Once upon time, in the magical land of Equestria, Pinkie Pie was taking a pleasant stroll through the countryside on a warm and sunny summer's day. She was feeling super happy today, and couldn't help but notice the inkling of a song slowly beginning to build in her heart. Problem was, she didn't have any lyrics to her special song (an unusual first for pink party pony). Never-the-less, she did not let this deter her. She had a song to sing to express her happy mood, and by Celestia's sweaty and unkempt beard, she going to sing it!!! So she did:

"Hehehehe, what a silly song." Pinkie giggled happily. "One of my best yet, if I do say so myself." Pinkie continued her jaunt through the country side. "I wonder why I'm jaunting through the countryside today.""

Pinkie Pie was on her way to Fluttershy's house today. Her pegasus friend had promised to bake her a large batch of chocolate chip cookies if she helped her take care of some of her animals.

"Oh boy! I haven't been to Fluttershy's house in ages." The pink pony paused her prancing."Wait a minute! CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES!!!" She shouted in excitement. "I've got to get to Fluttershy's right now!"

With the speed of a caffeinated squirrel on methamphetamines, Pinkie shot over the many hills and pastures of the countryside until she finally caught sight a quaint, peaceful-looking woodland cottage, ironically overlooking the dark grimness of Everfree forest.

"There it is!" She squealed excitedly. "Here I come, chocolate chip cookies!"

When suddenly (Dun Dun Dun)...

FLURPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

...A gigantic cloud of green smoke (which smelt of rotten eggs, old gym socks and death) appeared before the pink party pony.

"Ewwwww!!!" Pinkie complained as she swatted the fowl odor away from her snout. Thankfully, the smoke and smell were quickly beginning to dissipate as the form of a new creature came into view. He was a man, roughly half Pinkie's height, with a pair of fiery red muttonchops and a scraggily goatee. He wore a black overcoat with blue button up shirt, and had on a strange-looking skirt that reminded her of an oddly familiar table cloth. Pinkie gasped (but not right away, she wanted to wait for the rest of the smoke to go away before she started breathing again) and addressed the man.

"Who are you?" She questioned.

The man stared at her quizzically as he smoked a white clay tobacco pipe. He smiled at her mischievously. "My name is Angus MacBeef, mi lass." He said in a heavy Scottish accent. "I'm a leprechaun..."

"Oooooooo~" Pinkie sang curiously.

"...An evil leprechaun."

"Oh no!" Pinkie shouted in terror. Suddenly, Angus snapped his fingers and the green smoke from before reappeared in the air above pink pony's head, like a smelly storm cloud. Pinkie screamed, and hid her head under my her forelegs with her butt still hanging in the air. The cloud flew downwards with a mind of its own and engulfed Pinkie in its smell. It flew underneath Pinkie's legs as she coughed and wheezed, making her feel tingly and slightly aroused, like a cold breeze was blowing against her nethers.

The cloud soon flew away from Pinkie and back to Angus's side. It quickly shifted shape until it resembled a golden retriever sitting up for its master. It wagged its cloudy tale happily and dropped to small somethings into Angus's open hand. Angus smiled. "Good work Stink Cloud. Ya made papa very proud."

Pinkie Pie stood up suddenly when she realized nothing had actually happened to her. Pinkie looked all over, examining her body. "HAHAHAHAHA!!" She laughed triumphantly. "You call that evil?! You didn't even touch me! Me and my friends have faced plenty of evils in our time, but that was the lamest attempt at evil I've ever seen."

Angus snickered sinisterly. "Are ya sure about that, Lass?" The leprechaun snapped his fingers again, and another cold breeze suddenly blew past Pinkie's nether regions. She squeaked in surprised delate, her eyes widening in shock.

Pinkie lifted her left foreleg and placed it between her hind legs. Rarity and the others (but mostly Rarity) probably would have shouted at her for ignoring the important rules of social etiquette given her opposite-gendered company, but Pinkie need to know if all was right with the world at the moment, and that was worth breaking a few rules. She was surprised to find her "hidden valley" was smoother than it had ever been before, and briefly considered asking the stink cloud if it had ever consider a career as a barber. But all ideas of excellent haircare quickly vanished from her mind, when she soon realized two lumps down there were missing from their usual place near her "crotch oven".

Pinkie squealed in terror. "My nipplies!" She turned to see Angus dropping her stolen nipples into a burlap bag with a painted nipple on the front. Pinkie growled like a canine of the canis lupus verity. "You freaky little weirdo!! You stole my nipples!" Angus MacBeef only chuckled in response.

"Sure did!" He stated proudly. "And now that I have your nipples, I'm going to use them along with the other nipples I've collected and take over the universe!!!"

Pinkie gasped and placed her front hooves on her cheeks. "NO!"

"YES!!" Angus shouted back. He then grasped his middle finger in his other hand and gave it a pull. Stink Cloud began to grow as the familiar "FLURP" sound from before began to wale. The cloud engulfed Angus MacBeef and his nipple bag as both began to vanish.

Pinkie's eyes widened as she broke into a sprint. "No! Stop!" She leapt for the cloud in a vain attempt to tackle Angus, but only succeeded in flying through the cloud before it vanished completely. She collided face first with the dirt, and swallowed a great deal of it as she slide (thankfully though, she wouldn't be getting any rug burn on her nipples this time). Pinkie sat up and coughed out the dirt she swallowed and turned to see Angus MacBeef and his Stink Cloud were gone. She began to feel her eyes water, and not just from the bruises and possible concussion she acquired from her painful meeting with the ground.

"This is terrible!" Pinkie cried. "How am I going to feed my future babies when the time enviably comes!!" Pinkie began to cry hysterically, before slapping herself across the face to regain her composure. "No, my future babies won't go hungry! Because Mama Pinkie Pie is going to get her nipplies back!" She began to ponder how she'd go about doing that. Then an amazing idea suddenly hit her.

"That's it!!" She exclaimed, turning back towards Fluttershy's cottage. "FLUTTERSHY!!!"