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Chocolate Milk

by Iorii

Chapter 1: Plain and Whole


“DISCORD YOU SON OF A BITCH.”

The draconequus looked up from his upside down newspaper, with a monocle, pipe, and all, his smug grin endlessly rising. “Oh, greetings my dear Anon, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen you last. Now, how have you been? The marefriend doing well?” He stepped off of Fluttershy’s couch, arms open wide to his non-equine friend.

The human said nothing, standing in the open doorway, his arms crossed, mouth still, and a rather angry stare boring into the malformed creatures head.

A normal looking table of oak with a pleasant, polished finish appeared out of nowhere, and Discord shoved his guest into one of the chair, seating himself in the chair opposite of him. “Now, now, don’t be so cruel to me, Anon! You must tell me, how has it been going on these days? I’ve heard that you landed a job in the castle, as the right-hoof man of the Princess herself! Although I must admit, I’m betting on how long you’ll be able to tolerate her presence, I know I’d lose to myself instantly.”

Discords grin slowly settled into a line, a comically large bead of sweat beginning to waterfall down his forehead upon realizing that Anon had let him finish his thought without any sort of interruptions or saying ‘fuck off, Discord’. The two fell into a stare at each other, the water pouring off of Discords head beginning to flood the room.

And yet, Anon sat still.

At this, the non-human sighed and leaned back, his forehead glistening with moistness. “Alright, you win. I concede. What’s this issue that has you oh so infuriated?”

“I will make your life a living hell, Discord.”

The draconequus felt himself lean back in surprise at such a direct threat.

“I know you like to play your little games, and trust me, I have my fun as well. But I think you might have, I dunno, crossed the line a little itty-bitty too fucking far, you know?” Anon couldn’t stop the venom from rising in his tone. “Sometimes, you’re so fucking blind to the shit you do, and now I have to console my marefriend because someone decided to throw her into a harrowing, horrifying plane of existence just to ‘see what happened’. You know what happened, Discord? I have to bring her to the psychiatrist every fucking week. I have to get her medication for insomnia. Does that sound like a fun little game to you?”

Anon slammed his fists onto the table, his breath ragged from his rant. The two stared at each other for what felt like infinity, the silence around them unable to be penetrated by even the sharpest of knives, the pressure in the room enough to pop open a jar with a stuck lid, the tension thick enough to be unable to be penetrated by another various sharp object that you might find lying around, like a pocketknife or something.

“You know, before we continue this, Anon, can you get me some of my chocolate milk? This tension is making me rather thirsty.” He waved his hand in hopes to dissipate the various non-physical things that permeated through the room.

Anon let out a long sigh and stood up straight. “Okay, fine, I’ll get your stupid milk.” He rose from the table, and went into the kitchen, rummaged around the fridge for about 43 seconds, before returning to the living room table with a jug of milk. Gingerly placing it onto the table, he turned to Discord. “Here’s your milk.”

Discord blinked. And blinked a second time. “Anon, I said for chocolate milk. Not for this...monstrosity.”

“What’s the problem, Discord? You don’t like plain, whole milk?”

“No, of course not!” All emotions that might’ve previously resided on his face had vanished, replaced by only disgust. “There’s no way I’d drink this! Get it out of my sight!” Teleporting to the kitchen, he threw open the refrigerator door and pulled out his chocolate milk carton, only to freeze on the spot as he picked it up. It felt...different then it should’ve. A sinking feeling, unlike any other he’d felt before, rose from the pit of his stomach. An odd, evil feeling rising from his beloved chocolate milk carton, one of pure horror and malice that nearly shook him to his core. He glanced back to see one of the few creatures he called a friend, Anon, grinning at him with a smile that held no joy, only pure menice. He turned back to his carton, and slowly looked in.

His chocolate milk carton was empty.

Dropping it to the floor, he whipped around to Anon. “What did you do my chocolate mi-” Only to be cut off from Anon shoving the milk jug in his face.

“I poured it all down the drain, Discord. Every drop of your chocolate milk: gone. Now you see this milk?” The frightened draconequus nodded. “You’re going to drink it.”

His pupils shrunk to the size of the head of a needle. “Y-you wouldn’t do such a thing.”

Anon dragged Discord to the table and forced him back into his chair, slamming the jug of milk in front of him. “Drink. It.”

Discord tried to voice his complaints, but his voice returned down his throat and threw itself into his stomach acid upon seeing the face that Anon made. Feeling real tears running down his face, he brought the jug up to his lips, trying not to puke from the smell alone, and took down a big swig. He clenched his teeth together as he swallowed the first mouthful of milk, and finally broke down into tears. “Why are y-you doing this to me, Anon?”

“You know why. Drink it. DRINK IT!”

Discord could only comply, feeling as his entire chest wanted to detach and run for the hills as the putrid taste ran across his tongue.

“Yes, yes, drink it all.”


“Discord, I’m home!” Fluttershy sweetly called out into the house. She felt herself pause in mild surprise, not seeing Discord in the living room or kitchen, nor appearing in front of her. “Discord?” Only then did she notice a faint sob coming from upstairs. Worry immediately reaching the forefront of her mind, she dropped her grocery bags and sprinted straight upstairs, accidently punting Angel Bunny right out the door as he waited un-patiently for his food.

Slamming open her bedroom door, she was taken aback by the sight of Discord curled up on her bed, sheet draped over him. She immediately nested up besides him. “Discord, what’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“I don wanna have milk annymore.”

Fluttershy wanted to ask questions, but realized that now was not the time. “Do you want some chocolate milk? I got some from the store today.” She was almost thrown from the bed at his very insistent nodding.

Moments later, she returned with a carton of chocolate milk, only for it to be ripped from her grasp and chugged down by Discord, with him falling asleep as soon as the bottle was empty. Letting out a soft sigh, she moved him into a comfortable sleeping position, and carefully tucked him in. “Tell me everything in the morning, mhm?” She whispered to his sleeping form.

He refused to say a word about the situation the next day.

Author's Notes:

I'm back, fuckers.

Listened to this while creating this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xu1VQpxJNwc

(The full album wasn't on yt.)

Yeah, I know, this one is a bit weird. Mistakes happen.

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