"Come on, I've made dinner everyday since I moved in, can you please do it just this once?"

"Augh, why are you always asking me to do stuff?" Floor moans, flopping backwards on the armrest opposite of you. "Don't I do enough already?"

"You literally sit in your room all day masturbating to cartoon porn. The only thing I ask you to do is keep it down after 9PM and open your window so the whole apartment doesn't smell like fish and hay."

"That's still a lot," she mumbles, crossing her hooves and glaring up at the ceiling.

You begin prodding her with your big toe. "Come on, please? I mean it, Floor, work's got me wiped today. Just this once?"

Floor gives a long, suffering sigh, but says, "Fiiiine, I'll make dinner so you can rest your squishy human feet."

"That's all I ask," you respond with a smile, ignoring the waspish tone of your roomie. You'd let the mare call you every name in the book right now if it meant you didn't have to rise from the couch.

Grumbling, Floor Bored rolls from the cushions to flop onto the carpet, staying there for several seconds before standing. Acting as if each step is an ordeal, the NEET mare makes her way to the kitchen area behind the couch, and you stretch your legs across the now-available sofa space.

Closing your eyes, you drift into a state of half-consciousness as sounds start to emanate from the kitchen. Things start to get loud after a while, and a small part of you worries what the mare could be up to, but you shove it to the back of your mind and continue resting your eyes.

At some point, you must have fallen asleep, because the next thing you know, you're being shaken awake by an off-white hoof. "Come on ya big baby, dinner's ready," she says, only stopping when she sees your eyelids crack open.

"Really?" you ask with a yawn. peeking at your watch, you realize it's been over two hours. "What took so long?"

"You're welcome," she grumbles with narrowed eyes. "I had to make the noodles from scratch for one, plus we didn't have a lot of the other ingredients, so I had to go to the store." She makes a face. "I had to actually socialize, so you better appreciate the effort."

At that moment a mouthwatering scent begins to invade your nostrils, and your curiosity is instantly peaked. "What'd you make?" you question, rising up as the mare steps back. Looking towards the kitchen area, you see two large bowls sitting on the small table, their contents steaming.

"Miso ramen with tofu skins and a soft boiled egg," she explains dully, stepping around you to take her place at the table. Without another word, she picks up a pair black chopsticks etched with eastern-styled dragons in gold leaf, and begins slurping noodles down her gullet.

Blinking in bewilderment, both at the bizarre sight of a pony skillfully manipulating chopsticks with hooves, and the masterfully assembled meal, you move to your seat and flop down. Staring down into the heavenly smelling bowl and swirling soup, you pick up the pair of cheap, disposable chopsticks and break them apart on autopilot.

You use to eat out at oriental restaurants all the time back home, and the bowl of ramen before you equals any you got back home in presentation. You don't speak, too stunned and sure that this is all some strange dream, and twirl a bundle of noodles with your chopsticks. You don't wake up as you bring the broth-covered noodles to your lips and slurp. Flavor explodes in your mouth and you moan in ecstasy.

"Shoo goo," you murmer between mouthfuls, unable to stop. The noodles vanish in less than a minute, followed quickly by the half an egg and tofu skins. Your trip to umami paradise is over all too soon as you finish licking every last drop of miso from the bottom of the bowl.

When you lower it, it's to reveal the sight of Floor Bored's deadpan features and quirked brow.

"Like it?" she asks rhetorically.

"I love it," you answer, falling back in your seat, eyes just beginning to glaze over. "Tell me the truth, Floor, you ordered this, didn't you? Come on, tell me so I'll know where I'll be eating for the rest of my life."

In answer, she simply looks over to the stove top, your eyes following her lead to land on the simmering pots and pans and messy work station. She smirks.

"Sorry, Anon, but looks like you'll be coming to me if you want to eat like this again, and I'm sorry to say, but I don't think you can afford my prices."

"Anything," you say instantly, leaning forward. "Anything you want, and it's yours, just don't deprive me of your ramen."

"Hmm, well, I can be a generous pony," she says in contemplation. "For instance, I made enough for one more big bowl that I was gonna have myself, but-"

Tossing the bag of bit from your waist unto the table, you tell her, "There, that's all the money I've got besides the stuff set aside for rent. Now can I have the last bowl?"

She giggles. "Oh, Anon, I don't want your money, silly. I mean, lets face it, pretty much anything you buy is for the apartment anyway, so I already benefit from your bit bag. No, I'll need something different for payment."

You gulp. "Like what..."

Her smile turns wicked. "I'm glad you asked."

The room is filled with moaning as you go to work on Floor Bored, the mare writhing in pleasure. "Ooh, Anon- Yes! Right there! Harder!"

Grunting, you double your efforts, pressing harder into the mare. The muscles in your forearms begin to ache as your fingers and thumbs work into Floor's soft frogs.

She resists the urge to kick her back legs as your hands massage the sensitive flesh, a thin line of drool leaking from her lips as her eyes roll up into her skull.

You have no doubt that the smell of unwashed hooves will stick to your digits for days after this as your feel them dampen with frog-sweat, but you can't bring yourself to care as the taste of salty, savory ramen still lingers on your tongue. You'll have to do this, as well as give her back rubs and cuddles everyday for the foreseeable future, but in exchange, you'll be getting heavenly noodle soup for every dinner.

That's more than a fair trade, you think.

"Oh Gods, Anon, you're sooo good! Yes! Yes! Knead my hoof like a ball of dough! Yessss!"

Author's Notes:

I wanted to write a slightly different Floor Bored, and I've got to say, it was a fun little exercise. Where as the main story's Floor would have been more than eager to please Anon and jumped at the opportunity to cook for him, this lazy, anti-social Floor was none too pleased with the request.
Luckily, while far from a good cook, this Floor had mastered a single recipe, and Anon got to experience the benefits of such culinary specialization. He got hooked on the ol' MSG.

---

Anyhow, I've got one more short blurb to share with you all, and while it's not a clop, it is pretty sexual, so be warned. Now, without further delay:
BONUS OMAKE:
One day while browsing the web, Floor's screen goes completely black, but before she can start troubleshooting the issue, green letters start to type across the screen.

WE ARE ANONYMOUS. WE ARE LEGION. AND WE HAVE BEEN WATCHING YOU.

"W-what?" Floor squeaks, eyes darting to where the webcam of her computer is covered by a post-it note. As if somehow knowing where her eyes had strayed, the letters delete themselves to make room for a new message.

NOT THROUGH THERE, LITTLE PONY. WE HAVE ADVANCED FAR BEYOND THAT.

"L-like aliens or something?" she questions, feeling foolish a second after. Aliens aren't real, and wouldn't be interested in a NEET like her even if they were. This is obviously some sort of elaborate prank.

OF A SORT, YES. WE HAVE WATCHED YOU, FLOOR BORED, AND WE LIKE WHAT WE HAVE SEEN.

Instantly, she thought of just what they could have seen while she was sitting in front of her computer screen, and she blushes fiercely. "W-what do you want?"

WE WANT YOU.

"M-me?"

YES, YOU. WE WANT EVERYTHING THAT YOU ARE. WE WANT YOUR SCENT, YOUR LUST, AND TO SHARE OURS WITH YOU.

Floor gulps, not believing what is happening. She lifts a hoof and stares at it for a few seconds, before suddenly slamming it into her cheek. the force is enough to knock her from her seat, the chair falling one way as she falls the other.

"Ow," she mumbles, slowing raising to her hooves.

THERE IS NO NEED TO HURT YOURSELF, FLOOR, WE ARE REAL. THIS IS REAL.

"This is crazy!" Floor says, panicked, "There's no way aliens are talking to me, and definitely no way they'd want to- to..."

FUCK YOU SENSELESS? BREATH YOUR MUSK BEFORE COVERING YOU IN OUR SEED UNTIL YOU ARE DRIPPING WHITE? WE ASSURE YOU, THESE ARE OUR DESIRES, AND WE KNOW THEY ARE YOURS, AS WELL. ALL YOU NEED DO IS SAY YES, AND IT SHALL BE.

Floor stares disbelievingly, jaw hanging loose. There's no way this is real, but so what? What was the harm, really, in saying yes? Either nothing would happen, or the pranksters would reveal themselves and have a good laugh at her expense. Nothing lost in the former, or even the latter. She has no dignity left, after all.

... And there is a third, impossible possibility, that sets her clit winking.

She gulps, and whispers, "Yes..."

The screen flickers and goes dark. After several seconds, Floor feels her cheeks begin to burn. How could she have been so naive? Of course nothing would happen. She is such a little filly-

The light above flickers, and the air itself begins to hum. That's all the warning she gets as the room is suddenly filled with a blinding light, and she yelps.

She rubs her stinging peepers and blinks away the dots. Several black spots remain however, and for a moment, she fears permanent retinal damage.

Except... The dots weren't dots, they were suits. Fancy ones worn by tall, bipedal creatures.

She gawks as one steps forward, giving her a smile that shows pointed canines. "I must say, it is an absolute pleasure to finally meet you face-to-face, Floor Bored. I am Anonymous. We all are in fact, and we are all eager to begin."

Her emerald eyes follow his strange, elongated paw as he grabs hold of his bulging package, his pants stretched taut around the equipment. A thin strand of yellowish marecum drips to the floor as her pussy winks, getting many of the Anons around her to grin wolfishly.

"And I think it's safe to say you are just as eager. So why dally any longer?" He punctuates the statement by slowly pulling the zipper down.

Despite the fear and confusion still lingering in her heart, Floor can't stop the thrill of excitement. First-contact with these strange, alien beings is going to be extremely, intimately close.

---

Welp, that was weird, but also fun to write, and that's what matters, right?

By ScraggleMan.