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You Think You Know Somepony

by melodic_harmony

Chapter 1: Until You Accidentally Walk In On Them Doing Stuff


“Fluttershy? I brought that book you wanted to borrow!” Twilight called out when she got to the front door. She frowned when there was no answer. Looking at the sky, she saw it was just after sunset. Fluttershy valued her sleep, she knew, but she never went to bed this early. Perhaps she forgot that Twilight would be coming around, and went out?

Well, I suppose I’ll just come in and leave the book on a table or something, where she’ll see it when she comes back, Twilight thought. That way she’ll know I came by. Having made her decision, Twilight entered the cottage, thinking she would just be in and out. Her jaw fell open as she saw what looked like a yellow pony-like figure with huge bat wings, a wild muted pink mane, and blood-red eyes hunched over the dead body of a small brown rabbit, fur matted with its blood. The creature had its fangs in the poor critter’s neck, and Twilight could clearly hear a sucking sound as the rabbit was drained of its blood.

Once done with its meal, the fanged thing wiped its mouth with a hoof, smearing the blood across its muzzle. Then their eyes met… and the creature gave off a strangely Fluttershy-like squeak as it jumped two hooves into the air.

Twilight just stood there, mouth agape. The Flutter… bat in the center of the room stared back, trembling, no doubt terrified that she’d been found out. Finally, she managed to say, “Um… t-this isn’t w-what it looks l-like?”

Twilight just blinked slowly, still too shocked to answer, or even move. Then she whipped her head around when she heard a voice from the kitchen. “Fluttershy, darling, which squirrel did you say I could eat again, the blind one, or the one with the… missing… leg…” Rarity trailed off, seeing Twilight in the front entrance. She, too, looked drastically different to what she normally looked like. Her purple mane, which was usually down, was up in a tasteful bun, her horn smooth and curved, her long fangs reaching her chin, and her eyes blood-red, like Fluttershy’s. Unlike Fluttershy, who was naked, Rarity wore a black cape, with diamond buttons, and red silk sewn into the inside. It trailed behind her, obscuring most of her back half.

Rarity chuckled nervously. “Eheheh, there’s a perfectly… reasonable explanation for what you are seeing here, heheh…” She trailed off, seeing that Twilight’s face hasn’t changed. After a few more seconds, Rarity started to get worried. She tapped Twilight on the shoulder. “Twilight?”

“Gah!” Twilight came out of her shock, and stared at the two vampires that were her friends. She looked at one, than the other, then shook her head. “G-get away from me! I can protect myself, I won’t let you drink my blood!” She bared her teeth, and her horn lit up menacingly as she flared out her wings defensively.

“No, Twilight, darling,” Rarity tried to reassure her, “it’s still us! Your friends, the ones who you met at the Summer Sun Celebration all those years ago. We’re just a bit more… bloodthirsty than you thought we were, is all.” Rarity tried for a friendly smile, but her fangs made it very hard. Fluttershy waved, smiling nervously, but said nothing.

Twilight glared at them, horn charged, but when they made no move to attack, she slowly powered it down. Her wings folded at her sides, but she still glared at them suspiciously. “How do I know you’re actually my friends?” she asked, skeptically.

“Well…” Rarity started. “Remember back at the Young Flyers Competition, when Rainbow did the Sonic Rainboom for the first time since getting her cutie mark? Well, since four of us weren’t pegasi, you wanted to cast a spell that gave us wings, and I was the test subject. It proved too hard to do more than once, so you can a cloudwalking spell on the rest of you. I was flaunting my new butterfly wings, and inevitably crashed the competition, but then flew too close to the sun, and, well…” If Rarity could blush, she would be doing so right now. “Rainbow had to save me before I fell all the way to the ground. I could have turned into my bat form, but then that would have given me away.” Twilight raised an eyebrow at that remark, but said nothing.

“Oh!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “And I was cheering so loud when she did the Rainboom, and you, Pinkie, and AJ were all staring with your mouths open, like,” She then proceeded to demonstrate, but with her chin-length fangs, it just made her look menacing. She didn’t seem to notice, though, and giggled at the memory.

Twilight scrutinized the two vampires. There was no way the could have made that up, with that much detail. There was no doubt that these were her friends. But still, how could they be…

“How are we vampires? Is that what you were going to ask?” Rarity said. “Don’t worry, I asked the same question when I found out about Fluttershy. Well, I became a vampire when I was bitten by a rogue one while looking for gemstones near the Everfree Forest. Apparently, some lone ones live there, preying on whatever they can catch. Fortunately, I wasn’t sucked dry, as Fluttershy was nearby and heard me scream, and fought off the other vampire, then brought me to her home and treated me. The venom was already at work, and there is no cure for vampirism. So dear Fluttershy here taught all there is to know about vampires, how to control oneself, and how to transform into my pony disguise to live in the town.” Rarity’s body morphed as her coat became brighter, her fangs retracted into her mouth, her horn straightened out, and her eyes turned back into their familiar sapphire blue color. Fluttershy did the same, turning back into her pegasus self.

“Unfortunately, she can’t turn into a bat like I can, so I had to learn that skill from Zecora. She knows several unicorn vampires in the forest,” she added, seeing Twilight’s confused expression.

“I was bitten when I was still living in Cloudsdale,” Fluttershy started. “I was still living with my parents, and that first night, I was so… thirsty, I almost drank my whole family dry. With Zephyr, I was really tempted,” she added, giggling. Twilight snickered as she remembered the annoying pegasus that was Fluttershy’s brother.

“I didn’t want to hurt anypony, so I moved to Ponyville as soon as I could. Of course, the creatures on the ground fascinated me, but my vampirism was the main reason for moving. Then, not too long after, I found Rarity, and, well, you know the rest.” She hid behind her mane. Twilight couldn’t see this sweet little thing that was Fluttershy be any kind of blood-sucking monster, despite seeing her do just that mere minutes ago.

Rarity wrapped a foreleg around her friend, continuing for her. “We only eat animals, Twilight, don’t worry. Neither of us have tasted pony blood in our lives! And even then, we only eat animals that want to die, which is where Fluttershy’s ability to communicate with animals comes in handy. So you see, Twilight, dear, no innocent creatures are drained without their consent when we feed. You have nothing to worry about, darling.” Rarity smiled warmly.

Twilight blinked, then smiled back. “Well, I suppose it’s all right, as long as no pony dies. I can’t promise you that your… unique dietary habits won’t bother me, but I can’t exactly do anything about it. I do have one request, though,” she said, looking at them seriously. “I want you to tell the others. They are good ponies, and the more close friends know about your secret, the better we’ll be able to protect you.”

Rarity and Fluttershy both cringed, and gave each other knowing looks. Twilight looked confused. “What? What is it?” she demanded.

“The thing is…” Fluttershy started.

“The others already know about us,” Rarity finished for her.

“Really?” Twilight said in surprise. “How? When? And why did nopony tell me?”

“Because…” Rarity twirled her hoof, before sighing and finally saying, “They’re not exactly ponies, either.”

“What?” Twilight exclaimed. “Are they all vampires too?!”

“No, they’re-” Rarity was cut off by two wolf-like howls, eerily close to the cottage.

“There go Rainbow Dash and Applejack,” muttered Fluttershy. "Again."

Rarity growled as she changed back into her vampire form. “Those mutts better not be hunting on our territory again!” She rushed past a shocked Twilight, and out into the forest.

“They don’t like to be called that, you know!” Fluttershy called after her, as she flew into the forest as well, shedding her disguise while she did. Twilight just stared after them, trying to wrap her head around what she had just learned.

“So, you know about us now?” asked a high-pitched voice right next to Twilight’s ear.

“Gah!” Twilight jumped, and turned to face the changeling that had Pinkie’s voice. “Pinkie? You’re a changeling?!”

“Well, duh,” Pinkie said, turning into her pony self just so she have eyes she could do an eye roll with. “I used to be one of Queen Chryssy’s drones but then I got bored of all the ‘stealing love’ stuff, because it’s mean and stealing is bad, so I decided to leave the hive and I came across a rock farm, where the family there adopted me as their daughter, but then I saw Dashie’s Sonic Rainboom, and I knew I wanted to make other ponies happy just like it made me happy, so that I could have more love to eat, and of course make other ponies happy! So I left home again, and I came to Ponyville, and I accidentally saw Jackie in her werewolf form, but when she saw I was a changeling she said it was okay and she wouldn’t have to change me or anything, which is really silly since I can already change because I’m a changeling, and even then, what would a werewolf changeling even look like? I mean we’re not even mammals, and-” She was cut off with Twilight pressed a hoof to her muzzle to shut her up.

“Okay, I get it, Pinkie,” Twilight said, desperate to stop the ling’s rambling. “I do have one question, though. Is Applejack the only werewolf in her family, or…”

“Oh, that’s an easy one. Apparently, the whole Apple family is just one giant wolf pack, and Dashie discovered them by accident. Hey, kinda like me! So, Jackie told me that Dashie thought being a werewolf was super duper awesomely splenderific, so she practically begged Jackie to turn her, and Jackie did, so now they’re a super duper dynamic hunting duo!” Pinkie giggled. “And Shy and Rarity are always chasing them off their territory, and it’s really fun to watch!” She pulled out a bucket of popcorn from somewhere, shed her disguise, and buzzed off in the direction of vampire-werewolf fighting.

Twilight stared in the direction she had gone. Her eye twitched once, twice, and then she fainted.

Author's Notes:

Just a random idea I had. It started with Fluttershy being secretly a vampire, then I though, "What if the others were supernatural beings, too?" I was originally going for all of them being different beings, but I really liked the idea of Fluttershy being a vampire, and Rarity also being a vampire, so I just ended up with the two of them vampires, RD and AJ werewolves, and Pinkie a changeling because why not.

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