As one, everypony in the throne room looked up at the ceiling.

There, lounging along the rafters was something so bizarre and unnatural I could've only imagined it. And yet... There it was in the flesh.

A brown furred, snake like body coiled around the wooden beams. Perhaps most disturbingly, each of its limbs seemed to have been torn off a different animal and attached haphazardly all over its body. A lizard's leg, a goat's hoof, a lion's paw, an eagle's talon, a bat wing, and a blue feathered wing.

A grey goat head with a deer antler and the twisted horn of some unknown animal drooped upside down from the mass of coils.

"After all..." the thing continued. "How could I have peace with my ears ringing?"

The eagle talon snapped, and a ivory white pair of devices, connected by only a curly string appeared in the lion's paw. The eagle talon then picked up the smaller of the two things and held it to the thing's monstrous head.

And suddenly, my ears had the strangest sensation of rapidly, and harshly vibrating like a struck drum.

Brrrrrrrrring!

"Gah!" I exclaimed in surprise, reaching up and trying to keep my ears still, fearful that they might fly away.

"Hahahahahaaha! Hohohoho!" the thing laughed, half falling, half slithering to the floor.

I realized then that everypony in the room was holding their ears.

At my side, Tia shook her head. "Who are you?! What do you want?!" she exclaimed up at the thing, who towered over even her.

The thing didn't respond, but continued to laugh uproariously.

"Hahaha! Oh my sides! Ahahahaha!" it chortled.

"Answer her or suffer the consequences!" I shouted, adding my challenge to Tia's.

"Ha ha ha... ha..." the thing slowed down. "Whew! Ah... Ha ha..." it wiped a tear from its eyes with its talon. "...Oh you know Sunbutt, Moon Moon." it regarded us both with a nod. "Just a teeny tiny thing."

Its lion paw reached out, as if offering something, but all that it offered was a tiny version of itself, standing upright on its goat hoof and lizard leg, its eagle talon pinching together.

"Just a little thing called Chaos!" It squeaked.

Tia and I both ignored the tiny facsimile and looked up at the original.

"Chaos?" Tia asked blandly.

"Well, maybe not exactly." the thing amended. "You may call me Lord Discord, Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony."

The thing retracted its paw, taking the tiny copy with it, and bowed theatrically.

"I'm too young to die!"

"Discord?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You're missing a 'Lord' in there Moonbutt." the thing winked.

"I only pay homage to one Pony. And you certainly aren't her." I growled.

"Word of advice, Blueberry with an attitude problem." the thing was suddenly beside me, opposite of Tia, one of its limbs over my withers. "Take a chill pill and relax. You'll thank me in the long run."

"You-" I started to growl.

"Oh pish posh, whatever you want to say isn't important." the thing let go of my withers and strolled in front of the thrones. "I've got so many references I need to make and only a thousand words minimum to do it in!" The thing's talon pulled a burlap bag with a question mark painted on it from... Somewhere, and held it aloft. "Lords, lasses, and assorted multicellular organisms! The FBI's most and least wanted! Friends and barely tolerated acquaintances! I, Lord Discord, Spirt of Chaos and Disharmony, present to you, my stuff!"

With that, it dramatically reached inside the bag with its paw and rummaged inside for a moment.

When the paw pulled out, it was holding some sort of shockingly yellow rabbit with red cheeks and a long, bizarrely bent tail.

"Pika?" It seemed to ask.

"Yes yes, I won't keep you long, go back to Pikapii." the thing stated, shoving the rodent back into the bag.

"Chu!" it squeaked as it disappeared.

The paw continued to rummage.

This time when it pulled out, it came with a long white thing with a bulbous head that seemed to vibrate like my ears had only a minute before.

"Whoops! Can't be showing you that without the sex tag." the thing pushed it back into the bag. "But you Ladies are gonna love it."

When the paw came out, it came out gripping some sort of strange cylindrical hat with a wide brim.

"I'll be needing this for later." the thing stated, flipping the hat with practiced ease and placing it on its head.

The paw dove back in.

"Enough!" I shouted, already sick of this thing's antics.

"One more! One more!" the thing chortled as it pulled out another thing.

This time it was something tiny, with a bright red body and face, with orange limbs, its lower limbs terminated in red rectangles, but its arms ended in a red claw, and a red sword that was styled as an open flame.

Was that some sort of toy?

The thing dropped his sack and started to fiddle with something on the toy's back.

"Gotta be careful with these, if you're too rough they'll fly apart and then it'll be real awkward to put back together..." the thing explained, as the toy's sword arm began to flail wildly.

"Enough!" Tia suddenly erupted.

The room suddenly felt a lot hotter than it did a few minutes ago.

The thing stared wide eyed at her interruption, but calmly picked up its sack and put the toy away.

"Well, it is a bit short I guess, but we are getting up to a thousand words..." it seemed to admit. "Alrighty then!" It suddenly straightened, back to its showmare attitude.

Before anypony could protest, it reached inside the bag once more, seeming to grab the bottom of the sack and pulled to turn it inside out.

Instead it disappeared entirely as it went inside itself.

"Ladies and germs! The moment you've all been waiting for! The main event!" the thing reached up for its hat and took it off again, twirled it between both its talon and paw, and flipped it, showing us all that nothing was inside.

"Behold! My things!"

The thing uphended its hat-

And Tartarus spilled out.

"Ahahahaha! Hohohohoho!" it uproariously chortled. "It's time to shake things up a little! It's time for some good ol' fashioned-"

If you know, you know! Colon trollestia colon!

Quit mucking about in the author's notes! I have things to say and jokes to make!

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Go on! Get! This bit is going too far!

Hohohohohohoho!

Hey! Get back here you overgrown Lung!