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Sunset Shimmer vs. The Cutie Map

by Arkhivez

Chapter 3: Your Mission, should you be able to find it.

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The sun shone beautifully upon Sugarcube Corner.


Pinkie Pie always made perfect cupcakes. Seriously, they were always perfect. It was kind of scary.

And yet, Sunset's chocolate-chocolate-it's-like-so-much-chocolate cupcake did not taste sweet, delectable, or pleasant. She held the cupcake with her magic, and took a small bite. The taste was awful. Not because of the cupcake, but because of the company she had to share it with. That company being the draconequus sitting opposite of her at the small, round table inside the sweet shoppe.

“This cupcake is...is...horribly wonderful!!” praised Discord.

Sunset felt herself getting sick as Discord munched a large amount of a brown, grey, amber, yellow and sarcoline colored cupcake. The only indication it was even a cupcake was its shape.

“Seriously, though. Pinkie Pie said she made a Chaos-flavored cupcake after my liking, and I was...very skeptical to say the least; but she started explaining how she used my chaotic nature and my different limbs as inspiration and...okay, mainly I just wanted her to stop talking, so I got the cupcake. But it's got...everything on it! Pinkie put aside special, weird, crazy ingredients just for my cupcake! They taste so odd together, but...there's still a unique flavor! It's so...so...”

“...indescribably non-sensible?” finished Sunset.

“Well...yes! And yet...still delicious.”

“Mhm.” muttered Sunset, dissatisfied.

“Look, I got you a cupcake.”

“You still haven't apologized.”

“I'm pretty sure I did.”

“You didn't.”

“Well...why should I?!?” Discord asked incredulously. “I built that security system for intruders, to protect the Princess. It worked like a charm, and what do I get? Bickering. Accusation. Contempt. Basically what I get for almost everything I do, ill-intentioned or not! And ponies wonder why I opted for being the villain.”

“You built that deranged ‘security system’ to get praise and to look good,” stated Sunset. “And I'm not wondering why you opted for being the villain at all. I can definitely see why. Getting to do whatever you want, without worrying about consequences. Sticking it to the ones that you can't stand, turning them into a punchline. So much so, that the thought of them standing up to you is comical.”

“A rather inflammatory statement.” Discord said a teensy bit offended. “And yet...near spot-on. Are you speaking from observation, or...experience?” Discord said that last word with a devilish lilt, cocking one of his uneven eyebrows.

“I'm nothing like you. I'd never breach...someone's most prized place, just because I felt like it was a good idea.” Sunset said.

“Well...you're either lying through your teeth, you used to do just that...or both,” Discord announced. He continued thoughtfully and peacefully: “So...which is it?”

“I have done everything in my power to change.” Sunset stated. “To make up for past mistakes; For how selfish and arrogant and...childish I used to be.”

“Ooh, why couldn't I have met that pony?” Discord asked with a bit of glee. “Though something tells me...she isn't too far away.”

“Look, I don't want the stupid cupcake. I don't feel like eating a cupcake. Let's just...find this 'friendship mission' that Princess Twilight talked about. I want to go home.”

“Aren't we the bitter sourpuss?” Discord said. “You remind me of Celestia when she gets grumpy.”

Sunset froze, unable to process what Discord said.

“Guess I struck a nerve. Are you her biggest fan or some--”

Sunset's magic was released, no longer holding the cupcake. The dark confection fell to the floor with a bit of a “splat”, smearing icing on the ground, crumbs scattering. A hoof came down upon it, flattening it instantly, before turning, as if to twist a metaphorical knife.

“We’re leaving,” stated the unicorn coldly.

Sunset got up, turned around and headed for the door.

“Um...will you be cleaning that up?” Discord asked. Sunset pretended not to hear him. Discord grumbled, and then with a sigh, summoned a mop with a bushy mustache that promptly cleaned the messy area. Everything was mopped into a bucket, the destroyed cupcake wiped off the floor as if it were never there. The mop and bucket vanished.

“Cleaning messes actually does feel slightly rewarding, even if I feel very pushed from my comfort zone,” Discord said inquisitively. He turned to Sunset and said, “Unlike you I'd rather be banned from less places in Equestria, thank you very much. I want to be able to have that cupcake again.”

Sunset was livid, and about to explode at him, but then saw the concerned faces of other patrons. She took a deep breath and calmed herself, closing her eyes. Her eyes re-opened, displaying a bit of contempt, but mostly calmed down. She simply exited Sugarcube Corner, fully expecting Discord to follow her.

Discord floated over to Pinkie Pie, who had caught the end of the incident when she heard the unmistakable sound of a cupcake with concentrated amounts of cocoa powder and high-maltose corn syrup hitting the ground. Discord shaked Pinkie’s hoof and casually tilted his head in Sunset's direction, saying:

“Ex-villains, amirite? Pinkie, every word you said about that cupcake was true. I will be coming back.” He winked, smiled, and twistingly floated out of the establishment, leaving a starstruck, smiling Pinkie Pie who was excitedly waving goodbye.

Sunset was walking around, and observing the town. She saw ponies going about their day, families playing with children, children playing with other children. She had to sidestep to avoid being run into by a young set of three: a white unicorn, an orange pegasus, and a yellow earth pony who were clearly enjoying each other's company and conversation so much, that they had trouble being aware of their surroundings. The small, yellow earth pony with a red mane and a cute pink bow did yell out, however:

“Oops, sorry ma'am!”

The three were giggling as they ran off. Sunset...smiled. She took a deep breath. The air was so fresh and clear here. The other world she was from was much more reliant on technology and more modernized, so it was hard to go somewhere that had just the unhindered atmosphere of friends and family walking about and interacting with one another, without lots of random noise and stimuli. Sure, her group was slowly improving things back where they lived, but this place, it had such a purity to it, that Sunset was now only vaguely familiar with.

Suddenly a strange sight caught her attention. Outside a shop across the street, there was a table that hadn't been there a moment ago, with two humbly-dressed draconnequi playing chess. One player wearing a sweater vest and a nice collared shirt moved a black castle piece, waving at her and smiling, while the other player, wearing an old leather jacket, grasped his head in worry.

“A quaint and friendly place to be sure,” said a horribly familiar voice behind her. “Once I got over how boring this place usually is, I learned to rather enjoy it. Oh, and that match was over before it even began.”

The yellow-and red unicorn turned and saw Discord behind her, and turned again to see that the chess players in his liking had vanished.

“See, already over.” Discord commented with a chuckle. “Look, if I said something that truly rattled you or hurt your feelings, that was oversight on my part.” He extended a lion's paw. “Forgive my gaffe. Gaffes happen quite often with me.”

Sunset didn't want to accept his apology, but she knew she had been in the wrong as well. She extended her hoof and the two parties shook. “I shouldn't have reacted the way I did,” Sunset admitted. “What you said crossed a line, yes, but reacting like I did helped nothing...I probably created more chaos there than you did.” Sunset chuckled in her confession.

“I sort of had chaos created for me there. Delicious chaos,” Discord commented, licking his lips. “So, you find our ‘friendship problem’ yet?”

Sunset looked around. Everyone was so...happy. Peaceful. She knew she'd have to come back every now and then, to soak in the pleasantness and to try and take a bit of that joy and peace back with her. She took a deep breath and said:

“This is going to take a while.”

Sunset walked about Ponyville, hearing Discord's rundown of each location, or his experience there, or his loose interpretation.

“And that place has tea that I turned into a singing chorus!”

“Most of what I’ve heard about this village pertains somehow to...you,” Sunset pointed out. “And it doesn’t really get us closer to finding a friendship problem.”

“Surely you didn’t expect me not to comment upon my own cultural influence upon this here town,” Discord replied casually. “I am history in action, my dear. Really there’s not much that happens here, other than myself and Twilight and her friends and the occasional amateurish conceited stage magician…

“I heard that you devil!!” yelled a familiar voice from far off.

Discord smiled as he continued, “All in all this town is...very untroubled. The best thing about it is also the worst thing about it...it’s safe. Something I can’t help but notice is that Twilight and the girls, when they go on “friendship missions”, they seldom do it in Ponyville. Maybe it’s because if there was a problem here, they’d quickly handle it; Or if a problem does happen here, it’s something they cause themselves.” He chuckled to himself.

“It’s...similar to where I come from, but a lot different too,” Sunset began. “The first thing I noticed is how peaceful it is. How friendly everyone here is. The simple but strong connections between ponies here.”

They stopped outside a shop with colorful paint splotches on the sign, the sign being framed by shapes of paint brushes and soda bottles.

“What’s in there?” Sunset asked.

“No idea,” Discord responded honestly.

Sunset entered without a word, prompting Discord to follow her in. A chime rang as the door was pushed in to reveal a small foyer area with a splotched greeting desk.

“Welcome to ‘The Wet Brush’! “ they heard a cheery voice say. “Where friends can bring beverages and relax as they get creative!” They turned and saw a young mare, with wavy hair colored a brilliant green and combed all toward one side up top, her sides trimmed short. She was wearing a black apron with stains on it, but her cutie mark, a series of different colored splotches, resembled the symbol on the sign outside. A large pair of bold-framed glasses adorned her face.

“So, people come here to...have a soda or a cider and paint something?” Sunset asked.

“Yep, that’s what we’re all about!” confirmed the egregious shopkeeper.

Discord began holding back his urge to laugh condescendingly. “Well, that sounds…”

“...awesome!” Sunset finished with a big smile on her face. “How does it work?”

“Well, you can set up a class in advance, and one of our staff will teach you how to paint a specific picture,” began the shopkeeper. “Or you can simply use one of our rooms that are open. Six bits for two hours, you can get up to two blank canvases, and use any paint supplies you see. Guests bring in beverages of their choice.”

“That sounds really neat! I’ve been on a huge art kick lately,” Sunset said excitedly. “Painting just has so much...relaxation to it.”

“Right?!?!” replied the enthusiastic shopkeeper.

Suddenly from down the hall they heard a crash followed by some angry yelling.

“I better see if everything is alright,” the shopkeeper stated calmly. She went down the hall. Sunset thought that clatter might be the problem they were destined to find, and trotted in the same direction. Discord floated behind her out of being drawn to the turmoil.

They entered a classroom. Two long rows of tables contained canvases, brushes, drinks, and palettes. Shelves of large paint containers covered the walls, a bit of the paint dripping onto the linoleum floor. There were also larger shelves that contained artwork with ranging skill levels.

Inside the room, there were about a dozen ponies. Toward the middle of the far wall, a rather young brown earth pony was crying, a bucket of paint on the floor, his brushes thrown all over the place, his canvas turned face-down on the table.

“Bristle, what’s wrong?” asked the concerned green-haired shopkeep.

“I’m terrible at painting! I can never get it right! I have an idea, and I-I-I just can’t make it happen!” He said through tears.

Sunset came closer to his area, and with her unicorn magic lifted the face-down canvas just enough to peek at the art piece he was working on. It was a small ship being tossed around by a stormy ocean.

“This kid really poured his feelings onto the canvas,” Sunset whispered to herself quietly with a chuckle.

“Just keep trying, Bristle, you’ll get it eventually! I think it looks great!” said the shopkeep.

“Actually, I think that might be the problem here.” Sunset said, as she used her unicorn magic to get the paint bucket off the floor that had been creating a small puddle of blue.

“Pardon me? Who are you?” asked the classroom teacher.

“Sunset Shimmer, Associate of the Princess of Friendship,” she answered. She didn’t ask for permission, and went directly to the boy, putting a hoof on his shoulder, a gentle look in her eyes.

“Hey there...Bristle, right?”

The young colt sniffled and said, “Yeah.”

“I’m Sunset,” she introduced. “So, why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you about your artwork?”

“I...I just want to be really good.” he said.

“Well,” Sunset remarked as she looked at his unfinished work, “I personally think you’re off to an amazing start. Let me ask you something. Did you want to paint today, or did you just want to be really good at it?”

“I...want to be good! I just said that!” said Bristle, a little irritated.

“Did you want to paint today?” Sunset asked.

“I…” Bristle hesitated to answer.

“If all you want to do is be good at something, then you won’t get much enjoyment out of it.” Sunset said. “And you won’t make great art unless you love what you’re doing.”

“That’s...actually very astute, miss.” said the teacher.

“Take my fr--er, associate over here.” said Sunset, motioning to Discord, who had donned a blue shirt and a brown afro and was painting what appeared to be a crude piece of an irritable Sunset Shimmer. She wanted to rebuke him, but she knew that wouldn’t help the young lad. “He’s really good at creating some mischief, and do you know why? He loves to do it. He loves it so much, you could say he’s a being of pure chaos.”

“It is what I’ve dedicated my life toward,” said Discord, walking toward them, now looking like his default self. “My very being, my soul…” Suddenly he twirled, and was in a tuxedo and cape. “‘Tis my passion!”

“He’s had years and years of practice, but none of that practice would have done him much good unless he had fun doing it.” Sunset said. “I wanted to be a talented sorceress once, but not because I loved magic. I did it because of the attention and recognition I got at a young age. I started acting and feeling miserable pretty quickly,” Sunset said with a laugh. “Tell me, Bristle. What do you want to do today? Honestly?”

“I…” Bristle began, before he had to think carefully. He then used his mouth to pick up a brush, dip it into a palette, and try again on a blank canvas. He started creating the ocean again, and this time it came peacefully and naturally. Sunset and Discord were both served ciders as the young painter worked, Discord’s cider coming out of his ears. Soon enough, Bristle created a painting of a boat washed up on a beach. The colors were beautiful. There was just enough realism to make it easily identifiable, but enough stylization that the painting made you look at it more to study it. There was even an impressive sunlight effect created within.

“Do you like what you painted, Bristle?” Sunset asked.

“Yeah!” Bristle said excitedly.

“I love it. I think you’ve got talent; but careful that you use that talent when and how you want to, alright? You deserve to enjoy your work.” Sunset explained gently with a hoof on his shoulder again.

“The sand being pushed under the boat looks a little muddy, doesn’t really give the right texture,” Discord said, holding a clipboard, wearing glasses, and tweaking a pen, disguised as a shrewd art expert.

“Discord!” Sunset said, getting ready to chide him.

“Haha...no, he’s right.” Bristle said cheerfully. “I haven’t really painted sand all that much...but I know the next time I do it, it’ll be better. I really had fun painting this!” he said joyfully. Sunset held up a hoof and he pressed his own hoof against hers for a hoofshake. “Thanks, Ms. Shimmer. Are you an artist?”

“An amateur artist,” Sunset quickly confirmed. “I’ve been really enjoying it though, and...I think you’re too good at it not to enjoy it. Wanting to be good at something is understandable...just make sure you enjoy the journey, okay?”

Discord made a gagging gesture as the young colt said, “You got it! I...I’ve had enough painting today. I’m going to go read a comic book.”

“Pick something fun,” Sunset said with a smile.

Discord and Sunset left the establishment together. Sunset looked quite pleased with herself and said:

“Guess we’ll go report to Twilight, then. I feel really good about that.”

Discord looked at her with a sly expression and said, “Hate to be a downer, but isn’t something supposed to happen upon completion of our little ‘mission’?”

“Oh...right,” Sunset said with a defeated tone as she looked at her sunset mark. “Princess Twilight said my cutie mark would start to flash, and your horns would do something similar.”

“Guess we’re back to Square One,” stated Discord. “Should have figured this would be a waste of time.”

“Hey, we did a good thing! That colt is going to enjoy what he does now!” said Sunset.

“You did that. I was more of a spectator,” Discord corrected.

“Oh yeah...you have a point,” Sunset agreed, putting a hoof to her chin. “If you didn’t help we wouldn’t really be accomplishing the task together, I guess.”

“Perhaps we need a more...spontaneous approach?” Discord suggested coyly. He snapped his fingers and suddenly they were on the Apple farm, watching the Apple family work and tell stories and jokes from a distance.

“All good here,” said Discord before he snapped his claws again.

“Wait--!” Sunset tried to stop him, but they were already at their next destination: Sugarcube Corner.

“Discord, we were just here!” Sunset complained.

“Well, with Pinkie Pie anything could happen!” Discord argued. “Though things have gotten...a bit slow since we left. Let’s try again!”

“Will you just--”

SNAP!

They were in Mayor Mare’s office. She had piles of documents on her desk, but she was taking the current moment to hold a mirror and give it a smolder. That’s when her eyes turned, and she saw a nervously waving yellow-and-red unicorn, along with her inquisitively grinning draconequus companion. She screamed, threw the mirror into a drawer, and immediately picked up some documents as if nothing happened.

“What do you want?!?” Mayor Mare asked, offended and embarrassed, face gone crimson.

“‘Sup good lookin’. Got a friendship problem?” Discord asked as Sunset face-hooved.

“No, but I have a security problem! SECURITYYYY!” she yelled. They could hear the sound of rushing hooves outside the office.

“Well excuse us for trying to help!” Discord said feigning hurt.

“Discord!” Sunset pleaded, a hoof pulling at his arm.

“Branch out further, you’re right Sunset, I was just thinking the same thing,” Discord said before he snapped his claws yet again, teleporting them out of the office just a split-second before the door was kicked in by security ponies.

They were in Manehattan, in a theater production on the street. They were dressed appropriately for whatever play was being put on, obviously something medieval.

“All the world’s a stage!”

SNAP!

They were on the very tip of a large boat in the ocean. Discord was holding up Sunset in the air with both upper limbs as he stood on a pony figurehead, and looked from side-to-side. It took Sunset a moment to realize where she was, and she got wide-eyed and red faced. Before she could yell at Discord however…

“Nope.”

SNAP!

They were in Las Pegasus. Discord was sporting an ostentatious orange suit, while Sunset wore a black dress with matching gloves on her forehooves, and strings of pearls around her neck. Discord twirled her around as he observed the room, seeing no signs of distress, only Ponies dancing and enjoying swing music.

“Nope.”

SNAP!

“WILL YOU STOP FOR ONE MOMENT!!” Sunset yelled. They were in a desert that was outside of a western pony village. Discord wore a hat and a brown poncho and stood kneeling toward the town, eyeing it carefully, toothpick in his jaw. Sunset wore a hat and poncho to match. A yellow earth pony with a similar outfit, a grilled cheese sandwich cutie mark, and brown curly hair was present and seemed to take offense at this.

“HEY! Get your own dramatic spot, pal!” he growled at Discord calmly, glaring his eyes. Discord rolled his own eyes and snapped his claws again. After they left, a pie seemed to randomly drop from the sky, landing on the yellow earth pony’s head. He couldn’t see and seemed unamused. He licked the pie off his face and suddenly became rather cheerful.

“H-hey!! Cherry with whip cream! He has good taste!” Cheese Sandwich said as he happily kept eating the pie.

Sunset and Discord were back in Ponyville, near the fountain in the town square. Sunset grabbed Discord with both hooves.

“Please--just--stooop,” Sunset pleaded. “Do you always just follow sheer impulse without a second thought!?”

“How else would you follow sheer impulse? With a notepad?”

“You’re not a fan of walking, are you?”

“Walking is for chumps. What about you? You’re a unicorn, you can’t tell me you walk everywhere.”

“I--auuuurgh!!!” Sunset exclaimed, annoyed with his behavior. She let go, taking a deep breath to calm herself, realizing they were in Ponyville and safe for the time being. “Please just keep us in Ponyville.”

“Here, let’s have a look around town. It may be a safe place, but sooner or later, there’s always somepony here having some sort of arbitrary crisis. Shuffle Mode activate!” He continued to snap his claws, magically sending them from random place to random place within Ponyville town borders.

“Nope...Nuh-uh...everything good….nope...nope…”

“Wait, go back!” Sunset said, convinced she saw something.

Discord took them to the last destination. It was some old ponies playing bingo.

“Er, one more.” she said.

They teleported back one more place. Two couples with children were standing there, and the fathers were having an argument.

Discord whispered down to Sunset, “Jackpot! Nice one, Sunset.”

Sunset glared at Discord and whispered back, “Not a contest! Things look really serious between them!”

Discord pondered. “Hm, you’re right. And...I don’t think it’s really our business.”

Sunset looked over to the families, with a concerned look that confirmed Discord had a point; but she looked up at Discord and said:

“We should at least try. This could be exactly what the map wanted from us.”

Discord rolled his eyes. “Fair enough.”

Sunset and Discord went over to where the two families were arguing. One mother was pleading with her husband to stop, while the other mother was facehoofing, embarrassed at her own husband’s actions. There was a filly from each family present. One filly had a black eye, and was standing next to her father unhappy, while the other filly was hiding behind her father.

“You don’t get to say that it’s my kid’s fault, Fairway!! She’s got a black eye! Let’s see any injuries your child’s got, huh?!?” the first colt accused, wearing a tie and sporting a baseball mitt cutie mark.

“My child had been bullied, insulted, and mocked everyday since the start of the school year, Leather Mitt!” defended the other father, bespectacled and having a cutie mark resembling a golf green and flag. “She may not have injuries, but her homework from last night is damp and covered in mud! Explain that one!”

“My kid says she didn’t do it, and that’s that! I don’t see any witnesses around saying otherwise! Your kid’s word against mine!”

“Yeah, no witnesses, because bullies wait until there’s nopony watching so they can get away with it!”

The other father looked furious, readying his arm to throw a punch. “YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW OR I’LL--”

“Gentlem--Gentlecolts! Please!” Sunset pleaded as she got in between them, with Discord not far behind her. “Look, we overheard your argument, and we don’t want this to come to blows.”

“Get this self-righteous peon’s kid here to apologize for hitting my kid, and you’ve got yourself a deal, lady!” said Leather Mitt. “And who are you anyway?”

“My name’s Sunset Shimmer, and I’m sure you’re all familiar with Discord here,” Sunset said as she gestured to the Draconequus. “We’re currently on the clock, as we’re searching for a friendship problem. Seems you two have got quite the problem here, and since we’re helping Princess Twilight....perhaps we can help mediate as an impartial third party?”

“We don’t need no ‘third party’, because this is plain as day! My daughter was assaulted! That filly over there hiding behind her father refuses to apologize!” he barked.

“My daughter was bullied by yours! She should get the apology!” the other insisted.

Sunset cut them off. “Look, let’s start over and hear both sides of the story. That’ll at least get us heading in a better direction.”

“I agree,” said Leather Mitt’s wife. “You two aren’t getting anywhere except madder and madder.”

Fairway’s wife also agreed and stepped in. “I would love for representatives of the Princess of Friendship to give their take on this,” she remarked with a stern voice.

“It was getting interesting,” remarked a certain Chaos Spirit.

Discord!!”

“Can’t you take a joke, Sunset?” said Discord with an exasperated sigh. A magic snap later and he was wearing a judge’s robe, sporting a curly gray wig, sitting behind a judge’s bench, and holding a gavel. A stenotype machine magically appeared and floated nearby, ready to take down every word. He banged the gavel and said, “We’ll hear each filly’s testimony of the incident. We’ll start with you. With the bad shiner on your face.” Discord gestured. “Go on sweetheart, tell us your tale, leave nothing out, you won’t be interrupted.”

The young filly with a black eye stepped forward, having a ruler and graph paper cutie mark. She sported a brown bowl-cutted mane that complimented her light blue coat surprisingly well. She stood before everypony semi-dramatically, and started her tale, the stenotype clicking as she spoke.

“I was just minding my own business when I saw Key Lime. I went to ask her about her homework. She got all mad, threw it in the mud, and then punched me!”

The other filly’s parents looked at their daughter, a girl with a Key Lime Pie cutie mark. She had a light yellow complexion, with green hair with light green highlights, a bit unkempt and curly. Her eyes reflected anxiety, and she was shaking her head at her parents. Sunset watched the expressions and mannerisms of each filly very carefully. She addressed the light blue filly with the black eye.

“What did you--”

“Waitwait, hold on!” Discord interrupted. He snapped his claws, and suddenly Sunset wore a very pristine dark sports jacket with a matching vest, a white shirt, and a gold and red tie that complimented her own colors quite nicely. She wanted to get mad at the interruption, but she looked herself over, grinned a bit, shrugged, and began again.

“Ahem...what’s your na--er, state your name for the record, please?” she asked. The stenotype continued clicking away.

“My name is Graph Square.” said the filly with pride.

“Nice to meet you, Graph Square,” she replied. “I just want to know, what were you going to ask Key Lime about?”

“Huh??” The young filly looked very confused all of a sudden.

“You said…” Sunset with her magic floated to herself some of the documents that had been printed by the stenotype. “...ah, here. That you were approaching her to ‘ask her about her homework’. What were you going to ask?”

“I--I don’t know! What does it matter?!?” Graph said defensively. Sunset raised an eyebrow at this. Graph Square’s mother looked at her daugher suspiciously.

“Mom, why are you looking at me like that??” Graph asked.

“Sweetie, you never forget anything when it comes to schoolwork,” her mother stated. “You haven’t had to ask your Dad or myself for help since you were six! You always know exactly what the teachers in school are assigning, sometimes you know the material better than they do. You remember everything else in vivid detail, but you can’t remember a detail about something you’re really good at?”

“What the heck are you talking about, Cotton?!? If our little girl says she can’t remember, she can’t remember! She’s probably traumatized by her assault!” Leather Mitt barked fumingly.

“Your child probably can’t remember, because it didn’t happen that way!” said the mother of the other filly. “My daughter can probably remember every time your kid bullied her in vivid detail, along with whatever happened at school!”

“You watch your mouth, Mrs. Fairway!” Leather Mitt yelled.

The parents were now arguing back and forth again. Discord got annoyed and slammed his gavel down on the bench with wind-creating force, shutting them up. “ORDER!” he yelled. Immediately after that, his eyes got wide with horror. The faux-judge’s gaze shifted very, very slowly to the gavel in his right lion’s paw. The paw opened and the gavel fell. He shook his paw with a nervous expression, uttering a frightened, “Nyehhh-h-h-h!!”

Sunset rolled her eyes, and cleared her throat to speak. “We should hear Key Lime’s side of the story, to avoid partiality.”

“Hmph,” Graph uttered, as she got off the witness stand, and the empty seat was replaced by Key Lime. Sunset began.

“Is your name ‘Key Lime’?”

“Yes, Ms. Shimmer.”

“Please give your account of the incident, and don’t leave out any details.”

Key Lime looked scared, but her parents gave looks of encouragement, and that seemed to fill her with bravery. She began her story.

“I walked to school, carrying my math homework in my mouth,” the small earth pony said. “Graph started walking closer, making fun of the bad grade I got on the test from the day before. She started asking me about the answers I put on my homework, and I told her I didn’t wanna answer her.”

“Why didn’t you want to answer her, may I ask?” Sunset inquired.

“I’ve asked her for help before, and she’s given me the wrong answers on purpose, and then laughs when Miss Cheerilee tells me I’m wrong in front of the whole class! The whole class laughs at me!” she said, with a hurt expression. “I wasn’t gonna fall for it again! She grabbed my homework, said my answers were wrong and started making fun of me. I told her to give it back, and she dropped it in the mud!”

“Hey, you stop telling lies about my kid--!” Leather Mitt said, angry at the child.

“Hey hey, your kid got to speak with no interruptions, you cool it, buddy!” Discord intervened. “Or I show you how Princess Celestia dealt with unruly hecklers back in the day.”

Leather Mitt gulped and remained quiet. Sunset ushered the young filly to continue.

“Graph stomped on the homework a bunch of times, she started talking about how dumb I was, how I’d never do anything in life, that my cutie mark meant that I was a loser, I-I...I just got really mad, and I hit her.” she admitted sadly.

“Ha, she admits to the crime, we’re done here!” Leather Mitt proclaimed.

“Hang on a minute, you said Graph stomped on your homework?” Sunset asked.

“Yes…”

“Is that homework anywhere nearby?”

“It’s here in my bag! I was gonna tell Miss Cherilee what happened.” she said, gesturing to it. Sunset levitated the saddlebag over to her.

“Please show us the homework that you talked about.” Sunset said, offering the saddlebag. Key Lime opened it and pulled out the muddy mess of homework with her mouth. It did indeed looked like it had not only been in water and mud, but it had distinctive, muddy hoofmarks on it.

“I’d like to submit this as ‘Exhibit A’, your...um, honor,” Sunset requested, a little weirded out that she had referred to Discord by such a title.

“Yes yes, let the records show blah blah blah April 22nd...so that’s the homework, huh?” Discord asked the filly.

“Yes,” said Key Lime.

Sunset looked it over. “Hm...most of these answers are correct! Oh, I hated that one as a kid...also, there’s hoofprints on here.” Sunset pointed out. “Your honor, I’d like to ask Graph Square to submit her own hoofprint to see if it matches the one on here.”

“Permission granted, now it’s getting interesting.” Discord said with that fiendish grin, snapping his claws making an ink pad and a large sheet of paper appear. Sunset walked over to Graph Square while levitating the items and placed them before her.

“Please stamp your left and right hoofprint on this paper,” Sunset ordered.

“What--no! You’re not my mom or my teacher, lady! I don’t even know you!” said Graph incredulously.

“Well I’m your mother, and I’m telling you young lady, do what she asks, right now!” said the mother with frustration. Graph looked a bit scared, and then gave a defeated expression. She begrudgingly obeyed, stamping her hooves onto the fresh ink, then placing them on the paper. Sunset held up the ruined homework and the forehoof stamps side by side with one another with her magic.

The hoof markings on each paper matched perfectly.

“Wha….Graph??” Leather Mitt exclaimed, his tune changed dramatically. “Explain yourself right now, young lady!”

“Oh-ho-ho, yes please,” said Discord, a hungry expression in his eyes, the stenotype recording every single word and action.

“I...I…!” Graph began, darting her eyes side by side, mouth opening and closing, unable to say words.

“The truth, now!!” said the mother in anger. “Did you stomp her homework?!?”

“....yes.” said Graph, starting to cry, only this time it had nothing to do with her black eye.

“Have you been doing what she said, making fun of her, humiliating her in class!?” asked Leather Mitt with anger.

“I…” Ruler began, scared. “I’m always the one Miss Cheerilee gives gold stars and says nice things about! Key Lime isn’t as smart as I am, she shouldn’t get that stuff!”

“Absolutely precious,” chortled Discord excitedly, still wearing the Judge’s robes, but now helping himself to popcorn and soda. “You’re so eager to keep other fillies beneath you, that you literally stomp their homework beneath your hooves! You’re not just egotistical, you’re haughty and brutish to the core!”

“But sweetie,” began Key Lime’s mother toward her own daughter, “You still hit her. That’s mean, too. Do you want to be mean and give black eyes to fillies?”

“No…” said Key Lime. “I just...got so mad. I just wanted her to stop!”

“Apologize. Right now.” said Key Lime’s mother.

“Young lady, you too. Apologize right now, or you can forget about going to hoofball games!” said Graph Square’s father angrily.

The fillies approached each other begrudgingly. Graph was the first to extend her hoof.

“I’m sorry. I’ll stop making fun of you and giving wrong answers,” she promised.

Key Lime extended her hoof to meet Graph Square’s.

“I’m sorry too. I won’t hit you again.”

The judge’s bench, witness stand, and Sunset’s and Discord’s court clothes all disappeared, Discord wiping his claws back and forth against one another.

“Well, no need to thank us,” Discord said with lacking subtlety. “We’re proud operatives of friendship.”

“Uh...thanks.” said Fairway. He looked over at Leather Mitt. “Bowling tomorrow night?”

“You got it, pal!” said Leather with a hearty laugh, putting an arm around him as the families walked away together, being observed by Discord and Sunset, who happily waved goodbye at them.

“Usually those out to do good don’t expect praise automatically,” Sunset said under her breath at Discord as she waved.

“You have your way, I have mine,” Discord said nonchalantly. “What does it matter, other than we solved today’s little friendship kerfuffle, and we can both go back to whatever we were doing??

“Um...Discord…?” Sunset said.

“What?”

Sunset pointed at her cutie mark, which was giving no telltale flashing or glowing. Discord looked up at his horns, which were also doing nothing. His eyebrows raised in surprise.

“What?! But we--!”

His brows than furrowed in anger.

“I--rrngh--grahhhh!!”

He summoned a table with his magic and flipped it over with his arms, the table giving a dramatic crash on the ground. He folded his arms in brewing anger, steam coming out from his ears and nostrils.

“I quit!” Discord yelled.

“We can’t.”

“Stupid table! Stupid rules!!” he complained.

“...said the judge,” Sunset concluded with an amused expression.


Ulch...I need chaos ice cream. Stat!”

Author's Notes:

Whew, that was a long one! I hope you all enjoy. =D

Next Chapter: At least we did it together, and stuff? Estimated time remaining: 8 Minutes
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