https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0n4f-xwC-6M

Gentler had his paws thrust in his pockets. He'd left his greaves and gauntlets back at home in his room, and wore a pair of old moccasins he'd left behind for years but were still durable and fit well. His paws were tucked away in the new-old cloak, a forest green in color like a detective's trenchcoat. Pockets sewn into the sides subtly, giving it a modern-ish flair. On his legs were a pair of leggings that were ruffled around the thighs with a deep, black-ish azure hue. His chest covered by a simplistic long-sleeve top with far more elegant leather chest armor overlaid. The leather was dyed black, and the cloth under it had the same saturated color as his pants. It had been a long time since he'd worn the formal soldier's clothing that was a hand-me-down from his father, yet it still felt comfortable and hit all the right crevices, showing off his muscular figure. Faith had called the tabby handsome. And with his twisted, crooked whiskers he did indeed look handsome. Battle-worn compared to all the sheltered Abyssinians around him, but still handsome.

Faith wore one of Gentler's sister's old forest green mantles, buckled at the chest with a silver ring and spike. The ring was ornate. Old, appropriated kirin patterns were etched into the shimmering metal. The fabric was a mix, mostly cotton, insulated with fleece. It cascaded over her barrel, having some firm rigidity to it that kept it from draping so much as billow a bit. Giving it a faint sense of volume, and making Faith appear more regal than she was. It went well with her sky blue coat of fur, making it brighter by complementing it, though it dulled the color in her eyes. The best part though, was how it contrasted with her pink and silver mane, bringing out the laurel braids and everything else that made her look like a princess. Her age barely came through, despite the crow's feet in her eyes. She looked almost... royal. Like a noble. And that was not lost on the populace forced to do a double take from seeing the mare walk down the streets.

It helped that she looked even more formal due to the ferronnière encircling her forehead, made up of thin silver chain links polished to a shine, and a sunburst faceted pink topaz inset in the middle that matched her hair.

“Remember what I said please, Faith,” Gentler whispered. “No preaching while we're here in Abyssinia.”

“You never really explained why.” Faith nudged Gentler's hip with an elbow. “You embarrassed to be around me?”

Gentler rolled his shoulders, letting the tease tumble off of him like water. “Nah. We all get together and do it for your birthday, and I know you know that.” He threw her a grin, his lemon eyes contrasting with the formal wear, while melting together with the cloak. “It's because you can potentially get in trouble.”

Faith nodded once, closing her eyes. “Alright, if you're sure. I'll keep a low profile just for now. I don't want to get us kicked out after all.”

“Thank you,” Gentler responded, patting Faith on the head with a bare paw and tracing down her neck.

Anyone else would have gotten bucked for the touch due to how demeaning it was to be pat on the head by someone taller than you (in Faith's opinion at least), but she knew Gentler was just showing affection and appreciation. Which was rare for him. He normally only did so when he was incredibly drunk. And even then he was obstinate and loud, often tying things around his forehead like it was a sweatband. “No problem. Just remember your manners around me Sir Gentler Stoic.” There was a chastising, provocative tone to her voice. They were wandering around Abyssinia, heading to the ice cream shop to get a couple treats for them.

In the ice cream shop Gentler spoke about the history of Panthera, ending every impressive factoid with 'true story' as if to draw her ire or make her more amused. “Hey, Faith, anyone ever told you that you'd look sexy in a nun outfit?”

Faith chortled. “Don't put the cart before the pony loverboy. You're not getting any of this that easily.”

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SU354JZ1XXw

Gentler and Faith sat together, near each other, on top of a large branching clocktower that had been designed such that its arching branches had little clock faces of their own that represented the times in other areas of the world. They twisted and turned like some kind of surrealist architecture, stable for some reason that Gentler couldn't explain. Behind the two was the door into the tower proper that they'd come from. Every hour that passed, the main tower chimed with a shifting tune drawing out a melody every Abyssinian had been familiar with since birth for decades. Something every domestic cat had etched in their DNA. Gentler held an ice cream milkshake filled with strawberry and mint with little chocolate chips sprinkled in and chopped up, while Faith carried a waffle cone with two scoops of different fruity sorbets, one scoop of cookie crumble, and another scoop of mint fudge ribbon. The mare licked hers and occasionally munched, while the tomcat slurped his drink, chewing on the chocolate chips that came up the straw into his mouth.

“So what exactly aroused your highness to such a big, powerful dragon?” Gentler badgered Faith with the sarcastic, yet sincere question before sucking on his straw.

Faith hummed, narrowing her eyes as they looked out to the blue, untainted sky, sun bearing on them like they were in the tropics. They could see the whole side of this city. The sea was to the left of them, and the untamed rainforests plus the snow-capped mountains were to the right of them. Behind them and ahead of them were roads leading out of the city to other places in Abyssinia. “When I first met him, I saw only his raw, untameable strength and capability.” She licked her ice cream, every single scoop that melted together. “His smoldering emotion, ready to flare up like his flame breath, spoke to me. I saw someone who was always in control of everything around him, someone who didn't need a mother, but a confidant.” She simpered lightly, thinking back on good times. She had no explicit regrets, just actions she wished had been enough.

“Someone I could swap ideas with,” Faith continued after a moment. “I was able to rely on him a little more than I liked, but that's what happens when you're in a relationship, when you can depend on each other and put your life in each other's hooves.” She shrugged, and nibbled on the top-most scoop, pulling off a soft chunk. “You begin to fall into their embrace and dance with them emotionally, socially, mentally. Physically. You become part of their life, and their life part of yours.” Faith was quiet for a few moments as the sound of exotic birds flittered closer to the city heights. “To be honest I still have feelings for him on a physical level, despite feeling like he betrayed me.”

Gentler stared down at the city, shlucking his shake. “Why's that?”

Faith chuckled, tilting her head from side to side in amusement. “It's obvious, I'm sure. I remember what he was like in bed, and how I was one of the few who could truly handle him and his vigor, even if it sometimes meant riding him like a cowgirl.” Faith shuddered from the memory, her mouth twitching and twisting into an aroused snarl. “Why haven't you settled down with anyone yet, Gentler?”

Gentler lifted a shoulder, looking out lazily to the horizon. “I don't know. Just looking for the right woman. Someone who fits my emotional needs without being overbearing or belittling me, thinking I can't take care of myself. You'd be surprised at just how many equines out there are subconsciously xenophobic or prejudiced, and no one here was able to hold my interest.” He shifted in place, holding the Regal Robin shake in his firm grip. “I want someone who adds to me, not completes me. But is also morally upright. There haven't been many like that. Relationships are fickle things as I'm sure you've found. And usually they're based primarily on physical attraction. Good sex isn't everything as you also found.” The cat shot Faith a wink.

Faith just murmured agreement. She knew Gentler was merely antagonizing her to get a rise. He did it often. It was their little game. Faith was more than keen to it by this point. They both knew Drax wasn't quite just a physical attraction. “I'd give Drax another chance if he was willing to work on himself again. Perfection is an unattainable ideal and we all fall short, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't keep trying. Relationships are the same way.”

Gentler nodded, leaning to one side, toward Faith. “Speaking of perfection, you ever been to a strip club? There are tomcats and 'queens' there. You might find a body type you like. I got some money to spend. You interested in seeing the underbelly of the city?”

Faith slyly glanced at Gentler. “After we finish our ice cream, sweetie.” She sounded like she was speaking down to a child.

Gentler just snickered as they finished their ice cream. There was a small lull in conversation, until the two discussed their sexuality, when they'd discovered that part of themselves, aspects of their gender identity. Gentler was defiantly masculine, with some feminine traits as far as he saw himself, though he didn't like thinking about it much, whereas Faith saw herself in an almost non-binary light, even though they both saw themselves as parental figures to Fear and Acrid. The conversation got a little deeper as they finished their ice cream, about the nature of sexuality.

==========================================================================================

The two had made their way to a strip club called The Scratching Post, full of various sex workers. In it Faith had demonstrated a fondness for masculine traits and musculature, whether it be on the butch queens or the manly tomcats. She was bisexual, but only into masculinity whatever form it took on a species. The area was covered in shadows with dark, spinning strobe lights. The place was rowdy and full of enticed howls, with paper bills being stuck between panties and bras as clothing was taken off and the employees got almost close enough to touch. Faith and Gentler sat at a table drinking non-alcoholic mixed drinks. Gentler something strong, fizzy, and bitter, Faith something more fruity and sour. Both had a little sugar sprinkled in to add a dose of sweetness. The mare spoke loud enough for only Gentler to hear above the music.

“Friendship City was simple, a little too sheltered for me. Aside from the ponies who came in from the wasteland, the place wasn't tainted per se. It had a remnant of civilization and didn't have the same harshness as the world outside of it. The interior was more bureaucratic, but not nearly as oppressive and expensive as Tenpony. It had necessities, trivialities. Nothing I needed when I was older, but everything I could've asked for to grow up healthily. It was better than growing up in the wasteland by far, where so many falter. Nowadays I just need the fulfillment in my duty to Equestria, and I get my needs met from solely that. Faith watched a burly tomcat dance across the stage, twirling around slowly and rubbing his panty clad ass up against one of the stage poles.

“I doubt you would have attached to Fear if you didn't have other needs,” Gentler analyzed.

Faith sighed audibly. “You're right. Fear gives me something else I need. Someone whose power and endurance I can rely on, something I can put my hope toward. I saw from the start how strong that colt was in his eyes. I'd seen many ponies, but none damaged quite like him. As if his psyche had been shattered and grown back like an uncontrollable cancer. When he first asked me to come with him, I'd already made my decision. He was an interesting pony, and not just because his eyes glowed. It was because he was a foal who not only approached me with kindness and awe, all on his own, but because he was friendly and did it despite being damaged and dead on his hooves. It takes someone strong of character to do merely that, to show respect to everyone they meet, especially when they've hurt, despite what's going on behind their eyes.” Faith's own eyes hooded. “I could tell from that moment he'd gone through a lot, and found something not many do. He was beginning to find his inner alicorn.”

A butch queen was lethargically, yet actively, gyrating her ass up against one of the patrons' faces for a little extra.

Faith smiled at the display from ear to ear. “I think he's much closer to that goal than I've ever been, and has only grown closer to it over time. I love my gut for telling me to join him on his journeys. He is impossibly adorable, and I can tell he'll lead me to what I'm seeking as well, and even if not, well... he'll lead me to other things I needed but never knew. What's that saying? 'Thanks, I never knew I needed this until now?' Sounds about right.” Faith turned the question around on the Abyssinian she was chatting amicably with. “Why did you join him? Similar reasons?”

“Same reasons actually,” Gentler responded with his arms crossed as he grew as aroused as Faith from all the portrayals on stage, though his favorites were the queens gallivanting about, no matter what their gender display. All he cared about was the sex, and he could always tell due to the bulge or lack thereof. “I saw the integrity in his fight with me. He was incredibly annoying at first, but in a good way. The fact that he came up to me and showed me respect, no signs of xenophobia was something I couldn't look past even though I wanted to.” Gentler tapped his claws on the table, taking a sip of his drink. “He was eager to learn about me because I was new, like kids are wont to do, rather than scared of me because I was strange. Most wasteland critters, especially the young ones, avoid the unknown. I know for a fact Fear's the kind of pony who'd approach a zebra in the wastes despite knowing it'd potentially kill him, all because he thought they looked a little lonely sitting at their table like I did.” The cat smirked, his tail flicking to the side as he sat lazily in his chair, legs spread. “I realized he'd probably do anything for anyone, and his fight proved that even though he was so far outclassed, and he's always so hesitant to kill despite that eagerness for a good fight. Aside from trying to stab me with a hoof, he barely attacked me, even when he got desperate.”

Gentler's expression turned thoughtful as he paused, scratching his chin. “I could see he needed my help, and I also saw the hints of Friendship in him.”

Faith cast a suspicious glance at her partner. “You don't think...?”

Gentler's face turned serious, eyes contracting. “I do. He's growing into the role of Magic quickly. Every experience he has gives him, what you'd call, the inner alicorn. It's not just his changeling nature that makes him develop so fast, it's also his soul. Of course I would never tell him this. He needs to find out all of that for himself. It's more meaningful when he realizes it, rather than when someone tells him. He probably wouldn't believe it anyway.” Gentler threw his hands into the air, letting out a bark of laughter. “Besides, he needs to keep a light head on his shoulders, and I don't think my thoughts about his heroics would help him with that.”

Faith grinned wryly. “We both saw a lot in him huh?”

“Yeah, we did. He hit all our right buttons. He was what we both needed, even though we didn't know how much at the time.” Gentler leaned back, and they began to gossip about the best features on each of the cats who came out to dance. Occasionally ruminating and theorizing about their virtues, and the virtues of those around them.

==========================================================================================

Faith and Gentler hung out next to the training grounds near the Abyssinian bootcamp in the city, passing by training dummies, equipment, racing track, and many other materials meant for pulling the best out of a cat's potential, like rampant obstacle courses made to look like mini castles, forests, and mountains. It was the most action most Abyssinians would see, and most of the dangerous areas were covered by chain link fences to keep projectiles from getting flung at passerby.

Gentler threw his arms into the air as he spoke. “It was brutal and egregious. I constantly worked out, always running and stretching multiple times a day until my body was ready to give out, using specialized gems to enhance my workout routine. It was far worse than what we put Fear through, but that was solely because he wasn't an earth pony, nor a feline who could handle the extra exertion, without the proper gems for weight training and the like.” He shook his head wildly, grinning victoriously. “His field was magic, it always has been. So many sit ups, crunches of various sorts, push ups – one-handed and knuckles, sometimes one finger. Pull ups. Various fighting styles. I put myself through so much just to prepare myself for the wasteland in my off time. I was always worn out to the point of going comatose by the end, could barely walk home let alone do my day job. So many reps, so many times, so many hours put into training my body to prep for that mission I knew in my gut. I followed my soul even when it all seemed bleak.”

Faith whistled. “Wow, you knew from the beginning huh?”

Gentler shook his head again, this time more subdued as they passed by another arena, then headed up some stairs to weapons' training, weapons that were more in line with the Wasteland. “Nah, it wasn't something I knew from the very beginning. It was when I saw a clipping in the newspaper about a charity trip to the wasteland that had gone south and been canceled. They were going to bring gems and farming implements in order to try and overcome the radiation and taint, but....”

“But...?” Faith prodded.

“It didn't work out.” Gentler sounded more frustrated than he had ever been in front of any of them. “I realized it was my dream in life to do what they couldn't, even if I didn't know how. And I knew, in my heart of hearts, that the answer to all those problems laid somewhere in Equestria, one way or another. Possibly in the virtues Abyssinia had studied alongside outer space.”

“What, like some kind of sixth sense?” The mare queried.

“No,” Gentler disagreed. “I think it was more than that. I think it was planned. I could've deviated if I wanted to, I know that now. There are multiple timelines out there and I highly doubt my presence in Equestria was a destined constant like Fear says some events are.” He crossed his arms over his chest, muzzle scrunched up deep in thought. “I think it was an important facet of my soul, something I was meant to do and learn from especially. I wanted to quit many times like I said, but also while I was in Equestria. Figured sometimes I'd made the wrong decision and my gut had led me astray. But meeting Fear parted all the clouds when I saw his glowing eyes. I didn't know for sure but it all felt like a sign. I just knew even though I was loathe to accept it because of how I was doing at the time.”

Faith chuckled. “For someone who's literally named Stoic, you certainly do follow your intuition a lot.” Her voice was demure and provocative, turning the tables for a moment.

“Well yeah, sometimes you just gotta follow your heart. It knows things you could never fully know. And like the colt's mother taught him, if ever there's confusing input, just flip a coin. If you don't like the result, you know what you really want to do.” Gentler concluded.

“Hmm... I suppose you're right. You worked really hard,” Faith conceded.

“Meditation too,” Gentler added.

“Hm?”

“I used meditation in order to clear my head and find guidance in the smallest of things. My family has always talked about how we have ancestral guides that speak to us when we're confused, so long as we clear our minds. I trained hard, but when I got to Equestria I figured my guide had abandoned me. Everything was foggy, but I realize now it was just a test of my mettle. Or something like that. Something I had to discover for myself in order to grow.”

Gentler ended off the tour by showing off his skill with some magical energy weapons. Both ones that were just gemmed melee weapons, and others that were projectiles. The targets he fired at were specially designed to only suffer burn marks instead of completely vaporize from the emissions. The two flirted with each other about feline emissions, with Faith ending it off by mentioning she didn't get to orgasm as much as she liked, but it was fine, a little denial was fun, fuzzy, warm, intoxicating. Climaxing usually made her dizzy and numbed her thighs.

==========================================================================================

Faith and Gentler sat together, with the cat's hands in his lap, legs crossed, and the mare on her haunches, head held up to the breeze. They were in the palace garden, the public section. Someone was playing a Hang steel drum in the distance to give an oriental air, though not for that specific reason. The whole place was decorated akin to what Mistmane would have produced in her time alive.

“Well,” Gentler spoke, “you already know how I was the youngest kitten in my litter, even if it was only by a few seconds. I always acted and was treated like it, but also had a higher sense of self than the others. I would've been an artist barely scraping by in my attempts to get us to help Equestria, most likely, if I hadn't sought to go there directly. I was picked on a lot, and grew a stubborn, stoic facade to hide it.”

“That explains that,” Faith murmured.

“Yeah. The rest of my family had aspects of stoicism for various reasons, whether it's because it was a lifestyle or because they're genuinely apathetic. While Skyler was genuinely an asshole because he did a lot of things that got us all in trouble, nowadays our parents know better. But for awhile he was the favorite because it seemed like he never did anything wrong. But we all know now the kinds of things he did to get ahead. He's not just a lucky sob, he's also merciless.”

Faith 'wow'ed.

“Yeah. And also yeah, I've always been highly emotional and intuitive deep down, but I put on a mask to hide it. It's how I operate. What about you? You grew up an orphan in a world of orphans. What was that like?” Gentler took on a solid, quiet countenance as they sat together in the fresh, warm air.

“I've talked a little about it, but I never went in depth. Everyone around me had their own personalities that developed over time from learning of the equines around us. Some of us adopted traits of our favorite ponies, like greed or altruism, anything and everything, while others developed our own qualities from the books we read. Teachings we absorbed. Or the hobbies we discovered. A lot of us took awhile to find our cutiemark, and others molded into theirs easily and quickly. I was one of them.” Faith smiled silently. “I loved scouring the city for things to fix, what little I could. But it was a smaller aspect of a greater wish lingering in my heart. While most accept the wasteland for what it is, I wanted to make it better, but I never knew how. I latched onto preaching as the only way I could think of to bring about harmony. I know now there were other options, like going into business and having a generous, sacrificial heart. But oh well. Obviously it never quite worked out and I was a failure in my endeavors.”

Gentler's face didn't move an inch. “You're not a failure, Faith.”

“Thanks, but I don't believe it.” Faith's voice felt like a spear. “I couldn't ever impact others on the level I wanted to, even though I used to constantly assure Fear it's okay to settle for small things, and that small things build up into a lot. His father and I both.”

“So you feel like your tiny things never built up into much?” Gentler asked.

“Yeah. I rarely ever get to see the fruits of my labors, and usually it's not a huge impact. It's just sad, I'm sure most ponies I preach to end up dying due to my words.” Faith's face screwed up in self doubt.

Gentler smiled. “As long as they die peacefully. Maybe they would have died whether or not you helped them see things from a different perspective? You can't genuinely know that. You grew up trying to fix it all, and you grew up to be what you wanted. All any one of us can ask of you is that you do your best when it counts. You're obviously doing your best by Fear and Acrid.”

“Hmm,” Faith murmured. “Yes. I see them as the foals I never got to have, and probably never will have since I seem to always be attracted to a species not my own.” That brought a grin out of the preacher. She shrugged. “It's not that big a deal. I'm happy being their mother figure. There's a lot they need to figure out on their own though, just like I did. They're in this world together, it was good timing that they came into each other's lives. I personally don't think we should interfere in their journeys very much, just try to be allies. Acrid could end up being Magic too after all.”

“What? You think we should just let them go it alone? Fight their battles themselves?” Gentler sounded confused and concerned for a moment.

“Not really what I mean. I think we're just supposed to be advisors, and helpers. I think our time will come soon enough when we can be together with whoever we want to love for the rest of our lives, or whatever it is that'll make us happy in the end. After all, our lives may assist the two of them, but our lives do not revolve around them. We have our own stories to tell. Our own experiences to endure. And our own happiness to find.”

Gentler spoke in agreement. “That's kind of how I look at it too,” he admitted. “I feel like I'm in the right place at the right time, or at least this me is. I feel content, and like eventually I'm going to get the chance to do what I want to do, what I need to do. We grew up from young rascals always running around from place to place, all the way to this. I endured teasing and hardships, and healing from it provided the callouses I needed to survive the wasteland. While you found your higher calling and did what you could, even when I couldn’t find my purpose for the longest time, we both tried to make ourselves useful however we could. I did it by scavenging and taking out evil ponies, and you by preaching your heart out about what you felt would make the world a better place.

A pause.

“And it has, Faith. We've both made the world a little better with our actions, I'm sure. And we're not done yet.”

The discussion twisted around from their two charges to Faith's desire for an actual family, Gentler's desire for freedom, and what those two ideals meant to them. Both had experienced the other's wishes, in one way or another, and they both concluded they were fine where they were. It was nice to strive for the others' state, but they were content with where they were at in the end. They'd let the future come to them, wouldn't take any action to force the world's hand in this situation.

==========================================================================================

Gentler and Faith sat on a hill overlooking the oncoming sunset. They had a bottle of old vintage wine sitting between them, uncorked. It had once been contained in a casket for years, so it had the subtle flavors of the wood it was contained in, as well as a bit of caramel. Faith was playfully demure and coy while they spoke of what they looked for in a partner.

“Someone strong, handsome, capable. Sees me as an equal and not a prize to be won. Lets me have my space, isn't insecure. Knows themselves well and lets everyone know it. Maybe a little arrogant at times so I can put them in their place. Friendly, romantic banter. Appreciates me for who I am, and respects me for my goals in life. Understands that nice things aren't everything you need. A heroic soul taking on the world if it calls for it. Willing to stand by each other even when the world stands against us. Doesn't rely on me all the time for all their needs, but comes to me when they have no one else. Loose, flexible, leadership qualities. Either emotional or stoic, doesn't matter, as long as they're smoldering in all the right ways. Just ready to leap into action. Charismatic, able to rally others to their cause or, otherwise, pull strings to get others to listen and follow. A bleeding heart only if they don't expect me to pick up the pieces every single time – I don't want to be the mother to my significant other. Someone who follows my orders in the bedroom, but isn't adverse to taking command if I'm feeling a little submissive. Someone who stands on equal hooving with me everywhere else, someone who likes to discuss and weigh options, who listens to logic and reason.” Faith took a sip from her glass of wine and looked to Gentler, swirling it around. “You?”

“Similar,” he said with a shrug in his voice. “Powerful, capable. Knows herself and what she wants, seeks it out with all her heart. Passive or aggressive doesn't matter so long as she knows how to seize opportunity when it presents itself. Looking to heal the wastes in any way she can, to better any difficult situation she comes across. Able to do anything she sets her mind to, doesn't need to rely on cheap tricks to get the job done. Maybe a little honorable, within reason. Someone who could've been a knight or a soldier. Is willing to go without for long periods of time without complaining if it means the future will be better. Someone who can stick by my side through thick and thin, someone I can trust my life in the hands of, and doesn't mind me getting all my needs met elsewhere. Who accepts I'm a tomcat through and through that can't fully be tamed. Controlling, but only in the bedroom. Nowhere else. Someone who prefers simplicity over extravagance. A woman who knows how to keep a level head on her shoulders in the worst of times. I guess... someone like you Faith.” He huh'ed insincerely.

Faith ignored the feelings it stirred as she downed her glass. “I'll consider your proposition, loverboy. No guarantees. This might not have been a date but I guess it turned into one in the end.”

Getting the hint, Gentler changed the subject. “You ever... feel envious of Fear? I don't dare tell him I feel that way sometimes.”

“Yes,” she responded. “But I'm at peace with it.”

Gentler lidded his eyes, tilting his chin up and drinking some wine before pouring themselves a second glass. “I'm secretly envious of him. I don't feel like we're all equal to each other. That bothers me sometimes. But I know he must've felt that way toward me for awhile.”

“You're right, we're not,” Faith murmured, taking another sip. “Fear has surpassed us in development and strength in a sense. He's taken all we taught him and made it his own. In reality, there's probably nothing left for us to help him with. He's not only on the way to incarnating his own inner alicorn, whatever the end result consists of, I'm not sure. But he's also so strong we barely even matter.”

Gentler hummed. “Then again our specific skill sets were good for helping take down the Overvalkying.”

“That's true,” Faith admitted. “He also needs us a lot as emotional support. He appreciates our presence more than I'm sure he could ever explain. We're not useless so I don't worry about it much. We'll be there to pick up his slack.”

“Still,” Gentler sighed, shifting on his hands and rocking from side to side, leaning back. “It'd be nice to be on his level. Maybe I should ask him to teach me shadow walking sometime? Maybe it'd make me feel better about myself.”

“Well...” Faith chirped. “I think even if you can't learn it you should ask. Part of developing as a creature is teaching others what you've learned, and if he can't be a teacher as well as a guide, then he can't fully blossom into his own. He needs to have all kinds of experiences, if you're right about his blooming virtue.”

Gentler smiled gently, eyes at half mast. “I suppose you're right. I knew that little fluffnugget was going to be something important. I have no idea how, but there are stories about how important Friendship and Magic was back in pre-war Equestria. How it could defeat the hardest of villains. I don't know what his end result is going to be, like you said, but it's gotta be something pretty mystical and important, right?”

“Well, they say Twilight grew into the element of magic, and remained a unicorn, and she was the leader of one of the most prestigious ministries, so if he's given the supplies he needs I'm sure it will be,” Faith responded.

“Hah,” Gentler barked, “you don't think Fear's going to become corrupt and rule us all like the ministries ruled you guys, yeah?”

Faith bat a hoof, sipping her drink. “I highly doubt it. Fear might've seen a future like that, but the current him doesn't have that in him. Besides, his sister was in the future he saw... unless she came back to life in his vision in order to do away with him... it's not gonna happen. Let's not let our envy turn into irrational discontent, okay?”

Gentler nodded. “For sure. Fear tries his best to help us. It'd be wrong for us to go after him on some vague discomfort that he'd turn evil. We don't need to prep for the worst case scenario with him.”

The two toasted each other to the ideal, and mused together about Acrid's past and future, and what it meant for his developing personality and virtue. The future, their future, was uncertain, but they decided they were both looking forward to it, clinking glasses one more time as they finished off the bottle, barely tipsy, and headed back home, Gentler mentioning favorite bands, and Faith talking about novels she'd read.

==========================================================================================

Gentler was a little surprised to see Fear and Acrid both back before they arrived. The former was drunk and taking a throbbingly cold shower, while Acrid listened intently to Salmon Stoic rambling on about his job as a fisherman, and Faith chose to help Clairity Stoic in the kitchen with their nightly meal. The youngest Abyssinian of the three in the house chose to go see Fear in the bathroom.

“Hey, Fear, you there?”

Fear's voice was silent for a few moments, just the sound of raging water coming from behind the seafood-themed shower curtain. It sounded like icy needles splattering against ceramic. “Ye'h?” Fear's voice was dull and sounded like he had a hangover already. An agonized voice that regretted life and past decisions. Almost nasally. It wasn't often the young stallion sounded so vulnerable and hurt.

“I had a question for you, if you don't mind.”

“Wouldn't your parents... uhh... chastise you for coming in on others like this?” There was a dry, sarcastic, cutting edge to his voice as his silhouette sat on his haunches in the tub. “I thought the bathroom was a sacred... ow... place?”

Gentler snrrked, keeping his voice to a low whisper. Loud enough for Fear to hear, but not enough to send pangs rocking through his head. “It's not often I hear this side of you Fear. It's a welcome reprieve.”

Fear stood up on his haunches and stretched his forelegs over his head until they were quivering from strain, letting out a sigh. “Ahhhhhg hnnnh... hmf.” Fear smacked his lips, eyes lidded. His silhouette morphed again as he looked through the curtain to his guest. “I feel better than I have in awhile, and also worse than I have in awhile. What do you want Gentler?”

“Huh. This is also the most relaxed I've heard you in a long time.” He shrugged, uncrossing his legs and ceasing leaning on the door frame, stepping into the bathroom proper, closing the door behind him with a heel, and flopping down on the toilet, leaning on his elbows on his knees. “Acrid reveal his feelings to you?”

Fear's voice cut through the sound of water. “He doesn't need to.” An ungodly sniff and snort. Not only did the young stallion sound vulnerable, he sounded gross. He'd apparently had a long, tiring day. “I know how he feels.”

“Formalities are important you know,” Gentler whispered.

“I suppose. I guess I'm ready for him to confess, but it's... hngh. Still terrifying. I'm surprised he didn't confess to me while I was more drunk.” Fear held his head with a forehoof, trying to stymie the throbbing ache in his skull, like his brain was overflowing out his ears like a cancerous growth.

“Your changeling-ness really does speed up your metabolism huh?”

“Eh.” Fear shrugged audibly. “It's not as bad as it could've been. The cats at the wine tasting gave us some food to help absorb the alcohol.” Fear looked up at the ceiling, closing his eyes. The light hurt the front of his skull. There was no way he could fight in this state.

“Well that's good,” Gentler confirmed, fiddling with his paws. “It's good you're taking care of yourself Fear.”

“Thanks, Dad.” Fear sarcastically spat.

Gentler chuckled. “Closer than you think.”

Fear grinned behind the curtain. “I know. You're like a second father to me. But also one of my best friends. So thanks... for that.”

Gentler held his hands against his mouth. “No problem Fear.”

“So what are you in here for,” the young stallion asked. “Nice clothes by the way. You're really styling today.”

Gentler looked down at himself, at his leather armor, pants, and cloak. The colors mingled well. Brought out his eyes in an odd way. As if they were charged with the kind of electricity or fire you could only get from a lemon. “Huh. You rascal. Are you morphing your eyes to see through the curtain?”

Fear snuffled again as if he was sucking brain up into his snout. “Something like that. I'm talented, remember? No point in... ugh, letting myself be completely defenseless. You know?”

Another bark of laughter from Gentler, sitting up and slapping his knee. “You get more impressive every day I'm around you. Ugh. That's exactly why I came to talk to you.”

Fear's ears visibly perked up behind the curtain, having been flat against his skull until now. “Is that so...?” He queried, softly intrigued.

“Yeah.” Gentler shook his head, rocking on his knees. “Yeah I wanted to ask you. Can you teach me shadow walking?”

“Oh? Does Dad feel like his foal is surpassing him?”

“Seriously, Fear.” Gentler's voice had a sharp edge to it. Curt. Unamused. “I know you can feel my... emotions. Should've realized it sooner to be honest. I guess that one's on me. Thought I was keeping it secret.”

Fear sighed, looking down at the tub. “It's alright Gentler. I don't broadcast everything I notice. It's none of my business how you feel about me. If you wanted to confront me about it you would've. I don't blame you for feeling the way you do, even if I think you're wrong.”

There was a pause.

“You can't feel my emotions,” Fear continued, “but I respect you a lot. You're an incredible feline. I don't personally think you need me to teach you anything, because everything you have, everything you are, feels like so much more than I could ever be.”

Gentler was frustrated at Fear's modesty, grimacing tightly and staring at the ground, clenching his fingers against his palms. He wanted to lash out, but he kept his voice even, stoic. “That may be true, Fear. But I want to better myself like you have. I've stayed... 'stagnant' long enough. It's time I had a one-up over new opponents.”

Fear squeezed his eyes shut, huffing, not in frustration but in acceptance. “You're right, I'm sorry. Thank you for keeping your cool. No matter what my reasoning was, it's wrong of me to decline your request. I'm glad you didn't yell at me Gentler.”

Gentler shrugged, his face neutral, eyes hooded. “Likewise.”

“I'll teach you,” Fear continued. “If I can. I can't guarantee results but I think even an Abyssinian could learn it if I do some... tweaking to how it's done. Luna calls me clever but she doesn't know the full extent.”

Gentler's tone became scandalous. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” Fear ugly sniffed again. “When I'm not anxious I can come up with all manner of things. When I'm anxious I become completely stupid.” Fear shrugged. “I've been thinking about how others could use magics similar to me. I don't think it's fair for me to keep it all to myself. You know how it is. This knowledge should be spread among everyone I love. Everyone I meet. So they can defend themselves.”

“Hah,” Gentler barked. “Not too bad. But you're misguided. You can't give that to just anyone. Not everyone's as trustworthy as you Fear.” His voice was hesitant, afraid. “You shouldn't just go around giving everything to everyone. That's how...”

Fear interrupted, looking up. “Yeah I know. How Fluttershy ended up causing trouble for everyone, spreading the magitech of megaspells.” Fear paused. “Sorry for interrupting. It's just frustrating knowing I have all of this and I can't just give it away.”

“Even if you did, Fear, it would up the battle ante. It'd be dangerous. It'd make some safer, but it'd make others more dangerous. I know you know that.” Gentler's paws clasped together.

Fear nodded once. “Indeed. It's frustrating but I do know. And I will teach you Gentler. I think I know how. All I have to do is tap you into a certain wavelength. Then you might be able to recreate it. I have no clue. But I'm willing to try.”

Gentler stood up. “It's okay if you can't. The willingness to try is enough. Thank you.” Gentler's gaze lifted and he glared at the wall. “Enjoy the rest of your shower. Enjoy some hot water while you're at it. You're not in there just to sober up. Relax a little.”

And with that Gentler left the bathroom to get some improvised pajamas for Fear so he could live in style for a night.

Dinner was delicious, Fear decided both ahead of time and in hindsight. Not only did it smell potent and palpable, with so many different aromas, but it was also amazing taste and texture-wise. The main course was chili mac: squishy kidney beans, juicy tomato sauce, a hot beefy broth, steaming elbow noodles, shredded sharp-tasting cheddar cheese all mixed together into a glorious amalgamation. A side of toasted, buttered garlic bread that was also steaming underneath the small towel placed on the basket they were in. There was a plate of seasoned pork tenderloin cut into thin delicious segments that were brown around the edges, basted to perfection – absolutely soaked – in a salty vinegar sauce with a fruity wine aftertaste, with a little parsley to balance out the flavor. Next to it was a plate of squishy broccoli slathered in virgin oil roasted to a crisp. There was so much there was enough for leftovers, so the guests could continue enjoying a warmed up meal. For dessert there'd been creamy ice cream inundated in molten chocolate syrup, buried in both warm, ripe banana slices and chewy nuts.

Fear, Faith, and Acrid had never eaten so well, even with some of the best MREs out there. Fear had come across a skywagon full of crates containing a haul of them once, and they didn't come close to this no matter how much better those were than canned food. Chili MREs didn't compare. Burger, taco, burritos, jam and biscuit, pizza MREs, none of them came close to comparing to a fresh home-cooked meal by a skilled chef. The instant drinks contained in those meals were nothing like the real, tangy fruit drinks they'd been provided, with their subtle yet distinct flavors. Fear could never stop thanking Clairity. Honestly, even the instant meal's floral chocolates couldn't compare to the fresh candies in this country. This place really was, in a way, almost paradise.

After it was all said and done, Fear decided he wanted to get some fresh air, maybe sleep out in nature. He felt like he couldn't be cooped up for long, so he took his sleeping bag and temporary plaid button-up jammies with him, the loose fabric keeping him warm, and headed out to a location Gentler had recommended to him. Partly it was because he wanted some time alone to think about Acrid, without being near him, and also because he wanted to just be... alone. Away from everyone. Think about his life, his future, where he was going. About the zebras he was either going to negotiate with or fight. About how he was going to train Gentler, and maybe one day others depending on how Gentler took to the teaching. He also thought about his past, a bit of it still bothering him even after all this time. Trauma took a long time to get over, no matter what that trauma was.

He wouldn't get the loneliness he'd wanted though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F0-q1jeReY

Fear hung out in the park at night, having gotten through without getting wet by shielding himself with a field of telekinesis. Didn't take much strength to push away droplets of water spraying from activated sprinklers. He'd chosen a spot on the hill, looking out at the trees covering the grassy ground, an area already dowsed. He wielded Shaybna to dry off the water on the ground by radiating heat from the blade, turning the drops into steam. One night wouldn't be too big a deal, and it had already soaked into the dirt. Fear put his sleeping bag on the ground, and sat next to it, sliding his sword into the fabric like a second sheathe. He wasn't sure what he'd been expecting but... he definitely did not expect the stars in the sky, and the moon hanging over it all in the dark, to cast light that reflected off the liquid spraying everywhere and create a looming Lunar Rainbow that twisted and smeared across the landscape like a blanket. It was idyllic, and he knew then he'd chosen the right spot.

Fear pulled his mother's rifle up next to him, casually disassembling it with telekinesis, all the while thinking about how his life was made up of the same synchronous parts that made up his rifle. His past, his present, his future, all conglomerated into one big meaningful whole, shooting out a bullet that would cast out into existence and probably plant a seed. A seed of creation. That was his life. Fear let out a sigh as he gazed over the pieces. No cracks in the bridge or receiver. Still finely polished from last time. Discolored, like him, but perfect. A successful tilt test later, he put the rest back together, components sliding into place and clicking together symphonically. He yanked back the bolt, releasing an illusory casing, and held it up to his eyes, staring down the sight. This is what he'd been missing in life. These times alone like when he was young and had the whole world to analyze. Fear set the rifle down, thinking on his past. It was necessary... wasn't it? To make him a finely honed weapon of creation and destruction. Of reparation. Fear breathed in deeply through his snout, letting it flow through his larynx.

And let it settle in his lungs.

He held it tight, not letting it escape, bulging out his cheeks subtly.

Did he accept the past? Everything that had happened? Would he do it all over again if it meant he could be here, now?

Yes.

He hated some of his actions.

But the more he thought about it, he wouldn't have changed it. He needed it. He just hoped Dim Nova forgave him, or would end up forgiving him. He knew life wasn’t perfect for her, not like it would have been if he'd never interfered with her life. There was no excuse for it. But he accepted it.

Fear let out the breath through his maw, coming out in a whistle.

“Is someone there?” A feminine voice called out to the young stallion. Fear glanced behind him to see who it was. So much for his time alone, he snorted.

“Yeah. Fearei Shatter. Who're you?”

An equine popped up over the ridge of the hill wearing plain saddlebags. Indigo mane and tail, wavy in nature. Dark gray fur similar to Fear's own. Their colors were similar. Blue eyes like him, but darker. The main difference was this one was 6 inches taller than him, abouts. About a head taller. Fear looked away, back toward the spectral ribbons ahead of him. “Uhh... that's a good question.” Fear's face darted to look at the confused pony again.

“What do you mean? Surely you know who you are??” Fear was equally confused.

“I mean...” The unknown equine wandered over to Fear, shaking off his coat of fur, getting water off of him, making Fear splutter and cower away. He slid his saddlebags off and to the side onto the ground away from Fear. “It's always changing. What I like to be called I mean. My name is Vivid Daylight but I go by Davie or Vivian sometimes.” He shrugged, laying down next to Fear without requesting permission. Fear huffed.

“You're invading my personal space a little, Davie.” Fear grunted and pulled away, taking a couple steps back and yanking his sleeping bag a bit of a distance away.

“Oh, sorry about that.” Davie... Vivian... whoever was clearly sincere. And that's when Fear realized why this was so strange. Not only did the pony have a camera strung around his neck, one he wasn't familiar with – a digital one – he also realized he was looking at an earth pony.

“You're not used to other equines around here, are you?” Fear put two and two together immediately. Not from the wasteland. Not familiar with a lot of equines. Sheltered. Probably sees me as a potential role model or friend. Doesn't have any reason to distrust me. It made a lot of sense.

“Uh... yeah. How'd you know?”

Fear shook his head. “It's obvious, isn't it? Not everyone just comes up to... well. Ugh. I suppose it's a little different here. It's nice to meet you Vivian. Davie... whatever.” Fear shrugged and laid down a few feet from the other, taller, equine, as he brought up his camera and started taking varied angle photos.

Silence reigned. Fear realized he should try to make conversation before this pony left. He was here to make a good first impression after all. Only... Vivid spoke first.

“I've heard about you and your friends you know. You're all over the grapevine. I was hoping I could meet you all before you left for wherever. It's not often other equines are around.”

Fear ignored him. And decided to try to strike up more comfortable conversation, to ease into the harder things. “You do a lot of photography? My Mom was always interested in that hobby.”

Davie chirped. “Yeah! It's one of my many hobbies! I actually come from a long line of guards that stayed behind in Abyssinia decades ago – lucky for us am I right? But I've never had a solid place in this city. I never got my cutiemark like everyone else does.”

“No cutie mark...?” Fear queried, before noticing that... indeed, Vivid Daylight did not have a cutiemark. The name made sense, in a way. He was certainly vivid and his flank was clear as day. Fear hummed.

“They say it was a genetic abnormality involving my destiny.” Davie continued.

“I know how that feels,” Fear responded. He really wants someone like him to talk with huh? “You wanna talk about it?”

“Only if you explain what you mean by knowing how it feels,” Vivian looked to Fear with curious eyes.

Fear was getting an intense sense of deja vu. The sheer convenience of being so similar to this pony was nauseating. “Oh... well. I was born without a destiny of my own. Any destiny. At all. No identity to call my own. It's a really long story but my father gave me a big chunk of his, so I could develop it into my own with my soul.” He shook his head. “I'd rather not get into it to be honest. It's ancient history.”

Davie nodded, grinning, looking up at the stars. “Mine is... a little different than that. It's like I have all the destiny in the world, but I just can't pick one. Like a jack of all trades.”

“Jack of all trades, master of none, is better than a master of one,” Fear murmured.

“That's how that saying goes?” The stallion asked, cocking his head to the side.

“Yeah. I have... sources. Ancient ones.” Fear twirled a hoof. “How old are you Davie?”

“Young twenties. Just getting started in life. I've never known what to really do with it, so I just lay all my options out on a chart and do a few different things a day, see which dart sticks to the wall. You know?” Vivian was tentative.

Fear nodded in understanding. “Yeah, I get that.” Huh he's way older than me. Maybe not WAY, but still. Fear tried to think back on any stories his family had told him about creatures like that. Wait, Vivian? Does he like being considered a 'she?' That's odd. Yet... relatable. Ugh. I always wanted to be a big strong stallion, and now I don't even know THAT much anymore. Fear rubbed his forehead with a hoof.

“Fear?” Vivian asked.

“What's up?”

“What's on your mind?” Davie looked to try and see under Fear's hoof. “You seem older than me, but I'm not... sure why.”

Fear shrugged lightly, cocking his head. “I can't say why. Maybe it's 'cause I'm from the Wasteland. Maybe it's because I develop faster naturally. Who can say for sure? I was just thinking about something that might help you, a story.”

“Well you don't need to tell me a story right now if you don't want to. Just let it come naturally.”

“I suppose...” Fear murmured. “Oh. I suppose there is one. But I don't know it very well. It's just about a griffon who was infatuated with ponies and their prosperity, and wanted a cutiemark of her own, but couldn't get it. So with the help of friends ultimately decided her talent would be whatever she wanted at the time. Which was mainly helping her friends, and her friends would be everyone.”

“That sounds like a nice story,” Davie agreed, “but it's clear you don't want to tell it right now. Maybe another time – before you leave Abyssinia?”

“Sure, kid. I can do that I suppose.” Fear wasn't sure why he said it, but it'd just come out like that. He looked with wide, terrified eyes at Davie only to find he was smiling and blushing.

“You certainly do talk older too. But yeah, it's not just my destiny that's always fluctuating. It's also my gender, my sexuality, everything. Nothing ever stays the same.”

Fear's eyes narrowed, brow furrowing. “You sure you're not half changeling?”

“Pretty sure,” Davie said softly. “Why?”

Fear shook his head clear. “Nah reason. Just wanted to rule out the possibility.” Guess not all changeling traits remain just a changeling's. Odd.

“So what brings you here? I'm clearly here for night photography,” Davie explained. “And I was lucky enough to catch you. But what's your reason?”

Fear laughed a little. Right place right time after all. Maybe? Fear explained his recent thoughts to Davie, about his guilt, his wonderment as to whether or not he should fully embrace the past. It's evil, but it might give him more inner peace if he did.

“Well personally,” Davie spoke, “I think imperfection is better than perfection. Our errors make us who we are. All because we struggled to achieve greatness instead of being born with it. The past may be flawed, but you grew, and the present and future are here because you earned it. Things are always changing, nothing stays the same. In the end Abyssinia too will change for better or worse. Either because we're stuffy and uptight and it leads to our downfall, or because it leads to an uprising from someone like you.”

Fear's head jerked to look at Davie, eyes bugging out in surprise. “Huh? Huh. I suppose.” It solidified some of his own thoughts. “I'm not going to let you guys have a... downfall. You don't deserve that, even if some of you are kind of... sheltered. You have so many great things here, it's not worth taking it away. I'm no raider. I'm a protector.”

Davie grinned and shifted on his belly. “You're a guide.”

Fear was dumbstruck, a little hazy. “What makes you say that?”

“I don't know. You were clearly upset by my sudden presence during your quiet time, yet you still gave me company. You let me sit around and speak with you. You let me unload, and... well. You're going to tell me a story later. You just said you were going to defend us no matter what. You sound like one of the ancestral guides from Abyssinian culture. In the right place, at the right time.”

Fear shifted, uncomfortable as he listened to Vivian speak. “I guess.” He laughed awkwardly. “Why's everyone think I'm so great?”

“Well, you seem older than me for one. And I can't quite put my hoof on all that it is.” Davie shrugged nonchalantly. “You also just.. radiate power and experience. You're young but there's something about you that draws me in.”

Fear rubbed his muzzle with a hoof, grimacing tightly. “I guess. I suppose I should learn to turn that off, or whatever.”

“I wouldn't suggest it, even if you could. I think all the best teachers in Abyssinia have the same aura you do. An aura that, while laid back and easy going, exudes and demands respect from those younger than you.”

“Pfft.” Fear rolled his eyes. “Flitter obviously wasn't moved by it, if what you say is true.”

“Not everyone is moved by auras like yours in the same way.” Davie's gaze returned to the starry sky. “Some just become a little more quiet, a little more analytical. It's something most develop from learning and studying as much as they can.”

Fear adjusted himself again. Was it similar to the Nightmare Pressure, he wondered. “You sure I shouldn't be turning whatever... this is. Off?”

“Nah. I think you should let yourself influence others actively. If you got it, you earned it. Others should follow it.”

Fear did consider himself a leader. He blew air out between his lips in a sigh. “Well, alright I guess. Gotta accept myself marks and all. I guess this is just another aspect of myself that's changed over time.”

“Everyone has that sense about them,” Davie elaborated, “when they've done important things. It sits in their subconscious and radiates from them. I hope to be that way some day by doing all I can.”

“Just don't stretch yourself too thin,” Fear warned. “I learned that the hard way.”

“See?” Davie chirped. “You are a guide. Maybe not as good as some, but you're getting there. I'll take your advice to heart, thank you.”

Fear just hummed. I suppose it doesn't matter what path in life we choose so long as we relax and make the most of it at the same time. I am who I am because of my sins, but I am not my sins. I faced opposition and my soul faltered, but it will not falter again. I'm... probably not an impostor, just a kid who fucked up. It was a bad fuck up and... I don't regret it anymore because I wouldn't trade this life for the world. Dim... forgive me. I'm still not sure yet if I'm an impostor or not, but I'm sure this is a step in the right direction.

Davie reached into his saddlebags and pulled out a pair of smoking pipes. “You wanna smoke some Merry Wing with me?”

Fear considered it, staring at the stallion with a raised eyebrow. “Sure. Grandpa told me to experiment.” Fear took one pipe in his telekinetic aura, and Davie taught him how to pack the weed down into the pipe to prepare it for smoking. Make sure to get all of it in you! Don't let a single bit of smoke escape! Fear's eyes grew misty and bloodshot immediately, but it was pretty nice being high. He'd be hungry for leftovers later but that was fine. Fear told Vivian the story about how he got his scar. The stallion was impressed.

I, like my rifle, am broken but fixed by myself and those around me. The pieces put back together. I'm going to have a pleasant night sleeping in the wilderness tonight. It's not often you get to rest in a park.

The two spent the next hour or so discussing Abyssinian science. After a small crash course in the fundamental concepts of quantum mechanics (in layman’s terms), they conversed about how magic and thought coalesced in order to bring about the creation of various phenomena based on examination and experience. In their reality, thought and mindset powered not only magic, but influenced the world around them in subtler ways.

Fear realized the main character's element in the story Drax had given to him had a basis in reality. A high discussion for high ponies. Eventually Vivid Daylight left him in peace to get some sleep.

Before going to sleep though, Fear spent some time with Shaybna speaking with her about his new, albeit only slight, clarity of mind, the feeling of returned strength, more energy, and his new feelings blossoming for Acrid. Shaybna had strong feelings about Acrid too, felt him honorable, and worthy of wielding one of the swords too if he ever found one. He was a stallion who was cowardly, but tried hard to fight against it. Not quite on the same level as Fear, but nonetheless. He just needed a little push.

Upon falling asleep, Fear spent time with Dim, catching up with her life. She'd moved to Friendship City on Fear's recommendation, and was currently living with Angel, Crate, and Bidden. While it wasn't easy to live alone in such a prestigious faux city, it was certainly much easier when together, earning money and pooling it. She was doing better, and finding herself as a good nanny for Bidden. She appreciated Fear's guidance, having decided it'd been for the best. Being in a protected city was much better than being out in the wastes proper. Even if she had to live in the slums. It wasn't like the guards around there were corrupt. They didn't stand for violence. If someone got hit they were immediately hauled off. It might've been a melting pot of various walks of life, but it was a no-nonsense place that trouble never stirred in. Dim was eclipsing her old hurts with new loves. Fear used his knowledge from his scrys with Freiya to get Dim involved with the right ponies around the settlement, including Aloe and Lotus, the OOPAs from a time before the war. Not that Fear had deigned fit to tell anyone the information he'd learned from it all, and definitely not from Minuette.

A little while before Fear left Dim, he introduced her to Omega Storm. Explaining she was a fragment of him, and an interpretation of his mother's personality (and a touch of the real thing), finally solidified into a single entity. Part of his mind that could only be acknowledged by others in dreams if he used a little magic. Dim was impressed, and wondered if Luna could teach her something like that for whenever she got lonely in her sleep. Fear encouraged her to try, informing her it wasn't real.

“They can't share information with us we don't already know at the very least in our subconscious. But it's still nice because it's real to us when we're hurting.”

Dim cooed, her squirrely cheeks a little fatty. “I'll certainly discuss it with Princess Luna. Thank you Fear for the recommendation. I won't let it take their place, but it'll be a salve.”

“Okay,” Fear chirped with a broad smile.

Fear spoke with Sim next, who was excited to see him. He elaborated on how he'd been finally relaxing lately, genuinely.

“I think you deserve it Fear.”

The young stallion was kind of thrown for a loop, and it showed on his face, looking as if he'd been slapped unexpectedly.

“You're my son, and I've watched you grow, grow, and grow. You've never asked anything major of anyone around you. Nothing you didn't immediately pay back. It's time for you to focus on yourself for a bit. Let me take you to Tenpony and Friendship someday. You already know some stuff about it, but I want to make a day of it, just between you and I. Reminisce on old times and act like the father and son we are. Like friends.”

Fear was uncertain, Sim's speech having done a number on him. “Eh. I'll think about it. Sorely tempted. It'd be nice. Especially if that Mega Mare hoodie is still in one of those clothing shops.”

“You scry too much,” Sim laughed out.

“Eh, maybe if I did I'd have known how to convince the king and queen to help the wasteland. I want to be friends with them anyway despite us being in disagreement, and them not being super respectful of my home. Maybe the future will be better if I do.”

Sim shrugged a shoulder. “It's not in us to change everyone, it's in us to change ourselves. Do it for their present, not for our future. You've done well, and your intentions are noble either way. But you should just be there for them like you would anyone else. Royalty doesn't matter in the end when we're all in danger and dying.” Sim set a hoof on Fear's shoulder.

Fear gave a firm nod. “I'll try Dad, thank you. It means a lot.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_z4c4ftKZ1Y

Some of the MREs mentioned in this chapter are inspired by this guy's reviews, including some more well-known MREs.

Also tomatoes and potatoes are poisonous to horses. But given I've been eschewing things like actual horse age and given this series deviates from the fact that horses cannot eat meat in favor of a headcanon that these ponies can, but don't get the same sustenance from it or are outright intolerant to it, I thought it'd be fine.

BR asks Gentler: Did you go through a college catnip phase?

Gentler: To be honest, I didn't go to college. I explained why to Faith even if I never explicitly stated I didn't go to college, but... I was too busy following my heart. It's amazing the masks we grow to know people by when that's not exactly who they are down in their soul. Just a facet of them they show to you. I did do catnip now and then in high school though. It's good for spicing up sex a little bit.

BR asks Acrid: What's something you miss from before the wasteland that you never thought you would?

Acrid: Oh? Lots of things. It's amazing how much you realize you took for granted, even the terrible things that upset you, when you no longer have them anymore. It teaches you a very... intense acceptance of your current worries and problems. Because you realize that maybe... if everything was stolen from you, you'd miss those too. It's probably one of the many reasons I never considered suicide when I realized I'd lost everything. But I'd say the biggest thing I regret not having anymore is the war itself. Strange, I know. But there was something comforting about it, about knowing you had a specific enemy that you needed to defeat, rather than some vague concept as a threat. Sure the Ministry of Morale turned the zebras into a sort of concept, but there was still a solid enemy, and it wasn't just a mindset that corrupted everyone. Does that make sense?