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Pound and Pumpkin Tales 2

by Never2muchpinkie

Chapter 70: 9-2: Hurting together, healing together

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“Mayhem?” Twilight said cautiously. He looked up at her. “Is this really okay?”

“Hmm?” he replied. “Is what okay?”

“Last week you told me Spring’s situation was personal to you. That’s why you pushed so hard, talking about your worst actions and sneaking into Flurry’s party even though it might lead to bad things for you.

“Is it really okay if I take the helm this time?”

Mayhem smiled at her and nodded. “Of course.”

She was a little surprised at his quick response. “Are you sure?”

He nodded again. “Yep! After all, I already built the bridge. You’re just doing maintenance on it. So I’m still partially responsible for whatever you accomplish.

“Besides, what’s most important to me is seeing her do better. That’s why I told her all that stuff. I can’t selfishly try to do everything myself when you have a plan and I don’t.”

“Okay. I was hoping you’d say that.” She rubbed his head. “You’re really coming along in becoming more mature.”

He giggled. “Thank you.”

She turned to Spring, growing serious. “So now let’s talk about you.”

“Oh, are you finally ready?” Spring replied dully.

She nodded. “Forest, I’m going to share my insights in regards to you. Now, I may not get everything correct, but do please just allow me to speak. You can correct me later, but I don’t think I’ll be too far off.”

“Okay, Princess,” he replied.

She then turned to Sweet Pea. “Sweet Pea, I know you care about Spring’s situation, but I’m going to need you to keep quiet and not interfere at all. Spring has no issues with you, so there’s nothing you can do for her. This is a matter between her and her brother.”

“Okay, Twilight,” she replied.

“I’m serious about this. If you can’t keep your cool then I’ll have to ask you to wait with the other children.”

Sweet Pea looked hurt. “But why?”

“I just told you why. This is a matter that needs to be settled between the two of them. You have no place in her guilty feelings, and trying to get in-between them will only interfere with her healing. That’s why I’m telling you to just watch and trust that I’ll help.”

Sweet sighed. “Got it,” she said quietly.

Twilight finally directed her attention back to Spring. “As I just said to your brother I’m only stating what I feel. This is backed up by some statements that were said, but I may not have the whole truth. However, I have been doing this for seven years now, and my insights are usually good.

“You feel frustrated that you can’t help your brother on your own. However, I believe you’re far off from the actual truth. I believe you’re doing exactly what you think you’re not.”

Spring gave her a flat look. “So I’m helping my brother by being a pathetic emotional wreck?”

“Yes!” Twilight said bluntly, and Spring’s eyebrow rose. “Do you believe you’re the only one who has suffered through this incident? Your pain is obvious. You feel guilt over starting the series of events that led to this incident. Unsurprisingly, you’re traumatized by this.

“However, I believe your brother is just as greatly traumatized by everything. After all, he has to live knowing he lost three months of his life that everyone else has.”

Spring turned away, guilt on her face.

“Pay attention!” Twilight said sharply, making Spring jerk up and look back at her. “Stop thinking about yourself for once. I’m talking about him now.

“I want to show you two important memories, and dissect what they mean.”

Her horn glowed, showing Forest in his hospital bed.

***

Forest’s eyes were clenched shut. “Maybe it’s true that you started the series of events that lead to this moment, but my own heart is aching too.” He sniffed. “I feel like I failed you.”

“B-but you rescued me,” said Spring.

“What does that matter? As your big brother it’s my job to be there for you. While I was spending my time in this hospital bed I could do nothing for you. I couldn’t be there to sooth your pain and hug you.

“All this time you’ve spent suffering, hiding your pain, and I feel I could have helped you through it so much faster if only I hadn’t been so weak.”

Spring got a pained look on her face. “Don’t say that! DON’T SAY THAT! You’re not weak! You’re the coolest and strongest pony I know! It wasn’t your fault.”

“If you can blame yourself for things then why can’t I do the same? If I had been just a little bit faster or stronger I could have gotten you out of danger without getting hurt myself. Then you never would have had to go through all this.”

***

The memory faded.

Twilight said, “You act like you’re solely responsible for everything, but your brother’s interpretation is equally valid.”

Spring tensed. “SHUT UP! No it’s not! It was me! It was all me!”

“Getting angry at me won’t change the truth. What you’re doing there is no different than what you were upset at your parents for. You’re just trying to deny the reality of what happened because you don’t want to harm him.”

“No I’m not! I started all of this! You said it yourself that I didn’t cause his accident directly, but it wouldn’t have happened if I had just listened to my parents.”

“And there might not have been an accident at all if Forest had been paying more attention.”

Spring took in a sharp breath, tears coming down her eyes as her eyes narrowed to slits. She charged out of her chair with a growl and headed for Twilight.

Forest jumped up as well to grab her, but Twilight used her magic to restrain him. She allowed the filly to hit her, Mayhem and Sweet Pea gasping.

Spring was panting for breath. “Don’t you… don’t you dare…”

Twilight rubbed her cheek a bit, but otherwise ignored the attack. “You don’t like the feelings that emerged when you felt I was attacking your brother. It was the same thing when that memory happened. You wouldn’t let him take the blame. You didn’t want to diminish his heroism, saving your life even at the cost of getting badly hurt himself.”

Spring hugged herself, quietly sobbing.

Sweet Pea went to hug her, but Mayhem grabbed her and shook his head. “Trust Twilight! Please. She’ll make things right. She gave her word as princess.”

The filly at first tried to pull out of his grip, but then gave it up. She decided to hug him instead.

“M-my… my brother is a h-hero,” Spring said through her sobs. “I won’t… I won’t let anyone talk bad about him. I don’t care if you are a princess.”

“You can hit me if you like,” said Twilight, “but that won’t change memory number two.”

She created the memory window again, and Spring reluctantly wiped her eyes to pay attention.

The memory was still in the hospital, but it was near the end.

***

“I feel guilty because of all the guilt and sorrow you’ve felt,” said Forest. “I feel like if I had only been better I could have saved you without getting hurt, and all of this could have been avoided.

“You’ve torn yourself to shreds emotionally, blaming and hating yourself.” Forest put his hooves out, pulling her closer. “I think I can forgive myself if you can do the same for yourself.”

“But I… I don’t…”

“I know. I know it’s not going to be something that happens overnight. Nothing’s that simple. But we can both take steps towards making it happen together. My heart is with you, and all I want is to just spend time with you. After all, I’ve been out of commission for three months. I have a lot of big brothering to catch up on.”

She moved her hooves, hugging him back. “I’ll try… for you.”

“That’s all I’m asking for.

“Do you want to hear my wish now?”

“O-okay.”

“My wish is just to see you smile. My heart is heavy with everything I’ve seen you go through. It’s been so long since I’ve been able to see that grin that lights up the world, and it would make my heart soar if I could just see it again.”

***

Spring sniffed, still a little angry at the mare. “Okay. So what of it?”

“You and your brother are no different than one another. Both of you are blaming yourself for the events of that day, and it hurts you deeply knowing that the other feels that way.

“Just listen to the things he’s saying. Your brother knows you’ve been suffering. He got to see your memories of that time, of things like thinking your parents were only nice to you because they spent so much of their day badmouthing you they got it out of their systems by the time they got home.

“At the time when you needed him the most, he couldn’t be there for you. He knows that, and it kills him inside. If he had only woken up sooner he could have helped you earlier.

“Far from just being a burden he has to carry around, I believe you’re helping him. Hugging you, telling you he loves you, assisting you through every step of your recovery… it’s all helping his own heart to recover. He’s making up for the time he couldn’t be there for you.

“With every smile he helps you make he can start letting the past go as well.”

Spring gazed deep into her eyes, uncertain about what she felt.

“You look like you don’t quite believe me yet. It’s all in the words he himself used. His heart feels heavy with guilt, but your smile ‘lights up the world’ and ‘makes his heart soar.’

“He said that this is a journey you’re going to take together, both of you improving one step at a time.”

She put a hoof on Spring’s shoulder. “Your brother has the rest of his life to go out in the world, but he only has right now to fight off your darkness. Once that’s taken care of and you return to your regular life then he can go out and you can separate. However, right now he needs you just as much as you need him.

“He said that he just wants to spend time with you, getting back some of what he lost the day of his accident. It makes him happy. I’d be willing to bet even your sadness makes him happy in a way.”

Everyone gave her strange looks. “Why?” Spring asked. “Why would that make him happy?”

“Because it gives him a chance to rescue you. It helps him to repay the debt he feels he owes you.”

She summoned the image of a heart. “Mayhem said last week that all our hearts are connected, and when one suffers all the other hearts it’s linked to suffer as well. It works in reverse too. When one heart smiles it makes the rest of them smile, making the bad things seem less heavy.

“Your hearts are linked together tightly, and the two of you are both fighting for one another. Your brother wants to help you to return to the carefree self of the past, and you want to fulfill his wish to see him happy by fighting to become that person.”

She turned Spring towards her brother. “But don’t just take my word for it. I believe that’s enough setup.”

She walked to Forest, putting a hoof on his shoulder as she looked him in the eyes. “Forest, I have only stated what I believe to be the truth based on what you said last week. If I really am correct in my assumptions then you need to understand what exactly your sister needs now.

“Last week you called your sister out for her role in your accident, something she needed to start confronting her guilt. You validated her feelings rather than dismissing her actions.

“This week, it seems to me that what she needs the most is for you to drop your guard. If you’ve been in pain like her, but have been pushing it to the side and acting strong for her sake, then you need to stop and be vulnerable. She needs to see just how much she really means to you so she stops feeling like she has no value.”

Forest nodded, and Twilight moved to the side.

The stallion met eyes with his sister. She was giving him a cautious expression.

As Twilight said, he had been acting strong for her sake in order to keep her spirits up, but deep inside…

Spring gasped as Forest’s eyes filled with tears and he began quietly sobbing. Her heart ached seeing his pain. “Forest!” She trotted over to him.

Forest pulled her close. “My feelings… they haven’t really changed from last week. I still feel like I let you down.

“When I’m completely alone my mind tends to come up with so many scenarios. I think about all the things I could have done differently so I could have spared you from the unbearable pain you’ve been living with.

“Crazy things, like I could have stolen some clouds from the sky and made them rain in the area so you wouldn’t fly there. Even though I know there was no way I could have predicted what you did and what would happen to me… I just can’t help feeling responsible.

“And even when I tell myself there was nothing else I could have done and my injury was probably unavoidable, I just tend to feel disgust for being in a coma for so long. I shudder when I think of what would have happened if Mayhem hadn’t come into our lives last week. I might have spent the rest of my life that way… and… and then…” He began sobbing hard.

“Forest…” Sweet Pea wanted to walk over and give him a hug, but Mayhem was still holding onto her.

Mayhem hugged her. “I know it hurts right now, but soon it will all be better.

“Your families grew up together, and he’s basically family because of that, but they need to settle this themselves.”

She returned the hug, her own heart aching in sympathy. She could recognize Twilight’s wisdom on a logical level, but from an emotional standpoint it was killing her not to be able to share her heart with them.

Spring felt lost for words. Her brother had been so strong the past week. He was always bright and bubbly, doing his best to keep her mood up. She didn’t know he was hurting like her.

When Forest got his emotions under control he let her go and sat on his chair, Spring quickly hopping up onto his lap. “I’ve been in so much pain,” he said emotionlessly. “I just feel cold chills going through my body whenever I wonder what would have happened if it wasn’t for Mayhem’s powers.

“If I never woke up then you would have spent the rest of your life deep inside this web of pain. Even with only three months of torture you’re still so badly affected it takes everything you have just to fight on a daily basis. Just to think of what you would have been like after six months or a year… it keeps me up nights.

“The role of a big brother is to be there for the younger siblings and protect them, but I couldn’t…” Some tears came down again. “I had to rely on some outside assistance to get back on my hooves. I am forever indebted to Mayhem for helping bring me back to you, but in my heart I wish I hadn’t needed him.

“I feel like a pathetic excuse for an older brother…”

Spring tensed, crying. “Don’t talk like that!”

“I can’t get you out of my head when we’re apart. I worry about you so much when I’m at school. It feels just like I'm still in the hospital. Stuck somewhere where I can’t be there for you, powerless to do anything for you... it makes me feel horrible until I get home to see you again.”

He put his forehead on hers. “When I see you after I get home it’s the most wonderful sensation.” His voice began to regain some spirit. “I open the door to see you waiting for me, and your face lights up with this big smile. Seeing you happy helps to put away my own Sombra. I can’t lose myself in the darkness when I know you need me.

“I know…” He sighed, pulling back from her. “I know you may feel like you’re dominating my life, but this is the way I want it to be. I couldn’t be there for you when I was in a coma, and I can’t be there for you when I’m at school, but when I’m done I want to spend all my time helping you fight your darkness.

“You’re not the only one fighting with a sense of worthlessness, Spring. I think those memories Twilight showed are a perfect representation of how I still feel. Your smile still lights up my world, making my Sombra lose its strength. As you strive to forgive yourself and I see you progressing, it really does make it easier to forgive myself for not being there when you needed me the most.

“Like I said back then, we’re a team. Our hearts are together. We’re walking hoof in hoof through the darkness together. You’re not just dragging me down and taking up all my free time. You’re the only reason I’m able to fight. I need you to be there for me, just like I am with you.”

Spring let out a slow breath, wiping away some tears. “You… you do?” she asked quietly.

“Don’t act like just because you’re a kid that your power is worthless. As Twilight said, even your sadness and weakness propels me to be more than I am. It gives me the chance to hold you and hug you and tell you I love you. When I can finally pry you out of the shadows taking hold of you, and see that wonderful smile return, it makes me feel so fulfilled.

“After all, you said last week that your feelings were still so heavy you didn’t know if it was possible for you to genuinely smile again. But we’re proving that false, aren’t we? If I’m able to make you smile then I know that it’s possible for you to overcome your darkness for good, and it’s a goal that I strive for every day. Every time I hear you laugh, or see you smile from the heart, it allows me to tell myself that I’m not worthless, because I can create a priceless treasure.”

Spring blinked a few times. “I… I had no idea you felt that way.”

Forest averted his eyes. “I… I was afraid to be honest with you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re dealing with a lot of guilt right now. I thought if I told you how I felt you’d just attack yourself every time you felt unhappy. I thought you’d feel like you were letting me down, which would only make you feel worse. Either that or you’d start faking smiles even when you were upset.”

He returned his gaze back to her. “But please believe me when I say that you’re everything to me, Sis. It’s okay if you’re not happy all the time. It’s okay if you get down on yourself. When those moments happen, let me play the hero and come to your rescue. Let me help myself by helping you.”

Spring’s head drooped. “All this time I never knew how badly you were feeling. I… I’ve been so selfish.”

“Don’t say that, Spring. You’ve been through a lot.”

She shook her head, looking back up at him. “No no no. I’m not saying that because I feel bad. It’s just… all this time I’ve kept asking and asking for hugs and comforting and for you to tell me you love me, but I haven’t done the same for you.”

She hugged him. “I promise I’ll start saying it back. Now that I know how much you need me I’ll start saying it more every day. I’ll give you hugs and lots of love so your heart heals too.

“I want to be there for you like you’re there for me. I want you to know how much I care about you and see you get better too. Now that I know you’re hurting like I am it’s even more important for us to work together so you get better too.”

Forest hugged her back. “Thank you.”

“I love you, Forest! I love you, I love you, I love you!” She looked up at him with a teary smile. “You got that?”

“I love you too,” he said with a little smile. “Forever and ever.”

They squeezed each other, closing their eyes and smiling.

Sweet Pea let out a relieved sigh. “I think they’re going to be fine.”

Mayhem rubbed his cheek against hers. “I told you so.”

Twilight rubbed his head. “So did I do good?”

He nodded. “Yep! There was nothing wrong with my bridge, after all. She just needed to see that they were both walking across to visit each other’s hearts rather than just her always pulling him over.”

After a minute Spring pulled away, her expression calm. “I’m sorry, Forest. I wish I had known earlier.” She put her hoof to his heart. “It… really hurts when there’s so much pain here, but it hurts even more knowing that someone else is going through the same thing.”

“It’s okay, Spring,” Forest replied. “I didn’t know some things either. I was just trying to protect you, but it seems I only made you undervalue what you do for me. I’m not as strong as I look, but seeing you in need makes me want to fight.”

“That’s why I want to fight too! I felt like I wasn’t doing enough, so that’s why Sombra started to get to me. Now… now I know that I have been helping you, so he feels a lot weaker.”

“You have been helping me, but just… please don’t push yourself too hard. In time you’ll conquer Sombra, but don’t rush it. Let me help you walk until you can stand on your own again.”

She nodded. “Okay, Forest.” She nuzzled his chest before hopping off his lap.

She walked over to Mayhem and Sweet Pea. “I’m feeling better now, so can we get to the wishes?”

Mayhem nodded. “Sure!”

Sweet Pea gave her a hug. “I’m glad to see you’re better. I was worried about you.”

“Sorry,” Spring replied, hugging her back. “I’m getting there bit by bit. It’s just… really, really hard.”

“Well, I’m here for you if you need me.”

“I know.”

With one last squeeze they released each other and headed for the room with the other children.

Next Chapter: The Spirit of Hearthswarming Estimated time remaining: 8 Hours, 39 Minutes
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