“Anon, wake up.”

Starlight hovered over him, rocking him with a hoof.

Anon groaned, a dopey, peaceful smile on his face.

“Anon. Come on, time to get up.” Starlight jostled his shoulder.

Anon grumbled, then mumbled.

“Huh?”

He mumbled again.

“Anon come on, we have to get ready.”

Anon mumbled a third time. It sounded like, “Mmm, I can’t.”

“Oh, you definitely can,” Starlight said. “Come on, we have to leave soon.”

“Mrrh, I can’t… Anymore.”

“What? You can’t what anymore?”

“Mmh, I can’t keep licking, Luna. My mouth is tired…”

Starlight flushed. She lifted her pillow and smothered his face with it.

Anon wiggled, then squirmed, then struggled, then yelled into the pillow.

“Oh good, you’re awake.” Starlight lifted it.

Anon gasped and gulped down air.

“Are you crazy?” he yelled.

“Shh, keep your voice down. It’s still early.” Starlight jumped off the bed, then turned to look at him. She waited for him to catch his breath, then said, “You good? Great. We’re going to help them set up today, so I figured we should get up early. That way we can grab breakfast first.”

Anon turned away from her. “No.”

“Huh? What do you mean ‘no’?”

“I mean no. This is your thing, not mine. I’m going back to sleep.”

“Come on, Anon, they might need your help. Those fingers of yours are really useful, especially to earth ponies.”

“I don’t care.”

Starlight glowered. “Don’t think I won’t drag you out of bed if I have to.”

Anon tucked his head beneath the covers. “Do your worst.”

“My worst, huh? Hmm.” Starlight jumped onto the end of the bed, in front of where Anon was lying, turned around, and lifted her tail.

“Oh, Anonymous…” she sang.

Anon poked out his head. “I told you I’m not going to— fffffffffffffffffffffffffffff!” Anon jolted, flailed for balance, then fell off the side of the bed and smacked the ground head first.

“Hah, that was easy. Looks like you’re up now.” Starlight leapt off the bed and opened the door. “Hurry up and get dressed, I’ll meet you downstairs.” She left him dazed on the ground, tangled in blankets, and giggled to herself as she trotted to the dining room.

--

Anon trudged down the stairs, grumbling about dirty tricks and “stupid, sexy Starlight.”

He entered the dining area and scanned the room. There were a few ponies scattered around, more than he had seen the previous evening anyway. Starlight was sitting at a table in the corner, munching on a salad and scribbling something on parchment paper. When she saw him, she smiled and threw him a cheery good morning. Too cheery, almost as though she were gloating.

Anon sat across from her and grumbled his reply.

“They’ve really packed the day with events.” Starlight said, then levitated a cherry tomato into her mouth.

Anon’s face was flat and disinterested. He rested his cheek against his fist. “You don’t say.”

Starlight nodded. “And Silver Bell insisted I address the marchers when they finish their route. I guess there’s going to be a parade at the end.”

“Fascinating.”

“That’s where you come in. They’ll start just outside of town and travel down the main thoroughfare to town hall. I need you to meet up with them and see if you can lend a hoof, but also get to know them a little. Some inside information on what moves them will help me put the finishing touches on this speech.”

Anon dropped his chin on the table and groaned.

“Come on, quit being such a big foal about it,” Starlight said. “It’s only for a few hours, and there’s going to be a huge party at the end. Tons of dessert and stuff.”

“What about you. What are you going to do while I play spy for you?”

“Silver Bell wants me to help coordinate the vendors and the crowds, remember?”

He didn’t.

“The town center will be pretty packed, so we have to make sure everypony’s organized.”

Starlight rested a hoof on his forearm and smiled, a soft look that stabbed his heart.

“Thanks for helping, by the way. I know this isn’t what you’re here for, but I appreciate it.”

Anon lifted his head. It was those eyes again, that rich blue. Her ass had competition for best feature.

“Yeah… No problem, fam.”

Anon ordered oatmeal and raisins for breakfast. The oats were fresh, so it was pretty good. Starlight talked about the schedule of events, all the things he’d tuned out during the previous night’s dinner. She finished breakfast before him, so she told him when and where to meet her—in four hours, by the stage—rolled up the rough draft of her speech, and left.

Anon headed to the Stableton outskirts when he finished eating. The whole town seemed busy with preparations. When he passed through the market square, he noticed it was empty, like Ponyville’s market on Hearthswarming Eve. Seemed like all the traders had gone home, or gone to hawk wares in different towns. Anon guessed it was a pretty serious local holiday. Good for Starlight, she was really moving up in the world.

He made it out past the town’s border, or, anyway, to the part where the cute little horse houses were one-an-acre instead of one every few feet. Only about a fifteen-minute walk given the town’s modest size.

A large group of ponies were crowded in a field. Some were chatting, others resting on the grass, but all were either wearing or holding a grey uniform shirt. When Anon approached them, the group’s relaxed attitude shifted toward general apprehension, heads and eyes turned in his direction. Anon stopped midfield, hands in his pockets, and looked around.

“Uh…”

“Take it easy, you bunch of geldings. This is Starlight Glimmer’s sasquatch,” a blue pegasus mare with a black mane said, emerging from the group.

Anon felt a vein in his head throb. “Sasquatch?”

She trotted up to Anon and stretched out a hoof. “Rainy Days, pleasure to meet you.”

Anon hesitated, then squatted and bumped her hoof with his fist. “I’m Anonymous.”

“You’re a lot more handsome than the sasquatch we used to get in the silverback mountains. They should all shave,” Rainy Days said, eying him up and down.

“I’m not a sasquatch, but…” Anon looked along her body to her flank. “You’re pretty hot, so you get a pass.”

“Oh yeah? Well come find me when this is all over and I’ll have us both sweating by moonrise.”

Anon loved how straightforward mares were.

“I take it Starlight Glimmer sent you for an inspection?” Rainy Days said.

“Inspection? Uh, I guess sort of. She asked me to help you get ready for the parade.”

“Hear that, colts? Starlight Glimmer wants us in top shape for our march. Let’s make these last drills count,” Rainy yelled to the group. They responded with a collective whinny, some stomping hooves.

“Woah. They seem pretty disciplined,” Anon said.

“Yep, trained them myself. We don’t need much out here, but some of these foals still have trouble getting their uniforms on.” Rainy pointed her hoof at Anon’s hand. “That claw of yours would be a lot of help. The faster we get them dressed, the sooner we can get them in ranks.”

Anon nodded and stood. The marchers were more comfortable with his presence knowing he was with Starlight. As he went around helping them get their uniforms on, some even asked him about her, and whenever one did, everypony in earshot stopped what they were doing and listened. Anon didn’t know what Starlight would be comfortable with him saying, so he stuck to the basics. She was probably the most powerful unicorn in Equestria, she had a booty that wouldn’t quit, and, oh yeah, she was the protégé of the princess of friendship. This last fact made them look uneasy for some reason. Anon guessed they liked Luna and Celestia better. He didn’t blame them.

When they were all dressed and ready, Anon joined Rainy at their head. She stomped her hooves and called them to “Fall in”. The ponies formed into five parade squares, five by eight each, each led by a unicorn carrying a different flag. The first square had the flag of Equestria, the second a flag with Celestia’s cutie mark, followed by Luna’s, then Cadance’s, and Twilight’s for the last square. “Pass in review.” Rainy yelled, then she led Anon along the line, beaming.

Anon rubbed his hand behind his head as he walked. “Uh, wow. They’re like an army.”

Rainy nodded. “I’m sure Starlight Glimmer will be impressed with what we’ve accomplished in her absence.”

“Oh, uh. Yeah, I guess so.”

When they reached the end of the line, Rainy turned and called, “Right turn!”

The column rotated in unison.

“Advance!”

They marched, steps aligned, faces stern. Anon shifted his feet. Rainy marched her parade around the field. The great, multicolor band followed direction without hesitation. Anon watched for an hour as they turned, aligned, circled the field, then realigned. Unease bubbled in his stomach, until by their fifth pass he had to say something.

“Hey, Rainy?”

“What is it?” She said, still studying the march.

“Don’t you think this is a little much for a parade?

Rainy shook her head. “Not at all. Starlight Glimmer needs to know the strength of our resolve. We are ready to carry forward what she started many moons ago.”

“You don’t say.” Anon scratched the back of his head. “Well, guess it’s time for me to be hittin’ the old dusty trail…”

“Are you reporting back to Starlight Glimmer?” Rainy asked.

“Yeah. Something like that.”

“Please inform her that we’re ready to move at her command!”

“Uh, yeah, will do.”

Anon shoved his hands in his pockets and walked toward town. The thunder of hooves and Rainy’s sharp commands continued behind him.