Dear Memoir,

It seems as though my life has finally turned around! Thanks to the help of those blank fl the Cutiemark Crusaders, I was able to amend my relations with my schoolmates. It's most likely best to start over this morning.

Today, was the usual election student President which I was certainly a horseshoe in for being reinstated. After we were let for recess a young colt named Pipsqueak started to announce something that made my blood boil. He was running for student President with the Crusaders as his campaign managers!

I was furious that this pathetic nopony had actually proclaimed he was going against me!!! Anyway, when the campaign concluded and Miss Cheerilee was about to read the results I was confident that Pipsqueak wouldn't have a single vote. Turns out I only had one vote while he had the rest of the classes' including Silver Spoon!

I confronted her about this and due to my earlier dismissal of Silvie's ideas she finally sided against me. Usually, I would be able to take this from her but it's what she said next that pushed my buttons. Let me point out we made up in the end and if my past self ever read the first part (As if that was possible) she would call me crazy.

This is what Silver Spoon said to me which I had to hear it from her again to get it to the word for word: "Am I? Because I tried to help by mentioning your 'surprise' statue, and suddenly, I wasn't even allowed to speak! You could have actually won this election if you just listened to me. You wanna know how? [She whispered this after shutting my gaping and shocked open mouth closed] Sorry. I'm not allowed to speak."

I ran off after screaming in absolute rage, I never thought I could be so mad at my best friend. While I was running away from Silver, I happened to bump into Mother who scolded me for my loss against Babs Seed. This completely stole my rage and replaced it with doubt, her constant reminders to set an example always sapped my energy.

The next part is kinda embarrassing to write about so I'll be quick I lamented about wanting to be somepony else. With mother's constant pressure and Silver Spoon, I had no else to vent to aside from myself. I sang a stupid song and the Crusaders actually followed me! When a day passed I returned to school to my pretty awkward class for the day, the Crusaders basically caught up to me as I was walking out of the schoolhouse.

I thought at first that they had come to gloat about their victory as campaign managers instead they invited me to hang in their clubhouse. Since I didn't have anything better to do I begrudgingly accepted their invitation a decision that would change my life. I found out that they had followed me out of worry rather than to just spy on me. I will admit ever since my cutiemark appeared I have never truly understood the full meaning behind it.

My cutiemark shows my favorite tiara that I always wear, that could have meant so many different things. My regality, wealth, future status, and a few other things. After my cute-ceañera, I narrowed it down to ordering others to do my bidding. Father is a business stallion so it makes sense for that to run in the family. I think the Crusaders were about to help me to start changing my ways when Pipsqueak opened the door.

His request for new playground equipment had been denied by the school board due to not enough bits in the budget. It was like fate had swung back in my favor, seeing this as an opportunity to become student president. I raced out of the Crusaders clubhouse with them shouting behind me. I had to run across town to get to the schoolhouse which gave them the chance to persuade me as I was running.

As we closed by the split in the road to the schoolhouse I took the left path, I'll admit they had almost convinced on the way. It took what occurred next to finally snap me out of my old mindset. Mother had been finishing up from a meeting at this time so when she exited the school building I happened to have just arrived. She scolded me for speaking with the Crusaders’ kind, I felt the rage from yesterday surge right through me again. I finally managed to say no to Mother for the first time in my life!!!

I stood up for the Crusaders, throughout the years that the trio formed they have worked on every way they can think of to earn their cutiemarks. Something inside demanded, not just urged, demanded that I stop her from down talking all their work. I managed to get my father to fund the equipment via a note that I gave Mother to deliver to him. Many of my classmates were understanding and forgave me for pointing out their unique traits the day before. I even made up with Silver Spoon.

With the help of a few adults, we got a new playground up in just two hours I felt so happy. And wouldn't you know it the Cutiemark Crusaders figured out what their special talents were. All three gained their cutiemarks in a big show of light, each had a shield with different pictures. Apple Bloom has an apple with a heart inside. Scootaloo has a wing with a lightning bolt, she was ecstatic to show to her ‘big sister’ Rainbow Dash. Sweetie Belle has a five-pointed star with a single music note inside of it.

The shields represent the connection between each other through helping ponies with understanding/getting their own marks. I think for the first time in Ponyville history was held a triple cute-ceañera for a group that got them at the same time. It's still a lot to take in when you think about it, but I know that today is the start of something amazing. Of course, I kinda figured something out that makes me pretty… discouraged.

I found myself slipping back, I accidentally called Scootaloo a chicken when she hovered past a minute (her new personal record). I immediately apologized explaining that it was pretty much a habit. It may be a while before I'm fully changed and there are a few others that I need to make up with. That scares me. Before all this happened, I never really thought about what my words could do to somepony.

I wrote this part of my entry because I actually can't sleep. I woke up silently screaming, luckily, I didn't wake anypony up. I just cannot seem to recall my dream.

I'll write more when I have a chance, but that is all for tonight (if I can manage to get some sleep that is.)

-💎