You are Anonymous and you never thought the dogs of the False Emperor could be such cool guys. The song wraps up and all of Ponyville is cheering like mad. You turn to Sergeant Infernus and the two of you eye each other warily. Slowly, you extend a gauntlet. He does the same. Just before your hands meet you both clench them into fists and bump them. In the grim darkness of the forty first millenium, there is only friendship. He speaks first.

”For traitorous scum, you’re not the worst musician ever. Even if you needed xenos help.”

”You kids these days wouldn’t know good music if it came up and bit you. I’ve been using my Blastmaster since before you were the distant descendant of the lustful twinkle in some hive ganger’s eye.”

You continue to stare each other down but you can tell he’s smiling under that helmet. He removes his helmet and you do the same. He eyes your various tattoos and scars.

“Well aren’t you an ugly one. I thought Slaaneshi whores were supposed to at least be pretty.”

”And I thought Disco Marines were supposed to be good at music.”

He glares at you. “For the last time, heretic, Voice of the Emperor! Not Disco Marines!”

You smirk. “Yes, but how much of the galaxy remembers that?”

Out of the corner of your eye you catch Twilight and the others making their way onto the stage. You whirl to face them.

“Tiny pony-xenos! Allow me to introduce Sergeant Discus Infernus of the Disco Marines!”

Twilight doesn’t look like she knows what to say. In fact, she seems rather dumbstruck.

”But... weren’t you going to destroy us?” she asks, confused.

”We’re actually just a forward scouting party for the main fleet.” Infernus replies. “We didn’t have any real intentions when we came here, but when we discovered the traitor...”

”Scouting for what?” you ask.

”The Imperial shipping lanes in the nearby sectors have been taking heavy casualties from Dark Eldar corsair fleets, greatly in excess of their usual activity. It’s reached a point that can no longer be tolderated, they’ve even been so bold as to invade nearby agri-worlds.”

You feel like you know where this was going.

”Do you know anything specific about the Dark Eldar?” you ask.

Infernus nods. “Their actions as of late don’t fit with their usual methodologies. They’ve been slaughtering their victims as opposed to taking prisoners and ransacking settlements while taking nothing. This is more typical behavior for Chaos raiding parties. They just go in, ransack, murder, and disappear. It doesn’t fit with them at all.”

”Almost as if they’re looking for something?” you ask.

Infernus narrows his eyes at you. “Do you know something about this, heretic?”

”Do you know what Kabal these xenos are of?”

”Yes, they are the Kabal of the Hand of Fate.” he replies.

”Of Archon Feanor the Kinslayer.” you say. “Brother, I do believe I can save you some time on your mission. Those same xenos are on this very world.”

”How do you know?” he asks.

”Barely two hours ago I encountered a mandrake.” you explain.

”How do you know it was these Eldar?” Infernus asks.

You lift your helmet for him to see and tap the gems set in it.

”Because these belonged to Archon Feanor and he very much wants them back.”

Infernus thinks for a moment. “Very well, I shall have our Astropaths send word back to-”

He's interrupted as a black claw bursts from his shadow grabs hold of his head, yanking him back. A gaping maw of razor teeth emerges from the shadow next, lunging forward to envelope Infernus’s head. Before it can bite down, though, its head disintegrates as a golden wub lance from one of the Disco Marines strikes it dead on. Infernus stumbles away, turning and bringing his Storm Keytar up to bear.

”MANDRAKE!” you shout.

The ponies still surrounding the stage are frozen in shock for the barest of moments, but when the monster’s head starts reforming they all scatter.

”The horror! The horror!”

Who the fuck just said that?

Before the monster regains its bearings you activate your raptor pack and launch yourself at it, jet-tackling it right off the stage. The two of you roll across the ground until you stop with the monster pinning you to the ground.

”A little help, please!” you yell as you grapple the mandrake.

The burning green runes about its form pulse and burn with malice as it attempts to overpower you. Another golden beam is fired at it but it simply contorts its body around it, avoiding the beam completely. Its grip, however, is broken and you manage to toss the screaming monster off. You get to your feet and heft your Blastmaster, aiming it at the reeling mandrake. Before you can fire though, it sinks into a shadow and shoots up right in front of you from your own shadow.

It knocks your Blastmaster away and the grapple resumes. You grip one of its spidery arms and have your other hand pushing against its face, trying to keep that slavering maw away from you. A sight behind the monster makes you grin savagely and through clenched teeth you growl at it.

“Whatever scrap remains of your black, twisted soul shall feed Slaanesh, monster.”

Suddenly a golden aura envelopes the mandrake and lifts it screaming and thrashing into the air.

”Anonymous!” a furious voice exclaims.

”Good to see you too, princess.”

Princess Celestia holds the thrashing mandrake suspended in the golden aura of her magic.

“What is this monster, Anonymous?”

”A mandrake.” you tell her as you walk over to her. “It is little more than a mindless killing machine. Destroy it.”

She glares at the creature and her horn flares. The mandrake screams as the golden magic tears it apart molecule by molecule until nothing remains.

”And those do not look like Dark Eldar, Anonymous. They look like your fanatical, xenophobic brethren.” she says, pointing at the Disco Marines.

Infernus walks over with his marines, hand pressed to the gashes in his forehead made by the mandrake’s claws.

”Care to introduce us to your friend, traitor?”

”Princess Celestia of Equestria.” she says, curtly.

”Sergeant Discus Infernus of the Voice of the Emperor chapter. These are brothers Interstellar and Remixar.” he says, gesturing to his men.

They both nod in greeting.

She nods back. “Now Anonymous, I just received a very disturbing letter. A letter telling me of events that you assured me were unlikely to happen.”

”Well it happened. The Dark Eldar followed me to your world and will probably kill anything between me and them.”

”Is there good news?”

”Depends on your definition of ‘good’.” you tell her.

”Go on.”

”Well it turns out these loyalists are the forerunners for an Imperial fleet whose objective is to erradicate said Eldar. I’m just not sure they’ll stop at one species of xenos.”

”I wouldn’t worry too much about it your... er... highness.” Infernus piped up.

Celestia leveled a flat stare at him.

“This wouldn’t be the first time a human has told me not to worry about something that I should very much be worrying about.”

”Well unlike the traitor, you can hold me to my word. The Voice of the Emperor has a nearly negligible presence in the fleet with only a bare few squads operating in it. The bulk of the fleet is made up of men far more reasonable than the Imperium at large.”

”You’ll have to forgive me for being skeptical, considering the past deeds of your kind.” Celestia deadpans.

”I speak the truth, princess.” Infernus insists. “The men of the Apriori sector are extremely open minded and cooperate with friendly xenos races quite openly. It also helps that these particular Dark Eldar are the mortal enemies of the Astartes chapter from that sector. I assure you they will do everything in their power to protect your people.”

”Hold on, there are multiple chapters comprising this fleet? Is the situation really so out of hand that so many Space Marines must be called to battle?” you ask.

”Our recon forces tell us that the Dark Eldar have a massive presence. I’ve never seen anything like it in all my days, they seemed to have formed a massive raiding fleet and it poses a threat to every single nearby sector. The Imperial Navy isn’t nearly enough to handle such a threat.”

”How big could their fleet possibly be?” you ask. “The xenos never gather in numbers so great.”

Infernus’s face grows solemn. “We estimate that the fleet comprises nearly half of Cammorragh. Whatever you did, traitor, you really rustled their jimmies.”

Your eyes widen in shock. “Half of... but that’s insane! That’s enough firepower to challenge a Hive Fleet!”

Infernus nods. “You really dropped the ball here, traitor.”

Only now does the full depth of your situation sink in. Half of Cammorragh! For Chaos’s sake the city was probably the size of a planet! There was no way you could defend this world against such a force. You look to Infernus in desperation.

“How big is your fleet? How many chapters?”

”I cannot say for sure, but the fleet is a sizable one. The main bulk of the fleet is made up of Guardsmen and Navy from the Apriori and Icelus sectors. The Astartes elements include two thousand Knights Inductor, fully two thirds of their entire chapter, as well as elements of the Voice of the Emperor, three companies of the Sky Serpents, and the Second and Tenth companies of the Emperor’s Nightmare.”

You take a moment to process this. “So we have the Reasonable Marines, the Disco Marines, the Pretty Marines, and the Narcoleptic Marines? Well, I’d say we’re proper fucked!”

Next Chapter: Lammoth (Scream To Be Heard!) Estimated time remaining: 3 Hours, 25 Minutes