It all started with a vision.

Upon nearly failing the entrance exam to get into Celestia's prestigious School for Gifted Unicorns, the sound of an explosion ripped through the air and triggered something within me.

Before I even knew what was happening, my horn had blazed to life with a violent burst of power and my world had been reduced to white hot agony. I don't know what the cause was for what happened next, and I doubt I'll ever know for sure, but for me, this is where it all began.

As I floated there, writhing in pain from the intensity of the magical feedback, I began to see visions of all the ponies in the classroom. The other CSGU hopefuls, the staff overlooking the exam, my parents... the Princess and her Royal Guard.

I saw each and every one of them burned away in the arcane fire of my own magical backlash. One by one, they were burned to ash. They screamed, they tried to run, they scrambled away. they covered their faces, but none of them could escape the eruption of raw arcane power.

I think it was the looks of horror that stuck out to me the most.

In any case, they all died, and the strangest thing happened in that moment. As they burned away, and as I continued emitting deadly waves of mana—as the school was inevitably destroyed, along with the entire street. the city beyond, and eventually the whole mountain was reduced to a pile of so much rubble...

I no longer felt any pain.

Looking back on it, maybe I had snapped from the agony and despair. Maybe something—some synapses in my brain had gotten twisted in such a way to make me into what I was... what I eventually became.

I don't know.

What I did know was that when everything finally settled and the Princess had finally gotten my magic surge under control, they said I'd been laughing like a filly possessed even as tears spilled down my face.

I just kept laughing and laughing and laughing until I passed out.

I don't really remember that part all that well, but I do remember the vision. Though it had turned out Celestia had made it in time and nopony around me had suffered anything more than some minor scrapes, superficial bruises, and easily reversible transmutation in the case of my parents, that vision stuck with me.

Everything was fine in the end... or so I thought.

Not only did I pass the exam, but I became Celestia's personal protégé and got my cutie mark in the process. I had even apparently managed to hatch the dragon egg during that exam—something that was supposed to be impossible.

I had also somehow made it rapidly grow well into adulthood, much to my own shock. Thankfully Celestia had managed to fix that as well, and the dragon was reverted back to a mere newborn drake.

I didn't hear about any of this until I woke up in a hospital bed in Canterlot General. I, of course, told the doctors, my parents, and Celestia about the vision, and they all deduced that I'd simply been traumatized by the experience.

Maybe I was, but the strange thing was that at the time, I didn't feel like that was the case. After all was said and done, I felt completely fine, yet at the same time, I knew—maybe instinctively, but I knew something had changed.

I knew something was wrong, but I didn't fully register it.

When I thought back on my vision, it wasn't with any sort of fear or shaking or crying or anything like that. No, the reason I had unconsciously known something was wrong was because every time I thought back on that vision of death and destruction, it was with a strange sort of relish.

I didn't realize that was what I was feeling back then, and had I realized that was the case, maybe I would've told Celestia and the others. Maybe then, I wouldn't have gone down this dark and gruesome path I trotted, but it's too late for that now.

I can't turn back the hooves of time.

In any case, it was this sense of wrongness that caused me to reject Celestia's offer to raise the baby dragon I had hatched. Normally I would've jumped to take the offer—it was Princess Celestia who had asked after all.

The thing was, when she showed me that dragon—showed me how innocent and helpless he was, I began to get scared. I couldn't figure out why, but I started shaking and my heart started pounding in my chest.

It was like something in me was rejecting the dragon, and I thought 'maybe I'm just more scared of dragons than I realized', but no, that wasn't the case. Either way, I refused—more adamantly than strictly necessary I might add—the offer to raise the dragon right then and there, much to Celestia's shock and disappointment.

I hated myself for the look she gave me, but my mind was already made up. She put the dragon in somepony else's care, and that was that. I never saw him again, and to this day I still have no idea who raised him.

It was the right decision, as I had eventually come to find out, and I was glad for it.

Things settled down after that for the most part. I stayed in the hospital for another few weeks or so while the doctors did some more thaumatological, mental, and physical testing to make sure I was completely healthy.

Apparently they hadn't found anything too strange other than an abnormally high magical capability. Nevertheless, they still had me come in once every month for therapy after I'd left due to my experience.

Once I was released, I spent a few more weeks with my family before finally moving into the castle. I was a bit confused by the change, but apparently being the Princess's protégé meant I got my own room and board within the very walls of Canterlot Castle.

It was something to do with the Princess being able to more easily manage her busy schedule if I was nearby.

Something I should probably mention was that before I came to the castle—way back when I was still in the hospital in fact—I started to have strange dreams. I never remembered the content of these dreams, but every time I woke up, I felt a strange mix of horror and excitement.

I never told anypony about the dreams, mostly because I couldn't ever remember them, but they continued on after I left the hospital. They continued to happen on and off at home, and they carried over when I moved to the castle.

The only reason I had decided these dreams were strange was because of how they made me feel afterwards. Had I known just what I'd been dreaming about, I would've probably been more horrified than excited.

Or maybe not, now that I think about it.

In any case, this wouldn't become an issue until a bit later, after I'd been living at the castle for awhile. Despite all the weirdness and supposed trauma I went through, I was happy.

I had shot straight past my dream of getting into Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, and had gained the miraculous honor of being tutored by Celestia herself. It really was an impossible dream come true, and for the first few days I lived in the castle, I could hardly believe all of it was real.

Unfortunately, reality had made itself all too apparent soon enough, and I quickly found myself crashing headfirst into it. With my new life in the castle, I had thought all of my problems were over, only to realize that they hadn't even begun.

My name is Twilight Sparkle, and what you're about to read is an account of my life, my sins, my rise as Celestia's golden filly, and my fall into madness and depravity as this sickness slowly takes hold of me.

Celestia, I know I don't deserve it, but please forgive me for what I've done.

Please...

Author's Notes:

You asked, and now here it is. Didn't know where to start at first, but I eventually decided at (or at least near) the beginning, so no jumping right into things from the get-go here. Hopefully you guys enjoy the ride.