The next morning, Discord, Big Mac and the girls awoke to the sounds of explosions coming from outside the Singing Siren.

“What is that?” Discord asked.

“An earthquake?” asked Fluttershy.

“Are we under attack?” Rainbow Dash inquired.

Discord and Applejack led the group outside, their bows and arrows drawn, expecting the worst. They followed Barley, Cinnamon Buns, and Lady Cashmere down the street, and their jaws dropped when they saw that the cause of the tremors was a brawl—right in the middle of the city square—and Spike was at the center of it! He cast off his robe (leaving himself shirtless once again) as Sunset Shimmer threw a fireball at him... and Spike ate it up!

“Oh, this is so gross!” he exclaimed. “Are you sure you’re a fire wielder, because these are the worst flames I’ve ever tasted!”

Spike slammed his fists together before taking up his wizard staff and he exhaled through the gem at the end, creating a stream of emerald green flames. He and Sunset had been up early, training with a guild of wizards, sexy witches, and warlocks—men and women who had dedicated their lives to the art, and practice, of magic—who had just happened to be passing through Selena’s Gate that day. The training quickly escalated to the point that Sunset challenged Spike to a fight and he came dangerously close to burning her.

Spike and Sunset had been doing some experimenting with their characters’ skills and abilities, as well as the rules and principles of the video game. After all, they and the rest of their party had cleared only the first few levels... and still weren’t any closer to the end. They had to find the way out, and fast, otherwise they would be stuck in the game forever. Spike learned that fire magic didn’t work on him; not only could he consume fire, but his lungs allowed him to breathe fire, his scales could dissolve fire, and his claws enhanced his melee attacks. As well as various degrees of fire magic, he had mastered the art of conjuring many different flavors of pies... but he wowed them by creating a pepperoni pizza!

After that, the wizards offered to make him a member of their guild—since one wasn’t considered a “full-fledged wizard” until one joined a guild—and they wanted a Dragonborn on their side. Even in this magnificent world, Dragons and Dragonborns were considered extraordinary, mystical creatures... and were rarely seen by human eyes. Unfortunately, getting into the wizard guilds was tough, especially the popular ones. Spike/Garbuncle politely refused, but they told him that if he changed his mind, they would put in a good word for him.

Spike learned from Micro Chips that there were no Beta testers for the game, so besides Micro himself, Spike, Discord, Big Mac and the girls were the very first ones to roam this digital world. Spike also learned that Micro Chips had created no cheat codes, no backdoors, and no shortcuts; nothing that could help them or give them an extra advantage.

Spike also noticed three little lines that ran parallel along the inside of his left forearm, from his wrist to the opposite side of his elbow, where his arm bent. He and all the other players had them. One line was red, the second line was green, and the third was blue. The red line was his health bar (anytime he took damage, it would deplete), the green line was his experience bar (every time he completed a task or defeated a monster, it would fill up), and the blue line was his mana/magic energy (which went down with each spell he cast). And if he ran out of health... there were no replays, and no restarts.

After retrieving his robe, Spike returned to the Singing Siren and sat out on the veranda, next to a dwarf who was halfway through a pint of beer.

“Away with you!” the dwarf grunted. “Didn’t your mother ever teach you to never bother a dwarf in his cups?”

“What, are you afraid I’ll out-drink you?” Spike asked. “I’ll buy your next mug if it will soothe your mood. Waitress, get this dwarf an ale, on me!”

“HAH! That’s different, then; my thanks for the drink,” the dwarf replied. “Now, what do you want?”

“Hear any rumors of note lately?”

“Yes. It so happens I have the vault key for a treasure chamber in the Hall of the Half-Orcs, an abandoned hold far to the north of here, across the Forbidden Mountains. Could be of some use if you’re ever there,”

Spike offered 4,000 gold for the key, which the dwarf thought was a fair sum. Spike finished his own drink and returned to the group, only for Twilight to ask him why he wasted his money on such a thing.

“Harpy,” he muttered.

“Did you just call me a harpy, dragon-boy?” Twilight shouted.

“And what if I did?” Spike replied. “What are you gonna do about it?”

“Sulfur-breath!”

“At least I’m not a spineless coward!”

“Would the two of you knock it off?” Rainbow Dash interjected.

“Spike started it!” Twilight snapped.

“You’re the one who was provoking me, you damn dirty dark elf!”

“And what exactly did I do to provoke you, you pervy flasher?”

And just like that, they were at it again. But they weren’t at it for long because Valkyrie came running down the street like she’d seen a monster.

“We’ve got a problem!” she screamed. “It’s Thrash! He’s back!!”

The mention of the word “Thrash” caused everyone in the street to gasp (among other things). Judging from their reactions, you’d think Thrash was some kind of demon. Even the air had gone completely still.

“He’s the best pirate captain in all the Realms,” Cinnamon Buns told Spike and his friends, “and more than a bit intimidating.”

“It’s him all right,” Barley added. “I know those footsteps anywhere.”

Captain Thrash was often described, at best, as “scary.” At worst, worse than the wildest animal, the vilest beast, and the evilest monster put together. Some said that he once took down three mountain trolls with a single kick! Thrash fought Garbuncle to a stalemate a few years ago. After that, he caught a bard walking around naked, so he decided to beat him up. He also punched a female elf for coming onto him... of course, she deserved it.

When Thrash finally came into view, they were surprised that he was not anything like they had imagined. He was a handsome human man with handsome black hair and a sophisticated beard—like one of the protagonists from one of Fluttershy’s smutty romance novels—clothed in royal blue and royal purple, a major color clash but he somehow pulled the look off; heavy black leather boots with gold buckles, and the sabre at his side was as big as his leg.

“I’m back, bitches,” he said. “Where are the Dukes?”

“Welcome back, Captain,” Lady Cashmere greeted him. “The Dukes are in session right now.”

“Of course,” Thrash replied, as if he expected nothing less.

“What’s that?” one of the townspeople inquired about the humungous bone the Captain had been hauling around.

“It’s the skull of a Sea Serpent I killed. The locals were so thankful they decorated it and gave it to me as a souvenir,” Thrash replied. “Does anyone have a problem with that?”

“No, not at all!” they replied.

“I bet he’s heard about all that’s been happening lately,” Cinnamon Buns whispered.

“You think so?” Starlight asked nervously.

“Listen up!” Thrash shouted. “While I’ve been away, I’ve heard a few things. Word is you Harpers have been causing nothing but trouble lately! You may not give a damn about your reputation, but I do!”

Then he started tearing into them, one by one.

“Jacqueline, I suggest you start controlling your drinking! Dasheyes, keep your hands to yourself. Ruvia, if you can’t get rid of that disgusting habit, the least you could do is take it where the rest of us don’t have to smell it! Captain Wuzz...”

Thrash sighed.

“Don’t just sigh at me, say something!” Discord exclaimed.

“I don’t even know where to start,” Thrash replied. “You cause so much trouble I’ve almost given up altogether. And where are Sistine and Garbuncle?”

“Oh, hey, Thrash!” Sunset replied. “We’re just hanging out.”

“Good. It warms my heart to see the two of you getting along,” Thrash smiled. “That being said, it’s only natural for even the best of friends to butt heads once in a while.”

“I wouldn’t call us ‘best friends,’” Spike admitted.

“Lady Cashmere told me about the quests Alden’s offered you,” Thrash said. “I would like to do you a favor. While travelling, I overheard something that has me worried,” he went on. “Normally, I would consult with the Dukes before acting, but this is a matter of grave importance. Garbuncle, you, Jacqueline, Fauna and Sistine are the four strongest warriors in the Realms, and I would really like to help you... in any way that I can.”

The crowd murmured.

“Did that just happen?”

“Thrash offering them help?”

“That’s definitely a first,”

“I’ll meet you at my ship in the harbor in three days,” Thrash told them.

After Thrash departed, Spike and company discussed how they were going to go about Alden’s various quests.

“It’s probably best if we split up,” Spike suggested.

“Good idea,” Rainbow Dash agreed. “We can cover more ground and cause more damage that way.”

“I’ll take Applejack, Sunset, and Fluttershy with me to the Forbidden Mountains,” said Spike.

“Garbuncle, Lady Applesmith, Lady Sextus, and Lady Silentflyer working together? On the same team?” Cinnamon Buns thought out loud. “Even I never saw that one coming. This could be... the most powerful group of heroes the Realms has ever seen!”

“I’ll go with you, Spike,” Sunset said, “but only on one condition.”

“Shut up!” Applejack whispered to her.

“Oh?” Spike asked. “What’s that?”

“I want a rematch when we get back!” Sunset stated.

“What’s wrong with you?” Applejack asked. “You got a death wish?”

“I’m getting stronger, but this time will be different... because I’m gonna beat you!”

Spike smiled. “I know you’re improving, but as to whether or not you can beat me, we’ll just have to see. I accept your challenge!”

“Big Mac, Discord and I can go to Dragonblast Castle!” Pinkie exclaimed.

“Will we have to search through treacherous lands to find this citadel?” Discord asked.

“Beyond treacherous,” Pinkie replied.

“Typical,” Discord mumbled.

“I guess that means Twilight, Starlight and I shall go to Clover’s Hold to recover the Ruby of Femininity,” said Rarity.

“You better go with them, Dash,” Spike said. “They’ll be at each other’s throats, so I want you to keep the peace.”

“Well, I’d rather go with you, but if you say so,” she replied.

And the three groups went their separate ways.

Before Spike’s team left the city, Lady Cashmere pulled him aside.

“Garbuncle, word of your deeds has reached even the keepers of the White Tail Woods, well east of here. The druid Swan Song seeks your help,” she said. “I’ll mark the location of her home on your map.”

“My thanks, my Lady,” Spike replied. “Farewell.”

Applejack bought some bread, cheese, apples and carrots from one of the vendors in the marketplace before they left Selena’s Gate. They were just about to exit the city’s gates when a knight in silver and gold armor stopped them. But it wasn’t a knight; he was one of the priests of Celeste.

“Sistine!” he addressed Sunset Shimmer. “It warms my heart to see you again: this city grew a bit dimmer without your light. Things are well, I trust?”

“They are good, Horus,” Sunset replied. “Though, I left my home as soon as I received your letter.”

“Yes, the letter; I sent it too late. You may have already heard, but the Betrayer has been defeated. Still, though, Selena’s Gate is not at peace. There is much work here for a crusading cleric of the faith, Sistine,” Horus said. “There is a perilous quest our superiors in the church have asked that I assign you.”

“Of course,” Sunset answered.

“We have received word that Black Ice, a vile cleric of that foul goddess Argent, is raising an army of skeletons in preparation to invade Selena’s Gate. He is gathering these forces in an ancient mausoleum at the foot of the Forbidden Mountains. You must assault the unholy crypt and defeat him,”

Spike pulled Sunset aside and spoke to her in a whisper.

“The White Tail Woods isn’t far from here,” he said, “and we’re going to the Forbidden Mountains anyway, we can stop at this mausoleum on the way.”

Sunset nodded as she turned back to Horus.

“I accept, and shall leave the city shortly. But first, I would like to make an offering to the church,” she said.

“As you know, we abolished the tithe long ago... but the church is always grateful for whatever you can offer, Sistine,”

Sunset’s character was very kind and generous woman. Her offerings had been used to build (among other things) a home for the orphans of war veterans, four massive catapults emblazoned with the symbol of Celeste (each which occupied a tower on the walls of the city), a defensible wayside temple to Celeste north of Spork Village; whose clerics watched over passing caravans as well as nearby settlements and farmsteads, and the warship “Celeste’s Glory,” which patrolled the harbor of Selena’s Gate.

“I wish to offer 30,000 gold,” she said.

“I am grateful. We will all pray for your success,”

“Farewell, Horus,”

And with that, Spike led his party (Applejack, Sunset, Fluttershy, and their wolf companion Sandra) to the White Tail Woods.

It was the start of their quest for the Jade Tiger—the second of the four treasures Alden the Centaur had mentioned. They would reach the Forbidden Mountains if they could get through the White Tail Woods. For those dark, enchanted areas, Alden said, were filled with fairies... and orcs... and ogres... and goblins... and who knew how much worse.

They had been walking for what felt like hours when Applejack finally asked, “Spike, why did you pick us to join your team?”

“Well, because we’re dating, we’ve already slept together, and I know how good of people you are,” he answered.

“Was that a compliment,” Sunset flirted, “from the great Garbuncle?”

Spike just smiled and shook his head in reply. Garbuncle had earned quite the reputation. With the Silver Fangs gone, merchants could start running wagons to Shallowpond again. Still, it was too bad that Razer got away.

The White Tail Woods was a small forest that bridged the gap between Selena’s Gate and the Forbidden Mountains. Small size notwithstanding, it was a beautiful place, full of life, especially whitetail deer (the creatures the forest was named after) and a variety of birds, from cardinals and blue jays to woodpeckers and great horned owls.

“We’re certainly a lot safer here than we would be at the top of the Forbidden Mountains,” Spike said.

“But Spike, in order to retrieve the Jade Tiger from the Hall of the Half-Orcs, don’t we have to climb over the Forbidden Mountains?” Fluttershy asked. “I wouldn’t mind climbing them in daylight, but if we have to spend the night there I have a feeling that something terrible is going to happen. What do you think?”

“I think we should stop and rest,” he replied.

The four companions sat on the edge of a babbling brook and shared the food that Applejack had packed. As Spike helped himself to a drink from a tiny waterfall close by, he could have sworn he heard tiny voices; the sounds of giggling, gasps, and the occasional sigh. Very different from any of the sounds he knew that his three lady friends made.

While they ate, Fluttershy looked at Spike with concern. Since they entered the game, Spike seemed cold, distant, and depressed; and she wondered if it had anything to do with his mother. Just because they were coworkers, didn’t mean that they didn’t have their own personal issues.

And Spike had had more than his fair share of suffering... and loss.

“Spike, can I ask you something personal?”

“Fluttershy, you’ve seen me naked, you should know by now that you can ask me anything,” he said.

“Why do you get so upset when anyone mentions your mother?”

Applejack and Sunset both looked at Fluttershy like she had just stepped on a landmine. They expected Spike to explode, but he just sighed before answering.

“Before she died, my mother, my real mother, Barbara, taught me the joy of being able to write and a love of reading and literature,” he said. “When Celestia took me in, she continued to nurse those passions... I don’t know exactly when it happened, but I suddenly wanted to know what gambling was like... I used to hate card games with a vengeance. Even Go Fish and Old Maid. I blamed them for stealing my mother away from me. But later on, I got curious. I didn’t know why my mother loved them so much, so I figured maybe I should find out why for myself. I didn’t know what to expect at first, but after a while, I was surprised by how much I loved taking chances. It was a feeling unlike any other. My skills could have taken me as high and as far as I wanted. And that’s when I understood... I live for the day when I’ll finally see my mother, my real mother, again... I’m so pathetic!”

In his anger, Spike swung his staff at a boulder. He would have smashed the rock clean in half if he hadn’t felt the earth shake beneath his feet. He and the girls whipped their heads around to see a herd of elephants moving through the forest. They followed the elephants to a cottage in a clearing up ahead. They approached the house and saw a pack of wolves, a pair of rabbits, a fox and his vixen, a family of field mice, and a handsome stag surrounding it. And with them was a beautiful young maiden holding a wooden staff similar to Fluttershy’s, but she had brown hair and brown eyes, she wore tight brown leather pants, a matching halter top, which barely contained her big, beautiful breasts; a forest green cloak, fur boots and fur bracers.

“Well met, Garbuncle,” she said. “I am Swan Song, one of the caretakers of the White Tail Woods. I have been expecting you.”

“Expecting me?”

“Yes. Can you not feel the trees and the animals of the forest sing of your arrival? They believe it is you that will rid them of the evil that disturbs the harmony of these lands,”

“What is this evil they speak of?” Fluttershy inquired.

“The vile green dragon, Gostir, has taken up residence in the White Tail Woods. His very presence befouls the land. You must find and destroy him,”

A forest controlled by a green dragon was easy to spot: a perpetual fog hung in the air, carrying an acrid whiff of the creature’s poison breath.

“How do we find him?” Sunset asked.

“Follow the path past my home. It will lead you to where the dragon dwells. Be careful: many monsters have come to serve Gostir, and will try to bar your way,” Swan Song warned.

“We will return when the dragon is dead,” Spike replied. “Farewell.”

The most cunning and treacherous of their kind, green dragons used misdirection and trickery to get the upper hand against their enemies. Nasty tempered and thoroughly evil, they were honey-tongued, smooth-talking liars and masters of double talk who took special pleasure in corrupting the good-hearted, bending them to their will, and gaining wealth and power with as little effort as possible. Green dragons were easily recognized by their curved jawlines and the crests that began near their eyes and continued down their spines. They had no external ears, but bore leathery spiked plates that ran down the sides of their necks. They attacked with no provocation, especially when dealing with potential threats to their forest territory. They stalked their victims, sometimes for days; they hunted by patrolling from the air as well as the ground, and ate any creature they could find, but their favorite prey was elves.

Spike told Sunset and Fluttershy to hang back behind him and Applejack; mostly because Sunset’s character was a Sun Elf, and Fluttershy was a Half-Elf, but also because Spike and AJ were the stronger melee fighters... and they didn’t know what kind of monsters they would have to deal with.

A trio of tan-skinned hill giants prowled the path ahead. Hill giants were selfish, dim-witted brutes that hunted, foraged, and raided in constant search of food; blundering through forests devouring what they could, and bullying smaller creatures into feeding them. Their laziness would have spelled their end long ago if not for their formidable strength and size. Farmers feared and loathed hill giants. Where a normal predator might burrow through fields and consume a cow or two before being driven off, a hill giant would consume a whole herd of cattle before moving on to the sheep, goats, chickens, even tearing into fruits, vegetables, and the grains. And if a farm family was at hand, the giant would snack on them too. Fortunately for the four heroes, the hill giants were easy to defeat: it was just a simple matter of blocking their club swings and retaliating with quick hits.

Spike and the girls eventually reached the center of the forest, where they found the dragon’s cave. Unfortunately, another creature guarded the entrance. It was a small, hideous monstrosity that looked like a hybrid of lizard, bird, and bat... infamous for its ability to turn flesh to stone.

“What is that thing?” Sunset asked.

“A Cockatrice,” Spike and Fluttershy replied.

An omnivorous creature, a cockatrice’s diet consisted of berries, nuts, flowers, and small animals such as insects, mice, and frogs—things it could swallow whole. They would be no threat to anything else if not for their fierce and frenzied response to even a hint of danger. Cockatrice flew into the face of any threat, squawking and madly beating their wings as their heads darted out to peck.

And that’s just what it did to the four heroes. It came at them with such ferocity that it forced them to scatter. It went after Fluttershy, who had tripped over a rock. Spike aimed his staff at the beast as it tried to attack Fluttershy. Even the smallest scratch from a cockatrice’s beak spelled doom as its victim slowly turned to stone from the injury. But Fluttershy looked the cockatrice right in the face as she slowly got to her feet, never breaking eye contact with it. She stared the monster down and it slithered away in fright.

“And don’t ever let me catch you in this forest again!” she shouted.

Spike, Sunset and Applejack stared awestruck at Fluttershy, who brushed off her dress and led them into Gostir’s cave.

“Well, well, well. Quite foolhardy, storming my lair so. Your kind does not live many years. What, a handful of decades? One would imagine you’d be more careful with such a brief flickering flame,” the green dragon laughed. “What? Are you still here? Very well. I’ve little else to do... and besides, some of your equipment will match my collection nicely.”

Gostir wasn’t too tough on defense, but his poison breath was devastating. They couldn’t stand in front of his mouth, or they’d be dead; and if they went within range of his foot stomps, they were in for a world of hurt. The key was to find a sweet spot—which was at the side of his feet—where Spike, Sunset, and Applejack could hack away safely while his ground-based techniques missed.

They dodged the rain of poison until Gostir landed, then sprinted into position (coming from the side, not from the front) so he couldn’t get any hits in before they started attacking. When Gostir blocked, they just kept hacking, getting some solid hits when he finally gave up his defense to take to the air. Upon slaying Gostir, they found a tarnished copper key hanging from a chain wrapped around one of the dragon’s talons. It was the key to his treasure horde.

The treasure hordes of dragons rarely disappoint, and the pile of loot in the northeast chamber of the cave contained a great many items of value, including a +2 Remarkable Ring of Thunder (which increased its wearer’s Charisma by two points), and best of all – a coral and ruby-encrusted black and gold bikini of +4 Imperial Chainmail of Rage (for Applejack). In addition to an AC of 38, it could send her Barbarian Rage skill through the roof. In turn, she would be sending scum of countless varieties through walls. The heroes returned to Swan Song after defeating Gostir, and she rewarded each of them with 8,000 experience points. Even better, she strengthened Fluttershy’s druid abilities.

“You have done well,” she said. “The stain of evil already begins to fade. Listen: the spirit of the forest rejoices.”

“Yes, I can hear it...” Fluttershy replied.

“Of course you can. The woods, the earth, they are in your blood, Fauna,” Swan Song told her. “Listen to them. Listen, and learn to harness the abilities they reveal to you.”

“She will,” Garbuncle replied. “We both will.”

Suddenly, a herd of three white unicorns with golden manes emerged from the trees and trotted up to them.

“They will take you as far as the base of the Forbidden Mountains,” Swan Song said. “They know the way. After that, they will return to the forest.”

“Farewell again, Swan Song,” Spike said as Fluttershy ran into a beautiful meadow, her eyes shut tightly.

Opening her eyes, Fluttershy smiled. Wildflowers lined a stream and a waterfall flowed down the side of a hill. At the bottom, she found a cluster of butterflies resembling flowers, and one of them landed on her nose. It fluttered around her a bit, and then landed on her ear before tugging on her sleeve.

The butterfly flapped its wings as another butterfly fluttered over. More joined and hovered around Fluttershy, some pulling at her dress; and she beamed joyfully as the colorful insects lifted her into the air. Her timid expression melted into a joyous smile as they flew higher. The butterflies slowly returned Fluttershy to the ground and released her gown.

“See? Magic isn’t just some miraculous power,” Spike told her. “It’s a talent that only works when the flow of energy inside of us all and the flow of energy in the natural world are in perfect harmony. To perform magic, one must have a strong mind and the ability to focus. It should take over your body and come pouring out of your very soul! If all you do is worry, then you will never progress. Don’t let anything scare you; follow what you believe in! If you do, you’ll show everyone that a druid can be much more terrifying than any dark wizard!”

Applejack and Sunset smiled as the each mounted a unicorn and rode them down the road to the Forbidden Mountains. Spike was about to mount up and follow them, but turned back to find Fluttershy looking sad.

“Are you all right?” he asked her.

“Spike... if I had the courage to die, I wouldn’t be hiding within the safety of the city, would I? But, really, why can’t we just log off and leave whenever we want to? Why do we have to clear every level just to get back out again? Why do we have to die even though this is just a video game? What’s the point of going through all that, all this?”

Spike wished he could give her an answer.

“I’m afraid of dying in here,” she confessed. “I’m so scared I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“You won’t die,” he said.

“How can you be so sure?”

“We’re strong together, our margin of safety is way above average, plus you’ve got me out front. So you don’t need to force yourself to the front with me,”

“You really don’t think we’ll die? Will we make it back to the real world?”

“You’re not going to die. You’ll see, we’ll clear this game and be back with our loved ones soon,” he said. “As long as I’m here, you’ll be safe. We’ll all make it back to reality. No matter what, I will protect all of you. And that’s a promise.”

Fluttershy smiled, and Spike began to wonder if any of the others were afraid of dying in the game. But they still laughed, cried, and tried to do the best they could. He didn’t think about it like that until that moment. He climbed atop the unicorn and pulled Fluttershy up with him.

“Thank you, Spike,” she told him. “You’re so brave.”

“But you’re brave too, Fluttershy,” he replied. “Braver than you believe.”

---

In life, Clover the Clever had been a wizard of no mean skill, with a dark and ominous reputation. He dwelled in a great clock tower hidden in the depths of the Forest of the Forgotten, where it was rumored that he studied chronomancy and other strange arts. Twilight’s character, Therstine Read, served him as an apprentice, and wrote that black book she carried under his tutelage.

On their way to Clover’s Hold through the Forest of the Forgotten, Twilight, Starlight, Rarity and Rainbow Dash were ambushed by a marauding band of hobgoblins and six ettins (two-headed giants that were as dangerous as they looked). They were foul, ugly creatures with the crude characteristics of orcs. They never bathed if they could help it, and their thick skin was encrusted with a thick layer of dirt beneath the stinking hides they wore. Their long stringy hair hung in unkempt messes about their faces and their breath reeked from mouths filled with crooked teeth and tusks. The girls had no choice but to fight their way out!

They ran around the monsters and blocked their blows until they gave them an opening to attack. After they had torn apart their enemies, the girls started (metaphorically) tearing into each other.

“Teaming up with you is the worst idea ever!” Starlight growled at Rarity.

“I made a big mistake coming along with you!” Rarity told her and Twilight.

Their bickering eventually stopped when they were approached by a woman.

“Hello there, travelers,” she said, “one itinerant serf and wandering wastrel, at your service.”

Rainbow Dash asked the drifter if she knew the way to Clover’s Hold, and the serf was more than happy to show them the way.

“You know, Garbuncle wouldn’t be lost,” Rarity said.

“Don’t bet on it,” Twilight replied bitterly. “He doesn’t know everything.”

“And how would you know?” Rarity asked.

“I know him,” Twilight stated.

“You know Garbuncle the Great?” the serf exclaimed. “I mean, personally?”

“We travel in the same circles,” Twilight answered.

“What’s he like?”

“Big, tall, shoulders like an ox, has the strength of ten men, like that,”

“They say he’s got beautiful eyes... for a Dragonborn,” the serf sighed.

“Oh, sure,” Twilight scoffed.

“Is it true that he spends most of his time just helping people?”

“Oh, yeah, he’s very helpful,” Twilight said sarcastically. “He never stops helping people.”

“Well, I don’t think you know him at all,”

“It so happens I’m his best friend,”

“You are not!” the serf said.

“I am, too!”

“You can’t be,”

“Why not?”

“Nobody talks about their best friend that way,”

Twilight stopped in her tracks for a moment... long enough for Dash to lean in close and whisper into her ear.

“Burn,” she said.

Unfortunately, the women didn’t realize that they were being followed... by a female humanoid cat and her lizardman assistant.

“I’ve tracked Alden’s new allies to Clover’s Hold, Catrina,” he reported. “They must also seek the Ruby of Femininity.”

“That meddling Centaur,” Catrina meowed. “One of these days, I’m going to have to kill him for good. Of course, I’m sure he feels the same way about me. Rep, I don’t care what you do with any adventurers you come across, but get the Ruby! It’s crucial to the success of the greater plan.”

“Consider the deed done, Catrina,” Rep said with a bow. “I shall return to you when I have it.”

---

The first foes that greeted Twilight’s group in Clover’s Hold were suits of animated armor. Crafted with potent magic to follow the commands of their creators, animated objects (like these suits of armor) acted independently to fulfill simple instructions. When not commanded, they followed the last order they received to the best of their ability. In this case, it was to protect their master’s home. They required no air, food, drink, or sleep. And they were led by the ghost of Clover the Clever.

“You?” he directed at Twilight. “I did not think I would see you again, my student of old. But... what is that expression on your face? Confusion? Do you... not remember me? HA! Only a fool would disturb me here. My guards will see you out... or what is left of you, at any rate. Good day.”

The ghost disappeared and the animated suits of armor attacked. The empty shells clamored as they moved, heavy metal plates banging and grinding against one another like the vengeful spirits of fallen knights. Fortunately, they were slow, so they were easy to dodge. Starlight used her Animate Dead spell to summon an undead ally—a skeleton—which distracted the animated armors while the girls hacked the armors up until they dropped (becoming inanimate once again).

They walked down the wing to the first room and Rainbow Dash gestured for them to stop. She crouched down and carefully brushed her fingers over a large diamond-shaped plate in the tile floor. She took Twilight’s staff, pressed it down onto the floor plate, and huge metal spears shot up from the floor. Each of the diamond tiles had a booby trap in it!

“This whole room is rigged,” Dash said. “And who knows with what else. You girls wait here.”

“We shall follow in thy dainty footsteps,” Twilight told her.

As Dash cautiously stepped around the many pressure plates set into the floor, Starlight shot Twilight a look that said, “What the Tartarus?”

“If she wants to go on ahead, let her,” Twilight said, “better than us risking our necks.”

“Spoken like a true dark elf,” Starlight replied.

Rainbow Dash stuck close to the walls as she crossed the hallway. Not only were there blades hidden in the floor, but there were fireball throwers and floating eye disintegrator traps, too. Dash proceeded very carefully to avoid the tricky arrangement of traps. Just as she made her way through the safe path between them, another trap triggered: the pillar in the center of the room fired streams of arrows in every direction and she narrowly avoided them. Then the sounds of fireballs hitting the walls echoed through the chamber; another fireball trap. Dash passed by the statue after a fireball had been launched, across the statue’s line of sight, waited a moment to avoid taking damage (namely in the form of third-degree burns), and deactivated the trap before moving on to the next one.

The girls watched tensely as Dash disabled every trap and then signaled for them to follow her, right into Clover the Clever’s study, where he was waiting.

“You survived? You are more powerful than you appear,” he said.

“What’s happened, Clover?” Twilight asked. “Why can’t I remember you, or this place?”

“Heh. Heh-heh. Heh, heh heh heh!!! Yes, very well, I will tell you, Therstine Read. Yours is a noble name, which you might have found out had you not been turned away from Mount Aris; a name of princesses. You are no longer welcome on Aris--last of the great hidden cities of the elves... Your book that you hold so dear... all that work in the back, incomprehensible, a code that you devised, the symbols... that’s Shadow Magic,”

“I don’t... I don’t recall any of that,”

“It is dark, dark stuff, Therstine. A thing of Nightmare, that dark goddess who so loathes Celeste and her Sun. The Shadow Weave is an alternative conduit and methodology for casting spells, but dangerous and shunned by most who know of it. Do you recall much of Aris, Therstine; the last major elven settlement following the Retreat? It almost seems as if to speak of you is forbidden there,” Clover said. “It seems that you were exiled from Aris more than fifty years ago. Why? Some say you murdered your betrothed and his lover. I know this to be false. A rumor or perhaps something more... A deliberate twisting of facts to hide the truth? After your banishment from Mount Aris, you wandered the Realms for no more than a dozen years before making for this place. Many years ago, you approached me to serve as an apprentice. Me, Clover the Clever, who so many feared! I was impressed by your boldness, and accepted you on a whim,” he explained. “Oh, but I’d let a viper into my home. So much I taught you Therstine, the secrets of the dead, of the shadows, these darkest of arts... but your secret, that I had to discover on my own.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I am talking about Therstine Read the Man-Slayer, the butcher of humanity. You were exiled by your own kindred. Your radical, bloody view regarding the extermination of all humans across the Realms disgusted even them... You would have slain me once I taught you all I could, and used my knowledge to further your ridiculous schemes. It is no small wonder that you escaped my wrath with only your memory destroyed. But this is easy enough to remedy. This time, Therstine Read, there will be no escaping me,”

As one could imagine, Clover the Clever was not an easy boss to beat. Starlight’s spells were useless against him, and he used a Mirror Image spell to make duplicates of himself! The girls quickly dispelled the fakes and focused all their energy on Clover. After defeating him, they gained access to his observatory.

As soon as they made their way up the stone stairs to the tower, Rainbow Dash extracted the Ruby of Femininity from Clover’s weather machine, and the pedestal that had been holding the Ruby lowered into the floor as the device fell apart. Clutching the Ruby, Dash felt a slight pain in her chest, but it quickly subsided. She hurried back across the room, only to be confronted by a humanoid lizard and a pair of archers dressed in black. The heroines recognized the lizardman as the one they saw back at Broodmare Manor.

It was Catrina’s servant, Rep.

“Give us the Ruby of Femininity,” he said. “We are many, with sharp blades and skins of iron, and you are so few. Leave the gem, and go.”

“Who are you, and why do you want it?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Like you, I seek the ruby for a master. But your master reeks of ill fortune, did you not know this? Those who aid Alden, die,”

“What do you mean?” asked Rarity.

“I mean just what is spoken. Those who serve Alden soon fall, much like the three that preceded you. They vanished with the Midnight Castle. You should choose who you serve more carefully,”

“Alden is not my ‘master,’” said Twilight.

“You are willing to die in his service: if that was not so, you would surrender the Ruby of Femininity. This is what I call a master,” Rep replied.

“Enough,” Twilight stated. “We won’t surrender the Ruby to you or anyone else. If you want it, come and take it from us, you scaly, lisping cretin!”

“Then you will perish. Attack them!”

Rep threw a ball of lightning from his hand, which could not be avoided, and the girls took serious damage from it. Fortunately, Rep didn’t have a lot of hit points, so rushing him with a knife in each hand was Dash’s best strategy. He teleported across the room, but the girls finished him in a few seconds. Once they slayed Rep, he seemed to disappear into the floor. And when he went down, so did his two henchmen. They eventually returned to Selena’s Gate... and to Alden.

“I see you survived Clover’s Hold and recovered the Ruby... impressive. Your reward is well-deserved. Here,” he said as he paid them two hundred thousand gold coins.

“You should know we were ambushed by black-armored men led by a lizardman,” Rarity shared.

“The Dark Web,” Alden growled. “I was hoping we’d be working too quickly for them to interfere. I’ll raise the reward on future missions to reflect the increased risk.”

“Who are the Dark Web?” Starlight inquired.

“The Black Network, as they were originally known, began as a group of powerful merchants, now their ranks include assassins, thieves, spies, and a small army of mercenaries. They’re a powerful political organization with the exclusive backing of the church of Nightmare, the goddess of strife and hatred,” Alden explained. “The Dark Web is always looking to collect objects of power, and will do anything to achieve their goals, no matter what. No doubt their agents have sniffed out our purpose, and now they look to steal the artifacts for their own.”

The four women began to worry, wondering if either of the other teams had encountered the Dark Web on their quests.

---

Meanwhile, Discord, Big Mac and Pinkie Pie made their way back up the Trade Way. Lightning flashed to reveal a ruin in the distance—Dragonblast Castle.

When the hero Daeros Dragonblast passed away, his castle was abandoned and inhabited by a succession of fell beasts and monsters. In time, a fiendish gate to the very Tartaruses was opened in the castle’s bowels. Armies purged the place, but the hordes of monsters continued to work their way into the castle dungeons below. It was then that a group of weretigers—generally neutral, ferocious hunters and warriors of a haughty and fastidious nature, that were tall, lithe, sleekly muscular and meticulously groomed—came to see themselves as the guardians of Dragonblast Castle. They tended the wounds of any who aided them in their fight, and allowed them to keep whatever treasure they found.

“A basilisk lurks in the depths of the castle’s ruins,” Discord said. “Alden saw the last of a dwarf clan who’d been turned to stone trying to storm the place. Stay together. There’s no telling what else we might run into--What was that?”

“I don’t know, but it didn’t sound friendly,” Pinkie replied.

The ruin was infested with orcs; savage raiders and pillagers with gray skin, stooped postures, low foreheads, piggish faces, and prominent lower canines that resembled tusks, who slayed anything that stood in their way. These goons lusted for death, and they respected and feared the size and power of evil giants and often served them as guards and/or soldiers. The orcs came in five flavors: axmen, swordsmen, spearmen, shamans and plain-old fighters. Meanwhile, fire giants prowled the castle courtyard. Ruthless and militaristic, fire giants were master crafters and organized warriors. Their fighting prowess came from endless discipline and training; they lived for combat and were shrewd tacticians.

Discord and Big Mac hunted the monsters down and slaughtered all of them before moving through the gates to the inner courtyard, up the steps to the castle’s central chamber, where a small family of half a dozen weretigers, male and female, stood watch.

“Greetings, travelers,” their leader said. “I am Thokar. Have you come here to enter the dungeons beneath Dragonblast Castle?”

“We have,” Discord replied.

“Very well,” Thokar said. “Mighty Celeste, place your blessings upon these brave warriors who would do battle with the foul denizens of Dragonblast Castle. May your victories be many and your death swift. Celeste be with you.”

The three heroes thanked the lycanthropes for their prayers and then made their way down to the fabled Dragonblast Dungeons.

Discord used the pillars as cover from a group of orc archers while he and Big Mac took out their fighters. He popped out, shot at the archers, and ducked back behind the pillar before they could retaliate. As they made their way through the tunnel, Discord noticed three black circles on the walls. He knew what that meant: proceed with caution or end up eating a triple dose of fiery death.

When they entered the wing that led to the castle’s tomb, a pack of hell hounds—monstrous, fire-breathing fiends that took the form of powerful dogs—attacked them. The hell hounds targeted Big Mac with their savage bites, and he was thankful for his iron armor (in no particular order, his helmet, his boots, his gauntlets, and his sword). He circled around them and stabbed at their flanks so that he wouldn’t get singed while Discord shot more arrows at them. When the hell hounds died, their internal fires consumed their remains in a billowing eruption of smoke and blazing embers, leaving nothing behind but scorched tufts of black fur.

When the trio reached the castle’s bowels, they found remarkably lifelike stone carvings of several dwarves, many of which were flinching and had missing pieces that appeared to have been bitten off.

Seasoned explorers regarded such relics as warnings.

No one carved statues of frightened warriors.

It was then that they knew they were getting close to the basilisk’s lair.

Basilisks were lazy and cowardly creatures, but evilly cunning. They made their lairs in dark underground caves where there was a ready and easily accessible food and water supply. They were easy to anger, though they never fought to the death if it could be helped.

Their only real “weakness” was a very slow metabolism, which made their movements sluggish and clumsy. As a result, basilisks relied upon their powerful magical characteristics for hunting and were unprepared for hard pursuit, as a result prey that fled usually got away unharmed. To prevent this, basilisks typically laired in hidden dens waiting for any prey unfortunate enough to wander in.

That’s when the three heroes spotted the large, dark orange, eight-legged reptilian horror!

Meeting a basilisk’s gaze was enough to trigger a rapid transformation, turning a victim into porous stone. With their strong jaws, basilisks could consume the stone, which returned to organic form in the creature’s gullet.

Fortunately, its gaze couldn’t hurt them if they couldn’t see it; Pinkie and Big Mac turned away so that it was looking at their backs, and it couldn’t bite them when Discord fired his bow at it. It was a long and difficult fight, but the heroes weren’t complaining... especially when they saw the treasure the basilisk dropped.

“The Scimitar of Strength!” Pinkie exclaimed.

They made their way safely back to the surface and ventured back to Selena’s Gate with their bounty.

“The Weretigers must have been sad to see you leave the halls of Dragonblast Castle,” Alden said. “But you recovered the Scimitar of Strength. Here, you reward.”

Pinkie started to worry with the rest of the girls. Spike’s team was the only one that hadn’t made it back from their quest. She hoped that they were all right.

---

Meanwhile, in a secret Dark Web meeting hall on the other side of the Realms, Catrina slapped Rep hard across the face, sending him to the floor.

“Let me see if I heard that right,” Catrina said. “You not only allowed some dark elf bitch and her friends to obtain the Ruby of Femininity but you also let them get away? Is that true?!”

“They don’t know about our plans,” Rep added. “And even if they did, they won’t be able to stop us.”

“We can’t afford to take any chances!” Catrina shouted. “Fortunately, we have a fallback plan. Capper, find Razer and inform of what’s happened. Rep, you do the same with Sylvia Broodmare. I will consult with our other allies. Go, now!”

“Yes, Catrina!” the two males replied.

Next Chapter: Ogres & Oubliettes: Dark Alliance, Act IV Estimated time remaining: 7 Hours, 52 Minutes