"I cannot thank you enough for letting me share your room," Rarity chirped as they exited Fluttershy’s house. "I have no idea where Sweetie Belle and her friends ran off to, and I don't know what I would have done with myself if she had come home and I couldn't make it back somewhere more private. Or, Celestia forbid, she heard me and rushed in thinking something was wrong."

"It's no problem at all," Fluttershy responded, quite chipper, as she closed the door behind her. "And you did make a lot of noise at the end there. You even had me worried. I thought you hurt yourself since you used just your hoof."

"Eeh... yes." Rarity looked down and away, still fighting the shame that came with being overtaken by her urges so easily. "And I'm also terribly sorry about the mess."

"Oh, you don't need to apologize about that," Fluttershy trotted up to Rarity, already leading the way to her shop. "I gave you a blanket to sit on for a reason."

She giggled to herself for a few seconds and then whipped her hair back away from her eyes.

"One morning, I woke up and got myself ready to leave, thinking I could just ignore everything my body was telling me. I think I made it to the second to last step of my stairs before I rushed back to my room. I couldn't even climb up on my bed. Thankfully, I had kicked off a pillow in my sleep, but the floor was so hard on my knees. I didn't want you to hurt yourself the same way I did."

"I do appreciate your concern and support through all this." Rarity took a moment, lamenting on what she just shared with Fluttershy. "I still don't know how I feel about... this thing we're doing. As wonderful as it feels, it still feels so unnatural. And above all else, why are we doing it? What makes these urges spring out on us. Well... obviously, it has something to do with Justin and our peculiar affinity and desire to be with him. But if it has something to do with reproduction, then what are we supposed to do? Who can we turn to if we’re even to get a clue about what's happening to us?"

Fluttershy hung her head, still sharing some of those same guilty feelings and concerns.

"I'm afraid to ask Twilight directly. Not even because... I don't even know how to describe it. I'm so embarrassed about what we've been doing. Not just embarrassed, I'm afraid what anypony would think of me and—" She laid her wing over Rarity's back, sort of half hugging her. "Well, at least I have somepony who won't judge me and knows what dealing with this feels like."

"Yes, dear," Rarity responded with a sympathetic tone and nuzzled against her friend as they walked together. "I don't know how you lasted going through this alone for as long as you did. And it certainly is such a relief to have somepony to talk to about this. Even more so being able to find relief somewhere safe with a friend. I mean, to think we can feel so terrible and ashamed about it, yet still be able to talk to each other and even see what we're both doing while we... umm... what do we even call this."

"Hmm," Fluttershy thought about that for a moment. "Huh... You know, I never stopped to think of what to call it. After I couldn't find anything written about it, I got so focused on trying to figure out what was wrong with me to even think about what to call it in the meantime."

Rarity pondered all its attributes and results.

"I was going to say a hoof rub, but that could be for anything. And I wouldn't feel safe naming it after any of our feminine parts. That would draw too much attention and too many questions if some pony were to hear."

"What if we don’t name it after the touching and rubbing or the dirty parts," Fluttershy offered. "We can name it after how it feels."

"The shameful-wet- pleasure guilt-trip?"

Fluttershy lowered her head, feeling terrible when Rarity put it that way.

"I didn't mean the bad parts about it. After a few times of doing it, you don't feel so bad anymore. It's actually really wonderful to come home and let your heart tell you what it wants and indulge your body’s demands. I still feel terrible wanting to do those things on Justin. And it's everything I can to stop myself when I feel like all I want to do is throw myself on top of him and hope he wouldn't hate me for... being so disgusting."

Rarity sighed heavily, already regretting what she was about to say.

"You're not the only one who feels like that. " Rarity replayed her first experience this morning by herself and the follow-up with Fluttershy. "When we were in your room together, doing what we did, you told me what you think about and how you hoped it would be. And what you said wasn't too different from what I thought. Although, I tend to think more about Justin on top of me instead of the other way around."

"Really?" Fluttershy didn't know how to respond to hearing Rarity admit that she shared the same horrible interest.

"Yes. And for what it's worth, listening to you describe everything it..." Rarity mumbled something too low for Fluttershy to hear.

"It... what?"

"It made me want it more!" Rarity shouted, angry at herself. "I hate - " She closed her eyes and exhaled through her nose, trying to purge her anger. "I hate that I find the same thoughts so exciting. I mean, what sane pony would want to do that to another pony?"

"Or a handsome non-pony," Fluttershy replied, pleased with the thought.

"With our studly human, yes." Rarity agreed, matching her wingmare's tone. "It all seems so wonderful to daydream about."

"And such a rush to practice in bed," Fluttershy cooed.

A stroke of genius struck Rarity.

"How about a Wonder Rush?"

"Wonder Rush?" Fluttershy asked, somehow lost in the conversation now.

Rarity smiled at her friend, hoping she would go along with the idea.

"The name, darling. Wonder Rush."

Fluttershy giggled.

“I like it, and if anypony asks, we can just say it’s a joke between us. Justin and his friends seem to have a lot of those. Seems only fair we have our own.”

“Precisely, my dear," Rarity proudly praised her wingmare. "Soon enough, I'm sure we'll have this whole funny business put behind us, and we can look back and laugh at how silly we both were. And only we will know. Best friends who helped each other through their trying times."

They crossed the path back to the boutique and went in together to fetch the gifts of human clothes. Thankfully, no disasters befell the two on such a simple task. Though they narrowly avoid one as Rarity was tempted to share her drawings of Cerb. Perhaps tomorrow, when and if the mood were to strike her. For now, it would be best not to tempt fate by speculating the particulars of Cerb's anatomy with Fluttershy.

Arriving back to the festivities, the two fought their way through the crowds. At first, they were surprised by how packed the area was; even if it was a Pinkie Pie party, this congregation of ponies was ridiculous. However, the reason quickly became apparent.

"Higher!" A young colt shouted before being tossed above Cerb's head, laughing wildly as he felt the short moments of flight.

It appeared that many fillies and colts had convinced both Cerb and their parents to turn the human into an attraction. The attraction was of him tossing them around. Lumberman and Applejack had stayed behind to supervise and catch any youngsters that might slip through his grasp.

"He certainly seems to be popular with children," Fluttershy spoke up near the front of the line that had formed.

"They both are," Miss Cheerilee cheerfully said. "That Chris character seems to be winning the foals over swimmingly, too."

Rarity and Fluttershy turned their attention to where Cheerilee was facing. Chris had gathered a sizable crowd of the youngsters around him with Spike sitting front and center. It appeared that he was taking a lesson out of Sniff's playbook and was doing his own version of storytime.

"And then they heard two bangs. Boom! Boom!" Chris pushed his hands out and flashed his fingers open with each noise. "And Chunk ran over to his friends telling them that those were the real ones. Not like the kind you hear in movies and that the bad guys were trying to kill 'em. But they didn't listen, and they ran to the summer restaurant. Chunk stayed at the bottom of the steps while Mikey and the others tried looking through the window to see what the bandits were doing."

"What did Chunk do?" One of the fillies asked.

"Chunk?" Chris laughed. "Chunk ran over to a broken refrigerator to grab a soda. But the dope forgot that the place was closed for the fall. There was no soda. What he did find, though, when he jumped down and looked in an open garage door, was the same four-by-four he saw the police chasing after."

The fillies and colts all gasped.

"Yeah," Chris went on with the story, doing his best to animate the scenes. "He rushed over to tell his friends what he found, but they all ignored him and pulled him into the restaurant. He was scared and chattering like a monkey in a tree. He tried to tell them they should leave, but then suddenly Mama Fratelli was behind them, and demanded to know why they were there."

Cheerilee and the other mares and stallions were all just as drawn into the story as the foals. Then again, it was the Goonies, so why wouldn't it entertain them?

"Well, that's one way to get to know the townsfolks," Rarity said to Fluttershy, enjoying the spectacle the humans were putting on.

"It sure is," Fluttershy replied. "Let's let them know we're back. I'm sure Justin could use a break."

Rarity giggled, looking back to Cerb, who was doing bicep curls with two foals latched onto each hand. "I don't know about that."

Over with the tiny ponies, Cerb was having more fun than he would have liked to admit at the time.

"Uh, yeah. You kids getting tired yet?" Cerb asked the four tiny ponies latched onto him.

"No!"

"Nah ah!"

They all refused to say anything that could end their fun, allowing Cerb to continue flexing and showing off.

Rarity decided that perhaps Cerb was attracting too much positive attention from the local mares and moved in to extract him.

"Cerberus," She called out, walking past the line of foals waiting for another turn. "We're back, and we have the new clothes for you and your friends. I'm sure you would all like something fresh and clean to change into."

"Alright, looks like it's break time, " Cerb announced to the little ponies, much to their dismay and whines. "Nah- Nah. Come on now. I kinda live here now. We can do this again some other time."

The fillies and colts groaned but perked up when they saw Chris still going on with his story and ran to him to join in.

"Yo, Chris!" Lumberman shouted over, interrupting the story. "Our new threads are here. You coming?"

"Hold on, kids." Chris stepped out of story mode and waved off Lumberman and the others. "No, you all go on ahead. I'm gonna finish up this story, and then I'll head in."

No one wanted to force Chris away. He looked legitimately happy with all the attention he was getting. Coming out of his shell was something he didn't usually do sober. Who were they to hinder his progress and all the positive attention the audience was giving him.

"Aight. See ya inside, man," Lumberman shouted back, leaving him be with a quick wave of his hand.

"Tell Twilight I'll come back with Chris," Spike shouted over to the others. "I wanna hear the rest of this."

"Okay," Chris returned his attention to the audience. "So, Mikey quickly walked away, saying he was going to use the bathroom. But really, he was still following his map. He followed it down winding stairs to one of the bandits singing opera." He stopped to hold back his laughter as the audience started cracking up at the absurdity of such a random plot point. "So- heh. So... he continued down this dark cellar to see the bandit singing terrible opera, and throwing food at a deformed creature bound in chains to a chair."

"Cherry or the lime?"

Some pony asking questions about fruit gently roused Rainbow Dash from her nap. She groaned, not ready to get up.

"No... No food. Lemme sleep."

Then she heard something worth getting up for.

"Cherry, please," Becky asked sweetly. "Can Flurry have the lime?"

"Becky?" Rainbow Dash spoke up, excited to have her human back. She looked to her right to find Becky had taken Starlight's lounge chair. She blinked and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Looking again, she had Flurry Heart sitting on her lap and Shining Armor sitting on the grass next to her. Some random stallion handed over two bottles of soda, but he wasn't important. "When did you get here... and where's Starlight?"

"Well, wakey, wakey, Dashie," Becky greeted her pony guardian. "Drink a little too much while I was gone or did that blow to the dome finally catch up to ya?"

"Ha! As if," Rainbow Dash retorted. "A pony like me needs to be well-rested if they're gonna stay awesome twenty-four, seven."

"Right, Rainbow," Shining laughed. "And I'm guessing all those ice packs are what makes you so cool, huh?"

"Oh, come on," Becky butted in with a wide smile. "I'm pretty sure Dashie is the one keeping those ice packs cool."

Flurry Heart took advantage of the distracted human and reached for the glass now being held in hoofs reach.

"Uh, uh," Becky caught the reach just in time and pulled her glass back. "This one's mine sweety. Your daddy's got yours."

"Come here, Flurry, dear," Shining levitated the baby alicorn to him, setting her in his lap to give her a bottle with juice. "I don't think she's ready for soda just yet."

"Certainly not the kind we're having," Becky joked, raising her mixed drink. "You liking yours?"

"Hey-Hey-Hey," Rainbow Dash sat up in her chair and let her mostly melted ice packs fall to the side. "How much party you gonna leave me out of over here?"

"I dunno, how much you gonna sleep through?" Becky asked with a grin.

"Come on," Rainbow Dash stretched and put on her best awake face. "Now that your back, I'm ready to go."

"Well," Becky started to pour Rainbow Dash another drink. "I need some downtime to catch my breath, and Flurry Heart will be needing a nap soon. So you can chill with us for now."

"Yo! Beck-ay!" Lumberman hollered across the way. "Christmas came early this year!"

In the short time it took to leave Chris and get back to the castle, the rest of both groups, aside from Kelly, Starlight, and Big Mac, had found each other and were walking back together. They all followed close behind Rarity and Fluttershy and the packages of clothes they were carrying.

"Nevermind," Becky corrected herself. "Looks like we're taking this party inside for a moment."

The whole group made their way back inside, where they ran into the remaining three... and a fuck ton of alcohol.

"Holy shit!" Becky shouted at the display of what must have been over a hundred bottles of various bottles of liquor.

Lumberman leaned over to whisper to Becky.

"Don't freak out and pretend you know those all belong to us. It's cool."

Benny and Sniff looked on in amazement, but Cerb knew enough to cover for everyone.

"Damn, Kelly. I thought you said you were just gonna grab some JD, not bring out all this." He turned to Big Mac, hoping he would know to play along. "Dude, did she make you carry all the alcohol you two brought back?"

Big Mac's eyes widened, not expecting to be labeled an accomplice in this likely criminal act. He pulled a beer bottle from his lips and swallowed hard.

"Uhh... Eyup?"

Twilight didn't know how to respond to the widespread of bottles in her dining room.

"I didn't know you all had this many drinks. I only saw a few walking through your house. You didn't have to bring all of these here."

"Princes," Kelly called out, quick to step in and defuse the situation. "You're still getting to know us, but believe me; we don't mind sharing. And bringing this much here isn't going to affect our supply any time soon."

"Really?" Twilight didn't see how that was possible.

"Twilight," Lumberman spoke up next. "Believe me, if Kelly was going to rob us of our booze, she'd be looking for a new place to live already. This ain't no thing for us."

Benny still didn't have a clue about what was going on, but knowing his friends well enough, he wasn't about to screw this up.

"Kelly, you could have asked first—" He let those words hang in the air, gauging everyone's reaction to see if they would try to stop him. "—but this is a party, so... good call."

"Well... if you say so," Twilight said, accepting the gracious offer before noticing Starlight still stacking and organizing the bottles. "Uhh... Starlight? Do we need to worry about you being around so much..."

Starlight giggled nervously.

"No, Twilight. Believe me. I learned my lesson."

Rarity looked up to Cerb with a guilty smile.

"You don't mind if we—" She guided his eyes back to the bottles. "—have a little sip or two, do you?"

Cerb shrugged.

"Sure, just don't go balls to the wall."

"Is that a sports reference?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Are we gonna play that later or something?"

"It means don't go crazy," Becky quickly explained over the chuckles of all her juvenal minded friends.

"Okay, so..." Kelly noticed the bundles of clothes that were carried in. "If those clothes are for us, how about we all go get changed. And Starlight, you can be in charge of the bottles while we're gone. Make sure no one gets drunk in the time it takes for us to get dressed."

With that agreed to, Rarity handed out the clothes accordingly, and the humans all took themselves upstairs to change. Big Mac and Rainbow Dash being the exceptions, helping their human companions, left the others to review the collection of drinks.

Upstairs the guys were looking over their new wears.

"Dude, check it out," Cerb showed off his new shirt. "I think Rarity gave us all cutie marks or something. Their shoulder patches, but check 'em out."

They looked over their shirts.

Cerb had a shoulder patch of a three-headed bulldog.

"Hell, yeah. Devil dogs, bro."

Lumberman showed off a large hammer stitched into his.

"Ah... Lumberman... A hammer. I get it."

"Yer fucking kidding me," Benny groaned as he held up for the others to see three Oreo cookies and crumbs.

"Ah! Fucking cookie kisses!" Cerb shouted, making everyone laugh.

Then there was Sniff, who looked over his patch. He wasn't disappointed, just confused.

"I think Rarity made you two shirts, Benny. I don't get how this fits me."

Benny looked at the patch.

"A four-leaf clover? I don't think we mentioned the luck of the Irish to her."

Cerb cocked his head to get a better look and instantly grinned.

"Awe, yeah. She fucked up. That was supposed to be orange peels, probably."

"Orange peels?" Sniff looked over the patch again. "Egh? Oh! Fuck! Cus I smell like clovers to them. Fuck you guys, this is mine. Eat a dick, Benny."

Benny laughed at their oversight.

"Eat shit. Next shirt she makes for you is gonna be a crown in a bear trap. Fucking poacher."

They all turned away from each other as they stripped down and pulled up fresh new pairs of boxers and briefs that matched the ones they had washed. Then came the real test with new pairs of pants. Cerb and Lumberman each were given a new pair of jeans, while Benny and Sniff each got a pair of khakis.

Lumberman grabbed the last small paper-wrapped package.

"Fuck'n yes. Socks."

The socks were divided up for everyone, everyone but Benny, since he still had a full wardrobe in his house. Regardless, they were reminded how nice it feels to have a clean pair of socks again. Although, Cerb noticed something off with Sniff putting his socks on. He cracked a grin as Sniff wiggled his toes in the new socks, something he'd give him shit for the next chance he could.

"Oh," Benny just remembered a burning question he needed answered. "Where the fuck did all those bottles come from?"

"I'm not complaining," Sniff spoke up. "But yeah... who do I have to thank for this?"

Lumberman looked around the room to make sure the coast was clear to speak privately.

"So... Starlight wanted to apologize for the shit that went down with Chris, right? Well, apparently, she can make copies of shit: Magic or something. Don't know, didn't ask at the time. But, we gotta keep this on the down-low. Shit's probably illegal. So, thank her discreetly, and don't go blabbing about it. She's our only source for bootleg booze."

Sniff suddenly sported the biggest smile. "Jesus fucking Christ. This place keeps getting better and better. As soon as Twiggels figures out a way to get us home, we better make sure they let us come back to visit."

"What?" Benny shot Sniff a confused look. "Dude. The crash landing fucked us all up, most of us suffered some type of psychosis or loss of our sanity for no fucking reason, they almost killed Kelly, and I'm pretty sure we're not gonna get my house and our three vehicles back in one piece, if at all. But you want to make this your new weekend retreat?"

"You kidding me?" Sniff was still ecstatic. "The food here is fucking amazing, infinite booze, everyone-err pony here is nice as shit, and we got the hook up with royalty. Not to mention we're all ambassadors of our entire fucking planet with sovereign rights to land inside an interdimensional country... how can you not see how amazing this is?"

"I kinda agree with him," Cerb butted in since Benny refused to respond. "I like the ponies."

Benny didn't say anything, holding his tongue to avoid outing his friend for the conversations Cerb was having about his past issues.

"Yes... it's nice here."

"Okay," Lumberman decided to throw in his two cents. "Cookies, levers, and trying to bed a royal or two aside, even I see the appeal of coming back here."

"Seriously?" Benny scoffed.

"Dude, come on," Lumberman wanted everyone to have some middle ground here. "This place is chill as fuck. And after all the bad shit got settled... this place is fun to fuck around in. I mean, this place isn't as stressful or depressing as back home."

He turned back to Benny and spoke up just before a counter could be given.

"And come on man. Be honest. You're a lot less depressed when yer around Pinkie or Twilight. Hell, they might even be able to cure Becky. If not here and now, who knows what they can do with the help of real doctors if we can come back."

The room went quiet as they all mowed over Lumberman's points. Even Benny didn't have any more counters to throw at them.

Lumberman wanted to better drive home his point.

"Look. I don't think any of us are saying we're ready to pour sugar in the gas tank and take up permanent residency, but aside from the lack of women and pay-per-view tv... I can't think of a better place to be stranded."

Benny gave up whatever little fight there was left to have on this.

"Yeah, alright. You got me. Even I'm enjoying my time here. For the most part, at least. I dunno. There's just too much we don't know about this place, and I feel like we're all getting too comfortable way too fast."

"Hey," Sniff softly spoke up as he stepped up to the group. "I'm just saying. We lucked out with this disaster ending up the way it did. And I was the last person to ever want to admit that I'd be down with this. But, shit, man... I trust Twilight and all them. They could have burned us at any point in time. From first contact to pointing a twelve-gauge at their leader's head, they don't owe us shit. But they've been busting their asses to help us even before the shit with Kelly. And with every fuck up, they come back tenfold with the effort to make things right. I might be a bigger brony than Chris right now."

All three guys around Sniff busted up laughing at that last line he gave.

"What?"

"Oh, my god," Lumberman hugged Sniff from the side and leaned annoyingly hard into his shoulder. "You fuck'n had us until the brony part; ya goofy fuck."

Sniff frowned angrily. His well-crafted speech ruined with one bad line.

"Okay. Okay... Oh, man," Benny was almost in tears. "Okay, you convinced me. Weekend retreats and holidays in pony land from here on out. I'm with ya."

Even Cerb couldn't hold back. "I'm sorry, man. It's just too soon to be saying that shit. And coming from you of all people. God damn, I wish I would have recorded that."

"Alright, guys," Benny called out to his friends as he backed up to the door. "I feel better. Now, let's get back to the party."

Benny opened the door and stepped out, still failing to control his laughter.

"Bigger brony than Chris."

Lumberman followed just behind Benny, laughing harder after he heard the line repeated.

Sniff took a deep breath, feeling a little foolish, but forced himself to put that incident aside and get back into a better mood.

Cerb tapped Sniff on the shoulder before he could take his first step to the door. "Hey, real quick. I gotta get this out now, but I'm glad you took my advice, man."

Sniff rolled his eyes. "And what pray tell would that advice be?"

Cerb collected himself enough to speak clearly, but still sported an obnoxious smile.

"Well, I notice you were acting a little different as soon as I got here this morning. And then, after the big save with the party for Pinkie, I thought you probably did, but I didn't know until we got up here."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

Cerb snickered slightly.

"Hey, man. I'm not dog'n on ya or nothing like that. I'm just glad you took care of your shit and got yer mind straight. I also really hope you left your socks somewhere Twilight or her cleaning ponies won't find them. Because that would be fucking gross."

"Gawd, damn it." Sniff winced, embarrassed that Cerb noticed he hadn't been wearing socks when they came up to change. They were still in the guest room he used the night before. Stuck together and not fit to wear after he released his pent-up frustration into them.

"Oh, quit crying." Cerb put his arm around Sniff's shoulder and started walking him out. "What the fuck you think I did last night with the house to myself?"

"Shut up," Sniff groaned, feeling like a teenager getting busted by his parents walking in on him.

"I'll see if I can have Rarity make you a washable rag, so you don't have to hide your socks like a fucking twelve-year-old."

Returning back downstairs, the men strutted their stuff and fashioned off their new wears in the goofiest ways they could. But each one of them made sure to show their appreciation by personally thanking Rarity with a hug and complementing on how comfortable the clothes fit. Cerb was the last to do so, picking her up and letting her crotch rest on his hip, sparking a lot of embarrassment and the fear of invoking the need for another Wonder Rush in the fashion mare. Thankfully, the lady's return from upstairs drew everyone's attention.

Cerb turned Rarity to Becky and Kelly's line of sight as they were guided down the stairs.

"Hey! Is she talented or what?"

A big smile led the answer for Kelly.

"I have a clean pair of panties again. That alone makes her a ten in my book. The fact everything looks and feels amazing is a bonus. You have my permission to marry her."

The room focused on Cerb and Rarity. Giggles and laughs surrounded them, the joke only amplified by how he was still holding her. The bright blush shining through her white fur didn't help matters either.

Cerb laughed along and promptly returned Rarity to the floor. "I dunno about that, Kel. She's got a bit too much class for my white trash ass."

"Pft," Even if joking, Becky didn't agree. "Forget class. Cerb needs someone calm and sweet to keep him level-headed. Make the right choice and go with Fluttershy. I need her happy if I'm going to keep a steady supply of that tea, anyway."

Cerb couldn't help but laugh along, but also remembered the fight between Starlight and Rainbow Dash. They had come to blows from petty preferences not too far off from this. Seeing the same blush on Fluttershy only reinforced his decision to pump the breaks.

"Yeah, yeah. We're not playing favorites here. And we're not putting these girls head to head against each other. Let's just see the new outfits you got."

The girls made it to the bottom of the stairs and playfully showed off their clothes. Kelly sported a short pink skirt with a swirling red design that worked its way from the bottom right side to the top left hip. Her shirt had a similar design in the same appearance working from the right mid-drift to the left shoulder that had a patch of a single large water droplet.

"Looks like she remembered," Kelly joked as she showed off the drip marking.

Everyone that knew snorted and chuckled.

Becky, on the other hand, had a more modest cream-colored skirt that went past her knees. Three yellow tassels had been sewn into a belt strap that fell in layers over her left hip to give it more flare. Her shirt was a long thin sleeve, the same yellow color as the tassels, with an undershirt that matched the skirt. The only thing that stood out was a patch on her shoulder.

"I love it," Becky complimented the outfit. "But I don't understand the patch."

Everyone eyed the marking. It was three lines spreading out of what looked like an open book with the lightning bolt from Rainbow Dash's cutie mark coming out from underneath the book. It was visually appealing but wasn't at all self-explanatory.

"Well, you see my dear," Rarity stepped closer and made the patch glow in her aura. "All of you came here with a fun name that seemed to define each other, and I tried to capture those names as best I could."

"Like a cutie mark?" Becky asked.

"Nailed it!" Cerb shouted from behind.

Rarity giggled.

"Yes." She turned to Sniff - "Except for you, dear. As cute as 'Sniff' is, that didn't seem to be something that transferred over very well. And your noses are rather difficult to convey by illustration. So I decided to go with your scent, being how lovely it is."

Sniff brushed his hand over his patch proudly.

Rarity then turned back to Becky.

"But for you, I decided to go with what I've seen in you and the effect you've had on Rainbow Dash. You see, the three lines are a projection of power and strength, and the book represents knowledge. And, of course, the last part is from Rainbow Dash. You have been such an inspiration to her, and I couldn't think of anything more defining than what you mean to her. For the perseverance you've shown and the knowledge you've shared with her, it's easy to see why she admires you so much."

Becky looked down to Rainbow Dash. As cool as she liked to appear, she couldn't stop blushing and had her gaze lowered to the ground, looking extremely bashful.

"Awe... Dashie." Becky knelt down and wrapped her arms around the embarrassed mare. "That's so sweet of you."

Rainbow Dash fought silently the urge to fawn over the praise she was getting.

"Yeah... Well, you know. I think you're awesome and—"

"Hug her back, Dashie!" Pinkie Pie shouted.

"Yes, Rainbow," Rarity encouraged her. "Don't let the poor thing just hang there with her arms around you."

Rainbow Dash caved and returned the gesture, wrapping Becky in both her forelegs and wings.

"I'm so glad I met you, Becky. You're the coolest pony I've ever met."

There wasn't anyone who hadn't been touched by the display in front of them, although Twilight realized that one of them was still missing from the group.

"Wait, what about Chris?"

"Hmm?" Rarity turned around, not sure what the question was. "Oh! Yes, of course. I had a little trouble with Chris's design as well."

Rarity pulled open the last package she had held onto and pulled out a baggy long sleeve shirt. She held it out for them to look over. It was a black shirt with a faded tombstone off-center from the base of the shirt that wrapped around the right side. But the patch was something that was going to need some explaining.

"I remember one of you called him Dead Eye," She explained. "But for the life of me, I didn't know what that really meant, since both of his eyes seemed just fine. I stitched in a ghostly-looking version of what your eyes look like and put an X through it... I didn't really know how else to convey that it was dead."

Rarity examined the sea of faces that were gawking at her work.

"Do you think he'll like it?"

"Oh, yeah," Becky said with a satisfied smile. "He'll love it, alright."

Starlight trotted over and grabbed the shirt with her magic, pulling it closer to give it a better look.

"I think it looks amazing, Rarity. Would you mind if I gave it to him?"

"Oh..." Rarity wasn't expecting such a request. "Well, certainly. I don't see why not."

Sniff grabbed a blue bottle of Hypnotic and started towards the door. He turned and started walking backward to the exit.

"Well, let's get back to it, then. Once Chris is done with storytime, he can change into his new threads, and we can get this dance thing straightened out."

They all agreed and followed him out, most of them grabbing a bottle or two along the way. Small talk and the usual exchange of compliments went on between them over the clothes and how good the party was as they exited.

Sure enough, after storytime ended and Chris found the others in front of the castle, he was practically in tears after he was gifted the shirt. They even came with a pair of cargo shorts.

The rest of the afternoon was filled with snacking on the fan-fair variety of foods, sipping drinks, and either greeting new ponies or being escorted off in pairs to join them at a game or some other booth.

Throughout their relaxing, there was a constant exchange between Pinkie overly enjoying a drink, only to stop herself and quickly pass it off to whoever was closest. It usually ended with Lumberman having to step in and pull the drink away from Applejack, who was always ready to take it. It happened so often that Lumberman started to call her 'Apple Lush,' which had to be explained to her.

"Hey, Spike!" Applebloome ran over to the group. "Howdy, y'all. I hope yer having a good time, but we need to borrow Spike for a while. We need an extra set of hooves running the prize tables. Can ya come help us?"

Spike sat up straight, looking conflicted.

"Uh, well, I was—"

Sniff flicked one of the spines on top of Spike's head.

"Dude. That's a lady in distress. What you waiting for? Do what real men do and go help her out. You won't be missing nothing important by heading off to do the right thing. We're just chilling for right now. We'll party it up later tonight, or however long that takes."

"R-R-Right," Spike stammered out. "Lady in distress! Spike to rescue!"

Applebloome led Spike off to run the tables.

"Thank you, Spike. And thanks, Smelly! Save me a dance tonight!"

"Better bribe some ponies for their votes or hope you win the bid, young lady!" Sniff hollered back.

Just after Spike ran off it was 2:30, and Becky's alarm went off.

"Oh, crap." She felt over her pockets, not finding her pills. "Hey, can you go grab my meds, Rainbow? I left it in the room."

"Sure thing, Becks," Rainbow Dash flew off with a slight wobble to an open window.

The group watched, realizing too late that she had been drinking most of the day. The booze was affecting her just enough, despite how much they cut the liquor with soda or juice, that she clipped the window sill and toppled over inside.

Lumberman laughed but also looked a bit angered over the tumble.

"Okay. New rule. None of y'all are allowed to drink and fly."

Fluttershy lowered a Jack and Cola she'd been sipping.

"Why is that?"

Lumberman did his best to not come down on her like he would have any of his other friends.

"Because that's how people get hurt. Same reason none of us will drink and drive." He pointed over his shoulder to the three vehicles still parked out in front. "It's an accident just waiting to happen, and it's not worth the risk being that stupid."

They all remembered Lumberman's story of losing a cousin while in one of those machines but didn't know if alcohol was involved. But knowing how they operated, they could see the danger and didn't challenge the rule.

Rainbow Dash floated back down shortly after, handing Becky the proper dose she'd seen her taking before. She was then immediately told the new rule.

"What? Why not? I'm a great flyer," Rainbow Dash protested.

"Rainbow," Lumberman spoke up, not happy to hear her fight back. "Yer a great flyer and still ate it getting into the window. How would you feel if you did the same thing carrying Becky out of that window and dropped her because the alcohol made you sloppy? Or what if that was her last pill, and you dropped it?"

"But I—" Rainbow Dash didn't see any support from the group and didn't get any from Becky when she looked to her for help. "So, no flying at all? Because that's how pegasi get around about ninety percent of the time. Even if just barely off the ground. My house is a cloud, for crying out loud. How would I even get home?"

Cerb motioned to the group with a bottle of Jack Danielle's Honey in his hand.

"How about no high-speed flying when drinking or high-elevation flying without a designated sober flier to take them home? Otherwise, it would be like telling us not to walk home after a few drinks."

A frustrated grumble came from Lumberman's direction.

"Fine. That's fair. I'm not happy about it, but whatever."

"Umm. Excuse me?" A new female voice spoke up to the humans.

They turned their attention to a cream-colored Earth pony mare with pink and violet tail and mane, and three pieces of wrapped candy for a cutie mark.

"I wanted to introduce myself, and also find out where the nominations go for the dance tonight. A lot of the girls in town have been asking. And my name is Bon Bon." She bowed graciously. "It's nice to meet you all. And this is my roommate and best friend."

She turned and pointed her hoof to an empty space next to her.

"Ah, buck... Lyra!"

"No!"

"Lyra!"

"I said no!"

"Arg," Bon Bon groaned at Lyra's refusal to join her before turning to Pinkie Pie. "I hate to be a bother, but could you do that thing you do when ponies don't want to be good sports and join in on a party?"

Pinkie Pie stood up tall, throwing her drink up in the air.

"Already on it, Bon Bon." Pinkie saluted like she just accepted an order from Celestia herself, and dashed off in a blur.

The group of humans and ponies remembered the drink that was tossed and looked up to see where it was going to fall. Lumberman and Applejack looked to be in its direct path and covered their heads. Suddenly, Pinkie Pie was back, just as fast as she had left and stood up between the two with her mouth open.

She effortlessly caught the glass and all its contents in her mouth, all of which funneled directly down her throat.

"Mmm. Yummy!" She belched, ejecting the empty class from her stomach and catching it as it fell into reach. "Excuse me. Heh. Oh, give Bon Bon some Kahlua and Cream. It's like a liquid chocolate cupcake!"

She tossed her empty glass to Benny.

"Back in a jiffy!"

The humans sat silent, stuck in awe, and bewilderment at the enigma that is Pinkie Pie.

Twilight grinned sheepishly.

"Don't worry. You'll get used to that."

"No, they won't," Starlight countered, knocking back the last bit of her Jack Danielle's honey.

Lyra's voice grew louder and louder at an alarming rate that preceded a blur of cyan and pink with a small dust trail.

"No! No! No! No! No!"

"Hurray! Lyra's here!" Pinkie shouted as she dropped the disheveled unicorn on all fours. "Now she can meet all of our new friends! Everyone, this is Lyra Heartstrings."

She started pointing to each human as she called them out.

"This is Lumberman, and Chris, and Kelly but don't hug her too tightly because she got a booboo a few days ago,—"

"Pinkie." Twilight butted in, to no avail, trying to get her attention.

"—and this is my little BenBen, but only I can call him that, so you can call him Benny, and this is Becky. You can't hug her too tightly either because her lungs are feeling icky-"

"Pinkie." Rainbow Dash scowled in a loud groan.

"The really big one is Cerberus, and he's going to marry Rarity or Fluttershy—"

Two auras of white and violet took hold of Pinkie. The white around her muzzle and violet around her body, pulling her away from Lyra. A blue aura floated over her head, carrying an ice cooler, and dumped the chilled contents over her head.

"Sorry, she tends to go on and on like this unless somepony takes drastic measures." Rarity, Twilight, and Starlight all apologized over each other.

Pinkie Pie was released from the magic hold and shook the icy water off.

"Well, excuuuuuuuse me for introducing our new friends, you meanie pants."

"Pinkie," Benny said with a light laughter under his breath. "They don't even wear pants."

"Oh, right," She giggled."Well," She moved on to finish the last of the introductions. "This is Sniff. And that's all the humans that are new to Ponyville."

"What's wrong with their hooves?" Lyra asked, causing her to be elbowed in the ribs by Bon Bon. "Ouch. What? Look at them. They're growing weird tentacle things where their hoofs should be."

"For goodness sake, Lyra," Bon Bon groaned as she facehoofed. "Clearly, they're not ponies. Why would they have hooves? You never acted like this to minotaurs or griffins. And you know Spike doesn't have... gah... never mind."

Trying to salvage the introduction, Bon Bon turned to apologize to everyone.

"You'll have to excuse my friend. She's unreasonably nervous today for some indiscernible reason."

Lyra grumbled under her breath.

"They all have claws and hoof nubs."

"It's fine," Benny said, trying to lower the tensions. "We look weird and smell like fruit. Or at least Sniff does."

"Clovers," Sniff blurted out to correct this misinformation. "I don't smell like orange peels."

"Old orange peels," Cerb chuckled.

"Shut up, Old Spice."

"Sure thing, Lucky Charms."

Rarity brought a hoof to her temple.

"You all need to slow down with the nicknames. I'm having trouble keeping up with all of them."

"Awe, come on," Sniff leaned back in the grass, enjoying the banter. "Nicknames is just one of our many quirks. And you didn't seem to complain about Diamond Thighs."

"Well, I—" Rarity harumphed and pursed her lips. "That's beside the point."

"Wait," Lyra looked over the humans with a new outlook. "So you're all just a bunch of stranded goofballs and not interdimensional invaders?"

Bon Bon reared back and knocked Lyra hard on the back of the head with her hoof.

"Owe! What the hay?" Lyra winced, rubbing the back of her head.

"Seriously?" Bon Bon lectured her friend. "Be polite, say hello, and carry the candy. Thank Celestia you at least didn't screw up with the... Lyra... where's the candy?"

"You said you needed me here to carry the candy, so if I didn't carry the candy, you wouldn't—"

"Oh! My.... You are just the worst," Bon Bon was now focused on her incompetent unicorn friend. "I simply can't believe you. You knew exactly what I was doing and how important this was for me to make a good impression."

"I told you I didn't want to do this, but nooooo—" Lyra rolled her eyes. "I say one time that I'd like to do what you do, and somehow you think that means that you can pull me along on the craziest-"

"Craziest? You think this is crazy?" Bon Bon pushed her snout right into Lyra's face. "Seven lost friends cracking jokes and having fun with ponies at a Welcome Welcome to Ponyville party is crazy? Crazy is—"

Bon Bon was suddenly distracted by the sounds of slurping and crunching and a male voice asking for more popcorn. She turned to see all the humans and the Elements, plus two additional royals sitting back, sipping their drinks and passing a tub of popcorn amongst each other.

"Oh, dear."

Sniff popped a few pieces of popcorn in his mouth.

"Oh, please. Go on. This is the best introduction we've had all day."

"Yeah," Cerb said before passing his half-gallon bottle of JD Honey to Big Mac. "It's been all hand and hoof shakes or backstories and questions."

"This is entertainment for us," Sniff added in.

"Pull Bon Bon's hair," Kelly joked.

Becky held up a fist.

"No, punch Lyra again."

"No! Hug it out!" Chris shouted as he put his arms around Starlight to demonstrate.

"Tell her that you're only angry because you love her so much," Benny suggested.

"Oh, yes! Do the love thing!" Cadence joined into the barrage of inappropriate comments.

Twilight playfully waved a hoof for the bickering pair to carry on.

"Just pretend like we're not even here or that I'm taking notes."

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash perked up and looked to Starlight. "Maybe we should take them to where we went, and they can fight it out like we did."

"We could totally do that," Starlight said with a smile as her horn started to glow. She turned back to the pair of now frightened mares. "There's not too many craters, and I'm sure we didn't leave any fires. It should be totally safe."

"What kind of candy were you going to give us?" Lumberman asked, totally detached from the escalating intensity of questions.

"Candy!" Lyra shouted.

"Right! The candy!" Bon Bon nervously said louder than necessary. "We'll be back with your gifts."

The two mares ran off in a hurry. Their tails tucked between their legs, embarrassed and reasonably frightened.

Once out of sight, the group dropped their acts and started laughing at how well that worked.

"See, Twiggels," Sniff said, pouring her another drink. "Wasn't that a lot more fun than trying to break up their drama with calm and rational reasoning skills?"

"Ha-haa!" Rainbow was holding her gut from laughing so hard. "Did you see Bon Bon's eyes when I said they should fight it out?"

Starlight padded Chris's hand, still holding onto her.

"Did you see Lyra's eyes when I acted like I was going to take them there and told them about the craters?"

"I'm just glad I always keep an emergency supply of popcorn with me," Pinkie added in. "That was almost as good as watching movies back at your place, BenBen."

Cadence wiped a tear away from her eye.

"After all the times I've seen Celestia do something like this to the nobles when they annoyed her with their arguing, I'm so glad I was able to finally do it myself."

"Yes," Twilight closed her notepad, looking rather amused. "You were right, Sniff. It was fun to let them carry on like that."

"Didn't go anything like I would have expected, though," Chris chimed in as he went to make another drink.

"Really?" Starlight asked, still half laughing. "Why is that?"

"Oh," Chris cracked open another bottle of Grey Goose and started to mix an entire pitcher for the group. "Well, back on Earth. There was a running gag that Lyra was obsessed with humans and just went crazy over hands."

Starlight snorted.

"What? That's ridiculous. We've never even heard about humans until you all showed up. Why would you expect her to be obsessed with or even know what you are?

"Like I said," Chris finished his pour and capped the bottle. "—it was a running gag. Just a joke amongst the fans. But it was one of those things that I kept seeing so much that... yeah. Just stupid fan material."

"Well, those two did bring up one important thing," Twilight announced as she stood up. "We should set up a table for ponies to put their nominations in."

"Ou!" Pinkie jumped up with a shout, practically vibrating. "We still need to pick out who will dance with our humans, too!"

Starlight put down her drink and stood up, walking into the center of the group.

"Well, we should figure that out quick so we can announce who they are. Come on, girls. You too, Cadence."

"What about me?" Shining asked.

"Oh, we'll be fine," Cadence answered, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. "You can stay with the boys."

"Uh, not just the boys," Kelly said with a grin, raising her glass.

"Yes, of course," Cadence said with a slight bow of her head. "Oh,—" She turned back to Shining. "You should go check on Flurry Heart, too. I'm sure she's still napping, but we shouldn't leave all the burden on Twilight's guards. If she wakes up, I don't think they're ready to deal with a baby alicorn."

"Would you be against Granny Smith looking after her?" Applejack asked.

"Don't forget about Mrs. Cake," Pinkie Pie chirped. "She has two of her own about Flurry's age."

Cadence turned to Twilight, silently asking for her input.

Twilight nodded.

"They're both ponies you can trust, and I'm sure they'd be more than happy to help watch over her for the night."

Pinkie had coordinated with both mares prior to the party and knew exactly where they were.

"Mrs. Cake is still handing out goodies at the food tent, and I think Granny Smith is probably playing horseshoes at the gaming area."

"Well, alright then," Shining agreed, rising up to all fours. "I'll go ask to introduce them to Flurry. If they all get along, then I'll be right back with all of you guys—"

He turned to Becky and Kelly.

"—and girls."

Kelly took a quick look over the group and could see that there were a few expressions of waiting for the ponies to leave. Anxious to say something in private, by the looks of it.

"Hey, Mackie. Can you help him find Granny?"

"Euyup."

In no time flat, the ponies had dispensed, and the seven humans were sitting by themselves again.

"Hey, guys," Lumberman spoke up, knowing that they were alone.

"I was thinking. Something that Sniff said when we were changing upstairs."

"Bend over?" Kelly joked.

"Without you there to lube us up, Kel?" Sniff fired back.

They all laughed, but Lumberman continued.

"Nah. I know this sounds dumb, but we should do one dance with all them."

"You mean Twilight and the others?" Sniff asked.

"Yeah," Lumberman said it like it was obvious. "They all care about us, and the whole friendship thing they keep pushing. I'm just saying. I'm sure they'd really appreciate us showing'em that we appreciate them, too. Make them feel special in front of all the other ponies."

"You trying to embarrass Applejack again?" Cerb asked with a smirk.

"Nah. I think we're done with that game. But if y'all are down with it, I'd ask to do one song. You all don't have to join me on it, but I know it would mean a lot to ole Apple Hat."

"I'm down," Becky was the first to answer.

"Yeah, I know my two would like that," Cerb added in.

"Dude, I still say it's bullshit you have two," Sniff jokingly complained.

"Fuck you, dude," Cerb fired back. "You got two royals. Stop bitching."

"Yeah," Chris joined in. "Kelly has a side character, and you both have the show's lead ponies."

"Fuck you both," Kelly said with a laugh. "Big Mac took out three guards and saved my life. What'd you both get? An extra shirt and a free meal? My side character kicks ass."

"Hey-Hey-Hey." Lumberman broke up the dick-measuring contest. "This isn't about who's the best pony."

"Starlight?" Chirs answered as if it were a question.

Lumberman tossed a bottle cap at Chris.

"Sniff was right. Of all the places we could have been stranded, this is probably the best place to do it, and it's because of them."

Benny took a long swig of his drink, polishing it off.

"Alright, as the leader of this Embassy, we all represent. I move that we go forward with his idea. Anyone against it?" He looked around the group, giving them a good five seconds to speak up. "It's settled. We're doing this. Sniff, you'll head up working it out for the events with Pinkie. Don't give it away unless you have to. We just need to agree on the songs."

"I know the song I'm doing with Apples, and I don't want to hear shit about it." Lumberman firmly stated.

"What's up with all this intensity?" Sniff asked with genuine curiosity.

Lumberman lowered his eyes on his drink, swirling it slightly, thinking how he wanted to explain himself.

"I don't know about the other girls and how they've been dealing with what happened to Kelly, but I think Applejack has been legit traumatized by it." He gave everyone a moment to digest that, hoping they wouldn't have any immediate questions - "Just like Mac, she wasn't able to stop it from happening, but she also couldn't do much to help her either. Hell. Even Cerb had to carry you out the house."

He looked directly at Kelly.

"Then the magic thing that didn't work as well as they planned... She doesn't know how to deal with falling short every step of the way. And before y'all wanna jump in and tell her it's not her fault, and all the happy, feel-good shit, I already did that. And we all know that just saying the right words don’t always do the trick."

There was no explanation needed after that. After all the years of helping each other, they knew all too well that recovery wasn't as simple and easy as a pep talk.

"So, I've been taking care of her. Keeping her upbeat and not feeling alone like she did the night she walked out from our house after Kelly didn't wake up."

"And since you took care of her, now she's using you as a shoulder to cry on," Cerb spoke up, trying to sound sincere. "Not saying that to talk her down. Just saying that you're her emotional support right now."

"Do it," Kelly demanded. "I talked to Mac about everything, and I know how beat up he was that he couldn't keep me safe. But he's been making up for it by taking care of me now. He gets to see just how alive and not so fucked up I am. I can't imagine what she's going through. Especially since I'm the first stab victim in this world apparently."

"Rarity and Fluttershy have been helping me work through a lot of shit I haven't been able to since mom and Travis died," Cerb confessed. "Started right after we got you back to the house, Kel. I got bad for a while there. Just like them, I was blaming myself. Even after talking to Big Mac, I still kept losing my shit. Almost hurt Fluttershy in a flashback, it got so bad. So.. yeah. As simple as a dance would be, I know they'd appreciate it."

"I don't feel like an outcast here," Chris added, opening up. "People back home suck, and yes, I'm a pony-fag brony. But even here, I didn't change who I was or anything. And I know Starlight made it worse at first, but she's the reason I was able to go out and be social like I was today. I could never have done that back home. And I think I could start doing that when we get back."

Becky finally chimed in with her thoughts on the growing topic.

"Both our guardian ponies fucked each other up trying to take care of us. And I guess I'm pretty much a lady pony-fag, and... Rainbow Dash is all the things I wish I could be. Healthy... fit... successful... happy... hopeful..." She scoffed through a smile. "And somehow she's amazed by me... When the fuck has a college dropout and daughter of a dead beat junky with a death sentence ever been important to anyone other than you six? And shit. That tea Fluttershy got me... I'm still getting used to not hacking up a lung or choking in my sleep. Even if they don't have a cure, this is the best quality of life I've had in years. So, yeah. I'll dance till my legs give out if that makes'em happy for the night."

Sniff stared at the group.

"Well, now I feel like an ass. I just love the food and conversations."

"You love the attention," Kelly joked, poking him in the side.

"Ayyy," Sniff winced. "No, I'm serious. No, stay on topic. We're doing this and... aww, shit. Kelly... You can barely walk. How you gonna dance?"

Kelly shrugged.

"I dunno. I figured I'd just drink till my legs didn't hurt and push through it."

Chris reached over and tapped Kelly's bottle with his fingernail.

"Kelly, you'll probably end up losing the feeling in your legs before you numb out the pain in 'em."

"I ain't sitting this shit out," Kelly whined. "Especially if it means I'm gonna make Mac sit on the sidelines while you all get down and dirty on the dance floor."

Sniff could see how determined and upset she was at the idea of having to sit this one out.

"We'll think of something."

[Back inside the friendship castle]

Starlight took to mixing up another batch of drinks for the girls.

"Chris and Becky already have their partners picked, so we just need to focus on the other five—" She saw an orange hoof move towards the off-limits table and constructed a flyswatter, bringing it down on Applejack's hoof with a loud slap.

"Oww! Dang nab it!" Applejack rubbed her hoof, not learning her lesson from the last two times she was reminded to leave the bottles alone.

"—and keep an eye Applejack while we're in here."

"Awe, come on!" Applejack whined. "How ya gonna take me in a room with all this tequila and not expect me not to take a nip or two."

"That's just the thing, Applejack," Starlight lectured the Apple Lush. "I don't expect you to take just a nip or two. Lumberman said you need to slow down, and Kelly put me in charge of the bottles. So, just be glad I thought a tequila sunrise sounded good when we came in here. And be thankful Sniff told me how to make it while you're at it."

"Well, I don't see why we can't just nominate each other?" Rarity complained.

Twilight took her new drink with the complaints from Rarity hoof in hoof.

"Come on, Rarity. Not only would that look bad like we were playing favorites, that would also cut out Dinky dancing with Becky, and Derpy dancing with Chris. And that already looks suspicious that we're putting those two together for the first dance."

Pinkie had her attention divided between the conversation and a drink that looked delicious.

"Besides, Rarity. You and Fluttershy are both handling Cerb, so who would get the dance anyway?"

Rarity grumbled.

Seeing her reaction, Fluttershy padded Rarity on the back to comfort her.

"It's okay, Rarity. Maybe with all this rum, that barmare can have one."

"Riiiiiiight...." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "So, who's a good stallion for Kelly?"

Applejack quickly offered the most Apple answer she could think of.

"What about Big Mac?"

Rainbow Dash scoffed.

"Oh, yeah. That's not biased at all. And why didn't we invite him along to pick somepony for the human he's taking care of?"

"Awe, buck," Applejack took a hard chug of her drink.

"That seems like a pretty big oversight on our part," Cadence pointed out.

"Bulk?" Fluttershy meekly offered.

Rainbow Dash kicked up her legs on the table and leaned back in her chair.

"Bulk is like Cerb, only without fingers or the ability to not break whatever he touches. Next!"

Pinkie Pie sat up tall in her chair.

"Hey! How about Cranky Doodle Don—"

"How about a hundred and twenty percent of no. And slap yourself for even suggesting that." Rainbow Dash barked.

Twilight thought she had a good idea.

"I'm sure Dr. Hooves would love to—"

"Nerrrrrrd," Rainbow Dash belted out, instantly unimpressed. "Kelly strikes me as more of a spunky adventurous type.”

"What about Star Hunter?" Starlight suggested. "I've seen him flying around town all the time, and he seems like a decent enough stallion."

"Star Hunter," Rainbow Dash scratched her chin on that one. "He is a pretty good flyer."

"Now, who's being biased?" Twilight muttered under her breath before taking a big swig from her drink.

"And he sure did show a lot of dedication when Ponyville was selected to provide Cloudsdale with our reservoir water. And he was super nice to Fluttershy even before she helped us break eight hundred wing power. You know what? I think he'll be just fine. That's who I pick... So, who's next?"

"Wait? Are we not voting?" Twilight asked, sounding confused.

Rainbow Dash suddenly looked just as confused.

"Voting? I thought we were just nominating."

"Yes, Rainbow, dear," Rarity groaned. "First, somepony is nominated, and then there is a vote. Otherwise, we would have just said we'd be picking somepony."

"Well, why didn't we say we would also be voting, then?" Applejack asked, eyeing her empty glass.

"Good grief, Applejack," Starlight exclaimed. "How are you not stumbling around already?"

"Cuz I'm sitting down, Sugar Cube," Applejack coyly answered with a smirk.

"Ugh," Starlight groaned. "I'll be back." Without explanation, Starlight teleported out in a flash of light.

Everypony stared around the room, unsure of what to expect.

"So..." Cadence gestured to Twilight. "This pupil of yours. She normally like this?"

"Starting to look that way," Twilight answered flatly before taking another sip.

Another flash of light and a pop, and Starlight was back in the room.

"Big Mac said he was fine with letting Shining have the dance, but I told him royalty wasn't an option. So he settled on the unicorn Rare Find."

"Hmm," Applejack hummed as she thought about that. "He does business with the Apple farm. He’s also been a good stallion far as I can tell. Seems like the fun type of pony she could enjoy a dance with."

"Ooh! Ooh! Now let's do BenBen!" Pinkie Pie screamed excitedly. "I nominate Mrs. Cake!"

The room fell silent just long enough for everyone to wonder if Pinkie was already drunk or simply that forgetful.

"Ahem," Rarity cleared her throat. "Pinkie, you do know what the word 'biased means, don't you?"

Pinkie shrugged absentmindedly.

"When you buy something as advertised?"

"Pinkie," Starlight put her hooves down on the table. "Overlooking the fact that you don't know what biased means and why that means you can't nominate your boss, she's already agreed to watch Flurry Heart for the night."

"Oh, yeah," Pinkie lightly knocked herself on the head. "Wasn't that my idea?"

Ignoring Pinkie's poor display of intelligence, Fluttershy had a thought worth sharing.

"Well, if I remember correctly, Benny really enjoys his music. So why not a musical pony like Octavia or Vinyl Scratch?"

"That's a great idea!" Pinkie agreed. "But Vinyl Scratch will be working the DJ booth for the dance tonight. So I guess that leaves Octavia."

Rarity was looking at Applejack after they all agreed on Octavia.

"What about Lumberman? He's a very good dancer. Any ideas?"

"Amethyst Star seemed to take a shining to 'ole Woody," Applejack spoke up, scratching her chin and making a sneak move to rest her foreleg on the table, edging it closer to a bottle of tequila.

Fluttershy smiled and nodded.

"She was also very interested in his dancing. I think that's a good match."

"I think we should do Sniff next," Rarity suggested.

Twilight stopped mid-sip into her drink.

"Okay, any reason we're saving Cerb for last?" She asked, trying to sound cute.

The implied accusation almost brought a blush in Rarity’s cheeks, but she had some legitimate reasoning behind her approach.

"I'm not blind to what you're getting at, but you have to consider that Sniff is likely the easiest one to make nominations for. He's made probably the most substantial impact on ponies here in Ponyville with the shortest amount of time. He's a crowd favorite, for sure. And Cerb is a close second. However... as much I admit I tend to favor Cerb—" She sighed regretfully. “—Sniff can easily outdance even the best of what Equestria has to offer if the dancing is done on two legs. Cerb however... Well..."

Pinkie Pie giggled loud enough to pull the conversation to her.

"Cerb dances like a block of wood with legs."

"Exactly," Rarity agreed.

Fluttershy spoke up to defend her would be a stallion.

"Well, it's not all his fault. He's just so big and bulky. It must be difficult to move that much muscle gracefully. That, and I think he might have permanent damage to some of his muscles."

"Permanent damage?" Cadence spoke up with a high tone of concern. "What happened?"

Rarity hummed lowly, not wanting to get too deep into his back story.

"Well, to put it bluntly, Mr. Cerberus served in his kingdom's military after it was attacked. Thousands of his people, women, children, and other humans that came to help were killed indiscriminately. Sometime later, tracking down those responsible, he and his fellow warriors were ambushed… He lost many friends in that final battle. As for the extent of his injuries… Well… Apparently, not even his doctors understand how he was able to survive."

"We don't know all the specifics of how he was injured," Fluttershy quietly stated, taking over the explanation. "But from the sound of his story, they were some type of projectiles, like arrows or bolts. Whatever they were, they shot in through his chest and passed out his back. Or, at least most of them did. But if you know what you're looking for, you can see how some of his muscles with scars don't contract or respond the same way as the other muscles around them."

"Regardless," Rarity tried to get the focus off of the negative side of things. "We can easily find a pick for Sniff, but Cerb might require some more consideration for his limitations while dancing."

"What about Minuette?" Twilight suggested. "It might look a little biased since her and I were friends growing up, but she's always danced at every party I've ever seen her at. She could be a good fit for either Sniff or Cerb. Sniff, because she has the experience to keep up with him, hopefully. And Cerb, because she has enough experience to work around his limitations."

"Spring Forward is a good dancer," Cadence spoke up again, bringing all eyes onto her. "Well, I know I might not know either Sniff or Cerb as well as all of you,—"

She glanced at Fluttershy and Rarity.

"Especially you two. But I know that Spring Forward lives here in Ponyville, and I remember her from my wedding reception. She was a very kind mare, and she certainly enjoyed dancing from what I remember."

There almost seemed to be some type of tension between Fluttershy, Rarity, and Twilight. None of them sure on who to ask for which pony without stepping on the others' hooves.

"Ahem," Cadence cleared her throat to break the tension. "If I could offer a solution. To avoid the appearance of bias with the human you're sponsoring, Twilight, let Minuette dance with Cerb. He'll need the most help anyway. Spring forward should still be able to match pace with Sniff, so he won't be held back or look like Lumberman and start dancing over her hooves."

"The rotten snake in the grass," Applejack harrumphed with a blush.

All eyes turned to Applejack, sitting angrily with her forelegs crossed over her barrel.

"Whut?"

"Are you mad at Lumberman over that?" Twilight asked.

"You two looked like you were having such a good time together today," Cadence added in. "Did he do something we don't know about?"

"No-No, no," Applejack decreed, waving her hooves. "We had a friendly wager going on between us about who could embarrass each other worst... and I think he's winning."

Rarity seemed most puzzled by this.

"What did you wager?"

Applejack sighed, both out of embarrassment of the bet and to losing.

"If he wins, one free meal a day, any time he wants for a week. If I win, I get a thirty-minute massage from 'em, anytime I want, for a week."

"Oh, my," Fluttershy seemed enamored with that idea. "If his hands are anything like Cerb's, I sure hope you win."

That statement earned a series of questionable looks from around the room. Except for Rarity who mostly shrunk down in her chair and sipped her drink, hoping it would hide her face. Actually, even Applejack sunk down in her chair, looking both embarrassed and guilty.

Then the giggling started, but it was coming from Rainbow Dash.

"You had to make a bet for that?"

"What you laughing at?" Applejack snarled.

"Why didn't you just ask him for a massage?" Rainbow Dash asked, still chuckling to herself. "Their hands are amazingly therapeutic. Better than Aloe and Lotus. And I didn't even have to ask Becky. I just told her how sore my wings can get from my training, and she offered. Said whenever I wanted one, I could have one."

"They can't be that good," Twilight said accusingly.

"You sure do sound rather confident about that," Rainbow Dash returned sounding stubbornly dismissively.

Twilight rolled her eyes, not wanting to take part in such a silly discussion.

"For an undereducated egghead, I mean," Rainbow Dash teased.

Twilight groaned, doing her best not to be led on by the insult.

"I'm pretty sure you're just talking up Becky because you like her so much. Everything with you always has to be the best."

"Typical Twilight," Rainbow Dash continued, sounding just as cocky as ever as she leaned back in her chair, rocking it back and forth on the rear legs. "Too self-confident to entertain the idea of being wrong."

"I am not," Twilight protested. "And we're getting off-topic again. We're supposed to be deciding about the last dance partners for Cerb and Sniff."

"Hey, Rarity," Rainbow directed her attention to the shrinking unicorn. "If you agree that Minuette should be Cerb's dance partner, would you let Twilight show off the frilliest fru-fru dress you have?"

"What?" Twilight shouted. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Rainbow Dash took a loud sip from her drink.

"Well, if Rarity agrees, then that settles the matter for dance partners. And that just leaves a friendly little wager between you and me to prove that I'm right."

"What wager? Twilight asked, still agitated.

"If I'm right, and human hands give a better massage than Aloe and Lotus, then you have to wear Rarity's frilliest fru-fru dress for a week."

"That's so dumb."

"And be announced as Pretty Pretty Princess Twiggels Twinkles."

"This is ridiculous."

"And you'd owe me a hundred bits."

"Now you're just being stupid."

"But I'd wear the dress for a week if I'm wrong."

For a good twenty seconds, the room went silent.

"Rainbow Dash!" Rarity exclaimed after she finally processed what the rainbow mare was putting on the line. "You can’t be serious?"

Fluttershy sat up and turned her attention to Twilight.

"Oh, no. Twilight, we all think you're very smart. You don't have-"

"Not now, Fluttershy," Twilight hushed her friend, now interested in the bet. "And what else do I get if I'm right?"

Rainbow Dash leaned back farther in her chair, finishing off the last of her drink, smacking her lips obnoxiously.

"Not only will I wear a dress. I'll be your personal herald and proclaim for every pony to hear—" She let the front legs of her chair fall forward, slammed her glass down, and jumped up on the table, striking a dynamic stance. "Hear ye! Hear ye! I am Cutie Dash! The most adorable mare of Cloudsdale, here to present her excellency, Princess Twilight Sparkle!"

Rarity polished off her drink.

"Buck it. I agree to nominate Minuette. But, by all means, Twilight. Feel free to back out of the bet. I wouldn't think any less of your intelligence."

"Think any less of my?" Twilight furrowed her brow. How dare any of them even insinuate her having a lack of her intelligence. "You're on! Rarity's dress and a hundred bits you'll never get because I'll be taking you all over Canterlot." She announced, sitting back proudly in her chair. "I might even take a tour of the Wonderbolts' training facility. Lots of high-ranking members could use a visit from the Princess of Friendship."

"Eeeeeee!" Rarity squeed. "Princess Twilight Sparkle, touring Canterlot and Cloudsdale in one of my dresses for a week! This will be even better advertising than the Grand Galloping Gala!"

Fluttershy eyed the last bit of her drink and sloshed it around before downing it. She then gently wiped her lips clean and turned slowly to Twilight.

"Just remember. It's only a bet between friends."

Twilight's smug expression slowly melted away, realizing she had no idea what she was really betting on.

"Wha-Wha? Woah! Wait! Rainbow Dash! We didn't shake on it!"

Rainbow Dash scoffed.

"Ha! Who needs to shake on it when we have the Princess of Love as a witness?"

Twilight turned to her sister-in-law.

Cadence smiled the best fake smile she could.

"Don't worry, Twilight... I'm sure that Aloe and Lettuce are great at what they do."

"Aloe and Lotus," Twilight corrected her with a complete lack of confidence.

"Yes. Of course, they are.." Cadence unconvincingly replied while struggling to maintain her facade of a smile.

A low chuckle came from Applejack.

"If it's any consolation to ya, Twilight. Losing will never feel so good."

Sorry to all who were waiting for this one to come out. It took a lot longer than I had hoped for.

But otherwise... Yeah, there's a lot going on. Hope you all are enjoying the ride.

The Dance Part 2 and 3 will be up next. Followed immediately by the after part.