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Anon-a-miss: The Nuclear Option

by ChAoS pOnY

Chapter 10: The Second Wave

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The Second Wave


"Hey look, Kijo is posting again."

"Great now I feel bad for Trixie after reading that Trixie puts on free magic shows for children in the hospital and at the orphanage as well as at a senior citizen home, donates blood once a month, and donated her hair twice in the last three years to locks for love. God damn it Kijo!"

"Well there goes that theory, I was sure Sonata was the weakest one out of the Dazzlings but check out the security footage from the Sugar Cube Corner. She kicked five peoples asses as if it was nothing."


"Hey Sonata, Mr. Cake delivered everything and told me to give you this DVD as well." Aria said as she handed her the disk before grabbing the keys to the SUV. "What's on it?"

"Just my fight with the Rainbooms." Sonata said. "I figure we should muddy the water a bit by post stuff on ourselves and talked the Cakes into giving me it and not telling anyone by agreeing to not sue them or say anything about it."

"That's a good ideal." Aria said as she straightened her skirt. "So what are going to you post for me"

"That Gay Pride picture with you topless and doing a keg stand." Sonata said. "I figure if it doesn't work out with Trixie it would help you get a date and if it does work out you can play it off by acting cool."

"Fine, but I'm sending any creepy old men your way." Aria said before asking. "How do I look?"

"Like a punk rock school girl ready to get wild." Sonata said.

"Thanks." Aria said. "Be back soon."


"Whoa! Aria doing a topless keg stand. I think I'm in love."

"Dude, those three juniors, the flower trio, are working for the cops as jail bait online in chatrooms to catch pedophiles."

"Hey, check it out, Rumble fucking Scootaloo on one end of the sofa and Thunderlane fucking Cloud Kicker on the other and both brothers are like doing it in stereo even."

"Huh, never figured Bulk Biceps as the type to grow flowers, much less a new breed of roses that he named after his mother who taught him everything about gardening before she died of cancer."

"WTF! Kijo just posted a shit ton of stuff on the school board. The only two not on here is Superintendent Radiant Hope and Chrysalis Queen."


"Hey Sonata, I had an ideal." Sunset Shimmer said as they sat on the sofa. "I knew something was up with some of the people on the school board, but now we have all of this evidence and I was thinking why not use Kijo to clean up the school board as well. I mean, from what I read the only two not doing something crooked is the Superintendent and Chrysalis Queen."

"Why not, it sounds like fun." Sonata said as she finished yet another idiot in her game with a savage smile.


"Whoa! Svengallop better start running because Kijo just released a lot of documents that show he's been embezzling money for years."

"How the hell did Gladmane manage to stay under the radar for so long with how deep he was involved in the Las Pegasus scandal."

"Hey, Chrysalis Queen has a pet duck named Quackers, I guess she can't be all that bad if the only thing Kijo can come up with is a picture of Chrysalis cuddling her pet."

"How the hell did Kijo dig up who did the plastic surgery on Zesty Gourmand and find out that she use to be Forbidden Fruit and is wanted by Interpol in connection with the largest child porn ring in the world."

"Why the hell did Kijo put a picture of a tied up Adagio being carried away by a bunch of angry looking midgets dressed as leprechauns."

"Hey Svengallop use to run a record company that collapsed when all the money disappeared and he said it was his partner just before he died in a car wreck. I think the cops might have to reopen that case after he's been embezzling from the school district."

"Is that a video of Dr. Caballeron stealing artifacts from one of the burial mounds with a back hoe on the Buffalo Tribe reservation 20 miles down the road from the city."

"That's nothing, Kijo posted evidence of Dr. Caballeron buying new cars, houses, and other things after several tombs and burial mounds were robbed."


"SONATA, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU WHEN I CATCH YOU!!!" Adagio yelled as she chased the giggling Sonata out of the mansion and past Flash Sentry as he carried Pizzas towards the door just as a limo pulled up and Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Snips, and Snails got out with their bags and headed for the door. He wasn't to sure about this when Sunset Shimmer came out of the mansion.

"Hey Flash." Sunset said as Adagio ran past being chased by a rake wielding Sonata. "Do you have an order for a dozen pizzas and some two liters of soda for us?"

"Y.. Yeah...Umm... Was that two of the Dazzlings?" Flash asked before Sonata ran past again with a weed-eater wielding Adagio hot on her tail."

"Yes, it's kind of their home." Sunset said as she lead him into the mansion and into the kitchen. "So... Pizza delivery?"

"It's for my gas money." Flash said as she took the pizzas and put them on the counter. "So what has been going on since my family and me went on vacation to see my grandparents over the holiday?"

"How many more deliveries do you have because that is a long and very fucked up story." Sunset told him as they passed Sonata and a weed-eater-less Adagio wrestling in the grass as she helped him carry in the sodas.

"Last stop and then I have to swing past the pizza shop to drop off the money and clock out." He told her as she counted out the money.

"Swing back by afterwards and I'll fill you in about Anon-a-miss and everything else during the party." Sunset said as they passed both Adagio and Sonata coming back inside with Bulk Biceps and Berry Punch.

"Anon-a-who?" Flash asked as he opened his car door. "And why are you with the Dazzlings?"

"Just come back after you finish and I'll tell you everything." She said before going back inside.


"Sonata, I was thinking." Adagio said that morning at breakfast. "If Kijo is suddenly nice towards just Trixie it might raise some questions that might point to Aria. So instead throw out a few nice posts here and there as well as a few false trails as well."

"You mean muddy the waters a bit." Sonata said between spoonful of cereal. "Maybe I can even think of a few more things to throw anyone off our trail as well... Just give me a while and I'll come up with something."

"Take your time." Adagio said before taking a sip of her tea.


"How the hell can those two hippies already be millionaires, Flax Seed and Wheat Grass haven't even graduated and they're co-founders of F &W All Natural Cosmetics!"

"I knew it! Vapor Trail has been selling drugs to half the athletes at school, but nobody would listen when I told them I saw her giving Sky Stinger a needle of something out side of the locker room. Well whose laughing now! Whose laughing now BITCHES!!!"

"Okay, remind me never to piss off the Home Economics teacher. Turns out Ms. Peachbottom did time in juvie after stabbing her ex-boyfriend in the eye with a fork after he dumped her for a guy."

"Whoa, there's a video of Suri Polomare beating up her girlfriend, Coco Pommel, and then pushing her down the stairs. I knew there was something funny with her story when she fell down the stairs at school and broke her arm."

"Hey isn't that Bloomsforth giving Davenport a blowjob while he eats out Junebug?"

"WHAT THE HOLY FUCK!!! I remember that, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were taking a selfie in the the girls bathroom just as I was leaving. It was at the same time Anon-a-miss posted Rainbow Dash's F, but that can't be right because that's Sunset Shimmer coming out of one of the stalls behind them and she doesn't have her phone or anything in her hands. Well crap, I guess she really wasn't Anon-a-miss."


DiamondGirl: Sonata you there.

YummyTacoSiren: Yeah, what do you need DT.

DiamondGirl: I'm sending you a picture you need to see for Kijo.

YummyTacoSiren: Nice selfie.

DiamondGirl: Look behind us. This was taken at the same time Anon-a-miss posted Rainbow Dash's test with the F on it.

YummyTacoSiren: I think you just gave Sunset the best Hearth Warming gift possible... But if I post it everyone will think your Kijo.

DiamondGirl: Not if I lost my phone and Daddy got me a new one for Christmas.

YummyTacoSiren: I see Adagio has taught you well, Lonestar, and your Schwartz is as big as mine.

DiamondGirl: Huh?

YummyTacoSiren: Old Mel Brooks movie reference. If you ever watch the movie Spaceballs we were extras in the diner scene.

DiamondGirl: Mom got Dad a signed DVD of that for Christmas.

YummyTacoSiren: Well go have a little Father/Daughter bonding then and I'll see you tonight at the party.


"I knew Crystal Prep was tough, but I didn't know Sunburst had a nervous breakdown and spent a few months over the summer in a mental hospital before transferring to CHS. Maybe we should be a little nicer to him and not give him so much shit over Crystal Prep."

"Holy Shit, Tempest Shadow and Grubber use to work for that drug dealer, Storm King, before helping helping the cops take him down. There's even a video of her kicking his ass before the cops got there. Damn and I thought the video of Sonata was badass, but Tempest is really fucking hardcore."

"I don't think I will ever eat grape or any other type of jelly after watching Hugh Jelly and Noteworthy having sex in a tub full of the stuff and then feeding some of it to each other afterwards. How the hell does Kijo keep getting these videos?"

"Whoa! I didn't know Charged Up was doing drugs and that she pays for it by having sex with anyone with twenty dollars after school. Isn't she like 14 or 15."

"Is it just me or does it seem like some of these postings by Kijo have more purpose than before. It's like some of them are meant to point out who needs help like Coco, Charged Up, and Sunburst, who is nothing like we thought they were like Flax Seed, Wheat Grass, and Bulk Biceps, and how crooked the school board is."

"Yeah and who seems like their good but are actually bad like Suri and Vapor Trail and who is better than people would expect like the Flower Trio, Tempest Shadow, and Grubber."

"I think all of the sex videos and drug stuff was meant to draw us in and now Kijo is saying to Anon-a-miss that anyone can use secrets to hurt people, but it takes real skill to help them instead. It's like Kijo is actually challenging Anon-a-miss indirectly and seeing if Anon-a-miss takes the bait."


"Phff... Hahahahhahhahahahahahah!" Sonata laughed as she looked at the comments. "I didn't think about, but that's a good ideal!"

"What's a good ideal?" Adagio asked.

"Well I posted all of the new stuff an hour or so ago and someone said it was like we're challenging Anon-a-miss by showing that it isn't what secrets you post, but how you use them since a lot of this batch is meant to clean up some things around school and the school board as well as help some people." Sonata told her.

"Hmm... That is a good ideal." Adagio said. "Maybe Kijo needs to be both an avenging demon and a teacher at the same time." Then she looked at what Sonata had posted and Sonata noticed what she was looking at before jumping up and running. "YOU POSTED THAT PICTURE!!! SONATA, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU WHEN I CATCH YOU!!!!!"

Author's Notes:

The second wave has struck :pinkiehappy:

Anon-a-miss struck a week before the holiday break so I figure it isn't too much of a stretch for Flash Sentry's family to pull him out of school a week or two early to go visit family for Christmas. So only being back for a few days he has no ideal what happened while he was away. Personally I don't hate Flash, he just wasn't handled right the first time around and a few flaws would have made him better. All of MLP's best characters have flaws and they tried to shove a too perfect character into the mix, but have tried to correct it since then.

As for Chrysalis not being crooked I decided that most of the human world versions of Equestria's biggist baddies were smart enough to know that for every illegal way of getting what you wanted there was several legal, but not ethical or nice, ways to do the same thing. Grogar, Sombra, and Tirek know countless ways of taking your money that are perfectly legal and Chrysalis is not above giving her family's businesses an unfair, but legal, edge when it comes to winning contracts with the school district and any other city contracts she may have overheard about as well. In Canterlot the Changeling Corps. seems to have an unnatural ability to sniff out contracts before they are announced and usually have just the right bid for it.

Also she adores Quackers, who was a gift from her current girl friend.

Yes, the truth that Sunset isn't Anon-a-miss is out.

Next Chapter: Bonus Chapter: The Apple Family Estimated time remaining: 56 Minutes
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Anon-a-miss: The Nuclear Option

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