Chapter 2

Girls’ Night Out

     After an emotional afternoon, a night out in Ponyville seemed like just what the six friends needed. Dash realized it’d been a long time since all of them had been out together like this, and she offered to treat them all to salad and beer at The Rusty Bucket, her favorite little dive bar. Rarity, however, had other plans.

     “Darling,” she laughed, “The Bucket isn’t where you start your evening, it’s where you end up, doing jello shots and cart bombs…” she spoke from experience, that much was obvious, “let us kick off our night somewhere with a little more class…Baudelaire, perhaps? I know the owner, so everything will be on the house.” Baudelaire was the swankiest, most expensive restaurant in Ponyville – most ponies didn’t even know where it was – so despite wanting to ease her guilt by buying her friends dinner, Dash made no protest…not to mention she was a bit scared of disagreeing with Rarity at the moment. The others agreed it would be wonderful.

     “Let me just run on home real quick and put on something a lil more fancy,” said A.J. The others wanted to do the same, so they parted ways and arranged to meet back up in twenty minutes.

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     The outside of the restaurant was, in a word, unremarkable. They arrived at a large, old tree, a doorway roughly hewn into its thick trunk. The only markings were an ornate letter B cut into the wood above the door, and a small plaque with the address ‘955 Ukiah Street’ on it. The six ponies, all in their dressiest ensembles, ventured down the steps to a small foyer lit by two torches. Down here there was a large, polished mahogany door with a stained glass pane depicting Luna and Celstia raising the sun and the moon. Dash felt as if they were entering some strange hush-hush underground lair rather than a restaurant. Rarity raised a lacquered hoof and rapped on the door in three short bursts…knock knock knock…knock knock knock…knock knock knock. It was like some sort of secret code. Dash knew the place was exclusive but this was bordering on creepy. She almost felt like she was doing something illegal. The muffled sound of hooves came from within, and a slot in the door suddenly slid open, the torches illuminating a pair of eyes behind. It shut just as quickly, and after a few seconds they heard sound of a deadbolt click and the door slowly opened.

     As soon as they stepped into Baudelaire, the strange feelings were melted away by the warmth of a crackling fire in a hearth by the door and the dark yet cozy décor of red carpets on the floor and rich mahogany paneled walls, decorated with old portraits of stately looking mares and stallions. The doorman who had let them in was sporting a tuxedo. He nodded in acknowledgment as each one of them passed, making their way down another stair case to the dining room.

     No wonder nobody knows where this place is, Dash thought, it’s all underground.

     “Rarity my dear!” a delighted voice sounded as they reached the bottom. A large, pot-bellied stallion in a long-tailed tuxedo and a monocle came rushing over to greet them. He and Rarity kissed each other on both cheeks “And Mayor Twilight Sparkle what an honor! I’ve been hoping I’d see you in here eventually!” he lifted Twi’s hoof and kissed it.

     “Hello, Brand,” Rarity laughed. She turned to Dash and the others; “girls, this is Mr. Glass, Brandywine Glass. Brand, these are my friends…”

     “Oh my dear,” the portly pony said with delight, “no introductions are necessary, not with ponies of such renown! There’s not a pony in Equestria who wouldn’t know Ms. Twilight. And Ms. Applejack, I simply must get the recipe for your delicious apple fritters, if you’d be willing to part with it that is,” he winked slyly “we would love to serve them here at Baudelaire. And Ms. Pinkie Pie!”

     “That’s me! That’s me!” Pinkie jumped up and down excitedly.

     “You throw the best parties in town. If ever you should require a more exclusive venue, don’t hesitate to ask! The town’s greatest parties in the town’s greatest restaurant! Why we’d make quite a team!”

     This dude lays it on thick, Dash mused, letting a small scoff escape that she managed to disguise fairly convincingly as a cough. Brandywine turned his attention to her.

     “And my word, Equestria’s greatest flier here too! I’ve witnessed one of your sonic rainbooms and I must say it was breathtaking my dear!” Dash couldn’t help warming up to him a little as he kissed her hoof. The guy knew how to charm. When he complimented Flutttershy on her modeling work in Mane and Tail, she turned so red Dash was afraid she’d burst into flames.

     After this requisite bit of schmoozing, Brand showed them to their table personally. The place wasn’t crowded, that was for sure, but the ponies that were there looked like the types who would drop a thousand bits on a dinner. As they walked past the tables Dash heard snippets of conversation:

     “…the Mayor if I’m not mistake…

     “…a sonic rainboom, I saw it myself…”

     “…wearing one of her dresses right now!”

     “…seems they know the owner…”

     “Here you are ladies,” Brand had taken them to the back dining room behind a curtain to the VIP section, and he indicated a nice, large, roomy table, “I hope it’s to your liking?”

     “Wonderful darling, just lovely,” Rarity said.

     “I thought I’d take you back here for some privacy,” Brand laughed, “nobody wants to be signing autographs during dinner,” He winked again and Rarity laughed, as if they were sharing some inside joke. “I’ll send your waiter out post haste. Please relax and enjoy yourselves m’dears.”

     The VIP lounge was heavenly. The tables were slightly low to the ground, seeing as, in place of chairs, there were large, soft velvet cushions to sit on. Every object in the room, from the walls to the tables and cushions, was a dark red wine color, lined with gold. The lighting was soft and dim, and there was an old phonograph in one corner quietly playing classical music. Large velvet drapes separated the area from the main dining room.

     Suddenly the sounds of a bustling kitchen were momentarily audible as their waiter entered the lounge through a side door. As he stepped closer to their table the half-light revealed a tall, square-jawed stallion, his tuxedo only partially concealing a clearly muscular form. He looked more akin to a workhorse like Big Mac rather than a waiter. Fluttershy hid her blushing face and turned to Dash.

     “He’s so handsome,” she whispered. Dash couldn’t help but agree. When he reached the table, he bowed low and then spoke in a deep, dignified tone.

     “Good evening ladies, my name is Sterling, I will be your server this eve…”

     “Oh Sterl, you are too adorable!” Rarity laughed. Sterling seemed to drop some of his formal demeanor and laughed along with her.

     “It’s good to see you, Madame Rarity, it’s been too long,” he smiled.

     “Oh come now, I was here less than two weeks ago,” replied Rarity.

     “Like I said, too long,” he countered.

     “Tsk tsk tsk, you’re as much a charmer as Brand, and,” she leaned close to him in mock secrecy “much better looking.”

     “You are too kind,” he was beaming now, the redness in his cheeks only barely visible through his impeccably groomed silvery coat.

     “Allow me to introduce my friends,” chimed Rarity. She went through them one by one, until she reached Dash, “oh and of course, someone you might have heard of,” she prefaced, a mysterious impishness in her voice, “this is Rainbow Dash!”

     Sterling stifled a small gasp, and seemed, for a moment, completely befuddled. “A pleasure to meet you, Ms. Dash, or do you prefer Rainbow?”

     “You can call me Susan if it makes you happy,” laughed Dash, a bit confused. She looked at Rarity, who seemed to be having the time of her life.

     “Go ahead Sterling,” she said, chuckling heartily, “otherwise you’ll be distracted all night!”

     All of a sudden the last semblance of the handsome stallion’s propriety melted away, and he began gushing like a filly meeting her favorite rock star. “Oh Ms. Dash, how I’ve waited for this day, especially since Rarity told me she knew you, I hoped and hoped and here you are right before me!”

     Dash was completely taken aback, this turn of events being about expected as spontaneous combustion.

     “I’m such a fan of the Rainbolts! Your number one fan!” Sterling continued, “everybody always talks about the Wonderbolts like they’re so fantastic! I say pish posh! Can they pull off a double Sonic Rainboom? NO! Only you can Ms. Dash, and I’ve been to every one of your shows, and I do everything I can to support the team! I have all your hats and shirts and I even made a Rainbolts uniform for last Nightmare Night! But oh dear where are my manners, I never do this, please forgive me I’m just so ecstatic!”

     Dash had never received so much flattery – let alone from such a handsome pony – in her whole life, and she wasn’t sure who was more embarrassed, herself or the now ruby-red-faced waiter. Sterling looked again at Rarity, as if asking for permission. She had been laughing the whole time and was now on the verge of hysteria.

     “Oh go ahead,” she chortled, “but you’re only inflating her ego, you know!”

     Sterling pulled from his inner coat pocket a glossy photo of Rainbow Dash, as well as a marker, and gently set them on the table in front of her. He grinned, obviously mortified. Dash batted her eyelashes and laughed awkwardly. To Sterling, she wrote, my #1 fan – Rainbow Dash, she signed her name with a flourish and gave the photo back to the tall silver pony, who looked like he was on the verge of jumping with giddiness.

     “Oh! Thank you thank you Ms. Dash! I will treasure it forever!” Sterling tucked the photo very gently back into his coat pocket.

     “Ahem,” Rarity cleared her throat, “If you’re quite finished, Sterl…”

     “Of course Ms. Rarity. My apologies. Can I offer you ladies anything to drink?”

     “The usual for me,” said rarity, relaxing back into her velvet cushion. Dash was curious to see what “the usual” was.

     Twi and Fluttershy both ordered cosmopolitans, while applejack opted for a mug of hard apple cider. Pinkie ordered “the biggest most fruitiest drink ya got!” and insisted that it have at least three tiny umbrellas. Dash, not well versed in the world of cocktails, decided to play it safe with a gin and tonic. Reassuming some modicum of professionalism, Sterling bowed and trotted off, promising to be right back, a noticeable bounce in his step.

     As soon as the door shut, everypony looked at Dash, expressions ranging from the incredulous to the amused.

     “Oh what?” she demanded, trying to keep cool, “I can’t have fans?”

     “That wasn’t just a fan,” Twi giggled, “he’s flat out in love with you, Rainbow.”

     “Ah hear the weddin’ bells already,” Applejack said with a forced grin. She could fool Rarity and the rest of them, but Dash saw genuine anxiety in her eyes.

     “Oh! Oh!,” Pinkie Pie jumped in, “you gotta let me plan the bachelorette party! And the wedding reception, and I can find some super cool decorations…”

     “Cut it out you guys,” Dash sighed, rolling her eyes in irritation. At the same time she allowed herself one little mental picture of Sterling and herself standing at an altar. It looked good, she had to admit. But no, there would be no such wedding, for her heart belonged to another. Under the table her hoof found A.J.’s thigh and gave it a comforting squeeze. Applejack relaxed, a tiny smile on her face.

     Sterling returned with their drinks, interrupting Dash’s musing. It turned out that Rarity’s “usual” was a glass of single malt scotch cut with a bit of spring water. She instructed Sterling to leave the bottle. Pinkie Pie’s drink looked more like a fruit arrangement than a cocktail. It was served in a glass that could, were it lacking a stem, easily be classified as a bowl. All around the edges were pieces of pineapple and melon, and to Pinkie’s delight, four tiny umbrellas. There was a big swizzle straw sticking out of it, and without waiting for a toast of any sort Pinkie began sucking down the orange-colored liquid.

     “Pace yerself sugar cube,” Applejack warned, “we don’t want to be draggin’ ya home on a dolly.”

     Pinkie laughed “I could drink you under the table,” she said dismissively.

     “Oh is that so?” A.J.’s eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared. “Tell you what sally, after we get done with this fancy-shmancy dinner, let’s get on over to the Rusty Bucket for a drinkin’ contest! If’n yer game that is…”

     “Oh I’m game,” the normally bubbly Pinkie said icily.

     “Ahem,” Rarity cleared her throat loudly, “could we please just enjoy our meal before you two go off acting like a couple of frat ponies?” The two of them managed an acceptable level of civility, but there was a lot of glaring and (mostly on Pinkie’s part) face-making. It was one of those situations that was half serious, half in jest, and for the onlookers, all entertaining. Who needs soap operas when you’ve got a group of friends like this? Dash thought, trying not to laugh as A.J. and Pinkie stared each other down.

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     All Rainbow Dash could say about dinner was “damn!” She’d asked Rarity to order for her, partly due to her familiarity with the cuisine, and partly because Dash had no idea what half the menu items were. Whatever it was that her fashionable friend bade the chef to prepare, it was delicious. Her appetizer consisted of veggies and potatoes a-plenty, all spiced with a delicious tangy sauce of ingredients unknown. Her entrée was a thrice baked potato with generous amounts of butter, sour cream, and chives, along with heavenly butternut squash, coated in caramelized brown sugar.

     Just when Dash though herself ready to burst, Brand came out of the kitchen door with another pony, whom he introduced as Chef Julienne, who all but demanded a detailed critique of her food. The others praised her delicious culinary masterpieces.

     “I love th…um…I love the sauce!” Dash slurred.

     “Clearly,” the chef laughed. Dash hadn’t realized how drunk she was. She just chuckled, patted her stomach, and smacked her lips. This seem to satisfy the chef. As her friends praised their own meals, Dash decided to take a little nap.