[Comedy]

This is an offshoot of Tumbleweed's Brain Problem Situation (4,091 words, [Adventure][Comedy])

STORY RUIN SITUATION: Applejack and Rarity are on a lunch date when Rarity finds her vocabulary degenerating to a terrifying degree. When they consult Twilight for a solution, she's having the same problem. Zecora reveals that the culprit is a Thesaurus, a psychic dragon who hoards erudition rather than precious items. Applejack sickens the creature through an unpalatable blend of refined Manehattan diction and down-home country vernacular.

Applejack turned to walk back to Ponyville. Hopefully Twilight and Rarity would have recovered their respective vocabularies and she could query Rarity more closely just what exactly she meant by "Sexy—

*squish*

Applejack stopped short at the sound. It was a distinctive sound, a slippery, ripe, organic sound all too common around Sweet Apple Acres. The sort of sound one's hoof makes when one unintentionally trods upon a hidden pile of Winona's...business... lurking in ambush in the grass. It promised olfactory and tactile unpleasantness for the foreseeable future (a real promise mind you that you could bank the farm on, not a politician's promise).

Applejack cautiously lifted up her forehoof to survey the damage. Much to her surprise, it was not a pile of business she had stepped in. It was a word, more specifically it was gooey, crushed, splattered, sticky remains of a word.

She peered closely, examining the dangling "tion" on one end and a sad little "Sh" at the other. There were a few broken ascenders and descenders poking out and maybe a diacritic or two, but Applejack could not make heads or tails of it. It also stank.

The whole mess started to slide unpleasantly down Applejack's frog. She snorted and quickly flicked it off and thoroughly wiped her hoof clean on a fresh clump of grass.

"I sure hope that wern't one of Twilight's big important Princessin' words..." She shrugged her shoulders and continued walking on, carefully stepping around the sullied grass so as not to stain her dress's hem. "Oh well. Say la vee as they say in Prance. I'm sure Spike can help her out with that one..."