have on hand in case of emergencies? Ah hafta make the land smooth enough to where mah equipment can function properly, there are way too many hills that would prevent that. Ah hafta follow strict guidelines and rules when it comes to selling a consumable product to consumers, ya see, milk is deemed ruined if it is allowed to rise above a certain temperature for too long. The milk inside those tanks are kept cold by a device that is powered by electricity, the tanks aren't built like a refrigerator. Therefore, they start to warm up when the power goes out."

Luna looks at him with light interest and then says, "You can acquire it in many towns and cities across Equestria, the closest place for you would either have to be the town of Ponyville, Canterlot, or the Alchemist in the Everfree Forest called Zecora."

I smack myself on the side of the head forgetting to bring up the biggest issue of all...FUEL and say, "Do ya ponies happen to know what Gasoline, oil, or Diesel is?"

Celestia steps forth and says, "Unfortnately no we do not have any idea what those are, what are those things that you mentioned and what do they do?"

I sigh and then set my hands on my hips and kick the ground and say, "Well Diesel and Gasoline are both used as fuels that operate engines. You can't burn Gasoline in an engine that is designed for Diesel, it is the same in reverse. Oil is used as lubrication for machinery and parts. Do ya know what crude oil is by chance?"

Luna looks at him with her eyebrows scrunched together and says, "Sorry but we do not know what that is, is that important for the operating of your farm?"

I then sigh in aggravation and then look down briefly and then back up at them and say, "Its vital because none of those can exist without it. Ya see, crude oil is pulled out of the ground that is made up of the dead plants and animals from millions of years ago, it is derived into those things with many different grades for each one."

Celestia smiles with a glimmer of hope in her eyes and quickly says, "Oh is it a thick black substance found in the ground?"

I then look at her quickly and say, "Yes it is and it is flammable, which means that it will burn when in the presence of fire that is hot enough. The others ah've mentioned are as well and have their own point in which they begin to burn. Please send out some people to collect samples of each type ah have immediately so ya can start figuring out how to make them. With all the work ah hafta do to git back to farmin, ah'm gonna need them developed ASAP. If ah run out of either one of those things, it means that ah can't farm without it and ah'll hafta go back to the ancient days of usin' horses to pull the equipment ah use on the farm."

She narrows her eyes at him, unhappy of what he is implying and says, "We will send out a team of researchers to gather samples of everything derived from crude oil immediately first thing in the morning. I am displeased that you even suggested using ponies for such a heavy task, what you are implying can be interpreted as slavery. Be more careful with what you say or I may banish you to the moon for punishment."

I cross my arms and look right back at her and say with a cool head, "Look princess, life's a bitch. When yer a farmer, it can be an even bigger bitch. All ya can do is just deal with it and turn the other cheek, or flank in yer case." I then slowly lean in to stare at her harder, baiting her.

Celestia steps a little closer and glares harder into his eyes as her mane begins to slowly smolder then says, "Stop saying the word bitch, I am starting to find it very offensive." while leaning in closer to stare him down.

I smile internally while keeping my face calm and continue leaning in and say, "Better not send them before 9am because ah'm gonna be too busy with chores and the mornin' milkin'." I watch as she continues to slowly get within arms reach.

She creeps a little closer, determined to win this staredown and says, "Very well, but you better be waiting for when they get there."

I remember a song from a show I once watched and then say, "Oh princess, do ya know what's on mah mind right now? She finally gets close enough and stops about a foot away from me as I crouch down on my right knee, then extend my left leg a little to prop myself up a bit.

Celestia stops in front of him with his face just over a foot from the end of her muzzle while squinting at him suspiciously and then says, "No, what is on your mind Roger?"

I then start grinning as I start to sing Kyle's Mom's a Bitch from the show.

Luna's jaw drops open in shock as her sister's face turns into a complete scowl as she then waits for him to stop and then starts to bellow, "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU TO STO..." She is then abruptly cut off by Roger suddenly kissing her.

I suddenly close the distance between us and move a hand behind her head lightly and angle my head as I pull her head slightly down to mine and slip my tongue into her mouth when our faces meet, causing her eyes to go as wide as saucers.

Celestia's brain ceases to function as she suddenly is being Prench kissed by someone she just met, then starts to go into a freakout as her white coat on her head turn beet red in embarrassment. The embarrassment lasts for only a second as she feels him slide his tongue around in her mouth and then bites down on it, almost tempted to bite it off as her mane fumes as he tries to get his tongue back by wiggling it against hers.

I feel her bite down harder on my tongue and stop teasing her and hold my hands up in surrender and try to say, "Awright, awright. Ah'm sorry, please don't bite my tongue off. Ah do need it fer talkin ya know, why does yer mouth taste lahk cake?"

She blushes furiously again and releases his tongue quickly when she tastes blood in her mouth, then watches as he falls back on his ass and then stammers when her sister fights a tittering fit, "How dare you steal a kiss from me!? I don't know you, you aren't my special somepony! What gives you the idea that you can Prench Kiss me like that!"

I chuckle lightly and then shrug my shoulders and say, "Ah wanted to mess with ya is all, grats on drawin' first blood. One of us was bound to bleed first and it was me, so congrats."

Celestia hears Luna start tittering and rolls her eyes then understands what he said can also mean something else. Causing her to growl and say, "Why you...you...YOU ASS! OHHH I WILL GET YOU BACK FOR THAT!" before leaving in a huff and exiting the dream through the sliding door.

Luna gets her tittering under control and then frowns slightly and says, "You didn't have to go that far just to mess with her, why in Equestria did you Prench Kiss her?"

I grin and then stand up and say, "One, ah tend to enjoy annoyin' those that ah call friends. Two, ah wanted to see if she would freak out about it, which she did. Three, ah was gettin even fer her tryin' to tell me what to do the other day."

She sighs and shakes her head saying, "I would advise you not to go too far with your pranks on her, she might hold a grudge against you like she does with Discord."

Celestia angrily walks down the hall of the Dream Realm thinking about the kiss he stole and says, "Well it wasn't actually that bad, really. Ugh that is not the point though, he should not have kissed me at all! He does have a talent for kissing though, I wonder what other talents he has..." She shakes her head to rid it of that thought before it goes any further and says, "UH UH SO NOT GOING THERE! What is wrong with me being so distracted over that kiss...I must be getting hungry. I wonder if there is a piece of cake in the cold room I can snack on until morning comes and we can have breakfast." She then looks back and shouts down the hall, "LUNA ARE YOU COMING, I WOULD LIKE TO GET BACK TO THE REAL WORLD SOMETIME TODAY!"

Luna chuckles and then says, "I should get going now, my sister gets really moody if she doesn't have her morning snack. We shall see you at the party today, enjoy the rest of your dream." She then turns around and walks out of his dream and returns to her sister and says, "You are really in a rush to get back aren't you Cece, you must really be wanting your morning cake." She then chuckles as her sister blushes and looks away, she then grins and leads them both out of the Dream Realm.

Discord sniggers at the trick he just played on the newest arrival to Equestria and Ponyville and says, "Welcome to your new home Roger Sheridan, you have a strange sense of humor. They are funny though, but ya better lay off on tormenting the Royals or you may become the newest addition to Canterlot's statue garden. When I am feeling healthy again, I will introduce myself. It's a pity that I will miss your welcome party."

Twilight's nose catches something delicious in the air and causes her to stir and slowly awaken. She slowly opens her eyes and takes a deep breath and props herself up and thinks, "I wonder what Spike is cooking today? Wait a moment, this isn't my room. Oh buck, don't tell me I slept in the same bed as Roger!" She looks around in a panic and quickly realizes that she did indeed share the same bed and takes a deep breath and forces herself to calm down and climbs down off the bed and sees the discarded pair of pants that Roger wore yesterday and then thinks, "I hope he was at least decent enough to not go to bed wearing nothing, or else I will kick him for being improper! I better go see what Roger is making for breakfast, I wonder what time he got up this morning." She opens the door and walks through it to hear a sizzling sound coming from the kitchen.

I am slaving away in the kitchen when I hear my bedroom door creak open as I watch the bacon and eggs sizzling in their pots and flip over the pancake and call out, "Good Mornin' to ya Twilight, how many pancakes and eggs do ya want?"

She makes her way into the dining room and sits at the table and then says, "Four pancakes please and two eggs sunny side up please. What else are you cooking in there that smells so good?"

I grin as I take the pancake out and stack it on the other two and flip the two eggs over and say, "Ah would tell ya but that would ruin the surprise. Ah will tell ya this though, ah'm conductin' an experiment with a fact from my world that is true about our horses. Ah want to find out if it is true, here as well." I make the rest of our food and set a fork and a knife on the table in front of where she is sitting, then set her food down on the table before her and bring the syrup and butter out. I place them on the table and then say to her, "Okay now for the experiment, please close your eyes and wait for me to say open your mouth. Don't worry, it is nothing dirty ah promise."

Twilight smiles and then nods and says, "Okay no problem, I love experiments." She then closes her eyes and then waits for him to speak.

I look over and grin, grabbing a cooler piece of bacon and break it into three small pieces to feed to Twilight to see if she can stand eating it. I then grab an empty ice cream bucket just in case she can't stand it, then make my way over to the table and say, "Okay Twilight, now open your mouth and tell me if this type of food makes you sick at all. Ah've a bucket here just in case you can't stand eating it."

She is curious at what the food will be and opens her mouth and waits for it, then feels something warm and somewhat stiff and hard in places being set on her tongue. She then closes her mouth and begins chewing on it, really enjoying the strong flavor it has to it. Her stomach growls hungrily and she swallows it down and then says, "That was delicious, I would like more of that!"

I smile at seeing an opportunity to tease her coming up and then continue to give her another small piece of bacon and watch as she chews on it with passion and searches for another and I say, "Wow, ah didn't know that ponies could actually eat meat here too." I watch as her face freezes and slowly turns around to look at me with wide open eyes.

Twilight is shocked to the core at what he just said and stares at him with wide eyes and says, "T-This is m-meat? That I am eating?"

I grin and then nod my head and say, "Yep congratulations you just tried your first piece of horse meat, welcome to the Cannibal Club."

Her eyes shrink to pinpricks as she begins to have a freakout and then says, "Oh no, that's not possible. Pony can't taste that delicious can it?" Her mind begins to spiral into madness and she starts to softly titter at first, then goes into chuckling softly.

I chuckle and realize she is freaking out about it and stop her freakout and grab her chin and force her to look me in the eye and say, "Calm down, it is just bacon from a pig. Ah was messing with you when ah said it was horse meat."

Twilight hears what he says and her eyes return to normal in an instant and she says, "YOU WERE MESSING WITH ME! I THOUGHT I COMMITTED A GRAVE CRIME!" She then calms down a little bit and then asks, "Was that really just pig meat you just fed me?"

I laugh and then say, "Of course it was just bacon from a pig, ah eat it evry mornin fer breakfast. Yer reaction was funny when ya first thought it was meat from a horse. Lahk ah said, horse meat is very hard to find in the states. Horses on Earth can eat meat too, but in small portions. Do you want any toast with your breakfast?"

She breathes a sigh of relief and then says, "Yes please, I will have two slices lightly browned. I find it strange that ponies can eat meat at all. We do have haybacon of course, but it does not taste the same as this though."

I grin and say, "Wanna know a trick ah use to help improve the flavor just a little bit, ah drizzle maple syrup along each slice of bacon before ah flip it over. Want some salt and pepper too?" I make my way to the kitchen to brown four slices of toast while I wait for her to answer.

Twilight cocks her head curiously and says, "That must have been what threw me off a little bit, you have some skill as a cook. Yes please, thank you so much for making breakfast this morning. How long have you been awake for?"

I grab the salt and pepper shakers and take them to the table and set them down, then go back to get the toast and butter and set them on the table as well and ask, "Ah've been up since sunrise, do ya want milk or orange juice?"

She smiles and then says, "Is this the same milk that we had for dinner last night?"

I look over my shoulder at her and say, "Nope, ah used the last of that last night. Ah had'ta dump the milk that was stored in the tanks this mornin' cause it got warm and went bad. This stuff is fresh from this mornin's milkin', do ya wanna try some?"

Twilight's ears perk up at the chance to try fresh milk from cows that came from a different world and eagerly says, "I would love to try some of it. Can I get a glass of orange juice as well please?"

I grab a shot glass and the jug of milk I filled this morning, make my way over to the table and set down the big shot glass. I then fill it just over halfway with milk and return the jug to the fridge, then I grab a crystal clear glass from the cupboard and get the jug of orange juice that is in the fridge. I return to the table and set it to the side of her plate and then fill it, I set the jug on the table to refill her glass if she asks for more. I then grab one more glass out of the cupboard and fill my plate as well, making sure to put a knife and fork on the plate along with four of the six remaining pieces of bacon to make a bacon and egg sandwich. I move the remaining bacon to the plate with the stack of four remaining pancakes I made this morning and say, "So how is the milk from this mornin's milking?"

She finishes off the small glass and then wipes her lips off and says, "It was delicious, I can't believe that it tastes so much like our own milk, if a tad bit tastier." She watches as he brings the plate of extra food over and sets them to her left, between his seat and hers. She blushes and trying to think of the polite way to ask if he slept in his pants or not and says, "Did you sleep well last night?"

I grab my plate and glass, then head to the table and sit down at the end of the table with her sitting on the right side with a chair between us and the extra food in the middle. I then grab the butter and put a hunk of it on the blade and spread it around on the top, then return it to where it was and answer, "Yes ah did aside from the odd dream ah had with the princesses in it fighting a strange creature when ah became huge and stomped on the thing and squashed it, incidentally spraying them with the juices that sprayed out from it. Ah'm jus' glad that dreams never actually happen."

Twilight chuckles and then smiles and says, "Well actually, dreams do actually happen here. They are a part of the dream realm that Princess Luna protects at night while everypony sleeps, so that fight most likely did happen. What all occurred during your dream?

I pause as I am about to take another piece of pancake into my mouth when I hear her say that dreams really do happen here and then put the piece in my mouth and chew it, then swallow it and say, "Well, ah was in a horrific field fire that was caused by a tractor slammin' into the side of my combine and trapped me inside it, a fire then broke out due to the collision and started the field of wheat ready to harvest on fire. Ah started to scream for help but nobody came until ah picked up some small chunk of glowin' shiny metal, then ah heard some male voice start talkin' to me and told me that ah was his son a million tahmes removed and that his name was Thor. He then told me that if ah didn't do somethin' the two princesses would die, then ah remembered my role and purpose in life and became huge and stomped on the thing like an insignificant bug and the two princesses got covered in its juices that sprayed out onto them. The rest though is a secret so ah can't tell ya that jus' yet. Eat up cus we gots a party to get to, ah have all the chores done for the day and ah need to git started on sortin my land crisis out. Ah have a feelin that what yer really askin' is if ah was a gentleman or not, so here's yer answer. Ah slept next to ya in mah pants, when ah woke up mah arm was around ya and ya had a grip on it. It took a little tahm but ah managed to pry mahself out of it without wakin' ya up."

She sighs in relief at hearing that and then says, "Thank you for being a gentlecolt, I greatly appreciate how thoughtful you were with not leaving me in that shed among those books. Wow, I can't believe that an ancient and powerful god that once split the massive planet into many, many smaller planets is your father. Did you get any special powers from him at all? If you don't know, we can always run tests to find out if you don't mind being a test subject for a few hours some day?" She then grins sheepishly as she catches herself nerding out and then goes back to eating her breakfast. She then eyes the two remaining pieces of bacon and asks, "Do you mind if I eat the last two pieces of bacon?"

I smile and then swallow the large piece of pancake I am chewing and say, "Go right ahead and help yerself, jus' be careful though ya don't eat too much of it and make yerself sick."

A couple minutes pass by as they eat when Twilight smiles and takes the last two pieces with her magic and uses the black pepper and sprinkles some on top of the eggs. She then makes a bacon egg sandwich with them after watching how he made his and copies it. She then holds the completed sandwich and takes an experimental bite of it and immensely enjoys it, then goes to quickly devouring the rest of it and taking the last two pancakes and drinks more of her orange juice. Refilling her glass and setting the jug back, she then says, "This is a really delicious breakfast you have made, thank you very much."

I grin and finish the last of my pancakes and juice then say, "Yer quite welcome, it's nice to have some company for a change. Just to give ya a heads up, ya'll be gittin teased by Bright Bolt for the adorable position ya were in while ah was holdin' ya." I then get up and gather the rest of the dishes and take them to the sink and fill it with water and soap, then set the dishes into the sink. I leave the big dishes for last because they have grease and stuff on it that has to go down the garbage disposal. I then return the butter and the orange juice to the fridge when I hear Twilight get off her chair.

She gets off her chair and then says, I can help you with the dishes if you would like me to?" She looks up to him, hoping to do something to help him out a little.

I smile and then say, "Sure, pull up a chair. Ya can dry while ah wash, how does that sound?" I then get started on scrubbing them clean as she pulls up a chair and say, "The towels are in the second drawer down to the left of the large door under the drying rack on the counter."

Twilight searches for the drawer mentioned and pulls out a short towel and gets started on drying the dishes, setting the plates in the far back and the two glasses on the sides with the silverware in the basket. She then sets the pots into the rack and asks, "Is there anything else I can help you with before we go to the party?"

I chuckle lightly and then think for a moment and say, "The rest ah can do mahself, thanks fer askin' though. Can ya tell me where this alchemist Zecora lives so ah can git some Moon Tea from her? Princess Luna told me about her but Bright Bolt gave me a few clues that ah put together and guessed it. She then informed me about the tea and then ah went to take ya to mah bed since ah need to get a new mattress and a new couch."

She then smiles and then says, "Sure I can take you to her, I need to see her myself for that same reason."

I then hear a knock at the door and then sigh happily and say, "Finally, ah was wondering when they would get here to collect their samples to study." I then pull the plug in both sinks and set them upside down and then look to Twilight and say, "Keep yer hooves out of this hole on mah sink or they'll be chopped off by the disposal motor underneath the sink that obliterates any leftover bits of food that get put through the hole. Make sure there aren't any silverware, small objects or any bones that fall down in there or it will damage the motor." I then rotate the faucet so it is over my sink and lift it up to the medium temperature position and then flip the switch up to turn it on.

Twilight turns her ears back and away from the noise coming from under the sink and stares as the water rapidly goes down in the other sink, followed by the one she is in front of. She then looks over at the hole and says, "Wow that is very interesting, so where does all this water go then?"

I turn it off and then use my hands to wash the sides of the sink clean and say, "It all goes to a septic tank on my property which has to be pumped when it gets too full. Come with me, ah have some stuff that the scientists need to develop asap."

Next Chapter: Chapter 12: The Welcome to Ponyville and Equestria Party: Part 1 Estimated time remaining: 15 Hours, 53 Minutes