The next morning, I wake up to my Pip Buck alarm with Laura Lee next to me, Sutures at my back. Archer is on her other side. Magpie and Sumac are cuddled together on the other side of Laura Lee. Last night we all slept together in a big pile in the parlor. While I really do not want to, I know I have to get up. As I untangle myself Laura Lee groans and says, “Give me a minute dear.”

From Sumac’s direction, I see movement and I hear her say, “Morning dears. I will go start breakfast.”

As I sit up trying to shake the grogginess off, I smile and tell her, “Thanks, dear. I really appreciate it.” Then I get up and first go outside to use the sinks, then as I return to put on my uniform, I see Johnny and Xerxes leaving the graveyard. They both smile and come over to talk briefly.

Once they are close enough, I tell them, “Morning Gentlestallions, it is good to see you this morning.”

“Morning Ma’am,” Johnny replies in his rough voice.

Next to him Xerxes also greets me with his slightly less gravelly voice.

Then Johnny asks, “So, did you get a chance to talk to your family Colonel?”

I smile as I tell him, “Yes, and once I get a once over by the doctors to make sure it is safe, I am going to do it, Johnny. Not just for you, but for my family too.”

Xerxes nods his head as Johnny just smiles and says thank you. Then Xerxes asks, “Do you know if any others are considering trying to carry one of our embryos?”

I nod my head and answer, “Actually, several. I know Purchase Order is. I have heard a couple of the cows and even one of our zebra mares in town discussing it.”

They both look at each other and I hear Xerxes say, “Well brother, we have succeeded in our promise to Sweet’s family.”

Johnny nods his head and I see him looking off into the far distance and he says, “Yeah, yeah we did. I think they would be proud of us for that.” He then turns his head and tells me, “Eh, Colonel, I know your units of the NCR here in Manesville have taken very heavy losses. Let those who survived know that if they ever need to talk, we are here for them. Ma’am, we took losses like that too. Especially when we went over the top in No Mare’s Land.”

I nod my head, “Johnny, I will do that. In fact, someday, I think I will need to just sit down and talk with someone who has been through what I have. Even if they were not with me.”

Then Xerxes suggests, “Maybe we could even build a small veterans hall over by Site Paddock. You know a place where the old veterans could go and just be with those who have been there.”

I nod my head, “Yeah, that would not be too bad of an idea. Outside of Site Paddock so you guys can get away from there for a bit too. You know, out amongst others.”

They look at each other and I hear Johnny laugh, “You know, I had never thought of it before. But it is kind of nice to see new faces now and again.”

We talk for a bit more then I hear Sumac call out the window, “Mollygirl, breakfast is ready. You need to get going soon.”

“I will be right there dear,” I call back to her. Then I tell them, “Ok, sorry guys, but I need to get back to my regiment. I will talk to you soon.”

They both smile at me and I hear them say, “Ok Colonel. We will see you later,”

“Oh, one more thing Johnny, your family is going to be getting a bit larger than expected, your great-niece Laura Lee is expecting twins.”

I see Johnny smile and before he can say anything I begin to laugh at the expression on Xerxes's face as he sits down in stunned amazement. Beside him, I hear Johnny letting loose with his mulish braying laughter as he points at his friend and comrade.

Finally, I hear Xerxes say, “A mule carrying twins, and she is related to you. How?”

Johnny stops laughing and tells him, “From my sister. Xerxes, she made it into the stable in the mine. But honestly, I always thought mules were completely sterile until Laura Lee let me know she was descended from my sister.”

I hear Xerxes ask in an undignified manner, “And pray to tell why did you not share this good news with me and the others?”

I see Johnny look embarrassed as he shrugs his shoulders and answers, “I did not want to hurt any of you by letting you know I had such good news. I mean after we have all lost so much.”

Xerxes then puts a hoof on his shoulder and tells him, “My friend, that, that is why you should have shared it with us, it would give all of us hope for our own families and friends. We can all hope our families made it to shelter and we just did not know it.”

“Sorry Xerxes, I had not thought of it that way.”

“No problem, but now we should let the others know, and congratulations to you Johnny as well as your family Colonel on the two expected additions,” Xerxes tells us and smiles, and with that, we all go our own way for the day.

After Breakfast Laura Lee and I are both on our way as quickly as we can to our units. As I enter, I see Paper Work get up from his desk and head to the old kitchen to begin some tea. Then I see Windy up ahead of me. She smiles and tells me, “Welcome back Ma’am.”

“Thanks, Windy. I appreciate it.”

“Before you get too comfortable, I need to tell you that the General has requested to meet with you sometime today. We just got the message in a bit ago by courier.”

“Ok, I will head over to the stable after morning formation. Oh, and after I get back you can begin your leave early.”

I see her grin, “Are you sure Mollygirl?”

I nod my head and tell her, “Unless something unexpected comes up.”

“Well, hopefully, nothing does. But who knows?” I tell her as I head up to my office and begin to make plans for the day.

Formation goes quickly and I give a brief speech welcoming back those who were returning from leave and giving one week's leave to the remainder. As I look at my regiment on the parade ground, I realize again how heavy our losses were, particularly in the Second Battalion that was airmobile.

I shake my head at this. Among my staff I see that Dharma is present along with Tek. However, I also see he now has a brace on his hind left leg and I can see the scarring on his side where he had been wounded. After formation, I go to talk to him, “Hey Chaplin, how ya doing?”

He smiles at me, but I can see the pain in his face as he says, “I am making it ma’am. They tell me eventually I can stop using the brace, but it was near thing with the leg. Thank Sweet Cream I got to keep it.”

I nod my head, “I hear you. Just to let you know it is really good to see you here. You gave us all a real scare.”

He smiles at me and tells me, “Mollygirl, I can understand that. It really scared me. When you see those leaving with her, it does make you realize how close you have come.”

I raise an eyebrow and I ask cautiously, “See who?”

He grins and tells me, “You know who. She appeared to me as a white cow. But I remember seeing her before when you got back from your first deployment.”

I then nod in understanding. “So, you have seen her too now. I will say, I am glad she did not take you with her.”

He smiles, “Me too. but ya know, part of me is disappointed too. But she said something about me helping her in her work and being blessed, so I guess Sweet Cream sent her to me.”

“Perhaps after lunch, you and I can sit down and discuss this more. Unfortunately, I have to head over to the stable now and talk with the General.”

I see the concern on his face as he asks, “What for ma’am? I hope that nothing new has come up that could affect us.”

I smile at him and I tell him, “I think it has to do with me having decided to put in my retirement papers and notifying the General officially after we got back.”

I watch as his jaw drops and I hear a moo of surprise come out of his mouth. Then he asks, “Are you, serious ma’am?”

I close my eyes, take a deep breath and when I exhale, I tell him, “Yes I am, and why is everyone so surprised at that?”

He looks at me and tells me, “Ma’am, I think it has a lot to do with the fact that as committed to your duty as you are, we did not expect you to ever leave the service.”

“Ok, that makes sense I guess,” I tell him. “But this time Chaplin, I have realized that duty to my family is important as well, and well I am really tired of leaving them all the time.”

I see him smile and he tells me, “Actually ma’am, I fully understand that. I have been wanting to start a family, but I am really afraid to, with our deployments and such.”

I raise an eyebrow and cock my head as I look at him. “Dharma, I did not even know you had your eye on any cow.”

I see him smile at the thought of her and he tells me, “Yeah, she has a heifer about Millie’s age even.” He pauses as if trying to decide if he should continue. Then he says, “She was widowed during the fight at Serenity Valley. Her name is Hennerita.”

I smile as he tells me her name and then I realize who she is. I was there the night her calf was born. I look at him and I tell him, “Perhaps some evening we can have you both for supper. Maybe even bring her daughter.”

He grins at me, “That would be great ma’am. I will let her know about the invite.”

Then I go to let Paper Work know I am heading to see the General. When I get to his desk, he smiles up at me and tells me, “Ma’am, when you get back, your retirement paperwork will be on your desk ready for you to sign so they can be submitted for approval.”

“Thank you so much Paper Work. I really do appreciate it.”

“I know you do ma’am, that is why I enjoy working for you.”

As I enter the stable, I run into Moon Pie and Buttermilk talking to a couple of the lower officers from the 1^st Regiment. Moon Pie sees me enter and comes over to me first.

“Good morning Colonel, it is good to see you again. How are you doing?” She asks me.

I greet her back and then I catch myself taking a deep breath and letting it out in a sigh. “I guess not too bad all things considered, but I do not have time to talk right now as I have to see the General. But I really do need to talk to you or Buttermilk about some things.”

She nods her head and tells me, “Ok, but stop by our offices on your way out. If we can’t see you right away, then we will at least make an appointment. But before you go, I do want to offer my condolences to you and your family on your loss.”

I smile somewhat at her empathy for us and I do appreciate it. Then I tell her, “Thank you and I will tell them. Also, I will head to your offices before I leave the stable today, ok?”

She smiles in her understanding way and tells me, “Ok, I will hold you to your promise then.”

Then she heads back off to the others and I continue on to the Brigade HQ. As I enter, I notice that some of the normal staff are missing. Major Pin Point sees me and comes over to greet me, “Good Morning Colonel. It is good to see you again. The General is in a meeting right now but should be available soon. He is expecting you.”

I nod my head at this and tell him, “That is fine I will wait.”

He smiles again and then asks, “Ma’am if you would like to sit over there by his office I can bring you some tea, coffee, or a beverage if you would like.”

“Tea would be fine. A bit of milk and two teaspoons of sugar or honey, whichever you have would be most welcome.”

“I will have it for you soon ma’am.” He tells me and trots off while I sit down.

I am about halfway through my tea when I see Storm Cloud come out of the office. He has a very serious expression on his face and when he sees me, he looks surprised. He nods to me and tells me, “Well, I am glad you are retiring, but you will be missed, Colonel.” Then he shakes my hoof.

As we shake hooves I tell him, “Thank you, Colonel. I will miss it, but my priorities have changed now.”

He nods his head, “Yeah, I do understand. I cannot say I blame you one bit either. Well, I best be going. I will talk to you later. Perhaps we can catch lunch and talk about our regiments later.”

I look at the time on my PipBuck and I tell him, “Depending on how long this lasts, I will take you up on that Storm, I will see you later then.”

He smiles and heads off out the door of the HQ and I see Pin Point coming to tell me, “The General will see you now.”

As I get up, I tell him, “Thank you, Major.” Then I head into the office.

As I enter, I am told, “Please take a seat.” Off to the side I am surprised to see Lieutenant Cake sitting there and I simply nod to him as I take my seat.

Then Threat Vector begins, “Colonel, the NCR does not have a long history, and we are starting to encounter some situations that we have never experienced before. Because of this, I have called in Lieutenant Cake to discuss how these types of situations were handled in the Equestrian Army.” As he says this he turns to Johnny and nods. Then he continues, “In this case, we have two regiments, one that has taken extremely heavy losses and a second that has taken heavy losses in one battalion, and one other that is only temporarily attached. I have discussed this with the Lieutenant as well as with Colonel Cloud who you just saw leaving. Before I make my decision, I wanted to discuss these options with both of you to get your opinions.”

I nod my head and respond by telling him, “Sir I appreciate that, I really do, but am I the one who you really want to ask that from when I will be retiring soon?”

“That is a legitimate question and I will tell you that your decision may impact how quickly you can retire. But I will still approve your retirement.”

I nod and he then tells Johnny, “Lieutenant, would you please tell the Colonel what you have told me and Colonel Cloud.”

Johnny then stands up and addresses me. “Colonel, back during my time down in No Mare’s Land while not overly common it happened enough that regiments or even sometimes larger commands took as heavy of casualties as yours and even the 2^nd Regiment took in your last campaign. The high command developed several different styles for dealing with such units. In part, we wanted to keep the unit histories alive and to remember their sacrifices. However, among the considerations was how long would a unit take to rebuild so that it may be combat effective again, and how much would it cost?”

He then pauses and I nod my head as does the General. He then continues, “The first way was to simply transfer the survivors from the one unit into the larger one. Then to disband the command of the smaller one. This effectively ended the unit’s heritage. A second way was to combine them and to retain both regiments’ designations in such a case we would see the Second and Third Regiments become the 2/3^rd Manesville regiment. Again, this was done sometimes and it allowed the two units to retain their pride. Another way was to simply place both units in second echelon status. By doing this they would temporarily no longer be considered combat-ready and would take time to rebuild them. Once ready they would then be returned to a combat duty footing. However, if needed before then, they could be used as a reserve and their ranks even filled with militia and reserve troops.” He pauses again, “By the way, that was what was done with the 23^rd Combat Engineers Battalion and why we were in Manesville working on Site Paddock on the Last Day.” I see him look into the distance briefly as he remembers that day. He shakes his head slightly and then says, “The final way was to completely disband both units and to send the survivors to other units in the army, wherever they were needed. This has the advantage of quickly replenishing other regiments with trained combat veterans, but also was considered least desirable due to the effect it had on the morale of this involved as well as the public in general.”

Again, I nod my head. Then the General asks, “Having heard the options, what is your recommendation?”

I think about it briefly and then I answer, “Sir, if we were still involved in a war, I would suggest we combine the two, preferably allowing them to keep their histories. However, as we are at peace for now; I would suggest that we keep both units independent and allow them to rebuild over time. This gives us the advantage of an Esprit de Corps for both being kept, as well as keeping two trained staffs intact.”

Threat Vector nods his head, “That does make sense. However, Mollygirl, if I go that way, I would like to delay your retirement some so that you can assist in rebuilding your regiment.”

I cringe when he says this and I tell him, “Sir, I understand, but I really do want to retire.”

He nods his head again and tells me, “If I decide to do it this way, how about we agree that your retirement will only be delayed until exactly one year after it lands on my desk.”

I am not happy with that suggestion and have my reservations so I ask, “And what if something happens that causes us to go to war again?”

I see him sigh as he tells me, “In this scenario, you would not be thrown into the lines unless we really needed you, but then again, even if you are retired already, in such a case you would be recalled.”

I nod my head and I tell him, “Ok sir, but I really do want your word on this.”

He cocks his head to the side and I see his tail swish back and forth in aggravation as he asks, “Would you feel better if it was in a written contract, or is my promise good enough?”

I sigh, “Sir, I will accept your word, after all, I know that while a written contract is almost unbreakable, you also had the reputation as a Talon of not breaking your word as if it were written.”

I see him almost smile at that and he tells me, “Thank you, Colonel. I will let you know my decision by tomorrow. Please have a good night and tell your family I said thank you for having me and some of the other staff members over at your party when the rest of your family got back.”

“Your welcome Threat. You are always welcome, however now that my family is ready for me to retire, well…”

“Yeah, I understand. Have a good one Mollygirl.”

“You too sir.”

After I leave his office, I head to the HQ for the 2^nd Regiment to see if Strom Cloud is in. As I arrive, he is just coming out of his office. I see him smile when he sees me and hear him greet me, “Mollygirl, good to see you made it. How about we head over the mess and get something to eat.”

“Sounds good. I think we have a few things to talk about while we eat.”

That night after I get home from work, I am at the dinner table when Magpie says, “Mollygirl, I can tell something is bothering you. What is it?”

I look at all of my family there and I tell them, “Today I had a meeting with the general. We discussed how to handle rebuilding the regiments of the brigade, and he said I may have to wait an extra year to retire.”

I see Sutures slap a hoof on the table and cuss as she says, “I knew it was too good of a thing to happen.”

Laura Lee plays the voice of reason as she calms the others down. Then she asks, “Mollygirl, did he say you would have to deploy during that time?”

I sigh as I tell her, “Well, not unless we have another major war come up during that time.”

She tilts her head and I watch her long ears flop slightly, but in a cute way as she looks at me and then asks, “And wouldn’t you be called up if it was that serious anyways? I mean look what they did to the militia when they formed the 4^th Regiment.”

“Yeah, you're right. I am sorry. I am just so ready to get out now.”

Magpie gets up from her seat and comes around the table and wraps her hooves around me from behind. She kisses me lightly and tells me, “Dear, we all want you home now, and if we can’t have you retire yet, then this would be acceptable too. Just promise us you will retire as soon as possible, ok?”

I smile at her and then the others. Then I tell them all, “I signed my paperwork for retirement today. It will go to the General tomorrow morning. Oh, and Paper Work had me sign a second set, just in case something happens to the first.”

When I say that, I hear Archer begin to laugh out loud as he tries to speak. Finally, he is able to say, “That would mess with them. I wish I had thought of that.”

I have to grin at him when he says this and I tell him, “Besides, I have a feeling Threat Vector will delay his retirement also.”

This gets a real surprise out of both Archer and Laura Lee as they both say, “He is going to retire too?”

I nod my head, “Yes dears. He and I have been discussing it since I got back. He is just as tired as I am. Especially with the debacle at Coltlumbia.”

I then hear Moon Lily say, “But Mama Mollygirl, it wasn’t his fault. He didn’t want to do it that way. He was ordered by the General Staff. I was there delivering our morning reports when he was on the radio arguing against it.”

I raise my eyebrow as I look at Moon. I also notice all the other adults are looking at her with rapt attention. Then I ask, “Moon, why didn’t you tell us this earlier?”

She looks at her parents and siblings and finally says, “Ma, it was official business, and even I should not have heard it.”

I nod my head as does Epona at the opposite end of the table. Epona then says, “You did good little sister, now, the rest of us need to keep our mouths shut about it. If they want it kept quiet, then it is for a reason I would assume.”

Goddesses, I love the kid, but she really learned about operational security and keeping her mouth shut too well, I think to myself.

With that, we change the subject back to less military subjects as Sumac asks, “So Archer, what do you think of trying to raise a bit of sorghum this year?”

Three days later I get called to the Brigade HQ. As I arrive, I see the other three Regimental commanders also arriving. We are escorted into the General's office where we all take seats around a table with a chalkboard at one end of it that is covered by a cloth.

Threat Vector stands by the board and begins by saying, “Good Morning. The reason I called all four of you here is that I have discussed our options with the War Department in Junction City.” He pauses and looks at each of us before he continues. “It has been decided that we will retain all four regiments. However, we will also begin to rebuild them. What this will mean is that each of you will be asked to assist in these efforts.” He looks right at me and says, “Mollygirl, I got your retirement package yesterday and I have approved it for one year from yesterday. Please understand, this is not personal, but the NCR needs you and me both. My package has already been sent to the War Department and I was told it was on hold for a year and a half.” He then looks at Storm Cloud and tells him, “This also means you will have to wait a bit longer for your next promotion. But during the time in between, we can also begin to train up our staffs and those who will replace us so the transitions will be easier.”

After he says this, I see Sirocco raise a wing and when the General nods to him he asks, “Ok sir, I can understand why you have them here, but why am I here?”

I see Sirocco nodding his head but I also notice him tense slightly as he says, “Because you are the commander of the 4^th Regiment. Currently, your regiment is no longer a standard militia, they are reservists. This means in an emergency the full regiment can be activated.”

I watch as both of Sirocco’s wings begin to rise and he begins to look angry. Threat Vector puts up a hoof and tells him, “Sirocco, hear me out before you get too angry. The powers that be wanted me to keep your regiment activated indefinitely. Instead, I have talked them into allowing us to have a rotation of your battalions. After this meeting, I want to sit down and discuss with you what you consider a reasonable rotation would be for your reservist.”

While still not overly happy, I see him settle down a bit and he tells the General, “Ok sir, we can discuss it, but just so you know, most of my people really are ready to return to their normal life.”

After we finish the meeting all of us leave except Sirocco. While part of me wishes I was a bug on the wall, I am also glad I am not going to be there for the ensuing fight. From the Brigade HQ, I head to the medical section of the stable, from there it is only a hop skip and a jump to the offices of Moon Pie and Buttermilk. Outside of their offices is now a quiet waiting area along with a receptionist.

As I come up to the receptionist, I can barely hear some music playing on the speakers. It is interesting as it is not our normal music but instead sounds like several woodwind and string instruments. But over them all, I can hear the deep sound of a cello being played so very expertly. I find myself closing my eyes as I listen to it, only to be brought back to reality by the mare at the receptionist desk asking, “Can I help you, Colonel?”

I am a bit startled as I realize how I had become so immersed in the music and reply, “Oh, sorry about that, I was just really enjoying the music so much.”

She smiles, “I understand what you mean. This is an old wartime recording of the Ponyville symphony. I do believe that the cello is being played by Octavia herself. Every time I hear her, I wonder what became of her.”

I nod my head, and I tell her, “I had no idea who it was. But the music seems to just pull at your soul.”

The receptionist smiles and tells me, “I fully understand. I actually consider it a fringe benefit of working here.”

Still smiling, I tell her, “I can understand that.” Then I ask her, “Are Buttermilk or Moon Pie available?”

She looks at her appointment book, scrunches up her face as she examines them, and then tells me, “Buttermilk should be available in the next half hour.”

I nod my head and calmly tell her, “That would be fine. Thank you.”

I am sitting there reading an article about the changes in combat engineer tactics in a wartime Equestrian Army Today as I wait. I find it to be a rather fascinating article as it is and I am thinking of seeing if I can take the magazine with me so I can give it to Bailey Bridge to read when I am stunned to see the authors are 2^nd Lieutenant Xerxes, and 1^st Lieutenant High Grade of the 23^rd Equestrian Combat Engineers. I smile and shake my head at my having known the authors.

What really surprises me is when I look up and I see one of the other survivors from Site Paddock come out of the office with Buttermilk. She is wearing her old sergeants’ uniform and is an earth pony who may have once had a yellow mane and tail to go with her light tan coat. She sees me and the magazine I am reading. I see she wants to say something but is hesitant as she looks at my collar. So, I ask, “Yes sergeant, what can I do for you?”

I see her squirm slightly and I hear her hoarse voice ask, “Ma’am, if you are done with the magazine, could I have it back. I didn’t mean to leave it out.”

Ah, now I understand. “Oh, no problem Sergeant, I hope you do not mind my having read it. It does have some interesting concepts in it that I really enjoyed reading.”

I see her smile as best she can and as I put it in her saddlebag she says, “Thank you, Colonel. I really do appreciate it. It is one of my touchstones with the past. I discussed the article with the lieutenants as they wrote it, then I proofread it for them.”

“Sergeant, I can understand that. I have a few touchstones myself. Again, thank you for having left it out so I could read it and being understanding about it.”

I see her look slightly bashful and she says, “Your welcome ma’am. Have a good day.” Then she turns to Buttermilk and says, “Thank you to ma’am. I really needed to talk to someone about that. Even after all these years it still bothers me.”

As she says this, I feel a sense of dread in my mind as I think of all the things that are still bothering me from over the years. I cannot think of that white-coated and brown-maned bastard without shaking still. Both at what he did to those I love but also to myself.

Then the sergeant looks at me one more time and she asks permission to ask a personal question. Normally I would not agree to this, but I can tell she needs to ask, so I agree. Then she asks, “Ma’am, how come I can see you on both sides, but not any other of the breathers around here?”

I sigh as I tell her, “Honestly sergeant, the best I can figure is that I was actually dead and they were able to resuscitate me. But I too know what it feels like to be turned away from Elysium.”

She nods her head and says, “I wondered about that Ma’am. Then she looks at Buttermilk and asks, “Ma’am, you don’t seem surprised at this?”

Buttermilk laughs lightly and tells her, “Sergeant, I have known the Colonel for many years now. When I first met her, I had heard some ghouls talking about it, so no, I am not surprised. But the person to talk to about it is not me. But her, if she wants to.”

I see the sergeant nod her head again. Then she says, “Colonel if you ever need somepony to talk to about that, I am here for you ma’am.”

I look at her and smile. Then I tell her, “And I will be here for you as long as I am on this side of the grass.”

She then smiles back at me and says, “Thank you, ma’am, I will be seeing you around then. And Ma’am, please, do come to visit us at Site Paddock.”

I nod my head, and shift my ears a couple of times to let her know I am serious before I tell her, “I will, and one of the things I want to talk to Buttermilk about is if I should carry one of your foals?”

I see her head go up and a gleam comes into her eyes as she asks, “Do you really mean it, ma’am. If these little ones begin to be born, then that means we will have officially completed our mission. We will pay back Sweet Corn for what he did for us.”

I see Buttermilk cock her head some and she smiles. Then I tell the Sergeant, “Sarge, one of my daughter’s fiancé is talking about it too, and my wife Sutures says that the Followers are discussing coming to help with it. What you all have done there is a blessing from Sweet Cream.”

She grins back at me and tells me, “Colonel, thank you so much for telling me that. Honestly, It means there was a reason for us to be here still. You have to understand, we have all questioned why we are still here at least one time or another.”

I put a hoof on her shoulder and see her flinch slightly and before I can say anything she says, “Sorry Ma’am, I have been like that when anyone has touched me since No Mares’ Land. Maybe someday we can talk about,” she chokes up slightly, then finishes, “But I really don’t want to think about it, much less talk about it right now.”

I look right into her eyes with their scratched corneas and I tell her, “Sarge, I understand, and maybe, just maybe we can exchange stories and help each other get some things off of our chest.”

Then as she leaves, Buttermilk says, “Come on in and have a seat Mollygirl. It sounds like we have a few things to talk about then.”

As I sit down, I toss my soft cap on the table next to my chair. She is sitting in a chair across from me and is leaning forward waiting for me to begin.

So I begin. I talk to her some about how I feel having lost Badger. I also bring up the fact that the nightmares have returned. Not often, but when they hit, they are hitting me hard. But I also begin to talk to her about how badly I want to retire but am being forced to wait. Then I tell her, “Part of why I am so upset I think is that I have been thinking of going to Site Paddock and carrying one of their embryos.”

She nods her head and asks, “So, you said that your regiment will not be deploying until after it is rebuilt unless it is an emergency, right?”

I nod my head, “Yeah Buttermilk, why?”

“Then Mollygirl, I cannot see a real problem with that then. I mean honestly, talk to the General about it and get his permission, but if he clears you then why let your last bit of time in service stop you?”

“You know Buttermilk, your right. I really had not thought about doing it before I got out. Thank you.”

She smiles, then she asks, “So, do you want to set up another appointment for next week. We can discuss how the exercises I have told you about are helping with your WSD and perhaps work on some other things.”

I nod my head, “Yeah, I was already planning on it. Thanks, Buttermilk. Oh, and Tell Cornbread I said hi. The family really would like to have you and your calves over for dinner again sometime soon.”

She smiles and replies, “I would like that Mollygirl. But this time, no trying to get us to take home another enfield pup. I have my hooves full as it is.”

“I promise I won’t. See you later,” and then she walks me out of the office into the waiting room where she greets her next client before taking them into the office too.

That night after dinner our entire family as well as Xavier and Persimmon are there. We all look at the unopened letter over the picture frame and Moon Lily looks at us and says, "Mas’ Pa, I think it is time for us to read it."

She uses her Tk to bring it down to her. And then she asks, “Who would like to read it aloud to us?”

I watch as Shadowbuck stands up and says, “I will sis.”

He walks over to the center of the room and he places the now opened letter in front of him and he begins to read.

To my loving family,

If you are reading this, then I am already gone. I pray that you all are safe and have not joined me yet. I would be a liar if I said that I am not afraid of what tomorrow will bring. We have all been in combat together, you all know what it is like. But the funny thing is, it is not the dying that bothers me most, it is the fact that I will not be there for you in the future. Well, at least not until you each make your trip to Elysium. But I will tell you all, I will be there to greet you when it is your time.

Well except for maybe Moon Lily, as I really am not sure how long Alicorns live, and if the cattle are right, then maybe Moon you will see me again as another youngster. If so, I look forward to it dear.

My sons, I am sorry I have not had the time to teach you more of the things a father should. I have tried to be there for each of you as much as I could, but I know I was not the best. However, you still have Papa Archer to help you. Well, at least you will still have him I hope.

My daughters; know I am sorry I will not be there to protect and care for you as you get older. I had looked forward to your first kisses and dates, your weddings, and even your children. Millie, while you have not gotten your cutie mark yet, I know it will be a special one and that it will be all yours, just like Moon’s is and Raven’s is. Epona, Ginger, and Purchase, I love each of you as if you were my own blood and am very proud of all of you.

My wives, I am sorry I could not come home again as I promised. You each meant so much to me and each of you filled a special place in my heart. I only wish I could see you each one last time and hold each of you again. Mollygirl, I wish I could have gotten to see your special spot down in Hackamore with you. But at least I got to spend some time at our home with you. Also, I will apologize for hurting you so bad all those years ago. I just was so ashamed I could not do more, and then I did not know how to handle your having died and coming back.

Magpie, you are also very special. I admire the way you can find things so quickly and how easily research came to you. Again, I am sorry for the way I hurt you but thank you for forgiving me and giving me a second chance.

Sutures, thank you for taking me into your life as well. Thank you for sharing your pain and joys with me and the rest of our family. I also need to say thank you for taking care of all of us the way you have and for delivering our family's foals safely.

Sumac, my dear sweet Sumac. I will certainly miss you my beautiful older mare. You have been a lynchpin for our entire family and helped to hold us together through so much. Please know that I will always remember our time together and I will never forget how you helped me after the second battle of Hereford.

Laura Lee, while a distant spouse, please know, I love you as much as the others. Please let Cedar and Cannel know I feel the same way for them also. I only wish I could have given you and them the same gift that Archer has.

My brother-husband Archer. If you are reading this, then know I loved you like no other stallion. You were both a brother and a father that I never had. You taught me how to be a stallion when nopony else ever had. I could never repay you for all you have done. But I have one final thing to ask you to do for me, please take care of our family and protect them since I cannot.

I have a feeling that Xavier and his family are there right now too. If so, know I have considered you as family too, for almost as long as I have known you. Xochitl, you are more than that, you are my son also. I could not think of a better match for Ginger and I am just glad you two are married. I also am hopeful that you two will beat the odds as Laura Lee has and that you will be able to have a foal yourselves.

Well, it is getting very late, and I need to try and catch at least a quick nap before revile. Know I do, and always will love you, my family,

Yours always,

Honeybadger.

After he finishes reading the letter, I see Shadowbuck wipe his eyes and then he gently folds the letter and puts it back into the envelope. Once he has done that, Moon takes it in her TK and places it back on top of the picture frame.

We all sit there holding each other and then Sumac, wiping her eyes too, says, “How about we each tell one of our favorite stories about Badger to each other.

With that, we each begin to remember him and the good times we shared with him and each other. He will be missed, but as long as we live, he will not be forgotten.

Later that night I am curled up between Sutures and Laura Lee when I feel one of her foals kick. She moves her hoof down to her belly and she asks, “Mollygirl, did you feel that too?”

I grin at her and tell her, “Yes love, I did. I think that little one wants to make sure we know that they are there alright.”

She is running her hoof through my mane and asks, “Mollygirl, are you still thinking of carrying one of the embryos?”

I nod my head and feel Sutures shift behind me. Then I tell her, “Funny you should ask that too. It seems your Uncle Johnny has asked me to carry one that was from his parents. That would make it his sibling and your ancestor.”

I hear her laugh lightly before she replies, “You know, somehow with this family, that just seems normal.”

From behind me, I hear Sutures laugh and she finally says, “Ok dears, you two have to be up early now let’s get some sleep. And Mollygirl, I already set you up for a medical exam at the stable when I was seeing Moon Pie this morning. They know why.”

I roll over to face her and kiss her gently on her forelock. "Then I tell her, thank you, love. I really appreciate it.”

Then after they have fallen asleep and I am beginning to drift off I think to myself, Today has been a good day.

Dear DJ Pon3,

Today is one of those days where I have once again questioned why am I still here. Why did I survive when others haven’t? When seeking help today I came across another who, while her story is different, it is similar enough that we understand each other and offered to help each other during the rough times. Colonel, thanks for taking the time for talking to an old sergeant when she needed it. As a reminder to others out there that there is still hope and we can share it with each other, could you please play Sunshine for me?

Thank you

Sergeant Clover Patch, formally of the 23^rd Equestrian Combat Engineers Battalion.

As we near the end of this journey I would like to thank Kkat for creating the world of FoE so we can all enjoy it. I would also like to thank so many others who have added to it and who have helped to flush it out more with each story.

For those who desire to listen to this chapters dedication song, the YouTube link is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11zhUi7Eprg