Dear Denizens of the Other World,
About once a year, strange stuff happens and we have to save Equestria. This time was different, and my friends and I are still not sure we did the right thing.
We are safe and sound, so please do not worry about us.
If you are reading this, then you are probably safe. If you begin noticing symptoms like acute self-consciousness, causal inconsistencies, and existential paranoia, we wish you good luck. We hope you handle it better than we did. Reading our story may help.
Otherwise, I would like to add a personal note. It is both very flattering and a little disturbing that you think of us so much. Take good care of yourselves, and do your best to be there for your friends.
Sincerely,
Twilight Sparkle