The Daily Show presents: Equestrian Interviews

by Daily Show Ponies

Chapter 19: Episode 8 [Twlight Sparkle]: Please welcome to the show Twlight Sparkle

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html>The Daily Show presents: Equestrian Interviews

The Daily Show presents: Equestrian Interviews

by Daily Show Ponies

First published 24th of July, 2012

Jon Stewart interviews various MLP: FiM characters at the end of an episode of 'The Daily Show'

Jon Stewart needs to find a way to get more people to watch his show. To do this he welcomes a new series of guests from a far off land containing monsters, magic, and most importantly... ponies!
Join him on an adventure that has him matching wits with sentient mythical creatures ranging from god-like ponies to a fire breathing dragon! Each "Episode" marks a different MLP character getting a chance to travel to the human world for an interview on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.

Please feel free to leave a suggestion for who Jon should interview next.
Disclaimer: For proper context it is highly recommended to reach each chapter in order as many interviews allude to past guests and events.
A special thanks to Zeta040, Cantankerous, and Zervziel for proofreading several stories listed below.

List of Characters who have already appeared:
- Chapter 1: Spike
- Chapter 2: Derpy
- Chapter 3: Applejack
- Chapter 4: Ms. Cheerilee
- Chapter 5: Octavia
- Chapter 6: Zecora
- Chapter 7: Mayor Mare
- Chapter 8: Twilight
- Chapter 9: Trixie
- Chapter 10: DJ Pon3
- Chapter 11: Rainbow Dash
- Chapter 12: Iron Will
- Chapter 13: Fancy Pants
- Chapter 14: Queen Chrysalis
- Chapter 15: Luna
- Chapter 16: A Changeling
- Chapter 17: Rarity
- Chapter 18: Lyra and Bon Bon
- Chapter 19: The Cutie Mark Crusaders
- Chapter 20: Discord
- Chapter 21: Fluttershy

Intro: The letter

It had been a long month and the week-long break didn't help much. All in all, Jon Stewart felt like he was at his wits end. Recently officials from Comedy Central studio informed Jon that his show wasn't doing so well in the ratings. In truth, it wasn't doing that bad, just not as well as they had projected, which meant that it was up to Jon to think of some new ways to attract more viewers.

There were some ideas thrown around the studio in the past couple weeks, but nothing excited the hard-to-please executives calling the shots from behind the scenes. Although it was never openly discussed, Jon feared that his show might be cancelled unless some changes were done and fast. The studio had given him a week long break, as they usually do every now and again, but this time they expected him to use this mini-vacation to come up with some new ideas.

It was now Sunday night, he was scheduled to go on the air again the next morning, and he had... nothing.

As Jon entered the study of his house, he wondered what he was going to tell his bosses tomorrow morning or, for that matter, what he would tell his faithful cast and crew if his worse case scenario came true. As he pondered this, Jon noticed something sitting on his desk that hadn't previously been there. At first glance, it looked to be one of his discarded notes of ideas, but as he got closer, he realized it was actually some kind of rolled up, sealed letter.

This confused Jon as he had never seen it before nor should he have any new mail on a Sunday. But what confused him even more was the fact that it didn't look like an average letter. It wasn't a properly sealed envelope with a U.S. stamp, but instead it seemed to be a rolled up parchment wrapped with some kind of official seal holding it all together.

Jon broke the seal and opened his newly acquired mystery letter which was comprised of six pages. The first page was a letter addressed to Jon himself and the other five pages were lists of what seemed to be names.

Putting on his reading glasses, Jon wondered where it came from and how it got on his desk, thinking that it might be a clever game invented by his son to cheer daddy up. As Jon took the first page and began to read it he was certain that, yes, this had to be the case. Based on the contents of the letter, it had to have been dreamt up by a child.

Jon placed the list of names on his desk and turned his attention again to the letter which read:

"What the hell kind of prank is this?" Jon thought to himself as he read over the letter again.

The more he thought about it, the more he concluded this couldn't have been his son's doing. The handwriting, though nothing to be impressed by, was far too neat to be his son's. Also, the way the note was worded was much too elegant to have been written by a child, almost as if it really was from someone of royalty.

Jon, at this point fully ready to go to sleep, reached for the list of many names, glancing over them while occasionally stopping to read one or two.

Berry Punch, Bon-Bon, Octavia, Shining Armor, Trixie, Zecora, Gilda...

The list went on and on and began to resemble less like a list of names and more like a list of failed candy names.

Some names, however, were in bold and were located at the very top of the list which, Jon could only guess, meant they were important people. These bolded names included such colorful sounding folks like: Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, even the name of the so called "Princess" herself.

Jon sat in his chair and laughed at the thought of a Princess sending him royal mail and offering her assistance. Jon had to admit that the letter did look very official. Though, at the same time, if an official-esque letter from "Royalty" is all it took to convince Jon of its validity, then he would have lost all his money to a Nigerian Prince a long time ago.

As strange as this all was, Jon was no stranger to powerful people trying to get in contact with him. In the past, he had received phone calls from foreign leaders, ambassadors, and former U.S. Presidents. Usually because they wished to set up some kind of appearance on his show or to invite him to a social gathering, but this just seemed absurd.

Still...Jon had to agree that an interview with someone who has connections to royalty would definitely be just the angle he needed to impress those back at work. Jon quickly dismissed the idea.

"NO! That's stupid!" he thought, shaking his head, "This is obviously a fake. I mean, there's no place on Earth called 'Equestria' and I'm pretty sure the ruler of an entire nation has better things to do than to pull her resources to help a single New Yorker down on his luck."

Having said that, Jon was once again reminded of his current predicament and glanced over at his clock which told him that it was 11:34pm. It was almost Monday.

Next to his clock was Jon's study phone which he rarely used. It was a simple, black phone, nothing special, but as he looked at it his mind began to wander. He thought about his show. He thought about his friends and family who relied on him. And he thought about his millions of fans.

To this day, he is unsure as to what exactly made him pick up that phone. Maybe it was his lack of sleep, or sheer curiosity, or maybe he was just desperate. Either way, he picked up his phone and, with a deep sigh, dialed the obviously fake number to see what would happen. To his surprise, after a few seconds of ringing, someone actually picked up.

"Hello?" A soothing voice said, clearly from the other line.

"Um...hi?" Jon said, who was all but certain no one would answer, "Princess...Celestia?"

"Ah! Mr. Stewart, I'm so glad you decided to call me," The voice said, "Yes, this is Princess Celestia. So, have you decided on which of my loyal subjects you wish to interview?"

Jon found himself at a lost for words. Whoever this person was, she was very committed to the act.

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I don't quite understand what you're trying to do here." He said, trying to sound as authoritative as possible.

"Whatever do you mean?" The voice asked.

"What I mean 'your majesty,' is I'm not sure what your motive here is," Jon answered, rubbing his tired eyes, "What do you want? Money? Because I don't have much. Also, how did you get this letter in my house? Do I need to alert the authorities?"

"Mr. Stewart," The voice said, with a hint of seriousness, "I assure you, this is not some kind of trick nor are you in any danger. Like I detailed in my letter, I only wish to help you."

Jon now felt annoyed as he thought the mere mention of the police would cause his prankster to hang up. Before Jon could say another word, the voice spoke again.

"I understand this must all be very suspicious to you," The voice added, "But believe me when I say I only have your best interests in mind." Jon sat back down in his chair, rubbing his hand over his face.

"Well you'll forgive me if I don't just take your word for it," Jon said, his voice now thick with exhaustion, "But I tend not to believe every nutcase who sends me letters claiming to be the ruler of a foreign land that doesn't exist."

Jon could hear the person on the other end now giggle softly as she once again spoke in her calming voice.

"I suppose I'll just have to show you then," The voice said, "Show you that I am serious about who I am and what I'm willing to do."

This sounded less like reassurance to Jon and more like a threat, but he'd be lying if he said he wasn't curious as to where the caller was going with this.

"Do me a favor Mr. Stewart," The voice added, "Please close your eyes and make sure you are standing straight up."

"Sure thing," Jon grunted, as he leaned back in his seat defiantly. Holding the note and list in front of him, "And while I'm at it why don't I-"

Before Jon could finish his statement, a bright light flashed all around him, blinding him. The sensation of this sudden burst of light was soon replaced with the crashing feeling of falling onto cold, hard ground. The slow regaining of his sight coupled with his aching lower back and head made it feel as if he had just woken up from a knockout punch.

"You didn't stand up like I asked." A familiar voice said piercing the silence.

As Jon's vision slowly returned, he stumbled to his feet and noticed that he was no longer in his study, but in some kind of giant chamber which could easily have housed his study 20 times over. The room was decorated in the finest tapestries and stained glass, each of many colors and designs, with the occasional artifact on display.

In his lifetime, as a famous political comedian, Jon had been invited to many extravagant locations and settings. None of which even came close to this.

Jon also noticed, via the many giant windows, that it was dark outside but the inside of the room was brightly lit with many torches attached to the columns. Columns which lead in rows of two to an exit on one side and, to the other, a deluxe chair which could only be described as a throne.

Sitting on that throne, much to Jon's shock, was what appeared to be a large animal (a horse perhaps) complete with wings on its back, a horn on its head, and a crown to go with it. Its body was pale white and it had free flowing hair of many colors.

Before Jon could make head or tails at what he was looking at (which was also looking at him) the most amazing thing yet happened. This multi-colored creature of many features... spoke.

"I do hope you're alright," The animal said with a gentle smile, "We wouldn't want your first trip to our world to be a foul one now would we?"

Jon recognized the creature's voice.

"Y-y-you're Princess...Celestia! Aren't you!?" Jon said, now fully standing up, his eyes wide with astonishment.

"Yes I am. Welcome to my palace." Celestia said, giving a reassuring smile, "You can come closer Mr. Stewart. I promise I won't bite."

Jon felt weak in the legs. Everything inside him was telling him that this was all fake. An illusion. Some kind of dream. But the pain of his back and the cold feel of the marble floor under his feet told him that this was very much real. Just then, Jon realized that something the Princess had said was very important.

"Wait a minute," Jon Said, "Where am I!?"

The Princess smiled.

"Why, you are in my Kingdom," She replied, extending a wing over to a nearby window, "Take a look for yourself." Jon was momentarily startled by the creature's massive wingspan.

He hesitated to follow the creature's orders, but curiosity once again got the better of him and he slowly made his way towards the window, walking cautiously as if he were navigating across hot coal. He held the back of his head and kept an ever watchful eye over the talking animal.

Even though it was dark, Jon could see an outside world much different than his own. Instead of concrete sidewalks he saw dirt roads. Instead of tall buildings piercing the clouds, he saw small towns and villages. And instead of humans he saw more animals.

"Welcome to Equestria," Celestia said, now behind him, "So, have you decided?"

"Uh...decided on what?" he asked, momentarily surprised by the elegant creature now being closer than before.

"On who you wish to interview first," she replied, motioning to the papers in his hand, "If you need any information regarding anypony on the list, I'd be glad to assist."

Jon didn't respond right away. Instead he just stared at the Princess then back out of the window. He could hardly believe it. It was all true. Talking animals, another nation in another world, and this royal Princess. All of it was true. Jon then thought about what this meant for him and turned to face the Princess who still had her eyes focused on him.

"Sooo anyone on this list," Jon said holding up the papers, "You'll let me have them on my show?"

"That is correct Mr. Stewart," Celestia replied, "Just give me a name and I'll make sure they're teleported to your studio at your behest." Jon looked at her with confusion as he followed her back to her throne.

"Don't you mean 'Transported'", Jon said, hoping to God that he was wrong.

With a slight giggle Celestia replied.

"Like I said Mr Stewart, just pick any name and I'll handle the rest." she said. Jon looked at the list of names and back at Celestia.

"Not to look a gift horse in the mouth," he said, regretting his choice of words, "But why are you doing all this for me?"

Celestia smiled and extended her hoof.

"Let's just say you have fans all over the world and parts beyond," she said, "So? Do we have a deal?" Jon stared at her outstretched front leg for a moment, then made his decision.

"Yeah," Jon said, firmly grabbing her hoof, "We have a deal... also, call me 'Jon.'" Celestia smiled and in excitement momentarily extended both her wings.

"Excellent! So have you decided on who you want on your show first?" She asked.

Jon took a moment to think about who he wanted to pick. He had very little to go on and decided to ask an obvious first question.

"Is everyone on this...list like you?" he asked. Celestia looked at the window she previously had Jon examine and responded.

"If you mean are they of royal descent, then you should know some of them are, yes," she said, now looking at Jon once again, "If you mean are they all talking animals...then the answer is, absolutely." Celestia smiled and winked.

Jon looked back at the list and was a second away from asking the Princess to give him some background information on some of the many names. But just then, something caught his eye, it was actually something he noticed when he first read the note. It was a name. A name that wasn't on the list, but a name that by all accounts seemed very promising. Jon had made up his mind.

"Actually, I have princess," he said, much to the delight of Celestia, "But this person isn't on the list you provided me." Celestia's expression changed from that of exuberance to confusion.

"Oh really?" Celestia said, now very intrigued, "Whose name is it?" Jon then presented to Celestia the very note that she herself gave him and pointed to a little clause at the end written in small print.

It read:

"Royal mail written, dictated, and delivered by 'Spike the Dragon.'"

Later that night in Jon's study

"Hello!? Yes, get me Mr. Steven Bodow!" Jon said to the secretary on the other end of the line, his voice filled with excitement, "Hello Stevie? Yeah, it's me Jon! Listen, you're never going to believe who I got for tomorrow's show!

Episode 1 [Spike]: Please welcome to the show Spike the Dragon!

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Spike the Dragon (Spike)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

The sound of applause and cheering echoed through the busy set as the 'Daily Show logo' flew towards the viewer and went off screen. The camera began its descent to the center of the stage and eventually stops to reveal the host of the show, Jon Stewart, organizing his notes has he looks to the camera about to speak.

“Welcome back!" Jon said, trying his best to talk over the audience, "My guest tonight, he’s a resident of Ponyville and the personal assistant to Twilight Sparkle, please welcome to the show, Spike the Dragon. Spike!”

The audience applauded once again as a small purple dragon, with very noticeable green scales protruding up and down his head and back, emerges from backstage. He waved and smiled at the audience (Even blowing an occasional kiss) as he made his way to the center stage to greet Jon.

The two shook each other’s hand and Jon motioned for Spike to sit down only to see his guest awkwardly use the chair as a boost to get on top of the table (As even standing on the chair would have made it difficult for the cameras to see him.) Jon was half way through an attempt to help him up, but by then Spike already found his way atop the table, sitting comfortably in front of his ‘The Daily Show’ mug.

As the audience’s cheers and applause started to die down, Jon sat in his chair and faced Spike, ready to go.

“Welcome to the show Spike, it’s good to have you here," Jon said, "And may I say this…you’re a lot shorter than I expected.”

The audience chuckled at the opening joke causing Spike to do the same as he reached for his mug, but he did not drink from it. He wanted to retort, but his nervousness got the better of him as the host continued his jesting.

"When I was told I'd be interviewing a dragon, I just assumed..." Jon said, leaving his statement open in an attempt to let Spike say something.

Spike seemed to have picked up on this and responded quickly. Almost quickly enough that it looked like he interrupted the legendary comedian.

“Yeah, I uh- I get that a lot," Spike replied, "Oh! It’s great to be here Jon!”

Jon smiled at his guest's first official statement. He also noted that, based on his voice, he was probably quite young.

“Now before we get started, I just want to say that you, young man...," Jon said, while comically wagging his finger, "...you've caused quite a bit of a uh…hubbub, if you will, backstage.”

“Eh heh, yeah I guess you could say that." Spike said, while rubbing the back of his head, "I think your backstage manager hates me.”

“Okay, explain to me…w-what happened," Jon asked, "Because I’ve been up here all day and…just-" Spike's expression turned to that of guilt as he interrupted Jon with what happened.

“Well…I was in the back getting ready to go on stage and…well first let me start by saying, I’m staaarving!" Spike exclaimed, holding his stomach, "I was so nervous about coming on your show, I didn’t eat anything before arriving so-”

“But we gave you a gift basket of food in the uh…" Jon paused, snapping his fingers, "Dressing room. That was for you, man.”

“Oh I know, but the thing is…I didn’t recognize over half the stuff in there and I didn’t want to risk getting sick before going on stage.” Spike said, trying his best to sound responsible.

“So what- what happened then? What did you end up doing?" Jon replied anxiously, now more interested in what Spike had to say.

“Well", Spike said, nervously, "What happened was, your backstage manager, Ms. uh-”

“Ms. Jenson.” Jon interjected, doing his best to help the obviously nervous dragon along.

“Yes. Ms. Jenson came up to me to see what was wrong…and well," Spike said, trying to get the story right in his head, "She leaned over me and said, uh...she said: ‘Is there anything else I can get for you?’ And I noticed that she was wearing a necklace with a huge diamond on the end of it and-”

Once again Jon interrupted Spike. He was trying to go easy on his guest but his comedic sense of opportunity overpowered him.

“Really? That’s what you notice first?” Jon said raising an eyebrow. “A pretty woman leans over and all you can think is: ‘Mmmm mmmm! Look at dem diamonds!’”

The Audience laughed at Jon’s innuendo, which seemed to be somewhat lost on Spike.

"Please continue." He added.

“We-well you see, I’m not proud of what I did next," Spike said, "But when she leaned over, I uh…I took a bite of her necklace.”

The thought of a small dragon hanging onto one of his employee's jewelry caused Jon to chuckle.

“Really!?", Jon said, gleefully, "So that’s why she hates you?”

“Well no, not exactly," Spike replied, "You see…I apologized for what I did and she forgave me, buuut she didn’t appreciate what I said next.”

“Why?", Jon asked, "What did you say?” Spike tensed up as he continued his story.

“Well I apologized to her," Spike said, "And I said- uh I said: “I’m so sorry! Oh and by the way, no offense, but uh…that’s a total fake.’”

Unprepared by what Spike had said, Jon began to burst out in laughter as he swiveled in his chair trying his best to keep his composure, but to no avail. The audience laughed along with him while Spike took this momentary break in the interview to sip his mug of water for the first time, which he had to hold with both hands.

Spike, now hydrated, decided to take this opportunity to explain his actions as he was certain Jon had no idea of the intricacies of an Equestrian dragon.

"Yeah you see I-I sort of eat diamonds, as well as other kinds of gems.” Spike yelled, making sure Jon could hear him.

Catching his breath, Jon swiveled back to his previous spot just in time to retort on what Spike had just said, though still slightly laughing as he did.

“Why didn’t you just tell us? I mean we--" Jon paused, his laughing now coming to a stop. "There’s a ‘Jared’ down the street we could've picked you up something to go!”

At the time, Spike didn't know who or what “Jared” was, or if Jon was being serious, but nevertheless he played along and answered honestly.

“Well it’s my first time on the show," Spike replied, "Aaaand I…didn’t want to make a big fuss out of it.”

Jon laughed again (Though much less than before) at the thought and quickly changed his voice to that his trademark "condescending New Yorker".

“’Oh I see…so you won’t tell us what you can or cannot eat, but you’ll gladly eat our fucking jewelry." Jon said, with a higher than normal exaggeration. "Yeah...yeah, I see how it is!’”

Spike, at a loss for words, took another sip of his mug trying his best not to laugh at the host's comical voice.

Having gotten this far, Jon wanted to see what else he could get away with and decided to toy with his guest a little bit more.

“Well Spike it was nice having you on the show!” Jon announced, as he stood up and extended an arm towards the backstage only to quickly motion for Spike to sit back down less he actually believed the interview was over.

“But no really we’re glad to have you here today.” Jon added, sounding as sincere as possible.

“Heh,heh. Thanks Jon." Spike said, "glad to be here."

Spike prepared himself for another joke at his expense, ready to hold his ground, which is why he was all the more relieved to receive a soft question.

"So where are you from Spike?" Jon asked. Spike took a deep breath (Which given his small size very few noticed) and answered the question, now sounding more confident and relaxed.

"Well I was born in Canterlot, but I now live in Ponyville,'" Spike answered, turning to the audience with a sudden realization, "Oh uh...these are places in 'Equestria' my home country."

"Oh wait, just give me a second," Jon said, as he started to write in his notes, "'Ponyville'...'Canterlot'...'Equestria'...OK! got it!"

"Heh, yeah, I don't think you'll be able to find Equestria on your map." Spike said, turning to the image of the world map in the background.

"Most Americans can't even find Iraq on our map." Jon said. The Audience laughed with one attendee yelling out "Woo!" at one point.

“Uh, now like you said before, this is your first time here on the show, but," Jon said, pausing to make sure he had his facts straight, "You yourself are no stranger to being interviewed; am I correct?”

"That’s true, I have been interviewed before." Spike answered, sounding excited, "There was once a profile piece done on yours truly by a local Ponyville School newspaper.”

“Oh whoa that must have been exciting." Jon said, "So did the paper belong to some king of pony University or pony Community College?” Spike slightly tensed up.

“Weeell not exactly. The paper is called ‘The Free Foal Press,’ its run by the local grade school ponies.” Spike said. If Jon wasn't surprised that ponies had their own newspaper, he certainly was now that he learned little kids could have one.

“….Oh… I see. No, no, that’s great!" Jon said, trying salvage this line of questioning, "A couple of, uh, cute kids asking questions for their little paper, it’s adorable. Sure was nice of them to go to you.”

“Yeah it would have been," Spike said, with a guilty smile, "Had they actually ran the story.”

Jon felt a sensation of both pity and amusement as he leaned forward over his desk holding an outstretched hand to keep his balance and another over his face as he laughed. This sight caused Spike to do the same out of embarrassment.

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" Jon said, holding nothing back, "These kids get to interview a dragon and they don’t publish it!? I mean who- what other story did they have that could-”

Before he could finish Jon stopped and placed his clenched fist in front of his face, (As if to hold a microphone) and placed two fingers against his ear.

“’This just in," Jon said, trying his best to mimic the voice of a news reporter, "An outbreak of cooties on the playground leaves dozens infected and a recent poll shows that apple juice may increase in price by 12%'”

“Trust me I felt the same way!" Spike said, laughing at the thought of his friends back home watching him squirm on Television.

After a moment of laughter, between both themselves and the audience, the two once again engaged in their interview with Jon now more focused.

“So Spike…Oh and don’t worry we'll run this interview…So Spike, for those at home who don’t know who you are, could you explain just what exactly…it is you do?” Jon asked.

“Oh, well I don't like to brag," Spike said, untruthfully, "BUT for those who don’t know I’m the assistant to Twilight Sparkle back home in Ponyville.” Jon didn't know much about who Twilight Sparkle was, but he did know she was a very important figure.

“Twilight Sparkle being a local hero around your neck of the woods, am I correct?” Jon asked.

“Well yeah," Spike said, She-”.

“And not some kind of god-awful book series.” John added.

“No, no she’s- although if anyone would be a book it'd be her. But I guess you can say she’s a royal adviser to the princess." Spike said, trying again not to laugh, "She is something of hero back home. And it’s my job to assist her with her duties to our Princess. Princess Celestia.”

“So she’s your boss?” Jon asked.

“Well I guess, but I like to think we’re more of a family.” Spike replied, taking a sip of his water.

"Now what exactly has she done to earn her the title of 'hero'", Jon asked.

"Well its hard to explain," Spike said stroking his chin, "But put it this way: Whenever Ponyville, or any other place in Equestria, is in trouble, she's always there to set things right!"

“Hmm I see, how admirable. I'll have to ask her myself if I ever get the chance." Jon said, making a mental note.

Now…what kind of an assistant are you?" Jon continuted, "Do you: Get her coffee, take her phone calls, shine her horse shoes or-"

“No, no, no, nothing like that." Spike said, sounding somewhat defensive. "My main job is sending letters from Ponyville aaall the way to the princess at the request of Twilight, or sometimes her friends.” Jon recalled the letter he received the night before and took this opportunity to shed some light on how exactly it came into his possession.

“How do you do that exactly?" John asked, "Because I noticed, if you don’t mind me saying, you don’t have any wings, so how do you transport these letters from so far away?”

“Well you see…" Spike said, pausing to look around him, "…OH! I’ll give you an example, can I see that for a second?”

Spike reached for a piece of paper that Jon had previously used during other segments of the show that day. Jon obliged and handed him his notes, watching as Spike rolled them up and, with a quick breath, engulfed them in a flame of emerald green. In a few seconds, the notes had suddenly vanished. Not burned up in a cloud of ash, but simply vanished. This spectacle, much to the amusement of the audience, caused Jon to stare into open space where his notes had just disappeared.

“And just like that, your papers are in the hoofs of the princess herself, right now as we speak; instant royal mail!” Spike said, with a snap of his finger. While he sat there with a proud grin on his face, Jon continued to stare upwards eventually pointing in that direction.

"’I’ll be honest..." He said, looking somewhat worried, "...I really wish you hadn’t done that.” This time, Spike was the one who lost composure as he nearly fell over backwards laughing.

“You have noooo idea the kinds of things I write down on tho- I mean we-, "Jon said, in a slight panic, "We just had a segment about sex robots and now the princess is going to be reading it!?”

With Spike still laughing at himself for not thinking his plan all the way through, Jon seized the moment and put his hands in front him, in dainty manner, while doing his best to immediate the voice of Queen Elizabeth II.

“’Oh hellooooo, what do we have here?," Jon said, "Oooooo a letter from dear Spike, I wonder what it could- GOOD HEAVENS!’” Spike couldn't stop laughing.

“Don’t- don’t worry, the Princess is a very understanding pony." Spike said, trying his hardest to stop laughing, "I’m pretty sure I won’t get in trouble when I- when I go back home.” Jon waited for Spike to catch his breath before continuing.

“So when do you head back home?” Jon asked.

“Probably after the show," Spike answered, now more calm, "I don’t like to be too far away from my friends in Ponyville.”

“So about this ‘Ponyville.'" John intrigued, while making air quotes, "Am I to assume it’s filled with...ponies?” Spike raised his eyebrow at the obvious question and decided to give an obvious answer.

“"Uuh, for the most part yes, Jon.” Spike answered, unsure where he was going with this.

“Now having said that do you ever find yourself just…looking at your hands, maybe wiggle your fingers a little and think to yourself..." John pausing for emphasis, “Wow…I have such a genetic advantage over these people.’”

“Well no," Spike replied with a slight giggle, "But actually that’s one of the reasons why I’m in charge of writing those royal letters.”

“Oh really?” Jon said.

“Yes sir! Having fingers really makes it easy to take a letter every now and again.” Spike said, once again sounding proud of himself.

“Do you ever just rub that into someone’s face?” Jon said, as he leaned forward.

Spike laughed at the question and tried to answer but was too late as Jon continued.

“Do you ever just- like when you see someone walking down the street, give em one of these?” Jon asked, as he turned his chair to his audience giving them two very big “thumbs up” while putting on a toothy grin.

“Oh no, no, no" Spike said, waving his hands back and forth, "The residents of Ponyville have their own methods of doing things without the need for hands.”

“So none of them ever get jealous?” Jon asked.

“Hmmm not as often as you might thin- well there is this one pony," Spike answered, "Lyra. I think she might be.”

“How uh- how can you tell?” Jon asked, recognizing the name from the list.

“Well every now and again I catch her staring at me.” Spike answered. Having heard this, Jon puffed out his chest, adjusted his suit, and once again changed his voice. This time to that of a deep rough voice which could at best be described as "trying to sound manly."

“Well it sounds to me like this 'Lyra' has a thing for Ol’ Spike the Dragon.” Jon said. He was certain this would cause his guest to laugh again, but all it did was make the young dragon grin as if he knew something Jon did not.

“Oooh trust me, it’s not like that," Spike said, "She’s already spoken for.”

“Oh I see.” Jon said

“Plus I..." Spike said, rubbing the back of his head, "...I already have a thing for somepony else.”

Jon's eyebrows shot up as his keen sense of observation, which made him a master comic and host, alerted him of a possible new talking point. He leaned forward, now more interested; momentarily distracted by the audience's collective "D’aaaaw.”

“Reeaally?" Jon said, Who is she? What’s she like?”

“Well...she’s real pretty" Spike said, slightly blushing, "And she has the most amazing mane!” Jon could sense how nervous this made spike. But he could also sense the comedic potential in this line of questioning.

"Gooo ooon!” Jon said, placing both his hands under his chin as if to hold his head up.

“Well, she’s the most generous pony I’ve ever met!" Spike continuted, "But...I don’t think she likes me.”

“Why is that?” Jon asked?

“Well,” Spike said, "The thing is--"

“Did you try eating her necklace?” Jon asked, very straight faced.

“No, no, I would never do that!" Spike exclaimed, with a laugh, "It’s just- well I mean I know she likes me but I’m pretty sure she doesn’t like that in that way.” Upon hearing this revelation Jon decided to give the little guy a break and back off the subject somewhat.

“Aaah," Jon said, nodding his head. "We’ve all been there.”

“Yeah, she spends most of her time working on her fashi- I mean…working." Spike said, in a panic, "She’s very good at what she does and she has such passion, which is also why I like her so much.”

“So she’s an active career woman?” Jon asked, disappointed he didn't get a name drop to see if he recognized it from the list.

“Something like that, yes.” Spike answered.

“Now- now, would you say your career, aside from being an assistant, is delivering all these letters around ponyville?” Jon asked in an attempt to get Spike to talk more about himself.

“Ye- Well no, actually, I don’t deliver letters for everypony in town." Spike answered, "I only deliver royal mail for Twilight, her friends, and the Princess.”

“Oh I see, sorry.” Jon said, scratching his head.

“Yeah we already have somepony whose job it is to deliver mail around Ponyville." Spike added, "Her name is Derpy, she’s our mailmare. Actually she’s a pretty big fan of yours.”

“Oh really!” Jon said, interested at the thought of a fan who was literally 'out of this world.'

“Yeah. You and your friend...uh, Colbert." Spike continued, "She watches your guys' shows every day.” Jon was pleased to hear this. He cleared his throat.

"Oh, well this Derpy person seems to have really good taste.” Jon said, adjusting his tie.

“Yeah she records both shows every day and watches them when she gets back home." Spike said, with a slight giggle, "She can never decide which one to watch first so she sets each show to a different TV and watches ‘The Daily Show’ with one eye and the ‘Colbert Report’ with the other.” This made Jon very confused.

“We- well" Jon said, at a lost for words, "Well you tell Derpy that she’s welcome on the show anytime. We’d love to have her.”

“Sure!" Spike said, enthusiastically. "No problem!” Just then a voice came from behind the stage. It was soft enough so the audience wouldn't hear it but loud enough for Jon to. It was the voice a staff member telling Jon time was running out.

“Also, I’m being told we’re running out of time and we need to go to commercial," Jon said, looking at the audience and back to Spike, "But listen, can you stick around for a few more minutes and we’ll throw the rest up on the web?”

“Sure, I’d love to!” Spike answered.

“OK, thanks a lot for being here I really appreciate it." Jon said, as he grabbed Spike's hand. "Spike the Dragon everyone! We’ll be right back.”

The crowd erupted in applause as the camera paned away from Jon shaking Spike’s hand and whispering something in his ear. The show's logo once again flew on screen and the program transitioned into it's final commercial.

Episode 2 [Derpy]: The book

With a heavy sigh Jon threw himself on his living room sofa, tossing his phone on the table in the process. His head was still spinning from the past 24 hours. It would be awhile before the final numbers came in but for the time being what he did know was his show was the most viewed program that day. "Comedic gold," "interview of the millennium," "best thing to happen to television." These were just some of the acclaims many professional reviewers were saying about the episode.

Jon had just finished taking the last of his phone calls. After his interview with Spike he was bombarded by calls and emails from newspapers, websites, and other TV shows begging for a quote or preview of what was to come next (To which even Jon didn't know). Shortly after, and even during, the interview fans were buzzing on Twitter, Facebook, and social forums about what they had witnessed. It had gotten so popular that when Jon (As a social experiment) typed his name in Google the first few suggestions were:

"Did you mean: Jon Stewart interviews Dragon?"

"Did you mean: Jon Stewart interviews Spike?"

"Did you mean: Jon Stewart Equestria?"

"Did you mean: Jon Stewart and the talking dragon?"

Reporters and fans aside, Jon was also getting the occasional call from family members and colleagues congratulating him on his impressive feat. Something that even he still had a hard time believing.

"A Dragon." Jon thought, laughing out loud. "I interviewed a God damned, dragon!"

Putting his feet on the table Jon placed both his hands over his face hiding his ever growing smile. He wondered if all of this was just some very realistic dream that, at any moment, he would wake up from with nothing to show for it.

To test this theory he leaned forward and grabbed the list he acquired from Princess Celestia. The list which contained the names of the many residents of Ponyville. He felt the papyrus in his hands, he saw the wrinkles in the pages, he could smell the distinct odor emanating from it, he heard it make noises every time he furled and unfurled it's pages, and he could taste the future possibilities.

Yep, this was very real and what Jon didn't know was it had only just begun.

As he continued to be lost in his own thoughts he realized that he hadn't spoken with Celestia since last night. He aimed to resolve this so he reached again for his phone, which was almost out of power. Before he could dial he noticed a fairly new text message that was unread. He must not have noticed it as not even a wild elephant couldn't break him away from his current daze. It was from none other than his good friend Stephen Colbert who (As a fellow host knew the importance of getting ready the night before) had simply said: "Saw the show. You were great!"

This made Jon smile as he made a quick, but heartfelt, response and continued to dial the number of the far way princess. Jon still needed to look at the princess' letter for reference as he hadn't saved her number in his contacts yet. Though in time he would be able to recite the number by heart.

After a few seconds of ringing, much like before, the same gentle voice once again greeted him.

"Hello Mr. Stewart," Celestia said from the other end of the line. "Its good to hear from you again."

"Likewise, your majesty.'" Jon said. "Also, like I said before please...call me 'Jon.'"

"Oh, my apologies," She said, sounding amused. "Very well but only if you call me 'Celestia.'" Jon felt somewhat awkward at the idea of addressing royalty with such a lack of formality but decided very quickly to just go along with it.

"Not a problem...Celestia." He said

"So what do I owe the pleasure of your calling me so soon?" She wondered.

"Well for starters I just wanted to thank you for loaning your dragon to me," Jon said, facetiously.

"Not a problem," Celestia said, with a giggle. "Spike had a wonderful time in New York, I do hope he wasn't too much of a handful."

"No not at all." He said. "As a matter a fact thanks to him our program saw a huge increase in viewership. He really made a big impact on the show. I guess you can say because of him our popularity really 'Spiked.'" As the words left his lips Jon felt utterly ashamed at such a transparently horrible joke. The princess however found it quite humorous.

"I'm so glad to hear!" She replied with a hearty laugh.

"Uh yeah, we haven't seen numbers this high since I got to interview Obama a few years back." Jon continued. "And even those pale in comparison to this."

"Hmm?" Celestia said. "I'm sorry, who is 'Obama.'" For a brief moment Jon was taken aback only realize that her question was a perfectly reasonable all things considered.

"Oh sorry that's right you're not from around here," Jon deduced. "Uh, I guess you can say he's the...'Princess Celestia' of our world."

"How fascinating!" She replied, sounding as genuine as always.

"Yeah, yeah, except instead of wings and a horn our guy has death drones and a seemingly endless supply of soldiers." He added, with a slight grin.

"Oh...I see." Celestia said, clearing her throat. "Now then I believe you had another reason for calling me." Jon was tempted to tease her some more but time was of the essence. It was time to get down to business.

"Yes actually, I wanted to talk to you about who I wanted to appear on my show for tomorrow." Jon said, holding the list of names in front of his face.

"Oh my," Celestia said. "So soon?"

"Well as I'm sure you know I do a show every day except for weekends," he explained. "And the fans really took a liking to my interview with Spike. So much so that they want more Equestrian interviews. I want to see if we can't make lightning strike twice."

"I see." Celestia said, impressed by Jon's tenacity. "Well Mr. St- Jon, I am very pleased to hear this and am more than happy to further assist you. So, have you decided on who you wish to interview next."

Ever since the overwhelming popularity of his last interview Jon had been wrestling with the same question over and over again in his mind: How am I going to top it? An interview with real life dragon wasn't going to be easy to beat. His next choice could go either way depending on how he handled it. Jon had an idea of who he wanted to interview next but to go any further he needed some background information first.

Celestia's voice, checking to see if Jon was still on the line, woke him up from his deep thought and he begun to speak again, picking his words carefully.

"Well I do have an idea but before I make my decision I want to ask you something, but you have to promise me you get offended" Jon said cautiously. This really got Celestia's attention.

"I shall do my best." Celestia said, truthfully.

"Well I've been thinking," Jon said, debating in his head if he should continue. "Do you guys in Equestria...have books?" To his relief his question wasn't met with hostility or malice but instead by a fit of laughter.

"Why Jon, of course we do!" She answered. "What a silly thing to ask." Jon wanted to respond by asking how then do people in Equestria hold them in their fingerless hooves but decided not to press his luck.

"Sorry," Jon said now embarrassed. "I'm still getting used to this alternate world of multi-colored talking animals thing."

"That's quite alright," Celestia said with a chuckle. "Why the sudden interest in pony literature?"

"Well as you may or may not know, whenever I get the chance, I like to interview people who've just published a book." Jon answered, informatively. "It's actually one of my favorite kinds of interviews because on the one hand the person I'm interviewing gets time on the air to promote their book, and on the other hand I get to make fun of them for writing such a terrible book. It's a win win. So, I was I was wondering if anyone on the list is a published author."

"I see...how efficient. Give me a moment to think about this," Celestia said, tapping her hoof against the floor in thought. "While I do know some ponies whose special talent is writing I'm afraid none of them are present on the list I provided." For a very brief moment Jon found it odd that she used the phrase 'special talent' but quickly dismissed it as mere colorful euphemisms.

"Well writing books doesn't have to their career." Jon added, not ready to give up on his plan. "It could just be some average Joe who wrote a book just for the heck of it. Those are usually the funniest ones."

"Yes well still I don't thin- Oh!" Celestia said, with a sudden realization. "Actually there is somepony on the list who wrote her own book not too long ago."

"Oh that's great!" Jon replied, now literally on the edge of his seat. "Who is she."

"Actually this is quite the coincidence," Celestia continued, amused by the circumstances at hand. "Because as I recall you've technically already invited her on your show."

"I have?" Jon wondered aloud.

"Indeed you have, Jon." she replied. "Does the name 'Derpy' ring a bell?"

Episode 2 [Derpy]: Please welcome to the show Derpy Hooves

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Derpy Hooves (Derpy)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

With the success of his last interview the 'Daily show's' audience attendance had filled up in record time! Producers were even thinking of expanding the set to fit more guests. As the show returned from another commercial break the audience began to cheer and holler with excitement for they knew what was next. The interview segment.

"Welcome back to the program, we have a very special guest tonight!" Jon said, briefly pausing to let the audience's cheers die down. "She's the premiere mailmare for Ponyville and other parts of Equestria, her new book is called '50 shades of muffins: How a simple food product can change your life.' Ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the show, Derpy!"

Both the audience and Jon stood up to applaud their guest who slowly made her way onto the stage. She was a grey colored Pegasus with light blonde hair and her cutie mark (Something that Jon has yet to learn about) depicted 7 bubbles. Her most notable feature however was her eyes which seemed be looking in every direction but in front of her.

At this point in his life Jon had never witnessed a pony fly before, but even he could infer from her flying patterns that something was off. Derpy, instead of simply flying straight to the desk, flew lazily from side to side at different altitudes almost as if she was intoxicated and her legs danged carelessly instead of being used for balance. This was made all the more awkward by a large satchel bag worn around her neck which seemed to be weighing her down like an anchor. All the while adorning a ditzy looking smile which she will have worn for most of the upcoming interview.

After a while she started to fly slightly off course and looked to be heading straight into the cameraman. Jon took no chances and met the wayward Pegasus halfway. He shook her hoof, much to her joy, and placed an arm around her shoulder to guide her to the appropriate location. Soon the two sat down, with Jon looking at Derpy and Derpy looking everywhere but Jon.

"Glad to have you on the show Derpy," Jon began, "N-now tell me...is Derpy your real name? I mean do you have a last name or are you like Cher with the one?" Derpy responded with a slight laugh, though she didn't know what was so funny.

"Oh no Jon, my name is Derpy Hooves!" She said, throwing her hooves in the air.

"Derpy...'Hooves'?" Jon said quizzically, noting that her rate of speech was slightly 'off'. "That's your name?"

"It sure is!" She said in excitement, as she scratched the back of her ear with her hind leg messing up her already messed up hair. Jon began to wonder if the term 'special guest' was more applicable than he had thought.

"Well it's a pleasure to have you on the show Derpy Hooves." He said, once again shaking the young Pony's hoof. "My name is Jon Feet." This caused Derpy to once again laugh but again she laughed for the wrong reason.

"Oh Jon, that's not your name!" She said, shaking her head. "Your name is Jon Stewart...you're such a silly!"

"I guess I am." Jon said proudly, brushing away the imaginary dust on his shoulders. "I guess that's why they gave me this gig...speaking of which I hear you're a big fan of the show."

"I sure am!" Derpy exclaimed, her wings now standing on end. "I watch your show everyday! I even made my own stage and desk and pretend to talk to an audience... like you!"

Jon felt flattered at his guest's wanting to be like him.

"Well uh... if I've never in the neighborhood maybe I'll drop by as a guest of yours." Jon offered which made Derpy's wings spring up in excitement. Quickly she reeled herself back and tried to put on a serious face.

"Weeeell my schedule is quite busy," she began as she fished out a notebook and began to browse through it, each page clearly blank. "Buuut I'm sure I can pencil you in!"

The audience (As well as Jon to a lesser degree) laughed at her attempt to sound professional. They were slowly falling in love with her.

"You know I uh- I gotta ask," he said, waving his hand in a circular motion. "You say you watch the show all the time but... uh, you are from a different world entirely. Do you ever get confused at some of things that...that we talk about." Derpy fell silent for a moment, her eyes occasionally changing positions.

"Most of the time yes, but some of the things you say are just so darn funny I...I just can't help but watch!" She said holding back a laugh. "Like how you used to make fun of that Bush fellow." It took Jon but only a moment to realize what she was talking about.

"You mean our former president George Bush?" He asked.

"Yeah yeah!" Derpy said. "I used to loooove that!" Before Jon could comment on his guest's last statement, Derpy (Who inadvertently dated her self quite a bit) continued by squinting her wall-eyes as she placed both her hooves in front of her.

"'I...am the decider!'" She said, in a low southern sounding voice. "'Heh, heh, heh.'" The crowd erupted in applause at what they had just seen. The sight of a cross-eyed Pegasus doing an impersonation of Jon doing an impersonation of George W. Bush was all the proof he needed that this guest was about to steal the show. Jon waited for the audience to calm down before speaking again.

"So...so what part of the show would you say if your favorite?" Jon asked.

"Hmmm, well let's see...OH! I know I know!" Derpy said, eagerly waiting in her seat like a 747 waiting for permission to take off. Jon's motioned for her to continue and she did.

"I really like it whenever John Oliver is on!" She said, closing her eyes with a slight blush. "I think he's such a cutie!" Jon took this opportunity to poke fun at both Derpy and Oliver.

"Ooooo sorry Derpy,' he cooed, with an obviously forced expression. "I don't mean to break your heart but I don't think Jon would be interes- although he is English so I suppose if anyone would be willing to fuck a horse it'd be him."

The audience laughed with a few of them shouting "Woo!" in a sexual manner, to which Jon had to point out and insist they calm down. Derpy however was once again oblivious to what was going on, though it didn't seem to bother her in the slightest.

"Wha-what I'm saying here is I think you have a chance." Jon added, much to the amusement of the audience.

"So being the uh...Mailmare for an entire town," Jon said. "That must be a lot of hard work.'

"It sure is!" She replied. "But it's also a lot of fun! I get to meet all kinds of interesting people and they don't mind when I mess up too bad."

"What do you mean by 'mess up too bad.'" He asked, feeling somewhat worried.

"Well like sometimes I deliver the wrong letter to the wrong person," she said. "And sometimes instead of putting someones mail in their mailbox I accidentally put it in their chimney or in the gutter." Jon wanted to laugh at her joke but something told him that she wasn't joking at all.

"And this one time somepony mailed some other pony a package and it was ticking," she continued. "But I lost it on my way there so it never got delivered."

"That's...very interesting." Jon said, with a look of concern on his face. "Tell me...how did you get to be the Mailmare again?"

"Oh that's easy," she said. "No pony else wanted to do it. So I volunteered."

"Wait...so if no one else ever wanted to do this job, then, I mean- who's covering your rounds right now?"

"No pony is," Derpy replied, lifting her large satchel bag onto the desk. "I'm supposed to be delivering the mail right now, but I'm sure no pony will mind if take some time off to be here. The audience laughed as Jon buried his face in his hands. He tried to quickly change the subject.

"So, Derpy," he continued looking around as if a new topic would fall in his lap. "You...you're the first pony I've ever had on the show! This is...that's quite milestone. But I've met with your princess and I've noticed you two have very different characteristics."

"We do?" Derpy responded.

"Yes uh, yes you do. For one she's a lot bigger than you, and Celestia if you're watching that wasn't a fat joke." Jon announced, pointing at a camera. "But what I find...interesting is she has both wings and a horn."

"She does!" Derpy responded, much to the confusion of Jon who wondered if she had any idea what her leader looks like? "Oh wow she's so lucky! I wish I had horns and wings."

Now Jon went from being confused to being perplexed.

"B-but Derpy you do have wings." Jon said, pointing to her back. Derpy, looking somewhat lost now, arched herself to look over her shoulder. She flapped her wings a few times to be sure they were hers, unintentionally slapping herself across the face in the process.

"Oh yeah, I guess I do," She said, looking embarrassed. "I guess I forgot." Jon shook his head and tried to not laugh at his guest.

"I-I know exactly how you feel," Jon retorted, straightening out his notes. "Sometimes I myself forget how to eat and I find myself just staring at my breakfast till it all comes back to me." Derpy's mouth hanged open in astonishment.

"YOU TOO?!" She responded, with a gasp. Jon could hold back his laughter no more.

He didn't know if this was all just an act or if his new feathered friend really was this daft. Either way he found it impossible to not like her. After he found his breath he continued to question her.

"So hey you have a book out don't ya!" He said, fighting off the occasional left over chuckle.

"I sure do!" She replied. "It's called: "50 shades of muffins," I made it all by myself! It's my favorite book ever!" Had it been any other guest, Jon would've considered them to be very conceited for choosing their own work as their favorite book. But this wasn't any other quest; with Derpy he saw nothing but pure innocence in her crooked eyes.

"What's your favorite book, Jon?" Derpy asked getting somewhat off topic.

"Oh, mine? I would have to saaaay...probably 'Where's Waldo,'" Jon said, nodding. He noticed the confusion on her face he decided to elaborate. "It's a children's book where you find a popular character whose always hiding in the background. But I'm sure you know nothing about that."

"Sounds like fun!" Derpy said, clapping her hooves together.

"Oh it is, but for now I really want to talk about your book," Jon said, puling out a massive book from under his desk. "Now this, from what I can gather is a cookbook, am I right."

"That is correct!" She said, with a proud look on her face.

"Now...my wife- my wife has a cook book or two and each of them probably mentions muffins once or twice but this," Jon said, lightly tossing the book on the desk with a large audible thud. "This is a cookbook only about muffins. It's enormous, and thick enough to beat sharks to death with. I mean what gives?

"Well Jon," Derpy said, sounding like she could be serious. "I LOVE muffins!" Jon gave her a look as if to say 'no really,' but opted to not say anything as this was the first time she'd said anything regarding her book.

"I love them sooo much that I just want the whole world to feel what I feel," she continued. "I want to bring awareness to all the different kinds of muffins there are in the world."

"No kidding," Jon interjected, turning to a page after page in her book. "I mean look at what we have here: 'Blueberry muffins,' 'hazelnut muffins,' 'apple muffins,' 'chocolate muffins,' 'upside down muffins,' 'super muffins,' 'dark world muffins' ...you even have something called the 'muffin muffins.'"

"Oh that one's my favorite!" Derpy said with a huge smile. "It's a muffin made from other muffins!"

"Now...your book also says, 'How a simple food product can change your life,'" Jon stated, pointing at the cover. "How is this possible? Are the muffins prepared with...some kind of uh special magic that can enrich a person's life...or something like that?" In time Jon would look back at these interviews and revel at how he would mention 'magic' so casually.

"Nope." Derpy said, pausing for a moment. "They just taste really yummy." Jon wanted to comment but suddenly a look of realization found its way onto Derpy's face as she placed both her hooves over her mouth.

"OH I ALMOST FORGOT!" She said. "I have something for you, Jooooon." He could only speculate as to what the young Pegasus was talking about.

"Oh really?" he said. "What is it?" Derpy motioned for Jon to stay where he was as she buried her head completely in her satchel bag, irresponsibly spilling sealed letters on the ground in the process. When she emerged she had a lone muffin clenched in her smiling mouth. She placed the muffin in the table and pushed it closer to him.

"This is for you!" She said, proudly. "It's an extra special muffin for an extra special person!" Jon couldn't help but smile at the kindness of this pony who he had only known for a few minutes. Before Jon could thank her she spoke again.

"Go ahead, try it!" She said, with immense excitement. He took the muffin in his hand and turned to the audience to get their take of what he should do; knowing full well what their answer would be.

"What do you think?" He asked them. "Should I try it?" His question was met by a wave of support in the form of cheering, clapping, and a small chant of "EAT IT, EAT IT, EAT IT!" Jon eventually took a bite causing the audience, and even Derpy, to clap with elation.

"Not bad," he said, his mouth full as he placed it back down on the table. "I like it!" His compliment caused Derpy to flap her wings furiously with glee.

"Oh I'm so glad to like it!" She said. I was up all night making it juuuuust right!" Jon took a moment to swallow the last bit of muffin in his mouth and wiped his desk of any loose crumbs before continuing.

"So...so why do you like muffins so much," Jon asked, wiping his hands together. "I mean...don't get me wrong I enjoy a good muffin every now and then but it almost seems like you're...obsessed." Derpy didn't say anything at first, she just stared in no particular direction. If she was thinking about what to say next it was completely evident to Jon.

"Weeell I'll tell you why," Derpy said. "But you have to promise to keep it a secret." Jon slowly turned his head to the direction of the cameras and audience who responded him with a slight chuckle. He agreed and she continued.

"Well you see, Jon...you may not notice this but my eyes are kind of crooked." She said with a whisper, unaware of how fruitless it was with the microphone attached to her ear.

"I honestly hadn't notice." He responded with a straight face.

"Well they are," She said. "And when I was a little filly some of the other kids would make fun of me for it..." As she continued Jon could sense a heart felt story on its way. He had no idea.

"...And when they did it would make me very sad and I would sometimes cry," She continued. "But, my mother always always knew how to cheer me up! She would bake a big ol' batch of muffins for me. This always made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!" The audience as well as Jon dared not make a noise as she went on.

"Sadly though, a few years ago she passed away. But whenever I eat a muffin I still feel that same warm and fuzzy feeling as if she's still here with me." She said, not showing a hint of sadness or animosity. Just the same quirky smile she had the rest of the interview. "That's why I made this cookbook! So that people all over the world can feel the same happiness that I do!"

It took Jon a moment to respond, as he wanted to make sure his next words were appropriate.

"Whoa, that was very beautiful." He finally said. "Thank you for sharing. It sounds like she was a very...very loving person." Derpy looked at Jon, her expression changed to that of confusion.

"Who was?" She asked, tilting her head to one side. Jon soon had a look of confusion on his face which neatly mirrored Derpy's.

"Y-your mother." He responded.

"What about my mother." She replied slightly furrowing her brow.

"Oh n-n-no I was just saying, you know based on what you- I was just saying how your mom seemed very..." Jon stumbled to try and make sense of what was going on, but was only met with more confused looks from his guest. "...Derpy have you already forgotten what you just told me.

"Oh...I guess I did," Derpy said, guiltily rubbing the back of her head. "My bad."

Before she could even attempt to recall what happened, and situate herself accordingly, her wandering eyes noticed the muffin that she herself had given Jon on the table. She lunged forward, almost as if she was about to tackle Jon, her eyes big and her wings flapping freely.

"OOOOO A MUFFIN!" She exclaimed, now looking at Jon. "Hey are you gonna finish that!?" Jon threw both his arms in the air, surrendering to Derpy's advances.

"You know what, Derpy?" He said, with a large smile on his face. "You go right ahead." Within an instant, as the audience cheered her on, Derpy flung herself onto the table devouring the muffin withing seconds. Getting crumbs all over her face, mane, and Jon's suit. When she was done she looked up at him, with only one eye actually looking in his direction.

"I love muffins!" She said, with the same smile she had for most of the interview.

"I know you do." Jon said, lovingly patting her on the head.

"Thank you being here today Derpy you were fantastic." Jon said, turning to the audience. "Her new book, 50 shades of muffins, is on the book shel-" Before he could finish his outro Derpy began violently waving her hands back and forth in an overambitious attempt to get his attention.

"WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, JON!" She said, now slightly hovering over him.

"Before we go can I make a quick shout out to somepony?!" Jon didn't have the heart to say no. He agreed and Derpy flew slightly higher and looked at one of the cameras (Though due to her eye sight, she was looking slightly off from where it actually was).

"HI DINKY!" She yelled. "LOOK I'M ON TV! MAMA LOVES YOU!"

Jon playfully sighed and stood up from his chair.

"It been great having you on the show, today." Jon said with an honest smile. "Her new book is called 50 shades of muffins, its on the book shelves now. Derpy Hooves, everyone! We'll be right back."

The audience, who as this point were cheering well before Jon's sign off, begun chanting Derpy's name as the camera paned away from Jon trying, and failing, to get the excited Pegasus to come down. Soon afterwards the show transitioned to it's last commercial ending another episode of "The Daily show with Jon Stewart."

Episode 3 [Applejack]: The farm

It had been a few days since Jon had an Equestrian citizen on his show. Not because people had stopped watching them, quite the opposite; after the interview with Derpy the world was once again in a state of Insatiability.

The reason why Jon hadn't invited another person from Equestria on his show was because he had his hands full dealing with the backlash of unleashing the loveable Derpy on the world. Much like before people from all walks of life were in a frenzy about the interview but unlike before a majority of the attention wasn't on Jon or the 'Daily Show' (Though they were getting still holding the number one spot in the ratings) but on Derpy herself. Shortly after the interview the world had fallen in love her and she became a house hold name in less than a day.

Comedy Central, seeing the opportunity in this, offered to act as publishers for Derpy's and sold copies of her cook book on their website. On average it took less than 20 minutes for her book to be sold out and this occurred everyday at regular intervals. Jon himself was busy contacting Derpy and relaying messages, essentially acting as the "Go-to person" for both parties, mostly due to the fact that he was the only one on earth with direct contact to her or her world.

Jon also had to deal with countless people requesting to meet with her and others requesting her appearance on whatever given show. Jon had to turn them all away. The official reason was because Celestia didn't like the idea of anyone other than Jon doing business with her subjects. The unofficial reason, which Jon provided to the public via a press release, was that she needed to go back home to fulfill her civil duties as a the mailmare.

What all this meant was he had very little time to think about "Equestrian interviews," so to fill the gap he did his show normally but when it came time for the interview segment, much to the disappointment of many fans, Jon talked with a lower profile individual that he had lined up months ago as filler. This only made the fans wanting for "Equestrian interviews" even greater as displayed by their constant sending of letters, videos, tweets, and many forms of messages. All varying differently in style but all with the same message. We want more!

It was now Saturday night and Jon had managed to (Very easily) convince the executives back at the station to move some programs around for a special Sunday edition of 'The Daily Show.' He wanted to give the fans what they wanted.

The two free days he had leading up to Sunday were used by Jon responsibly. He made phone calls to Celestia only asking for information on some people on the list for future reference. He even got the chance to send the occasional letter or phone call, via Celestia, to various Equestrian citizens requesting their appearance on the show at a later date. This way Jon could set up appearances ahead of time making scheduling much simpler. And, if need be, have a filler or two for any last minute hiccups.

But for now Jon had only one thing on his mind. Who was going to appear as a guest on the special Sunday edition of the show?

"I can't just have anyone on for tomorrow," Jon thought. "Whoever this person is he or she needs to be big." Jon at one point even thought about asking Celestia herself to appear on the show but with further thought decided that it wouldn't be the best idea...at least not right now.

Jon was now sitting atop his desk in his study staring at the list of names Celestia had given him and there at the very top was the same selection of names in bold text. Jon had previously deduced that these names belonged to some very important people of Equestria; partly because they were at the top and in bold but also because among those names was the princess Celestia's as well.

However six of the names were also grouped together in a bracket with the title "E.O.H." These names in order were: Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Applejack. Jon recognized the fist name from his interview with Spike but the other five were a mystery to him. Jon had been doing this for many years and experience had taught him that if you have a high profile celebrity willing to appear on your show you save it for a rainy day. This of course being one of them.

One name however jumped out at him and just as well it was the one located at the bottom of the bracket.

Looking back Jon liked to think he picked this particular name because of the context of the character associated with it. That the person who this name belonged to was someone of utmost importance to the pony community and that she deserved the attention and resulting glory that came with it. But in reality he chose this this particular name simply because it sounded the funniest to him. Applejack...what a silly name.

A few quick dials on his phone later and Jon was once again talking with Celestia, and for the first time he knew exactly who he wanted before hand.

"Greetings, Jon. Its nice to hear from you again," Celestia said without falter. "Do you wish for me to bestow on you more information on somepony?"

"Actually I"m scheduled to go on the air tomorrow," Jon responded. "And I want to talk to you about having someone on that show for an interview."

"Oh that's wonderful." She said kindheartedly, "I was wondering when you would ask again. Though isn't tomorrow a Sunday?"

"Exactly," Jon said, "I managed to get the higher-ups to schedule a show tomorrow. A special occasion like this demands a special guest." Celestia couldn't have agreed more.

"Yes I can certainly see where your coming from." She responded, nodding her head. "I don't suppose you already have someone in mind?" Jon sat up in his chair as if ready to get up at any moment.

"Actually I do," he said, surprising Celestia somewhat. "Tell me, what do you know about...Applejack." She took a second to respond.

"Ahhh Applejack," she responded, sounding as if she was remembering a long lost friend. "If that's who you wish to have on your show next then I must say its a wise choice. I'm certain you'll learn all you need to know during your interview with her but for now I'll say this...she is without a doubt that most honest pony you'll ever meet."

The answering was short and simple, but good enough for Jon.

"Well alright then!" Jon said, sounding like a champion about to defend his title. "Lets set this up!"

"Certainly," Celestia said with a level of excitement much less than Jon's. "After we're done talking I'll summon her to the palace to address the issue. I'm certain that she-"

"Actually," he interrupted, feeling somewhat nervous that he did. "If its all the same with you I want to ask her myself...in person."

"Is that so?" Celestia said, sounding surprised. "Well this is certainly new of you." Jon was still a little uncomfortable with someone of royalty being his personal middle-man, (Lord knows he knew the feeling between Derpy and his studio) but this wasn't why he offered to ask himself. In this particular instance he felt a more direct approach was in order.

"Hey now, I get my own coffee ever now and again," Jon replied jokingly. "But really, I just figured that with someone like this a face to face meeting would be appropriate...that is if she's as important as she seems to be." Celestia found herself humbled by Jon's sense of reverence for the situation.

"I see, how very honorable of you," She said, sounding pleased. "I knew I picked the right person to do this." Jon couldn't help but feel flattered. It wasn't everyday that he was praised by royalty.

"Now then," Celestia continued, readying her horn. "Shall I transport you to her."

"Wait!" He said desperately. "Give me a few minutes." Celestia agreed and Jon put her on hold as he dashed over to his closet.

The last time Jon visited Equestria was the night he got the list of names and the letter explaining what to do with it. That night, in an effort to prove she was real, Celestia teleported him to her royal palace where he had the ill fortune of conducting business with her for the first time in his pajamas.

Jon wasn't going to make the same mistake again. If he was going back to Equestria, on business no less, he was going to do it right.

It took him about fifteen minutes but he eventually adorned himself in a neat black suit, complete with: clean pressed pants, matching jacket, and a tie which (According the collective opinions of his female co-workers) really brought out the color in his eyes. In addition his hair was neatly done, though it was no where near as good as when he was on stage thanks in part to his hair dresser. But for now it would have to do; he was ready.

"Alright, fire away!" He said to Celestia, this time remembering to stand up straight and keep his eyes closed. Celestia acknowledged him and begun to cast her spell. For a moment Jon wondered if he was still in his study but before he could open his eyes to check a light surrounded him so bright that he noticed it through his tightly shut eyelids.

Soon his other senses picked up on telltale signs that he wasn't in his home anymore. The ground beneath his feet felt different, his nose picked up on the smell of wilderness all around him and the beating sun combined with the occasional gust of wind told him he wasn't indoors.

"Where the hell am I now?" Jon thought as he slowly opened his eyes. Back in New York it was still dark but wherever he was now it was bright as could be. Jon squinted and shielded his eyes like he had just emerged from a dark movie theater.

As his eyes adjusted he quickly realized where he was much to his dismay. The last time he was in Equestria he was in the royal chambers of a princess and while this new location was just as surreal it couldn't be any more different. He was on a farm...a chicken coop having, barn yard adjacent, cow pie infested, honest to good farm.

"Well...at least I'm not under dressed." Jon thought with a grimace as a gust of wind blew some dirt onto his pants and dress shoes.

To his right Jon could see an enormous acre of evergreen trees that seemed to go for miles; Jon couldn't see very far inside as it got very dark very fast. To his left he saw a hill with many apple trees just behind it. In front of him was a few buildings which Jon prayed housed some forms of life.

Jon was more accustomed to city life than the country side but even someone like him could tell how this was no ordinary farm. For starters the surrounds and texture of damn near everything was much more vibrant than what one would expect and, like everything else associated with this world, none of it looked real.

With a deep sigh Jon made his way to the nearest building walking gingerly across the terrain as if it were infested with land mines. He was about half way there before a voice seized his attention.

"Who in the hay are you?" A soft voice said from behind.

Jon carefully turned around to see a small yellow Earthpony with red hair and a large pink bow on her head. The young filly was looking up at him with large eyes and much to Jon's surprise she did not have wings or a horn. Her voice, and noticeably small height, told him that whoever this pony was she was but a mere child.

"Uh...hey." Jon said, mentally adjusting himself to talk appropriately. "My name is Jon...um, where am I?" The young pony gave a large smile and answered with a burst of enthusiasm that only a child could give for something as simple as a greeting.

"Well howdy Jon! It's a pleasure to meet you! " The young filly said, extending her hoof towards the buildings behind him. "This here is Sweet apple Acres!" Jon noted that since the this pony knew the farm's name and was already in the area she most likely lived here. Could this be his new guest?

"Sweet apple acres huh? Would've been nice to know that a head of time." He grumbed, only to remember why he was here in the first place. "Oh, uh say...are you Applejack."

"Heck no," she said with a laugh. "I'm Applebloom!" Jon wondered if the recurring theme of apples was somehow related or just coincidence.

"Oh I see. Do you know Applejack?" Jon asked.

"Well of course I do! Everypony knows Applejack!" She said with a proud look on her face. "She's mah sister!"

Before Jon could ask where he could find his potential guest the young Earthpony began to speak again. It was now her turn to start asking the questions.

"What are ya anyway?" Applebloom said.

"Um excuse me?" Jon replied.

"What are ya?" She repeated louder, now circling Jon like a shark. "You sure aint no pony I've ever seen."

"I'm not a pony," he said. "I'm a human."

"A human? Whats that?" She asked as she continued to observe him.

"Uh...It's...what I am." Jon said, unsure of how to go about answering such a question. "Uh, but listen I really need to--"

"Where you from, Jonny?" Applebloom interrupted.

"Oh well I'm from New York?" He responded, suddenly feeling like he was under a microscope. "But that's not imp--"

"New York?" Applebloom said, looking confused. "Where's that?"

"Uuum... its that way." Jon said, pointing in a random direction. "Now could you please tell me wh--"

"What do you do in New York?" She asked. Jon was started to get annoyed.

"I have my own television show," he said. "But listen please I really need to speak with--"

"Wait a minute!" Applebloom interrupted, "You have your own T.V. show!? Are you Jon Stewart?!" Jon's frustration now gave way to a sense of bewilderment.

"Uh yes- yes I am. I host 'The Daily Show." Jon said. The mere mention of the show seemed to resonate with the young Earthpony as her face lit up in excitement.

"Do...do you watch the show?" Jon said, secretly hoping that she didn't. He didn't have any puritanical hang-ups on children watching his show. (He himself could recall a time in his life where he would sneak a peek at a nudey magazine at a local drug store when his mother wasn't looking, its just what kids do.) But seeing one in person would've be somewhat awkward.

"No I don't." She replied, looking rather disappointing. "The older ponies won't let us fillys watch it...t'ain't fair." Jon found it interesting, though not surprising, that forms of censorship existed in this world as well.

Applebloom fell silent for a moment as she continued to display her disapproval by kicking at the ground. Jon took this moment of silence to ask her the question he wanted to ask in the first place.

"Listen Appleboom," he said, "Do you know where your sister is right now?" She looked back up at Jon, her expression back to looking cheerful.

"Why sure I do! She's right over that clearing gathering apples." She said, pointing in the direction of the apple trees.

"Why do ya wanna know? Is she in some kind of--" Before she could finish her sentence a sense of realization swept over her face as her jaw dropped. She spread all four of her legs slightly apart in a stance as if she was bracing herself for a head on collision with a wild bull.

"WAIT A SECOND!" Applebloom blurted excitedly. "Are you fixin to invite mah sister on your fancy pants show!?" Jon had found his opening.

"Yep! You got me!" Jon said with a smile, as he lowered himself closer to her level. "Now, would you be a sweetheart and go get her for me?"

"I sure can, Jonny!" She said as she bolted off towards the hill so quickly she almost tripped over her own hoof.

As Jon waited for her inevitable return he continued to walk over to the nearest building where he found a rocking chair on a porch to sit on. For a brief moment he felt strangely at ease as he let himself rock back and forth. Maybe it was fresh air, or the fact that he was so far away from the hustle and bustle of the big city, but he felt a sense of relaxation he hadn't felt in a while.

His brief moment of isolation was soon interrupted by the familiar voice of Applebloom shouting nearby.

"JONNY, JONNY!" She said. "WHERE ARE YA!?" The angle of the house meant that she couldn't see him, not without venturing further in. Before he could respond another voice was heard, this one much older sounding and whoever it was she was talking to young Applebloom.

"Now, sugar cube," the other voice said. "What have I told you l about fibbin'?"

"But, sis," Applebloom pleaded. "He was right here, I swear!"

"Sure he was," the other voice said in jest. "Now why don't y'all go and play with you friends while I finish gatherin' up the last batch of apples." Jon wanted to see how far he could stay out of sight before being found but decided to stop torturing the poor filly and unveil himself.

With that he got up from his chair and quickly rounded the corner to surprise the natives.

"Howdy Pardner!" He said jokingly.

His sudden appearance surprised the two Earthponies who were were a lot closer than Jon thought. Applebloom jumped back in shock but unfortunately the other pony present had other plans as she very quickly turned around and with all her might threw her hind legs at Jon in a swift but devastating kicking motion.

Before Jon could even realize what had happened he was already a few feet away from where he was standing. Flat on his back on the dirty ground, the wind knocked out of him, and two perfect hoof prints on his new button down shirt. If his suit wasn't ruined before it was now.

Before Jon could even begin to get up he was greeted by the two Earthponies. One of whom was of course Applebloom and the other was one he did not recognize. This new pony was orange and had blonde hair which was slightly covered by a brown cowboy hat. Her cutie mark was three apples and she looked to be even dirtier than Jon. He knew exactly who this was.

"I'm so sorry!" The orange pony said. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Jon said getting up. He looked over at his freckled attacker who had a look of worry on her face. "Applejack, I presume?"

Episode 3 [Applejack]: Please welcome to the show Applejack

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Applejack (AJ)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

The set of the Daily show looked different this time around. The stage designers figured that a special Sunday edition of the show needed a special set design; what they couldn't figure out though was why Jon insisted that haystacks be strewn around the set and that the backdrop be changed to that of John Chapman farm.

The only idea that made sense to them was the decision to add some extra seats to house more people. An effort that was well managed as attendance was just as prominent and immediate as ever.

The crowd soon found themselves cheering again as the camera paned all around them in a circular motion, to let viewers see the many people in attendance and the new set. The camera view then changed to one zooming in on Jon himself who could be seen finishing up a final point in his notes.

"Welcome back to 'The Daily Show' my guest tonight, ooooh we got a good one for you today," Jon said, rubbing his stomach. "She is a member of an elite team of ponies known as the 'Elements of Harmony,' and one of the owners of Ponyville's primary supplier of apples, please welcome to the show, Applejack!

The crowd erupted in applause as Applejack made her way on the stage looking very much the same as she always does except for two bags hanging on either side of her. At the request of Jon the music that usually accompanies every guest was changed to something a little more representing of his guest. Jon met his guest half way and leaned forward to shake her hoof and wave at the audience, giving them a momentary photo-op.

The two soon made their way back to the desk where Jon offered to help Applejack onto her seat. This was unnecessary as she managed to get on her chair by herself in a single leap, looking slightly proud of herself as she did. Jon, in a silly attempt to intimidate this, jumped into his seat as well throwing his arms in the air as if to say "What now?"

He waited for the audience to calm down before speaking, which he noticed took longer than usual.

"Welcome to the program Applejack," Jon said, organizing his notes. "We're really glad to have you here today."

"Thank ya kindly. Oh and you can call me AJ," She responded, taking a moment to look around. "I like what you've do with the place."

"I know right," he said, "I figured you'd like it. We had our interns stay up all night putting this together. I'm telling we had so many unpaid workers walking around carrying heaps of haystacks."

"Y'all didn't have to go through all the trouble, on my account" She said, tilting her hat. "I'm just like any other pony out there, I put my saddle on one hoof at a time." As the crowd laughed she noticed that Jon once again was rubbing his stomach where she had previously kicked him.

"Oh and uh, sorry again about before." She said with a guilty smile on her face.

"That's right, you- let me tell you guys about this one," Jon said, turning to the audience. "So I go to her farm to see if she wants to appear on my show...and wouldn't you know she kicks me half way back to Brooklyn!"

"Like I said I'm sorry!" Applejack responded defensively. "I feel powerfully guilty about what happened but y'all scared me! Plus my little sister was with me, I was just tryin'to protect us"

"Well aint that just like hic!" Jon said, shaking his head and switching to his 'New york accent'. "A stranger, whose species you've never seen before, suddenly appears on your private property and aaall you can think to do is defend your baby sister from potential danger...you make me sick!" The audience as well as Applejack laugh while Jon still gave her a look of fake disgust.

"Oh and be the way!" Jon contnued, pretending to hold back tears, "...when I went and visited you I was dressed to the nine but when you come and visit me, nothing....not even a change of hat."

"Hey now, that's not entirely true!" She said quickly. "I let them fancy backroom folk of yours do my hair." Jon could barely notice. The only thing different about her this time around, as far as he could tell, was she wasn't covered in a thin layer of dirt.

"I even changed the stage for you," Jon continued on his fake rant. "Aaaand what do- do I get...bupkis!"

"Well actually that's where you're wrong, Jon." Applejack said with a smile. "I did bring ya something!" Before he could respond she reached into one of her bags and pulled out a shiny red apple. She then proceeded to breath on it and rub it against her chest to give it a nice shine.

"Here y'are Jon" She said, tossing him the apple which he almost dropped. "Ya may not be a teacher but I reckon you deserve a nice tasty apple...oh and don't worry I won't eat it later on like somepony I know." Somewhere in a world far from New York a Pegasus just blushed.

"Well thanks AJ." Jon said seriously, taking a bite out of his newly acquired gift. It was the best tasting apple he ever had.

"Well shucks, it aint no problem. Oh, and I think ya forgot about that other gift I gave ya,"Applejack continued. Jon looked baffled. "If y'all reckon back I graciously gave you mah autograph."

"What autograph?" Jon said, as he swallowed his last bite.

"The autograph of the two hoof prints I left on that fancy shirt of yours." She said proudly as she took a sip of her mug of water. Suddenly Jon felt like he was back at Sweet Apple Acres, flat on his back in the dirt. Her perfectly executed rebuttal left him at the mercy of a wave of laughter and applause from the audience. She was off to a good start.

"Just...just don't be offended If I sell it on eBay." Jon said who was barely audible over the crowds continued laughter. It would be a little while before Jon would get up from this one.

"So hey! For those at home wondering is 'Applejack' really your name." Jon asked. Having a guest explain the context behind their name would be a pretty common theme for many interviews to follow.

"That's right Jon," She said, proudly facing the audience. "Applejack at yer service!"

"And you live on a farm...with your brother Frostedflakes and sister FrootLoops ," Jon added as he leaned back in his hair, content with his quick and easy joke.

The audience laughed at the joke and although she didn't understand the reference Applejack kept her cool and carried by not showing a hint of weakness.

"Actually...I do live with some family," She said. "Why I got kin all over Equestria I reckon. But at Sweet Apple Acres I live with: mah Grandma; Granny Smith, a younger sister by the name of Applebloom, and an older brother; good ol' Big Macintosh."

Jon assumed ahead of time that he would only recognize one of those names, as he had already met her little sister when he visited the farm, but to his surprise he could actually identify another name.

"Oh Big Macintosh is your brother?" Jon asked, much to the surprise of Applejack, who wasn't expecting a stranger from another world to speak of her brother with such familiarity.

"Wait a gosh darn minute!" Applejack said, her confidence now starting to diminish somewhat. "How in the hay do you know my brother?" It was a valid question which Jon figured deserved a non-valid answer.

"Why I'll have you know...me and Big Mac go waaaay back!" He said, trying to sound serious. "I remember this one time we got busted for shop lifting at the local pet store." She didn't buy it for a second, as evident by a look on her face like someone had just told her the world was flat.

"Honestly though, I don't really 'know' him per se. Over the "break" I had uh- I had the opportunity to call and write random people to see if they'd come on my show...you know at some point in the future maybe," Jon continued. "And one of the people I called was actually your brother it would seem."

"Well how'd ya like that!" Applejack said, once again sounding proud. "A big time city slicker like you asking my brother to appear on T.V.! So what did the big guy say?"

"See that's the strange part," Jon said. "I can remember the conversation we had so perfectly because we- because it was so...brief." Applejack was beginning to see where this was going.

"Here, I'll show you," he added, sitting up in his chair. "This is exactly how it went:"

"Hi, is this...Big Macintosh?"

"Yep."

"Listen my name is Jon Stewart, I'm the host of 'The Daily Show,' and I was wondering

if you would like to appear on my show sometime?

"Nope."

"And that was it!" Jon finished.

The audience began to laugh at Jon's story but it was Applejack who was laughing the hardest.

"Yessiree, that's my brother alright!" She said still laughing. "He's...he's sorta the strong silent type."

"Yeah I gathered." Jon said, sounding unamused.

"Yeah, but don't take it personally he's like that with everypony." Applejack said with a sigh as she looked over her shoulder at the backstage. "It's gonna be hard not seeing my family for awhile."

"So yeah what's this I hear about you staying in New York for a few day?" Jon asked, sounding somewhat concerned. "I saw you had some luggage backstage and everything."

"Well Jon," She said. "I've decided to stay here for a little while to take in the sights and improve my knowledge in the field of apples...uh, no pun intended"

"Now don't get be wrong New York is a beautiful place," Jon interjected. "But I just don't see a country girl like you being anywhere near a big city. Besides how will you- how will staying here a few days help you on the farm in even the slightest."

"Well for starters I'm fixin to go and find that giant apple I've heard so much about." She said her eyes wide with excitement.

"I'm sorry," Jon said leaning forward, unsure of what she meant. "Your going to try and find...a giant apple?"

"That's right!," She responded. "I hear talk that y'all are famous for having a big apple somewhere round these parts." It took Jon a moment but he finally understood what she meant.

"I uh- I hate to break it to you AJ but New York is called 'The Big Apple,'" He said, sounding sorry for her. Though in actuality he found this to be quite rich. "We don't actually have any giant apples...really anywhere."

This sudden news came to a big let down for Applejack as displayed by her ears drooping down. She began to look sad then annoyed.

"What! But I- I mean who...who in there right mind would name a darn city after an apple when they aint even got any?!" Applejack said now standing on all four hoofs.

"Well every city in America has little quirks like that I suppose," Jon said trying to make her feel better. "I mean look at...uh, San Francisco over on the west coast. I mean they have the Golden Gate."

"Are you tellin' me that there's a city out there that has a gate made entirely out of gold!?" Applejack said as she sat back down, momentarily mesmerized by what she just heard.

"Well no you see that's...that's just a clever name," He pointed out. "'Golden Gate' is actually a big red bridge." Applejack was now more confused than ever. She gave Jon a perplex look and continued on her mini rant.

"What! I don't even...see now this is why I don't like you city folk," Applejack said, looking like she was just betrayed. "Y'all are just too darn confusin'!"

"Are you still thinking about staying here for a bit?" Jon asked sincerely. "Because I can get one of the boys in the back to carry your stuff."

"Hmmm? Weeell maybe I will stay for spell," She said, which earned her an audience member or two yelling out in excitement. "I mean I can still go to those fancy stores that sell only apples. Maybe even compare some of them with mine." This time Jon knew exactly what she meant but nonetheless had to correct her.

"Yeeaaah...I'm pretty sure you're thinking of 'Apple stores,'" He said. "They don't actually sell apples. They mostly just sell computers and cellphones." Applejack was about to say something but instead threw her hooves up in the air and fell back in her chair in a gesture that indicated that she had given up.

Jon tried not to laugh at the obvious frustration of his guest but the audience held nothing back she they laughed an applauded at the orange Earthpony.

"You've obviuosly been given some...some false information here," Jon said with a chuckle. "I mean 'Big Apple,' 'Apple Store,' who in there- who told you about these things?"

"I heard about all these from..." She paused, taking a second to try and remember, which caused her to facehoof herself in frustration. "...from Derpy." The audience began to laugh and cheer with Jon joining them this time.

"Well...well there's your problem right there!" Jon said, still in a state of laughter.

"Yeah she...she told me about these things when she came back home after being interviewed by you." She said, now avoiding eye contact out of embarrassment.

"...You're not staying here after the show, are you?" Jon asked.

"No...no I'm not." Applejack replied, downing the entire mug of water with a sigh.

"City life just confuses me," She finally said, looking behind her at the new backdrop. "Now that's where I belong...I can't help it, I'm a country gal through and through." Looking over the backdrop even more she spots a figure adjacent to the farm. It was a man which by all accounts looked to be a farmer. He had no shirt on, a pitch fork over his shoulder, and he was standing atop a hill wiping the sweat from his brow.

"Looky here," she said, pointing at the man. "Now that's a feller I can really sit down and have a cider a with. Who is he?"

"That? That would be Johnny Appleseed " Jon said, leaning back in his chair. "He's famous for introducing apple trees to many parts of America when it first got founded."

"Hooowy! Now that's a real man!" Applejack exclaimed, almost looking as if she was swooning. "...Uh, no offense Jon." He was about to respond with a joke of his own but the timing would have been off since we got cut off by the laughs of the crowd. So instead he decided to carry on the interview with an easy question.

"You really do love your life back at the farm don't you?"

"Sure do! Sweet Apple Acres is the place to be!" She replied with delight. "Farm livin' is the life for me; land spreadin' out so far and wide. Keep Manehattan, just give me that countryside." Jon was impressed by her love of the simple life but nevertheless he couldn't help but disagree.

"I'm sorry AJ but it's all about New York. Am I right people!" He yelled and stood to the crowd, who responded by standing and cheering." After they stopped Jon sat back down to meet his guest who was pretending to ignore them.

"So about Sweet Apple Acres...what would you say is your primary occupation on that farm?" Jon inquired. "What in a nutshell is it that you do?"

"Well Jon we all do great deal of things back home, everypony pitches in to do their fair share," she responded modestly. "As for me though, I do most of bucking."

Had Jon been drinking from his mug at that point he probably would have done a spit take.

"I'm s-sorry but wh- you...did you say 'bucking?'" Jon asked with increasing concern.

"Course I did!" Applejack said with pride. "Best Apple bucker in all of Ponyville, thank you very much!" Jon took a second to respond both for the audience to stop laughing for himself to understand what she meant.

"OH! 'bucking!'" Jon said, now understanding. "You...y-you kick things."

"Not just anything," She replied. "I buck tree's so I can get their apples."

Jon had always considered himself to be a standing professional in the field of comedy, especially when it came to the show. But in this case he felt some middle school humor was in order.

"Oh I see," he said trying not to laugh. "So if I'm hearing you correctly...you 'buck' for a living."

"That's one way of putting it, yes." She said with an innocent smile.

"So tell us, Applejack," Jon continued. "How old were you when you first started 'bucking?'"

"Why I reckon I've been bucking since I was just a little filly," She answered, unaware of the consequences of doing so. "Darn proud of it to!"

"How...how often do you 'buck?'" He asked, loving every moment of this.

"Usually depends," She answered honestly. "But on average I'd say at least once a day."

"Wow that's...certainly a lot of 'bucking' you do there." He said holding back an urge to laugh.

"I suppose it is but it's all part of the Job." she responded. "It's a lot of hard work but it also be real fun!"

"Oh really?" He said with a smile. "Please...do tell."

"Well sometimes I like to see how fast I can buck," She said still unaware of anything that was going on. "And other times I like to try different positions." Jon almost bursted out in laughter."

"I-I'm sorry," Jon said with a smile. "But did you say 'positions?'"

"Well of course," Applejack replied. "Sometimes I position myself either closer or further from the tree to see which is best."

"Of course, of course. What was I thinking?" Jon said. "Now...obviously you 'buck' quite a lot so tell me...do you ever wear protection when you...when you 'buck?'"

"Protection? You mean like a helmet or knee pads?" She asked.

"Yes Applejack...like a helmet or knee pads" Jon responded with a nod.

"Uh, no can't say I do." She said, sounding confused. "I don't think I'd like wearin' protection." Jon was finding it harder and harder to not laugh.

"So uh...Applejack." Jon said, motioning to the camera and audience. "What advice would a- would you give for anyone out there who is an inspiring young... lets say 'Bucking enthusiast?'"

"Well for starters what anypony needs to know is size does matter!" She said. It would be a good fifteen seconds before Jon commented on that for he was to busy laughing with the audience, much to Applejack's confusion.

"What- what exactly do you mean by that, dearest Applejack" Jon asked, making a mental note to invite her on the show again in the future.

"Well Jon I'll tell you, sometimes the size of an apple harvest is just too big for one pony to handle by herself," she answered. "Sometimes you need help."

"Oh? So do you ever 'buck' with anyone else?" He asked. "Like, oh I don't know a friend of yours?"

"Weeell I usually buck by myself," she answered. "But if I ever need help I can always rely on mah friends to help me. Like my good friend Rainbow Dash. She may not be as good as me but she really knows what she's doing."

"Applejack..." Jon said. "...you are one bad motherbucker!" The audience seemed to agree as they cheered her on and chanted her name which caused her to blush slightly.

"Uh thanks," She said. "I think."

"So aside from manual labor you help run the farm in other ways, am I right?" Jon asked.

"I reckon so," She answered. "Granny smith don't leave the house much, and Bic Macintosh aint too keen on the business side of things, so I take it upon myself to go the extra mile when it comes to strikin' up deals and such."

"So having said that...would you say you're also a 'business woman?"' Jon asked in more ways than one.

"Well I don't know about all that!" Applejack said with a laugh. "Now my friend Rarity...she's a business woman. And...I love her and all but we couldn't be any more different! Now there's a pony who would like here in the city." Jon made a quick mental note of that and continued.

"You know I gotta say Applejack, I've noticed a few things about you over the course of out interview."

"Oh, and what might those be?" Applejack said, raising an eyebrow.

"Well for one," he said, raising his hand in the air to count off finger by finger. "'Applejack,' 'Applebloom,' 'Sweet Apple Acres,' you buck 'Apples.' I'm sensing a pattern here."

"Well what can I say," She responded, with a playful shrug. "Its a real big part of my life."

"Also," Jon continued. "And I sincerely hope you don't mind me saying, you don't seem to have any wings or horns. This is a first for me. "Jon somewhat regretted asking such a potentially offensive question, but to his credit it was understandable for someone who didn't fully understand pony culture.

"No need to fret Jon," She replied, holding her head up high. "You see its like this. In Equestria there are three kinds of Pony folk: Pegasus, Unicorn, and as for me? Well I'm an Earthpony."

"An Earthpony huh," Jon said, looking intrigued. "So...no horns or wings?"

"Nope, but what we lack in them fancy doohickies we make up for in power." She said slamming a hoof on the table.

"Yeah I know!" Jon said, rubbing his still bruised stomach.

"But don't get me wrong!" She continued. "I love everypony just the same. Matter o' fact my five best friends in the whole entire world are a mixture of all three."

"That's right," he said, "You and your best friends are part of a group called 'The Elements of Harmony'. What do you guys do? Because from what I can gather it almost sounds like you guys are gods."

"Hey now Jon watch what ya say!" Applejack exclaimed, motioning for him to calm down. "We aint nothing big like that. We're just six regular ponies trying to keep the peace is all. See whenever anypony out there tries to start something we're there to set things back on the straight and narrow!"

"Well then how do you go about doing that?" Jon continued. "I mean what is the Elements of Harmony and who- how do you guys utilize it to benefit others." Applejack looked upwards and gave a peaceful sigh.

"You know Jon...sometimes I don't quite understand it myself." She said, looking back at Jon. "The best I can come up with right now is that without these elements our world would fall into chaos." For a moment the entire set fell silent.

"But if you want some in dept details on the subject I'm afraid a simple country gal like me ain't gonna be much help." She said. "Now, if you ever have somepony by the name of Twilight Sparkle on your fancy pants show I recommend askin' her. Trust me when I say she'll talk your ear off with all the things she gots to say."

"Really," Jon continued. "You're just not gonna tell me yourself."

"Sorry Jon, but I guess you can say...I'm passing the buck!" As the crowd laughed Jon was made aware of the time and proceeded as such.

"Well Applejack it has been an absolute delight to have you on the show on this very special episode," Jon said shaking her hoof. "Listen if you have time would you mind staying for a few more minutes and we'll throw the rest up on the web."

"Anything for you Jonny!" She said.

"Thanks again for being here today, you were fantastic, and we must have you back sometime." Jon said now turning to the audience. "Applejack everyone! We'll be right back!"

The audience stood up cheering and applauding as the camera panned away from Jon whispering something into Applejack's ear. The last image of the two is the sight of Applejack challenging Jon to an arm wrestle, only for Jon to back down as the program fades to its final commercial.

Episode 4 [Ms. Cheerilee]: The classroom

"And there goes another one!" Jon thought as he lowered his hand in defeat. If living in the New York had taught him anything it was that hailing a cab is all but impossible. But this didn't stop him for very long and in no short amount of time he was already at it again. He needed to get home right away.

The day started off like any other for him, normal and predictable. But like most days as of late it wouldn't stay that way for very long. Ever since he took on the challenge of interviewing guests from Equestria he noticed that as the day went on it gradually transitioned from routine to blissful-abnormality.

However this time around the break in his usual schedule came in the form of a phone call from a very beloved and important person in his life...his mother. She called Jon at first to congratulate him once more on his recent success (At this point The Daily Show was still number one in the ratings) but then wanted to see if he was free for dinner that night.

Due to his busy schedule, which was now busier than ever, he rarely got the chance to see her, so he agreed. That night Jon and his mother, Marian Leibowitz, sat down at a local restaurant to catch up on things. Jon didn't want to talk about work but she couldn't help but congratulate her son one last time on recent events.

Jon always had the same rule when it came to social gatherings with friends and family. And that rule was: "Never. Talk. Politics." In his experience the mere mention of anything even remotely political could ruin a lovely evening, but unfortunately even with his own mother the topic was unavoidable.

This time around the subject of education came up. More specifically how, in the it's current economic state, the country was beginning to levy cuts to schools, their programs, and teacher's salaries. This line of conversation was not unexpected; Marian herself was a school teacher. She even spoke about some her friends, who were also teachers, and how a few of them lost their jobs due to budget cuts.

This hurt Jon to hear; growing up with a mother who was also a teacher made him a huge proponent of educators and their lifestyles. As a political satirist he knew how education was once again on the chopping block in America but to hear how it was so close to his own mother didn't do much to put him at ease. After their dinner (Which Jon had to admit was very nice despite all things) the two gave each other one last hug and kiss before going their separate ways.

As Jon walked down the semi-crowded street he thought about how much his mom meant to him and how much of an important role she played in his life.

"It was really nice seeing her again." He thought to himself, as he crossed the street. He continued to think about about how much she's done for him and how much he wished he could help both her and those like her. The last time he did something big for a worthwhile cause was his "Rally to Restore Sanity," and before that it was a fundraiser for kids with autism. And while something like that would help raise awareness he knew exactly what those at Comedy Central would say: "Not in the budget right now."

Jon soon found himself at at busy street corner still lost in thought. He wondered if he could have a segment at some point on his show about education. The problem with that idea was that at the moment education reform wasn't the "hot button" issue like it had been in the past. For the time being everyone was talking about the upcoming election and the Olympics going on in London. Both of which were topics Jon knew he had a responsibility to talk about.

Jon all but gave up on the idea, but just as he waved to random driver who let him cross the road an idea popped into his his head...a simple idea but one that only he had the resources to achieve.

But now here came the hard part.

"TAXI!" He shouted, trying to get the attention of a moving vehicle.

Later that night Jon found himself out of breath as he desperately ran up the stairs of his house to get to his study. When he finally arrived to his desired location he quickly and without thinking dialed the number of the only person who could help him right now. Princess Celestia.

"Greetings Jon." She said, "How can I--"

"A school teacher!" Jon blurted out, as he frantically burrowed through the many stacks of paper on his desk, looking for the list of names. "Wasn't there a school teacher on that list!?"

"Well a fine 'hello' to you too," Celestia said with a chuckle. "Dear Jon is everything alright? You sound as if you are in trouble."

"No, no, no, I'm...I'm fine." He displayed by lowering his rate of speech. "Uh listen...when we talked the other day I remember you mentioned something about someone being a teacher?"

Jon at last found the list of names. His handwriting could be seen all over it; foot notes for future reference. And there, on the last page no less, was a name circled with the phrase: "School teacher," written next to it.

"AH! Yeah right here," Jon said pointing to the paper. "This...Ms. Cheerilee...she's a teacher isn't she?"

"Indeed she is," Celestia answered. "Might I ask why you wish to know?"

"Um, yeah of course," He said gathering his thoughts and catching his breath. "I would like to have her on my show...like tomorrow."

"Oh dear," she said. "And here I thought you've been trying to avoid the last minute requests." Celestia was right. Jon wanted to get out of the habit of asking people the day before if they wanted to appear on his show. He wanted to have a more concrete schedule for days at a time but this was different.

"I know, I know but something...sorta came up." Jon said pausing as he was once again reminded of his mother. "Look Celestia...I don't know if its the same for you guys but over here in the states teachers are constantly undermined by the media and they're plights are never recognized."

"That's so awful to hear," Celestia said with a level of concern only she could express for something that didn't concern her. "But if I may be so bold...what does this have to do with our Ms. Cheerilee?" To Jon it meant everything.

"Look if your education system is anything like ours than this Ms. Cheerilee is probably as ignored and neglected by the community as our teachers." Jon said, who almost ended his last statement with 'my mother.' "So I wish to interview her and in doing so give her the attention I'm sure she deserves."

"Well, while I am glad to hear of your admirable intentions allow me to put your mind at ease," She said in a comforting manner. "Nopony in Ponyville is nothing short of an important asset to the community. Everypony here treats each other with the utmost respect, I can assure you."

"While that may be true for Equestria," Jon replied in a serious tone. "I"m afraid it's an entirely different case here in America. Look...you're probably right, but the thing is...I think people here in our world can really benefit from an interview like this. If your citizens, and by extension this teacher, are as well off as you say they are then I'm sure the public should see what life is like on the other side. Maybe then they can start thinking about...oh I don't know...reform in our world."

Celestia didn't say anything. She was stunned at how this mere mortal could show such compassion for others around him. Here he had the resources to interview any number of mythical creatures to further is own career and yet he uses the opportunity in the hopes of better the lives of others.

"Besides," Jon continued, "I still say this Ms. Cheerilee could stand to have a little more exposure. You may disagree with me but I'm guessing there's a reason her name is located almost at the very end of the list while others get theirs on the front and in bold. This Celestia could not deny.

"Well Jon I must say I am impressed." She said, her respect for him now at an all new high. "You may be from New York but if I didn't know any better I'd swear you were a member of Ponyville." Jon couldn't help but smile.

"Thanks Celestia," Jon said rubbing the back of his head. "Buuut I'm afraid I like having fingers too much." After a short giggle and pause Celestia gave Jon two options on what would happen next.

"So...shall I send a royal letter or would you rather I teleport you to her?" She asked. Jon almost answered the question right away but before he did a thought manifested inside his head. He quickly turned his head to a nearby mirror catching a glimpse of the somewhat elegant suite he wore for the dinner he just had with his mother (Something which she insisted he didn't have to do). It was certainly an acceptable attire one could wear in a variety of public places but he couldn't help but remind himself of his last, unpleasant, visit to Equestria.

"Your not sending me to a farm again, are you?" Jon asked rubbing his stomach, sounding a little on the annoyed side.

"No, I assure this place will be quite more accepting of whatever you decide to wear." She said sounding apologetic. "It'll also be a lot more...let's say hospitable as well."

"Well alright then." Jon said clapping his hands in anticipation. "Beam me down Scottie!"

Jon now more used to this than before stood up and closed his eyes immediately, waiting for the princess to conjure her magic. With a quick burst of light Jon was now in a new location altogether. Usually Jon would have time to slowly open his eyes and, at his own pace, deduce for himself where he was. But the sound of many voices collectively gasping forced him to open his eyes and quickly realize where he was.

It was bright outside so Jon could see clearly without any help. He was in a large room only somewhat bigger than his study, with many more windows. All around him were pictures that looked like they'd been drawn by a child...it looked like that because that was indeed the case. Sitting right In front him were over a dozen pair of eyes, each belonging to a young filly or colt; each wide in astonishment and each of them staring directly at Jon with their mouths agape. Celestia had teleported him in the middle of a classroom.

Jon was used to being in front of crowds; It was his world and it's how he started his career but this was different. Being in front of a group of children was not his usual forte. He was reminded of a story his good friend Zach Galifianakis told him awhile back about how he had do standup for a bunch of children only to run out of material before it was over...Jon now knew the feeling.

The collection of children, Jon noted, varied in appearance from pony to pony. Some were bigger than others while some had vastly different color schemes. He had never seen so many ponies in one spot before. The majority of the students were fillys and all of them were an almost even collection of Unicorn, Pegasus, and Earthpony...one whom Jon actually recognized.

"HEY JOHNNY!" A student sitting up front said, breaking the silence and earning her the attention of the rest of the class. Jon recognized that giant pink bow anywhere. It was Applejack's kid sister; Applebloom.

"Fancy meetin' you here!" She said. "Are ya back again to-"

Before she could finish a voice coming from behind Jon cut her off and immediately got the attention of the class...mostly.

"Excuse me sir but we are in the middle of class time!" The voice said. Whoever it was she sounded much older than the majority of ponies present, and her tone of voice carried with it much authority. Jon turned around to see a purple colored Earthpony glaring at him looking rather perturbed. Her mane was light purple with streaks of pale, light gray rose and her cutie mark depicted three smiling sunflowers.

"Who are you!" The purple pony said. "Or for that matter...what are you?" Before Jon could answer Applebloom sprung from her seat and dashed in front of him, almost as if she was about to take a bullet.

"Wait Ms. Cheerilee!" Applebloom pleaded. "This is Johnny! He's a human! Please don't hurt him, he's real friendly like!" Jon was grateful for young Appleboom vouching of him, though he was pretty sure he wasn't in any real danger. The only thing on his mind was what she had just said. That his Purple Earthpony standing before him was his target. The school teacher, Ms. Cheerilee!

"Wait...'Johnny?'" Cheerilee said with a sudden sense of realization. "And he's human." She was starting to put two and two together and at that moment she recognized his face. She now knew who he was.

"Actually its Jon...Jon Stewart," He said, now spinning back to Applebloom. "Uh listen sweety, I need to have word with your teacher. So why don't you be a good girl and get back to your seat while the adults talk in private."

Usually Applebloom would have objected to being talked down to and insisted she listen in but she was quite fond of Jon so she obeyed and went back to her seat, where she was greeted by her fellow classmates whispering questions at her.

With his identify now cleared up Jon was free to talk with his potential guest. He made his away around her desk where he greeted her with a handshake and kneeled down so she could hear him.

"Hello Ms Cheerilee," Jon said, in a low voice. "Like I said my name is Jon Stewart. I'm the host of 'The Daily Show.' I don't know if you've ever heard of it."

"O-oh well I- That is to say yes...yes I have heard of it." She said still slightly in shock. She wasn't used to a celebrity from another world being present in her classroom. "Some of my best friends are real big fans of yours...but listen I am in the middle of something here so...can I ask what are you doing here?"

"Oh certainly!" Jon said, feeling guilty that he interrupted what appeared to be a lecture. "Well, I'm here because I was wondering if you would be willing to appear on my show?" This sudden news surprised Cheerilee greatly. She was certain that he had appeared in her class completely by accident or that he was lost. The thought hadn't occurred to her that he was scouting for talent, and she definitely didn't think for even a second that he was here for her.

"You want to what!" She exclaimed. Her sudden outburst caused her students to look up at her; she covered her mouth and motioned for them to go back to what they were doing. After lowering her voice she began speaking with Jon again. "I'm sorry but you want me on your show...ME?!"

"Yeah!" Jon said encouragingly, while still as a whisper. "I think it would be a great opportunity if I interviewed someone like you."

"Som-Someone like me?" She pondered out loud. "What do you mean by that? I mean...why me?"

"What I mean is you're a teacher right? So I believe that if someone in your position were to be interviewed on my show it would be a great segment for my viewers. 'Must-see-T.V.' if you will." Jon said doing his best to convince the unsure pony.

"Oooh I...I don't know" Cheerilee said, trying her best to not look rustled. "I mean...wh-when would you even want on your show?"

"Uh...oh about sometime tomorrow." Jon said with a guilty look on his face.

"TOMORROW!?" She shouted, this time permanently gaining the attention of her students. Noticing this she quickly turned to address her class. "Now, now students nothing to worry about. Please continue reading from your books." None of them did.

"I can't just leave my class tomorrow!" She said, whispering so loud the class heard her.

"Can yo-- Is there any chance you can get someone to sub for you?" Jon asked, hoping he wasn't coming off too pushy.

"Well I mean, I suppose I could get twilight to- I mean no!...I...I'm sorry Mr. Stewart but I don't think I can appear on your show." She said shaking her head.

"OK I'm gonna level with you," Jon said seriously. "I feel that if I have influential people on my show real change can be made in my world...and I feel that change can start with us." Cheerilee didn't quite know how to respond.

"But...but then why are you asking me," She said looking confused. "I'm sure you can find somepony more important than me to go on your show...I mean I'm just a teacher."

The phrase "just a teacher" didn't register with Jon's brain. What got to him the most was that it wasn't said by some out of touch politician on capital hill but from an actual teacher. It was that kind of mentality that inspired Jon to ask her in the first place; now more than ever he needed her on his show. Jon had no choice...it was time to play dirty.

"I'm so sorry for what I'm about to do." Jon said with a sigh. Before Cheerilee could respond Jon had already stood up and faced the class. She may have been their teacher and they her students but the ponies present in the class was still an audience. And Jon, being the renowned comedian of many years, knew exactly how to talk to an audience.

"Hey Kids!" Jon said with overacting enthusiasm. "My name is Jon Stewart and I host a show called 'The Daily Show!' Who here knows about that show?" A surprising amount of students raised their hooves.

"Well alright! So kids tell me..." Jon said, sliding to the side and extending his arms out at Cheerilee as if she was a new model car at an auto show. "...who here wants to see their teacher, Ms. Cheerilee, on T.V.!?"

Jon's question was met with every child's eyes as wide as the moon, and their faces glowing with excitement. Her fate was sealed.

Episode 4 [Ms. Cheerilee]: Please welcome to the show Ms. Cheerilee

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Ms. Cheerilee (Cheerilee)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

With the the last commercial just finishing up the camera made its way down the center of the stage to get a good view of Jon Stewart who could be seen pretending to read from his notes in an overly dedicated manner. As the roar of the crowd continued Jon found himself now looking at the camera making body gestures as if he's not quite sure where he is only to "realize" he's on air and begins to speak.

"Welcome back to the show, my quest tonight;" Jon said pointing to the camera. "She is a beloved citizen of Ponyville and a teacher at Ponyville Elementary School. Please welcome to the show, Ms. Cheerilee!

As the crowd cheers for their guest to reveal herself the camera switches positions to view the backstage at an angle in anticipation for the Earthpony's arrival. Finally, after short wait, Ms. Cheerilee emerges from backstage which causes the cheers of the crowd to increase with excitement. Jon, as well at others in attendance, noticed that it took a little bit longer than usual for the guest to emerge from backstage. This was simply because she took an extra few seconds to make sure she looked alright.

Jon lightly jogged over to greet his guest halfway on the stage, where he shook her hoof and guided her back to the desk. Upon their arrival Jon offered her a seat by manually lowering the guest chair so she could easily get one. A gesture which she seemed to be very appreciative of as she jumped on and thanked him with a smile. Jon adjusted her chair up a bit but not before giving her one last shake of the hoof. Jon, now back in his seat, sits and waits for the crowd to stop cheering before beginning the interview. An interview he was really looking forward to.

"Welcome to the show Ms. Cheerilee, it's great to have you here," Jon said extending his arms out.

"Thank you very much for having me...though I didn't have much choice in the matter now did I?" She said with a smile, not showing a hint of animosity or scorn.

"I...I have no idea what you're talking about." He replied, pulling his collar as if to let out some pent up steam.

"I think you do Mr. Stewart." Cheerilee said, giving Jon the same look she'd give a student who was misbehaving. "You basically turned my class against me in order to get to get me on your show."

"I did no such thing!" He said throwing up a lone finger, looking as though he was making a declaration.

"But don't worry Mr. Stewart...I'll remember this the next time your in Ponyville." She said placing a hoof on Jon's hand. Her 'threat' was made all the more unnerving by her giving him a friendly wink and smile.

"...SO! Your a teacher!" Jon said, in a comically transparent attempt to change the subject. Both Cheerilee and the audience laughed as Jon slowly took back his hand from the clutches of his guest. Before She could answer Jon spoke again.

"Oh and sorry again for interrupting your class." Jon continued now looking at the audience. "Oh yeah, for those those at home who don't know I sort of got teleported in the middle of her class while she was teaching some kids or whatever-- eh it's no big deal."

"It's quite alright Mr. Stewart." Cheerilee said. "I must admit you made quite an impression on my class. They, like most ponies in Equestria, have never seen a human before. So to see you appear out of no where and sweep me away really got their imaginations going."

"You know I've been wondering something." Jon interjected. "You uh-- you yourself say most people in Equestria have never seen a human before...but for one to appear in your classroom like I did...I'm amazed you kept your composure the way you did."

"Well I didn't think--" Cheerilee said before getting interupted.

"I mean you didn't even call the Pony Police on me or anythying," Jon said.

"Well Jon," She said clearing her throat. "The reason why I didn't panic is because...well as you know I am a teacher; my students look up to me and It is my job to always make sure I act appropriately in their presence. If I did panic or get scared at your sudden arrival then I would have run the risk of having my students do the same, and as their teacher I could not allow that. I had to act brave and in charge for them."

"Wow...well I must say that is very chivalrous and responsible of you. Had it been me I probably would have just used one of the kids as a distraction and head for the hills." Jon said sounding uncomfortably genuine to his guest. Cheerilee wasn't by any means a comedian but nevertheless she wanted to see if she could match wits with Jon.

"Besides that...another reason why I didn't panic is because in truth you don't look that dangerous or intimidating," She said, causing the audience to laugh at Jon. "I figured worse case scenario I probably could have handled the situation myself."

"So your saying you could've taken me?" Jon retorted, standing up briefly to display his height. "Because I'm like twice your size...you don't even know what I can do!"

"Well that may be true," Cheerilee responded quickly pointing to Jon's midsection. "But if I recall the last time you had a run in with an Earthpony it didn't turn out so well in your favor." The sound of laughter and eventually cheers prevented Jon from responding right away. He didn't show signs of waver from her last statement but he couldn't help but feel somewhat disappointed in himself for walking so easily into it.

"...Touche'," Jon said, lifting his mug to Cheerilee and rubbing his stomach. He took a sip and was about to say something but before he did he turned to camera once more.

"Oh and Applejack if your watching this: Round two is next week!" He yelled while standing up and flexing. "I'll meet you outback in the church parking lot!" Cheerilee wanted to comment on how Jon's goofy disposition proved her point on how he wasn't much of a threat but couldn't as she was too busy laughing at his performance.

"You know...when last I saw you, prior to this interview" Jon continued. "Your students seemed very happy about you going on this show. Tell me are...are any of them watching the program right now?" Cheerilee, still laughing, gave a worried look at the thought.

"Well, I certainly hope not. I mean nothing against your show, its great, but I don't think it's appropriate for younger ponies." She said. "Although I hear some of the adults are letting them watch this segment just this once... so long as you tone down the dirty words." Jon was about to respond by swearing purposely but decided against it.

"I see. So did any of your students do anything special for this occasion before you left?" Jon asked while fiddling with his pen.

"Actually yes they did!" Cheerilee said with a look of delight across her face. "They actually got together this morning in front of the schoolhouse to wish me luck before I left. They even pulled their allowances together to get me this!" Cheerilee reached down and picked up a small camera with her mouth and placed it on the table. Jon wasn't very knowledgeable about photography but even he could see that it wasn't that impressive. It was no where near good enough to be called a "professional camera" but at the same time it wasn't cheap.

"They want me to take pictures while I'm here and show it to them later," She continued, holding the camera in her hooves. "When I get back I'll have the photos developed in the school's basement and present it to them as a lecture on Human life. Which reminds me...smile!" With that she took a picture of Jon, momentarily blinding him with a flash.

"Wow..." Jon said rubbing his eyes. "Leave it to a teacher to take something as simple as a gift from her students and turn it into homework." Cheerilee found Jon's observation to be both humorous and slightly accurate; deciding there to just show it them as in class slideshow for fun.

"Now obviously your students are exited for you to be here tonight...but what about you Ms. Cheerilee?" Jon asked leaning forward. "You-- how are you liking your stay in New York so far?"

"Well all things considered I'd by lying if I said I wasn't excited to be here today," Cheerilee said with a giggle. "I don't leave Ponyville much because of my responsibilities to my students. Plus I love going to new places and learning new things. I must admit I never thought I'd get the chance to visit another world. And of course my students really wanted me to go so I didn't want to disappoint them...though a part of me feels they only wanted me to go cause they now get a substitute teacher."

"That's right you had someone fill in for you while you were away," Jon interjeted. "If I recall you...you had gotten Twilight Sparkle to fill in for you."

"That is correct Jon. She once told that if I ever needed her to she would gladly watch the class for me." She replied. "Shes probably the smartest pony we have in Ponyville so I'm sure she'll do a good job...though I am a little worried. My students can be a real handful sometimes."

"Aaah I get ya," Jon responded, nodding his head. "I remember when I was in their age me and my friends were always pulling pranks on our homeroom teacher. I'm guessing it's the same to you?"

"Well, I guess you can say that," Cheerilee said. "There have been the occasional prank or two."

"Like what?" Jon asked, wondering if pony pranks were anything like human ones. "Giv-give us an example."

"Well...there was this one time where the kids switched my sugar with salt an-- oh wait no, that Pinkie Pie..." She said rubbing her head. "Oh no wait I remember one: This one time somepony switched the signs on the "Filly" and "Colt" bathroom doors and I- oh wait that was also Pinkie Pie. Ok well uh, just the other day the town's drinking water...no that, that was Pinkie Pie too. Lets see, that was Pinkie Pie...that was Pinkie Pie...that was also Pinkie Pie..."

Jon watched as Cheerilee tried and failed to remember a single Prank that was pulled on her that didn't involve Pinkie Pie. It was a lot harder than she thought.

"Sorry Mr. Stewart," She said looking defeated. "It's hard thinking of a Prank that was pulled around town without thinking of her...she sorta does most of them."

"Ya don't saaaay?" Jon exclaimed giving her a look.

"OH! I just thought of one!" Cheerilee said. "And this one doesn't involve Pinkie Pie!"

"OK!" Jon said pretending to stretch. "Lay it on me!"

"Well I'm not sure if this counts as a prank but this one time During Hearts and Hooves day some of my students went and created a love potion," She said gaining the attention of everyone listening. "And while their hearts were in the right place they used it on me to try and get me a date. Turns out it was actually a love poison, and as a result me and a stallion by the name of Big Macintosh ended up falling in love with each other against our will." Jon was at a lost of words while the audience just laughed at the now blushing Earthpony.

"Why...I mean, whatever happened to simply putting a frog in the teachers top drawer?" Jon said in comical frustration. "Nowadays the kids have to invent new ways to alter with a teachers sense of reality."

"Oh it wasn't so bad," She insisted. "In the end they broke the spell and I forgave them."

"There are...so many questions I could ask about-- I mean for starters who gave them the idea to make that?" Jon asked.

"They actually got the idea from an old fairy tale book." She answered.

"Lesson learned! Kids! Don't read books!" Jon said whipping his hands. He waited for his guest to stop laughing before continuing. "Ok, so wh-where did they these kids get that book?"

"Oh well they got it from...Twilight Sparkle." Cheerilee said, raising her head in realization.

"Twilight Sparkle?" Jon asked. "You meeeean the same Twilight Sparkle...who is currently watching over your class?"

"Oh dear." She said, rubbing the back of her head. "I may not have thought that one all the way through."

"Ahem! Well I hope you have tenure." Jon said shuffling through his notes. "Also before we move one...you dated Big Macintosh?"

"I suppose I did," Cheerilee answered, still blushing. "He even had some corny pet names for me. At one point we even talked about getting married" Jon could almost count the seconds exactly for the audience to respond with an "Aaaawww."

"Wait, wait, wait...are you telling me that Big Macintosh actually said more than two words to you that wasn't 'nope' or 'yep?'" Jon asked, getting a nod in return. "Wow...he really must have been in love you."

Everyone in attendance understood the reference, and all shared a good bout of laughter as a result.

Jon always tried to avoid asking the most obvious questions, at least till the end, but this was one he couldn't avoid for much longer.

"So, Ms. Cheerilee, when did you first discover you wanted to be a teacher?" Jon asked, genuinely curious. The question caused her to tilt her head upwards as if to reminisce.

"Oh many years ago, Mr Stewart. I first discovered my love of teaching when I was younger, around the age of my students. And then one day I woke up and discovered this cutie mark," She said lifting her flank slightly so the people could get a view. "It represents the joy I feel whenever I cause somepony to bloom with knowledge! And ever since that day I knew I was meant to be a teacher!"

Her answer though very touching left Jon and subsequently almost everyone watching the program in a state of confusion. He took his pen out of his mouth and began tapping it against his desk, lost in thought.

"I'm sorry but...uh, 'cutie marks?'" Jon asked, looking around as if the answer was lying on the ground somewhere.

"That's right...Oh my," Cheerilee responded, noticing how lost he looked. "You don't know about cutie marks?"

"No. Can't say I do, talking purple pony from another world." Jon said, reminded her of the situation. With a quick laugh and a gleam in her eyes Cheerilee turned slightly to the audience and responded as if she was teaching a classroom.

"Well then allow me to tell you! You see back back in my world we ponies have a thing called 'cutie marks,'" She said once again raising her flank. "Now, as you can see a cutie mark is a symbol located on a ponies flank. It's a visual representation of a pony's special talent and in most cases what their profession is. Most ponies get them at a very young age once they themselves discover what it is that makes them unique. Everypony get's one eventually, its our right of passage as we grow up."

Jon found this to be interesting and at the same time hard to believe. Before asking his next question he tried to recall the cutie marks of his all the ponies he'd met at that point, though Applejack's was the only one we could remember for obvious reasons. He had certainly noticed that they had them but up until now he just assumed they were some sort of trendy fashion statement.

"So you're telling me that all ponies...eventually get this 'cutie mark' on their upper hips and it supposed to represent their career path?" Jon asked, raising one eyebrow.

"That's one way of putting it, yes!" Cheerilee stated, feeling happy she got to teach him something. "You humans don't have anything like that here in your world?"

"Not really," Jon said, sitting up in his seat. "The only thing even remotely resembling that here are things called 'tramp stamps' that some women get, and trust me when I say you don't wanna know what their special talent is." The crowd laughed at Jon's joke but Cheerilee was still focused on Jon, as this was her first time learning about human culture.

"I see. Well if you humans don't get cutie marks how do you know what your special talents are?" She asked. The question posed to Jon wasn't as easy to answer as he thought."

"Well..." he said, thinking carefully about the question. "To put it simply some of us just know. Others unfortunately go through most of their lives unsure of what their meant to do."

"That's sounds awful." She said.

"Yeah but in most cases, myself included, they have a dedicated role model to help guide them along the path of uncertainty," Jon said, sincerely. "You know, someone like you." His left field compliment caused Cheerilee to blush somewhat.

"Why thank you, Mr. Stewart!" She said. "So tell me, what's your special talent?" He didn't even have to think of how to respond to that.

"Being Jewish." He answered strait faced. Again her love of learning new things distracted Cheerilee from the sound of immense laughter coming from the audience.

"Very interesting. And when did you first discover your talent for being Jewish?" She asked.

"Well according to my mom i-it right around my circumcisions." He responded.

"And what exactly is a 'circumcision?'" Cheerilee asked rubbing her hoof against her chin.

"Well its a Jewish right of passage, much like you getting your cutie mark," Jon answered, determined to ride this joke straight to hell. "Only instead of gaining an ass tattoo I lost my forsk-- BUT that's neither here or there."

Jon now felt that needed to ask some serious questions while he could before her time on air ran out.

"So riddle me this, Ms. Cheerilee. You say that most ponies get their cutie mark when their around the age of of your students." He said. "So do you ever get a student or two who, for lack of a better term, 'freak out' over not getting the-- their cutie mark?" It was a perfectly valid question but nevertheless it caused Cheerilee to almost fall out of her chair laughing.

"Oh...oh Mr. Stewart!" She said, holding her sides. "Y-y-you have NO idea!" Jon had no way of knowing it at the time but somewhere in Ponyville at that very moment a certain young earthpony, and her two friends, were getting lovingly hazed.

In the interest of time Jon decided not to venture further into the subject even thought he very much wanted to.

"So tell me Ms. Cheerilee," Jon said scooting himself closer to his guest. "Well first let me start by saying that here in our country we're going through something of a debt crisis; unfortunately certain sectors of civil jobs have been cut financially as a result."

"Oh dear! Well that does sound serious." She said, holding a hoof to her mouth.

"Indeed it is," Jon responded. "Which is why I'm wondering, when was the last time budget cuts were levied at your level of teaching?" The question seemed to confused her.

"Budget cuts?" She said, looking as if Jon was speaking in foreign tongue. "You mean when funding is taken away from the school?"

"Yes exactly," Jon answered. "When was the last time it happened to you-- oh and how did you handle it." Cheerilee still looked confused, so she responded delicately as if saying the wrong thing could get her catapulted from her seat at any moment.

"Well Mr. Stewart..." She said. "I'm fortunate enough never have experience such a thing. The truth of the matter is in Equestria we don't take funding away from education...ever." The answer got Jon's immediate attention as well at the attention from millions around the world.

"Excuse me?" Jon said in shock. "Ever?"

"That's right," Cheerilee said surprised by Jon's being surprised. "Why in the name of Celestia would anypony cut funding to education? It's an institute designed to nurture and advance the minds of our children, that kind of service should be cherished above all things."

Her logic made a lot of sense to Jon yet at the same time he couldn't help but think of how impossible it seemed.

"If-- I mean if there's never any cuts to education then one can assume you are pretty well off," Jon said hoping not to offend. "Do you ever...think about retiring?"

"Well it's funny you should mention that," Cheerilee said. "I can actually retire right now if I wanted to. I come from somewhat wealthy family who guarantees that I could retire and go live with them."

"Then why don't you?" Jon asked almost knowing exactly what her answer would be.

"Well because Mr. Stewart," She said, pausing to gather her thoughts. "I love my job. I love the look on a child's face when they learn something new, I love telling parents that their child is doing well in my class, I love seeing students leave the classroom with more knowledge than when they entered, but most of all I love the feeling of knowing I'm helping mold the minds of future generations."

Jon didn't say a word. He just sat there and marveled at how much this stranger reminded him so much of his own mother.

"I mean, all this talk about education being cut and why teach in the in the first place just seems crazy to me," She continued with much fire in her heart. "If we don't care about the future of our children then they won't care enough to lead it."

There was a slight pause before the audience slowly then quickly began to applaud the Earthpony.

"You know what," Jon responded, nodding and giving a slow clap. "I couldn't agree more. But listen I'm sure you're more used to saying this than hearing it but would you mind staying after class for a few minutes to talk and we'll throw the rest up on the web?"

"Sure thing Mr. Stewart!" She said with a big smile. "Only if you agree to get a picture of me with your audience!"

"Done!" He said turning to the audience who was already cheering at the top of their lungs. "Ms. Cheerilee everyone! We'll be right back!"

The audience begins to stand and applaud as the camera shows Jon whispering something into Ms. Cheerilee's ear. The camera slowly paned away at a slightly different angle to see Cheerilee get up from her seat and pose in front of the audience as Jon snaps a quick picture. Soon the show fades into its next commercial.

Episode 5 [Octavia]: The Cellist

"Thank you for joining us. Here it is, your moment of zen!" By uttering these words Jon signals for his staff to play the last video clip before going off air. Another day another episode.

Jon could still hear the screams of his fans as he made his way backstage; weaving his way through a gauntlet of staff workers, occasionally receiving a thumbs up or someone saying "good job." After a few seconds of navigating Jon finally found his way to his office where he liked to go after each show to mentally unwind. His version of a cool down lap.

No sooner did he collapse in his hair did someone knock on his door and ask to come in. Usually no one would do such a thing as it was an unwritten rule that after a show no is to disturb Jon for awhile, but in this case Jon made an exception.

"Yes Selina; doors open." Jon yelled, sitting up in chair and buttoning up his coat to hid his protruding stomach.

A woman walked in wearing mostly black. Her dark brown hair held tightly back in a professional looking bun which complimented her glasses and Pantsuit. This was her usual ensemble with the only thing missing being her diamond necklace. The woman was Selina Jenson, the backstage manager and Jon's personal assistant.

"The show went very well today. The crowd especially took a liking to your Romney impersonation." She said, her gaze never leaving the clipboard she usually had with her.

"Thanks Selina," Jon responded as he took out his trusty list of names. "Could you please tell the tech guys to do something about the soundboard. The dramatic 'dun dun dun' sound effect came in kinda late."

"Of course, Sir." She said, still looking at her clipboard. "I'll make a note of that and have it fixed by tomorrow."

Jon was about tell her to call him 'Jon' instead of 'sir,' as it made him feel old. He didn't however as it would have been pointless; he'd asked her to do so many times before but she never did. It was just they was she was, always professional all the time. Jon didn't complain though, she was a great assistant. She was 20 years his junior and already she knew the ins and outs of the entertainment business almost as much as him.

As she jotted down anther note in on her clipboard she noticed the list of names on his desk. At first she thought nothing of it but her curiosity was peaked once she recognized a name or two.

"So that's the famous list I've heard so much about." She said. "Can I have a look?"

Jon, at the behest of Celestia (And even his own bosses) made sure to keep the details of how they did business a secret. Many people were trying to figure out how Jon was communicating with the people of Equestria in an attempt to do the same themselves. But in this case he figured letting his assistant look at the list was no big deal.

"No problem," Jon said, handing her the list. "I'll give you a five bucks if you can find a name that doesn't sound like a Crayon color." She looked at the list and read some of Jon's notes, which either described a pony or in some cases were reminders to get more information.

"So these are the people that everyone wants to get their hands on," she finally said, as she switched to another page. "It's incredible...an entirely different world out there at your fingertips."

"Your making it sound more extravagant than it actually is." Jon said.

"Am I?" Selina retorted. "Tell me, when was the last time someone else got the chance to interview a talking mythical creature of legend?"

Jon didn't answer, he instead just sat there massaging his head and did his best to not sound tired.

"I swear: Dragons, talking ponies, Pegasus...it's all so unreal." She said, putting the list back down. "So. Still not going to tell me how you manage to do all this?"

"Do what?" Jon said with a gin. "Manage an award winning show on television? I have this assistant who helps me. You should meet her, she's great. Knows how to brew up kick ass cup of coffee too." She didn't respond she just gave him a nod and began to walk out of the office.

"Who should I choose next?" Jon said. Selina stopped in her tracks halfway out the door and turned to Jon, her expression still the same.

"What do you mean sir?" She said.

"Common Selina you've worked here for almost 10 years," he said, picking up the list of names. "And in that time I've learned two things about you. One; you always have an opinion about something. And two; your opinion is usually right."

Jon placed the list of name on his desk facing Selina and sat up in his chair.

"You've seen the list and you've read my notes," Jon said, extending his hand. "If you're as good as an assistant as I think you are then you already know who should be on the show next...so who should I choose?"

With that Selina closed the door and made her way to Jon's desk. She flipped to one of the pages and extended her finger outward, placing her perfectly manicured nail on a name.

"Octavia. Next to her name you wrote 'Sophisticated musician,'" she said with a smile, turning around once again making her way for the exit. "....sometimes I feel that this show could use some class."

Later that day:

This time around Jon didn't head home at his usual time but instead stayed in his office a little longer. He was finishing up some paperwork but more important he stayed longer to make sure he was alone. After a few hours of paperwork he walked out of his office and into the area that had the other rooms and cubicles; he wanted to make sure no one else was around. The coast was clear.

Jon proceeded to pull out his phone and dial the number that he had dialed many times before; each time bringing something new and exiting his way.

"Hello Jon," Celestia said from the other line. "How can I help my favorite human today?"

"Well for starters you can tell who your second favorite human is," he responded. "I want to find him and rub it in his face."

"Oh my," Celestia said with a chuckle. "Someones in a good mood today."

"Eh what can I say," Jon said with a shrug. "I've gone the entire day without someone calling me an 'asshole' so I must be doing something right. But hey now that I have your attention...I was wondering if you could help me with out something."

"Certainly Jon." She said. "Is this regarding having someone on your show."

"Why yes It is! You just...you just get me." He said jokingly, walking up and down the now empty hallway. "I've decided who I want to appear on my show for tomorrow."

"That's great," She responded. "Just tell me who you wish interview and I'll have a talk with them."

"Thanks! The pony this time around is one, Octavia." Jon said taking a moment to reflect on how good and loyal a friend Celestia turned out to be. She was truly someone he could always count on for help.

"Oh...well I'm afraid I can't ask that particular pony." Celestia said. Jon took a moment to reflect on previous reflection.

"So when you say I'm your favorite human..." He said.

"Please hear me out," Celestia continued. "This particular pony is actually busy at the moment. I don't know if you recall but she is actually a well renowned musician in her field." Jon could vaguely remember a past conversation with Celestia in where she mentions a Pony who was a musician. Hence the phrase he put next to her name: 'Sophisticated musician.'

"You see the thing is at this moment she's in the middle of something important," she continued. "And I'm afraid it wouldn't be very proper of me to summon her right in the middle of personal affairs."

"Yeah I guess you're right." Jon said. He had to admit that what she was saying made sense; he wanted to have a noteworthy guest on his show but not if it meant inconveniencing them. Jon almost gave up on the idea but just as he did he realized that there was actually a second option.

"But hey what about this," He continued. "You can't pull her away at the moment and I understand that but...but what if you teleport me to her and I'll ask her myself after she's done with her whatever it is she's doing? That way I'll be sure to approach her when it's the most convenient, I'll get my guest, and you don't have to get your hooves dirty." Jon felt proud that he remembered to use the term 'hooves' instead of 'hands.'

"Well I don't see the harm in that," Celestia replied sounding amused. "Alright consider it done. If you have trouble finding her remember to look for a pink bow tie. Oh and one last thing. Don't be offended if she comes off as spiteful...deep down she's actually a very sweet pony."

Jon nodded and stood up readying himself for the incoming magic. He was still in the suit he wore that day so he didn't feel he needed a change of wardrobe, but at the same time he underestimated the exquisiteness of his soon to be location, as evident by him unwilling to pull back up his tie or button up his jacket.

"Alright!" Jon said. "I'm ready!"

Episode 5 [Octavia]: Jon goes to a concert

After closing his eyes and waiting a few seconds Jon could feel a change in atmosphere as he was slingshotted from his world to another. He still had his eyes closed but he could still sense that he was in a new location. The first thing that grabbed Jon's attention about his new settings was the difference in what he could hear. The silent ambiance of his deserted office was not replaced with the sound of muffled voices coming from somewhere nearby.

Jon opened his eyes to find himself inside an empty room with lockers on one side and mirrors on the other. On the floor was the occasional article of clothing or suitcase designed to hold whatever given item one might have. Jon had been a comedian for many years now and knew exactly what all this meant. He was in a dressing room.

Across from him he saw a door where the muffled voices could be heard. He was about to make his way there when he heard another sound, this time from behind him. He spun around only to realize that he actually wasn't alone.

Behind him in a chair was a blue stallion, with light blue hair, who was about half way dressed in a tuxedo. His cutie mark seemed to be music notes and his ever present horn was activated as he was trying to put away his violin. Jon couldn't help but notice the the ponies face which had an expression surprise and fear, but more importunately he noticed that pony was in fact male and bore no pink bow tie.

"Oh uh...sorry," Jon said making his way to the door. He was about to exit when he turned back for a second. "Oh and by the way...your fly is open." With that Jon was out of the room and into a crowded hallway leaving the terrified unicorn alone once again.

Jon now found himself in a new location, a narrow hallway crowded with all matter of ponies. Some looking like musicians and others looking like what appeared to be stagehands. Almost all at once the ponies stopped and gawked at Jon's towering presence; some dumbfounded by this strange species' sudden appearance and some even star stuck.

"Hey how you doing?" Jon said, waving his hand at the many eyes now fixated on him. With the sea of ponies coming to a standstill Jon could hear something in the distance. It was the sound of music.

"Excuse me." He said as he made his way down the hallway, following the music and capturing the attention of more ponies as he did.

As he progressed through room after room the music started to get louder and louder to the point where Jon could clearly identify that it was classical music. Usually someone would have stopped Jon from going any further as he was heading towards the main stage but in this case everyone present was too shocked to do anything about it.

Eventually he found his way to the source of the music. Jon was now just outside of what appeared to be the main stage of a music hall. In front of him were dozens of ponies, each wielding a different type of instrument and facing an audience of hundreds.

Unknown to Jon at the time Celestia had teleported him to the famed Canterlot Concert Hall located right under her castle. Even though it was a music hall it was located outside as opposed to inside a building. Columns supported the structure and the walls looked to be made of ivory and gold with the floor constructed of pure redwood (The entire hall itself was located at the edge of a forest. The same forest which was used to make said floors). In addition the stage itself was massive with the orchestra only filling up a small fraction of it, which to Jon meant it served multiple functions besides music concerts.

At the time of his visit Canterlot was having a concert in celebration of the annual Summer solstice. Anyone could attend, and its strategic location meant that anyone in the castle could hear its music.

"Wow. I guess she really was in the middle of something important." Jon thought as he buttoned up his jacket and straightened out his tie.

As Jon glanced over the ponies producing the lovely music he had a difficult time finding Octavia. It was dark outside but the expert lighting made it so you could see everyone on stage (Though the people in the audience were almost completely invisible to those on stage). What made it hard for Jon to locate her was the many unicorn horns that were alight with magic, each being used to control whatever given instrument was playing.

But one pony eventually stood out to Jon and for two main reason. For one she was located at the front of the orchestra almost to the point where it looked as if she was the main attraction. But what Jon found most interesting was, as far he could tell, she was the only Earthpony present as displayed by her playing a cello with her hooves.

As Jon continued to look onward at the gray Earthpony, with an even darker gray mane, he saw that this she also had around her neck a loose collar complete with a pink bow tie.

"Hey," Jon said, turning to an aging white unicorn who even Jon's presence couldn't tear his eyes from the performance. "That Gray pony upfront...is that Octavia?" The unicorn turned to Jon to give him a quizzical look then swiftly went back to watching the show.

"Yes, yes, yes," He said waving his hoof at Jon. "Now be quiet! The show, she is almost complete!"

Jon followed his orders and watched as the symphony neared it's completion. He had to admit going to Equestria on business had its perks. This being one of them.

The music he was listening to was probably the most hauntingly beautiful thing he's ever heard. Jon had a soft spots for the arts and had even watched the New York philharmonic Orchestra once or twice in his life but this...was something else.

A few minutes had passed and the final note was struck. Every pony in attendance stood up in applause as the musicians on stage took a bow. After awhile of cheering and applauding the orchestra split down the middle and began exiting the stage either to their left or right. Jon saw this and decided to head back in the hallway and wait for Octavia as to not cause a scene.

This proved to be only somewhat effective as one by one each pony stopped in their tracks at the eventual sight of Jon. This caused something of a traffic jam in that narrow hallway as no one dared to move any further. Like the hallway was a circulatory system and Jon had just caused an artery block to the heart.

Before anyone could say anything the crowd began to move aside as a lone figure began to walk through. It was Octavia who did not say a word, she just kept on walking. Eventually she made her way to the front of the crowd where Jon was. She briefly looked up at him and for a split second almost stopped in her tracks but then continued onward.

"Hi there," Jon said extending his hand. "I was wondering if I could have a moment of--"

Before Jon could finish his sentence Octavia walked passed him without even saying a single word, much to the surprise of her fellow musicians who at this point were already whispering rumors. Jon did not see that coming at all and for a brief moment just stood there hand outstretched.

Down but not out he turned around and did his best to follow her through the crowded hallway.

"Excuse me!" Jon shouted out, trying to get the attention of Octavia.

She was a few feet ahead and could easily hear him but chose not to respond. Her stride never broke as she effortlessly walked in and out of the incoming wave of ponies, occasionally receiving a fleeting compliment.

"Could I please have a moment of your time!?" Jon shouted once more, slowly closing the gap between them. Eventually Octavia made it to a room designated "Dressing Room." She opened the door and was about to enter when Jon finally caught up, making it that much more difficult to ignore him.

"Hey wait a second!" Jon said as he tried to catch his breath. "Hi...sorry but I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second? You may not know me but my name is--"

"Jon Stewart." Octavia said, her hoof still on the half opened door and her eyes looking forward.

Jon wasn't sure if her knowing of who he is was a good or bad thing.

"Yes, I am well fully aware of who you are. I hear you have a fondness of popping up in random places." She continued. "You've made quite an impact here in Equestria"

"Oh, well I suppose I have." He said, with an awkward smile. "If you've heard of me then I'm assuming you know about...what I do?"

"If you are referring to your television show then yes I am aware of your profession." Octavia said, continuing to avoid eye contact.

"Well then in that case I was wondering," Jon said with a pause. "Would you like to be interviewed on my show tomorrow?"

Octavia opened the door to the dressing room and walked halfway in placing her cello on the ground. She turned to face Jon and for the first time looked him in the eye.

"No." She said, closing the door in his face. Jon was at a loss for words.

"O-o-oh well I..." He said, raising his voice so she could hear him. "Well what about at a later time when you're not--"

The audible sound of Octavia locking the door cut Jon off mid sentence leaving him standing there alone.

"You sure do know how to pick em, Selina." Jon said to himself with a sigh.

Later that night:

Jon was now back home in his study calculating his next move. He could either call Celestia to try and get someone else on the show or use a back up filler in the mean time. Jon was determined however to get an Equestrian citizen to come on so he spent the better part of his night looking over the list of names again.

"Maybe this was a blessing in disguise." Jon thought to himself, feeling as though he dodged a bullet. "I mean she sure didn't seem like the life of the party. I can only imagine what she'd be like on national television."

Jon was no stranger to people refusing to come on his show so this wasn't that big a blow to his ego. In the past he's had both high and low profile figures reject his invitations, usually because of scheduling or a lack of interest. Though he had to admit getting reject in person didn't feel very good.

As Jon looked over the list again he picked up his phone, ready to call Celestia when something unexpected and frightening happened. Jon leaped from his chair with a look of shock on his face at the sight of green fire bursting in front of him. He held himself as the green flame vanished into thin air as quickly as it appeared, leaving behind only a single 8x11 note.

"Spike?" Jon thought to himself as he slowly approached his desk reaching out where the note now laid. Jon would have been more hesitant about this a few weeks ago but his time in Equestria almost made occurrences like this second nature to him. The note was addressed to him but didn't say who it was from, thought the way it was delivered and the hand writing suggested that Spike had sent it.

Jon opened the letter and began to read it:

"You got to be kidding me." Jon thought to himself.

At first Jon thought about rejecting her reconsideration and call Celestia to get someone else. The more he thought about it the more it seemed like a good idea, after all Jon was certain that someone like her wouldn't be a very likeable guest to have. He was about half way through dialing Celestia when he remembered what she had told him before...about how Octavia can seem off putting but was actually kindhearted.

Jon decided to let cooler head prevail as he put down the phone and made a mental note to call Selina and confirm the intended arrival of his new guest. As Jon made his way to his room to go to sleep a thought popped in his head.

What made Octavia change her mind?

It was something that Jon was determined to ask her himself tomorrow.

Episode 5 [Octavia]: Please welcome to the show Octavia

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Octavia
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

As one more commercial comes and goes the audience in attendance begin to cheer at the sight of the 'Daily Show logo' appearing on screen and vanishing. This signaled the shows return from it's last segment which ultimately meant it was time for Jon to conduct yet another interview.

The camera did its usual pan over to Jon who could be seen looking into the camera and swiveling back and forth in his chair. As the camera came in closer he began to wave at his audience before eventually looking back at the camera, ready to speak.

"Welcome back to 'The Daily Show', my guest tonight!" Jon said, cracking his neck. "She is a musician, whose achievements have made her renowned all over Equestria as one of the best cellist ever in her field. Please welcome to the show, Octavia!"

The crowd could hardly contain their excitement as the new Equestrian guest made her way on the stage. The last time Jon saw her was in the dark hallway of the Canterlot Concert Hall, so this was was his first time seeing her up close and in better lighting. It was at this point that he noticed for the first time her cutie mark, which was with a purple music note matching her eye color. This made sense to him as she was a musician.

As she made her way to the desk it looked as if she wasn't going to even look at the audience, who were cheering for her. Eventually, as she got closer to Jon, she acknowledged their existence by looking at them though she didn't wave or smile.

When she arrived at the desk Jon met her by shaking her hoof and offering her a seat which she gladly took, though it was hard to tell how appreciative she was towards the gesture.

Jon, now satisfied, sat in his chair and waited for the crowd's cheers to decrease in volume before starting. Before that happened however Jon was surprised to see a stagehand run up behind Octavia and place a new mug of water in front of her then dash off again backstage.

He would have asked what he was doing but he came and went too quickly and it would have been impossible for him to hear Jon over the roar of the crowd.

His curiously took a temporary back seat due to the crowd's cheering slowly coming to a stop.

"Welcome to the show Octavia great to have you here!" Jon said, adjusting himself in his chair.

"Thank you for having me Mr. Stewart," Octavia said. "It was most generous of you to ask me to attend." He actually got a thank you. Jon wondered if this was the same Octavia from last night.

"It's no problem at all, and please call me 'Jon,'" He said. "Now whats...whats interesting is that you almost--"

Jon stopped mid sentence to see Octavia reach below her and grab something delicately in her hoof. It was a tea bag which she suspended over her mug of water. Jon now understood what the stagehand had given her. She requested hot water.

Before she could submerge the pouch of tea-leaves in her drink she noticed Jon looking at her.

"Oh. Do you mind?" She asked.

"Not at all." Jon said, motioning for her to continue. He could already tell this interview would be different.

"So as I was saying," Jon continued. "What's interesting is that you almost didn't...appear on today's show. You had originally uh-- rejected my offer."

"That is correct." Octavia said, but not before once again dipping the tea bag in her mug.

"So I guess what I'm asking is...wha--why did you decide to come on the show after all?" Jon asked, his question hanging in the air for a second. His inquiry seemed to have resonated with Octavia as her attention was torn away from her tea to Jon. This didn't last long as she once again focused on her beverage.

"Let's just say I had a change of heart." She said, taking a sip of her now ready tea.

"Oh I see." Jon said tapping his pen against his desk, not believing a word of it. He didn't want to press the issue to much so he let it slide making a mental note to come back to it later.

"Well either way I'm glad you could make it!" Jon said sincerely. "And hey! Now you get to see me in my natural habitat."

"I suppose that's true." Octavia said, taking another sip of her tea.

"Yeah for those of you who don't know, when I uh-- When I first approached Octavia here she was in the middle of a symphony." Jon said leaning towards the camera and then back to Octavia. "And may I just say this: That was without a doubt the best performance I had ever seen. You were great!"

Usually she would have thought the compliment was just a hollow attempt to butter her up. But as Octavia looked up from her drink into Jon's eyes she could see that his words were authentic.

"Oh well...thank you very much." She said, nervously brushing back her chair. "I rather appreciate hearing that. Oh and...I apologize for acting so cold towards the last time we exchanged words."

"Ah fogettaboutit!" Jon said, waving his hand in a dismissive gesture. "Trust me as a comedian in New York I've experienced worse rejections." Octavia was now paying more attention to Jon.

"Thank you for understanding," She said. "It's just that I don't like being bothered right after a major performance. I'm sure someone like you could understand that." Jon knew all to well what she was saying.

"And hey, at least I didn't get teleported to uh-- right in the middle of the stage." Jon added. The thought of this happening caused Octavia to cringe in her place. She took a sip of her tea to help remedy the feeling.

"I suppose if that were to happen you would have asked the audience in attendance if they wanted to see me on T.V. like you did with dear Ms. Cheerilee." She said, looking at Jon was serious eyes.

Jon was surprised; he was not expecting her to make references to previous shows of his.

"Oh well, well, well." Jon said, stroking his chin. "If I didn't know any better I would say it sounded as if you're a fan of the show."

Octavia was about to take another drink when the question stopped her mid sip.

"Well if you must know," She said, putting down her drink. "I am somewhat familiar with your show--"

"Oh really." Jon interrupted, his eyes now widened. "So you do watch the show?"

"No I'm afraid I don't. I'm just familiar with how it works." Octavia said, causing Jon to jokingly put his closed fist to his chest as if he was stabbed in the heart.

"Like I said before, a lot of people in Equestria know of you," she continued. "And as such I know how you conduct yourself on this show. This is actually one of the reasons why I refused to attend at first."

"What do you mean?" Jon asked, wondering if he was finally going to get her to open up more.

"Well its like this Mr. Stewart. I know that you and your correspondence have a real talent for inviting people on the program and making them look like fools." Octavia answered, while the audience gave a slight chuckle. "Say for example one your colleagues got the chance to interview a politician, or celebrity...they would know exactly what to say to make them sound like simpletons."

"What can I say." Jon said with a proud shrug. "They were taught by the best."

"Exactly my point." Octavia continued, sounding defensive. "And from what I understand you yourself enjoy a good fond ribbing of your guests as well. Now, I understand you do so playfully and with no ill tidings but you'll forgive me if I wasn't entirety thrilled with the idea of being mocked on television."

Jon was beginning to understand Octavia a little bit more.

"Well...i-if it'll make you feel better how bout I promise not not make any jokes at your expense?" Jon asked, extending his hand.

Octavia wanted to respond indifferently towards his proposal but in truth she was very thankful for his willingness to compromise with her. Though she tried her hardest to not telegraph these feelings.

"I...I would appreciate that." She said, shaking his hand and effortlessly holding back a smile.

"Well alright then!" Jon said with a smile as picked up his notes. "No cheap shots."

Jon waited a few seconds before taking the top three pages of his notes and crumpling them up. He then proceeded to throw them over his shoulder with a look of fake disappointment. This caused the audience to laugh hysterically and while Octavia herself found it humorous she wondered if perhaps those really were jokes aimed at her.

"Were those really all jokes about me?" She asked.

"So-- oh no I mostly just play hangman on those things." He responded.

Octavia still couldn't tell how genuine Jon was being.

"So Octavia," Jon continued. "You are a musician back in Equestria, am I right?"

"Indeed you are Mr. Stewart," she answered. "I am a cellist for the Royal Canterlot Symphony."

"Now...your not just any cellist, you have quite an impressive resume." He said looking over his notes very briefly. "According to my research: You graduated top of your class at the Canterlot University of music, you were hand picked by Celestia to be the first-chair cellist for the Royal Canterlot Symphony, you're the youngest pony to ever win the Equestrian peace price in the art of music, and the only pony to ever be a member of both the Royal Symphony and Canterlot philharmonic orchestra at the same time. Now--"

Before Jon could go any further he was cut off by the sound of the audience applauding at Octavia. She didn't respond to them as she was very much used to hearing this sound.

"Now I gotta say that is all very, very impressive." Jon said. Octavia took this time to take another sip of her tea.

"Thank you Mr. Stewart," She responded. "I suppose it is but I can always do better." Jon couldn't help but laugh at her tone.

"So you spend most of your time in Canterlot then?" Jon asked

"Well yes I do," she answered. "Although I do travel a lot to attend performances but for the most part...yes I primarily conduct myself within the walls of Canterlot."

"So what's it like living in a city like Canterlot?" Jon asked. "Do you feel that the environment...helps you fulfill yourself artistically?" Octavia took a moment to respond as she was in the middle of swallowing down a gulp of tea.

"I actually don't live in Canterlot," she answered. "It's too expensive to live in the city so I commute there from Ponyville."

"Oh I had no idea." Jon retorted

"Yes, the rent there is much less expensive," she added. "Especially when you have someone who helps you out." Jon understood what she meant but for some reason thought it'd be good to press the issue a little bit further.

"Oh so you live with someone?" Jon asked. Octavia took a moment to respond. She was clearly thinking of what to say next.

"Yes...yes I do," She replied. "A roommate as a matter a fact, we split the rent evenly between us"

"Is this roommate of yours also a musician? He continued.

"You could say that," Octavia said quietly. "She does her own thing and I do mine."

Jon couldn't help but feel she was avoiding the question somewhat but in the end decided to steer the interview in a new direction.

"So what inspired you to be a musician?" Jon asked, "Was it listening to the famous works of artists like...uh, Beethoven, Mozart, or Bach? Or ya know, something like that?" Octavia was about to answer but before she could she felt lost over something he had just said.

"I'm sorry Mr. Stewart," she said, looking skeptical. "But I'm afraid I haven't the faintest idea who those people are." Jon shook is head as if to try and clear his thoughts.

"Really!?" He said. "You've never heard of them?"

Jon knew that her being from a different world would bring with it a certain degree of ignorance but a classical musician now knowing about someone like Beethoven just seemed inconceivable.

"No. But I can infer that they, much like myself, are musicians in the art of classical music." She said, once again picking up her cup of tea.

"Yes, yes they are and-- you know my personal assistant thought something like this might, actually." Jon said, pointing a finger backstage. "So having said that...Octavia would you consider participating in a little experiment with me?"

She was about to take another drink but stopped mid sip to look up at Jon.

"What kind of experiment?" She asked.

"Ok, basically Its like this," Jon said. "I'll have my team backstage play some songs over the speakers. And you, being the gifted musician that you are, will give us your opinion on what you think of them. What do ya say?"

Octavia took a moment to think about it. She looked over at the audience who were cheering her on to do it. The peer pressure proved to great.

"Very well then," she said. "I'll participate in your...'experiment.'"

"Excellent!" Jon said. He turned slightly to his left and began to raise his voice in no particular direction. "Ok Chuck when I give the signal role the first song!" The speakers system turned on and an already put together playlist was waiting in the system like bullets in a revolver's chamber.

"Ok Octavia," Jon continued, looking at his notes once more. "This first piece is from a man called Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, and is entitled 'Eine Kleine Nachtmusik.'"'

Octavia braced herself for what was to come by closing her eyes and tilting her head upwards. The music began to play with everyone but the musical Earthpony recognizing it immediately. She didn't say or do anything, she simply listened to the music which eventually cut off after 30 seconds.

"Magnificent," She finally said, looking back at Jon. "Simply magnificent. The way the music flowed was very sublime." Jon found it odd to hear her talk so expressively like this.

"Glad you liked it," Jon said, signaling chuck to play the next song. "Alright now just as a warning...this next song is a bit more modern than what you're probably used to." Once again she prepared herself by closing her eyes and tilting her head.

"This next one is a personal favorite of mine," He said, "It's a song called 'All you need is love' and its by a very famous group called 'The Beatles."

As the music played some of the audience members could be seen mouthing the words as it played overhead. This time around Jon joined Octavia by closing his eyes too. The soundbite was only 30 seconds long but it was set in just the right place so she could hear the 'All you need is love' portion.

"Hmm, very interesting," She said, now looking at Jon once more. "You were right that wasn't what I'm used to, but I have to admit it was very...compelling. I liked it; especially the orchestra in the background." Jon was so pleased to hear this that he pumped his fist and grabbed her hoof for quick handshake, much to her surprise.

"Alright just two more," Jon said, holding back a devious grin from appearing on his face. "Ok this next one...is very modern. It's a song called "RIGHT IN"

Some of audience members couldn't help but laugh at Jon's plan. At the time Octavia paid them no mind.

"This particular song is composed by a young lad by the name of Skrillex," Jon continued, sitting up in his chair, "A very famous musician of today's youth."

As Jon signaled for the song to play Octavia continued her ritual of closing her eyes and raising her head. Had she not done so she would have noticed Jon using his hands to cover his ears.

The music began to play and immediately it caused Octavia to tense up and sport a look of disgust on her face. The soundbite ended much sooner than the last two and she began to rub her ears as if she was in great pain.

"That...was revolting. Absolutely abysmal" She said, glaring at Jon. "I'm sorry to whoever Skrillex is but that was the most ghastly noise I have ever heard. Please tell me that's not what all music sounds like over here."

Jon chuckled and then proceeded to check his notes for a final time.

"Alright...we--" Jon said trying not to laugh. "This final song is called--" Jon stopped mid sentence at the sight of Octavia looking at him with suspicious eyes. Jon quickly scooted forward and placed a hand on her hoof for comfort.

"No, no, no!" He said vigorously. "I can-- I promise, this next one will be good! I swear! Can...can I play it?"

Octavia took her hoof back and hesitantly allowed him to proceed.

"Thank you!" He continued. "Ok this final piece is called "Für Elise" and was composed by the legendary Ludwig van Beethoven .

She gave Jon a nod and for the last time closed her eyes and held her head skywards. As the music played something different occurred. Even though it was a very small gesture Jon was surprised to see that this time around Octavia started to sway side to side to the rhythm of the music. She even at one point took a deep breath as is she was trying to breath in the melodies.

"So what did you think?" Jon asked after the music had stopped.

"That...was heavenly," she said, her eyes still closed. "I've never heard such wondrous music before. It was simple and yet it contained so much beauty. I could feel the composer's love for the arts engraved in every note. Who did you say composed that?"

"Ludwig van Beethoven." Jon answered, happy to see his guest more at ease.

"Well then before I leave you must give me the sheet music to some of his others works." She said, her eyes now open again.

"Should be easy enough." He said. "Since I won't have to deal with pesky lawyers to get them."

"Ah. I can only assume Mr. Beethoven is no longer around then." Octavia said.

"Afraid not," Jon said. "He passed away many, many years ago."

"How sad." She replied.

"Yeah he's actually one of our worlds most famous musicians," Jon added. "At one point in his career he actually went deaf."

Octavia's eyes shot up at Jon so quickly she almost spilled the remainder of her tea.

"I'm sorry, but did you say he was deaf?" She asked.

"Yeah he was," Jon answered. "But despite all that he still produced music."

"I see," Octavia said, looking at her reflection in her tea which was almost gone. "I can only imagine the amount challenges and hardships he had to endure as an artist because it."

Years of interviewing people gave Jon many skills. One of which was identifying when a guest what ready to open up about something.

"What about you, Octavia?" He asked.

"What do you mean? She responded.

"Have you ever had to overcome any challenges as an artist yourself?" Jon retorted. For the first time she looked like she was at a lose for words. Finally she began to talk once more.

"Well actually yes I have. It may not be as extreme as losing ones sense of hearing but I have." She said. "You see Mr. Stewart, as you can probably observe I am an Earthpony." Jon nodded and continued to listen. This was something he had indeed noticed.

"Well the thing is most musicians, especially those who perform with string instruments, are unicorns." She continued, once again regaining her composure. "It makes it easier to properly operate them when you can do so with magic." Jon was starting understand where she was going with this.

"As for me, well I have to use my own hooves which as you may guess is very difficult." She added.

Thinking back Jon did notice that a large number of ponies at the concert he crashed were unicorns. The more he thought about it the more he realized Octavia was the only Earthpony he saw that day.

"It must have been hard for you be taken seriously by others." Jon said.

"You have no idea," Octavia responded. "Growing up all I wanted to do was to play the cello but I was constantly told by others how impossible it would be for someone like myself."

"With hindsight...being where you are now, do you ever feel like finding those same people and just going: 'What now asshole? How many first chairs do you have?'" Jon asked trying his best to lighten the mood.

"As...tempting as that may sound I would never do that," She answered. "Its not very becoming."

"Now. What would you say did-- helped you to achieve what you have today," Jon asked. "Basically despite everyone saying otherwise...what kept you going."

The question was very straight forward but Octavia still took awhile to respond. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as if what she was about to say were her final words to the world.

"Well Mr. Stewart...I would like to say that I did it all on my own through sheer determination," Octavia said. "But the truth is I had some help...from a very special friend."

"And who would that be?" Jon asked with anticipation. Octavia looked as if she was struggling to put together her next string of sentences.

"Well...I don't know if you recall but remember earlier on how I mention I had a roommate?" She asked.

"Yes, yes I do." Jon answered.

"Well actually she's...more than just a roommate." She added. "She's actually a very close friend of mine. Her name is Vinyl Scratch."

Jon was amazed that he had finally gotten Octavia to open up about something personal. But what amazed him more was that for the first time since the start of the interview (And indeed since they first met) Octavia had smiled; she did so when she said Vinyl's name.

"You see I've known her since we were both little fillies," she continued. "And she was always there by my side, ready to give me a pat on the back when I succeeded or a hug whenever I failed."

"She sounds great." Jon said.

"Oh she is Mr. Stewart, she is. You know at one point in my life I almost dropped out of music school because I couldn't take being teased and laughed at by my classmates...you know for being an Earthpony." Octavia said. "But vinyl talked me out of it the next day. She said she'd never forgive me if I gave up on myself."

"Teased and laughed at, huh." Jon thought to himself. "I can see why she didn't want to come on my show at first."

"Actually, she's also the reason why I'm present on your show today." Octavia said with a smile.

"Oh really!" Jon exclaimed.

"Yes, after our little...encounter I went back to our place and told her what happened," Octavia continued. "She then convinced me reconsider and said she would be cheering me on from back home."

Jon was happy that he had finally gotten Octavia to open up about something, he just didn't know that this certain something just happened to be the most important person in her life.

"Wow...she really does sound like a good friend. It's always nice to have someone you can rely on to help you." Jon said. "You know based on your description of her one could say she's your better half."

The offhanded compliment caused Octavia to blush somewhat but she quickly recovered and fired back with a "compliment" of her own.

"Thank Mr. Stewart. Oh and by the way I would like to recant a previous statement of mine," she said with a grin. "I actually have watched your show before."

"Is that so?" Jon said leaning forward.

"Indeed I have." She said. "Though its usually because I'm just waiting for 'The Colbert Report' to start...you know with Stephen Colbert, your better half."

The crowd laughed at Jon while Octavia sat there looking proud of herself.

"I knew bringing you on the show was a good idea." Jon said, waving his finger and adjusting his suit.

"Which reminds me," Octavia added. "Why did you decide to have me on your show? Especially after how I treated you when we met."

"Well it was actually my assistance's idea," Jon answered. "She saw a little profile I did of you and thought the show could 'use some class.'"

"Well that was certainly a nice gesture," Octavia said. "But if I may comment. I think your show is very 'classy' without me, especially since your last guest."

"Who Ms. Cheerilee?" Jon asked, looking puzzled. He certainly thought she was a stand up woman but to describe her as 'classy' seemed a bit much. Especially compared to Octavia.

"Oh heaven yes Mr. Stewart. I mean I may be a renowned cellist..." She said, taking a second to finish the last drop of tea in her mug. "...but Ms. Cheerilee has class every Monday through Friday."

Jon was certain that hell had just frozen over. Not only did Octavia tell a joke but she managed to make Jon laugh. The entire audience joined Jon in laughter but took it to another level and began to applaud the gifted Earthpony.

"Octavia...it was great having you on the show!" Jon said over the audience. "I wish nothing but the best of luck to you and your future endeavors!

"Thank you, Jon!" She said leaning forward to shake his hand.

"Tell Vinyl I said 'hi.'" He added. "Octavia everyone! We'll be right back."

The crowd stood in tumultuous applause as Jon leaned forward to whisper something in Octavia's ear. As he did the camera slowly panned away just barely missing seeing Jon walk around his desk to pose next to Octavia for any fan to take a picture. The last thing the viewers see is the 'Daily Show logo' flying on the screen only to dash off screen as the program fades into another commercial break.

Episode 6 [Zecora]: The question

It was a particularity sunny afternoon in New York, and while most people were outside enjoying the much needed good weather Jon found himself at home preparing for future shows.

The public's desires for more Equestrian interviews was as insatiable as ever to the point where "The Daily" Show was now synonymous with "Ponies." To that end Jon was determined to make it so he could have a solid schedule of who would come on the show ahead of time instead of him having to go there in person to ask them at the last minute.

This proved to be more difficult than he thought, what with their world being so far away and Jon not knowing who any of them were or what they did till he made contact. This wasn't helped by the studio executives constantly giving him advice on who he should talk to next.

Ultimately the decision of who came on the show rested with Jon but that didn't stop his bosses from offering ideas anyway.

"Try and interview some kind of monster!"

"Why don't you have their leader on sometime?"

"Does that world have any politicians?

"You've been there before. Have you ever seen a talking dog?"

For the most past Jon ignored these suggestions and mainly focused on trying to conduct interviews that were equal parts humorous and informative. That is until one day at work when an intern approached him.

"Mr. Stewart, here’s the papers you wanted." The intern said.

"Thank you Erick," Jon replied, as he wrote something down in his notebook. "Please go to the graphics department. I hear they need some help with something."

"Sure thing Boss." He said, pausing for a moment before speaking again. "But um...before I go can I ask you something…about the Equestrian interviews?" Jon didn't particularity like talking about work even when he was at work, but if his staff needed his help understanding something he felt that it was his duty to assist them.

"Sure thing kid," Jon said. "Shoot."

"Well, t-the guests you've been getting from Equestria have all been great," Erick said. "But I'm curious...are they all ponies?"

Jon almost answered by saying "yes," but as he did he realized it was something he could not answer with 100% certainty. This question would follow him for the next 24 hours, stuck in his head like a catchy song. Whenever Jon visited Equestria on business he saw nothing but ponies. Some of them could fly or use magic while others possessed none of these abilities, but in the end they were all still ponies nonetheless.

At the same time however Jon could not deny that he had seen a non-pony citizens at one point. After all the very first guest he had on his show was Spike. A dragon.

The question continued to cling to Jon's mind, refusing to let go. So it was on this sunny afternoon, locked away in his study, that Jon decided to pick up his phone and ask the only person he knew who could help him understand.

"Hello Jon." Celestia said. "I wasn't expecting to hear from you at this hour."

"Oh sorry Celestia," He said, getting up to idly look through his bookcase. "If this is an inconvenient time I can call back later."

"It's quite alright," she responded. "I always have time for you."

"Thaaaat's great to hear," Jon said. "Just don't feel like you have to bend over backwards on my account."

"Wouldn't dream of it Jon. Now what is it that you wish to talk about?" She said.

"Well here's the thing," Jon said. "I've been racking my brain on an issue and have so far come up with nothing, so I'm just going to ask you straight up...does Equestria have other talking animals besides ponies?"

"Of course we do," Celestia said with a joyous laugh. "Or have you already forgotten about Spike."

"Forget? The kid can send mail across different planes of existence by breathing fire on it and he almost ate my assistant's necklace," Jon responded. "Trust me when I say, 'I remember spike.'"

Celestia couldn't help but giggle to herself quietly. She still had Jon's accidentally delivered notes on sex robots in her possession; she was keeping them as a souvenir.

"No, the thing is I've been to your world a few times," he continued. "And every time the people I've seen have been some variation of a pony."

"Well Jon, our world is inhabited by a multitude of different creatures but the most common are in fact ponies." Celestia said informatively. "Very similar to your world being mostly populated by different kinds of humans."

"I guess that makes sense," Jon retorted. "Though I have to admit with a name like Ponyville I wasn't sure what I was expecting."

Jon continued to browse through his book case till he finally found the book he was looking for. Tt was a fairy tale book, this one being a type of encyclopedia on mythical beasts. In no time at all he was back at his desk and opened the book to a random page.

"Now then back to what I was saying," he said, flipping through some pages. "My next question to you is this: are there anyone on the list who isnt a pony."

Celestia took a moment to think about that as she had to go over the list in her head by memory. Jon however had the luxury of having the list of names in his hand, ready to jot down some notes if need be.

"As a matter of fact there are some," she finally answered. "Would you like me to go into further detail?"

"Please do." Jon said, pen ready in hand.

"Well off the top of my head we have a young lady by the name of Gilda," she said. "She's a well known flyer from Cloudsdale and she happens to be a Griffon."

Jon repeated back what he just heard for clarification and quickly found her name on the list, writing next to it: "Good flyer. Griffon." His next step was going through the book of fairly tale creatures he had just procured. Eventually he found an entry for Griffon, complete with pictures and descriptions.

"I see," Jon responded. "She sounds majestic. What else do ya got?"

"Well this next individual isn't a resident of my kingdom." Celestia said. "He's something of a motivational speaker who goes from place to place."

"A motivational speaker, huh?" Jon said, his interest starting to decrease.

"Yes, his name is Iron Will," Celestia continued. "And he’s a Minotaur."

"A Minotaur, huh?" Jon said, his interest starting to increase.

Jon once again multitasked by looking through his book of creatures and the list of names. Almost at the same time he found an entry for Minotaurs and located Iron Will's name.

The picture provided in the book was a bull-faced subhuman wielding an axe and looking very ferocious. Jon's interest was replaced with suspicion as he wondered if this Iron Will motivated people or just simply scared them. He turned his attention to the list and wrote next to his name: "Minotaur. Possibly dangerous motivational speaker."

"Anyone else?" Jon asked. "Maybe someone a bit more local?"

"Well there is one who lives fairly close to Ponyville," she said. "An interesting character but I don't think she's what you’re looking for."

"Try me." Jon said, flipping back to the index section of his book.

"Well her name is Zecora and I'm fairly certain her species dwells within your world as well," she continued. "You see she's a zebra."

Jon didn't need the book for this one.

"A zebra?" He said. "Well yes we do have them here but they're only located in Africa. What does this zebra do for a living?" Celestia took a moment before responding.

"What she does is a little difficult to explain," Celestia said, "The best explanation I can give that would make sense to someone from your world is that she's a shaman who works with medicine."

Jon sat up in his chair looking as if he would spring to his feet at any moment.

"A shaman you say?" He said, looking for Zekora's name on the list. "That does sound interesting. Tell me does she use herbs and plants to make potions and stuff like that?"

"As a matter of fact she does. How very astute of you," Celestia said. "Do you have people like that in your world as well."

"You could say that," Jon said as he jotted down a phrase next to the zebra's name. "But never on my show...I've made my decision. I have an episode coming up and I would like to have her as my guest."

"A fine choice indeed," Celestia said. "I'll send word right away that I wish to speak with her." Jon stood up to put his book back.

"You know if you want I can go there myself and ask here." Jon said. "Going to your world every now and again have proved to be very rewarding at times. Plus I don't want you going out of your way because of me."

"Well Mr. Stewart, while I am appreciative of your looking out for me I don't think you'd enjoy the hands on approach in this particular case." Celestia said.

"Why do you say that?" Jon asked. "Is this Zecora not a fan of humans or something?"

"Oh no, no, nothing like that," she answered. "She's a very kind individual. It's just that her dwellings are on the outskirts of Ponyville located in the heart of a rich forest. She lives in a hut...adjacent to a swamp."

Jon stopped dead in his tracks as if someone just pointed a gun at him and told him to not move. Slowly he turned to his standing mirror and looked at the suit he was wearing, then imagined the same suit covered in a thick layer of mud.

"On second thought," Jon said. "Why don't you take care of this one. I'm tagging you in!"

"Of course," Celestia said with a slight laugh. "I'll have her in your studio the morning of your show. Have a nice day."

Jon said his farewells and with a tired sigh made his way back to his desk. All at once he collapsed in his chair rubbing his head to ward off any incoming headaches. After a moment of silence he looked over at the note he left beside Zecora's name.

Zecora- "Zebra Witch Doctor"

"This should be interesting." Jon thought.

Episode 6 [Zecora]: Please welcome to the show Zecora

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Zecora
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

Heavily edited stock footage of the streets of New York appeared on screen letting both the audiences at home and in the studio know that the show was back from its commercial break.

The audience stood and cheered as the camera did a quick loop around before zooming in on Jon. The crowd continued their praise as Jon wrote furiously in his notes, so much so that some of them escaped and fell to the ground. He grabbed whatever pages still remained and looked into the camera.

"Welcome back to the show, ladies and gentleman my guest tonight!" Jon said, slamming his palm on the desk for emphasis. "She is a local medicine woman for the town of Ponyville whose skills and knowledge have made her a well respected consort. Please welcome to the show Zecora!"

As the crowd erupted with applause a figure emerged from backstage immediately waving and smiling in their direction. Jon set a course to meet her before she got to the desk and along the way noticed a few interesting characteristics about her.

By all accounts his guest certainly looked like a zebra but at the same time she had some extra features about her. The stripes she carried were a lot more detailed than just simple up and down patterns and her cutie mark was a spiral sun. She wore what looked like gold jewelry from hear ears, hooves, and even around her neck. Aand even though he was no expert Jon thought they looked African. When he finally met with her he shook her hoof and helped her onto her seat.

One last thing he noticed as the crowd calmed down was that she was wearing a bag around her waist which looked to be bursting from the seams. Jon had hoped that it was filled with potions or something that she could demonstrate for him. Later one however he would learn that Zecora had wondered around “The Daily show” building collecting roots from office plants to bring back home with her.

"Zecora welcome to 'The Daily Show' glad you could make it!" Jon said with a smile.

"Thank you Jon and may I say, I'm very happy to be here today." Zecora said with a smile of her own. At the time Jon thought it was cute even a little funny that she rhymed on accident.

"Well I think...tha- I speak for everyone when I say we're glad you you're here too." He said stopping for a moment to let the audience finish their quick cheer. "Oh and by the way I've been researching on what zebras eat, in case you were wondering why your gift basket was filled with grass."

"Well now I feel like such a fool. I already ate and my stomachs fool." Zecora said, rubbing her belly. "I must admit it was quite a sight! Next time I'm here I'll remember to eat light."

Jon's smile slowly disappeared and his eyebrow slowly lifted in confusion. He stared at his guest for a moment before turning to the audience with the same look causing them to laugh. After a few seconds of silence Zecora began to look worried.

"Dearest Jon is something wrong? That pause you gave was slightly long." She finally said. The audience began to laugh again, with a few of them clapping as well.

"Do me a favor." Jon responded. "I want you to say anything...ju-just absolutely anything that comes to mind."

"Ok Jon I will do my best, and with luck I will to pass your test." Zecora said. "Although I'm afraid I won’t say a lot, I'm not very good at being put on the spot."

Jon looked to his audience again now with a look of astonishment as he raised his hands in the air almost as if to ask them if they knew what was going on.

"Um...I'll be honest with you Zecora I don't know much about Equestrian etiquette but I'm gonna be straight with you," he said, trying to be delicate. "Why are you rhyming?"

The question seemed to confuse Zecora who, up until now, never had anyone question her speaking style.

"This is just the way I talk, much like you and how you walk." She answered. "You walk on two legs I on four. It's just the way we are, need I say more?" The audience began to applaud which only confused Zecora more. To her she hadn't done anything to earn their admiration.

"Not at all Zecora because now I know, welcome again to my show." Jon said, trying to match her rhythm. "Talking like this is harder than I thought. I really wish I had...a rhyming dictionary."

The crowd began to laugh at the defeated host while Zecora smiled at his attempt to imitate her.

"Sorry, I'm not used to speaking like that." He said with a shrug.

"It's alright Jon I understand, talking like me was not part of your plan." Zecora said patting Jon's hand with her hoof. "I must admit you had good form, for someone who rhyming is not his norm." Jon gave her a look that suggested he was impressed.

"Wow...you must have kicked some serious ass in your creative writing courses." He said nodding his head. "Look, I don't mean to beat a dead horse here but how do you do it?" Zecora gave Jon a friendly smile but at the same time had a hard time understand his fascination with her speaking pattern.

"Well rhyming can be very tricky, the thing is to try and not be picky." She said looking at Jon and then the audience. "Others think ahead and give much thought, but for me I just make them up on the spot."

Jon took a second before speaking and then turned around in the direction of the backstage.

"Hey I'm still gonna need that rhyming dictionary!" He yelled, causing both the audience and his guest to laugh.

"So I've...I've been learning a lot about pony culture. One thing I've learned about is cutie marks." Jon said trying to sound professional. "So tell us Zecora what's your special talent? I'm guessing its freestyling?"

"My special talent is not in plain sight, allow me to help and shed some light." She said. "While your talent is to interview, mine is to make a witches brew."

"That's right you primarily make things like tonics and potions for the people of Ponyville, don't you?" Jon asked, extending his hand.

"Yes Jon that his correct, and because of this I've earned their respect." She answered.

"Now what exactly to mean by that?" Jon asked, sitting up and leaning forward. "Are you saying that at one point...they didn't like you or something?"

"At one point yes this was the case, they would run and hide when I entered their place," Zecora answered. "To look upon me no pony would dare, I guess you could say I gave them all a scare."

"It almost sounds like they had some...prejudiced towards you." Jon said, wondering if racism could even exist in such a happy place like Equestria.

"I wouldn't say it went that far, they were just scared and thought I was bizarre." She continued. "It is fine now because they’ve learned, that when I am around there's no need for concern."

"Well that's great to hear," Jon said, laughing nervously on purpose. "Because I- ha ha-- I mean, someone from Africa experiencing forms of bigotry...thats...ha ha...thats never happened before."

Zecora in a state of intrigue tilted her head to the side, she once again found herself confused by something Jon had said.

"You have my attention. My interests now piqued, what is this place of which you speak?" Zecora asked. It took a second for Jon to respond to his guest's question both because he had to wait for the audience to stop laughing and because he had to briefly recall what he said to her.

"You mean Africa?" Jon responded. "It's a place here in our world far, far away. It's the natural habitat for zebras...in addition some people who have genetic ties over there have -- lets say have had similar experiences as you did."

"How fascinating this world can be, to learn that there are others just like me." Zecora said with a look of wonder in her eyes. "Back home life is of pastel-color, but here it's not. It makes me wonder."

"So...going back to your uh-- special talent," Jon said in an attempt to change the subject. "What kinds of potions do you usually make?"

"The kinds of potions that I create, are ones that can set a pony straight." She answered. "Whether it be the sniffles or the common cold, I can cure it with herbs and mold."

"So basically you are the walking Keiser Permanente of Ponyville?" Jon asked, noticing a look of uncertainly on her face as he did. "It's a place that sells medicine."

"You’re somewhat correct except I do not charge, I give them out for free by and large." She said, now looking at the audience. "I can cure your sick using herbs and spice, and I will do it free of price."

"Wow, free medicine for everyone in town? That's a really nice of you to do, Canada." Jon said, looking impressed. "You know I gotta say, as someone who is of...Hebrew decent your making it very tempting to leave my doctor for you."

The crowd laughed at Jon while Zecora contemplated asking him what "Canada" and "Hebrew" was. She decided not to and submitted to the fact that she would just have to ask some other day.

"I mean free pills! How can I say 'no?'" Jon added giving a shrug and talking in his best stereotypical Jewish woman accent. "Free meds whenever I want? What a bargain! Now if you could only do something about that drafty window I'd be sold."

Zocora didn't understand the context of his joke but nevertheless she found his impersonation funny and was laughing as a result. Jon, seeing this, decided to see how far he could go with his Jewish woman rant.

"Now if you could give me something clear this sinus that would be-- OH by the way, I have a son who isn't seeing anyone," Jon continued, raising an arm and leaning forward. "And I would love it if he married a doctor."

Zecora finished laughing just in time to respond, though in her haste she didn't realize Jon's proposal was only in jest.

"Thank you Jon for the offer, but I feel it would not be proper." She said. "I am from Eqestria and he from New York, we're too far apart it would never work."

Jon dropped his accent to give Zecora a break but at the same time still felt like teasing her a little bit more.

"Oh I see...you’re too good for my son!" Jon said sitting up in his chair. "Or maybe it’s because YOU just don't like humans or even-- dare I say it? Jews!"

"Jon please, this is not the case! I simply adore the human race." Zecora said, once again placing her hoof on his hand. "I'm too busy with work to have any fun, I'd never have time to court your son."

It was at more or less this point that Jon wondered if his stripped guest understood the subtleties of sarcasm.

"Thought if being with a human is what I had to do, I think I would rather be with someone like you." Zecora said. She began to turn red when the audience cooed at her advances.

"Someone like me?" Jon asked, adjusting his tie and sucking in his stomach. "Wha-Whatever do you mean?"

Zecora took a second to answer Jon’s question while her face continued its present shade of red.

"Even though you don't live where I do, you are very kind and quite a view." She answered. "You look really nice with your hair and suit--"

"It almost sounds like you think I'm cute." Jon interjected. Before Zecora could explain herself Jon picked up his notes and again changed his voice, this time to that of a southern belle.

"Oh well I do declare Ms. Zecora! I do believe you have me all in a fluster!" Jon said, fanning himself with his notes. "I mean good heavens my Papa would never allow the union of myself and a zebra...I suppose if do feel that strongly towards me I'll allow you to escort me to the Cotillion, but nothing more!"

Unbeknownst to Jon there was actually a kernel of truth in his jesting. For awhile now Zecora had thought the streaks of white and black in Jon's hair made him look rather handsome for a human. But in her embarrassment she decided to tell a little fib to avoid suspicion.

"Why Mr. Stewart you are quite bold...buuuut I'm afraid you’re just too old." She said, putting her hooves over her face to hide her blushing expression.

Jon wanted to take this moment to make a: "Whats black and white and red all over" joke but decided to not tease his guest any further than he already had.

"Too old?" Jon said, as he hung his head in shame. "I uh...I think I would've much rather heard 'being Jewish' as your reason."

This time Jon's humorous intent was loud and clear to Zecora. She found herself joining the crowd in laughter though she was still slightly blushing.

"So...going back to your private practice," Jon continued. "Could you explain to us exactly what...I guess what qualifies you to make these medicines? Like, how do you make them in the first place? Do you grow your own supplies or just have access to your own material, or what?"

"It's no secret to my success, allow me to explain there's no need to guess." She said, trying to her best to not sound boastful. "Being able to distribute medicine into circulation, is very easy because of my location."

"Your location?" Jon wondered aloud. "You mean you-- the fact that you live in a forest?"

"That is correct Jon for you see, it’s proved to be very helpful towards me. In the forest many ingredients can be found, a lot of which are on the ground.” Zecora answered. “There are so many things of which to use, all you need to do is pick and choose. It may be filled with untamed forces but it’s a handy place to find resources.”

“So for the most part you’re the only one who ever goes in the forest?” Jon asked

“You are right. What you say is true, ponies must be cautions when they walk through. It’s the kind of place that has very little sun, it’s definitely not for everyone.” Zecora said, sounding as if she was telling a ghost story. “You can easily get lost within its trees, you can’t just come and go as you please. The animals range from dangerous to quirky, plus the terrain can be shallow and murky.”

“Shallow and Murky huh? Sounds like my ex-girlfriend. BOOM!” Jon yelled as he violently pumped his fist. “BOOM!”

Jon waited for both the audience to stop laughing and for the pain in his shoulder to come to a stop before continuing.

“Now…location aside I understand you are also very knowledgeable and worldly,” Jon continued. “I hear the residents of Ponyville come to you quite often because you, more than anyone else, have vast amounts of knowledge when it comes to these kinds of things. Am I-- am I right?”

“Well I for one I do not like to boast, but when it comes to illnesses they come to me the most,” Zecora said as her ears drooped down in humility. “I know a lot about what makes you sick, and can provide the right medicine to do the trick.”

"Is that so? Well it sounds like Ponyville is very lucky to have someone like you." Jon said, his hand stroking his chin. "But tell me-- and I know we've already discussed this. But why not charge people for your services? You always have a steady flow of customers and resources; you could be making a lot of money."

Jon was certain that Zecora would take awhile to respond but to his surprise she answered right away.

"I've been blessed with my talent and wits, I have no desire for earthly bits. I simply wish to do good deeds, and I do so by tending to other’s needs." Zecora answered. "Helping others fills my heart with glee, and that is why I do it for free."

Jon was about to speak but could not as the crowd's cheers of approval, directed at Zecora, made it impossible for anyone to hear him.

"You know Zecora...I've been listening to you for a little while now and I gotta say the evidence is really piling up here." Jon said, hoping she would take his bait.

"I don't know this 'evidence' of which you speak, an explanation is what I now seek." Zecora said, her eyebrows slightly ruffled.

"Allow me to explain," Jon continued. "You live in a swamp, you're considered to be a very wise person, you're very kind in nature, and you talk in an interesting way...your mother fucking Yoda aren't you!"

The audience began laughing at Jon's whimsical comparison. But Zecora looked as confused as she had for a good portion of the interview. Jon noticed this and decided to go into further detail before she started asking questions.

"H-he's a little green warrior who, in many ways, is a lot like you." Jon explained. "He's also like 900 years old so he's old...oh and can like move things with his mind...so yeah he's pretty cool!" Looking back Jon sometimes wondered if he should've mentioned that he also wasn't real.

"This Yoda sounds like he's strong and great, for someone in his present state." She said, her eyes now filled with wonder. "I'm sure living that long has made him wise, I hope to meet him before he dies"

"Well I'll tell you what, if you ever see Celestia again ask her to teleport you to him.” Jon said as he wrote directions on his notes. “He's located in the Dagobah system a few lightyears away from planet Hoth...oh and if you find yourself on planet Alderaan you've gone too far."

"Thank you Jon. I'll make the request, I just hope he'll have me as his guest." Zecora said, taking Jon’s note and putting it in her bag.

"I'm...sure he will. But listen before you go could you stick around for a few more minutes and we'll throw the rest on the web?" Jon asked.

"Of course Jon I would love to stay, this certainly has been quite a day!" Zecora answered. “If you want I’ll stay for more than a ‘few,’ I find it a joy to be talking with you.”

"Excellent! Thanks again for being here today.” Jon added. "Zecora everyone! We'll be right back."

As the camera begins ascending upwards and away from the two, the crowd jumped to their feet and begin to cheer for more. The last imagery that anyone sees is Jon whispering something in Zecora's ear and afterwards Zecora doing the same to Jon. Soon the only thing visible to the viewers is the show's logo appearing suddenly and disappearing following with it another commercial break.

Episode 7 [Mayor Mare]: The phone call

Many changes occurred at the Daily Show office ever since Jon started doing "Equestrian Interviews." Out of all of them probably the biggest was the huge influx of interns he had to hire to answer the phones. At first Jon thought his present staff and assistant could handle the day to day phone calls from people asking about the ponies he had on his show.

But the more citizens from Equestria he interviewed the more people called, all of whom were turned away or denied further information. It had gotten to the point where Jon's current staff couldn't perform their regular duties due to the seemingly infinite invasion of phone calls. To counteract this he hired new interns, almost doubling the amount of employees he had.

The decision to hire so many unpaid workers didn't entirely sit well with him. When anyone came to work in an environment like the Daily Show they carry with them the assumption that they would have more hands duties to the show's production, as opposed to simply answering phones all day.

Though for the most part the men and woman who applied did so willingly, even after Jon's assistant Selina Jenson briefed them on what their one and only Job was. Overall it seemed as though they were just happy to working on the show...plus more interns meant more opportunities to Photoshop them in funny pictures for future segments.

Even Jon himself took the occasional phone call but this was usually from his own cellphone. These were usually calls from friends in the entertainment business cutting out the middle man and doing an end-run around his wall of interns.

These calls usually ranged from past business acquaintances to well known celebrities. He mostly answered these calls out of respect but sometimes if he was busy he'd let them go to voice mail. There were some incidents where the caller was too important to ignore; at one point he even got a call from an official in the White House of all places.

But no matter who it was or how famous they were Jon always told them the same thing. He couldn't talk bout it...that is until one night he got a phone call from a friend who was probably the most powerful of them all. Someone who he couldn't ignore or take lightly.

"Celestia?" Jon thought, as he stared at the name blinking on his phone. "Celestia is calling...me?" Jon sat at the foot of his bed and begin to piece together what this meant.

In the short time span of their partnership Jon could never recall a single moment where Celestia was the one calling him. Even when she first made contact she did so through a letter requesting that he call her. Ever since then whenever Jon needed to make a request for a someones appearance, or some general information, he would get into contact with her.

But this was different.

The sound of his cellphone calling out to him broke Jon from his daze and he immediately clicked on the answering key, unsure of what he was getting into.

"Hello?" Jon said.

"Greetings Jon," Celestia replied. "How are we doing this fine evening?"

"Oh well I'm fine," he answered, rubbing his tired eyes. "And yourself."

"Just splendid," she responded. "I hope I didn't call you at a bad time?"

"Hey that's my line!" Jon said. He wanted to mention that he was about to go to bed but decided against it.

"Oh yes I suppose it is," she said, sharing a quick laugh with him. "I imagine you're wondering why I've called you tonight."

"Oh, who me? Naaah." Jon replied. "You know being the important celebrity that I am I'm always getting phone calls from royalty at the dead of night. Why just the other day Queen Elizabeth II called me up cause she wanted to borrow my weed whacker."

Celestia laughed for a second time making Jon wonder if she genuinely thought he was funny or if she was just being polite.

"I'll be honest...I am a bit curious as to why you're the one calling me." Jon said. "Usually its the other way around; what is this opposite day?

Just as he asked his question a thought manifested in his head. This might not be a social call at all. Maybe something had happened; an emergency of some sorts perhaps. In which case he figured he should stop joking around for a second.

"Wait is something wrong? You're not in any kind of trouble are you?" Jon asked.

"Oh no everything is quite alright," Celestia answered. "Actually I'm calling because an associate of mine has expressed interest in speaking with you."

"An associate?" Jon asked. "Wait someone from Equestria wants to talk with me?...This really is opposite day."

"She's actually a very important pony to the citizens of Ponyville," She added. "But I'll understand if you're too busy to speak with her."

"No, no, its fine. I'll be more than happy to talk to..." Jon said, leaving his statement to float for a bit so Celestia could interject.

"Mayor Mare." Celestia said. "Her name is Mayor Mare. I'll patch her through right now."

"Mayor Mare?" Jon thought, as the line started changing in pitch and volume, struggling to reconnect. "What the hell kind of a name is--

"Hello?" A voice said over Jon's phone. "Can anypony hear me?"

"Uh yeah I can hear you." Jon said. Even though he couldn't see the mysterious caller he could tell, based on her voice, she was an older woman. Maybe late 40's.

"Oh splendid!" The voice said. "Am I speaking with Mr. Jon Stewart?"

"Yes...yes you are," Jon said as he ran his hand through his hair. "I'm sorry but who is this?"

"Oh dear, where are my manners?" The voice said, clearing her throat. "My name is Mayor Mare and I'm the Mayor of the district of Ponyville." Jon inferred before hand, based on her name, that this was the case. Though he refused to believe it till he heard it himself.

A blood-born member of royalty had just introduced Jon to a duly elected civil servant. The absurdity of it was enough to make Jon compress his face in disbelief; this was certainly a first for him.

"Well its a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Mayor." Jon said with a stretch. "If you're calling to inform me on Ponyville's latest legislative policies I should warn you I'm a little out of your jurisdiction."

"Oh my!" Mayor said with a chuckle. "They were right about you. Quick on hooves as always it seems."

"Ma'am I don't mean to sound rude," Jon said as he rubbed his eyes, "But it is late and my wife will kill me I don't--"

"Oh I am sorry! I forget that our time zones don't exactly synch up," she interrupted. "Anyway as I said before I am the Mayor of Ponyville and it's my understanding that you have a show coming up in a few days. If it's alright with you I would like to throw my hat into the ring, so to speak, and humbly request that you allow me on your show as the next guest on "Equestrian Interviews!"

And another first.

Jon was no stranger to people coming in contact with him with the sole intention of appearing on his show, politicians especially were among the most guilty of this. It was actually a very regular occurrence and in Jon's experience they all usually did so with ulterior motives.

But in this case he had never had someone from Equestria call him offering themselves as a guest. In time though he would learn that there were in fact many others who wanted to but lacked that knowledge of how to get in contact with him.

"Are you still there?" The Mayor asked.

"Uh yeah I'm still here." Jon answered. "And I appreciate your offer but--"

"Now before you make your decision." She interjected. "Allow me to present my credentials. I've been the Mayor at Ponyville for over 10 years now, elected three times by landslide results, and I've never had a single scandal!"

Jon had to admit that this was all very impressive, though from an entertainer's point of view her last achievement wasn't a good selling point in her favor.

"Well that's all very nice," Jon added. "But I've actually been planning a schedule ahead of time and I'm not sure if I can--

"Now Mr. Stewart before you say anything else let me say that I do know where you're coming from," she interjected again. "I understand that you like to make these kinds of decisions yourself and I can respect that. But at the same time we both know politics plays a big role on your show. It's practically your bread and butter."

"She certainly does sound like a politician." Jon thought to himself, as he was slowly starting to give in to her argument.

"So would it not make sense for you to have someone like me on your show?" She added. "Imagine the kind of ratings you could get with a tag line like 'Jon interviews his first pony politician!'" Although Jon wasn't entirety fond of her approach he had to admit she had a good point.

He had nothing against her personally; his distaste purely stemmed from her poor timing. He'd had a long day.

"If I say yes will you let me go to sleep?" Jon asked, already writing himself a reminder to call Jenson in the morning.

"Of course!" She replied.

"Ok then, in that case the next appearance slot is yours." Jon said, his tired demeanor clearly present. "Have Celestia transport you to the studio on Monday and my assistant will take care of the rest."

"Oh thank you Mr. Stewart!" She said with enough enthusiasm for both herself and Jon. "I look forward to meeting you in person. Good night!"

Jon sat there listening to the dead ringtone for a good ten seconds before falling backwards on his bed.

"A pony politician." He thought with a laugh. "They actually have government...and here I thought their world was perfect."

Episode 7 [Mayor Mare]: Please welcome to the show Mayor Mare

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Mayor Mare (Mayor)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

After another somewhat lengthy commercial break "The Daily Show" returned to it's final segment of the night. The screams of joy coming from the audience indicated that the upcoming segment was none other than the interview portion of the show between Jon and his guest.

The camera very quickly zoomed in on Jon who was seen playing with his chair. Swiveling back and forth while adjusting his height, idly looking everywhere but straight ahead at the camera. After a few seconds of nothing but cheering Jon finally sits up in his chair, notes in hand, and begins to address the public.

"Welcome to 'The Daily Show,' we have a very special guest tonight!" Jon said as he quickly stretched both arms behind his back. "She is the mayor of Ponyville currently on her third term. Please welcome to the show Mayor Mare!"

The crowd applauded at the guest of evening who made her way onto the stage. She wasted no time and was already waving at the audience, walking at a slow pace giving her more time to do so.

Her coat was very light brown and her mane had various shades of light grey. She wore very professional looking gold rimmed glasses, and much like Octavia she had a loose collar. Instead of a bowtie however she wore a teal colored neck warmer. All this (plus the tone of her voice) gave the impression that she was much older than the other ponies Jon had on his show in the past.

Jon met with her halfway on stage and shook her hoof, stopping briefly to let those in the audience take a picture of two.

When Jon tried to guide Mayor Mare to his desk she stood on her hind legs and grabbed his hand with both hooves to keep him in place, prolonging their photo-op. Jon tried to respectfully break free but his grey haired guest wouldn't allow it. Eventually Jon gave in and continued to wave at the audience while simultaneously shaking her hoof.

After an appropriate amount of time had passed (Appropriate to Mayor Mare) the two made their way to the center of the stage; as usual Jon offered his guest a seat and he took his. More waiting occurred but this time for the audience to calm down which wasn't helped by the Mayor who was still waving at them.

"Welcome to the show, Mayor Mare!" Jon yelled over the crowd. "Glad you could make it!"

"Thank you Jon!" She fired back. "And please call me Mayor. Everypony else does."

"No problem. So...I-- if you don't mind I'm gonna get right to the chase," Jon continued. "You...you're the mayor of Ponyville, right?"

"Well that's what it says in the record books," she answered with her head held high. "Voted Mayor three times, thank you very much!"

"See that's the thing...I was under the impression that Equestria was a monarchy." He continued. "I mean I'm met with your princess and she seems to call the shots around those parts. Granted from what I recall she doesn't live in Ponyville...but doesn't rule the land?"

"Well yes your assumption is partly correct but what one needs to understand is there are differently bodies of government in different parts of Equestria. All working differently but all under the rule of the princess." The Mayor said, looking more at the camera than Jon.

"You see that to me just seems very bizarre." Jon added. "I mean how can a system like Ponyville's, which is a democracy, work under the princess. Someone of royalty."

To his surprise the Mayor was very quick to answer almost as if she had been planning for every possible scenario of questioning.

"I realize it can be very difficult for an outsider such as yourself to understand." She said, sounding not at all condescending. "For the most part the princess is a very hoofs off kinda dictator. She lets places like Cloudsdale and of course Ponyville conduct themselves how they want and only intervenes whenever she feels its absolutely necessary."

"I see. I think I'm starting to understand a little bit more." Jon said, stroking his chin. "We have a somewhat similar thing here in America where we have both federal and state laws. The federal law embodies the entire nation while the state laws vary depending on where you live."

"Oh how fascinating!" The Mayor replied. She leaned forward by putting her front hooves on the desk. "Tell me though, does your world have any bodies of royalty?"

"Well there are some sovereign nations in the world who still have acting members of their Royal family." Jon answered. "The most famous of which is our greatest ally England. They themselves still have their Queen but she's largely just a figure head. Even they run their country as a democracy."

"So there's no queen here in New York?" The Mayor asked.

"Well actually that's not true...If you head on down to lower Manhattan you'll find a whole bunch of queens." Jon said, clearing this throat over the crowd's laughter. "And for the right price they'll show you their own royal bodies."

Although she didn't understand the term "queens" Mayor Mare could grasp the context of the joke and as as result laughed accordingly.

"Also before we go one I'd like to ask you something...as a Mayor I mean." Jon continued. "Ok here's the thing...our mayor here in New York recently passed a law that I would like to get your opinion on if you don't mind."

"Certainly." The Mayor said, motioning for Jon to continue. He does by briefly bending down to get something from under his desk and placing it in front of her.

What Jon had retrieved was two 16 ounce cups: one filled with soda and the other about half way filled with 25 grams of Marijuana. Mayor Mare showed no signs of understanding or confusion but just simply took turns starting at both Jon and the audience who were cheering him on.

"Now...now this cup is filled with Coke and this one is filled with weed." Jon said pausing to let the crowd finish their cheering. "So as a mayor yourself wha-- which of these do you think is more illegal."

Mayor Mare was about to speak but was cut off by an audience member giving an audible scream of approval. After a quick laugh she responded.

"Well Jon I'm afraid I won't be of much use to you here," she said, looking at both containers. "I'm not exactly sure what any of these are." Jon leaned forward to point at each container in an effort to help her understand.

"Well this is Marijuana. Its a type of plant that humans use for medical reasons or recreational use." He explained. "And this is Coke, it's a soft drink product. Currently in New York if you're caught with this much weed that's a $100 fine...but if you're caught selling this much soda that's a $200 fine. I just want to get your take on this."

"Well with all due respect I don't feel comfortable giving my opinion on the plant since I'm not fully aware of its properties," The Mayor said. "But as for the soft drink we actually have a similar product back in Ponyville. Its produced and distributed by the Apple family, and I can't imagine putting a tariff on such a poplar drink."

"So you wouldn't criminalized it like our Mayor did with soda?" Jon asked.

"No, no I wouldn't." She responded. "Ponies love it so doing that just seems, excuse my language but, stupid."

"THANK YOU!" Jon said, causing the crowd to roar with excitement. While Mayor Mare was waving to them yet again Jon took the time to put away both containers.

"Now uh...lets continue. So how did you become the Mayor?" Jon asked. "Is being a politician your special talent or something?"

"Well Jon my life story has always revolved around Ponyville," she answered. "I was born there and that's where I grew up."

"Ah, a hometown hero, huh?" Jon interjected.

"That's right; born and raised." She said proudly. "And as for my special talent well growing up my mother was always working so, being the eldest sibling out of five, a lot of the day to day responsibilities around the house fell on me. It was then that I discovered I was a natural born leader when I could...rally my brothers a sisters to help me."

"So I'm guessing you made your siblings do all the work while you sat and watch?" Jon asked, getting a quick laugh from all who heard. "Typical politician."

"No trust me it wasn't like that. I just found that I had a gift for micro-management as well as public speaking." She continued. "So when I got older I wanted to use these talents to help the town I loved for so long, and that's when i decided to run for office...to help the great people of Ponyville!"

Jon took a second for the audience to stop applauding before responding.

"Speaking of the people of Ponyville not too long ago I got a chance to interview one of your citizens," Jon continued, "You may know her she's the school teacher, Ms. Cheerilee."

"Oh yes of course I know Ms. Cheerilee." The Mayor responded.

"Well last time she was on the show she told me something very interesting." He continued. "She told me that education in Equestria never gets cut. Now as the mayor of Ponyville could you...I guess give us further detail on this or like-- is that really true?"

"Well as someone who is largely responsible with handling Ponyville's funding I can say for certainty that yes that is the case." She answered.

"So you never cut their funding-- wow, I find that to be just very inspiring." He responded.

"As a matter a fact a lot of our funding goes to education," The Mayor continued, now turning to the camera. "Our children's future is very important and as Mayor of Ponyville I have continued uphold my promises to never cut funding to education." Jon began to wonder if she was sitting on an office chair or a soap box.

"Why is it that you're so surprised by that?" The Mayor asked. "Don't your schools get funding?"

"Generally speaking we do," Jon answered. "It's just that when it comes to America education gets a very small percentage of our overall funds. It usually ranks at the lowest and it's always the first to get cut."

"Then where does the rest of it go to?" She asked, taking down mental notes.

"Well of course it goes to other facets of life such as: transportation, healthcare, environment," Jon explained. "But much like education those don't much either...no, what gets the most funding here is our military."

"How very interesting," The mayor replied. "That certainly does explain a lot. You see unlike your country Ponyville doesn't have a military. As a matter of fact very few places in Equestria do."

"Is that right? So...how do you guys protect yourselves?" Jon asked, unsure if lack of a military was entirely a good or bad thing.

"Well sometimes we do get help from Canterlot," She responded. "There are royal guards located there who help keep the peace, but as you might guess they're primarily located with royal members of the family."

"I'll be honest Mayor...it sounds like Ponyville gets the short end of the stick here." Jon said. "They...they get the royal family, who governs the land, and all the muscle. What does Ponyville get?"

"Well don't get me wrong we're not defenseless," The Mayor said. "While its true that yes we do lack a military it is also everyponies civic duty to help protect Ponyville. To that end whenever calamity finds it's way to our doorstep we always have able bodied colts and mares willing to help. Some more than others."

"Alright then, but let me give you a scenario." Jon said, trying to be serious with the issue. "Lets say there's a hurricane over the coast and its headed right towards Ponyville. You have 24 hours till it hits. What do you do?"

"Well in that case first and foremost I'd do a complete evacuation of the town just in case we couldn't stop it," She said, causing Jon to look puzzled. "Next I'd gather every Pegasus I could find, brief them on the issue and have them try to disperse or at the very least send the hurricane back to coast line. I'd also probably have Rainbow Dash leading the group."

Unknown to Jon her answer was actually a very "by the book" response. The scenario that he had presented her was actually one that Ponyville had practiced for in the past, usually by running hurricane and evacuation drills.

"I'm sorry." Jon said. "But did you say the Pegasus ponies would...'send it back?'"

"That is correct Jon." She answered, noticing the continued look of confusion on his face. "Oh, dont you know?...A Pegasus can control the weather."

The crowd laughed at Jon who was now leaning way back in his chair and throwing his arms up in disbelief. He wanted to keep his line of questions serious but to him this new bit of information was an open invitation to throw all sense of professionalism out the window.

Ok then how bout this! So lets say, oh I don't knooow...a stranger suddenly and without warning appears in Ponyville," Jon continued, giving a overly dramatic shrug. "A handsome stranger belonging to a species you've never seen before and citizens are scared. What do you do."

As always the Mayor was quick to respond, with both an answer and chuckle.

"Well Jon I'll tell you. We would probably have our brightest minds come together to determine what species it is and if it's dangerous. Knowing my citizens one Twilight Sparkle would definitely volunteer to do this." She answered confidently. "Next, assuming the creature is friendly, I would personally welcome him or her to the town and try to see if it needs help."

"Alright I'll give you that one...next scenario!" Jon said dramatically. "The entire town's supply of pastries have become sentient and they have decided to rise up against the citizens of Ponyville for eating their brothers and sisters! Their on the attack and half of Ponyville has been taken over. What do you do?"

"Oh that is a tough one. Well in this case my first task would probably be to gather up the hungriest ponies in town to fight on the front line, holding them off while everyone else escapes to Sweet Apple Acres for shelter." The Mayor said trying not to laugh. "If we need to we'll use the Everfree forest as a strategic checkpoint since we know it's layout better than them. Since we're were talking about pastries here I know dear Pinkie Pie would be the first to volunteer for sure."

"Not bad. Ok prepare yourself because this next one is a doozy!" He said cracking his knuckles. "Hitler himself has just been resurrected by Lex Luther as Mecha-Hitler! He invades Ponyville on the back of a fire breathing T-Rex AND the royal guards are no where to be found! The only thing that can kill him is if you clog his 'Mayor shaped' exhaust port causing him to blow up Death Star style...what do you do!"

This time around the political Earthpony couldn't help but laugh at Jon's outrageous scenario. The audience joined her while Jon deviously tented his fingers, waiting for her answer.

"I'm sorry Jon but...seeing as how I have no idea who or what any of those are I'm afraid I can't tell you what I'd do if that happened." The Mayor said, still laughing.

"And you call yourself Mayor!" Jon yelled, slamming his fists on the table in jest. Jon sat there jokingly shaking his head back and forth while the audience continued laughing along with Mayor Mare. She eventually regained her composure only to wait for the audience to do the same.

"I should probably invite you to future town hall debates," she said, taking a sip of her water. "You certainly would attract a large turnout with hot button issues like those."

"Well call me politically active but I just feel like the good people of Ponyville deserve to know how their leader could handle these kinds of situations." Jon said putting his hands in front of him. "I mean if you can't even handle robo-Hitler I'm not sure I should vote for you."

"Hey now I've handled plenty of disasters in Ponyville," The Mayor interjected slyly. "All of which were very much real I might add."

"Oh this is real! No one ever expects a pastry inquisition but it could happen!" Jon said, vigorously nodding his head. "But no really, uh go ahead. Please share with us some of your experiences; I'm sure someone in your position has seen their fair share of interesting occurrences."

"I have!" The Mayor responded. "Why just recently the town was hit with a crippling milk shortage incident. And to makes things worse it was around the same time Pinkie had her week long chocolate chip cookie sale."

"Wow. That sounds like...a crisis of the highest caliber," Jon said with an expression of fake surprise. "So tell us how did you handle the incident?"

"Well everypony in town wanted milk but it was my responsibility to make sure everypony got a fair amount each," She said. "So I passed a law into effect where each pony could only have a certain amount of milk per day, restricting them to only what was necessary."

"I can't imagine that went over so fell." Jon said.

"I'll admit It wasn't the most popular of laws. We had some ponies who were irate by the fact that I was telling them how much they could have," the Mayor responded. "But by doing this I made sure everypony got the necessary amount of milk needed; No more no less. And within a short period of time the caravans of milk made their way back to Ponyville and all was well."

"So you managed to fix that particular problem for good?" Jon asked.

"Yes I did. And ever since then it hasn't happened again and we've set up backup rations of milk just in case it does." She answered.

"Ok how bout this," Jon continued. "Are there any ongoing problems facing Ponyville at the movement...problems that you haven't--"

"Well it's funny that you mention that," The Mayor answered. "For awhile now we've had this problem of dealing with a pesky cult that's been running around town."

"There's a cult in Ponyville?" Jon asked with a nervous laugh.

"Yes, they worship this thing called 'Smooze,'" she explained, waving her hoof as if do dismiss them. "And they're responsible for all kinds of criminal activities in the area."

"What kind of criminal activities?" He asked.

"Mostly just petty crimes like putting 'kick me' signs on livestock and flushing the toilet while you're still in the shower." The Mayor answered.

"Well then why don't you just arrest them?" Jon asked.

"The problem is we know they're doing these things but we can never catch them in the act," she continued. "Not to mention we have no idea who their leader is or where they operate."

"Maybe I can help," Jon said as he faced the camera with a serious look on his face. "Attention leader of cult Smooze...I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money...because I work on cable TV. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long somewhat successful career. I might find you, and I will kill you...unless you're bigger than me then I'll just have someone else do it."

The crowd laughed while Mayor Mare did her best to not spit out the water she had foolishly tried to drink beforehand.

"There ya go," Jon said. "That should coax him outa hiding."

"Well thank you Jon," She said with an ever present smile. "If by some chance that works I'll make sure you get credited but I should warn...I've been doing this for a long time now and that's not the proper way to handle the situation."

"Oh really! So then tell me 'Mayor,' what is the proper pay?" Jon asked after the crowd died down somewhat. "When you get confronted with these day-to-day problems around town how do you deal with it?

"Well first, I consider all the options that I have, as well as all the resources that are available to me to deal with said problem." She said, making sure to face the camera every now and again. "Then I carefully commit to the idea that's most beneficial to the the people overall as opposed to just one or a few subsets. If I'm ever really stuck I just take a second to think 'WWCD'....'What would Celestia do?' You would not believe how much that helps."

"I think she'd just fly in the air and fix everything with her super magic." Jon said bluntly, causing everyone in attendance to laugh. "I mean, don't take this the wrong way but, she has the power of magic and flight and you're an Earthpony...she's basically your god. Soooo I can't help but feel that you're setting yourself up by unrealistic standards."

As both the audience and guest laughed Jon took the momentary break to reach for the cup of soda from before and take a gulp before starting again.

"So what's new in your life?" Jon said, leaning back in his chair. "We've been talking about what's already happened in your life but I want to know what you're doing nowadays."

The question caused a bright smile to appear on Mayor Mare's face. It was the kind of smile that all politicians get whenever asked that question.

"I'm glad you asked Jon!" She said enthusiastically. "I'm actually campaigning at the moment. I'm up for re-election in a few months."

"Oh how nice." Jon said. "Well I'm sure being on the show will...help you a lot." It was around this time that Jon began to understand things a little more clearly.

"I'm sure it will," she responded. "And while I'm here I think I would like to take this time do address my constituents. David could I please get a close up."

Jon was surprised to find out that she actually knew the name of his camera man. His surprised expression would have been visible to the rest of the world but by then the camera had already focused on Mayor Mare.

"Greetings citizens of Ponyville! It is I your Mayor." She said looking directly at the camera. "As you may know by now it's election season and some of you may not know who to vote for yet, and that's OK. Because I'm here to help guide you."

While She was making her speech Jon was trying his best to get on screen be leaning over the desk and poking his head into the shot.

"I have provided a video that will hopefully answer all your questions," She continued. "Chuck! Roll 2-12!"

"Wait what!?" Jon said, still trying to get in the shot. Before he could say or do anything else the screen faded to black and a video appeared in it's place.

The video opened with Mayor Mare sitting at a desk in what appeared to be her office. Certain points of the video faded to stock footage of herself walking and talking with other ponies.

"Oh Hello, I didn't see you there. You know a lot of things have been said leading up to this election; some true and others false. Well, as Mayor it is my duty to set things straight for those of you who are confused.

My opponent Berry Punch would like to have you believe that I've been in office too long and that a change in power in necessary. But you know what I say? I say why fix what isn't broken. Under my leadership Ponyville as seen a huge growth in its economy as well as lowered taxes in just the last year!

What has Berry Punch done in the last year? Oh nothing except getting charged with a DUI!

So please vote for me, Mayor Mare! Because under my administration I promise to make Ponyville the Envy of all Equestria!

Do you really want this to be the face of Ponyville!?... I know I don't."
Paid for by the friends and family of "Four more years of Mayor Mare"

The video faded away to a shot of both Jon and Mayor Mare at their desk being applauded by the audience. Mayor Mare, realizing this, waved at the audience while Jon sat in his chair eating out of a bag of popcorn and wearing 3D glasses.

"Wow. Sounds like...sounds like this Berry Punch is in for one hell of a ride." He said, taking of the glasses and putting away his popcorn. "Now I know why you wanted to come on the show."

"Oh Jon I assure this was all very last minute." The Mayor said, avoiding eye contact by waving at the audience. Even though he felt like he was being used Jon admired his guest's sense of moxy. Though at the same time he felt that she wasn't leaving without a coming under fire just a little bit.

"So you're up for re-election. That's great!" Jon said. "Now obviously you've done a lot of good for Ponyville but in the video you claim that a lot of things things have been said by both parties. Some true and others false. So riddle me this...what is your opponent saying about you that is true?"

For the first time Mayor Mare was caught off guard by a question. So much so that she inadvertently answered with the truth.

"Oh we...she's running on a platform called "Protect Ponyville," the Mayor said rubbing the back of her head. "She's claiming that under my leadership we're defenseless from outside attacks."

"Why does she think that?" Jon asked. "Has Ponyville been invaded before?"

"...You could say that." She said with a guilty smile. "Anyway aren't we overdue for a commercial break?"

"Not even close!" Jon said shaking his head. "Please...enlighten us about these attacks."

With a quick sigh Mayor Mare put her hoof up to her chin to try and recollect.

"Well...one that comes to mind is the Parasprite incident that happened awhile back," she said. "They're a type of bug that can multiply quickly and we had to get rid of them since they were eating all our food."

"Well that's not so bad," Jon said. "I mean every town has some kind of pest prob--"

"And of course not too long ago Cerberus escaped from his cage in the underworld, and was running amoke in our town," she continued. "And that wasn't even the fist time an animal was loose in Ponyville. Before that we had a giant cosmic bear appear in the town square."

"O-oh I see," Jon said in astonishment. "Well I mean I don't think one could hardly classify animals finding their way in your town an invasion I mean it's not like--

"And then there was the time Nightmare Moon invaded Ponvyille and kidnapped the Princess Celestia," the Mayor interrupted. "Or the time the God of Chaos broke free from his prison and for awhile took over the town."

Jon listened in disbelief at the several accounts that she continued to list, all the while rethinking his next visit.

"You know how before you said you don't have a military," Jon asked, not even waiting for her to respond. "Well I think it's time you invested in a motherfucking military!"

"I've...already made a note to address that during a future debate." She responded looking as guilty as ever.

"Quick question though regarding all those incidents," Jon said, pausing for emphasis. "I mean who-- how did you respond to them individually?"

"Well I did my best to handle each situation," she responded. "But if you're asking who eventually got ride of the invaders it was either one of the members of 'The Elements of Harmony' or in some cases all six of them."

"Ah I've heard of them," Jon responded. "Matter of fact you mentioned them earlier on in this interview as well."

"Well when it comes to both the safety of our town and Equestria they really are some of my-- our best resources." She said with a smile. "You should invite another one of them on your show."

"You know what? That's not a bad idea." Jon said as he scooted closer to his guest. "Listen we're out of time but thank you for being here today, you were a wonderful guest and I wish the best of luck to you in your upcoming election."

"Thank you Jon!" The Mayor replied. "I had a great time today."

"Mayor Mare everyone! We'll be right back!" Jon said as the electrified crowd stood to applaud.

The last scene shown to the public is Jon whispering something in Mayor Mare's ear. The Mayor seized the moment of up close intimacy by pinning a "Vote for Mayor Mare" button on his lapel. The camera slowly paned away from Jon pointing to his newly acquired button and talking to the Mayor who responded by offering him more of them. Eventually the camera made its way to the upper right corner of the stuido where the show's logo reappears and faded to black then to another commercial.

Episode 8 [Twlight Sparkle]: The idea

As the sun rose over the skyline of Manhattan the sound of Jon's alarm turning on awoke him from his deep sleep.

"...for it is written in the book of 2nd Samuel: 'His way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who--'"

Jon slammed on snooze button ending the pastor's sermon. Instead of an old fashion alarm clock Jon's morning wakeup call was provided by a radio set to a Catholic broadcast station, because (as he would tell anyone who asked) nothing wakes you up in the morning like an old man yelling at you that you're going to hell.

Jon was on the fourth day of his week long vacation. Comedy Central had given him another break since he first started "Equestrian Interviews," only now he was using the time away from the office to spend time with his family. But as his little vacation was quickly coming to a close he started to realize that he needed a new guest for the return show...and since it would be the first show since the break he wanted that guest to be special. To be Equestrian.

Jon slowly made his way down the stairs to the living room, each step bringing with it a creaking sound as if the house was trying to communicate with him. He eventually found his way to the kitchen where his children we're already eating and his wife, Tracey McShane, had just finished putting the final touches on his breakfast. Scrambled eggs, toast, and waffles.

"Hey kids," He said to the children at the table who didn't say anything back as their mouths were full. He followed the smell of food and quickly made his way to Tracey, giving her a hug from behind.

"Mmmm looks good!" Jon said, noticing that his breakfast was slightly different than his kid's. "Oh what, I don't get any bacon?"

"Not after your last trip to the doctor," she said, waving a spatula in his face. "Lower your cholesterol and then we'll talk, mister. Also you just get egg whites." The two kids present snickered in the corner at the sight of their father being scolded.

"Daddies in trouble!" One of them gleefully said as Jon took his plate of food.

After a quick peck on cheek he joined his kids Nathan and Maggie who were almost finished with their breakfast. Jon began to feast on the meal laid out in front of him but not even his wife's good cooking could take his mind off of work.

It was still somewhat early to be thinking about his next guest appearance but for Jon it was hard not to as he usually had some ideas floating around in his head. One of which was to invite a member of "The Elements of Harmony" on the program again. The last time he did was so with Applejack and as he recalled the ratings that time around were some of the highest. But that was just one idea out of many.

But even before all the Jon still wanted to do his homework on who each individual pony was instead of his usual routine of blindly picking a guest and hoping they'll turn out to be good. Jon continued to ponder what his next move would be but it didn't last long as his train of thought was derailed by the sounds of his own daughter trying to get his attention.

"Daddy, daddy, daddy?" Maggie said. "Can I ask you a question?" Jon always found it amusing that his daughter always warned him of an impending question with another question.

"Sure thing, sweety," He said leaning sideways to whisper in her direction. "Only if you give me some of your bacon." She happily obliged and Jon quickly hid the succulent strip of meat under his eggs before Tracey noticed.

"Alright, go ahead." Jon said, leaning over once more. "Oh and don't tell mommy."

"OK!...Daddy, when's our next vacation?" She said looking up at him with her big eyes. Jon took a quick second to think about it.

"Probably sometime this winter." He replied. "Why do you ask?" Maggie sat up in her chair as if to make sure Jon could hear her.

"Cause me and Nathan want to go to the pony place like you do!" She exclaimed.

Jon and his wife shot each other a quick look of worry; this was actually something they had discussed before. Although they both made sure their kids would never saw the show (even before "Equestrian Interviews") word of mystical pastel colored creatures still managed to reach their ears where it was amplified by their imaginations.

Both parents had agreed that the world known as Equestria was too dangerous for their children. Not only that but their ruler Princess Celestia had made it clear that Jon was the only one allowed there.

Trying to avoid the question Jon took Maggie's fork, scooped up some eggs and placed it in her mouth in an attempt to keep her quite. This proved largely fruitless as she simply just tagged in her adjacent brother.

"Yeah daddy!" Nathan yelled. "We want to see the horsies!" Jon himself now took a bite of his eggs, not because he was trying to avoid talking but because he was starving.

"Why do you want to see a bunch of old horses anyway"" Jon said, wondering if Celestia could hear him. "Trust me your not missing much...wouldn't much rather go to Hawaii again?" Both kids shook their head.

"But I heard that some of them are magic!" Nathan exclaimed.

"Yeah magic!" Maggie said, backing up her brother. "We want to see magic and horsies!" Jon knew that the two of them wouldn't let this go easy so he tried to his best to compromise.

"How bout this," Jon bartered. "How bout we go to Vegas again, see a magic show then go to a petting zoo that has ponies? That'd be the same right?"

Both children once again shook their heads in disagreement.

"Well trust me kids," He said putting on his best poker face. "As someone who's been to their place before take my word for it when I say it's not that impressive." Jon knew that if their kids even saw the tiniest glimpse of Equestria they would never want to leave.

"But Daaaaad!" Nathan protested, "Mommy won’t let us watch your show so we never get to see the talking horsies!"

"That's right!" Maggie added, "We'll never get to really see them unless we go to the pony place."

Jon was about to respond but before he could something clicked in his head. Suddenly he had an idea and all at once he knew exactly what he had to do next. He needed to make a phone call.

"Uh, listen sweety," He said in haste. "I'm sorry but I'm afraid you two can't go there but I'll set something up so you'll get to meet one. Deal?"

"Deal!" Maggie and Nathan said in unison. At the time Jon was just saying the first thing he could think of to get them to stop their questions, had had no idea his hollow proposal would one day come true.

Tracey shot a look at her husband who was already making his way to her side. The two had a quick conversation just out of earshot of their kids. Something Maggie had said gave birth to an idea in Jon's brain but first he had to clear it with his wife who was momentary stunned by his proposal. But eventually she agreed.

After getting the green light Jon gave her a kiss, picked up his plate of food and made his way back up the stairs to his study, but not after his wife snatched his lone bacon strip off his plate.

Jon placed his half eaten breakfast on his desk and began to dial the number of his royal friend, the idea still fresh in his mind.

"Hello Jon," Celestia said. "How are you enjoying your vacation?"

"It's alright," Jon answered as he sat down behind his desk. "How are you enjoying ruling over an entire nation with an iron hoof?"

"It's alright," Celestia answered trying her best to match Jon's tone. "What can I do for you today?"

"Well I still have a few days left till I get back to work," he said. "And I plan on using those days to learn as much as I can about your world and those who inhabit it. You know that way in the future I'll be more prepared during interviews and--"

"And you'll have a better idea of who you'll want on your show." Celestia interjected.

"Exactly!" Jon responded. "And that's where you come in."

"Yes of course," she said. "What new information would you like for me to impart on you this time?"

"You know, as much as I love our little one-on-ones that's not how I plan on researching your world this time around." Jon said, scooping a fork full of eggs in his mouth.

"Is that so?" Celestia asked. "Well then what did you have in mind?"

"Well...this is what I'm proposing. I'm not due to go back on the air for a few more days, right?" Jon said, swallowing the last of his breakfast. "Well with your permission I would like to spend the rest of those days in Equestria. Sort of like a...mini-vacation."

"Most interesting; not that I'm against this idea what why do you want to stay here all of a sudden?" she responded. "Up until now you seemed perfectly content with learning about our world through me and only visiting only when you needed to speak with somepony."

"Well like I said before, I want to use the time I have left to learn more about your world," he responded. "I just feel that the best way to do so is to immerse myself in your culture. By doing that I think I'll have a better understanding and appreciation for your people."

Celestia found herself once again impressed by Jon's respectful nature; her admiration for him was well founded.

"My, my, my Jon," she said. "It sounds as though you speak from experience."

Celestia was right; this idea was not entirety foreign to him. Not too long ago Jon had the honor of going to Afghanistan to entertain the troops. Hearing about their struggles over the news was one thing but to see it up close gave him an even greater respect for what they were doing...it was a trip that changed his life and how he viewed the world.

"You could say that." Jon responded. "There is still so much about Equestria that I do not understand and if I'm going to continue interviewing its people then I feel it's only proper that I meet them half way."

"Well said Jon," Celestia said with pride. "I'll make it happen! When will you like to join us?"

"Tomorrow morning if possible." Jon said. "I want to spend the rest of the day packing. Also if you set me up in a hotel can you make sure it has a mini-bar?" He made sure to make his request with a thick layer of sarcasm so she knew he was joking.

"I"ll see what I can do; don't worry I'll take care of everything." She said, pausing slightly before speaking again. "We'll have to do it early so we can get you through customs as quickly as possible."

Jon was about to take a bit out of his piece of toast but stopped dead in his tracks.

"C-customs?" Jon pondered out loud.

"Oh my yes Jon," Celestia responded. "We'll have to process you to make sure you're safe to enter our world."

"But I-- But I never had to go through customs before." Jon argued, the sounds of unease present in his voice.

"That was different because you were only staying for very short period of time," Celestia continued. "But since you'll be wanting to stay for a longer duration we'll have to make sure you're not dangerous. That means body scans, cavity searches, and you'll have to get an Equestrian passport."

"O-oh well if that's what it takes to get in then I'll be...happy to cooperate." Jon said, hoping that unicorns weren't the ones who conducted the cavity searches.

There was a dainty laugh on the other end of the phone before Celestia spoke again.

"Oh Jon I was only jesting," she said. "Don't worry about a thing I'll make sure you are properly accommodated...though it's nice to know how far you're willing to go"

Jon laughed along with Celestia, wondering if his fallacious attitude was rubbing off on her.

Later that night Jon slept in his bed next to his wife, his prepared luggage standing by to the door ready to go. As he snored the night away he dreamt of what was to come completely unaware of the magic that was already starting to take place.

Episode 8 [Twlight Sparkle]: Jon goes on vacation

The day of Jon's visit back to Equestria had finally arrived and for the first time he was staying not because he needed to track someone down but simply to absorb the surroundings and broaden his horizon. The experience was going to be different than what he was used to; the immediacy of the situation would be upon sooner than he thought.

The sound of Jon's alarm began to slowly pull him out of his deep sleep. The day had barely started and yet it took him only a few seconds to realize that something was not right. The quilt that that he usually slept under felt somehow different, the warm feel of his wife in his arms was replaced by nothingness and the usual sound of his radio alarm was now the sound of a rooster screaming in the distance.

As if someone had sent an electrical shock through his spine Jon immediately sat up in his bed. His brain was still shaking off the last remnants of whatever he was dreaming about so the surroundings took a bit longer to register with him. But once it did Jon entertained the thought that he might still be dreaming or that he was kidnapped

"Where the hell am I?" Jon thought as he scanned the room looking for clues.

Wherever he was it wasn't his bedroom and it sure as hell wasn't any place he had ever seen before. His surroundings consisted of the bed he slept in, a nightstand, a desk located a few feet to this left separated by a window, and a wooden cabinet in the corner of the room. The walls were painted blue with matching light blue stripes and were adorned with pictures and light fixtures.

It was simple yet efficient; if he had been kidnapped then at least whoever did it so was accommodating. After a minute of further deliberation Jon began to notice a few key characteristics about his new setting.

The room wasn't just blue they were a very vibrant blue, the pictures on hanging from the walls were all whimsical paintings, and the light source that surrounded him weren't light bulbs but gas lamps. The atmosphere just screamed "other worldly."

"Am I in Equestria?" Jon thought getting up from his bed.

Immediately he turned his attention to the window in between the bed and desk and in one fell swoop opened the shutters to the outside world. It took a second for his vision to adjust to the sudden burst of light but once he did he realized that his hypothesis was confirmed.

Jon was now looking down at the busy streets of Ponyville's shopping district where a few bustling ponies could be seen haggling and buying various goods and services. From this height no one could see him so he took this moment to admire the view, which in its own right was quite serene.

After a moment of blissful silence that he rarely received in New York Jon closed the window and returned to his bed to straighten his sheets and adjust his pillow. He was obviously a guest in someone's household and as such felt it necessary to tidy up his living quarters.

As he put the finishing touches on his now tidy bed Jon noticed that there was a note on his nightstand held down by his own reading glasses. He took his glasses in one hand and the note in the other and began to read the familiar handwriting:

"Son of a bitch." Jon thought to himself. "This is a hotel...and I made my bed for nothing."

As slightly uncomfortable as he was by the thought of him being whisked off in the middle of the night without his permission Jon had to admit that the luxury of full room and board and having been spared the task of unpacking his own luggage more than made up for it.

With Jon now brought up to speed he put both the note and his glasses back on the nightstand and threw his arms out to stretch his muscles cracking some joints in the process. He continued his morning tradition by moving his head in a circular motion to stretch his neck, producing similar results. With his mind and body now at ease he was ready to start the day.

But before he could continue Jon's attention was now drawn to the door; he could hear muffled voices coming from behind it. It was definitely the sound of two people talking amongst themselves but they were too close to the door to be just passing by.

Jon stealthily approached the door to investigate. Lacking a peep hole his only option was the more traditional route of simply opening the door. He opted to do so but not before putting his ear against its wooden frame to do a little eavesdropping.

"...not doing it you do it." A male voice whispered.

"No way! What if he's dangerous?" A female voice retorted.

"Look the princess brought him here so it should be nice." The male voice shot back.

"Then why don't you do it?" The female voice asked. Slowly grasping the doorknob Jon took a step back and in one swinging motion opened the door as quickly as he could, freighting the two loitering individuals.

Just as Jon suspected they were both ponies: One a male Earthpony and the other a female Unicorn. The Earthpony was light brown with a tan colored mane and he wore a red hat while the Unicorn was pink with a bright yellow mane and was wearing an apron. Jon had been to enough gigs in his life to recognize hotel employees a mile away.

"Hi" Jon blurted, smiling at the two ponies. He paused to give them time to speak but none of them did. "Liiisten who do I talk to about a wakeup call?"

After a slightly uncomfortable pause the brown Earthpony (who was the receptionist) raised his hoof so slowly that Jon had time to give of a small yawn.

"Ah good," Jon said, trying his best to sound friendly. "Listen could you please set me up for 6:30 every morning?" The receptionist didn't say a word; he simply just nodded his head.

"Alright thank you!" Jon said patting Earthpony on the shoulder. Jon closed the door and was about to make his way to the dresser when a thought crossed his mind. Scratching his chin he turned his attention to the door again and swung it open in the same fashion as before. The two employees we're still there.

"One more thing," He said. "Where can a guy get a bagel around here?" His sudden reappearance caused the Earthpony to fall over in surprise leaving only the pink and lemon unicorn to answer.

"Su...Sugarcube Corner." She said.

"Thanks again." Jon said, once again retreating to his room. Having no questions left Jon made his way to the dresser to get changed. When he opened it he was greeted by nearly every suit he owned neatly arranged by color along with their respective slacks. On the left door of the dresser were his ties; while on the right was a mirror. The bottom of the dresser had Jon's dress shoes which looked like they were recently shined.

"Yeah I don't think so." Jon said as he stuck both his hands in between the wall of suits, pushing them aside to see what else was available. Eventually Jon found what he was looking for: his grey William and Mary T-shirt (Jon's old college), black leather jacket, a pair of beige khakis, NY baseball cap, and his old running shoes.

At the risk of wasting more time being by himself Jon left his room and into a hallway. His two pony friends where no longer blocking his way, in fact the entire area was deserted. After taking a hard left down the hallway he soon found his way to a set of stairs. He descended them quickly and was now in the hotel's main lobby, now Jon realized why no one was upstairs.

Ahead of him was the exit to the hotel where a rack of pamphlets could be seen. To his left was a rustic looking dining hall where several ponies were enjoying their continental breakfast and to his right was the receptionist's desk. His plan was to simply walk straight ahead and exit the building without being noticed but doing so proved impossible

As Jon made his way for the exit the sounds of ponies in mid-conversion came to a halt as did the clanging of their silverware. Jon was halfway to the door when he noticed the now dead silence and looked over his shoulder at the room filled with awestruck ponies staring at him. For all of them this was the first time seeing a human in person.

Matching their silence Jon continued in his path to the door, opening it ever so slightly. He could still feel rows the ponies leering at him from behind, some of whom actually got out of their seats to get a better look. As understanding as Jon was at their curiosity he couldn't help but have a little fun with them. So to that end he spun around quickly and lightly jolted forward at them.

"BOO!" He said, causing everyone to recoil at once and a few to fall over in their seat.

After giving a friendly wave goodbye he took a local map off the nearby rack and exited the building into the streets of Ponyville. Although his new location was very much different from this last in terms of settings the reactions he got from the masses was very much the same.

Jon strolled down a random dirt road enjoying the fresh air and sun trying his best not to stick out, though this proved to be impossible. The regular clothing he wore was standard attire for whenever he was on vacation and/or out of the house and didn't want to be noticed.

As famous as he was back home he rarely got noticed on the streets of Manhattan; especially when we wasn't in a suit or wearing professional on screen makeup. Only those with a true keen eye would spot him in his shabby disguise but that was New York...it didn't matter what he wore on the streets of Ponyville, either way he stood out like a sore pink thumb.

He continued to walk down his current path occasionally playing on his phone or looking at his map for reference. All eyes were on him and he knew it. Jon may have been well known but he wasn't used to this much attention outside his show. Little did he realize that rumors of his visit were already fast traveling through the region.

Looking up from his map he began to scan the many ponies who were doing the same to him. Some were trying to avoid staring but it was very obvious where their attention was. One colt in particular was in the middle of painting the side of a house but was so distracted by Jon's presence that he accidentally starting painting the windows instead, much to a older unicorns dismay.

Jon wanted to try something so he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of sunglasses. Looking in all directions Jon was secretly looking at the cutie marks of random ponies to see if he could properly guess what they meant.

He saw some that looked pretty straight forward like: A log being cut in half by a saw, or a book being written on by a quill.

Others however Jon found were to abstract to guess on visuals alone like: A piece of metal bent in the shape of a heart, or a lightning bolt that was twisted into a circular motion.

After a good while of staring at pony flanks Jon realized he was hungry as indicated by his stomach gurgling in protest. Even with the map Jon was still unsure of where this "Sugarcube Corner" was. It had been quite some time since he'd felt like such a tourist.

Lacking even the general knowledge of where he was Jon got the attention of the pony nearest to him, a pink Earthpony with green hair and a daisy as a cutie mark.

"Excuse me?" Jon said. "Could you point me in the direction of 'Sugarcube Corner?'"

"Uh...sure thing," she said, pointing to Jon's left. "It's...r-right around the corner."

"Thanks." Jon said handing her a business card much to her confusion. "If you're ever in New York."

His stomach grumbled in anticipation and after a quick wave goodbye Jon was once again on his way.

Episode 8 [Twlight Sparkle]: Jon goes on vacation part 2

In no time Jon rounded the corner and found himself just outside what looked like a bakery. He entered the somewhat busy establishment to find all manner of ponies sitting an enjoying various confectionery treats. This must be the place.

Jon approached the counter where two Earthponies who were too busy spreading frosting on a cake and heaping a costumer respectively, to notice Jon. The Earthpony handling the register was a tall lanky yellow colt with an orange mane while the other pony working on the cake was a shorter light blue mare with a rose colored mane.

It was now Jon's turn to step up to the register. As he approached the Earthpony the intoxicating aroma of pastries filled his senses. This was definitely a bakery.

"Welcome to 'Sugercube corner!'" The cashier said, slowly looking upwards at Jon. "How can I...help...you...today?" Jon leaned in to both look at the selection of treats and to read the cashier's name tag which read 'Mr. Carrot Cake.'

"Yeah, do you guys have any bagels?" Jon asked.

"Uh...well...yes of course we do." Said Mr. Cake who turned to call out to his wife. "Uh honey could you get a bagel for...uh for..."

"Call me 'Jon.'" He interjected. An unaware Mrs. Cake was already emerging from the backroom carrying with her the bagel that her husband had requested.

"Jon huh?" She said, her attention on the bagel to make sure she didn't drop it. "That's a very unique name. Tell me are you from around..."

Mrs. Cake stopped mid sentence at the sight of the Jon towering figure looking down at her, at lost for words all she could do was stare. With no one making a move Jon reached forward and grabbed his treat.

"Don't worry I get that a lot," he said with a wink while pulling out his wallet. "So how much do I owe ya?"

"Uh...two bits" Said Mr. Cake.

Jon was somewhat taken aback; he had no idea was a "bit" was. He wondered if he could get away with paying with a dollar bill or two or if there was even an exchange rate between US and Equestrian currency. When he opened his wallet he noticed that if felt somewhat heavier than usual. Upon further inspection the bills that he had withdrawn the day before were gone and replaced with gold coins.

"Celestia how do you do it?" Jon thought, taking out two gold coins. He placed them on the counter and after getting a nod of approval made his way to the door.

The still awestruck Mrs. Cake was jolted from her daze by the sound of crying coming from another room. With a quick dash she ran up upstairs.

"Toddlers?" Jon called out, looking at Mr. Cake.

"Uh yeah," he responded with a nervous laugh as he rubbed his head. "Twins…only a few months old."

"Ah...I've been there." Jon said with a nod. "Trust me it gets better."

Jon opened the door back to Ponyville while at the same time taking a bite out of his newly acquired bagel.

"Hmmm...not bad," he said, taking a step outside and closing the door. "New York's is better."

As Jon walked in no particular direction he thought that perhaps a mom and pop style bakery owners would be interesting characters to have on his show. If they were any good at being interviewed as they were at making food they would do just fine.

Jon now found himself on a new street with new ponies but getting the same treatment as before. Endless faces starting at him. But he didn't care, he was too busy enjoying the fresh air and his treat.

It was so quiet that Jon could hear the sound of someone trotting behind him, but he gave it no mind. Though in time the sound got louder and louder and the attention of the ponies around him shifted from Jon to whatever it was making the noise. The sound grew in volume as if it was getting closer; now Jon was curious. He turned around to see what it was but it was too late. All he saw was a flash of green before tumbling to the ground.

With the sun now in his eyes Jon had a hard time seeing what was going on. All he knew was he was flat on his back and something was standing on top of him. As his vision slowly adjusted to the sun beating down on him he could see clearly now what had mounted him with a look on her face as she'd just found the Holy Grail. It was a mint colored Unicorn, her mane a pale cyan with streaks of white. She stared at Jon with eyes filled with wonder and her horn was uncomfortably close to his face.

"HEY!" She yelled. "You're the human everyponies talking about! Can you understand me?!"

Jon tried to respond back but couldn't as a chunk of bagel that he had previously tried to swallow was lodged in his throat. Noticing this, the Unicorn's large smile gave way to a look of dread.

"Oh no!" She exclaimed. "Don't worry I'll help ya!" With that the young mare began to violently jump up and down on Jon's stomach. The first three jumps yielded no results but after the fourth jump the half eaten glob of food ejected itself from Jon's windpipe. Jon gasped for air though it was still hard to breath with the Unicorn still standing on top of him.

"There we go!" Jon's attacker announced. "Can you breathe?" Jon didn't answer but instead continued to lay on the ground with his eyes shut, trying to focus on his breathing. The Unicorn however took this as meaning that he was unconscious so she raised her hoof in the air to smack him across the face, in an effort to wake him up.

Before she could strike however the mint colored Unicorn was grabbed from behind by a cream colored Earthpony with a blue and pink streaked mane.

"Lyra get off of him!" The nazely Earthpony screamed. "What in the name of Celestia do you think you're doing?!"

"Oh there you are Bon Bon!" Lyra said. "I was just helping out my new friend the human!"

"Helping? It looked like you were attacking him!" Bon Bon scolded. She turned her attention to Jon, extending her hoof to try and help him up.

"I am so sorry!" She said. "Please forgive my friend she can be...very enthusiastic. Are you ok?"

"Oh you worry too much," Lyra said. "He's fine. Right Mr. Human?" Jon grabbed Bon Bon hoof and slowly lifted himself up.

"I have a name you know," he said, standing up. "It's Jo-AAAAAAAAAAAAHN" Jon lurched forward in pain. Lyra's tackle had done more than cause him to joke on his bagel it also threw out his back.

"See! Look what you did!" Bon Bon yelled, jabbing Lyra with her hoof. "You injured him!"

"W-wait I can fix this!" A guilty looking Lyra said. She galloped behind Jon and pointed her now glowing horn at Jon's lower back. Although Jon couldn't see what was going on he was still nervous at the prospect of this Unicorn 'helping' him again. He could have ran away but the pain prevented him from doing much of anything.

"Wait, wait, wait!" He urged. "I'm fine really you don't have to--"

Before Jon could even contemplate what was happening his lower back jerked forward with a crack. Jon was now standing straight up with a look of discomfort plastered all over his face. Lyra then used her magic to expand and contract the muscles in his back which felt surprisingly pleasant.

The sudden sensation of pain followed by pleasure caused Jon to fall forward again.

"You killed him!" Bon Bon yelled.

"But!...but I didn't mean to!" Lyra cried. "Does anypony have a shovel?!"

"Wait! I'm fine!" Jon exclaimed as he slowly stood up.

"You're alive!" Lyra exclaimed, running around to get a better view of him. "Feeling better?"

"Actually...yeah a lot better really. " Jon said, swiveling around in place to see if the pain was truly gone. "Usually something like that would cost me hundreds of dollars so thanks...I guess."

Jon wanted to ask if her services came with a happy ending but decided not too as things were already weird enough.

"You’re welcome!" Lyra said looking over at Bon Bon who was glaring at her. "Oh..and sorry for hurting you."

"Eh it's ok, I've experienced worse." He said. "If I can survive Applejack kicking me in the stomach I can handle you."

Both Lyra and Bon Bon gave each other a look.

"Wait, what did you say?" Bon Bon asked. "Applejack kicked you?"

"Yeah she did," Jon answered. "Not too long ago when I surprised her on her farm."

"I knew you looked familiar!" Lyra exclaimed. "You're the host of 'The Daily Show.'"

"Yes I am. Jon Stewart at your service." He said, with a forced smile. With his back now in better condition he leaned forward to shake both their hooves. Lyra for some reason took longer to let go and was staring at Jon's hand the entire time.

"Oh wow, I love your show! " Bon Bon added. "Oh sorry I'm Bon Bon and this is Lyra. What are you doing here in Ponyville? Are you heading somewhere?"

"I'm on vacation." Jon said, rubbing the back of his head. "As for where I was going I don't quite remember."

"See what you did!?" Bon Bon scolded at Lyra. "You gave him amnesia!"

"Did not!" Lyra shot back. "He probably just forgot cause he's real old!" Bon Bon hesitantly shoved a hoof in Lyra's mouth and the other around her neck. She looked at Jon with a sorry expression.

"She didn't mean it!" Bon Bon said. "Please if you need help getting around town I'm sure I can help."

"She sure can!" Lyra said with a smirk, as she managed to momentary brake free. "This one’s really knows how to 'get around town' if you know what I mean."

"HUSH YOU!" Bon Bon demanded as she wrapped both her hooves over Lyra's mouth.

Jon watched as Bon Bon continued to muzzle her friend while Lyra tried using her magic to break free. Seeing her horn light up with magic once more gave Jon an idea.

"Actually maybe you can help me," Jon said, now having both ponies full attention. "I'm doing some research on this place and I'm wondering if you could point me to the nearest library."

"Sure I can," Bon Bon said, pointing at a building behind Jon. "You'll find lots of useful source material over there!"

"Thank you. I'd love to stay and chat but I gotta go." Jon said, lightly jogging towards his new location. Lyra finally broke free from Bon Bon's grasp and tried to follow him though Bon Bon wouldn't allow it. So instead she decided to ask one final question.

"Hey Mr. Stewart!" She called out. "Why you doing research on us anyway?" Jon stopped for a second to call back to her.

"Cause I'm planning on invading your world and keeping you all as my slaves!" Jon yelled back and was once again on his way. Lyra put her hoof over her mouth to hold back her laughter while Bon Bon had a look of worry on her face.

With his new destination clear in sight Jon took a second to admire its architectural design. It was a two story building that was partially built inside a tree. It was certainly different than anything he'd seen thus far. Jon found that the door was unlocked so he let himself in.

To Jon it looked like more of a house than anything else thought there were plenty of books around for anyone to justify calling it a library.

"Hello?" Jon called out. "Anyone here?" With no answer Jon gave a shrug and walked over to one of the many book shelves. He began to browse row after row till he found something that jumped out at him.

Between Celestia teleporting him here without him knowing and Lyra fixing his back Jon's interest in pony magic was at an all time high. So much so that he was thinking about inviting a Unicorn on the show next. He had gotten a taste magic that day and he wanted more; before doing so however he decided to do a little research first. Eventually he found a book that looked promising. When Jon read the introduction he learned it was about Unicorn spells. The book was called "Advance spells and Enchantments" and was written by someone called Starswirl the Bearded. Jon decided to peruse through it a bit before going to another book.

A few minutes had passed and already Jon had learned a lot of Unicorn culture. Some of the spells he read about ranged from everyday uses to expert level incantations. Along with spells the book also provided some chapters on Unicorn history, this was exactly what he needed.

Jon wanted to ask someone if he could check it out but there was still no one to be found. Jon now desperate walked up stairs to see if the librarian was present in another room. The results of Jon's exploration was not the librarian but a familiar face sleeping in a bed. It was none other than the first Equestrian citizen Jon had ever had as a guest on his show.

"Spike?" Jon called out to the sleeping dragon. "Is that you?"

"Huh, who's there?" Spike said as he slowly got up from his bed. Before Jon could answer Spike leaped from his bed and in a panic fell over the side of the walkway and landed on lower level. Jon scrambled back down the stairs to see if he was alright.

"Oh geez I didn't mean to scare you!" Jon said. "Are you ok?" Spike sat up and after a brief moment of dizziness started to run around the lobby picking up books that were in messy little piles on the floor and climbed up different ladders to reshelf them.

"Please don't tell Twilight I was asleep!" Spike begged. "I was suppose to clean up the place but I was real tired so I--" Suddenly spike stopped in his tracks and dropped the books he had collected.

"Is that you, Jon?" Spike said peering down from atop a ladder.

"Do you know any other humans?" Jon asked with a smile.

"JON!" Spike yelled as he slid down the ladder and ran up to give him a hug. "It's great to see you again!"

"Same here little man." Jon responded, ruffling the scales on his head.

"What are you doing here?" Spike asked, offering Jon a seat.

"I'm on vacation." Jon said sitting down. "As for why I'm here in this library its cause I'm doing some research on Unicorns. You don't live here do you?"

"I sure do," Spike responded looking at the book of spells he had in his hand. "Unicorns huh? Is this for your show?"

"You could say that," Jon said. "I've never interviewed a Unicorn before and I'm just now starting to learn about their magic. It's really quite fascinating."

"Oh I see," Spike said. "Well if its magic you’re interested in you should talk to Twilight."

"Twilight?" Jon said, caressing his chin. "Oh yeah Twilight. She's your...guardian isn't she?"

"Yeah she's the best magic user in all of Equestria!" Spike exclaimed. "I mean she is Princess Celestia's Pro..uh her Pro..ta shay?"

"Really?" Jon asked as the gears in his head stared to turn. "So she's good with magic huh?"

"Oh the best!" Spike answered. "In fact she once--" Just then the door to the library swung open startling both Jon and Spike.

"Spike I'm home!" A voiced called out. What followed was the appearance of a lone lavender Unicorn. Her mane was an even darker shade of purple livened up with a pink and magenta streak. Her head was in a book but upon seeing the mess she had left still present gave a sigh and lowered her head in disappointment.

"Oh Spike I thought I told you to...Oh! I didn't realize we had company." She said looking at Jon. Her attention quickly went back to the scattered piles of books and blushed slightly as she continued to address Spike.

"See Spike this is why we need to keep this place nice and tidy," She scolded. "I'm sorry sir but we--" It was at that moment that Twilight realized that her guest was a human. She stopped to a moment to look at Jon, admiring his presence.

"Say...don't I know you from somewhere?" She asked, squinting her eyes.

Spiked leaped forward, relieved that her attention was now on Jon rather than him.

"Don't you remember my trip to New York?" He said. "This is--"

"Stewart!" Jon said, getting up to shake her hoof. "Jon Stewart. It's a pleasure to finally meet the famous Twilight Sparkle."

"Wait, you're the Jon Stewart?" Twilight asked in surprise. "Wait you...you know who I am?" The gravity of the situation was starting to set in for her.

"Well your reputations precedes you." Jon continued. "Listen this may be very sudden but tell me...what are you doing Monday night?"

Episode 8 [Twlight Sparkle]: Please welcome to the show Twlight Sparkle

Series: Equestrian interviews
Interviewer: Jon Stewart
Guest: Twilight Sparkle (Twilight)
Date: ???
Location: Daily Show headquarters
733 11th Avenue Manhattan, NY 10019

Having found a guest a few days ahead of schedule Jon had the opportunity to come back to the studio early in preparation for his upcoming show. Twilight was kind enough to teleport Jon back to New York herself the day he asked her to appear and since then he had his interns rearrange the set for the occasion.

This was the first time since Applejack that Jon had a member of the Mane 6 on his show and like with AJ Jon felt that the set and atmosphere should reflect the guest's personality. So to that end Twilight would receive her own song and the backdrop to the set depicted a wizard casting a spell in a manner that looked like it had been designed by artists for a Harry Potter film.

Some of the final touches to the set included bookshelves stocked with encyclopedias, torches on the walls, and most of Jon's staff dressed in robes (though that was merely done for the entertainment of audience.) But one of the most notable changes was Jon desk which was replaced by what looked like a pile of books stacked in the shape of his a desk. In reality however it was just his usual desk with an outer shell which depicted stacked books.

The crowd cheered as Daily Show officials gave the signal that was last commercial break was over. The camera did a longer and wider pan around the stage to show off its temporary new design before eventually zooming in on Jon who was sitting at his chair waving at the audience with excitement.

"Hey, welcome back to 'The Daily Show' we have a very special guest tonight! I know you've been waiting for this one!" Jon said, rubbing his hands together. "She is the leader of the 'Elements of Harmony,' and the protégé of Princess Celestia herself. Please welcome to the show Twilight Sparkle!"

The crowd roared with a level of excitement that was slightly higher than normal because they knew exactly who was on the docket this time around.

In the past Jon had always gotten his guest at the very last minute but since he managed to find Twilight a few days early he was able, for the first time, advertise an Equestrian citizen's appearance. This meant that people from both worlds knew who was coming in advanced instead of just a vague idea.

The screams of excitement only intensified once Twilight finally appeared on stage. Instead of the Daily Show's usual intro music a different song accompanied the Lavender Unicorn. Not being used to this much attention at once she looked a bit uncomfortable, though that might've just be a look of exhaustion from the many books she was hauling around. Strapped to the back of Twilight was a miniature sized wagon (though normal sized for a pony) that was filled with a random assortment of books that looked as if they would spill over at any moment.

Jon saw this and briefly shook his head as he got up to greet her. He met her halfway and shook her hoof taking a peek at the wagon of books which consisted mostly of history texts. After some time had passed the two stopped posing and waving to make their way to the center stage where Jon's desk awaited them both. Jon helped Twilight break free from her wagon and in turn she thanked him with a smile. Both found their way to their seats ready to begin, though the crowd was still in the middle of their cheering.

"Welcome to the show Twilight it's great to have you here!" Jon said.

"Thank you for having me Jon! I hope I'll do ok" Twilight responded. "I've never been on TV before."

"You nervous?" Jon asked.

"A little, but I've been practicing for days now." She responded. "I've already read three different books about appearing on Television."

"Oh well...that's...that's great." Jon responded. "You know uh,...a lot of people have been waiting for this."

"Oh really?" Twilight asked, still adjusting herself in her seat.

"It's true," he retorted. "You've...you've been mentioned on the show quite a few times already."

"Can't imagine why," She responded modestly. "I mean I'm nopony special."

Upon hearing this Jon gave her a look and slowly swiveled to the side to view the large and expensive set that he had his staff put together for the past few days.

"I really hope that's not true because if it is we blew a lot of money doing this." Jon responded.

"Speaking of which," Twilight said tapping the side of Jon's desk with her hoof. "I appreciate the sentiment and the attention to detail but, but there's more to me than this. I mean I like books but I'm not obsessed with them you know."

Jon once again greeted her with the same look he had given her before only this time he looked over her shoulder at the wagon willed with publications.

"Really?" Jon responded with a single raised eyebrow. "Coulda fooled me."

The audience laughed as an embarrassed Twilight Sparkle who inched forward in her seat to hid her collected material from sight.

"What is all that anyway, did you raid a library?" Jon asked, unaware of the fact that he just answered his own question.

"Oh well yes I...guess you can say I did something like that." She said, innocently fiddling with her hooves. "When your assistant asked if I needed anything I requested to go to the nearest library. I wanted to know what I was getting myself into before actually going forward with this."

Jon found her reasoning admirable though at the same felt a bit twang a of guilt since it took him up until now to do the same for ponies.

"What kind of books did you get?" Jon asked peering over at her collection.

"Oh many kinds!" Twilight responded enthusiastically. "A lot of these books are on human history and psychology but I did manage to get a few history books...but most of them are about American history since that's our present location. OH, OH, OH, but my favorite thus far would have to beeee...this one!"

Before anyone could react Twilight's horn glowed with power as she used it to whip out a massive book from behind her, levitating it in the air so all could see. The audience cooed in astonishment at the sight of real magic being performed in front of them.

"I know right!" Twilight said looking at the audience. "This book is interesting. It's called "Human culture and society" by one Charles Ellwood of Duke University. He states that It's impossible to understand human society without first understanding human culture...apparently human behavior is heavily influenced by economics, religion, politics and other facets of life. In fact according to him different groups of human life have--

"Actually twilight, uh...I--I'm pretty sure the audience was interested in the fact that you just used magic," Jon interrupted, motioning to her book. "And not Charley Longwood over here."

"Oh this?" She said looking at her horn. "It's a levitation spell, nothing special. NOW in this chapter Mr. Ellwood talks about how over the years humans have developed by as individuals by learning to modify their--"

"NO, NO, Twilight you don't understand," Jon interrupted again. "In our world we don't have magic...I mean, at least as far as I know, so for most I'm guessing this is a very new experience."

To see if this was true Twilight used her horn once again to levitate a few more books, spinning the around each other like molecules around an atom. Not a single audience member cheered or clapped due to the fact that they were all mesmerized by her effortless demonstration.

"How interesting," she said. "I can't even imagine a world without magic."

"See this is what I mean by 'special guest.'" Jon said pointing to her horn. "I mean you can use MAGIC...and you're on my show!...SUCK IT COLBERT!"

"But this is just a simple levitation spell," Twilight responded, placing all her books back in a neat little pile. "Any Unicorn can use it, I'm no different from anypony else."

"Well see now that's not true," Jon corrected. "You’re not just any Unicorn you actually have a very impressive Résumé...do you mind?" Twilight nodded sheepishly while Jon looked at his notes.

"According to my findings you...are the leader of the task force created by Princess Celestia called 'The Elements of Harmony,' you became the youngest pony ever to be accepted into Canterlot's school of gifted Unicorns where you received full scholarship as the Princess' Protégé, and you've helped save Ponyville many times from the forces of evil." Jon finished jokingly taking a deep breath as if he was winded. "Now that's...what I call 'special.'"

Twilight blushed as the audience stood in thunderous applause. At first she wasn't too embarrassed but once they started to chant her name she tried to cover her face with her hoof.

"Not only are you quite talented but you also associate yourself with some very important people." Jon continued. "Says here that, uh not only are you Celestia's most faithful student, but your best friends are the other members of 'The Elements of Harmon,' your brother is the Captain of the Royal Canterlot Guards, and your sister in law is a royal Princess...you're basically the John F Kennedy of Equestria."

Twilight humbled demeanor was quickly replace with a look of sudden realization.

"OH! I know who that is!" She exclaimed, using her magic to pull out another book. "I came across that name a little while ago when I was researching some of your leaders."

The crowd laughed at Twilight's continued habit of looking through her books during the interview. Jon would have interrupted Twilight who was busily flipping through pages but she was too laser focused at this point.

"I think it's fascinating how you humans go through leaders ever few years. I mean by home our Princess is always-- OH! I found it!" Twilight said, pointing in a section of a book about US presidents. "John Fitzgerald Kennedy, or JFK, was America's 35th president. He was born in Brookline, Massachusetts and became President in 1961 under the Democratic Party. Sadly it says here he was assassinated in Dallas, Texas, a few years later and his--"

Jon interpreting Twilight by putting a hand on her hoof, tilting his head to the side in an attempt to show her that the audience was laughing in her direction.

"Slow down there Google," he said. "We only have six minutes on the air you gotta pace yourself."

"Oh...sorry," she said, drooping her ears down. "I just uh...I find American history to be really intriguing."

"Is that right?" Jon asked. "Why do-- in what ways do you find us interesting? I mean you come from a world of talking animals and magic so I'm wondering what gets your attention over here."

"Well according to my research the land known at the United States of America was founded back in 1776," Twilight responded, who was tempted to go into further detail. "So that means it's only 236 years old...that's very young. Back in my world there are ponies who have lived almost five times that amount."

"Ok, no I see what you’re saying," he responded. "Is there anything else about America that you-- uh that you find interesting?"

"Actually there is! Like I said before that fact that you go through leaders so regularly is astounding." Twilight responded enthusiastically. "I find it most fascinating how your forefathers rejected idea of a monarchy so strongly and instead wanted a system where a new official was elected every few years. I understand the appeal of having a government by the ponies for the ponies, but their distaste for a royalty just seems to odd to me."

"Well the way most people see it is our founding fathers didn't want a system of government that had total control over the people but rather the other way around," Jon said, trying to match his guests level of intelligence. "I mean the idea of just one person...uh-- someone you didn't elect controlling so much has its flaws. I think Thomas Jefferson said it best when he said; 'That government is best--'"

"'When it governs least,'" Twilight interrupted, pausing for a moment. "I...I read a little bit about him too."

Jon was impressed by the level of understanding Twilight managed to accumulate in such a short time. He wanted to express that to her but it was too late...she was already as it again.

"Actually I've done some reading and I think I understand why most humans don't like royalty" Twilight said. "You see I drew some parallels between our two worlds and discovered that, when it comes to kings and queens, your past leaders had different life experiences that ultimately shaped the way they adhered themselves while on the throne, and--"

"You're doing it again" Jon interrupted, giving Twilight a look.

"Oh...I suppose I am," Twilight said with a blush. "Sorry!"

Jon didn't say anything but instead opted to stare at Twilight who in turn did the same, giving Jon a look like what a dog would give its master at the dinner table. The only thing that could be heard throughout their staring match was the audience's laughter.

"Alright go ahead." Jon said, surrendering to his guest's silent begging.

"Thank you! I'll make this quick I promise!" She said. "Now as I was saying...I think I've figured out why humans don't like royalty. You see your world had a point in time had something called 'The middle ages' where those who controlled nations did so from a throne. But back then life expectancy was very slim, in some cases 30 years was considered a full life. So kings were often very young, this meant that wars broke out at the behest of naive rulers who didn't know any better."

"Yes I'd imagine it would be rather difficult to run a nation while you have a raging hard on." Jon said turning to the audience. "Puberty! Amiright guys?"

"Well the thing is back in my world we don't have this problem," Twilight continued. "Our royal leaders are immortal, some of whom have lived for 100s of years; living that long has made them very wise."

"All I heard was your leaders could kick our leader's ass." Jon responded in his over-the-top New York accent.

Both Twilight and the audience laughed at Jon's satirical conclusion while Twilight's horn once again activated.

"Well I didn't say that exactly," Twilight responded, using her magic to levitate her mug of water to her mouth. "But we do know how to use magic."

Jon took a moment to respond as he wanted to wait for the audience's cheers of approval to come to an end. Once they did, almost at the same time Twilight set down her mug, he continued with his next point.

"Which reminds me, what kind of magic spells are there in your world?" Jon asked, genuinely curious. "Because on a uh-- from my point of view I've only seen a few of them first hand so could you enlighten us on that subject?"

"Well since you asked we have a wide variety of spells ranging from alteration and conjuration to illusion and restoration," Twilight said proudly. "There are also more...how should I put this?...destructive spells. Spells that are mainly used offensively though ponies know to only use those for emergencies."

"Now I've been...researching Unicorns in preparation for this interview," Jon continued. "And uh correct me if I'm-- if I'm wrong but for Unicorns it seems the common spells are levitation, teleportation, and illumination."

"For the most part you are correct," Twilight answered. "But I will say that a spell to teleport is actually a little more advanced than...levitation or illumination but it's still a pretty basic move.

"I wonder," Jon said. "Do you know of any...let's say 'enhancement spells?'"

"Enhancement spells?" Twilight asked.

"Yeah I mean has a Unicorn over in your world found a way to 'enhance' certain...attributes?" Jon continued. "Like say for example, ooooh I don't know...'male enhancement?' Like do you get chain emails about 'Male enhancement...s-spells'" Twilight was too busy thinking about the questioned to notice the audience's laughter.

"Male enhancement?...You mean like to make them taller or something?" Twilight asked back, confused as to why her legitimate question was met with laughter. Jon himself paused before answering both because of the crowd's laughter and because he was holding back some of his own.

"...You know what let's move on!" Jon said, shifting through his notes. "Now uh, now you said that teleportation magic is a pretty basic uh, subset of magic and as a matter of fact you yourself...teleported both me and yourself to this world. Now we uh, talked briefly backstage about that and it seems that doing so was no easy feat so could you explain...the significance of what you did."

"Well it's like this...teleporting yourself or someone else is a relatively easy spell but when it comes to doing so between different plains of existences it's a whole other story." Twilight explained. "You see we both exist in two completely different worlds so it's not as easy as say going from one end of the room to the other. Furthermore teleporting yourself is harder than teleporting someone else so it takes a pony with a very precise understanding of magic and skill to pull it off. Like Princess Celestia or--"

"Or like you." Jon interrupted.

"Oh well I don't like to brag," Twilight said, nervously playing with her hair. "But when I tried to transport myself to your office I go it on the very first try."

The audience once again began to applaud her. Although Twilight herself still wasn't entirely comfortable with receiving their praise she was slowly getting used to it.

"And you wonder why I wanted you on my show." Jon retorted as he turned to the audience. "Good thing you actually came on-- this one almost refused to come on you know."

Twilight nervously started to explain herself for fear that the audience might turn on her for almost declining to make an appearance.

"Wait! No it's just I-" Twilight said before being interupted.

"As a matter of fact," Jon continued. "You were this close to cancelling on me at the last minute."

"Well yes but...it's just it was so sudden!" Twilight explained. "I had everything planned out in my schedule and this just took me by surprise. Once I realized I could rearrange some appointments I knew I could make it today."

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't realize you had other plans." Jon said. "What kind of schedule does someone like you maintain?" At the time somewhere in Ponyville a few of Twilight's friends just facehoofed themselves.

"I'm glad you asked!" Twilight said as she used to magic to bring out a large piece a paper, unfolding it in strategic places making it even larger (almost to the point where it could completely engulf them both like a blanket).

"As you can see today I had planned to meet up with the Mayor to talk about zoning regulations in Ponyville," Twilight said pointing to a section on the paper. "Then I had to observe the migration patterns of the Ponyville toad but not before rearranging my wardrobe in alphabetical order. I managed to reschedule these for tomorrow but now I only get two hours of sleep tonight."

"Wow. Zoning regulations, migration patterns, alphabetical order...you must be a riot at parties." Jon said, staring at her massive schedule.

He had to admit there were some interesting looking entries that caught his attention like "Meet Rarity at Spa" or "Go to Sweet Apple Acres to taste test new pie."

"So you really schedule your entire day to the very last second?" Jon asked, as Twilight began to neatly fold up the massive sheet of paper.

"Well not every second, that's just silly. I usually schedule in some free time for myself to do fun things like looking for grammatical errors in magazines or seeing how many math problems I can solve in a minute. My record is 113." Twilight said proudly, while motioning to her schedule. "Oh and by the way this isn't for the entire day it's just for the afternoon.

Twilight used her magic to take out yet another sheet of paper which was even larger than the last one.

"This is for the entire day." She said. "And I don't plan my schedule just for the day...I do it for the entire month."

The crowd laughed as Twilight struggled to keep her giant schedule for falling over. Jon looked at the dozens of entries and wondered if she would ever have the time to come back on his show for a follow up interview. He continued to look at the schedule till something interesting caught his attention.

"Say Twilight?" Jon asked. "Did you jot down our interview on this thing?"

"Of course I did!" Twilight answered. "Why do you ask?"

"Because the entry marked on this day at this time just says 'Human observation experiment.'" Jon answered.

"OH JUST IGNORE THAT!" Twilight pleaded as she uncharacteristically stuffed her schedule behind her. "It's nothing!...oh um speaking of schedules I almost forgot I was supposed to give this to you."

Using her horn Twilight levitated a book from her wagon and placed it very gingerly in front of Jon. He instantly recognized the title, "Advance spells and Enchantments."

"I remember this," Jon said picking up the book. "I was going to try and check this out of your library but I forgot to ask."

"Indeed Jon. This is actually a very special book." Twilight explained. "It was a gift I received from the Princess herself. It had all kinds of useful spells, most of which are expert level. If you're still interested I can lend it to you."

At first Jon thought about turning down her offer since it sounded like it was very important to her and he was unsure of when they would meet again. Looking back Jon was infinitely relieved at the decision he made while at the same time haunted by the thought that he almost didn't take it.

"Sure why not." Jon said as he took the book, unaware of its importance. "I managed to read a little bit of this back at your place and I gotta say I really find it interesting...you know mostly because of uh...because we don't have any magic over here."

"About that...I was under the impression that you did." Twilight said. "When I was researching human culture I stumbled upon something very interesting. I read somewhere in a place called 'Washington' there's an elite group of men who are actually magic users like myself.

"Really?" Jon asked, utterly confused. "In Washington?"

"Yeah a group of 18 Wizards under some organization called the 'NBA.'" Twilight continued. A large smile creeped onto Jon's face as he placed his hand across his face. The audience laughed which made him laugh as well.

"Twilight...oh Twilight," Jon said, pausing to regain his composure. "The Washington Wizards are a group of basketball players...who-- They're just called 'wizards' they don't actually use magic. Their just a sports team." This sudden revelation caused Twilight to tilt her head with a look of confusion of her own.

"Wait wha-what? But I...but I read they went against another group of men," She added. "Another group of men who...who were made of magic!"

"I'm guessing you read bout the Orlando Magics," Jon retorted. "Again...same thing, they're just a sports team they don't use magic."

Twilight looked disappointing. Whether it was because her research turned up false information or the fact that there really wasn't any magic, Jon couldn't tell.

"So...so the stories I read about them using their skills to conquer wild bears, fearsome bulls, and even royal Kings?" Twilight asked with a sad face.

"Memphis Grizzlies, Chicago Bulls, and Sacramento Kings." Jon answered by tilting his head upwards, making sure he got the cities right.

"Oh...I see." Twilight said with a blush. "I'm afraid I'm not very knowledgeable about sports."

"Well I...can't even tell." Jon said with a funny look on his face. "If you want I can teach you a thing or two. I uh-- I have an extra ticket to the upcoming Giants game." Twilight sat up in her seat, a look on intrigue once again returning to her face.

"There are Giants in New York!?" She asked. Jon rubbed his hands across his face in frustration at the prospect of being back as square one.

"No Twilight again it's just a na-- you know what YES there are giants in New York." Jon said as the crowd laughed. A confused Twilight took this small break in the interview to drink from her mug again.

"If I may," Jon continued. "I would like to make an observation of my own using the data I've collected since we've met."

"Oh by all means!" Twilight said, leaning forward in anticipation.

"You...uh, you love books, always keep a schedule, find joy in otherwise mundane activities, and know nothing of sports." Jon said, receiving a nod of approval from his gust. "I have now come to the scientific conclusion, based on these recurring themes that you...are a huge nerd."

Twilight felt silly for walking into Jon's joke, displaying her feelings by pouting her lip slightly.

"Yeah I get that a lot from some of the other ponies back home." She said.

"'Back home' being Ponyville, right?" Jon asked.

"That's right." Twilight answered.

"How odd...It seems that uh, a lot ponies seem to live there who-- am I missing something or is that place just the happenest joint in town?" Jon asked. "I mean I would've guessed that someone like you would life in Canterlot. Seeing as how you're a Unicorn and you have a lot of connections over there."

"Well truth be told I actually used to live there." Twilight responded. "Grew up there with my family but then I was sent by Princess Celestia to live in Ponyville a few years ago."

"Why did she send you away?" Jon asked. "Was it some kind of punishment or something."

"No, no, no nothing like that." She answered. "She sent me to Ponyville because she wanted me to learn the true meaning of friendship!" Some of the audience members giggled at how corney her answer was.

"The true meaning of friendship huh?" Jon asked. "Couldn't she just've looked up its definition or something? I mean lord knows I sure you had a dictionary or two lying around somewhere."

Both the crowd and Twilight laughed as Jon grabbed his mug of water and extended his pinkie finger in preparation for his next joke.

"OH HELLOOOOOO Twilight!" Jon said, pretending to be Celestia by way of Queen Elizabeth the II's voice. "Listen I need you to go learn what friendship is! And to do this I'm going to send you far away from your family and home permanently! OOOOOH I do enjoy being a princess"

Twilight tried her hardest not to laugh for fear that Celestia was actually watching but in the end she couldn't help herself.

"Oh Jon that's terrible!" Twilight said, trying and failing to hold back incoming laughing fits. "There was more to it than that! She wanted me to learn what friendship was so me and my new friends could harness the power of 'The Elements of Harmony!'"

"I'm glad you brought that up Twilight." Jon said, leaning forward with interest. "I've heard of these elements before but I still don't know what they are. Could you explain-- and bare in mind I'm not from your world. But could you explain what these elements are and what they do?"

"Of course I can Jon!" Twilight said, raising her voice and clearing her throat so others could hear her. "You see Jon, The Elements of Harmony is the most powerful force in Equestria and is represented by 6 elements that keep our entire world from falling apart. These individual elements, personified by one of my friends, in order are: honesty, kindness, laughter, generosity, Loyalty, and mine which is magic. Each of us uses an ancient artifact that acts as a catalyst and when all the elements combine they unleash a great power...a power which we only use when evil threatens the land of Equestria and the ponies who inhabit it."

"Can you also summon Captain Planet?" Jon asked, breaking the serious mood that Twilight had delicately laid out. The crowd's laughter and Jon's facetiousness didn't sit very well with her.

"The elements are very serious Jon." Twilight scolded. "Without them life as we know it back home might not exist!"

"I'm sorry Twilight it just sounds so unreal to me...like something out of a cartoon." Jon said, trying not to laugh at his guest. "Now uh...you said you sometimes use the elements to fight evil. When was...the last time you actually had to use their power?"

"Well the last time we actually used the elements was about a year ago," She explained. "What happened was the town of Ponyville got taken over by Discord and we had to use its power to defeat him."

"Whose that?" Jon asked.

"Discord is a creature comprised of many mythical beasts," She said, furrowing her brow in contempt. "He is the god of Chaos and he lives only to plunge the world into lawless disorder. He's a creature of pure evil whose heartlessness is matched only by his insatiable urge to fuel himself on the suffering of others."

"Wow...this uh-- this guy sounds terrible." Jon said.

"He truly is!" Twilight responded, looking as if she was holding back some deep-seated emotions. "Tell me Jon do you humans have anypony like that in your world."

"Actually we do," He answered. "His name is Dick Cheney." Twilight though they were still talking serious at the time which is why she felt confused when the crowd busted out in laughter yet again.

"Now Twilight before we go I would like to say this...since the beginning of the show you've been real humble in your stance that your no one special." Jon said, sounding very serious for once. "But it's still my opinion that uh, that you are more important than you think so tell me uh--tell me honestly...have you ever experienced a time in your life where you felt like you were uh somehow superior or, or above other ponies?"

Jon's question didn't seem to sit entirely well with Twilight but she nevertheless gave it some genuine thought.

"Well there was this one time I broke into the spell archive room at the Canterlot Royal Castle" Twilight said, talking softly. "I was caught by a guard and even the Princess found me but I didn't get in trouble...I think it's because I had special privileges since they knew who I was." Twilight didn't mention her accomplishes for fear that they might get in trouble.

Usually Jon would have responded with a quip or two but he was still stunned at her story.

"You broke into the archive room of the castle!?" Jon finally responded. "You mean you actually went and-- you know I take back what I said about you being a Kennedy...you sound more like Nixon to me now."

"Oh, oh, oh I know who that is too!" Twilight exclaimed, once again using her magic to retrieve her book of presidents.

This time around however Jon had no plans of interrupting her.

"Here we go, Richard Nixon!" She said, finding the page she desired. "Richard Milhous Nixon was born in January 9, 1913 Yorba Linda, California where he became Senator. Later he became America's 36th President from January 20, 1969 to August 9, 1974. He is probably most known for the...scandal known as...'Watergate' where...he...."

As Twilight continued to read silently to herself Jon lifted his open palm in the air, counting down each finger in conjuncture with her eventual discovery.

"...HEY!" Twilight said poking her head from behind her book. Both the crowd and Jon laughed at an embarrassed Twilight who in time began to chuckle herself.

"Twilight it's been great to have you here tonight, thank you again for being here," Jon said grabbing her hoof. "Do you mind...just sticking around for about five minutes to show us some of your fancy spells and we'll just throw that on the web?"

"Oh well...I suppose I can fit that into my schedule." She said with a smile.

"Thank you very much Twilight. Tell Celestia I said 'hi,'" Jon said, now turning to the audience. "Twilight Sparkle everyone! We’ll be right back!"

The crowd cheered for more as the camera panned away from Jon whispering something into Twilight's ear. The camera took longer to phase into a commercial giving the audience at home a taste of what was to come by showing Twilight teleporting a few feet forward on stage for the audience. The crowd began to chant her name while the 'Daily show logo' flashed on screen then to another commercial break.

As Jon watched Twilight perform her spells he wondered who the hell he we was going to invite next that could even come close to topping this...unaware of the fact that his next guest was already on her way to Jon's home.

Next Chapter: Episode 9 [Trixie]: The Magician Estimated time remaining: 28 Hours, 36 Minutes