Equestria Wrestling Federation

by chillbook1

First published 7th of August, 2017

The most exciting displays of professional wrestling prowess in all of Equestria!

The Equestria Wrestling Federation boasts the greatest spectacles of sports entertainment. Tune in on Mondays for Magic, the longest running episodic series in Equestrian history, and Fridays for Ascension, the brain-child of one of the greatest professional wrestlers of all time: Twilight Sparkle!

A professional wrestling experience.

"Other" Tag is for roster including, but not limited to: Pinkie Pie, The Dazzlings, The CMC, and more!

ON HIATUS! SEE YOU IN A FEW WEEKSEVENTUALLY, I PROMISE!

Monday Night Magic

The arena erupted into cheers as the fireworks went off, signalling the start of the show. The fans of Monday Night Magic were extremely excited for another night of high-octane professional wrestling, and they let that excitement manifest in the form of a loud, persistent cheer. The thousands in attendance were so loud, the two commentators at ringside could barely hear themselves think.

“Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,” said Celestia, waving her hands excitedly. “Welcome to EWF Monday Night Magic!”

“The most electrifying part of your dreadful Monday!” chimed her commentating partner, Discord. “You’re watching the longest running weekly episodic show in Equestrian history! I’m Discord Redrum.”

“And I’m Celestia Regal, and we’ll be kicking off tonight’s show with some tag-team action!”

Now, you’re under our spell…

Oh-whoa-oh, oh-whoa-oh

No sooner did Celestia speak did the entrance music hit, signaling the arrival of the night’s first competitors. The crowd reacted as expected, with loud, roaring, unanimous boos. As the music warped from the seductive vocals to a mesmerizing, enchanting tune, two women walked out from backstage. They paused at the top of the ramp, letting the fans soak in their appearance.

One was rather muscular, but still clearly effeminate. Her orange and yellow hair was a huge puff contained by a scrunchie, stopping just past the ball of her neck. She wore a simple orange top with similar trunks, her bottom half marked with the symbol of a treble clef hiding behind a yellow diamond on the butt.

The other was thinner, more lean. Her top was violet with bright green trim, matching with her tights and pigtails. Around her waist, similar to her partner, was a belt of black leather with a circular gold plate at the front. It had the etching of “EWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS” in the center, surrounded by six gems of varying color.

The two women removed their belts and held them over their heads, basking in the sheer hate and loathing from the crowd. The woman with the orange hair gestured to the back, and the crowd exploded into cheers.

A third woman ran from backstage, with bright blue ring gear, her long blue hair tied up in a ponytail, and a massive smile on her face. She was easily the least physically imposing of the three, but she had a fire in her that the others didn't seem to have.

“The following contest is a tag team match, scheduled for one-fall!” rang the voice of the ring announcer. “Making their way to the ring, from The Black Sea, they are the EWF Tag-team Champions… Aria Blaze, Sonata Dusk, and Adagio Dazzle… THE DAZZLINGS!”

Aria and Adagio strolled leisurely to the ring, chatting to each other about the coming match. Sonata, on the other hand, was running up and down the aisle, interacting with the fans and showing her thanks for the support. Eventually, she made it into the ring and draped her arms around her partners. Aria and Adagio pretended not to notice, instead focusing on the ramp.

A short few chords of a cello were heard, followed immediately by loud electronic dance music. The cheers from the crowd were loud and even, but nowhere near as deafening as Sonata’s. The two women who walked out wore matching grey and white ring gear, but looked very different in every other way. One was wild and explosive, her hair a spiky mess, while the other was tame and controlled.

“And their opponents, from Ponyville, at a combined weight of 312 pounds…. VINYL SCRATCH AND OCTAVIA MELODY!”

“Time for some great two on two competition,” noted Celestia as Vinyl and Octavia made their way to the ring. “Who do you favor in this match-up, Discord?”

“The champions, of course! I've said it before and I'll say it again: Aria Blaze is one of the greatest technical wrestlers of all time,” said Discord. “And Adagio has impressive power for someone her size, her opponents often underestimate what she's capable of doing.”

“You're forgetting someone, Discord. What about Sonata Dusk? The acrobatics this girl can do… If I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I'd never have believed it.”

“That girl is an embarrassment to look at,” said Discord. “She's a joke! And not a funny one, either!”

“She seems to be the only competitor on the team with any sort of respect for the sport,” countered Celestia. “Sure, she's a bit of a goof, but she's talented, and she loves what she does.” She might’ve continued, but the match was beginning. Sonata held her arms up, and both of her partners bumped forearms with her. Aria removed her championship belt and handed it to Adagio, who slung it over her shoulder and rolled out of the ring, remaining at ringside to observe the match.

Aria and Vinyl were picked to be the first competitors in the ring, and their partners went to their respective corners. The referee stood between the two wrestlers, checking to make sure they were ready. When he was sure the match could start, he called for the bell. As soon as the bell rang, Aria rushed forward, hoisting Vinyl up and slamming her directly onto her back.

“And Blaze starts off this bout with an absolutely vicious spinebuster,” noted Discord. “Scratch back on her feet, looking understandably disgruntled, and now into the collar-elbow tie up, not where you want to be with Aria Blaze.”

Aria, locked up with her opponent, was mostly scouting. When she noticed a moment of hesitation in her opponent, she slid under Vinyl’s arm. She kicked Vinyl in the back of the knee, then wrapped her arm around the back of Vinyl’s neck before driving her face into the mat.

“Blaze follows with a picture-perfect snap DDT,” reported Celestia. As she spoke, Aria grabbed Vinyl by the hair and dragged her over to her corner, where she tagged Sonata in. The crowd cheered excitedly, giving off an energy that Sonata took in and directed into a quick kick to Vinyl’s side. Vinyl struggled back to her feet, only to be taken down by a quick, well-placed enzuigiri to the side of the head.

Sonata ran across the ring, rebounding off of the ropes. She flipped onto her hands and dropped an elbow right onto Vinyl’s chest. Sonata leapt to her feet, soaking in the cheers of the fans. She dragged Vinyl to her feet, pushed her into the corner, and enthusiastically tagged her partner back in.

“Look at the expertise on display here,” said Discord as Aria planted her boot against Vinyl’s throat. “See how they’re cutting the ring in half, keeping Scratch separated from her partner? That’s an instinct that you develop over years of experience. These girls just got here fourteen months ago.”

“Nobody is doubting their talent,” said Celestia. “It’s just a shame how they choose to compete. If they only just played by the rules, showed respect for their opponent and the sport, then maybe—”

“It’s only cheating if you get caught! In this industry, you do whatever you need to do to make it!”

Aria continued applying pressure to Vinyl’s throat until the referee made it to a count of four, at which point she hooked her arm over Scratch’s neck and planted her with another snap DDT. Aria raised her hand over her head, the boo’s growing more and more deafening. She snarled angrily, then ran to the other corner and delivered a bashing forearm to the side of Octavia’s head. The crowd’s displeasure grew as Octavia hit the floor, finally growing to be too much for Aria.

“Screw you!” she shouted, leaping onto the middle rope. “We don’t need you! We’re tag-team champions! Screw all of you!”

As Aria shouted at the crowd, Vinyl slowly worked her way up to a vertical base. With her opponent distracted, Vinyl seized her opportunity. She ran over and slipped under Aria, placing her head between her legs and hoisting her up on her shoulders. With a thunderous boom, she fell straight back, driving Aria’s spine against the mat.

“And Scratch with a hard electric chair drop,” called Celestia. “And she goes for the lateral press. Shoulders down, and one! Two!” Aria brought her shoulder from the mat just in time. “And a kickout at two.” Vinyl and Aria both remained on the floor, Vinyl crawling to the corner in search of a tag.

“This could be just the twist of fate that Scratch needs,” said Discord. “If Melody can get to her corner, that can be enough to win them the match.” Octavia recovered from the floor, pushing herself to her feet. All she had to do was climb back to the apron and be there for her partner.

Adagio ran around the ring, gunning for Octavia. With the referee distracted by Aria’s forlorn body and nobody to warn her of the coming threat, Octavia had no way to prepare herself for the assault. Adagio viciously introduced the title belt to the side of Octavia’s head, knocking her to the ground where she lay, unmoving.

“See, that’s precisely the behavior I was talking about! Cheating, blatantly cheating!” complained Celestia. “It’s an insult to those prestigious championships.”

“Like I said before, it’s not cheating if you don’t get caught!” laughed Discord. “And good on Adagio Dazzle! She saw what needed to be done and wasn’t afraid to do it!”

Vinyl reached for a tag, shocked to see that her partner was nowhere to be found. She groggily pulled herself to her feet, searching for Octavia. When it was clear that she was on her own, Vinyl directed her attention towards her forlorn opponent. She carefully made her way to Aria, flattened in the middle of the ring. She grabbed a fistful of purple hair in an attempt to pull Aria up, only to have Aria grab her around the neck and leg. She dragged Vinyl to the ground, locking her in a small package pin.

One! Two!

Vinyl managed to get her shoulder up in time, just barely. As soon as the pin was broken, Aria dove towards her corner and tagged in Sonata. Sonata rushed into the ring, swinging kicks into Vinyl’s side as soon as she was up. She delivered a stunning roundhouse, knocking Vinyl onto her back. Sonata grabbed Vinyl by the wrist and pulled her to her feet, then leapt into the air and drove both feet directly into her chest. She fell back into the waiting hands of Aria, who wrapped her arms around Vinyl’s waist. With a mighty roar, Aria threw her backwards, slamming her head against the ground as hard as she could. She rolled out of the ring, pointing to Vinyl’s prone body. Sonata nodded in understanding, then quickly scaled the nearby turnbuckle, balancing on the top rope like a cat. She raised her fists over her head, then leapt into the air. She tumbled through the air, backflipping beautifully and landing squarely on Vinyl’s ribs. She hooked Vinyl’s leg up, keeping her shoulders pressed against the mat.

“Impressive shooting star press!” cheered Celestia. “And she hooks the leg!”

One! Two! Three!

The bell sounded, declaring Aria and Sonata as the victors of the bout. Sonata leapt up, running a lap around the ring, blowing kisses to the crowd. Aria leaned over to the timekeeper’s corner, gesturing for a microphone. She ran over and snatched a mic from an announcer, then rolled back into the ring.

“Boo us now!” shouted Aria. “We won, so boo me all you want!” The crowd was happy to oblige, cascading boos down with record volume. “We’re the champions, damn it! You can’t boo me, I’m the champion! The best tag team wrestler on Magic, and there’s nobody who can even compete!” The crowd voiced their disagreement, starting a chant around the arena of “Aria sucks!”. The champion strolled around the ring, her frustration clearly coming to a head.

“Oh, so you doubt me? Is that it? Well, how about this; If there’s anyone backstage with the guts to come face me, why don’t you do it?!” shouted Aria. “This is an open challenge to any team who thinks they’re good enough to take my tag team title from me!” Silence fell over the arena, the crowd waiting with halted breath to see who would possibly accept the challenge. Nothing happened, bringing an evil smirk to Aria’s face. “See? I told you, nobody backstage would dare step up to the plate! I am the best in the world and—”

Yee-haw!

The crowd burst into loud, resounding cheers as two challengers made their way down the ramp, walking with purpose and confidence. The grand stage of performing live in front of thousands may intimidate some, but not them. They held their microphones comfortably.

“Well, Sunset, I was just talking about how much I wanted a shot at those there tag titles,” said one woman, her blonde hair mostly hidden beneath her hat. “And here they go, offering us a title shot.”

“I know. What are the odds, right?” said Sunset, flipping her fiery hair almost mockingly. “But, honestly, it makes sense. I mean, we go so far back. It feels like just yesterday that we were debuting together. Right, Applejack?”

“Right. Feels like just yesterday we were kicking their asses all up and down the ring,” said Applejack, eliciting a cheer from the crowd. “Our first match in the EWF ended with you pinning Big-Head Dazzle right in the middle of the ring, if I recall correctly.”

“And now… They’re tag team champions,” said Sunset. “You stole those belts from us, Dazzlings. You know that they belong on our waists. So you know what we’re going to do?”

“We’re gonna take em.” Applejack and Sunset dropped their mics, taking only five steps forward before another entrance cut them off.

The regal, classy music could scarcely be heard over the blanket of jeers from the crowd. The woman behind the music couldn’t even take a step along the ramp before the crowd started their chant.

Trixie sucks! Trixie sucks!

“Quiet!” shouted Trixie, holding a belt of her own over her shoulder. Unlike the tag belts, this one was made of white leather, and with a stunning platinum plate in the center. The face of the plate read “EWF WORLD CHAMPION”. Though she was champion, Trixie clearly wasn’t dressed to compete; She wore a black business dress and heels to the ring. The crowd’s negativity only increased, but it didn’t seem to matter much to Trixie.

“Last I checked, Monday Night Magic is Trixie’s show,” said Trixie, loud and clear into her mic. “So if anyone is going to be making any matches, it’s going to be me!” She let the boo’s rise, then subside, before she continued on. “Sunset Shimmer, Applejack, are you two really as stupid as you look? You can’t expect me to allow my tag team champions to compete twice in one night, can you?” Sunset recovered her microphone, pointing at the team in the ring.

“They issued an open challenge,” said Sunset. “We accepted.”

“Only problem is that it’s not their challenge to issue. Normally, I’d be content to send you back to the locker room and be done with it.” Again, there was a rise and fall of”Trixie sucks” chants, and again, Trixie brushed them off. “However… A challenge was made… So here’s a compromise. I am setting up the main event for tonight: Adagio Dazzle versus Sunset Shimmer! If Shimmer wins, I guarantee them a title shot next Monday on Magic!”

The crowd cheered, which was very atypical when Trixie was around. Much like before, Trixie didn’t particularly seem to care. She dropped her microphone, raised her championship over her head, then returned up the ramp.

“Things are ever-changing in the EWF,” said Celestia. “As demonstrated by Monday Night Magic’s General Manager Trixie Lulamoon’s sudden decision.”

“Monday Night Magic, the land of opportunity,” chimed Discord. “Tonight, the main event, Adagio Dazzle versus Sunset Shimmer, with the future of the tag team championships hanging in the balance!”

“But up next, some singles competition; The Intercontinental championship match between the current champion, Rarity Valentine, and the challenger, Luna Regal!”

Aria kicked over a chair, shouting angrily at nothing. Adagio pinched the bridge of her nose, shaking her head in disappointment. She let her partner tear apart the locker room, figuring that the sooner Aria got it out of her system, the better. The Dazzlings had taken refuge in the locker room, taking a break after their match. Aria was throwing her fit while her partners sat on a nearby bench, watching the chaos unfold before them.

“God damn it all!” shouted Aria. “Stupid damn GM! Stupid damn fans! Stupid damn Shimmer!”

“Enough!” yelled Adagio. “Shut up! What the hell is wrong with you?! You can’t just go issuing open challenges all will-nilly!”

“It’s my championship, I can do whatever the hell I want,” snarled Aria. “I’m the champ, god damn it!”

“We are the champs, you idiot! Moreover, I am the head of this little group.” Adagio stomped forward, jabbing her finger in Aria’s direction. “And now, you’ve gotten me put in a match that I am in no way prepared for, and, worse still, you’ve put our title reign in jeopardy!”

“Just don’t lose, then! It shouldn’t matter, just don’t lose the match!”

“Look, look, calm down,” said Sonata, slipping between the two and pushing them away. “There’s no point in arguing with each other. Why don’t we just calm down and get ready for tonight. Dag, let’s go get you warmed-up.” Adagio snarled at her partner, clenching her fists. After a tense few moments, she turned to join Sonata by the weights.

“You better make sure I win this match,” said Adagio threateningly. “If we lose these titles… Well, I was doing just fine by myself.”

She walked off, leaving a fuming Aria to return to chucking chairs and belongings around the room.

“Wow,” said Celestia. “A little trouble in paradise. The Dazzlings better get on the same page, for their own sake.”

“But, for now, we have ourselves an Intercontinental Championship match,” said Discord. “Could Rarity Valentine finally relinquish her title? I don’t know, but what I know for sure is that the challenger is definitely the favorite in this match.”

“I think you may be discounting the champion too soon,” argued Celestia. “Ever since winning the championship, Rarity Valentines’s skill in the ring has improved, and—”

“I was referring to you, Celestia. You must favor Luna, her being your sister and all.”

“I favor only two things, Discord, those two things being talent in the ring and a respect for the sport,” said Celestia dryly. “And Luna just happens to have both. Our relationship is irrelevant.”

There’s a Nightmare inside!

The loud blare of a guitar and the vicious pounding of drums rang throughout the arena. Down from the ramp strolled the challenger: a strong, blue-haired, ponytailed woman in dark blue tights. She stretched out her arms, shaking hands with fans on the way down the ramp. She hopped onto the apron, then ducked under the top rope and bounced into ring. She cracked her knuckles and tugged on the ropes, waiting impatiently for her opponent.

The first few somber notes of a piano tune floated out, which quickened into the epic march theme of the current Intercontinental Champion. Her top and trunks were sapphire blue, matching with her eyes and hair. She held an ovoid plated belt over her head, the EWF Intercontinental Championship. The crowd’s reaction was mostly mixed, though it was easier to pick out boo’s than cheers. The champion didn’t let it slow her; she elegantly stepped up the steel steps and bowed over the bottom rope to enter the ring.

“The following contest,” called the announcer. “Is scheduled for one-fall, and it is for the EWF Intercontinental Championship. Introducing first, the challenger, from Canterlot City, weighing in at 195 pounds, The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

Luna raised her arm above her head, ignoring the cheers that floated around the arena. She was focused on the gold that her opponent slung over her shoulder.

“And her opponent, from Canterlot City, weighing in at 146 pounds, she is the EWF Intercontinental Champion… RARITY VALENTINE!”

Rarity raised her championship over her head, letting the crowd get a nice, good, long look at the prestigious championship. She basked in the boos, then handed the belt to the referee. The official turned the belt towards Luna, then to Rarity, then raised it up to the crowd before leaning out of the ring and passing it to the timekeeper. The bell rang, and the two competitors locked up.

Luna took control at first, using her slight size advantage to overpower Rarity and push her into the corner. She didn’t relent her force, at which point the referee intervened. He squeezed in between the two, trying to force them apart. Rarity noticed that the referee was preoccupied, and used that opportunity to quickly poke Luna in the eye.

“Ooh, the referee missed the eye poke,” noted Discord. “Luna better keep her eye on that one, hm?”

“That… In any case, we should focus on the match,” said Celestia, shaking her head. “Luna is looking understandably annoyed. Whether or not Valentine intended to anger her opponent, she should tread carefully. Luna is dangerous enough on a good day, but she can be downright lethal when angry.”

Luna stumbled back, clutching her face in agony. Rarity grinned as she moved forward, stopping a few feet from Luna. She took a deep, mocking bow, her grin growing as did Luna’s frown. The challenger jumped forward quickly, catching Rarity in the side of the head with a stiff hook. She introduced the champion’s jaw with another hard punch, then a big boot that flattened Rarity.

“See what I mean?” said Celestia. “I hazard to say that, once Luna gets going, she can’t be stopped.”

“If anyone can stop her, then, it’ll be the Patron Saint of the Ring,” said Discord. “Saint Valentine is nothing to be trifled with.”

Rarity quickly scurried to her feet, blocking Luna’s next strike and countering with her own. The two traded blows, hook after hook until Rarity finally managed to work in a stiff kick to Luna’s leg. The challenger buckled to one knee, at which point Rarity kicked out the other leg. She grinned, then gave another mocking bow. Rarity smashed her elbow into the side of Luna’s head, laying her flat.

“And, just like that, Rarity Valentine drops her opponent!” called Discord. “Luna looks to be out cold!”

“You’re underestimating the challenger,” noted Celestia. “I know Luna better than I know just about anyone, and she’s tougher than that.”

Rarity dragged Luna to the middle of the ring, then dropped on top of her in a full mount. Rarity rained fist after fist down onto a defenseless Luna, stopping only when she thought it prudent to switch up her offense. She pulled Luna’s arm to the side, then stomped harshly onto the elbow. She ran and rebounded off of the ropes, then dropped an elbow into Luna’s gut.

“After the initial attack by Luna, Rarity appears to be having her way with her opponent,” said Discord. “A big change is gonna have to be made if we want to see a new champion tonight.”

Almost as if caused by that very sentence, Luna began working her way back to her feet. She made it to all fours before Rarity lazily kicked her to the ground. Again, Luna battled her way to her hands and knees, only to have Rarity slap her across the face and bring her right back where she started. Rarity turned to the crowd and bowed, smiling while she did.

Rarity returned to her prey, grabbing Luna by the hair. She mocked Luna, slapping her across the face and peppering her with insults. Luna swung at Rarity, barely missing her each and every time. Rarity tugged one more time at Luna’s hair, which was enough to push her over the edge. Luna forced herself to her feet, then thrusted a palm into Rarity’s throat. She hit Rarity twice more in the throat, then delivered a firm headbutt which dropped the champion like a stone. Luna ripped her scrunchie out of her ponytail, letting her hair drop loose.

As soon as Rarity was on her feet, Luna leapt onto her and pelted her with a flurry of fists. Rarity was defenseless to Luna’s onslaught, having no choice but to endure the hailstorm of blows.

Luna stood up and let out a manic roar, her shout infecting the arena with a wild, uncontrollable energy. The look in Luna’s eye had changed. Before, she was laser focused and calm. Now, she moved like a beast, savagely swinging at her opponent with no rhyme or reason.

“And now Luna, back on the offensive,” said Celestia. “She's slipped into that zone of hers, almost as if she's become a different person!”

Luna didn't stop there; She dropped knee after knee onto Rarity’s leg. She dragged her over to the ropes, draping Rarity’s leg over the middle rope. She grabbed Rarity ankle and bended it, applying pressure to the champion’s right knee.

“This side of Luna is a whole different competitor than she was before,” said Discord. “And, I gotta say, I like this one a lot better. The ferocity! The savagery! The ring-smarts! The way she utilizes every single second of the referee’s five-count is the difference between a good wrestler and a great one.”

“Also, notice how she focuses her onslaught on Rarity’s knee,” pointed out Celestia. “It appears that Luna is trying to weaken the leg, one of Rarity’s most dangerous assets. How many opponents have we seen Rarity put away with that figure-four leglock of hers?”

“More than I can count, so, if Luna were to take out that leg, she’d severely cripple the champion’s offense.”

Rarity clutched her right leg, her face twisted up in agony. Luna took just a moment to take a breather before resuming her onslaught. She stomped brutally on the injured leg one last time before dropping down and pinning Rarity to the mat.

One! Two!

Rarity managed to get her shoulder up in time, though just barely. Luna dragged Rarity to her feet, bending the champion over at the waist. She turned her back to Rarity’s head and hooked her arms, then twisted and hoisted Rarity up into the air, suspending her upside down.

“Luna preparing to end the match, going for the Eternal Night,” said Celestia. Rarity managed to fight her way out, flipping onto her feet. “But the champion manages to escape Luna’s devastating finishing move.”

Before Luna could turn around, Rarity dove for the ground and drove her elbow into her opponent’s knee. Luna tumbled, which was just the opening Rarity needed. She twisted Luna’s leg, bending her right leg over her left, and cinching in the figure-four leglock.

“And she’s got it locked in! The figure-four!” cheered Discord. “Title reigns have ended because of this move! And Luna, in the middle of the ring, has nowhere to go!”

“But, as you can see, Rarity is clearly favoring that right knee,”chimed Celestia. “I don’t know if she has it locked in as securely as she might like. She’s not quite at 100%.”

“Rarity Valentine at 50% is still better than most competitors at 100. You shouldn’t ever lower your guard around Valentine.”

Just as Celestia had said, Rarity’s submission hold wasn’t perfectly locked in, and Luna was able to fight her way out with relative ease. Luna scurried backwards, taking a moment to catch her breath. The champion fought her way to her feet, clutching her right leg gingerly. She put some pressure on the leg, testing its strength. When she was sure she could stand indefinitely, she set her sights on Luna.

The two met in the middle of the ring, grabbing each other into an elbow-collar tie up. They struggled for control of the hold for a bit before Rarity took control and slipped Luna into a side headlock. She wrenched down firmly, driving Luna down to one knee. The challenger clubbed Rarity savagely on the back, the single strike almost enough to force Rarity to release the hold. Luna battered her opponent’s back three more times, each blow loosening the hold by a considerable amount. Luna shoved Rarity away, sending the champion rebounding off of the ropes. Before Luna could even move, Rarity drove her right knee into Luna’s nose.

“A picture-perfect knee from the champion!” cheered Discord. “This could be just what she needs to get the match’s momentum back in her favor.”

“I’m unsure as to who got off worse in that exchange,” said Celestia skeptically. “Rarity seems to be in serious pain after that.”

Rarity clutched her right knee, slamming her fist against the mat in frustration. She pushed the pain she was experiencing to the back of her mind, forcing herself to stand. She limped over to Luna, grabbed her up by the hair and delivered a firm hook to the jaw of the challenger. She delivered a stiff elbow to Luna’s head, then another, and another, until Luna was pressed back into the corner. Rarity backed up, then ran forward and leapt onto Luna, burying her knees into the challengers chest and monkey flipping her back. Quickly seizing her opportunity, Rarity climbed to the top rope with her back facing Luna. She took in a deep breath, then leapt back and flipped forward through the air, doing a bit more than a full rotation.

“A stunning imploder 450 splash by the champion!” called Discord. “And she goes for the cover!”

One! Two!

Luna brought her shoulder up from the mat with no time to spare. Rarity’s frustration was clearly visible, frustration which she took out on her opponent. She descended onto Luna and rained hard right hands onto her face. Luna shoved her off and scurried to her feet. She charged at the champion, who ducked down and tripped Luna with a drop toe hold. Immediately, Rarity flipped her onto her back and twisted her legs into another figure four. This time, the hold was nice and secure.

“That’s gotta be the match,” said Discord. “Rarity’s got that figure four locked in, and Luna’s in the middle of the ring with nowhere to go! She’s gonna tap, I know it!”

Luna shouted in pain, trying futilely to make her way to the ropes and force a break. Unfortunately for Luna, Rarity had played it smart, keeping them anchored in the center of the ring. Luna’s trembling hand hovered a few inches from the mat, threatening to submit.

Let’s go Luna, Valentine sucks! Let’s go Luna, Valentine sucks!

Luna clenched her fist, punching the ground to distract her from the pain. The crowd’s chants filled her with vigor, an energy she needed to turn the match around. She teetered and turned, eventually tipping both Rarity and herself onto their stomachs. With impressive athleticism, Luna pushed herself to her knees, then arched back and hooked her hands beneath Rarity’s chin.

“The Tantabus!” called Celestia, leaping out of her seat. Luna tugged wildly at Rarity’s head, wrenching down with all the pressure she could muster. “Luna’s locked in the Tantabus! Nowhere to go, no way to break the hold!”

Rarity held her hand up high, fighting as hard as she could to resist the urge to tap. Try as she might, the pain grew too great, and the champion slapped the mat in rapid succession. The bell rang and Luna immediately broke the hold. She leapt up raising her arms over her head as the crowd cheered her on.

“The winner, and the new EWF Intercontinental Champion…” shouted the announcer. “The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

The referee delivered the championship to Luna, who excitedly held it over her head. The crowd cheered for her, the applause downright thunderous. Luna rolled out of the ring, ran around to the commentator’s table and jumped into Celestia’s arms.

“Oh my… Erm… Luna Regal, finally claiming her first ever EWF championship,” said Celestia, awkwardly hugging her sister. “She’s worked hard, and I can think of no competitor who deserves this title more.”

“An incredible match with an incredible result,” said Discord. “We’ve got ourselves a new champion! Luna Regal, finally capturing the Intercontinental championship in a long, hard-fought battle.”

Luna stood atop the commentator’s table, holding her new title over her head. She grinned widely, basking in the glow of her victory.

“A historic night for Monday night Magic, for sure,” said Celestia. “A night to be all the more memorable for our next match; two titans of the industry clash for the first time ever to decide the #1 contender for Ember Torch’s EWF National Championship; The Equalizer, Starlight Glimmer versus The Outrageous Pinkamena Diane Pie!”

“You got this, Shim,” said Applejack, holding up her palms. “You're better than her. You've always been better than her. Now, you just gotta show it.”

Sunset jabbed at her partner’s hands, slipping into form in preparation for her match. She was ready to take the championship she had worked so hard for. She cursed her shoulder, not for the last time. If it weren't for her injury, they would be Tag Team champions right now. They were in the backstage area, getting some last minute training in. Sunset wanted to be at 100% for her match tonight.

“It's not Big Head I'm worried about. Unless she plans to pin me with her ego,” said Sunset. “It's Blaze. She's a snake in the grass.”

“We get snakes on the farm all the time. I'm mighty good at dealing with them.”

“Thanks, AJ. Glad to have you in my corner.”

Applejack dropped her hands, suddenly standing straight up. She walked past Sunset, not stopping until she was nose to nose with the approaching Aria Blaze.

“What do you want, Blaze?” said Applejack.

“You made a mistake by challenging us,” said Aria.

“Or maybe you made a mistake by challenging me,” said Sunset. She nudged Applejack’s elbow, signalling her to step back. Though Sunset was much smaller than her partner, she was equally intimidating, if not more.

“Sit this match out, Shimmy,” said Aria. “Before you get your shoulder injured. Again.”

“You making threats?” Sunset took a menacing step forward.

“No. I'm making promises.”

Aria swiftly clubbed down on Sunset’s shoulder, dropping her to the floor. Aria swiped twice more, then delivered a stiff kick to Sunset’s arm before Applejack could so much as swing for her. Aria ducked, then hurried out of the training room, easily outrunning the much larger Applejack. Sunset groaned in pain, clutching her shoulder gingerly.

“Damn it!” Sunset grabbed Applejack by the wrist, stopping her from running after Aria.

“Leave her,” grunted Sunset. “Help me tape this up. I gotta be ready for this match.”

“Shim, you can’t be serious,” said Applejack. “Your arm, it ain’t in good shape. You shouldn’t be back in the ring at all. I’m calling Trixie and having her cancel the match.”

“Like hell you are! I’m doing this!”

“I’m not letting you hospitalize yourself like this!” She yanked her arm from Sunset’s grasp, going for the door. Sunset grabbed her again, tighter this time.

“AJ. What did I say to you before I went in for surgery?” asked Sunset. Applejack shook her head.

“No. You don’t have to do this. I won’t let you kill yourself.”

“I said that, as soon as I stepped back under an EWF roof, I’m going to win us those tag team championships. I put us on the shelf for months, and I promised that I’d make it up to you.” She let go of Applejack, stretching out her injured arm. “Now, do you want to make me a liar?”

“Hell naw…”

“Do you want to be champions?”

“Hell yeah.”

“You want to kick some Dazzling ass?” Sunset pushed Applejack firmly, grinning as her partner bounced up and down with a fiery new energy.

“Hell yeah!”

“Then let’s get ready to go put some boots to asses!”

“Hell yeah!”

“That grit, that perseverance, that determination,” said Celestia, barely able to think over the crowd’s “Hell yeah” chants. “Those are the hallmarks of a future champion.”

“To be competing so soon after a torn rotator cuff, and she’s gunning for the titles,” said Discord, shaking his head. “Perhaps if the champions were lesser competitors, but Sunset Shimmer is challenging some of the most talented and vicious up-and-coming stars the EWF has ever seen. It’s suicide!”

“We’ll have to sit tight to see how Sunset manages to deal with the Dazzlings, but now…” said Celestia. “Now, a number one contender’s match for the EWF Nationals championship.”

Right on cue, a snare drum roll sounded throughout the arena, bleeding into a militaristic march. The competitor who accompanied the music wore a set of black tights, with a grey equal sign plastered across the butt. She moved with purpose, not even glancing at the fans that were peppering her with boos. She rolled into the ring, tugging on the ropes to test the tension as she waited for her opponent.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall, and it is a number one contender’s match for the EWF Nationals Championship! Introducing first, from Our Town, weighing in at 162 pounds… The Equalizer, STARLIGHT GLIMMER!”

Starlight stared right down the aisle, not paying attention to anything but her next potential victim.

The arena was filled with the blare of an accordion, followed by a loud, resounding cheer from the crowd. A peppy, polka tune began to play, and Starlight’s opponent made herself known.

Though she was a bit on the larger side, she moved like a woman half her size, skipping and cartwheeling down the aisle. She wore a light blue top with blue and pink striped tights, which agreed with her bright smile and general bubbly demeanor. After running up and down the ramp twice to give as many fans her love as possible, she hopped up to the apron and front-flipped into the ring.

“And her opponent, from Rockville, weighing in at 266 pounds, the Outrageous PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!”

Pinkie did a little bow, then enthusiastically offered her hand to her opponent in a show of friendly sportsmanship. Starlight stared at it like a dead rat. She brought her hands up, ready for the match, while Pinkie shrugged and adopted a similar stance. The bell rang, and the two women locked up in the middle of the ring.

“And we’re off, both competitors vying for control early on here,” said Celestia. “Pinkamena, quite possibly the most unique competitor we have here in the EWF, taking control with a firm strike to the head.”

Pinkie battered her opponent in the head three times before sliding under Starlight’s arms and grasping her around the waist. She hoisted her up, then slammed her down onto her stomach. She shimmied around, delivering a firm knee to Starlight’s shoulder.

“Standing switch into a takedown, followed by a stiff knee from Pie,” reported Discord. “As you said, Pie is possibly the strangest of the strange here at the EWF, she is a woman of many hats.”

“Indeed,” agreed Celestia. “A former comedian turned baker turned plus-size model turned professional wrestler. But don’t let her size fool you, because Pinkamena Pie is more agile than just about every other woman on the roster.” Almost as if to illustrate that point, Pinkie rolled back to her feet, did a flipping leap into the air, and buried her boots into Starlight’s lower back.

“Stunning frontflip double boot stomp by Pie, Glimmer finally back to her feet,” said Discord. “Another lockup, this time The Equalizer seems determined to take control.”

This time, when Pinkie slipped under Starlight’s arm, Starlight clasped on a tight side headlock. She wrenched pressure downwards, forcing Pinkie to her knees while Starlight took time to catch her breath.

“And Glimmer slowing down the pace here, a smart move,” said Celestia. “A slow, methodical approach like Starlight Glimmer’s might be the only thing short of a miracle that can stop Pinkamena once she gets going.”

Starlight seemed to know this, as she made no attempt to pick up the pace. She kept her hold cinched in, draining the life from her opponent with every passing second. Pinkie forced herself back to her feet, clubbing Starlight in the back to no effect.

“Pie is really going to have to make a change if she’s going to get back into this match,” noted Discord. “She can’t possibly expect to win from that position.”

Pinkie stomped her foot on the mat, then again, and again, the crowd joining in after a bit. The rhythm increased with time, the sheer noise and energy giving Pinkie strength. She turned to face Starlight, then grabbed the top of her head. She put her own head beneath Starlight’s jaw and dropped to her knees.

“And Pinkamena’s back in the fight after a hard jawbreaker,” called Celestia. Pinkie was back to her feet in an instant and immediately went to work, raining down hard right hands on her opponent. She grabbed Starlight by the wrist and threw her to the ropes. Starlight rebounded and felt Pinkie’s head strike her square in the chest, laying her out on her back.

Starlight scurried to her feet, clutching her chest breathlessly. She studied her opponent, annoyed by the bright grin that seemed determined to stay on Pinkie’s face. Starlight decided that, one way or another, she would get rid of that grin. The two began to circle each other, looking for an opening. Not seeing one, Pinkie decided to make her own.

She dove for Starlight’s leg, arching her right foot behind her with unbelievable flexibility. Starlight blocked low, so focused with Pinkie’s dive that she could do nothing about the boot that was coming towards her chest. Pinkie followed her impressive display by pressing her hands against the mat and launching herself to her feet.

“And an incredible Scorpion Kick by Pinkamena, just look at that athleticism!” said Celestia. “Who would have thought that a girl that size could move like that?”

“That girl is a freak of nature, that’s for sure,” said Discord. “She shouldn’t be able to do half of the things she does!”

Starlight was getting frustrated. She couldn’t seem to get a read on Pinkie. Her speed was uncanny, almost impossible to predict. She cracked her knuckles before rushing at her opponent. Pinkie ducked, then, when Starlight turned around, struck her in the chest with a heavy palm strike. Her opponent stunned, Pinkie grabbed Starlight around the back of the neck and slammed her own head into Starlight’s face. She followed her headbutt with another, then another, picking up speed until she had struck Starlight eight times, dropping her to the ground when she was through.

“And the Stun Gun Headbutts from Pie, cover,” called Discord. “One, two, and a kickout at two. Starlight can’t be feeling too good after that vicious barrage of headbutts.”

“I’ve interviewed some of Pinkamena’s opponents after being on the receiving end of that move,” reported Celestia. “Many compare the Stun Gun Headbutts to dropping a bowling ball on your head.”

“Somehow, I’m not surprised to hear that Pie has an abnormally thick skull,” said Discord with a roll of the eyes.

Pinkie grabbed Starlight by the wrist and dragged her to her feet, then threw her towards the ropes. When she rebounded, Starlight brought a smashing elbow to Pinkie’s face, dropping her like a stone. Starlight stomped with all of her might on Pinkie’s ankle, immediately dropping down for a pin.

One!

“Easy kickout by Pinkamena Pie,” said Celestia. “It’ll take a lot more than that to keep her down for the three count.” Starlight grabbed Pinkie’s leg and turned her onto her stomach, hooked her leg behind her and sat on Pinkie’s back, tugging the leg and applying insane pressure to Pinkie’s back and leg.

“Glimmer’s got the single leg Boston Crab locked in,” said Discord. “Pie, in the middle of the ring, with nowhere to go!”

Pinkie reached for the bottom rope, hoping to force a break. Starlight, too ring savvy to allow that to happen, planted them both firmly in the center of the ring. Pinkie’s options were limited to two: power her way out or submit.

“Look at the strength on display!” said Celestia, watching in awe as Pinkie pushed herself (and, by extension, Starlight) up with her hands. Pinkie pushed up, walking herself back with her hands until she was upside down and Starlight was standing. Starlight stood, shocked and confused, as Pinkie threw herself into the air, grabbed Starlight over the neck and buried her skull into the mat.

“Incredible! Party Favor DDT!” cheered Discord, even he finding himself impressed by the “freak of nature” in the ring. “Never in my life have I seen a single leg Boston Crab get reversed into a DDT!”

“But that might have been all the gas that Pinkamena had left in her tank,” said Celestia. “She is, as they say, down for the count.”

One!

Two!

Three!

Both Pinkie and Starlight fought to stand, every drop of energy left in their bodies being used to push themselves up.

Four!

Five!

Six!

Seven!

At the referee’s count of seven, both competitors found their way to a vertical base. Pinkie swung a hard, stiff right hand into Starlight’s head, dazing her opponent.

Yeah!

Starlight touched her lip, checking for blood. She clenched her fist and swung as hard as she could, connecting with Pinkie’s jaw.

Boo!

The two traded blows, with the crowd cheering for every bit of Pinkie’s offense and booing for all of Starlight’s. As the cheers grew louder, so too did the punches grow harder, until, eventually, Starlight Glimmer had dropped her opponent. Starlight grabbed Pinkie by the hair, dragging her to her feet.

Pinkie rammed her head forward, bashing into Starlight’s stomach. Pinkie bent her over at the waist, then slipped Starlight’s head between her legs.

“Pinkamena looks to be trying to end this!” called Celestia. “Setting up for the ED, this will surely… Wait a moment, who the hell is that?!”

A girl smaller than both Pinkie and Starlight leapt from the crowd, clutching a steel folding chair. She slid into the ring and smashed the chair against Pinkie’s back, the crack of steel against spine resonating throughout the arena. The referee called for the bell to end the match, but could do nothing to stop the interference from battering Pinkie again and again with the chair.

“That’s… That’s Ember Torch!” called Discord. “The EWF Nationals champion just ruined this match!”

“I-I don’t understand! Why would she do this?” asked Celestia. “Where did Ember even come from?”

Ember grabbed Starlight by the wrist and aided her to her feet. Starlight looked around, groggy and confused, before Ember rammed the chair into Starlight’s middle. Ember smashed the chair against the back of Starlight’s head, crumpling the chair until it hardly resembled its original form.

Ember raised her fists above her head, the chair clattering to the mat. She rolled out of the ring, then hopped the barricade and left the arena the same way she entered.

“This is poppycock! I wanted to see the end of that match, damn it!” shouted Discord. “A disqualification? Who's the #1 contender? Who challenges Ember?”

“Hold on, word is coming in now,” said Celestia, touching her earpiece. “I've just received word from General Manager Trixie Lulamoon, stating that the number one contender for the Nationals Championship will be decided this Friday on Ascension!”

“But, for now, it's time to get ready for the main event!” said Discord. “Sunset Shimmer vs Adagio Dazzle and, if Shimmer wins, she and her partner earn a shot at the EWF Tag-team Championships! That's next…”

Sonata bounced up and down in her dressing room, preparing herself for the coming match. Though she wasn't competing, she had to be at her very best. If she was able to cheer loud enough, Adagio would win for sure.

A knock at the door took Sonata away from her preparations.

“It's open!” said Sonata, dropping down in front of her mirror to fix her hair. The door clicked open, and in stepped Applejack. Sonata looked at her uneasily through the mirror, but stood where she sat.

“Howdy, Nata,” said Applejack.

“You shouldn't be here,” said Sonata. Applejack nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Neither should you,” said Applejack. “You should be with a partner that keeps you on the right side of the law.”

“Aria and Adagio are my family. We look out for each other. I can't leave them. They're the reason I'm here. The reason I'm a champion.”

“What about next Monday? When Sunny and I take the belts,” said Applejack. “Still think they'll be looking after you then?”

“I think that you'll never get your title shot, because Adagio is going to win,” said Sonata. Applejack gently placed a hand on Sonata’s shoulder.

“Look, Sonata. You're a good kid, and an even better wrestler,” she said. “Don't throw away your career for those two leeches holding you back.”

Sonata stood up, shaking free of Applejack’s grasp.

“AJ, it's been nice talking to you, but you really need to go. I need to get ready to support my friend,” said Sonata. “Maybe you should do the same.”

“Alright, Sonata. I'll get out of your hair.” Applejack stopped in the doorway. “Me and Sunny miss ya, kid. Take care of yourself.”

Sonata looked down, saying nothing to Applejack. When she heard the door click shut, she stared in the mirror.

“Alright, Sony,” she said to herself. “It's showtime.”

The loud blare of a guitar cut through the arena, starting up the crowd. Down the ramp strolled Applejack and Sunset, the latter of whom had her right shoulder braced with thin black tape. Sunset rotated her shoulder, making sure that she was still okay to compete, then ran up and down the ramp. She interacted with the fans, posing for pictures and even signing a shirt.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Making her way to the ring, accompanied by Applejack, from Canterlot City, weighing in at 155 pounds, The Demon, SUNSET SHIMMER!”

Sunset rolled into the ring, jumping to the middle rope and bouncing idly. She pointed up the ramp, then pointed to the mat, making her intentions clear. She was winning this match, injured shoulder or no.

Now, you’re under our spell…

Oh-whoa-oh, oh-whoa-oh

Adagio and Aria stomped down the ramp, neither willing to look at each other. Sonata joined them after a beat, just as usual, but the trio's entrance was different. Their synergy was off, which would no doubt impact Adagio’s performance in the ring.

“And her opponent, accompanied by Aria Blaze and Sonata Dusk, from The Black Sea, weighing in at 191 pounds, ADAGIO DAZZLE!”

Sonata raised her forearm, offering it to Adagio. After a moment of consideration, Adagio returned the greeting, touching arms with her partner. She locked eyes with Aria, staring her down. The two sighed, then repeated the forearm bump.

Adagio stepped into the ring, strafing Sunset in an attempt to find an opening. Applejack stood by ringside, as did Aria and Sonata, cheering on their partner.

“And we're off,” said Celestia as the bell rang. “This is bound to be an interesting match. Sunset Shimmer and Adagio Dazzle had their debuting match together, with Sunset walking away victorious. Time to see if history repeats itself.”

Sunset grabbed Adagio in a lockup, the latter reversing into a side headlock. Sunset twirled around, her back to Adagio’s, and hooked their arms together. She dropped to her knees and arched herself forward, pressing Adagio’s shoulders to the mat.

One!

Though taken off guard, Adagio managed to kick out. Seeing an opportunity and not to be outdone, Adagio went for a roll-up of her own; in one fluid movement, she slipped her head beneath Sunset’s belly, flipping them both over and hooking Sunset’s legs for the pin.

One! Two!

Sunset brought her shoulder up just in time, but didn't get a chance to counter; as soon as the pin was broken, Adagio dropped down and rained hard strikes onto Sunset’s head. She grabbed Sunset by the hair and slammed her head against the mat.

“And Dazzle in the driver's seat of this match, always been a superior striker to Sunset,” said Celestia. “But Sunset Shimmer possesses this rare ability to reach into some unknown place and somehow find the energy to keep fighting when a lesser competitor would be empty.”

Sunset scurried to her feet, rotating her shoulder again. She grabbed Adagio, managing to overpower her and take control of the hold. She dropped an elbow on the back of Adagio’s neck, then brought a knee up to her nose. When Adagio’s neck snapped up, Sunset grabbed her around the neck and dropped to her knees, thrusting her right shoulder into the back of Adagio’s neck. As soon as she did, Sunset clutched her shoulder in pain.

“Shoulder neckbreaker from The Demon, though she looks like she might be regretting that decision,” said Discord. “I don’t care what she says, that shoulder is not at 100%”

Adagio pushed herself to her feet, massaging her neck gingerly. She quickly dropped an elbow onto Sunset’s injured shoulder, then targeted the injured area with dropping knee strikes. Adagio stepped on Sunset’s shoulder, applying her full weight to her opponent. She raised her hands, grinning sadistically at the howls of pain from the woman beneath her. She stepped off of Sunset, then dropped down for the pin.

One! Two!

Sunset brought her good shoulder up, unable to make her way to her feet at the current moment. Adagio brought Sunset to her feet, grabbing her by the wrist and elbowing the injured shoulder. She twisted Sunset’s arm, then rammed Sunset’s shoulder with her own.

“Regardless of how you feel about about her ethics, you cannot deny Adagio Dazzle’s ring-smarts,” said Discord. “She is laser-focused on that shoulder of Sunset Shimmer’s, which is certainly the intelligent thing to do. It’s hard to kick out of a pin when your shoulder doesn’t work.”

“I don’t think there’s much of anything that can stop Sunset Shimmer,” said Celestia as Adagio clasped her hand firmly against Sunset’s shoulder, wrenching pressure on her opponent. “Sunset won’t let anything stop her from taking those tag team championships.”

Applejack slammed her hands against the mat, urging her partner to somehow fight free of the hold. She locked eyes with Sunset, continuously slapping the ground and filling Sunset, herself, and the entire arena with a fiery energy. Encouraged by the crowd’s cheers, Sunset stomped her foot, slowly forcing her way up. She grabbed Adagio around the top of the head and dropped to her butt, ramming her head into Adagio’s jaw.

“And Sunset back in this fight with a jawbreaker,” called Celestia. “Quick cover from Sunset, even quicker kick out from Adagio Dazzle, now both women back to their feet and trying to find a way to best the other.”

Sunset clutched her injured shoulder, clearly doubting herself. She was starting to think that she was too quick to come back from surgery. She should have rested more.

She glanced once at her partner, remembering her promise, then pushed the pain out of her mind. She had to win this match, and she wasn't about to let a bit of shoulder pain stop her.

Adagio ran at Sunset, missing as she ducked under the incoming clothesline. Sunset laid in with quick jabs to the midsection, followed by a stiff roundhouse to the back of the head. Adagio dropped to her knees, which gave Sunset the opening she needed. She ran to the ropes, stopping in her tracks when she saw Aria standing on the apron, waiting for her. Sunset turned around to focus on Adagio and walked directly into a fierce clothesline.

Applejack grabbed Aria by the ankles, pulling her down to the ground. Immediately, Applejack began shouting at Aria.

“Stay where you can't screw up the match!” yelled Applejack. “This fight is between them, so butt out!”

“Why don't you make me, farmgirl?” sneered Aria.

“I'm about to lay you out in a second!”

“Guys, come on,” said Sonata, approaching Applejack from behind. “Just let them go at it in the ring, we can—”

Aria ran forward and launched a Superkick forward, aiming for Applejack’s jaw. Applejack managed to sidestep the kick, which found a home on Sonata’s face. She hit the ground, laying flat on her back.

“You idiot!” shouted Adagio. She grabbed the rope, leaning her top half over to properly yell at her partner. “You're supposed to hit the cowgirl, not Sonata! Why must you ruin everything!”

Suddenly, Adagio felt a hand grab her tights. Before she could react, Sunset yanked her down and rolled her onto her back, pinning her shoulders to the mat.

“Schoolboy pin!” shouted Celestia.

One! Two! Three!

Sunset leapt to her feet, punching the sky as the bell rang and declared her the victor. She rolled out of the ring, jumping into Applejack’s arms excitedly. Adagio scurried to her feet, not entirely sure what had happened.

“Sunset Shimmer, with a sneaky pin, stole a win right from underneath Adagio Dazzle’s nose!” said Discord. “She won it, thanks in part to Aria Blaze, as strange as that may be!”

Applejack carried Sunset around the ring, both of them pumping their fists in the air and celebrating with the crowd. Sunset dropped to her feet, grinning madly. Applejack grabbed her wrist and raised her hand above her head, pointing the victor of the match. Meanwhile, Adagio rolled out of the ring to argue with Aria. As the two went back and forth, Sonata slowly worked her way up to diffuse the situation.

“The Dazzlings better start singing the same tune if they want to hold on to those championships,” said Celestia. “Otherwise, Sunset and Applejack will surely take them.”

“That title match is next week, on Monday Night Magic,” said Discord. “Until then, EWF Universe, this has been Celestia Regal and Discord Redrum, wishing you a good night!”

Author's Notes:

This is a bit of an experimental story to see if a text-based wrestling show could ever realistically work. This story has been a massive undertaking, so I'd appreciate if you told me what you thought of the idea.

Special thanks to Disel Delta and Prince Conjure, without whom, this story would never have escaped the confines of my brain.

See you on Friday!

Friday Night Ascension

Twilight Sparkle sat in her office, looking over her files and papers. Her office was simple, with nothing more than her desk, two seats in front of her for her employees during evaluations, a filing cabinet, and a row of photos on the wall. The photos depicted several wrestlers, each posing with the prestigious EWF World Championship. Among those champions were herself and, at the very end, Trixie Lulamoon. Every now and then, Twilight would glance at Trixie’s photo and grimace, then return to her paperwork.

A knock at the door stole Twilight’s attention away from her work and her reminiscing.

“It's open,” she said. The door blew open, and Starlight Glimmer stormed into the room. She glared at Twilight, who peered back at her over the frames of her reading glasses.

“May I help you?” said Twilight.

“Ember Torch screwed me over,” said Starlight. “I got disqualified for interference even though I obviously had nothing to do with Ember attacking Pie! Now, I'm out of a title match that I earned, fair and square.”

“I understand your frustration, Starlight,” said Twilight. “And yes, I'm aware that you did not condone or command Ember’s attack on Pinkie. Unfortunately, I cannot change the rules. An outside force struck a competitor, therefore, the attacked competitor receives a disqualification victory.”

“That's completely unfair!” shouted Starlight. “I deserve that title match!”

“I can see why you believe that, but I don’t think that we can ever be sure. I watched that match and, from where I was sitting, it seemed as if Pinkie was about to put you away,” said Twilight. “But, as I said, we'll never know for sure. Now, I don't feel comfortable granting Pinkie a title match for that win. That said, you lost the match, regardless of the circumstances. So I can't really give it to you, either. That wouldn't be fair.”

“‘Scuse me, Twilight!”

Pinkie slipped into the room, all but dancing her way to Twilight’s desk.

“Ah, Pinkie, good of you to drop in. I needed to speak with you,” said Twilight. “It's about your match with Starlight this past Monday.”

“Whoa, that's crazy! That's what I wanted to talk about, too!” said Pinkie. “Are we, like, psychically linked or something?”

“I don't think so, Pinkie.”

“Look at her! She's a joke!” growled Starlight. “She's not worthy of the title!”

“I'm not a joke, silly, I’m a wrestler! But I know a bunch of good jokes! How about this one?” said Pinkie. “A Starlight and a Pinkie walk into a ring. The Pinkie offers to shake hands, but the Starlight is a bad sport and doesn’t wanna. So, the Pinkie hits the Starlight with an Equestrian Destroyer and pins her in the middle of the ring!” Pinkie giggled, genuinely amused by her own “joke”. “Isn't that funny?”

“I'm going to eviscerate you, Pie,” snarled Starlight.

“Easy, girls,” said Twilight. “Jumping at each other's throat won't bring us any closer to a solution. Now, as far as I'm concerned, your performance Monday was amazing enough to earn either of you a title shot. However, I cannot in good conscious give either of you a title opportunity because of the… shaky outcome of the match itself. Pinkie technically won on Magic, but there's nothing to suggest that you would have done so without interference. So, like I said earlier, I cannot comfortably grant either of you a title shot.”

“I have an idea!” said Pinkie suddenly.

“Cram it, Pie,” snarled Starlight. “If your idea is as bad as your joke, I think we'll actually get further from a solution.”

“Look, Starlight, I'm not entirely sure of the ins and outs of how Trixie runs her show,” said Twilight. “But, here on Ascension, everyone's thoughts are considered and everyone's ideas have merit. So, Pinkie, what's your idea?”

“Alright, so you say you can't give either of us a title match,” said Pinkie. “But what if you gave both of us a title match? At the same time!”

“A Triple Threat match…” Twilight tapped her chin in thought. “Well, that would give you both the opportunity you deserve… Plus, it'll make things a bit more difficult for Ember. I needed to have a chat with her about her interference anyway. What better way to make a statement?” She smiled, pulling her glasses and folding them over her shirt. “Brilliant, Pinkie. I'll put the match together now: Ember Torch versus Starlight Glimmer versus Pinkamena Pie for the Nationals Championship!”

“Awesome!” cheered Pinkie. Starlight nodded slightly, her face blank and even.

“I suppose that'll do. But understand this, Pie,” said Starlight, pointing threateningly. “This is not your second chance. This is not your shot at glory. This is the story of my victory, and you're going to stay in the footnotes. Where you belong.”

Starlight stormed out of the office before Pinkie could respond. Pinkie shrugged, then resumed chatting with Twilight about the upcoming main event match.

“Welcome all, to Friday Night Ascension!” said Celestia, the blistering energy of the capacity crowd infecting her as it normally did. “The most explosive part of your Friday nights! I am Celestia Regal, joined as always by my broadcasting partner, Discord Redrum.”

“We have a massively stacked card tonight!” said Discord. “First, fresh new talent is hoping to topple the Monster Amongst Men, Tirek Crimson!”

“Then we have the hottest young star in the EWF, Diamond Tiara, versus the spry and scrappy Scootaloo,” added Celestia. “Diamond, of course, one of our most promising young stars in the EWF. A win for Scootaloo could slingshot her into the title conversation.”

“All of that, and more, starting now!”

A sound akin to a cannon firing rang throughout the arena, followed by the deep pounding of a bass drum and the clash of cymbals. Slowly down the ramp stomped a massive mountain of a man, somewhere around seven feet in height. His black tank top could barely contain his sheer mass as he stepped up to the apron and climbed over the top rope.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Tartarus, weighing in at 392 pounds, TIREK CRIMSON!”

He silently raised his fists above his head, waiting for his opponent.

A slick guitar riff floated out, which was immediately followed by a small, green-haired wrestler who ran from backstage as if his life depended on it. Behind him, a man about as tall as Tirek, strolled up next to him, his jeans torn and his t-shirt struggling to contain his toned, muscular chest. They stopped halfway down the ramp, the smaller of the two pulling a microphone from his pocket.

“And his opponent, from—”

“Cut it!” shouted the man with the microphone. “Now, for those of you who haven’t had to pleasure of meeting me, allow me to introduce myself. From the Badlands, weighing in at 199 pounds, I am The Future of the EWF, The Brave, The Glorious SPIKE EMERALD!” He pointed threateningly at Tirek. “And you, my friend, are a dead man walking! If I were you, I’d give up right now, and I’m gonna tell you why. You may be the biggest dude in the locker room, and you may have decimated most opponents who came through, but let me tell you something: I'm not like most opponents! Now, my buddy Big Mac here, he said to me ‘Hey, Spike, you know that this Tirek guy has only ever lost twice?’ Ain't that right, Mac?”

Big Mac leaned in to the mic, uttering a single word.

“Eeyup.”

“And you remember what I said back to you, Mac?”

“Eeyup.”

“You wanna tell the people what it is I said to you, Mac?”

Big Mac leaned forward, staring silently at Tirek. For almost a full minute, the entire arena was silent.

“Nope,” he said. Spike nodded, patting Mac firmly on the back.

“I wouldn't want to say it, either. These good people don't need to hear those gory details. I mean, come on, there are kids watching,” said Spike with a grin. “So I'll give you the PG version: Get ready to add a third loss to your record.”

He dropped his microphone, marching towards the ring with Mac by his side. Spike scaled the apron, staring up at the massive mountain of a man that was just a few feet from him.

Spike dropped down, then walked back up the ramp. He bent down and picked his microphone back up.

“I dropped my mic,” said Spike. “Can't be littering, y’know? This is our only Earth, gotta take care of it.” Spike returned to the apron, passing his microphone to Big Mac. Spike tugged on the ropes before ducking beneath the top rope. He paused halfway through, then pulled out and dropped down to the ground.

Spike slapped his chest, hopping in place to get himself psyched up for the match. He looked up at Tirek again, then dropped down and pumped out a few push-ups. When he was finished, he slowly climbed back to the apron and into the ring.

As soon as the bell rang, Tirek ran forward like a semi-truck. He raised his boot, kicking Spike so hard in the head that the Future of the EWF flipped backwards twice and landed on his stomach. Tirek tossed Spike onto his back, dropped to one knee, and pressed a palm against Spike’s chest.

“And absolutely massive boot from Tirek Crimson!” said Discord.

One! Two! Three!

“The winner, TIREK CRIMSON!”

“And, just like that, this match is over!” said Celestia. “That’s gotta be some sort of record. Do we have an official time on that match?”

“From bell to bell, Spike Emerald lasted exactly… Fourteen seconds,” said Discord, after a cursory check of the time. “All it took was fourteen seconds for the beast that is Tirek Crimson to end a career, almost before it even started.”

Tirek climbed over the top rope, then slowly stomped up the ramp. Big Mac slid into the ring, trying to stir his friend. When it was clear that Spike wouldn’t be getting up anytime soon, Mac hoisted Spike onto his shoulders and carried him out of the ring.

Ember Torch sat in the locker room, her Nationals Championship resting on her shoulder, as she laced up her boots. The title was in inverted pentagon, the front plate decorated with a circle split down the middle; one half was of the sun, the other of the moon. A large set of golden wings spread from either side of the sun/moon, with a spiraling unicorn horn emerging to the top. Ember strapped the title around her waist, grinning sinisterly as she did.

Ember stood up, turning to face none other than one of her opponents in the main event.

“Hiya, Em,” said Pinkie brightly. “Getting ready for tonight?”

“What do you want?” asked Ember, resting her hands defensively on her title.

“Welllll, I was thinking about Monday, and how you messed up my match with Starlight,” said Pinkie. She took a seat on the bench that was formerly occupied by Ember. “And, I realized that I should probably thank you. So thanks.”

“Thank me?”

“Yeah, silly, for trying to get me to win. It’s obvious, really.” Pinkie’s grin never seemed to falter, no matter how annoyed Ember clearly was. “That’s why you hit me first, so Starlight would get DQ’d. And, of course, you beat down Starlight to stop her from coming for payback. You wanted to make sure you fought me, which, I gotta say, means a lot. I’m honored, really, knowing that you wanted to fight lil’ ol’ me.”

“Heh. Is that so?” snickered Ember. “Lil’ ol’ you…”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it, silly! I mean, your plan kinda didn’t work, cause Starlight is ready to go and she’s super-duper peeved, but your heart was in the right place. But… Even though I appreciate you wanting to fight me, you really shouldn’t have gotten in the way. If you would’ve waited just a bit, I would’ve won anyway.” In a surprise to Pinkie, Ember started to laugh. She adjusted her belt, noting Pinkie’s almost hungry gaze.

“Maybe you’re not as stupid as Glimmer makes you out to be. You were half right, anyway,” said Ember. “You’re right, I did want to fight you tonight for the championship. But not because I’ve had this big dream of facing you, or because I thought you’d bring out the best in me, or any stupid crap like that. I wanted to fight you because you’re an easy win. Glimmer might have given me troubles, but you’re a free title retention.”

“And just how do you figure that?” said Pinkie, her smile everpresent. Ember grinned evilly, pointing to her belt.

“You’ll never touch this. You’ll never taste gold. All these years in the EWF, and not a single championship to your name,” said Ember. “That’s pathetic. You’ve never won before, you’ll never win in the future, and you’re damn sure not going to win tonight. So what do you got to say to that?”

Pinkie chuckled, pushing herself to her feet. She patted Ember’s shoulder, her demeanor shifting slightly. Her smile was still there, but there was this new layer of determination and fire. She had slipped into game mode.

“Like I said, I appreciate what you did, even if I didn’t ask for it. So, to thank you for your trouble, let me give you some advice,” said Pinkie. Suddenly, her smile dropped completely, leaving her with a glare of laser-focus. “Next time you attack me and ruin my match, make sure I can’t walk out of that arena that night. You know why?” She tapped the championship, then gestured to her waist. “Because if I step into the ring with someone who ruined my match, I Pinkie Promise you that that someone won’t be stepping out.” And, just as quickly as it vanished, her smile reappeared. “See ya, Em, and good luck. Between me and Starlight… I think you might just need it.”

The angelic hum of a harp floated weightlessly throughout the arena. A woman soon joined it, dressed in light blue ring gear. She carried herself with an air of superiority, rolling into the ring as if the match was beneath her.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Ponyville, weighing in at 186 pounds, LYRA HEARTSTRINGS!”

Lyra leaned against the turnbuckle casually, waiting for her opponent to make herself seen.

A bright, colorful pop song blared loudly, contrasting starkly with Lyra’s classy, harmonic tune. A bright, cheery woman ran out, carefully clutching a bowl filled with candies. She tossed fistfuls of candy into the sections of the crowd that were cheering loudest, chucking sweets all the way down to the ring. She discarded the bowl and hopped up to the apron, raising her fists above her head.

“And her opponent, from Fillydelphia, weighing in at 159 pounds, BON-BON!”

Bon-Bon slipped into the ring, immediately strafing her opponent. With a confident smirk, Bon-Bon pointed to Lyra, then pointed to the mat. Lyra returned the smile, then beckoned for Bon-Bon.

“And we're off,” said Celestia as the bell rang. “What can we expect from these two competitors, Discord?”

“From Lyra, I'm sure we can expect surprising feats of strength and unsurpassed ring smarts,” said Discord. “From Bon-Bon, I imagine we can expect three cavities and a root canal.”

“Ah, who doesn't love candy?”

“People with three cavities and a root canal, for one.”

Lyra rushed forward, ducking under Bon-Bon’s wild swing and wrapped her arms around her waist. Lyra hoisted her opponent up and slammed her down onto her stomach. She rolled around and grabbed her opponent in a front facelock, then harshly brought her knee against Bon-Bon’s head.

“Lyra Heartstrings taking control early on here,” said Celestia. “Heartstrings, former Intercontinental Champion, something of a veteran here, while Bon-Bon can be considered the young blood.”

“Which is why Lyra is at a distinct advantage, I think,” said Discord. “There are things that one only learns from years in the ring. Heartstrings knows how to wrestle on the mat, on the ground, and in the mind.”

Lyra dragged Bon-Bon to her feet, then tossed her into the corner. She ran forward, ramming her shoulder into Bon-Bon’s middle. Lyra grabbed Bon-Bon by the hair, threw her to the ground, and scaled the turnbuckle.

Bon-Bon scurried to her feet, rushing to stop Lyra. She swung her fist into the side of Lyra’s head, stunning her on her perch. Lyra shoved Bon-Bon away with her foot, preparing to leap. Suddenly, Bon-Bon jumped up and wrapped her legs around Lyra’s head, swinging down and dropping them both to the mat.

“Lyra in the high-rent district and made to pay by a beautiful hurricanrana,” called Celestia. “Bon-Bon goes for the cover, one, two, and a kickout at two.”

Lyra stood up, clutching her neck gingerly. She stared down her opponent, trying to find a way to outsmart her. As a plan was forming in her head, Bon-Bon rushed forward and hooked Lyra in the side. She let out a quick barrage of punches before kicking Lyra in the gut, bending her over at the waist, and planting her with a DDT.

“Bon-Bon on the offensive here, and Lyra needs to think of something, anything to turn this match around,” said Discord. “Use some of that veteran know-how.”

Bon-Bon went to continue her offense, but Lyra rolled out of the ring to catch her breath. Lyra held up a finger, clutching her chest tiredly.

One!

Lyra leaned against a nearby barricade, watching Bon-Bon pace anxiously in the ring.

Two!

Three!

Four!

Lyra nodded, then hopped up onto the apron. Bon-Bon backed up to allow Lyra into the ring, then immediately ran forward. Lyra dropped down, rolled out of the ring a second time, strolling around the ring.

“I think someone needs to remind Lyra Heartstrings that she’s supposed to be wrestling,” said Celestia restlessly. “This is supposed to be a match, not a game of tag.”

“And this is why you’d never be successful in this business, Regal,” said Discord. “This is obviously all a part of Lyra’s strategy. There is more to wrestling than hitting your opponent. It’s as much mental as it is physical, and Lyra is dominating the mind games.”

“True as that may be, I find it hard to imagine Bon-Bon being pinned by mind games.”

Bon-Bon stomped her foot, then headed for the ropes. The referee grabbed her before she could leave the ring, urging her to stay in and allow him to finish the count. As the two argued, Lyra saw her opportunity. She jumped to the apron and shoved Bon-Bon as hard as she could, knocking both her and the referee to the ground. Lyra quickly raised the ring skirt and retrieved a steel chair, which she brought with her into the ring.

“The referee down, Lyra Heartstrings planning to use that illegal foreign object in this match,” said Celestia. “Is that strategy, Discord? Is that behavior befitting a two-time Intercontinental Champion?”

“You do whatever you have to do to win, or else you lose. It’s really that simple,” said Discord.

Lyra held the chair at the ready, waiting for the perfect opportunity. By the time Bon-Bon was nearing vertical, the referee had only made it to his hands and knees. Lyra grinned, knowing that she had the match in the bag.

She tossed the chair at Bon-Bon, who caught it easily, then fell flat on her back, feigning unconsciousness.

“What in the world?” said Celestia. “What is she doing…?”

“Winning the match, Regal, isn’t it obvious?” laughed Discord. “Brilliant move by Lyra Heartstrings!”

Bon-Bon looked at the chair, then at Lyra, utterly perplexed. She turned to toss the chair out of the ring, nearly bumping into the referee. The referee’s gaze bounced from Bon-Bon, the chair in her hand, and Lyra’s apparently unconscious body. He pointed to the chair, then called for the bell.

“The winner by disqualification, LYRA HEARTSTRINGS!”

Lyra rolled out of the ring, smiling at the boos from the crowd, as well as Bon-Bon’s angry scowl. She raised her hand above her head in victory as she headed up the ramp and backstage to the locker room.

Twilight Sparkle had finally finished her paperwork, and the show was going well. For the most part. She wasn’t fond of how Lyra had won, but she knew that there wasn’t much she could do about it. Technically speaking, Lyra had done nothing wrong. There was no rule against faking an injury. In the end, though, it didn’t matter. Bon-Bon would get her rematch, and now she knew what to expect.

Twilight decided to utilize this rare break in her schedule to grab some much-needed coffee. She grabbed her cane and slowly limped to her door. As she grabbed the knob, she heard a knock, which probably meant that her coffee would have to wait. She opened the door, then stepped out of the way to let Diamond Tiara into her office.

“Please, take a seat,” said Twilight. “What can I do for you, Diamond?”

“I have a match next, so I’m going to keep this brief,” said Diamond, ignoring the seat entirely. “I am quite possibly the greatest performer you have on your roster.”

“I’m sure that can be argued, yes.”

“My win-loss record is impeccable. In my first year, I’ve beaten the EWF’s best. Any promotion in the world would be clamoring to have me. When my contract expires, I’ll have twelve different offers before I even pick up my pen to resign here.”

“What part of this is brief?” asked Twilight. “What exactly is your point?” Diamond Tiara scowled at the General Manager, but managed to keep the bulk of her anger contained.

“My point is that I’m not champion. Why am I not champion?”

“Well, as you no doubt have heard, Ember, Starlight, and Pinkie are due for a Nationals championship match,” said Twilight. “So you’d have to go to the back of the line. I could pencil you in for the IC title, but Rarity is due her rematch, and then who knows who else could be contenders. I could put you in the tag title picture, but you’d need a partner and—”

“You know what I meant, Sparkle.”

Twilight sighed, her gaze falling to the last picture on her wall. Trixie’s mocking grin did nothing to improve Twilight’s mood.

“Diamond, I want to give you a shot at the World Title. I really, really do,” said Twilight. “I want to give a shot to anyone who deserves it. But, unfortunately, I cannot. This situation of the champion being the General Manager… It’s unprecedented. I can’t book her into a title match. And I understand, it’s frustrating. Trust me, few people know what it feels like to have the title just outside your grasp better than I do.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” scoffed Diamond. “I came to the EWF because I was promised opportunities, a chance to prove that I’m the best in the world! But, because you screwed up, I’m stuck being on the level as all the rest of this mediocre roster!”

“Wait a moment…” said Twilight, an idea forming in her head. “Say that again…”

“The rest of this mediocre roster!”

“No, no, before that…”

“I’m the best in the world?” Now, Diamond was more confused than angry. What was this dusty old bat going on about now?

“No, before that, even.”

“Er… I was promised opportunities?”

Twilight grinned, then quickly hobbled back to her desk. She immediately drew up documents and drafts, a devious glint in her eye.

“Go have your match, Diamond,” said Twilight. “And I promise, I’ll have an opportunity for you by next Friday.”

“You better,” said Diamond. “Because my father is good friends with the owner of Crystal Empire Wrestling, and I can have myself a World Title shot from day one if I wanted to.”

“I don’t think this’ll disappoint you, Diamond. You wanted an opportunity?” Twilight grinned. “I’m about to give you the ultimate opportunity.”

A cold, mechanical electronic track slammed against the eardrums of the capacity crowd. Down the ramp came a small, purple-haired woman in purple tights with black trim. She made her way down to the ring to moderate cheers from the crowd. The crowd liked her well enough. They just didn’t expect her to last very long.

“The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Making her way to the ring, from Cloudsdale, weighing in at 130 pounds, SCOOTALOO!”

Scootaloo raised her hands above her head, grinning with anticipation. She beckoned for her opponent to make her way down the ring.

A classical fanfare blared, like the sort to precede a princess’ arrival. Diamond Tiara stomped down the ramp, wasting no time in getting into the ring. She slid inside and immediately jumped onto Scootaloo, battering her with clubbing blows.

“And before this match can even get underway, Diamond Tiara is in the driver’s seat!” called Discord. “Battering strikes to the head, bringing Scootaloo to the ground!”

Diamond continued beating down her opponent, stomping on her remorselessly. The referee tried and failed to pull her off, struggling to separate the two. Diamond pushed the referee away, then dropped down and rained vicious fists onto Scootaloo’s head. She slammed her head against the mat viciously, not satisfied until Scootaloo remained laying on the ground, nearly motionless.

“What is this?!” demanded Celestia. “This is supposed to be a fair contest, and Diamond Tiara beat down her opponent before the match even began!”

“You can understand why, can’t you?” asked Discord. “Diamond Tiara is a world-class athlete, and she deserves better than this! She deserves the World Title and, when Twilight Sparkle refused to give it to her, she decided to let her frustrations be known!”

“But this is too far! That’s no way to go about getting a chance at such a prestigious title!”

Diamond stomped on Scootaloo’s head one last time before stomping away and rolling out of the ring. She strutted up the ramp, serenaded by boos, but she couldn’t care less. She had made her statement.

“The hell are you going!”

Diamond stopped in her tracks, slowly turning on the spot. To her surprise and mild annoyance, Scootaloo was pushing herself to her feet. She had acquired a microphone, and struggled to stand.

“You think you can just jump me and walk away?” huffed Scootaloo. “Why don’t you come fight me face to face? You scared? You wanna fight, then come fight!” She dropped the mic, beckoning for a real fight. Diamond scowled, then ran back to down the ramp. She slid into the ring and, before she could do so much as take a step, was clubbed repeatedly by Scootaloo.

“To hell with a match!” laughed Discord. “We’ve got a brawl on our hands! No rules, no regulations, just sheer violence! I love it!”

Scootaloo’s burst of offense was short-lived, and Diamond quickly turned the tables. She hoisted up the significantly lighter Scootaloo up and threw her into the corner. She rushed forward, her face met with with Scootaloo’s boot. As Diamond staggered, Scootaloo pushed herself to the top rope. Diamond rushed forward, elbowing Scootaloo and dropping her to a seated position. Diamond jumped to the middle rope, grabbing Scootaloo around the neck, then bounced into the air, twisting and slamming her down to the mat.

“Girl’s Best Friend!” called Discord. “She’s done! Scootaloo’s gotta be finished!”

“She can’t be finished if the match never started!” said Celestia. “This is not a contest of strength or skill. This is an assault!”

“But whose fault is it, really? I mean, she already got her ass kicked, so why would she invite another beatdown?”

Diamond dragged Scootaloo to the center of the ring, yelling at the referee to start the match. The referee stood, confused, until Diamond shouted at him to “ring the goddamned bell”. He reluctantly called for the bell, then stepped out of Diamond’s way.

Diamond stomped on Scootaloo’s unmoving body for a few moments before dropping down for the cover.

One! Two! Three!

Diamond stood up, then left the ring with her fist raised in victory. The boos were thunderous as Diamond ascended the ramp and disappeared backstage.

The sharp, militaristic march theme of the Equalizer drummed through the arena. To the crowd’s great displeasure, Starlight Glimmer stomped down the ramp, sliding into the ring. She was out for blood, by the look in her eye, and she wouldn't be leaving without it.

A peppy polka tune hummed throughout the room, drowned out almost entirely by the crowd’s raucous cheers. Pinkie Pie cartwheeled down the ramp, any of her anger from earlier in the night totally gone. She flipped into the ring, rolling to a stop just a few feet from Starlight. Pinkie offered her hand, and, for the second time, Starlight refused it. Pinkie shrugged, found a corner she liked, and leaned herself against the turnbuckles.

The screech of an electric guitar marked the arrival of the EWF Nationals Champion. Ember raised her title over her head before slipping into the ring. She stared down her opponents, Pinkie in particular, before handing her belt to the referee.

“The following contest is a Triple Threat match, scheduled for one-fall, and it is for the EWF Nationals Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, from Our Town, weighing in at 152 pounds, The Equalizer, STARLIGHT GLIMMER!”

Starlight rotated her shoulder, her eyes bouncing between her opponents. She had her work cut out for her.

“And her opponent, from Rockville, weighing in at 266 pounds, The Outrageous, PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!”

Pinkie pulled herself up from her corner, raising her fists to the sky. Her trademark grin was ever-present, despite her fierce competition.

“And, finally, from The Badlands, weighing in at 132 pounds, she is the current EWF Nationals Champion, The Dragon Lord, EMBER TORCH!”

Ember pointed to each of her opponents, then to the mat, then finally pantomiming a belt around her waist. The three women stared each other down, waiting for the match to begin. The referee showed each competitor the belt, raised it high to the crowd, and then handed the belt to the timekeeper. He called for the match to begin, setting off the main event of Friday Night Ascension.

The bell rang, and Ember immediately rolled out of the ring.

“Smart move by Ember Torch, removing herself from the equation,” said Discord. “No point in tiring herself out now.”

“For those unfamiliar with Triple Threat rules, it's simple,” said Celestia. “No countout, no disqualification, the first competitor to pin or submit either of their opponents walks away with the gold. The champion, Ember Torch, does not have to involved in the end of this match to lose her championship.”

“Which I'm sure just rubs you the wrong way, Regal. No DQ? How will we possibly keep order?!”

“I actually don't mind in these sort of matches, because it removes Champion’s Advantage,” explained Celestia, ignoring her colleague’s mocking. “This match is going to end with a pin or a submission, no ways about it. But, back to the action, Pinkie and Glimmer in a stiff lock-up, Pinkie trying not to fall victim to the same tactics as Monday.”

Pinkie overpowered Starlight, throwing her to the ground. She backed up and ran forward, jumping into the air and falling back onto Starlight’s chest.

“And a rib-shattering senton from the Outrageous Pinkamena Pie,” called Discord. “Over 250 pounds directly onto Glimmer’s chest.”

Pinkie dropped to a full mount and rained heavy strikes down into Starlight’s head, eventually dragging her up and tossing her to the ropes. Starlight slid out of the ring before she could rebound, stopping just a few feet from Ember. The two stared each other down, Glimmer pointing to the ring. Ember refused, gesturing for Glimmer to get back into the ring herself.

“And it appears we've got a disagreement at ringside,” noted Celestia. “The champion and the challenger both want the other to face Pinkie, making it clear that neither wants to be in the ring with her.”

Pinkie didn't mind that nobody wanted to share the ring with her; she was headed out anyway. She bounced off the ropes and ran, throwing herself out of the ring and into her opponents. Pinkie barreled through them both, toppling all three competitors to the ground. Pinkie emerged the sole survivor of the encounter, hopping to her feet to a thunderous applause. Pinkie tossed Ember into the ring, and followed suite.

“Suicide dive from Pie!” called Discord. “No one that large should be able to move so nimbly! She drops for the cover, and a kick out at one!”

Ember scurried to her feet, just to be knocked down by a stiff forearm bash. Ember hurried up, then was knocked down by another heavy smash. When she returned to her feet for the third time, she made a poor attempt at offense; Pinkie blocked her punch, then smashed her head against Ember’s.

Starlight rushed into the ring, gunning for Pinkie. Pinkie blocked her punch as well, grabbing Starlight around the back of the neck with her left hand, then Ember in the same way with her right. She smashed their heads together, holding them close, then grinned.

“And the Stun Gun Headbutts!” called Celestia as Pinkie bashed her head against her opponents’ skulls again and again. “You can almost hear the brains bouncing around skulls!”

Pinkie smashed her forehead against her opponents’ skulls one last time, dropping them both to the ground. She pushed Starlight onto her back and went for the pin.

One! Two!

Starlight just barely brought her shoulder up in time, clearly still rattled from the rapid, repeated introductions of her head to Pinkie’s. When the pin was broken, Pinkie simply rolled over and tried Ember.

One! Two!

Another kick out, just as close as the last. Pinkie stood up, hands on her hips. She smirked confidently, then pointed to Ember. The crowd cheered moderately, which made Pinkie smile and shrug. She pointed to Starlight, and the cheers were even louder. Pinkie danced in place, pointing to each of her opponents.

“Eeny-meeny-miney…” Pinkie ran and dropped a heavy senton onto Ember. She leapt up and dropped onto Starlight. She looped around, dropping all 266 pounds of herself onto her opponents four times each. She pinned Starlight, resulting in another near-fall. Pinkie slapped the mat, then leapt to her feet. She turned around and was immediately leapt on by Ember, who twisted around and bent Pinkie back in an inverted facelock. She hooked Pinkie’s arm and stretched her over her knee.

“And Ember Torch with the sneaky Bloodstone Dragon Sleeper!” called Discord. “She’s cutting off all of the oxygen to Pie’s head, which is a problem I’m sure she had to begin with.”

“Reminder, if Pinkie Pie cannot continue, Ember Torch will retain her championship with a knockout victory,” added Celestia. “Pinkie doesn’t have long in that hold before her light goes out.”

Pinkie struggled in the hold, fighting to stay conscious. Slowly, as the energy left her body, she went limp. Ember shouted at the referee to check her, and he grabbed Pinkie by the wrist, raising it above her head. He released her hand, which fell limp to the side. The referee raised it again, and again it fell limp.The referee grabbed Pinkie’s arm one final time, dropping it down. Before her arm hit the mat, Pinkie raised it to the sky, eliciting a cheer from the crowd.

Pinkie jerked and twisted, pushing herself to a more upright position. Ember clubbed Pinkie in the chest, trying to force her back down into the hold. Pinkie’s will was too strong; She fought and struggled, breaking free with a firm strike to the head. As soon as she was free, Pinkie gave Ember a firm boot to the gut. She bent her over at the waist and slipped Ember’s head between her legs. She punched the sky, then grabbed Ember around the middle and jumped forward, flipping them both through the air and driving Ember’s head into the mat.

“And Pinkie with an Equestrian Destroyer!” called Celestia. “It must be over! Ember Torch is definitely, without a doubt, finished!”

Before Pinkie could go for the pin, she felt something grab her by the hair. Starlight yanked her up, spun her around, and kicked her hard in the middle. She bent Pinkie at the waist, slipped an arm over her back and grabbed it her own hand from beneath Pinkie’s middle. She hoisted Pinkie vertically, then dropped straight down, slamming Pinkie directly onto her head. Starlight let Pinkie slump, then hooked her leg for the pin.

“Neutralizer! Starlight shocks Pinkie with a sudden Neutralizer!” said Celestia.

One! Two! Three!

Starlight Glimmer raised her fists above her head, a satisfied, superior grin on her face. She sat on the mat, bathing in the boos from the crowd. The referee presented her with the championship, which she greedily snatched and rested on her shoulder.

“The winner, and the new EWF Nationals Champion, The Equalizer, STARLIGHT GLIMMER!”

“We’ve got ourselves a new champion!” cheered Discord, clapping at the display. “A spectacular main event, no matter how you feel about the result.”

“Ember Torch and Pinkie Pie cannot be happy with this result,” said Celestia. “We’ll have to see the fallout next time on Monday Night Magic.”

“Until next time, EWF Universe, this has been Discord Redrum and Celestia Regal,” said Discord. “As always, we’ll be seeing you on Monday. Good night!”

Monday Night Magic II

Starlight Glimmer strolled through the backstage area, her new championship resting comfortably on her shoulder. She was very pleased with herself, having stolen a win from right under that embarrassment’s nose. That should teach Pinkamena Pie a lesson she'd scarcely forget.

Starlight grabbed the door to the locker room, pausing when she saw the General Manager approach from the right.

“Congratulations, Starlight Glimmer,” said Trixie. “If there's anyone in my company that deserves that championship, it's you.”

“Thank you. To be perfectly honest, the championship is almost inconsequential, if for nothing else than to pin Pinkamena Pie in the middle of the ring,” said Starlight. “But, by that same token… the gold is an added bonus.”

“Speaking of bonuses… I wanted to talk to you about something. An idea that came to mind after seeing you take that championship.”

“Hm?”

“Well… You have a rematch with Ember Torch this Friday on Ascension,” said Trixie. “And… Well, how about we continue this conversation inside?”

Starlight nodded, then disappeared into the locker room. Trixie followed behind her with a devious, dastardly grin.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Magic!” said Celestia. “The most enchanting part of your Monday night! I am Celestia Regal, joined as always by my colleague, Discord Redrum.”

“And what we have for you tonight is nothing less than the greatest displays of professional wrestling in the world!” exclaimed Discord. “First, a meeting of the two most ridiculous women in this company, Sonata Dusk and Pinkamena Pie!”

O! M! G!

A bright, bubbly pop theme marked the arrival of the first competitor. Sonata Dusk danced down the ramp to the sounds of unanimous cheers. Sonata all but skipped her way up the steel stairs and into the ring, waiting for her opponent.

“Introducing first, from the Black Sea, weighing in at 135 pounds, SONATA DUSK!”

The funky sounds of Pinkie’s accordion gave way to The Outrageous Pie herself. She bounced halfway down the ramp, cartwheeling the rest of the way and flipping into the ring. Pinkie extended her hand, offering it to Sonata. She looked at it for a moment before batting Pinkie’s hand away and jumping in to hug her opponent. Pinkie smiled, returning the embrace, then broke apart to prepare for the match.

“And after that beautiful display of sportsmanship, we are off!” said Celestia as the bell rang. “These two have the potential for a very exciting match, don't you agree?”

“I may not care much for either of these competitors, but I know that when you take two freaks and put them together, something interesting is bound to happen,” said Discord. “Quick collar-elbow tie up here, and I want to mention that Sonata’s partners, Aria Blaze and Adagio Dazzle, are nowhere to be found. No doubt preparing for their imminent tag team championship defense later in the night.”

Sonata slipped under Pinkie’s arm, kicking her firmly in the back of the knee. Pinkie buckled, and could do nothing to defend herself from the swift flurry of kicks to the side. Pinkie pushed her away and returned to her full height, gingerly rubbing her side. She grinned with determination, hopping in place to get into a groove.

Pinkie ran forward, easily hoisting Sonata up and bringing her down to the mat. She grabbed Sonata’s legs and flipped forward, bridging over Sonata and pinning her shoulders to the mat.

One! Two!

Sonata kicked out from the sneaky pin attempt, rolling to her feet. She kicked Pinkie firmly in the leg, barely causing her to flinch. Another kick to the thigh, this time with slightly more visible results. Pinkie slapped her thigh, urging Sonata to do better.

Sonata suddenly leapt into the air, driving both feet directly into Pinkie’s face. They both scurried to their feet, and Sonata connected with another head-rattling dropkick.

“Sonata Dusk building up a head of steam here,” said Celestia. “It's good to see that she can handle singles competition, despite predominantly being a tag-team combatant.”

“I've been trying to tell you, Regal, the Dazzlings are some of the most elite competitors in this promotion or any other,” said Discord. “Even the worst of them are better than average.”

Sonata dropkicked Pinkie a third time, laying her flat on her back. She bounced off of the ropes, cartwheeling and dropping a sharp elbow onto Pinkie’s chest.

“Cartwheel elbow from Sonata Dusk,” called Celestia. “Lateral press…”

One! Two!

Pinkie brought her shoulder up with little time to spare. Sonata dragged Pinkie’s body closer to the corner, then climbed the turnbuckle. With her back to Pinkie, she leaped off and flipped backwards.

Pinkie suddenly jumped up, snatching Sonata right out of the sky. She carried the much lighter acrobat to to the center of the ring and slammed her firmly onto her back.

“The power on display!” said Celestia. “Incredible! Pinkie for the pin! One, two, and a kickout at two.” Sonata zipped from beneath Pinkie, shoving her down to the ground. She grabbed Pinkie’s foot, planted her own knee in the small of Pinkie’s back, and wrenched the whole leg.

“What's this?! An ankle lock?!” demanded Discord. “I've never in my life seen Sonata Dusk lock in a submission, let alone such an expert ankle lock! Pie’s in the middle of the ring, nowhere to go!”

Pinkie slammed her fist against the ground, her leg in blistering agony. She clawed her way forward, inching closer and closer to the ropes.

Sonata loosened her hold and dragged Pinkie back to the middle of the ring. She wrapped her legs around Pinkie’s, then reached forward and grabbed her opponent in a facelock.

“Sonata Dusk is just full of surprises!” cheered Celestia. “Taking a page out of Aria’s playbook, Sonata flawlessly transitioning from an ankle lock to a perfect stepover toehold facelock!”

“Let me tell you something, Regal, that hold is not a fun time,” said Discord. “Dusk might be a scrawny little thing, but to be able to stretch Pie’s legs, her neck, her back! Pie's in an insane amount of pain right now, and she doesn't have long in that STF before there are permanent effects on the body.”

Pinkie howled in pain, her hand hovering over the mat. She wasn't far from tapping out, it seemed, and Sonata wasn't letting go anytime soon. Pinkie pushed the pain to the back of her mind, focusing on how she'd get out of the submission.

Pinkie punched the mat, slowly pushing herself up. Sonata held on tightly, even as Pinkie fully regained her vertical base. Sonata adjusted quickly, wrapping an arm around Pinkie’s throat and clutching her head in a sleeper.

“Sonata trying to cut off the oxygen going to Pinkie’s brain,” said Celestia as Sonata wrapped her legs around Pinkie’s middle in order to stabilize herself. “We’ve seen matches end by this very hold, just sapping the life from a competitor.”

Pinkie reached back and threw Sonata over her head, hoping to fling the much smaller girl away. Sonata held on, wrapping her arm underneath Pinkie’s jaw. She ran forward and jumped, bouncing her legs off the ropes with the intent of flipping over Pinkie and driving her head to the mat.

Pinkie, using her impressive strength, caught Sonata and held her straight up. Pinkie flipped Sonata so that her back was to her stomach, then lowered her down, bent at the waist and with her head between Pinkie’s legs.

“And an Equestrian Destroyer!” cheered Celestia as Pinkie drove Sonata’s head into the ground with a thunderous boom. “Sonata tried to hit that modified shiranui, the Taco Tuesday, but Pinkamena Pie stunningly reverses! And the pin!”

One! Two! Three!

Pinkie leapt to her feet, raising her fists above her head in victory. She scaled the corner, cheering with the crowd. Sonata slowly worked her way up, clutching her head in pain. She met Pinkie in the middle, hugged her, then raised the victor’s hand.

“What a display,” said Celestia. “Doesn't it just warm your heart?”

“It makes me want to throw up, just a little,” said Discord. “This isn't the place for warmth and affection, this is a place for violence and destruction, two things the next competitor is very familiar with. Tirek Crimson is up next, and my only question is who the hell they tricked into fighting this beast!”

“We'll be finding out soon, only on Monday Night Magic!”

Sonata tiredly strolled through to the backstage area. Though she had lost the match and was thoroughly exhausted, she was happy to have the opportunity to compete with an athlete like Pinkie.

She opened the door to the locker room, walking in and taking a seat next to her partners, who were glaring at her angrily.

“What?” she asked.

“You seriously fought tonight?!” demanded Adagio. “And, to make matters worse, you lost!”

“Sorry. She's really good. Besides, I don't have anything to do tonight.”

“Are you brain dead?!” snapped Aria. “Me and Adagio have a tag match tonight!”

“Uh… I know?”

“You're not supposed to burn yourself out! You need to be there to help us win!”

“But… it's a two on two. If I helped you, that'd be cheating,” said Sonata.

“Sonata, we've been over this,” groaned Adagio. “The Dazzlings are champions under the Fire Phoenix Rule. That means that all of us are champions together. And it's not cheating for a champion to be involved in their own title defense!”

“I don't know if that's how it works, Dagi,” said Sonata. “But it shouldn't matter if I'm there or not, right? You two are the best partners anyone could ever have!” She wrapped and arm around each of her partners. “Adagio, you're the greatest striker in the business! Stronger than anyone! You could throw Sunset around like it's nothing! And Ari, even though you kicked me by mistake, you're still the best technician around! I learned everything I know about submissions from you. Did you see my STF earlier?”

“It was sloppy. If it were mine, Pie would've tapped,” grumbled Aria. She glanced at Sonata and smirked in spite of herself. “But I guess I've seen worse. And I guess you're right. I am the best damn technician in the company.”

“See? What did I tell you?” said Sonata, grinning widely. “Just look at this team! We're gonna do great!”

Sonata held up both of her arms, smiling at both of her partners. After just a bit of consideration, Aria and Adagio bumped forearms with their fellow Dazzling.

“Alright, Aria,” said Adagio. “Game time.”

Discord stood in the ring with a microphone, standing beside a small, scrawny competitor in grey tights. He bounced nervously, his eyes trained on the ramp.

“Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Discord Redrum,” said Discord. “And I am standing besides a fellow who wants to attempt to topple the Monster Amongst Men, Tirek Crimson! Tell me, son, what is your name?”

“Diesel Delta,” said the competitor.

“And tell me, Diesel, what makes you think you'll be the one to slay the beast that is Tirek Crimson?”

“I've got heart. I don't stop fighting until I've won.”

“And how do you expect heart to help you against this beast? Seven feet, nearly four hundred pounds of sheer destructive mass!”

“W-wait… he's how big, exactly?”

A cannon fired, preceding the sound of drums and one of the most dominating figures in the EWF. Tirek stomped slowly down the ramp, pulling himself up and stepping over the top rope. Discord immediately rolled out of the ring, replaced by a referee.

The bell rang, and Tirek came barreling out like a semi-truck. He raised his boot, smashing his massive foot against Delta's nose and sending him across the ring. Tirek lifted his opponent’s limp, unmoving body and rested him on his shoulder. He raised his fists and gave a mighty roar before slamming Diesel Delta’s back thunderously to the mat. Tirek dropped to one knee, placing a single finger on Delta's chest.

One! Two! Three!

“And the winner, TIREK CRIMSON!”

“Damn it!” groaned Discord, returning to his place at the commentator’s table. “The match was over before I got back!”

“Yes, Tirek made short work of that competitor,” agreed Celestia. “Someone check on that young man, he might be… Oh no, what's this?!”

Tirek grabbed Diesel by the hair, dragging him like a child with a toy. He pulled Delta to his feet, then smashed his giant fist against the top of his head. Tirek stomped on Delta's unmoving body mercilessly, kicking him out of the ring.

“This is just unnecessary,” said Celestia. “The match was over! What does this prove?”

Tirek let out a massive, beastly roar, then climbed over the ropes and stomped up the ramp.

Diamond Tiara paced in the locker room, her phone to her ear. She had had it up to here with Twilight Sparkle, and she was determined to do something about it.

“Hi, Daddy,” said Diamond in her best, most sugary, manipulative little voice. “I needed to talk to you. It's about my position with the EWF. Mh-hm. I know! I should've been champion ages ago!”

Diamond rolled her eyes, a bit annoyed at how easy her father was to get wrapped around her finger.

“Sparkle refuses to give me the opportunity that I clearly deserve! And I told her, if I'm not happy here, there are plenty of places that would be more than happy to give the hottest young star in wrestling the opportunities she needs. So, I wanted to ask you if you could talk to your people at Crystal Empire Wrestling, maybe ECWF, and—”

Diamond dropped her phone, but was unable to defend herself from the hooded figure who rushed into the room and introduced a steel baseball bat into Diamond’s middle. The hooded figure smashed the bet against Diamond’s ribs twice more before clonking her over the head and dropping her to the ground. The assailant battered Diamond, stomping on her middle remorselessly. When Diamond stopped moving, the assailant dropped her bat and pulled back her hood.

“You just made an enemy, Tiara,” said Scootaloo. “Next time, try and beat me fair and square.”

She kicked Diamond one last time before turning and stepping out of the locker room.

“Tensions are growing here in the EWF,” said Discord. “Scootaloo, the nerve of her, attacking the hottest young competitor in the EWF!”

“While I don't personally agree with violence begetting violence, I can most certainly understand what drove Scootaloo to this,” said Celestia. “After that heinous assault on Ascension last Friday, Scootaloo was out for blood, and she decided to get it when she could.”

“Diamond was on the phone with her father, for God's sake! The nerve of that little runt, attacking a professional wrestling princess while she had no way to defend herself!”

Yee-haw!

The hard rock of the challengers’ theme cut through the air. As soon as the two stepped out onto the ramp, the crowd exploded into cheers. Applejack and Sunset jogged down the ramp, interacting with the crowd despite the intense focus on each of their faces.

“The following contest is a tag team match, scheduled for one-fall, and it is for the EWF Tag-team Championships! Introducing first, the challengers, at a combined weight of 355 pounds, AJ AND SUNSET SHIMMER!”

The two rolled into the ring, pointing to their waists to show where the belts would be resting by the end of the match.

Now, you’re under our spell…

Oh-whoa-oh, oh-whoa-oh

Sonata bounced out, to the cheers of all. She waved to the crowd, then gestured to the back to signal the arrival of her fellow Dazzlings. Aria and Adagio twirled around Sonata, bumping forearms before strolling to the ring with the boos ringing in their ears.

“And their opponents, from the Black Sea, they are the EWF Tag-team Champions, THE DAZZLINGS!”

Aria and Adagio climbed into the ring, while Sonata stayed at ringside. The Dazzlings stared down their opponent, never breaking eye contact while giving the belts to the referee. He showed the belts to the challengers, then the champions, then finally the crowd. He passed the belts to the timekeeper, and called for the bell.

“And we're off, tag team championships on the line in this match,” said Celestia. “Starting us off here, Aria Blaze and The Demon herself, Sunset Shimmer. Shimmer just coming back from an injured shoulder, as you can tell by the black tape on her shoulder. That’s to stimulate blood flow and help ease the pain.”

Aria and Sunset strafed one another, looking for an opening. Sunset crouched slightly, reaching testingly for Aria’s legs.

“Smart move from Sunset here,” said Celestia. “Keep that center of gravity low, it becomes harder for Aria to take her down to the ground, which is good news for the team of AJ and Sunset.”

Aria rushed forward, sliding to the ground and grabbing Sunset’s leg in an attempt to take her down. Sunset stood her ground, and Aria returned to her feet in time to catch a series of quick rights to the head. With her opponent stunned, Sunset grabbed Aria’s legs and threw them up, slamming her onto her back. Sunset leapt forward, pushing Aria’s legs up with her shoulders and pressing Aria’s back against the mat.

One! Two!

Aria kicked out of the quick pin, then found her opportunity. She brought a knee up to Sunset’s face, then grabbed her injured arm, wrapped her legs around it, and dropped to the mat.

“Aria Blaze, quick on her feet as usual,” said Discord. “Fantastic transition into armbar! And she has it locked in on that injured arm, no less. It’s only a matter of time before Sunset taps!”

Sunset howled in pain, feeling as if her shoulder was injured all over again. She wiggled and squirmed, fighting to get out of the hold. She pushed herself up and leaned over, pressing Aria’s shoulders down while keeping her own shoulder elevated.

One! Two!

Aria easily kicked out, but, in doing so, had no choice but to break the hold. They both scurried to their feet, though Aria a bit quicker. She nearly took Sunset’s head off with a quick lariat, dropping her to the mat. Sunset quickly recovered, only to be taken down again, then again. Aria turned to the crowd and raised her arms triumphantly, clearly annoyed when all she received were boos.

While Aria was distracted, Sunset quickly crawled to her corner and tagged in her partner. AJ slowly stepped into the ring, smiling as the boos from the crowd morphed into “Hell Yeah” chants.

Aria had enough of the crowd, and ran back to finish off Sunset. She collided with Applejack, who barely moved as Aria nearly tumbled to the ground. Applejack grinned, then grabbed Aria around the back of the neck and chucked her clean across the ring.

“Would you look at that strength!” called Celestia in awe. “She tossed Aria like a toy! She’s making it very clear whose ring it is tonight.”

Aria sat up, staring at the massive woman before her. She crawled backwards, slapped Adagio on the thigh, and quickly rolled out of the ring. Adagio glared at her partner, then stepped into the ring.

Applejack barreled forward, running Adagio down with a simple shoulder block. Adagio leapt to her feet, then was grabbed and tossed into the corner. AJ ran forward and jumped into Adagio, crushing her against the turnbuckle.

“Big stinger splash from AJ,” said Discord. AJ lifted her opponent onto her shoulder then ran, slamming her down onto her back. She pressed Adagio down for the pin.

One! Two!

Adagio powered out of the pin, though with very little time to spare. AJ stood up and grabbed Adagio by the hair, pulling her to her feet. Adagio quickly thrust an elbow into AJ’s gut, staggering her. She elbowed her again, and again, and one last time before breaking free. She grabbed AJ’s head with her left hand then, with her right, swung up and smashed her forearm against AJ’s chin.

“Adagio, back in the fight with a stiff European uppercut,” said Discord. “She calls herself the best striker in the EWF, and judging by how she’s turned around a match with a few choice blows, I’ve gotta agree with her.”

Adagio connected with another European uppercut, sending Applejack stumbling back. Adagio grabbed AJ by the wrist, attempting to throw her into the ropes. Applejack stood her ground, reversing the Irish whip and sending Adagio into the ropes. She rebounded and jumped high into the air, twisting and thrusting her hips back. She connected, driving her pelvis across the bridge of Applejack’s nose.

“AJ down after the Vivacissimo!” said Celestia. “And the cover!”

One! Two!

Applejack brought her shoulder up, massaging her nose gingerly. Before she could recover, Adagio grabbed her leg and dragged her into the Dazzling corner. Adagio tagged Aria, who stepped into the ring to stomp firmly on AJ’s nose. She dragged the larger woman to the center of the ring, wrapped her legs around AJ’s arm, then grabbed her face and stretched.

“Aria, with a flawless crossface!” said Discord. “The Siren Submission Specialist is trying to claim another victim here, and I think AJ might just tap!”

Applejack struggled in the hold, clawing at Aria’s fingers to break the submission. Aria’s grip was too strong, and Applejack quickly decided that she'd need to find another option.

AJ pushed herself to her knees, disrupting the hold slightly, but not enough to break. She slowly stood up, Aria still clinging to her arm and neck. Once AJ was at a full vertical base, she fell back, driving both her and Aria against the mat.

“And Applejack powers out with a Samoan drop,” said Celestia. “This could be the opening AJ needs!”

Applejack crawled to her corner, reaching for Sunset’s waiting hand. Aria leapt onto AJ and pulled her back to her corner. She tagged in Adagio, who slid into the ring and dropped a knee onto the back of Applejack’s neck. She flipped Applejack onto her back, positioning her near the corner.

Adagio jumped to the top turnbuckle, bouncing off and flipping backwards onto AJ’s chest. She hooked Applejack’s leg for the pin.

One! Two!

Applejack kicked out, which very much annoyed Adagio. She kicked Applejack firmly in the side, smashing her foot against her ribs. She pulled Applejack to her knees, then ran for the ropes. She rebounded and jumped for another Vivacissimo, hoping that it'd be enough to finish her off once and for all.

Applejack ducked under it, which caused Adagio to firmly hit the ground. As she recovered, Applejack crawled forward and lunged for her eager partner, tagging The Demon into the match.

Sunset rushed into the ring, tackling Adagio to the ground and raining down fierce strikes on her head. She hopped up and slapped her own shoulder, screaming “Hell yeah” at the top of her lungs. The crowd joined in, developing a solid rhythm of chants. Sunset slapped her shoulder to the beat, waiting for Adagio to aimlessly stumble into her hands.

Adagio slowly pushed herself up to her knees, clutching her head gingerly. This was just what Sunset was looking for; She ran to the ropes, rebounded, and dove down, driving her shoulder into Adagio’s jaw.

“Sunset takes The Low Road, the move that injured her shoulder to start with,” said Discord. “I wonder how wise that was of her here, with so much on the line!”

“Sunset Shimmer is the sort of competitor to bet it all, to be willing to give their bodies to win,” said Celestia. “An admirable trait, without question. Sunset, going to the high-rent district, and it looks as if she might be trying to finish this!”

Sunset balanced on the top rope, looking down on her opponent. She took in a deep breath, then turned to face away from her opponent. She jumped backward, twisting horizontally and flipping vertically, dropping directly onto Adagio’s chest.

“Phoenix Splash!” called Celestia. “And the pin!”

One!

Sonata ran around the ring as Sunset hooked Adagio’s leg. As the referee started the count, Sonata pulled Adagio’s other leg on top of the rope.

Two!

“Rope! Rope!” shouted Sonata, pointing frantically. The referee looked up, stopping his count just before three when he saw Adagio’s leg. Sunset looked over to Sonata, walking over to her side of the ring.

“What the hell, Sonata!” she shouted.

“Sorry, Shimmy,” said Sonata. “Gotta look out for my team.”

“You're supposed to be better than—” Sunset felt a hand grab her tights and drag her to the ground, pressing her shoulders to the mat. Adagio rolled up Sunset, tugging on a fistful of tights for extra leverage.

One! Two! Three!

Adagio quickly rolled out of the ring, running to the timekeeper and snatching her titles. She held both belts over her head, a devious grin spreading across her face.

“The winners, and still EWF Tag-team Champions, THE DAZZLINGS!”

“Adagio Dazzle, again, cheating to win!” complained Celestia. “Sunset Shimmer had The Dazzlings dead to rights! She was going to win!”

“But she didn’t, because Adagio Dazzle is too smart to be defeated by competition like this,” laughed Discord. “And that is why her team will be holding onto those championships for the foreseeable future!”

“Not if AJ and Sunset have anything to say about it,” said Celestia. “You can bet that they’ll be gunning for a rematch at the next available opportunity. Perhaps that opportunity would be the one that Ascension General Manager Twilight Sparkle was talking about. We’ll have to wait until Friday for that.”

“Until next time, EWF Universe, this has been Discord Redrum and Celestia Regal, wishing you a good night!”

Friday Night Ascension II

A classic rock theme reverberated through the arena, eliciting a unanimous eruption of cheers from the crowd. Nearly everyone in the arena stood, many bowing in respect as the great Twilight Sparkle hobbled out into the arena, clutching her cane in her right hand and a golden briefcase in her left. She smiled, bowing her head slightly to her fans. She slowly ascended into the ring, setting her cane down and rolling in after it. She limped to the center of the ring, set down her briefcase, and borrowed a microphone from the announcer.

“Ladies and gentleman,” she said with a grin. “My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I am your EWF Friday Night Ascension General Manager.”

The crowd exploded into cheers, which made Twilight smile despite her best efforts.

“Glad to know you remember me. In any case, I came here to talk to you tonight about some things that have been weighing heavily on my mind.” Immediately, it became clear that Twilight hadn’t lost her touch with age. She was still one of the best on the mic, able to capture the audience almost immediately. “And, in order to understand my situation, you need a bit of a history lesson.

“Once upon a time, many, many years ago… I was just debuting in the EWF with my best friend, my tag team partner, Trixie Lulamoon.” The crowd booed, the heat for Trixie nearing nuclear status. “And things were great. Our team, Might & Magic, we were nearly unstoppable. Six-time tag team champions, the longest collective time with the belts in EWF history. We were on top of the world. Then… Trixie stabbed me in the back. You see, she wanted to contend for the EWF World Championship, which is an understandable feeling. I sympathized with that feeling even then. But, what she could never live with was the fact that I got it first.”

The crowd erupted into another bout of cheers, many of them old enough to remember the fateful moment when Twilight had forced her former tag partner to tap out in the middle of the ring to capture the then-vacant EWF World Championship. It was an incredible part of wrestling history: the first title win of one of the greatest professional wrestlers in the world.

“I can only speculate that Trixie was jealous of me, because she wouldn’t rest until she took the belt from me. And, to her credit, she did,” continued Twilight. “And I took it back.” The crowd cheered, which made Twilight smile a bit wider. “And we went back and forth, neither of us quite getting a foothold over the other. We battered each other, risking our bodies to prove who was truly the better wrestler. And, there came a time when we couldn’t continue. My leg, my back, Trixie’s neck… We had two options. Either we retire with the score tied, 50-50, neither of us better than the other, or… We could put it all on the line one final time. One last match. At this point, the championship was almost inconsequential. It was about the glory of beating your rival, once and for all. And… I’m not at all ashamed to say that Trixie proved herself to be the better woman that day. Now, the methods of her winning are the subject of… controversy, let’s say, but history remembers only the victor. And remember her, history has. She became general manager of Magic, me of Ascension, and she decided that she would be the last ever EWF World Champion.”

The crowd booed thunderously, starting a chant of “Trixie sucks!”. Twilight shook her head, disappointed in her former partner’s business tactics.

“So that brings us here. For years, I’ve been regrettably denying many talented stars the opportunity to reach the top of the mountain. There was nothing I could do. I can’t book a match for Trixie’s title on my show, because she’s not here. I can’t book a match on Magic, because it’s outside of my jurisdiction. I can’t vacate the title on the 30-day defense rule, because Trixie is actually perfectly capable of defending the title. She simply chooses not to. I can’t force her to Ascension, just as I can’t force myself to Magic. But…” Twilight grabbed the briefcase and raised it up for the crowd to see. “What I can do is give five lucky competitors an opportunity. I have in my hand the Ultimate Opportunity, a briefcase containing a very special contract. The contract is simple: whoever holds the briefcase can challenge for any singles championship, any time, any place, within the next year.”

Twilight grinned as the crowd put things together, then erupted into cheers. As the applause died down, she brought the mic back to her mouth and continued.

“Now what that means is the winner gets a free title match. You can use it on any singles belt you want. Now, I can’t tell you what to do with this briefcase, should you win it, but… If, say, Pinkamena wins, she can cash it in on Luna Regal for the Intercontinental championship at any point in the year. Or, if, say, Ember Torch wins, she can choose to cash it in on Starlight Glimmer for the Nationals championship at any point in time, even immediately after a match, which could give her a second chance should she lose. Or… If the winner wanted to, perhaps, cash the briefcase in on Trixie Lulamoon…”

The crowd burst with excitement, clamoring for this Ultimate Opportunity match to begin. The vast majority of fans had grown quite tired of seeing Trixie as champion, even those who would call themselves supporters of the Magic GM. This was a golden opportunity for things to finally change, for a younger, more deserving star to finally get their chance in the spotlight.

“And, to be truthful, I originally intended to hold this match in a few weeks, at the DisHarmony pay-per-view. But… seeing as I have the contract right now…” Twilight grinned. “Why not just get it over with? So, the main event of tonight’s show will be a five-man ladder match for the Ultimate Opportunity!”

The crowd’s cheers were interrupted by the classical fanfare of Diamond Tiara’s entrance. The cheers immediately became boos as the self-proclaimed “hottest young star in the wrestling” came walking down the ramp.

“Hold the phone, Sparkle,” said Diamond, holding a mic to her mouth. “I read over the list of competitors in this match.” She produced the list from her boot, a simple sheet of paper which she unfolded. “I see Ember Torch, Pinkamena Pie, and two nobodies I’ve never even heard of, but you know who I don’t see? I don’t see The Crown Jewel of the EWF. I don’t see my name on the list!” The crowd cheered at that, which only added to Diamond’s frustrations. “It seems your memory is going with your age, because you clearly forgot that this opportunity was promised to me. Not Pie, not Torch, and definitely not two rookies You promised me that opportunity.”

“And I haven’t broken my promise. See, I promised that I’d be giving you an opportunity,” said Twilight, a mischievous grin spread across her face. “And I never go back on my promises. So, the opportunity I’m presenting you tonight, Diamond Tiara, is the opportunity to insert yourself into the match.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” demanded Diamond.

“Well, I’m not very fond of your brutal assault on Scootaloo last week,” said Twilight. “That said, I wish Scootaloo would’ve handled the situation a bit better. No need for hate to fester more hate. So, we’re going to settle things the way I would’ve when I was your age. You two are going to have a match to decide who gets the last slot in the Ultimate Opportunity match. And that match goes on… right now!”

Twilight handed the microphone to the announcer, then slid out of the ring. To everyone’s surprise, she made no attempt to return up the ramp. Instead, she pulled a chair up next to Discord and grabbed a spare headset, squeezing into the commentator’s area.

“Hi, guys,” said Twilight, tapping the mouthpiece. “Am I on?”

“Er… Certainly, but, er… This is abnormal,” said Celestia. “General managers don’t typically do commentary on their shows.”

“Well, I like to think that I am far from typical, as far as GMs go.” Twilight grinned, then cleared her throat. “Ladies and gentleman, welcome to a monumental Friday Night Ascension! The most captivating part of your Friday nights!”

“I’m Celestia Regal, joined as always by my colleague, Discord Redrum,” said Celestia. “And, quite the pleasant surprise, guest commentator for tonight’s affairs will be the General Manager of Friday Night Ascension, twelve-time EWF World Champion, The Magician, Twilight Sparkle! Happy to have you here, Twilight.”

“Happy to be here. Truthfully, I’ve missed being this close to the action,” said Twilight. “Can you feel the electricity in the air?”

“I can feel Diamond Tiara’s righteous fury, is what I can feel,” said Discord. “Twilight Sparkle, I have no problem telling you that this is a massive injustice! Scootaloo is nowhere near as deserving of a title shot as Diamond Tiara!”

“I wouldn’t worry too much about that, Discord,” said Twilight. “I’d be very surprised if Diamond Tiara loses this coming match.”

“Are you sure it’s wise to underestimate a competitor like Scootaloo?” asked Celestia. “She clearly has heart.”

“Oh, without question. But this isn’t about her heart, or even her skill in the ring. It’s about her temper.

Diamond angrily began down the ramp, tossing the list to the ground and stamping on it angrily. She slid into the ring, her face a menacing scowl as she waited for opponent to make herself known. Diamond would get this done quickly so she could have time to prepare for the Ultimate Opportunity match.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Ponyville, weighing in at 135 pounds, who would like to be announced as The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling, DIAMOND TIARA!”

Diamond didn’t even bother posturing for the crowd, she was so focused on crushing the girl who had assaulted her. The cold, industrial sounds of Scootaloo’s theme kicked in, giving way to Scootaloo herself. Diamond immediately tensed up, which brought a smile to Scootaloo’s face. She pointed forward with her baseball bat, then rushed the ring. The referee rang the bell for the match to begin just as Scootaloo slid into the ring.

Diamond managed to get the upper hand, smashing Scootaloo’s skull with clubbing forearms. Scootaloo brought a knee to Diamond’s chest, then savagely swung her bat into Diamond’s middle. Diamond dropped to the ground, thrashing in agony as Scootaloo brought her bat down once, twice, three more times before tossing the bat onto the ground and rolling out of the ring.

“Mh-hm. That’s about what I expected,” sighed Twilight. “I wish those two could just have a proper match. I’ve no doubt that they can put on some incredible displays. It’s a shame, really.”

“Agreed. But, alas, there’s not much that can be done for it,” said Celestia.

“Actually… There is. I’ve got a few ideas in mind for those two, but that’s going to have to wait.”

“Something we won’t have to wait for, however, is for the Patron Saint of the Ring to get her Intercontinental Championship back,” said Discord. “Because we’ve got ourselves a rematch: Luna Regal versus Rarity Valentine, next!”

Rarity’s somber piano theme floated out, which melted seamlessly into the epic march of the Patron Saint of the Ring. Rarity strolled down the ramp, sliding deftly into the ring.

“Ooh, I'm excited about this one,” said Twilight. “Such a wonderful technician, that Valentine. In particular, her Figure-four leglock is one of the best I've seen. Not to discount Luna, of course, with that fantastic Tantabus, and a set of hands that I wouldn’t want to go five rounds with. Wonderful match-up, wouldn't you say?”

“I couldn't have worded it better myself,” agreed Celestia. “I can't speak for Valentine, but Luna has dedicated her life to being the best in the ring. That's what makes her so dangerous. Luna has the tools and the talent.”

“But something she won't have for long,” cut in Discord. “Is the Intercontinental championship.”

“Is that so?” asked Twilight. “Personally, I think it's anyone's match.”

There's a Nightmare inside!

Luna Regal burst onto the scene, to thunderous applause. She pulled the Intercontinental championship from her waist and held it high over her head as she briskly descended down the ramp and entered the ring. She handed the belt to the referee, tugging on the ring ropes idly.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! And it is for the EWF Intercontinental Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, from Canterlot City, weighing in at 146 pounds, RARITY VALENTINE!”

The crowd booed, which only added to the clear determination on Rarity’s face. She kept glancing at the championship, preparing to take it by any means necessary.

“And her opponent, from Canterlot City, weighing in at 195 pounds, she is the current EWF Intercontinental Champion… The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

Luna jumped to the middle rope, giving a beastly roar and infecting the crowd with her unique, monstrous energy.

The referee showed each competitor the belt, then handed it to the timekeeper. The bell rang, and the match began.

Immediately, Luna grabbed Rarity in a tie-up, forcing her into the corner. She rocketed a fist into Rarity’s middle, then another, working the body for nearly every second of the referee’s five-count.

“Luna off to an intense start,” noted Twilight. “Clearly doesn't want Valentine to build any momentum, which is an intelligent move.”

As soon as Luna was backed away, Rarity rolled under the bottom rope and to ringside. She clutched her ribs gingerly, taking a moment to catch her breath. Luna rolled out of the ring, running around to her opponent, who quickly rolled back into the ring. Luna followed again, finding herself in a much less favorable position than earlier.

Rarity stomped firmly on the champion’s lower back. She quickly dragged Luna to the center of the ring, wrapping her legs around Luna’s in hopes of locking in the Figure-four. Luna countered, kicking Rarity forward and sending her crashing into the turnbuckle.

“Rarity hoping to get the match over as quickly as possible,” said Twilight. “Which, personally, I find to be wishful thinking. The only way you're going to beat a competitor like Luna Regal is to wear her down. Tire her out. Otherwise, things like that will happen.”

Luna hopped to her feet, grabbed Rarity by the arm, and flung her to the opposite corner. Rarity collided firmly, rebounding into a running boot from Luna, who dropped for a cover.

One! Two!

Rarity forced her shoulder up with no time to spare. Luna smirked slightly, rolling off of her opponent and pulling herself up onto the middle rope. She let out another bestial shout, eliciting another pop from the crowd. With her back turned, she didn't notice Rarity crawling up behind her.

Rarity quickly grabbed Luna and brought her down, pinning her shoulders to the mat.

One! Two!

As the referee’s hand neared the mat for three, he glanced up and saw Rarity with a fistful of Luna’s tights. He pulled Rarity off, reprimanding her and reminding her of the rules.

“Ooh, your sister's posturing almost cost her in a big way,” hummed Discord, unable to keep his amusement to himself. “She better be careful, lest Miss Valentine reclaims what is rightfully hers.”

Rarity and Luna both hurried to their feet, reaching a vertical base at nearly the same time. Rarity made a wild swing, which Luna easily ducked. The champion brought a boot to Rarity’s middle, bending her over at the waist.

Luna wasted no time in turning to press Rarity’s head to her own back. She hooked their arms together, twisted, and hoisted Rarity into the air, suspending her upside-down. Luna dropped straight down, slamming Rarity’s head against the mat with a sickening thud.

“And there's the match,” said Twilight. “You could count to a hundred, Rarity Valentine is not kicking out of that.”

“The Eternal Night has yet to fail Luna,” agreed Celestia. “No one has ever kicked out of it. This match is good and finished.”

Luna bowed to the fans, then dropped onto Rarity and hooked her leg for the pin.

One! Two! Three!

Luna rose to her feet, accepting her title from the referee. She slung it over her shoulder, grinning wildly as the referee raised her hand in victory.

“The winner, and still EWF Intercontinental Champion, The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

“Impressive display. Luna is shaping up to be quite the champion,” said Celestia.

“Which means she needs tougher competition,” said Twilight. “Which, judging by the look on her face, is something she'll be looking forward to. I'll be looking into that… Anyway, what do we have next?”

“That would be Ember Torch, battling to reclaim her EWF Nationals Championship, in a match against The Equalizer, Starlight Glimmer!”

Luna rolled out of the ring, strolling past the paramedics who were rolling a stretcher to retrieve Rarity’s motionless, unconscious body.

The arena’s quiet was split by the screeching of an electric guitar. Ember Torch slinked down to the ring to her own punk rock theme, rolling into the ring to a unanimous blanket of boos. Ember bounced in place, shadowboxing in an attempt to prepare herself for the match.

Starlight’s snare drums sounded, giving way to The Equalizer herself. Her boos were even louder than Ember’s, the crowd’s hatred for her thick enough to cut with a knife. They despised her for stealing a win from right under the crowd favorite, Pinkie Pie. Starlight ignored the crowd’s displeasure and stepped into the ring, unstrapping her belt and handing it to the referee.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall, and it is for the EWF Nationals Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, from The Badlands, weighing in at 132 pounds, The Dragon Lord, EMBER TORCH!”

The crowd made their opinions on Ember very clear, chanting “Ember sucks!” near-unanimously. Ember ignored them, focusing entirely on Starlight Glimmer.

“And her opponent, from Our Town, weighing in at 152 pounds, she is the current EWF Nationals champion… The Equalizer, STARLIGHT GLIMMER!”

Starlight’s negative reaction dwarfed Ember’s, the jeers and insults from the capacity crowd overpowering the arena. The Equalizer didn’t seem to notice, instead staring at her opponent with a look of unflinching concentration.

“Oh, boy, am I excited for this one,” said Twilight. “The Equalizer and The Dragon Lord, two of the brightest women to ever hold the Nationals championship. It’s a shame Pinkie couldn’t be here for this match. That Triple Threat match of theirs was fantastic!”

“Pie is the only one of those three that doesn’t need to be here,” said Discord. “She’s a joke! An embarrassment to this company!”

“Let me tell you something, Discord. I’ve been watching Pinkie since the start of her career. I’ve helped guide her to where she is now: a fan favorite and one of the most entertaining performers we have here. Whether you agree with her image or not is one thing, but you cannot deny her talent.”

“And we’re off,” said Celestia, drawing attention back to the match. “Starlight Glimmer versus Ember Torch, Nationals Championship rematch! Glimmer and Torch staring each other down, vying for some sort of mental foothold in this match.”

Starlight and Ember stared at each other, strafing one another in the ring. Starlight seemed apprehensive, reaching nervously for Ember once or twice before retreating back. She ran a hand through her hair, stretching slightly in an attempt to ready herself. Ember stopped, stood straight up, and slowly turned to look up the ramp. Starlight followed her gaze, locking eyes with Ember when she turned back.

“Hm? What’s this?” asked Twilight. “Something’s off here…”

Ember and Starlight nodded to one another, then dropped down and slid out of the ring. Starlight strolled around to the timekeeper, swiped her championship, and followed Ember up the ramp. All in attendance murmured in confusion as the referee began his count of ten.

“This is… strange, to say the least,” said Celestia. “What are they doing?”

“This is absolutely absurd!” complained Discord. “Do you have anything to do with this, General Manager Sparkle?”

“Absolutely not. Why would I do anything to ruin such a promising match?” asked Twilight. “No, I didn’t do this, but I think I know who did…”

Starlight and Ember arrived at the top to of the ramp, staring back down at the now empty ring. Ember offered her fist to Starlight, who stared at it uneasily. Then, with a shake of the head, she fist-bumped Ember, and the two disappeared backstage just as the referee reached ten and called for the bell.

“I’ll be right back. I need to have a word backstage,” said Twilight. She pulled off her headset, grabbed her cane and briefcase, then ran as fast as she could up the ramp and to the backstage area.

“Well, while Twilight is getting that sorted, we’ll be getting prepared for a historic ladder match,” said Celestia. “The first ever Ultimate Opportunity match, to determine the future of the EWF, and that’s next…”

Twilight hobbled into the locker room, filled with the five competitors in the Ultimate Opportunity match. Twilight immediately locked gazes with Ember, limping over until they were nose to nose. They glared at one another, each trying to make the other submit through intimidation alone.

“Clear out the locker room,” said Twilight. “Get ready for your match, meet me by the ramp.”

Everyone except Ember filed out of the locker room, leaving the Dragon Lord alone with Ascension’s General Manager. When the room was empty, Twilight began to lay into the former Nationals Champion.

“What’s your play, Torch?” asked Twilight.

“Don’t know what you mean,” said Ember.

“The double countout. Why? What do you gain?”

“I had nothing to do with—”

Twilight brought her cane up, pressing it beneath Ember’s chin. Despite her age and injuries, she was still insanely intimidating. Even Ember, who feared no competitor in the ring, flinched slightly at Twilight’s presence.

“Don’t screw with me, Torch,” said Twilight. “What’s the plan here?”

“I don’t have a plan, Sparkle,” said Ember, pushing the cane out of her face. “I just wanted to be fresh for the ladder match, and Glimmer didn’t want to risk losing her championship. A double countout was mutually beneficial.”

“I know you don’t have a plan,” growled Twilight. “But she does. And let me make this perfectly clear, Ms. Torch.” Twilight jabbed Ember in the chest with her index finger. “If you and her do anything at all to ruin the Ultimate Opportunity, I will make you regret it. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

“Crystal,” said Ember simply. Twilight gave her one last stare, then turned and limped for the door.

“Get ready for the match! We’re about to make history!”

Twilight strolled down to the ring to the sounds of unanimous, thunderous applause. Though she was very much so angry with the situation, she still couldn’t help but smile at the energy and excitement of the crowd. Twilight slid between the ropes, setting the briefcase down in the center of the ring. She took a microphone from the announcer and flipped it on.

“The following contest is the Ultimate Opportunity Ladder match!” said Twilight. “This match will only end when one competitor retrieves the briefcase suspended above the ring!” A cable slowly descended from the ceiling, drifting to the ground. At the same time, several members of the ring staff emerged from backstage, carrying ladders of varying heights down the ramp. As they set them up along the ramp, Twilight hooked the briefcase to the cable and gestured for it to be raised high above the ring.

“If the competitors would make their way to the ring…”

The five wrestler’s competing in the match made their way down to the ring, some (like Ember and Diamond) were laser-focused on the briefcase. Others (like Pinkie and the two unknown wrestlers Diamond mocked earlier) were excitedly cheering with the crowd. The five competitors slid into the ring, each glancing at each other and the briefcase.

Pinkie Pie grinned, pointing up at the briefcase, then to each of her opponents, then to the mat. Ember snarled at the display, crossing the ring to stand face to face with Pinkie, who simply grinned and leaned back into the corner.

“Introducing first, the former EWF Nationals Champion, The Dragon Lord, Ember Torch!” said Twilight, gesturing to Ember. The Dragon Lord shook her head in annoyance, then found a corner opposite of Pinkie. “And, one of her opponents, The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling, Diamond Tiara!”

Diamond Tiara raised a fist above her head, clutching her rib gingerly with the other arm. Scootaloo’s attack had clearly taken a toll on the self-proclaimed Crown Jewel of the EWF.

“And, making their EWF debut, the Crusaders, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle!”

The two newcomers fistbumped, tugging on the ropes idly in preparation for the match. If there ever was a time to make a name for themselves it would be in the first ever Ultimate Opportunity ladder match.

“And, finally, The Outlandish, The Flamboyant, The Absurd, The Insane, The Outrageous, Pinkamena Diane Pie!” called Twilight. Pinkie rose from her corner, throwing her hands into the air to the unanimous roars of the crowd. Twilight wished them all luck, her gaze stalling on Ember for a bit, then slipped out of the ring and back to the commentary table.

“And I’m back,” said Twilight. “Time for the main event! Who do you have as the favorite to win this match?”

“Diamond Tiara, obviously,” said Discord. “Even with cracked ribs, The Crown Jewel is the greatest competitor in that ring!”

“I myself am betting on one of the newcomers. Though this is their first night in the EWF, Sweetie Belle and Applebloom have rather illustrious careers in this business,” said Celestia. “Sweetie Belle, former Crystal Empire Wrestling Bantamweight champion and younger sister of the EWF’s former IC champion Rarity Valentine. There’s also former Appleloosa Valley World Champion and younger sister of the EWF’s very own AJ in Applebloom. One could say that wrestling is in their blood. But, in this sort of match, anything can happen.”

“Without question,” agreed Twilight. “And it's going to happen right here, on Friday Night Ascension!”

The bell sounded, signaling the start of a history-making match. Time seemed to slow as the competitors in the match stared up at the briefcase, suspended who knows how high above their heads. Though the five were about as different as could be, they all reached the same conclusion: that briefcase was the greatest prize imaginable.

Diamond Tiara rushed for the nearest person, Sweetie Belle, and clobbered her over the head. As Sweetie hit the ground, Diamond swung at her partner, catching Applebloom in the side of the head with a series of fierce hooks.

Then, all hell broke loose.

Pinkie Pie ran forward, leaping onto Ember and raining down fierce strikes onto her head, much to the crowd’s joy. Once Ember was planted, Pinkie hopped up and charged Diamond, bashing her with her shoulder against the ropes. As Diamond rebounded, Pinkie hoisted her up, spun, and slammed her directly onto her back.

“Pinkie Pie the first to take control here,” said Twilight. “It’s incredible what she can accomplish once she has her sights set on a goal.”

Pinkie rolled out of the ring, hurried up the ramp and, to a loud pop from the crowd, grabbed a ladder and returned to the ring. She slid the ladder in the ring and followed after it, but couldn’t even start setting it up before Ember was back on her feet and battering her with stiff elbow bashes to the face.

“Pie wanted to be up and down that ladder as quickly as possible, but The Dragon Lord says nay,” said Discord. “Pie’s spontaneous nature might be her undoing in this sort of match.”

Ember continued her vicious assault, backing Pinkie against the ropes. Ember leapt into the air and drove both feet into Pinkie’s chest, sending her over the top rope and to the floor.

“Ember making a rather smart decision here by eliminating Pinkie from the match, if even for a short period of time,” said Twilight. “It’s far easier to scale a ladder when your opponents are outside of the ring.”

Ember quickly set up the ladder, positioning it carefully under the briefcase. She scaled the ladder quickly, not making it more than halfway up before Diamond Tiara grabbed her and brought her back down to the ground. The two stared each other down, sizing one another up. Ember raised her hands in surrender, slowly pointing to the two women behind Diamond. The so-called Wrestling Princess glanced at the rookies behind her and nodded to Ember.

Ember grabbed Applebloom, while Diamond grabbed Sweetie, both of them bringing the fallen rookies up to their feet. With measured precision and viciousness, they battered the debuting stars, reducing them to a heap on the floor. Ember grabbed the ladder, and slammed it firmly onto Applebloom’s chest. Diamond kept one eye on her ally at all times, even as she sat Sweetie in the corner and viciously stomped her in the chest.

“Ember Torch and Diamond Tiara forming an alliance of sorts,” noted Celestia. “One can only wonder how long that will last for them.”

“I imagine longer than one might expect,” said Twilight. “Both Ember and Diamond are intelligent, and they know that they’ll need to work together. Otherwise, The Crusaders’ number game might prove to be too much.”

“That said, there can only be one winner, and I don’t think either of these women would be okay with it being the other.”

Pinkie slowly climbed onto the apron, clutching her back gingerly. Before she could return to the contest, Ember rushed over and brought an elbow to the side of her head, sending Pinkie tumbling back to the outside. With what she considered to be her biggest threat out of the way, Ember returned to Applebloom.

Applebloom caught The Dragon Lord off guard, punching her firmly in the ribs. The rookie fought her way back into the match with quick, stiff strikes. She battled her way up, pushing Ember back and creating much-needed separation.

“Applebloom back in this contest, very similar to her older sister in the way she strikes,” said Celestia. “Very stiff, very brawl-y style. This style of offense is what brought her great success in Appleloosa Valley.”

Applebloom clenched her fist and stiffly jabbed Ember, catching her in the jaw. She swung again and again, stunning the former Nationals Champion before backing up to get a running start and deliver a striking knee to Ember’s middle. Applebloom dropped Ember to her knees, then kicked her firmly in the side of the head.

Meanwhile Diamond Tiara was picking the other rookie apart. She dropped Sweetie Belle to the ground, stamping firmly on her ankle. Diamond pulled Sweetie to the edge of the ring, bending her leg over the bottom rope and wrenching down. With no referee to count for a disqualification, Diamond was free to torment Sweetie for as long as she wanted. She wasn’t able to lock in her hold for long before she was interrupted by Applebloom, who dragged her to her feet and immediately began working the body.

“Applebloom very intelligently working the midsection of Diamond Tiara,” said Twilight. “As you no doubt recall, Diamond has been favoring her ribs ever since Scootaloo’s vicious attack on her during last Monday’s Magic.”

“Which is why I’ve been so confused as to why that dirty little punk hasn’t been punished yet!” complained Discord. “She may have cost Diamond Tiara this opportunity! What if, somehow, one of these rookies wins this match because the Crown Jewel of the EWF wasn’t at 100%? What will you do then, Miss General Manager?”

“What I will do then, Discord, is suggest that, perhaps next time, she should refrain from attacking a poor, unsuspecting girl outside of the bounds of an official match.”

“Are you saying she deserved what she got?!”

“I’m saying that she may have opened Pandora’s Box,” said Twilight. “Perhaps this will be the lesson she needs.”

“Back to the match at hand, Applebloom building up a head of steam,” said Celestia, drawing attention back to the scuffle in the ring. “As you said, Applebloom working the body while her friend and partner Sweetie Belle works her way to her feet.” Sweetie gingerly limped to her partner, joining in on the onslaught. They battered Diamond, overwhelming her with the sheer numbers.

While those three were distracted and Pinkie was deposited outside of the ring, Ember Torch saw her opportunity; She quickly jumped to her feet, adjusting the ladder and scaling it as quickly as she could.

“Ember, trying to steal a historical victory!” called Celestia. Applebloom and Sweetie Belle dropped Diamond to stop Ember before it was too late. They each grabbed a leg of the former Nationals champion, lifted her from the ladder, and slammed her down to the mat with a thunderous boom.

“Stunning double powerbomb from the rookies from the indie circuit,” said Twilight. “That’s good teamwork, but it cannot possibly last for much longer. Reminders, ladies and gentlemen, this match will be won by the first competitor to scale the ladder and return with the Ultimate Opportunity briefcase. There are no team victories here.”

As Diamond rolled out of the ring, the Crusaders stood tall, the only two standing. They looked up at the briefcase, smiling to one another with satisfaction. Now, it was just a matter of deciding which of them actually got to win the match.

Their attempts at discussion were interrupted by the cold, industrial, mechanical beats of Scootaloo’s entrance theme. She made for the ring with a determined glare, clutching her steel bat tightly. She ran down the ramp as fast as she could, gunning for Diamond.

“Look at this! This is getting out of hand!” shouted Discord. “Someone get this maniac out of the arena! She’s not even in this match!”

“Unfortunately for Diamond, there is no disqualification in a ladder match,” said Celestia. “There is nothing anyone can do to stop this.”

Scootaloo neared Diamond, her bat raised over her head with the intent of cracking Diamond’s skull open. She swung down and missed, then missed again as Diamond repeatedly avoided her strikes. Diamond quickly spun on her heel and kicked Scootaloo in the side of her head, dropping her to the ground. Fury was the dominant emotion on her face as she clutched her ribs, the past assaults still fresh in her mind.

Diamond glanced at the briefcase suspended above the ring, then at the Crusaders, then, finally, to the bat laying next to Scootaloo. She grabbed it up and slammed it directly down onto Scootaloo’s back with a sickening thud. Diamond swung savagely onto her rival’s back with the intent of breaking her in two.

“That’s right, Diamond!” cheered Discord. “Show her why you’re the Crown Jewel of the EWF!”

“It seems as if Diamond Tiara has given up on this match,” said Celestia. “Her rage seems to be clouding her judgement. This is her chance to make history!”

The Crusaders watched uneasily as Diamond Tiara beat and brutalized Scootaloo, having a quick discussion amongst themselves. They both pointed to Diamond, then ran for the ropes. They rebounded and dove out of the ring, colliding with Diamond Tiara and bringing them all to the ground, much to the crowd’s enjoyment.

“And The Crusaders have put themselves out of the match in an attempt to save Scootaloo!” called Celestia. “How noble!”

“And stupid,” added Discord. “They had the match good as won! And they threw it all away! Who’s left to capitalize now?”

Slowly, Ember fought to her feet, falling back into the corner and using the ropes for support. She did a quick scan around the ring and smiled, then, as quickly as she could, started up the ladder.

Suddenly, Pinkie Pie rushed into the ring, scaling up the ladder with Ember. The two reached the top, Ember a bit earlier than Pinkie, and quickly went to fisticuffs. Ember swung stiffly into the side of Pinkie’s head, stunning her enough for Ember to find her opening. She grabbed Pinkie around the neck in a front facelock, pulled her forward, and wrenched back to apply pressure on the neck as well as cut off oxygen to the brain.

“Ember Torch, resourceful as ever, locking in that improvised guillotine choke from the top of the ladder! If she can knock Pie unconscious, that briefcase is as good as hers!”

The crowd waited with bated breath as Pinkie struggled fruitlessly in the submission. Ember doubled her efforts, draining the life from her opponent and bringing herself closer and closer to victory. Pinkie fought, grabbing at Ember’s hands, but her grip was too tight. She slumped, unable to continue struggling. Ember released her grip and climbed a bit higher, reaching for the briefcase that could change her career.

“And it’s over!” cheered Discord. “The Dragon Lord is about to claim the Ultimate Opportunity!”

Pinkie quickly rose up, smashing her head into Ember’s sternum. The Dragon Lord swayed, teetering back dangerously. Pinkie hopped up to the topmost rung of the ladder and firmly bashed her head against Ember’s, sending the former Nationals champion crashing to the mat. The crowd exploded into cheers as Pinkie reached up and unhooked the briefcase, claiming the Ultimate Opportunity as her own.

“Yes! Pinkie Pie wins!” cheered Twilight. She jumped from her seat, applauding the victor wildly. “History has been made! The first ever Ultimate Opportunist is in that ring, ladies and gentlemen. Take a good long look at your future EWF World Champion!”

Pinkie Pie stood tall, holding her future title shot above her head, basking in the glow from the crowd. She grinned widely, slapping the briefcase before sliding down the ladder and parading around the arena with her prize in tow.

“Truly, a historic night,” said Celestia. “I don’t doubt that Trixie Lulamoon’s title reign will come to an end sooner rather than later.”

“This is absurd! That title shot belongs to Diamond Tiara!” complained Discord. “If anyone deserves it, it’s her!”

“Don’t you see? That’s the beauty of this title shot!” said Twilight. “Now that Pinkie can cash in on Trixie, when she wins, I can make whatever title matches I please! Pinkie earned herself an opportunity, but she also opened up that opportunity for everyone backstage! This changes everything!”

“It was a brilliant idea, Twilight,” said Celestia. “And it was wonderful experiencing this monumental night with you.

“EWF Universe, it has been my genuine pleasure to be out here with you tonight,” said Twilight. “This has been Twilight Sparkle, Discord Redrum, and Celestia Regal. Until next time, friends. Good night!”

Monday Night Magic III

Celestia Regal stood in the ring, clutching a microphone to the general applause of the crowd. She was something of a fan-favorite commentator, offering insightful analysis of all competitors, regardless of her personal feelings to them.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the first ever Ultimate Opportunist,” said Celestia. “The Outrageous Pinkamena Diane Pie!”

Pinkie’s theme song hit, supercharging the crowd with her unique, infectious energy. Pinkie jumped down the ramp, holding her briefcase high above her head. She grinned the whole way, sliding into the ring and scaling the turnbuckle. She raised the briefcase up, slapping it firmly as the crowd serenaded her with cheers. She dropped down and met with Celestia in the middle of the ring, shaking her hand and giving her a hug.

“Hello, Pinkamena, nice to have you out here,” said Celestia.

“It’s nice to be here. And please,” said Pinkie. “Just Pinkie is fine.”

“Alright, then, Pinkie, I’m sure the entire EWF Universe wants to know… How does it feel to make history as the first ever Ultimate Opportunist?”

“It feels good, Celestia. It feels really good! Not just to win the briefcase, but to give the fans what they want.” Pinkie pointed to the crowd, smiling while she did. “And what they want is a new EWF World Champion!”

To prove her right, the crowd burst into loud, raucous cheers. Pinkie smiled even wider, bowing to the crowd before returning to the interview.

“And when do you expect to cash in that opportunity?” asked Celestia.

“Let me tell you something, Celestia, cause I’ve been thinking about it long and hard,” said Pinkie. “And I realized that this briefcase… It’s like a big ‘ol piece of chocolate cake. Sure, it’s delicious, but you probably wanna wait until a special occasion to tear into it. So I should probably save it for the right time.”

The crowd let out a collective “Aww”, disappointed that they would have to wait to see a history-changing match.

“Buuuuut, I’ve always been really bad with diets,” continued Pinkie, patting her belly. “And I always eat that piece of cake as soon as I get it! So I’m cashing in the Ultimate Opportunity right here, right now, on the EWF World Champion!”

There was silence for a few moments, save for the explosive reaction from the crowd. Nothing happened at all for a solid minute, and then a classy, extravagant theme floated through the arena. The champion made herself visible, stepping out in light blue ring trunks and gear. Trixie held the title over her shoulder, then brought a microphone up to her mouth.

“I know what you are all expecting,” said Trixie, ignoring the boos. “You're expecting me to weasel my way out of this title defense. To suspend Pie, or leave the arena, or something. But you all are forgetting something.” Trixie raised the title high above her head. “You're forgetting that Trixie is your champion! The Great and Powerful Trixie is the greatest EWF champion in history! And if Pie wants to challenge me, then so be it!”

There was a genuine pop at that. Even those hopeful for a title change didn't think it would be so easy.

“I only have one request,” continued Trixie. “It's been years since I was last ring-ready. Give me until the end of the show to get ready. Let's make this the main event!”

“What do you think, guys?” asked Pinkie, taking the mic from Celestia. “Do you guys wanna see me versus Trixie in the main event tonight?” The crowd exploded, transferring from general cheers to chants of “Let's go, Pinkie!” and “Trixie sucks!” “Well, there you have it, Trix! I'll see you in the main event!”

Pinkie dropped the mic and raised her fists over her head, bathing in the glow of the crowd. She pointed to Trixie, who just nodded as she walked off to prepare for her first match in years.

“Welcome one, welcome all!” said Discord. “To Monday Night Magic! The most exciting part of your dreary Monday! I'm Discord Redrum, joined, as always, by my broadcasting partner, Celestia Regal.”

“We've got an action-packed night ahead of us, folks,” said Celestia, bubbling with excitement. “Tonight, for the first time in nearly ten years, the EWF World Championship will go on the line in our main event: The Wicked Witch, Trixie Lulamoon versus The Ultimate Opportunist, Pinkamena Diane Pie!”

“But first, opening the show, we will be blessed by the presence of the hottest young star in the EWF!”

Diamond Tiara’s classical fanfare blared, marking her arrival. She walked to the ring with a purpose, a few choice words in mind for everyone in attendance.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome DIAMOND TIARA!”

Diamond slipped into the ring, snatching the mic from the announcer. She brought the mic to her lips, then lowered it when the crowd decided to boo incessantly. Her lip twitched angrily, but she managed to stop herself from shouting immediately.

“When I speak, you don’t,” said Diamond angrily. To the surprise of only Diamond, the crowd’s boos not only kept going, but actively got louder. “Quiet. Quiet. Quiet!” With every word, the boos got stronger and more raucous. “Understand this, you morons, I’m not leaving until I said what I need to say. So cram it!” She stood her ground, watching the crowd around her with contempt. After a few moments, the noise died down and Diamond was allowed to speak. “Good. I’ve got a few things to say.

“Last Friday, I was poised to win the Ultimate Opportunity. I had it in the bag. But then… That dirty, talentless street rat Scootaloo stuck her nose in my business! It should be me who’s the Ultimate Opportunist, not that joke Pinkamena Pie!” The crowd immediately began chanting for Pinkie, which did little more than annoy Diamond. “But that’s a problem for another day. For now, I want this thorn out of my side, once and for all! So, Scootaloo, bring your ass out here so I can send you back to Developmental where you belong!”

There was a moment of silence, save for the general murmuring of the crowd. It wasn’t Scootaloo’s music that played, but a soft, angelic hymn. Down the ramp came Sweetie Belle, clutching a microphone as she approached the ring. She wore silver trunks with a tri-color shield on the butt, and a similarly silver top. She brought the mic to her mouth, waiting for an opportunity to talk.

“Who the hell are you?” demanded Diamond Tiara. “If I recall, I asked for Scootaloo, and, unless you’ve done a major make-over, you’re not her!”

“Well, sorry to break it to you, but Scootaloo isn’t here tonight,” said Sweetie Belle. “You busted her up pretty bad, and she’s at home getting better.” Sweetie Belle shrugged her shoulders, shaking her head in disappointment. “You really hurt her on Friday, which me and Bloom just couldn’t deal with. And we made a decision. We decided that Scootaloo is a friend of ours now, an honorary Crusader, and we Crusaders take care of our own. So, since Scootaloo isn’t here to fight you…” Sweetie Belle flashed the crowd a shining, million-dollar smile. “You seem to want a match tonight. I’d be more than happy to fill in.”

Sweetie dropped her mic and ran for the ring, sliding under the bottom rope. As soon as she was up she met with Diamond in the center of the ring, each of them swinging wildly at one another.

“We've got a brawl on our hands!” cheered Discord. “Finally, Diamond Tiara gets the justice she deserves!”

“We don't even have an official ready for this match!” said Celestia. “This is just a fight, no match to be had!”

As if hearing and sympathizing with Celestia’s outrage, a referee quickly ran to the ring from backstage. He slid into the ring and pried the two girls apart. He kept them each at arm’s length, checking them both for damage. After they both insisted that they wanted to continue, the referee reluctantly called for the bell.

Diamond immediately pushed past the referee and leapt onto Sweetie Belle, raining down hard right hands. Diamond then switched to a quick pin, which didn't even get a one count before Sweetie kicked out. They both scurried to their feet and locked up in the middle of the ring.

“Diamond Tiara, quickly taking control of this match,” said Discord. “No doubt trying to end this annoyance as quickly as possible.”

Diamond transitioned to a side headlock, wrenching Sweetie to her knees. Diamond quickly released the hold and delivered a skull-rattling kick to the side of the head before dropping down for the pin.

One! Two!

Sweetie Belle managed to kick out, but was allowed no reprieve; Diamond grabbed Sweetie by the hair, ignoring the referee’s shouts to release her, and dragged her to the corner. She held Sweetie’s head in place with her left hand and used her right for stiff, heavy strikes. Diamond planned to use every single second of the referee’s five-count, getting over a dozen hits in before the referee it it four. She swung one last time, only to have her fist caught by Sweetie.

Not releasing Diamond’s hand, Sweetie swung kick after kick into Diamond’s thigh, backing her away from the corner. Sweetie laced their fingers together, forming a tight grip, then ran for the corner. She climbed turnbuckles and springboarded, spinning around Diamond and bringing her down into a brutal Tornado DDT.

“Incredible maneuver! Look at the velocity of that hit!” said Celestia. “Sweetie Belle just about sent Diamond Tiara through the mat! And the cover!”

One! Two!

Diamond Tiara just barely managed to kick out, then quickly rolled out of the ring, clutching her head and neck. Sweetie Belle beckoned for her opponent, grinning slyly as she did. Diamond slowly returned to the ring, keeping her eyes on Sweetie Belle the whole time.

Diamond ran forward, ducking under a clothesline from Sweetie. She swung her foot back, aiming to bury her foot in Diamond’s middle; Sweetie caught the leg and swept Diamond to the ground, then wrapped her legs around Diamond’s, cinching in the Figure-Four Leglock.

“Sweetie’s borrowed a little something from her sister! She's got that Leglock locked in, in the middle of the ring where nowhere to go!” said Celestia. “It’s only a matter of time before she taps!”

“You stop doubting the Pro Wrestling Princess! She’s the best in the world, god damn it, and you will show her some respect!” shouted Discord, his outrage mounting. “Diamond Tiara is one of the most gifted stars in the history of the sport! She can break a basic Figure-Four!”

As if to prove him right, Diamond began fighting out of the submission, slamming her fist against Sweetie’s ankle, trying her hardest to break the hold. As she struggled in agony, an idea brewed in her head, some way to break out. Diamond rocked, turning to her side, then onto her stomach, reversing the leverage and applying pressure onto Sweetie Belle’s legs.

“Look at that! Genius reversal from Diamond Tiara!” said Discord, clapping his hands. “Maybe it’ll be Sweetie Belle who taps!”

Sweetie Belle quickly pulled herself forward, grabbing onto the bottom rope to force the break and dash Discord’s hopes. Diamond untangled her legs and got to her feet first, vying for an advantage. She swung once, twice, three times, connecting with strong right hooks every time. She went for a fourth when Sweetie caught the fist for the second time; She wasted no time in running for the corner and climbing the turnbuckle.

Diamond brought her free arm forward, smashing her forearm into Sweetie before she could get her jump. Her opponent stunned and teetering on the top turnbuckle, Diamond springboarded off of the middle rope and brought Sweetie down to the mat with her devastating finisher.

“Girl’s Best Friend!” cheered Discord. “And it’s over!”

One! Two! Three!

Diamond Tiara stood up with a devious smirk plastered across her face. Before the announcer could declare her the winner, she snatched the microphone away, shoving the announcer to the ground. The crowd exploded into boos, but Diamond didn't let that stop her from speaking.

“See that? See what I did to her?” said Diamond. “You could’ve stopped this! But you won’t, will you? You’re a coward, Scootaloo! You like to take cheap shots with baseball bats and send your friends to do your dirty work!” Diamond grabbed Sweetie by the hair, pulling her up to her knees. “And this is what happens. This is what happens when you face off with the Crown Jewel of the EWF.”

Diamond clubbed Sweetie over the head with the microphone, dropping her to the ground like a bag of rocks. She laid in on the battered rookie, delivering kick after kick into Sweetie Belle’s head. Diamond dropped to her knees and rained down hard strikes to Sweetie’s face, to the sounds of thunderous boos all around.

“You can stop this anytime!” Diamond shouted into her mic. “All you have to do is come out and face me! Save your friend, Scootaloo! Unless you’re too scared to do it!”

Diamond returned to her onslaught and smashed the microphone against Sweetie’s head yet again. She managed to break through the skin, and a noticeable flow of red trickled down Sweetie Belle’s face.

The hard, industrial notes of Scootaloo’s music hit, followed by Scootaloo herself. She ran down the ramp, clutching her trusty baseball bat tightly. As she slid into the ring, Diamond slid out, running halfway up the ramp. Scootaloo would’ve followed, but she dropped to a knee to help Sweetie when she noticed just how badly she was hurt. Scootaloo picked up the mic from the ground, trembling in anger, and brought it to her lips.

“You made a mistake, Tiara,” said Scootaloo. “You want me so bad? You can have me on Friday. You’d better bring your A-game, princess, because only one of us is walking out of that ring!”

Diamond Tiara smiled and laughed as she backed up the ramp. She bowed to the crowd, which booed her incessantly, then disappeared into the backstage area.

Bon-Bon restlessly paced around the ring, waiting for her opponent to make herself seen. She had been dying for her rematch ever since Lyra cheated a win out with her chair trick. Bon-Bon was the type to learn from history, though, and she made sure that she wouldn’t fall victim to the same trick twice.

Lyra’s angelic harps floated out throughout the arena, followed soon by Lyra herself. She quickly slid into the ring, grinning superiorly at Bon-Bon. As far as Lyra was concerned, she had Bon-Bon’s number. This match was as good as won.

The bell rang, and the competitors met in the middle of the ring, vying for control to start the match.

“And here we go with a rematch, Bon-Bon versus former Intercontinental Champion, Lyra Heartstrings,” said Celestia. “Last time these two locked up in the ring… Well, let’s just say the match had a rather controversial end.”

Unlike last time the two met in the ring, Bon-Bon was in no mood for games. She wrapped her arm around Lyra’s neck in a side headlock, quickly wrenching her to the ground. Lyra pushed her way back to her feet, breaking free of Bon-Bon’s grasp. She shoved Bon-Bon against the ropes, dropping her head down for a back body drop. Bon-Bon stopped herself with the ropes, then ran forward and delivered a stiff kick to Lyra’s jaw. As Lyra recoiled, Bon-Bon grabbed her legs and took her down, dropping onto her for a quick pin.

One!

Lyra kicked out easily, swiftly rolling out of the ring for a breather.

“Bon-Bon seems to be in no hurry for a repeat of what happened last week,” said Celestia as Bon-Bon followed her opponent out of the ring. Lyra ran around the apron, then slid under the bottom rope and back into the ring. Bon-Bon followed her, returning to the ring just in time to receive an avalanche of right hands from her opponent.

“The master strategy of Lyra Heartstrings is what’s going to give her the edge she needs in this match,” said Discord. “That’s the veteran instincts one should come to expect from a former Intercontinental Champion!”

Lyra dragged Bon-Bon to her feet, bending her over at the waist and slipping Bon-Bon’s head between her legs. She grabbed her around the middle and hoisted her up, sitting her on her shoulders. Bon-Bon wriggled free, slid down Lyra’s back and brought her to the ground with a drop toehold, then reached forward to lock her hands around Lyra’s face.

“Incredible reversal!” cheered Celestia as Bon-Bon locked in her hold. “Lyra, clearly going for her signature Hands Down Powerbomb, finds herself in a sticky situation!”

“I feel like you found that candy pun far too amusing…” sighed Discord. “But, yes, Bon-Bon has that Sweet Tooth Facelock cinched in nice and tight. Lyra is going to have to think quickly if she hopes to escape this hold!”

Lyra immediately panicked, squirming and thrashing in a futile attempt to escape the submission. She reached for the bottom rope, with Bon-Bon tugging and wrenching the hold. The referee dropped down to check Lyra for a submission when, in a wild swing for the bottom rope, snatched a fistful of the official’s pant leg. The ref tumbled to the ground, landing on top of Bon-Bon and causing her to lose her grip.

“Disgusting behavior!” shouted Celestia, completely outraged. “Laying your hands on a uniformed official is disrespect for the sanctity of the match in the highest order!”

“Oh, come off it, Regal! That was clearly an accident!” Unsurprisingly, Discord came to Lyra’s defense. “She was reaching for the bottom rope and the ref got in the way! It could’ve happened to anyone!”

The pile of three bodies untangled themselves and stood up, with Lyra facing a very angry referee. She raised her hands in surrender, assuring him that what she had done was unintentional. The official seemed to consider things for a moment before calling for the match to continue. Lyra turned to her opponent, walking directly into a spinning heel from her opponent. Lyra fell backwards, crashing into the referee and knocking him to the ground yet again. This time, however, he didn’t seem able to return to his feet.

“Ah! What about that?” asked Discord. “Bon-Bon used the former Intercontinental champion as a weapon to incapacitate the referee! But, somehow, I have the feeling that we’d never have heard about it from you.”

“An accident! Very obviously unintentional, just as you claim of Heartstrings,” countered Celestia. “Oh dear, it seems that Lyra’s elbow might have caught the referee in the head. We may need a replacement…”

Bon-Bon grabbed a fistful of Lyra’s hair, dragging her to her feet. The former IC champion introduced her elbow into Bon-Bon’s gut, grabbed her around the neck, and drove her head to the ground with a thunderous DDT. She sat up, glanced to the incapacitated referee, then grinned.

“Oh no…” groaned Celestia as Lyra slid out of the ring and reached beneath the apron. “Heartstrings trying the same trick she pulled last week!”

“It worked, didn’t it?” laughed Discord. “Why wouldn’t she try it twice?”

Lyra returned to the ring with a chair, making her way to Bon-Bon, who immediately grabbed at the chair. The two struggled for the steel chair, eventually backing Lyra into a corner. Lyra kicked at Bon-Bon, creating enough separation for her to toss the chair to Bon-Bon and drop against the turnbuckle in faux-unconsciousness.

Bon-Bon held the chair and winced, waiting for the bell to call for the end of the match. When it didn’t come, she turned to the ref, who had his back turned towards them as he used the ropes to pull himself up. Bon-Bon shrugged, then smashed the chair firmly over the top of Lyra’s head and chucked the chair out of the ring.

“Bon-Bon seems to want to beat Lyra at her own game,” said Celestia. Bon-Bon tossed the mostly knocked out Lyra to the ground and covered her. The referee sluggishly turned to face the conflict, dropping down for the count.

One! Two! Three!

Bon-Bon smiled to the crowd, rolled out of the ring, then headed up the ramp as the referee attempted to resuscitate Lyra.

Trixie tapped her foot impatiently as she laced up her boots. It had been ages since she last wore them, and she was getting a bit restless to slip them on. The sooner she got them on, the sooner she could get them off. For her, professional wrestling was just that: a profession. She didn’t have the love or passion for it that her former partner did. It was simply something she was good at, and something she could make a lot of money doing.

There was a knock at the door, which annoyed Trixie to no end.

“Come in,” she snarled. “And it better be important!”

Her door opened and two of her performers rushed in, elbowing each other out of the way in an attempt to speak to the GM before the other. Immediately, Trixie knew that she’d be leaving this exchange with a few more grey hairs than how she entered.

“Trixie!” said Lyra, arriving at the desk first. “I need to talk to you!”

“I was here first, Heartstrings!” snapped Bon-Bon. “Back of the line!”

“You better start showing me some respect, before I kick your candy ass!”

“What do you want?!” snapped Trixie. “I’ll have you know, I have a match to get ready for, so I could do without your raw stupidity right now!”

“She’s a cheater!” said both women, pointing an accusatory finger at the other.

“That chair thing last week gave you a win you didn’t earn,” said Bon-Bon. “You cheated for that win!”

“Uh, hello, there’s no rule against not getting hit with a chair. You shouldn’t have been holding it,” said Lyra, crossing her arms over her chest. “And you should talk about cheating! There’s no rule against not getting hit with a foreign object, but there are definitely rules against hitting your opponent with one!”

“I don’t care! You know what? You two have a match this Friday, at Ascension,” said Trixie. “I’ll send Sparkle an e-mail to set up the match.”

“A tiebreaker,” said Bon-Bon. “For all the marbles. No funny business.”

“Do not cut me off ever again! Truth be told, Trixie just cannot be bothered with your childish bickering.” Trixie finished with her boots, then stood up to stretch. “Your match isn’t against each other. I’m putting you two in a tag team match against Applejack and Sunset Shimmer.”

“What?!” Both women were absolutely shocked and appalled by the decision. They glared at each other, eyes simply leaking contempt.

“This way, you two learn to tolerate each other and they have something to do instead of trying to get a title rematch.” Trixie finished her boot, then picked up her phone and began to dial. “And you better do well, because your jobs are on the line.” Trixie smirked smugly, then pointed for the door. “Now get out! I’ve got a title defense to get ready for, and some phone calls to make!” Lyra and Bon-Bon never took their eyes off of each other as they exited the office, neither overjoyed with their new tag partner. If Trixie noticed, she didn’t especially care. There were far more pressing matters on her mind.

She had a title to defend, and she needed to be totally focused.

The sound of cannon fire rang through the arena, then deep pounding of a bass drum and the clash of cymbals. Tirek slowly, angrily stomped down the ramp and climbed over the top rope easily.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Tartarus, weighing in at 392 pounds, TIREK CRIMSON!”

Tirek gave no reaction as he waited for his opponent. As soon as the music hit, he snarled angrily. The slick guitar riff annoyed him to no end, mostly because he knew that this match would be as unchallenging as his last.

“And for those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of meeting him, allow me to introduce his opponent!” Spike walked out from backstage, his partner right by his side. “From the Badlands, weighing in at 199 pounds, he is The Future of the EWF, The Brave, The Glorious SPIKE EMERALD!”

The crowd applauded and cheered, mostly out of pity. Unless Spike had undergone some serious training since his last encounter with Tirek Crimson, this match would be hard to watch.

“Now, EWF Universe, I know what you’re thinking,” said Spike. “You’re thinking I’m crazy. You’re thinking I’ve got a deathwish. Well, you’ve got that half right, everybody, cause I’m crazy good in the ring and I’ve got Death wishing he could step to me! Ain’t that right, Mac?”

“Eeyup,” came the reply of Spike’s stoic, quiet partner.

“So what, Little Red over there got a win over me? Newsflash, people: Spike Emerald always wins, even when he loses! That first match, Big T, that was a test. That was me seeing what you’re capable of, and I admit… I underestimated you. But I don’t make mistakes and I damn sure don’t repeat em. So I hope you kept a recording of your win over me, because it won’t ever happen again!”

Spike dropped his mic, briskly walking to the ring to the chants and cheers of the capacity crowd. He showed no fear as he slid into the ring, standing toe-to-toe with the hulking mass of destruction that was Tirek Crimson. The two stared one another down (far more literally in Tirek’s case) while the referee reluctantly called for the bell.

Tirek swung a massive, tree trunk-like arms at Spike, which he quickly ducked under. As soon as Tirek turned around, the self-proclaimed Future of the EWF began laying into Tirek’s midsection. The giant barely seemed to notice, looking down at the considerably smaller Spike as if he was a child throwing a temper-tantrum. After about thirty seconds of enduring pointlessly being pummeled, Tirek grabbed Spike by the throat, lifted him up and slammed him onto his back.

“Good lord…” said Celestia with a horrified sort of awe. “He just about slammed Spike Emerald through the mat…”

“We didn’t even really have time to commentate…” Discord’s voice had a layer of amusement on top of the horror and awe. “That’s the end of that one. All Tirek has to do is pin him and… Wait… He’s… He’s getting up?”

Sure enough, Spike was, somehow, working his way back to his feet. He sluggishly stood up, his fists raised to fight. Tirek seemed incapable of believing it, resting his hand on Spike’s shoulder. Spike nodded, as if begging for Tirek to give him his best shot.

Tirek then proceeded to lift Spike above his head like a toy and slam him with all of his might onto the canvas. Tirek dropped down to the lifeless, unmoving body of Spike for the pin.

One! Two! Three!

Tirek snarled as he stood up, unsatisfied by the match. He barely heard the announcer call for his victory, instead deciding to grab Spike by the hair and drag him to his feet. He lifted him by the throat, hoisted him up, and slammed him yet again.

“This is hard to watch,” said Celestia, unable to tear her eyes away from the massacre that was occurring in the ring.

Tirek lifted Spike again, hand around throat, when he noticed a silent Big Mac jumping onto the apron. Tirek stood there, staring down the equally massive Big Mac. The two giants had a staredown, Mac’s face like stone.

“Drop him,” he ordered. Tirek tilted his head, a devious smirk on his face. He hoisted Spike up and chokeslammed him onto the mat, dropping Spike for the fourth time that night. Before Tirek knew it, Big Mac was in the ring, standing toe-to-toe with Tirek Crimson.

“A standoff for the ages,” breathed Celestia. “Two titans in a staredown that could cause the very earth itself to quake.”

Mac grabbed Spike by his trunks, pulling him to his feet and tossing him over his shoulder. He never took his eyes off of Tirek as he carried Spike out of the ring. Tirek snarled as his first real competition walked calmly out of the arena with his battered, broken friend in tow.

The peppy accordion of Pinkie’s polka theme rang throughout the arena, sending the crowd into a frenzy. The Outrageous One leapt into view, clutching her golden briefcase with her. She slid the Ultimate Opportunity down the ramp then cartwheeled after it. She scooped it up, then slid into the ring to ravenous, raucous “Pinkie Pie” chants. She raised the Ultimate Opportunity briefcase over her head, basking in the glow from her very vocal supporters. She handed the briefcase over to the referee, her biggest grin planted firmly on her face.

A regal piano theme rose throughout the arena, the majesty and elegance of the theme lost in the sea of all-encompassing boos. Trixie Lulamoon stepped into view, decked out in her shimmering silver ring gear for the first time in years. She wore a sparkly, star-spangled cape and hat in addition to her in-ring gear. She paused in the middle of the ramp, looking around at the crowd that oh-so detested her. She took in a deep breath, then twirled so that her cape billowed out behind her and dropped to one knee, one hand in front of her her face. The veteran fans of the EWF appreciated seeing Trixie’s classic entrance, even if they weren’t too fond of The Showstopper today.

Trixie clambered up the apron, staring across the ring at her opponent, who was leaned against the turnbuckle in waiting. Trixie removed her hat and cape, resting them both on the ring post, then stepped into the ring.

“The Ultimate Opportunity has been redeemed, and so… The following contest is scheduled for one-fall, and it is for the EWF World Championship! Introducing first, the challenger! From Rockville, weighing in at 266 pounds, the Outrageous PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!”

Pinkie rose from the corner to a cascading cheer from the crowd, a determined grin on her face. Trixie showed no emotion, almost looking past the Ultimate Opportunist, as if she wasn’t even there.

“And her opponent! From Whinnyapolis, weighing in at 156 pounds, she is the current EWF World Champion, The Showstopper TRIXIE LULAMOON!”

Trixie turned sharply and leapt onto the middle rope, her fist raised high above her head. She returned to find Pinkie waiting for her in the middle of the ring, offering her hand. To the surprise of everyone in the arena, Pinkie included, Trixie accepted the handshake. The two backed away, then strafed one another as the bell rang to begin the first defense of the EWF World Championship in nearly a decade.

“And we’re off!” said Celestia. “Trixie Lulamoon, The Showstopper versus Pinkamena Pie, the Ultimate Opportunist! Never before has this match been seen, this is truly a one in a lifetime face off!”

Pinkie was the first to act, grabbing Trixie in a tie up. Never really the sort to bother with rest holds, she immediately bent Trixie over at the waist and slipped her head between her legs. Trixie dropped to the mat and rolled out of the ring, making a time-out gesture with her hands. Pinkie politely backed away, leaning against the nearby turnbuckle with a grin.

“Pinkamena going for the early win here, but the veteran Trixie slipping out of Pie’s arms like a greased pig,” said Celestia. “If I’m being honest, I worry for the champion’s odds in this match.

“Ten years is a hell of a long time to develop ring rust,” admitted Discord. “But Trixie Lulamoon didn’t get to become the greatest EWF champion in history just to let a bit of ring rust unseat her.”

Trixie slowly returned to the ring, holding her arm out to keep Pinkie back. She nodded to the referee when he asked if she could continue, then met with Pinkie a second time. Trixie got the upper hand this time, sliding under Pinkie’s arm and transitioning into a rear waistlock. Pinkie pushed backwards, sending Trixie towards the ropes. She slid out of the ring again, clutching her chest breathlessly. Pinkie sat on the middle rope, creating a space for Trixie to return through, and beckoned for the champion to enter. Trixie went around the other side to enter the squared circle, her frustration visibly growing.

“Trixie is going to have to get her head in the game if she wants to keep that belt,” noted Celestia. “Pinkie clearly is in the zone here.”

Pinkie ran forward, missing Trixie with a clothesline. She turned around and caught the incoming kick from The Showstopper. With one hand, Pinkie shoved Trixie to the ground, at which point she rolled out of the ring for a third time.

“Come on!” shouted Pinkie, her arms outstretched. Trixie clutched her neck, a strange smile growing on her face. She slowly raised her hand and, making sure she was locking eyes with Pinkie, snapped her fingers. The crowd saw it. The commentators saw it. Trixie saw it. But, her back turned, Pinkie did not.

Ember Torch and Starlight Glimmer leapt from the crowd, rushing into the ring and immediately raining down blows onto the challenger. They dropped Pinkie to the mat, stomping on any bit of the Ultimate Opportunist that they could get their boots on. The referee called for the bell, but could do nothing to stop the savage onslaught. Trixie made her way to the timekeeper, swiped up a microphone, and sarcastically began applauding.

“Ladies and gentlemen, the winner by disqualification, Pinkamena Diane Pie!” laughed Trixie. “However… Still the EWF World Champion, The Showstopper, Trixie Lulamoon!”

The crowd filled the arena with deafening boos as Trixie made her way into the ring, where Starlight and Ember continued to beat down a defenseless Pinkie. They dragged Pinkie to her feet, with Starlight bending her over at the waist, slipped an arm over her back and grabbed it her own hand from beneath Pinkie’s middle. Trixie pointed up, and Starlight hoisted Pinkie vertically. At the order of a downward flourish from Trixie, Starlight dropped straight down, slamming Pinkie directly onto her head.

“This is what happens! This is why you never go against Trixie,” said the champion. “Raise her up!” Ember and Starlight did as they were told, dragging the unmoving body of Pinkie Pie from the ground and hoisting her over their shoulders. Trixie dropped the mic to, then dropped to a bended knee. Starlight and Ember lifted Pinkie then dropped her face directly onto Trixie’s knee.

“Now that we’ve got that taken care of,” said Trixie, accepting the mic back from Starlight. “It’s time that Trixie explains something to one Twilight Sparkle.” The crowd took that as their opportunity to begin chanting Twilight’s name, which did nothing but annoy Trixie. “If you want to chant for her, then fine, but she’s a loser! Just like all of you! Losers, losers, all of you!” Trixie had to wait nearly a full minute for the boos to die down completely. “Twilight Sparkle, you’ve been trying and trying to get this championship from me, and you’ve done nothing but fail! You can send your best, but I will always emerge victorious, because I am, always was, and always will be smarter, stronger, faster, better than you! So you can send in your warriors, your chosen soldiers, your superstars, but they will fall, crushed under the boot of my kingdom! My Sovereignty!”

Ember snatched Trixie’s title from the approaching timekeeper and strapped it around the champion’s waist. Trixie’s goons, her Sovereignty, dropped to bended knee beside their mistress, who rested a hand on each of their shoulders while medical staff rushed to Pinkie’s aid.

“This is absolutely despicable!” roared Celestia. “A familiar sight: Trixie Lulamoon cheating to retain her championship! This is a repeat of when she screwed Twilight Sparkle all those years ago at Summer Sun Celebration!”

“Look, you may disagree with Trixie’s methods, but they are effective,” said Discord. “The match ended in a disqualification, ergo, Champion’s Advantage allows for Trixie to retain her title. That’s all there is to it.”

“And, unfortunately, that’s all the time we have tonight. We’ll have to wait until Friday for Twilight Sparkle’s response to this controversy. But, until then, EWF Universe, this has been Celestia Regal and Discord Redrum. See you next time.”

“Good night!”

Friday Night Ascension III

Pinkie Pie was almost never seen without her patented, million dollar smile. She carried herself with a bubbly demeanor that one wouldn’t ordinarily expect from someone whose job required her to be punched in the face on a weekly basis. Somehow, despite the bruises and the beatings, The Outrageous One always seemed to have a smile and a bright, cheery demeanor.

Pinkie had none of this as she knocked on the door to the General Manager’s office.

“Come in.”

Pinkie pushed open the door and stepped into Twilight’s office, taking a seat across from her desk.

“Hello, Pinkie.” Twilight looked as if she hadn’t slept in days. “What can I do for you?”

“First of all, I just wanted to apologize. I let you down,” sighed Pinkie. “I should’ve put her away super easy, but I didn’t take it as seriously as I should have, and I ruined the opportunity you gave me, and now Trixie’s still—”

“Let me stop you right there, Pinkie,” said Twilight. “You didn’t ruin anything. There’s no way you could’ve known about Torch and Glimmer. Furthermore, I commend you for giving Trixie a fair chance to get ready and face you on an even playing field.”

“But Trixie’s going to keep the championship forever now!”

“Actually, I’m working on a solution right now. I’ll have to make some calls, send some letters, but… Well, I’ll save that for when all the pieces are in place. Currently, I’ve got a pay-per-view to get in order.” Twilight straightened a stack of papers on her desk and grabbed up her pen. “Hard to believe that DisHarmony is this Sunday already. In any case, is there anything you actually needed? Because, if not, I’ve got to get back to work.”

“Actually, yes. There is something I need. I want Starlight.”

“Sorry, Pinkie. You’re back of the line as far as title shots go right now. I can pencil you in to face off with Applebloom to move up in the rankings, but…”

“Not for the title. I want payback for these last few weeks. Give me Ember, too,” said Pinkie, her fists clenched in a rare display of anger. “Those two have been rustling my jimmies and I want to give them what they deserve.”

“I can’t give you them both. It wouldn’t be fair to you, and you could get hurt.” Twilight hummed in thought. “However… If you were to get yourself a tag team partner…”

Pinkie broke her nasty streak with a determined, confident smirk. She stood up and turned for the door.

“Consider it done.”

“Welcome all, to Friday Night Ascension!” said Discord. “The least terrible part of your Friday nights! I’m Discord Redrum, joined, as always, by my broadcasting partner, Celestia Regal!”

“We’ve got a wonderful night for you, ladies and gentlemen,” said Celestia. “Starting first with a message from the Intercontinental Champion!”

There’s a Nightmare inside!

Luna Regal leapt onto the scene to the thunderous applause of the arena. The Intercontinental champion made her way down the ramp, then rolled into the ring. She clutched her championship like a child, accepting the microphone from the announcer.

“Greetings, ladies and gentlemen!” said Luna. “I believe it is about time I’ve addressed you all. A few weeks ago, I won my first ever Intercontinental Championship, by making Rarity Valentine tap out clean in the middle of the ring!” The crowd erupted into another bout of cheers, which made Luna grin widely. “But, I could not have done it alone. So, perhaps it would be more accurate to say that we won. We are the Intercontinental Champions! And We dropped Rarity Valentine a second time, putting her into an endless sleep with the Eternal Night!

“And, now that Valentine is out of Our way… We require tougher competition. We desire a challenger! So, We have a proposition for anyone in the locker room. Meet here, right now, and, if you can somehow conquer The Nightmare, you will earn yourself a title opportunity in two days, at the DisHarmony pay-per-view. Consider this a #1 Contender’s Open Challenge!”

Luna beckoned for her opponent, her eyes filled with a ravenous hunger. The entire arena waited with bated breath, anticipating an impromptu match involving one of the greatest wrestlers to hold the IC title.

A harmonic, operatic humming floated throughout the arena, sending chills down spines. The harmony shifted into hard-hitting electric guitar, and crashing drums that rattled the bones of all in the arena.

There's no holding me back...

I'm not driven by fear, I'm just driven by anger...

The crowd descended into boos as the challenger made her presence known. Aria Blaze strolled into view, her Tag Team championship sitting on her shoulder. She clutched a microphone as she approached the ring, wearing a scowl and carrying with her an air of determination.

“I can see you looking lost there, champ, so let me break down what’s gonna happen,” said Aria. “I’m gonna walk down this ramp, slide into that ring, and set my tag team championship down. Then, I’m going to kick your ass all up and down this arena.” The crowd roared with disapproval, which annoyed Aria to no end. “Then, I’m gonna straightjacket suplex you through the goddamn mat. Then, I’m going to cover you. Then, the ref is gonna count to three. Then, in our next match, I’m going to put your leg into an ankle lock. Then, you’re gonna tap out. Then, I’m gonna take that Intercontinental Championship, strap it around my waist, and walk out of the arena as the first ever EWF double-champion!”

Luna chuckled, pacing around the ring with a devious grin. She laid her belt down onto the mat, beckoning for Aria to enter her domain.

“You run your mouth, Blaze. You talk and talk and talk,” laughed Luna. “But that’s all you can do. You hide behind your team, because you don’t have the talent to do it on your own. You need a team behind you, because you’re just not good enough! You’re a mouse in a land of lions!” Luna dropped to one knee, patting her title with a grin. “But, I did say anyone backstage, so… Bring it, Blaze. If you think you can step into the ring with me and emerge with your body intact, I invite you to try!”

Luna leapt forward and landed on the middle rope, swiping wildly at Aria with a mad, crazed look in her eyes. Aria rose to the challenge, sliding into the ring and standing toe-to-toe with the Intercontinental Champion. The referee took their championship belts and handed it to the timekeeper, then, after keeping the two combatants apart to ensure the match could begin fairly, called for the bell.

Immediately, Aria wrapped her arms around Luna’s middle and hoisted her up, flinging her backward over her head. They both hit the ground at the same time, with Aria reaching her feet slightly before Luna. Aria grabbed her again, this time hoisting her up and slamming her forward, before dropping onto the IC champion for a quick pin.

One!

Luna powered out, quickly scurrying to her feet. She wore a grin as she cracked her back, raising her fists up to fight.

“Off to a lightning-fast start here,” said Celestia. “Blaze getting a one-count after that pair of belly-to-belly suplexes, one of which was overhead, starting off quite strong in this match.”

“Of course she is! Aria Blaze is a wrestling machine!” said Discord. “She’s smart enough to know that you’ve got to keep the pressure on Luna if you want a chance at beating her!”

Luna grinned as she approached Aria, her fists raised to her face. Aria rushed in, ducking under Luna’s incoming right hook, and wrapped her arms around Luna’s middle. She hoisted the Intercontinental Champion up, attempting a third belly-to-belly suplex. Luna managed to countered with a firm elbow to the face, then a belly-to-belly of her own once her feet hit the ground. Luna dropped to a full mount, raining down rights and lefts onto her opponent. Aria shoved her off, rolling under the bottom rope and to the ground outside.

“Regal with a series of strikes, and Aria, very intelligently, might I add, slipping out for a breather,” said Discord. “Blaze knows better than to enter into a boxing match with Luna Regal, so she’s biding her time, waiting for an opening to slip in and grapple with the champion.”

“An area in which Aria would certainly have the advantage,” admitted Celestia. “Luna is a striker above all else, and a technical grappler like Aria would cause her serious problems.”

Aria shooed Luna away, waiting until the Intercontinental champion was on the other side of the ring before sliding into the ring. Luna eyed her opponent down, then offered her hand for Aria to shake. Aria slowly neared, but accepted the handshake. She pulled Luna closer, then, to the outrage of just about everyone in the arena, she spat across Luna’s face.

“Ooh… That was a mistake,” said Celestia with a wince. “I can’t see this going well for Aria. Luna’s always had a bit of a temper, and that display of blatant disrespect is sure to stoke her flames, so to speak.”

Luna wiped the saliva from her face, looking down at her hand as if to ensure that she properly understood what had just transpired. She chuckled to herself, then immediately headbutted Aria as hard as she could, dropping the tag team champion to the ground. As soon as Aria hit the mat, Luna began laying in, stomping mercilessly on her chest, furiously shouting like a caged animal. She backed up, rebounded off of the ropes, and dropped a leg on Aria’s throat. She stood up and repeated the process a second, third, fourth time. She went for a fifth when Aria rolled out of the way, causing Luna to drop down to the mat on her butt.

Aria hurried to her feet, ran forward and leapt, catching Luna with a leg lariat that left her flat on her back. Aria was far from finished, however, and she immediately grabbed Luna’s right arm and dropped to the mat. She scissored the arm with her legs and wrenched it, clutching the wrist and hyperextending the limb as much as she could.

“And the Siren Submission Specialist changes the complexion of the match in an instant!” said Discord. “She’s got that cross armbreaker in nice and clean, and on the dominant hand! That just goes to show the ring-smarts of Aria Blaze!”

“She analyzed Luna’s greatest asset and found a way to neutralize it,” said Celestia. “Luna might be the best striker alive, but, with one arm, her chances against possibly the best grappler alive are a bit on the low side.”

Luna began to panic, feeling the pain in her arm blister to an almost unbearable degree. She clawed at Aria’s fingers, desperately trying to break the hold of the so-called Siren Submission Specialist. Aria’s submission was simply too solid, and Luna realized that she wouldn’t be breaking the hold like that. Instead, she used her considerable athleticism and pushed herself up, tilting Aria over in an impromptu roll-up.

One! Two!

Aria raised her left shoulder from the mat, the grip on her hold loosening. Instead of fighting the losing battle of holding the cross armbreaker, Aria decided to transition to a different hold. She shifted her legs, scissoring Luna’s throat between the shin of her right leg and the calf of the left.

“See, this is exactly why I believe Aria Blaze to be one of the greatest professional wrestlers alive!” cheered Discord. “To transition from a cross armbreaker to that modified triangle choke/gogoplata, her Bermuda Triangle hold, all the while keeping your shoulder off of the mat! It’s incredible!”

Luna flailed in the hold, reaching wildly for the ropes in a desperate attempt to break the submission. Aria wouldn’t allow it, and she anchored herself down as best she could to prevent Luna from moving even an inch. Just as it seemed the pain would grow too much for the Intercontinental Champion, Luna grabbed Aria by the throat. Using what may have been the last of her strength, she raised Aria up and slammed her down onto her back, breaking the hold. Both competitors lay flat on their back, unable to move.

“Dear lord, the impact of that slam!” exclaimed Celestia. “Luna, summoning the last of her strength to just about break Aria Blaze in half!”

“But the champ seems down for the count,” noted Discord. “Whoever gets to their feet first will have a distinct advantage. If Aria can just come to, she could very well be on her way to an Intercontinental Title match in two short days!”

Unfortunately for Discord, it was Luna who rose to her feet first, stumbling into the ropes for support. She steadied herself, then grabbed a fistful of Aria’s hair, dragging her to her feet. Luna delivered a stiff boot to Aria’s gut, bending the tag champ over at the waist. She reversed herself, and pressed Aria’s head to her own back. She hooked their arms together, twisted, and hoisted the Siren Submission Specialist into the air, suspending her upside-down.

“Luna going for the Eternal Night!” called Celestia. “If she hits that move, it’s all over for Aria Blaze!”

Aria wiggled free, flipping backwards and landing on her feet. Quicker than Luna could even blink, Aria grabbed Luna’s wrists, crossed her arms near the waist, and threw her back into a picture-perfect suplex.

“The straightjacket german suplex!” said Discord, clapping wildly. “That suplex was a work of art! Simply beautiful form!”

Aria pushed Luna onto her back, then dropped down for the cover.

One! Two! Three!

Aria raised her hand triumphantly, jumping to her feet. She wore a very satisfied smirk as she snatched her title from the approaching timekeeper. She fell backward, leaning on the ropes for support as the crowd simply rained boos down onto her. This time, she didn’t let it bother her. She just kept her eyes on the Intercontinental Championship as the timekeeper laid it onto Luna’s forlorn body.

“The winner, ARIA BLAZE!”

Aria smirked with satisfaction as she stood supreme over The Nightmare, who still hadn’t moved. Aria grabbed the Intercontinental Championship and raised it high above her head, basking in the hate from the thousands of fans in the audience. She looked down at Luna, then, for the second time, spat across her face. Aria dropped the IC title onto the champion then rolled out of the ring, her fist raised high in victory as she returned to the locker room.

Aria stepped into the locker room, prepared for the incoming argument. Just as she expected, her two partners were waiting for her, Adagio looking especially angry. Aria chuckled, unable to help herself.

“What do you think you're doing, Blaze?” demanded Adagio. “Going after a singles match. The IC champion, no less!”

“What I'm doing is kicking ass,” said Aria. She took a seat, then snatched Sonata’s water bottle from her hand and took a swig. “I don't see the big deal.”

“We're a team, you dunce! The Dazzlings move together or not at all!”

“I had my singles match against Pinkie. It's only fair that Aria gets one,” said Sonata. Aria flicked her partner on the forehead, tossing her the bottle back.

“I don't need you to defend me, airhead.” Aria seemed to think for a moment. “But thanks. What's the difference between her match and mine? Besides the fact that I won?”

“The difference, you moron, is that Sonata’s match didn’t insert herself into the title picture!” hissed Adagio. She took in a calming breath before continuing. “Look, I ordinarily wouldn't especially care, but these are extenuating circumstances.”

Ordinarily, Aria would blow Adagio off and go home, to prepare for her imminent title match. But something about the way that Adagio spoke that stopped Aria in her tracks. Her voice was a different sort of annoyed. As if her grievances had some substance to them.

“Extenuating how?” asked Aria slowly.

“She wants the Dazzlings,” said Adagio.

“Who's ‘she’?”

“You know who ‘she’ is. And she says that you can't win the Intercontinental Championship,” explained Adagio. “She says Torch is next in line. But Lulamoon wants The Dazzlings, and I said we're with her.”

“Are you out of your mind? I'm not throwing away a shot at the title because you made a deal with some washed up has-been,” snarled Aria. Instead of losing her patience with her partner, Adagio opted for sheer logic and common sense. Even Aria wasn't stubborn enough to ignore the simple facts.

“Consider the following. Trixie Lulamoon runs Magic. We anger Trixie, who decides that, maybe, it's been too long since we've defended our tag-team championships.”

“We'll win,” said Aria simply.

“And what about the next Monday? And the week after? And the week after?” Adagio tapped her forehead, urging Aria to think. “We're good, that's true, but nobody is good enough to retain every Monday for the rest of their careers. So we do as we're told, we wait. Give it time, and she promised that you'll see your chance at the gold. But, for now…”

“You want me to lie down for Regal? What are you on?! After what she said to me, I'm tapping that bitch out on Sunday,” snarled Aria.

“All I said is that you have to lose,” said Adagio, with a sinister, dastardly grin. “I never said you couldn't win a little, too.”

The cold, mechanical electronic beats of Scootaloo’s theme vibed throughout the arena as the scrappy, bat-wielding bruiser made her way to the ring. She kept her eyes peeled for any sneak attacks from her dastardly, devious rival. She slid into the ring, swaying her steel baseball bat idly.

“The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Cloudsdale, weighing in at 130 pounds, SCOOTALOO!”

Scootaloo clutched her bat as she paced the ring, hoping to finally get her hands on Diamond Tiara. Attacking Sweetie Belle was the absolutely most despicable thing Diamond could’ve done, in Scootaloo’s eyes. Scootaloo and Sweetie weren’t especially close friends, but they had crossed paths quite a few times on the independent circuit. Sweetie was a fighter, one of the speediest and cleverest in her division back in CEW. For that, she had earned Scootaloo’s respect, and it would be a cold day in hell before Scootaloo let that snobby, self-obsessed brat Diamond Tiara hurt her.

“And, her opponent, from Ponyville, weighing in at 135 pounds, who would like to be announced as The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling, DIAMOND TIARA!”

The arena went silent. Not a single note of Diamond’s entrance theme was heard, nor was the Crown Jewel of the EWF seen.

“Er… Diamond Tiara was scheduled to face off with Scootaloo,” said Celestia. “However, Ms. Tiara is nowhere to be found. How curious…”

“There’s nothing curious about it! This is clearly the work of Scootaloo!” exclaimed Discord, with an impossible amount of certainty. “She’s kidnapped The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling! Somebody, send for a search party!”

“I doubt Scootaloo would resort to kidnapping just to win a match.” Celestia rolled her eyes at her broadcasting partner. “Especially given how eager she’s been to finally get a fair match with Diamond.”

“Then where in the world is Diamond Tiara?!”

That question weighed on everyone’s mind, none more so than Scootaloo. She paced the ring impatiently, lamenting her lack of an opponent as the referee began his obligatory ten-count. To Scootaloo’s dismay, Diamond never made herself seen, even as the referee reached ten and called for the bell.

“The winner, by countout, SCOOTALOO!”

Scootaloo stomped her foot angrily, yanking her arm away from the referee who tried to raise it. She furiously rolled out of the ring and stomped her way up the ramp.

“Call the authorities! The police, the FBI, INTERPOL, anyone!” exclaimed Discord. “Put your best men on the case! Diamond Tiara is missing, and I will not rest until she's found!”

“And, while we're getting that together,” sighed Celestia, rolling her eyes. “It's time for some tag-team action, AJ and Sunset versus the unlikely team of Lyra Heartstrings and Bon-Bon! That's next, on Friday Night Ascension!”

Scootaloo burst into the General Manager’s office without bothering to knock. Twilight barely seemed to notice her new guest, her eyes glued on the stack of papers before her. Scootaloo made her way to the desk, slapping her hands firmly on the desk.

“Where is she?” demanded Scootaloo.

“I don't know, Scootaloo,” sighed Twilight. “But, I assure you, she will be reprimanded for her actions.”

“You talk about reprimanding, but she's been running wild and getting off free. When does ‘reprimanding’ become ‘suspending’ or ‘kicking her ass’?”

“I can't book a match if she doesn't come to work.” Twilight grabbed her cane and stood up, clutching her head. “And, when she does decide to come to work, she will be penalized, assuming she even has a job. So go home and celebrate your first win over Diamond Tiara. I'm afraid I don't have anything for you this Sunday, so I'll see you on Friday. Now, if you excuse me, I need some coffee.”

“If I see her again, I'm breaking my bat over her head,” snarled Scootaloo. “You better make sure you find her before I do, because I'm putting that bitch on a stretcher for what she did to me.”

Scootaloo turned for the door, walking directly into a clubbing forearm from a suddenly appearing Diamond Tiara. The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling dropped down onto Scootaloo, wailing her with lefts and rights. Twilight grabbed Diamond around the waist and pulled her off, putting her as far away from Scootaloo as possible.

“Enough!” shouted Twilight. “Tiara, that's enough!”

“Who the hell do you think you are?!” spat Diamond, swiping at Scootaloo. “You think you can attack me and get away with it?!”

“Screw you, bitch!” Scootaloo fought to her feet, wiping a thin trickle of blood from her nose. “You coward! Can't beat me without a cheap shot, huh?!”

“Don't make things worse!”

Scootaloo leapt over Twilight, bringing Diamond to the ground and exploded with furious right hands. Twilight hit the ground badly, with her bad knee hitting the corner of the desk. She let out a howl of pain, then immediately pushed herself to her feet. She grabbed Scootaloo around the throat with the hook of her cane and dragged her off, tossing her to the ground. As Diamond attempted to pick up where she left off, Twilight whacked her in the middle with her cane. She shoved Diamond onto her butt, pressing the bottom of her cane against Diamond’s chest.

“You will not fight in my office!” roared Twilight. “Sit down! I tried to be nice about this, but you’ve forced my hand! You really want each other that damn badly?!” Twilight huffed angrily, simply oozing intimidation. Even the blood rivals didn't dare to move when The Magician ordered them not to. “Fine! So be it! This Sunday, at DisHarmony, it'll be Diamond Tiara versus Scootaloo in a Three Stages of Hell Match! That’s best two out of three falls, each match being of a different nature. The first match will be a standard wrestling match. That's to decide which of you is the better wrestler. The second match will be held under extreme rules, so anything goes! That's for you two to beat the hell out of each other so you can finally get it out of your system! And, the third match, should it come to that, will be a Last Man Standing match!”

“What's that one for?” asked Diamond scathingly. Twilight glared at her for several moments, then threateningly pointed her cane at Diamond Tiara’s throat. This effectively shut up the Crown Jewel of the EWF.

“That's to make sure at least one of you doesn't come back to work on Monday,” snarled the GM. “And let me make this perfectly clear. You two are going to get in your cars and drive home. You're going to come in on Sunday, and you are going to keep the violence within the confines of an official match. There will be no pre-match ambushes or post-match beatdowns. When the bell sounds to end the match, you roll out of the ring and go the hell home! Failure to adhere to all of these rules will result in your immediate termination!”

“Who the hell do you think you are?!” demanded Diamond. “You can't talk to me like that! I'm a wrestling princess, damn it, you won't threaten to fire me and get away with it! My father will—”

“Your father won't be able to help you once you've been blacklisted from the professional wrestling world!” barked Twilight. “Your father might have some influence, but who do you think helped him get it?! Any pull that Filthy Rich has, I can overrule it with a phone call! I swear to you, Tiara, if you cross me… You will never work in this industry again! You'll be flipping burgers by Saturday! Am I understood?”

Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo stared each other down, wishing to get their hands on each other. Unfortunately, a very angry GM had made it very clear that they would do well to wait a few days. So, begrudgingly, the two feuding rivals nodded.

“Good. Now, if you excuse me, I've got a World Title picture to clean up...”

“The General Manager let her temper get the best of her, and she’s taking it out on Diamond Tiara!” complained Discord. “It’s all horribly unfair!”

“What did you expect? She’s been tossing rocks at the proverbial hornet’s nest for weeks!” exclaimed Celestia. “Anyone who’s been a fan of Twilight Sparkle back in her heyday should know that the absolute worst thing you can do is annoy The Magician. She may very well make you disappear.”

Yee-haw!

Sunset Shimmer and AJ burst onto the scene to massive applause. AJ scooped Sunset up, propping her up on her shoulder. The Demon cupped her hands around her mouth and shouted as loudly as she could.

“Hell yeah!”

The crowd shouted right back at her, causing the duo to grin. Sunset jumped down from her partner and the two ran into the ring. AJ put her palms up and Sunset immediately started laying in to prepare herself for the coming match.

“The following contest is a tag team match, scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, at a combined weight of 355 pounds, AJ AND SUNSET SHIMMER!”

Bright, cheery pop filled the room, bringing with it Bon-Bon and her bowl of candies. She tossed sweets into the crowd as usual. She slid into the ring, offering the bowl to her opponents. With a shrug, they each took one and popped it in their mouths, thanking Bon-Bon for the unorthodox display of sportsmanship. Their greeting was interrupted by Lyra’s classic, harmonious harp. She joined them in the ring, standing begrudgingly next to her partner. Lyra reached for a candy, just to have her hand slapped away by Bon-Bon, who proceeded to toss the last of them into the crowd and slide the bowl out of the ring.

“And their opponents, at a combined weight of 345 pounds, the team of BON-BON AND LYRA HEARTSTRINGS!”

Sunset made her way to the corner, meaning the large southern brawler Applejack would be starting the match. Lyra laughed, playfully slapped Bon-Bon on the back, and stepped out of the ring and to the apron. Bon-Bon rolled her eyes, but snapped back to focus when it came time to strafe her opponent. The two touched gloves, and, as the referee called for the bell, the match began.

“And we’re off,” said Celestia. “Bon-Bon and Applejack starting us off here, and Bon-Bon is going to have to use her speed and agility if she has any hopes of beating Applejack.”

“At 6’4, 200 pounds, AJ definitely has the power advantage,” agreed Discord. “Bon-Bon is going to have to do some in-ring black magic if she’s going to scrape out a win here.”

Bon-Bon dove forward in an attempt to take out Applejack’s legs, but had no such luck. Applejack brought up her knee and drove it into Bon-Bon’s jaw. Bon-Bon snapped up, then caught a firm right hand. Applejack hoisted her up, light as a feather, then dropped her down onto the mat.

“And Applejack, firmly in the driver’s seat so far,” said Discord. “Despite the friendly start to this match up, AJ clearly has no reservations with denting up her new candy factory.”

Bon-Bon scurried to her feet, her strategy much the same as before. Instead of a takedown, this time she went for a sweeping kick. AJ checked the kick, then countered with one of her own. She caught Bon-Bon in the hip, then launched a lightning-quick jab to Bon-Bon’s jaw. AJ grabbed her opponent by the neck and tossed her clean across the ring, landing her cleanly in the corner, where Sunset waited for her. Applejack tagged in her partner, who quickly slid into the ring, leapt into the air, and delivered a swift kick the Bon-Bon’s head, dropping her to the ground.

“Beautiful enzuigiri by Shimmer,” called Celestia. “And the cover.” Bon-Bon brought her shoulder from the mat as quickly as possible. “And a kickout at one and a half.”

Sunset pulled Bon-Bon to her feet and gave her a swift kick to the thigh, causing her to wince in pain. Bon-Bon finally found her opening and brought Sunset to the ground with a ferocious lariat. Bon-Bon hurried to her corner, where Lyra was waiting for her. As Bon-Bon went for the tag, Lyra moved her hand away with a smirk. Bon-Bon glared at her, at which point Lyra offered her hand for the tag yet again. Just like before, Lyra moved her hand away before her partner could make the tag.

Bon-Bon glanced back at Sunset, who was tagging in her own partner, then returned her eyes to Lyra. She slapped Lyra across the face as hard as she could and rolled out of the ring.

“Oh dear,” said Celestia. “Although a bit aggressive, that is technically an official tag. Heartstrings is now the legal man in the match.”

Lyra massaged her cheek as she slowly made her way into the ring. Applejack uncomfortably watched the little domestic dispute that was unfolding before her and, in her preoccupation, she left her guard down long enough for Lyra connect with a shocking dropkick to the chest. As soon as AJ hit the mat, Lyra began stomping on her ankle, keeping her grounded for as long as she could.

“Lyra with those heinous stomps to the leg, no doubt to negate Applejack’s distinct size advantage,” said Discord. “All the height, weight, and strength in the world doesn’t matter worth a damn if you can’t get off of the mat.”

Lyra delivered one last brutal stomp before kicking AJ onto her stomach. Making sure to lock eyes with Bon-Bon while she did so, Lyra trapped Applejack’s legs with her own, then reached forward and grabbed her opponent in a facelock.

“What’s this?! Lyra borrowing her partner’s submission move!” laughed Discord. “Bon-Bon can’t be too happy with that!”

Applejack thrashed in the hold, reaching for the bottom rope in order to break the hold. Lyra had positioned herself well in the ring, however, and AJ knew she could never reach. She dug deep inside herself and, using some unknown hidden strength, pushed herself to her knees, then her feet. Lyra held on, transitioning from the stolen Sweet Tooth into a sleeper hold. Her new submission wouldn’t last, because Applejack backed herself into Sunset’s corner, squishing Lyra between the turnbuckle and the 200-pounder. Sunset slapped AJ’s chest, tagging herself into the match. Her partner slid out of the ring, and The Demon delivered a series of quick, fierce European uppercuts. She tossed Lyra to the ground, scaled the turnbuckle, and gave a leaping backflip.

Lyra rolled out of the way, and Sunset caught nothing but mat. Now with some breathing room, Lyra crawled over for her corner and dove for Bon-Bon’s hand. Bon-Bon moved out of the way just before Lyra made it, smirking to herself. Lyra stood up, fire in her eyes, and backhanded Bon-Bon firmly before sliding out of the ring.

“Ooh, these two are going to be the death of each other,” said Celestia. “Need I remind you that Trixie Lulamoon, the General Manager of Monday Night Magic, made it very clear that she expected these two to put their differences aside. One can only speculate what might happen if this team doesn’t click, but you can rest assured that it will not be good for the two involved.”

Bon-Bon shouted at her partner, but managed to stay focused on the recovering Sunset Shimmer. She ran forward and dove into Sunset’s leg, bringing her down to her knees. Once there, Sunset was in a perfect position for Bon-Bon to swiftly kick her in the jaw, stunning The Demon. She then scooped Sunset to her feet, bending her over at the waist and slipping her head between her legs. Bon-Bon grabbed her around the middle and hoisted her up, sitting her on her shoulders, then raised Sunset high and slammed her back to the mat with a thunderous boom.

“Hands Down Powerbomb!” called Celestia. “Just like Lyra with that STF, Bon-Bon taking the opportunity to… Shall we say… Pay homage to her tag team partner.”

“Oh, don’t sugarcoat things, Regal, she’s trying to stick it to Lyra Heartstrings!” complained Discord. “She’s obviously jealous of Lyra’s natural supremacy and her abilities in the ring! Why else would she try to copy from her?”

“Perhaps the same reason that Lyra used the Sweet Tooth?”

“And let me stop you right there, Regal! Bon-Bon’s so-called Sweet Tooth is a standard STF! She has no claim to that move. The Hands Down Powerbomb, on the other hand, is a distinct, nuanced, modified variation of a classic powerbomb that not just any old jobber can pull off!”

Bon-Bon smirked at her partner, gesturing to Sunset’s forlorn body. She approached Lyra for the tag, apparently having gotten enough animosity out of her system to work with someone she despised. She reached in for the tag just to be punched square in the nose. Lyra leapt through the ropes and descended onto her partner, beating her silly with furious rights and lefts.

“No! You’re supposed to be her partner!” groaned Celestia. “Work together, for Christ’s sake! Your jobs may be in jeopardy!”

Even if Lyra could hear Celestia, she was unlikely to stop her onslaught. It took the referee to physically pull Lyra away to get the fists to stop flying and, when they did, Lyra simply rolled out of the ring and made her way up the ramp. Bon-Bon worked her way to an upright position, checking her nose for blood before nodding to the referee to resume the match. Since he couldn’t exactly disqualify Lyra for attacking her own teammate, and Bon-Bon insisted she could continue, he had no other choice but to allow the lopsided, unfair, handicapped matchup to continue.

Bon-Bon locked up with Sunset in the middle of the ring, immediately losing the advantage to The Demon. Sunset overpowered Bon-Bon and threw her into the corner where AJ stood, waiting for the tag. Sunset tagged her partner in, and dragged Bon-Bon into position in the middle of the ring. Applejack joined them, taking her place opposite of Sunset, with Bon-Bon standing punch-drunkenly in the middle. Applejack delivered a firm headbutt to Bon-Bon, which caused here to swing and sway directly into a superkick from Sunset, which laid her out onto her back. Without missing a beat, Applejack dropped a leg onto Bon-Bon’s throat while Sunset simultaneously leapt and backflipped in the air, landing on her middle with a crisp, picturesque standing shooting star press.

“Earth, Wind, and Fire!” called Celestia. “Applejack for the pin!”

Sunset rolled out of the ring while her partner dropped down and hooked Bon-Bon’s leg, pressing her shoulders to the mat.

One! Two! Three!

Applejack raised her fist as the bell rang, unable to properly enjoy her fairly hollow victory. Sunset joined the two in the ring and helped Bon-Bon to her feet to ensure that she was okay.

“The winners, AJ AND SUNSET SHIMMER!”

“Absolutely ridiculous! What sort of competitor turns their back on their partner like that?” demanded Celestia. “How petty, insecure, and self-absorbed can you really be!”

“Hey, now, Bon-Bon is just as bad, if not worse! Anything Lyra did, Bon-Bon matched it and, in some cases, trumped it,” Discord seethed. “If you’re going to toss around blame for that match falling apart, be sure to give everyone their dues.”

“Look, I never said that Bon-Bon was a perfect teammate there, but she was willing to put aside her differences with Lyra for the sake of the match! It seems that, with temperaments such as those, conflict would be a foregone conclusion,” sighed Celestia. “Let’s hope Pinkamena Pie has better luck with her partner this Sunday at the DisHarmony pay-per-view, where she and her mystery partner will take on Ember Torch and Starlight Glimmer: The Sovereignty in the main event!”

“Also taking place is an Intercontinental Championship match between The Siren Submission Specialist Aria Blaze and the current champ, The Nightmare, Luna Regal,” added Discord. “As well as a simply hellacious Three Stages of Hell Match between Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo. All of this, and more, this Sunday at DisHarmony! Until then, I’ve been Discord Redrum and Celestia Regal, wishing you a good night!”

EWF DisHarmony

The arena erupted into cheers as the pyrotechnics began, bringing with it the flashes and explosions that signified the start of the event. The excitement in the air was palpable, downright infectious. This was the epitome of pro-wrestling. It was what fans of the sport lived for.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to EWF DisHarmony!” said Celestia. “I’m Celestia Regal, joined by Discord Redrum, and we've got an explosive card ready for tonight!”

“Nothing but blood feuds here, tonight,” agreed Discord. “Starting with Spike Emerald attempting to get his revenge on the massive, unstoppable, Hulking Mass of Destruction, Tirek Crimson!”

A cannon sounded, bringing with it the ground-shaking stomps of the giant that was Tirek Crimson. He stepped into the ring to thunderous boos. Tirek didn't care in the slightest. The only thing he was concerned with was squashing this persistent pest that had been getting under his skin.

“The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Tartarus, weighing in at 392 pounds, TIREK CRIMSON!”

Tirek raised his fists and let out a massive roar, shaking the very foundation of the building. His posturing was cut short by the shriek of electric guitar. Spike jumped onto the scene, alone, clutching his mic and carrying with him an electric energy.

“What's up, EWF Universe! Y’all having a good night?” Spike raised his mic to catch all of the cheers from the crowd. “Well, your night’s about to get a whole lot better, because you're about to see Lil’ Red Riding Hood get gobbled up by the biggest, baddest wolf in Fableland! Crimson, you've been on top of the world for too damn long, and tonight, you're gonna hit the ground, hard! If I were you, I’d—”

“If I were you, I'd shut the hell up!” Tirek had, at some point, swiped a microphone from the announcer, magnifying his already-thunderous voice. “I've beaten you twice, and I'll do it a third time without even trying! So shut your mouth and step into the ring, so I can break you one more time!”

To the massive annoyance of Tirek, Spike began to laugh. He laughed all the way down to the ring, slid beneath the bottom rope, and stood toe-to-toe with Tirek.

“You're not all that bright, are you?” chuckled Spike. “Haven't you noticed anything different about me and my entrance? I never announced myself. Wanna take a guess why?”

Spike’s music resumed, eliciting a huge pop from the crowd. Down the ramp came the only person in the EWF who could compare to the sheer size of Tirek Crimson.

“It's cause I'm not your opponent tonight,” said Spike. “No, no, no… Your opponent is making his way to the ring, standing at six feet, eleven inches tall. He's weighing in at 389 pounds. From the hot, arid city of Appleloosa, The Hard-Hitting, Slow-Talking, Jaw-Cracking, Skull-Smashing, Bona-fide Badass BIG MACINTOSH!”

Big Mac cracked his knuckles, then pulled himself to the apron and climbed over the top rope. Spike patted his buddy’s arm, then rolled out of the ring and stood at ringside. Mac stood just a few feet from Tirek, looking him in the eyes with a stony, stoic expression that was a far departure from the terrified looks Tirek was used to getting.

“Move over, David!” exclaimed Discord. “Tonight, we’ve got a Goliath versus Goliath throwdown on our hands!”

The bell rang, and Tirek barreled forward, smashing his shoulder into the massive Big Macintosh, failing to move him more than a few inches. Tirek looked incredulous, his shock melding into amusement. He grinned as he backed away, then attempted another running shoulder shoulder block. Just like before, Big Mac hardly budged. Tirek gave a deep, bellowing laugh when, suddenly, Mac placed a hand on Tirek’s chest. The crowd burst into roaring cheers as Mac shoved Tirek to the ground.

“Dear lord! I never thought I’d see the day that Tirek Crimson was manhandled like that!” exclaimed Celestia. “Dropped like a sack of stones!”

Tirek looked up as if he could not comprehend what had just occurred. He pushed himself to his feet, an amused smirk prominently displayed on his face. With a crack of the knuckles, Tirek was ready for his first real fight.

“Collar-elbow tie up in the center of the ring,” said Discord. “Unfortunately, ladies and gentlemen, we don’t have a whole lot of information for you tonight. This match is already longer than both of his bouts with Spike Emerald, combined.”

“But, even more mysterious than Tirek Crimson is his opponent,” noted Celestia. “This will be Big Mac’s first match in the EWF. We’ll just have to see if he has to skill to back up that massive stature of his.”

Mac took control of the hold, slipping into a side-headlock with his massive tree-trunk arms. Tirek struggled for a bit before pushing Mac away and freeing himself from the hold. His reprieve was rather short-lived, as Mac was back on him in an instant. For the second time, Mac did the impossible; He shoved Tirek to the ground as if he were a child.

“Tirek Crimson started this match with a grin, but that seems to be melting away by this point,” pointed out Celestia, noticing how Tirek’s grin became a snarl. “He seems to be getting quite frustrated with his opponent.”

“After so long of simply obliterating his opponents, I can understand how actual competition could be a bit jarring,” said Discord. “Give Tirek Crimson a moment to slip back into his groove, and I guarantee you that he will put on a show that you will not soon forget!”

Tirek slammed his palms to the mat before slowly pushing himself to his feet. Mac kept up his same stony expression, even as Tirek beamed contempt. He was very calm, even as Tirek rushed him for a third time. He wrapped his arms around Mac’s middle, trapping his arms at his side and squeezing the air out of his lungs. Mac stomped firmly on Tirek’s foot, breaking the hold and allowing Mac to slip in a bear hug of his own.

“Bear hug onto Tirek from Big Macintosh, the nearly seven-footer,” commented Celestia. “Those massive arms just squeezing the life out of Crimson, while Spike cheers on his partner from the sidelines.”

Spike slapped the apron, shouting words of encouragement and advice from ringside. If Mac heard him, he didn’t show it. He wrestled much like how he spoke: calmly, calculatingly, and slowly. He seemed content to keep his bear hug in all night, if it weren’t for Tirek pushing them forward and into the ropes. With Big Mac’s back touching what is technically considered outside of the legal area, the hold had to be broken by the referee’s five-count.

Mac released the hold, holding his arms up so that Tirek could back away and the match could resume. Instead, Tirek sent a haymaker at Mac, catching him in the jaw. Tirek saw his opening and took it; he grabbed Mac by the throat with both hands and, to the amazement of the viewing audience, managed to raise Mac up and slam him down onto the mat.

“Incredible double-handed chokeslam!” exclaimed Discord. “That’s gotta be it! Crimson, with the pin!”

One! Two!

Mac managed to, however barely, bring his shoulder from the mat. Tirek’s eyes went wide in shock, refusing to believe that Mac had kicked out. Infuriated, Tirek got a running start and leapt onto Mac with a body splash that would crush a lesser man like a soda can. He dropped down for a pin, only to have Mac kick out at two yet again. Tirek punched the mat in frustration before he rose to a vertical base. Most of his previous matches had ended after just a few power moves. Mac was taking everything he could dish out, and Tirek was running out of ways to put his opponent away.

“Big Macintosh kicks out yet again, and it seems Tirek can hardly believe it,” said Celestia. “The resiliency of Big Mac is incredible! It’s been a long time since anyone has gone this long with Tirek.”

Mac pushed himself to all fours, only to feel one of Tirek’s massive, size-18 boots connect with his ribs. Mac struggled to rise again, this time dropping back down because of a well-placed punch to the head. He pushed himself to his knees, and, having learned from his mistakes, shoved the approaching, attacking Tirek away to create some much-needed separation. He managed to return to his full height, and an opportunity presented itself. When he shoved Tirek, he had stumbled and lost his balance a bit. As he recovered, Mac shot out a lightning-quick knockout right hook. Tirek went limp, falling back against the ropes.

Tirek bounced off of the ropes and ran forward, raising his foot to deliver a massive big boot to Mac’s chest. Tirek fell onto his opponent, hooking the leg for the pin.

One! Two! Three!

“The winner, TIREK CRIMSON!”

Tirek stood up and roared, raising his fists above his head in victory. Spike stared in horror at his friend, who seemed to be knocked out. He slid into the ring to check on Mac’s safety, which proved to be a mistake. As soon as he was within the ropes, Tirek grabbed him around the throat, raised him above his head and slammed him to the mat.

“That’s uncalled for,” complained Celestia. “Someone, please, get Spike and Mac out of here! This continued beatdown is just unnecessary!”

Fortunately for Celestia, intervention was also unnecessary, as Tirek let out one last roar before climbing over the top rope and heading for the locker room.

A creeping, slithering harmony rose throughout the arena, a spooky marriage of strings and vocals that combined to make a truly unsettling tune. That melody gave way to electrifying riffs and heavy beats and low, almost faint lyrics.

There's no holding me back...

I'm not driven by fear, I'm just driven by anger…

Aria Blaze made her way down the ramp, a confident smirk planted firmly on her face and her title resting comfortably around her waist. As far as she was concerned, this match was as good as won. She’d beaten Luna Regal in the middle of the ring not more than two days prior. She said that she would beat Luna, pin her after a straightjacket suplex, and that was exactly what happened. And, just as she said before, she would force Luna to submit and become Intercontinental Champion, and nobody could stop her. Not Trixie Lulamoon, not Adagio Dazzle, and definitely not the champion herself. Aria carried this confidence with her all the way down the ramp and into the ring, where she waited for her opponent to arrive.

There’s a Nightmare inside!

The Intercontinental Champion carried herself with a much different energy than she did on Ascension. She moved like a woman possessed, wearing a ferocious snarl as she prowled down the ramp. She leapt onto the apron, leaning her top half over the rope and letting out an animalistic shout at her opponent. Luna infected the entire building with this strange, primal energy that everybody could feel, but nobody could explain. When she removed her belt from her waist, she clutched it like a child for a moment, then carefully handed it to the referee.

“The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the EWF Intercontinental Championship! Introducing first, the challenger: from The Black Sea, weighing in at 165 pounds, ARIA BLAZE!”

Aria tried to ignore the cascading of boos as she raised her fist above her head. It didn’t matter what the crowd thought now. They’d have no choice but to cheer her once she became Intercontinental Champion.

“And her opponent: from Canterlot City, weighing in at 195 pounds, she is the current EWF Intercontinental Champion, The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

Luna dropped to all fours, slapping the mat like a madwoman, then let out a soul-splitting roar. The crowd returned her energy in full force, bringing the arena to its feet as the referee showed each competitor what it was they were fighting for, then rang the bell.

“The match has begun, and it seems like Luna is tapping into ‘The Nightmare’, that special place she goes to pick up a challenging win,” said Celestia. “If you thought she was a brutal, savage brawler before… Well, you’re in for a treat.”

Aria began strafing her opponent, testingly reaching for Luna. The Intercontinental Champion made no attempt to do the same, simply raising her fists up to her face. Aria went in for the takedown and met a quick jab, followed by a hook that sent her stumbling back. Aria recovered quickly, then went for another takedown. This time, she was a bit more successful, managing to bring Luna down to a bended knee before The Nightmare drove a firm elbow into Aria’s neck. Luna shoved her back a step, then caught her challenger with a fierce uppercut that laid her out on her back. Luna leapt onto Aria and pounded her face with a series of right hands, then dropped for a cover, getting a meager one count before Aria kicked out.

“Luna’s brutality is going to be nothing if not an advantage for her tonight,” noted Discord. “Normally, she would need to keep the referee’s count in mind. But, tonight, she can beat Aria’s face into mincemeat, knowing that a disqualification will still result in her retention of the Intercontinental title.”

“Conversely, Aria Blaze needs to keep her infamously short temper in tact, for the very same reason,” agreed Celestia. “Luna has the Champion’s Advantage. However, I don’t think it’ll come to that. Luna is an honorable combatant, who wants nothing more than a good, clean, challenging fight.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure. Luna has already lost once to the Siren Submission Specialist. I wonder if she’d be willing to risk it.”

Luna grabbed Aria by the hair and dragged her to her feet, occasionally peppering her ribs with a firm punch. Aria pushed the champion away, then swept out Luna’s legs from beneath her with a quick kick. She dropped a knee onto her ankle, then another, and another, before Luna managed to kick her away. Luna scurried to her feet and ran at Aria, who ducked under the incoming clothesline. Aria dropped into a sort of baseball slide, kicking Luna’s legs out yet again.

“Aria Blaze, simply refusing to allow Luna to establish a vertical base,” said Discord. “And she’s focusing on that right leg, which says to me that she wants an ankle lock, just as she said on Ascension this past Friday.” He chuckled as Aria returned her focus to the right leg of the Intercontinental Champion, which basically confirmed his point. “What a blow that would be to your sister, if she were forced to tap out?”

“I believe that my sister is an honorable enough competitor to admit her defeat,” said Celestia. “If Aria Blaze manages to fairly defeat Luna and claim the IC title for herself, then I doubt that Luna would have anything to feel slighted about.”

Currently, the only thing that Luna felt slighted about was the pain in her ankle, which was doing an incredible job of keeping her grounded. Aria continued her systematic dismantling of the champion, bringing down knees, elbows, and boots onto the affected knee. Aria was simply ripping Luna apart.

Luna struggled to defend herself, every feeble swing at her opponent dodged, endured, or otherwise ignored. She knew, at this rate, she'd be parting with her title far earlier than she'd have liked. If she wanted to win, she would need to push the pain out of her mind and persevere.

Meanwhile, Aria was feeling quite confident in the match. She felt wholly in her element, downright relishing the destruction she was dishing out. She smirked, then mockingly dropped to all fours and let out a beastly roar in mimicry of her opponent. The crowd rained down boos, though that didn't seem to bother the challenger. She turned her back to Luna, which was a massive mistake.

“Look at the athleticism of the champion! Beautiful kip-up!” cheered Celestia, as Luna boosted herself with her hands and leapt up to her feet. “Aria Blaze has made a grave error, and that error was turning her back on the Intercontinental Champion.”

Luna stood gingerly, not able to put her full weight on her worked right leg, and waited patiently for her opponent to turn. When Aria had finally had her fill of the crowd’s displeasure, she returned to her opponent, walking directly into a devastating big boot from the champion. Both competitors hit the mat, Aria from being flattened by Luna and Luna herself from using her injured right leg for her prior attack.

“And Regal able to change the complexion of the match with that big boot, a good use of that size and power advantage of hers,” noted Discord. Luna clutched at her ankle for a bit, needing a moment to recover after delivering her big boot. “But, unfortunately, she seems to be favoring that dominant right leg of hers, which could set her back quite a bit, perhaps even negate any advantage she might have.”

Luna pounded on her leg, as if to override the pain she was currently in, then slowly pushed herself to her feet. The crowd cheered, chanted her name, and roared at her, which gave Luna the same sort of energy she usually infected her fans with. The pain was almost an afterthought to the champion by this point. All she was focused on at the moment was retaining her title and making the crowd that was currently cheering her name happy.

Luna grabbed Aria’s legs, crossed the ankle into the back of the knee, and flipped Aria onto her stomach. From there, Luna simply inserted her foot into the little triangle made by Aria’s legs and, being sure to keep Aria’s free foot trapped with her knee, leaned back and grabbed Aria under the chin, locking in her signature Tantabus submission.

“It’s only a matter of time now!” declared Celestia. “Luna’s got that Tantabus secured, in the middle of the ring! How could Aria not tap out?”

“Because Aria Blaze is a technical genius! She can, and will, find a way to escape!” promised Discord.

That didn’t seem likely at the moment, as Luna still had the Tantabus locked in as tightly as humanly possible. It was obvious that Aria was in a lot of pain, the way she twisted up her face and flailed wildly for the ropes. Her hand hovered over the mat, threatening to tap out and give Luna the victory. Luna sensed this, like blood in the water, and doubled her efforts on wrenching Aria’s head and neck area. Aria had to use every bit of resolve in her to refrain from giving up and, in her desperation, she made a mad grab for Luna’s face in an attempt at hitting her hard enough to break the grip. Instead, she clawed the Intercontinental Champion in the eyes, which still had the desired effect.

Aria scuttled to her feet and seized her opportunity. She grabbed Luna’s foot, planted her knee in the small of Luna’s back, and twisted the foot. Luna howled in pain while Aria beamed out sheer intensity as she held her Ankle Lock in with the intent of crushing her opponents joint.

“Just like she said!” cheered Discord. “This makes for twice that Aria Blaze did exactly what she said she would! She said she’d pin Luna after the straightjacket suplex on Ascension and she did! She said she’d make Luna tap out with the Ankle Lock for the title, and it’s happening before our very eyes!”

Now, you’re under our spell…

Oh-whoa-oh, oh-whoa-oh

As the mesmerising, enchanting tune of the Dazzlings’ theme floated out into the arena, Aria rolled her eyes and released the submission hold she had locked in. She waited, tapping her foot impatiently, as Adagio Dazzle slowly made her way down to the ring. Aria slid under the bottom rope to meet with her tag team partner, clearly not pleased with her presence.

“What in the world is Adagio Dazzle doing here?” demanded Celestia. “If she does anything to ruin this incredible match, I hesitate to imagine what Luna will do when she finally gets her hands on her.”

Adagio simply looked at her partner expectantly, waiting for Aria to relent. At first, the Siren Submission Specialist stood her ground, glaring at Adagio with extreme ferocity. After it became clear that Adagio wasn’t going anywhere, Aria sighed.

“Fine,” she said. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Adagio nodded, then, bafflingly, punched Aria as hard as she could in the face. The referee was confused, but had no choice but to call for the bell.

“The winner of this match, by disqualification, Aria Blaze! However… Still the EWF Intercontinental Champion, The Nightmare, LUNA REGAL!”

Aria massaged her jaw gingerly, then pushed Adagio firmly. The Dazzling Leader didn’t seem to mind, most of her attention focused on the still injured Luna Regal in the ring. A dastardly grin spread across her face as she pointed to the ring. Aria matched her grin, then ran with her into the ring. The two Tag Champions rained down stomps onto Luna, who could do little more than endure the onslaught. On Aria’s orders, Adagio dragged Luna to her feet and delivered a stiff punch to the jaw. Luna stumbled back directly into Aria’s grasp, which allowed her to cross Luna’s arms at the wrist. Adagio backed up and got a running start, then swung a fierce European uppercut into Luna’s jaw; simultaneously, Aria flung Luna back into a crashing straightjacket german suplex.

“Disgusting! Somebody, somewhere, stop this!” demanded Celestia. “Those two might seriously hurt Luna!”

Aria and Adagio had apparently had their fill of violence, and slid out of the ring. Aria retrieved her Tag Team Championship and slung it over her shoulder. She walked up the ramp with her partner, a grin securely on her face. Luna might have lost by way of unfair DQ, but Aria didn’t care. As far as she was concerned, a win was a win, and she now had two wins over the current Intercontinental Champion.

That belt would be her’s eventually. She just knew it.

“The following contest is a Three Stages of Hell Match! This match is held under Best of Three rules, and the winner will be the first competitor to score two wins over their opponent. The first fall is a standard contest, in which a win can be scored via pinfall, submission, count-out, and disqualification! The second fall is an Extreme Rules Match, in which there is no disqualification, and the only way to score a win is via pinfall or submission! And, in the event of a draw, the third fall will be a Last Man Standing match, in which the only way to score a win is to incapacitate your opponent so that they cannot answer to the referee’s count of ten!”

The cold, harsh, industrial beats of Scootaloo’s theme shook the foundations of the arena, bringing with it Scootaloo herself. She brought with her that trusty steel bat of hers, no doubt intending to use it at some point during the second fall of the match. She slid into the ring with a determined glare present on her face.

“Introducing first, from Cloudsdale, weighing in at 130 pounds, SCOOTALOO!”

Scootaloo swung her bat into the top rope, clearly ready to crack Diamond’s head clean open. She wouldn’t have to wait much longer, as the regal fanfare of Diamond Tiara’s theme began to play. Down the ramp came Diamond Tiara, bringing with her a baseball bat of her own. Unlike Scootaloo’s bat, which was pitch-black steel, Diamond Tiara’s was golden and encrusted in diamonds. Diamond Tiara slid into the ring, pointing her bedazzled weapon threateningly at her opponent.

“And her opponent, from Ponyville, weighing in at 135 pounds, who would like to be announced as The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling, DIAMOND TIARA!”

It was obvious that the two wanted to get at each other, but they managed to keep their hands down for the time being. Twilight Sparkle had been very clear that they were to keep their conflict within the confines of the bells, and neither of them thought it would be a good idea to anger her again. The two set down their weapons in their respective corners, strafing one another as the bell rang.

“These two came armed for combat in this Three Stages of Hell match, a very rare match type here in the EWF,” noted Celestia. “But, as I’m sure I don’t need to remind you, using one of those baseball bats at this juncture in the match would result in a disqualification. Both Diamond Tiara and Scootaloo need to keep a cool head, lest they put themselves at a disadvantage early on in this match.”

“And, once again, Regal, your ignorance to the industry is showing,” scoffed Discord. “Sacrificing a win in the first round is a viable strategy to put yourself in a much more favorable position come the second fall. You’d know that if you ever stepped foot between those ropes without a microphone in your hand!”

“And, remind me, how many wrestling matches have you been a part of?”

“I’ll have you know, I’m a three time Mayhem Chaos Bedlam Wrestling Television Champion! Could’ve gone for the World title if it weren’t for my bad knee…”

“As farfetched as I find that, I’m afraid I don’t have a chance to check the MCBW records, because we’ve got a match in progress as we speak!”

Scootaloo was the first to act, sending a testing jab at Diamond. Diamond leaned back to avoid it, trying to strategize and decide how she’d take control of the match. Scootaloo would have the speed advantage, due to her smaller frame, and Diamond knew that her very minor size advantage wouldn’t help much in this particular match up. So, with a disadvantage in speed and no clear advantage in strength, The Hottest Young Star in Wrestling would need to use her smarts in order to beat her opponent.

Scootaloo shot out another three punches, only the last of which actually managed to connect with Diamond Tiara’s jaw, though the damage was minimal. Diamond watched her opponent carefully, looking for some sort of opening. Scootaloo sent out another jab, at which point Diamond’s opening presented itself.

Diamond slipped under Scootaloo’s punch, grabbed her around the middle and brought them both to the ground. Scootaloo pushed Diamond away and hurried to her feet, only to be taken down by a sudden heel kick from Diamond Tiara. Scootaloo hit the mat and Diamond descended onto her, raining down hard rights and lefts. This quick burst of offense was short-lived, as Scootaloo managed to slip a headbutt in, which created some much-needed separation. The two made their way to their feet, staring one another down with fury and ferocity.

Scootaloo went high and Diamond went low; Diamond swept out Scootaloo’s leg, which dropped her to her butt, and delivered a swift kick to the chest. As Scootaloo struggled to return breath to her lungs, Diamond dropped on top of her for the pin.

One! Two!

Scootaloo brought her shoulder up in the nick of time, which clearly frustrated the self-proclaimed Crown Jewel of the EWF. Diamond grabbed Scootaloo around the throat and squeezed with all her might, which made breathing next to impossible for Scootaloo.

“Diamond showing her violent streak here,” said Discord. “She really isn’t very fond of Scootaloo, is she?”

Diamond Tiara had a five-count before she was disqualified, and she was determined to use every single last second of it. She didn’t remove her hands until the referee made it to four, and she replaced her blatant chokehold with brutal, savage elbows to the head. Diamond made another attempt at a pin, scoring another near-fall in the process. Diamond slapped the mat in frustration, throwing a mini temper-tantrum at her inability to pin Scootaloo.

“And she’s also showing her childish side,” noted Celestia as Diamond stood up and stomped her feet angrily. “It’s simply shameful. A competitor of that magnitude, on a stage as grand as this one, should be carrying themselves with more grace and dignity than that of a toddler!”

Discord surely would’ve retorted, were it not for the explosive pop from the crowd when Scootaloo grabbed Diamond by the tights and rolled her up for the pin.

“Schoolboy pin!” cheered Celestia.

One! Two! Three!

“The winner of the first fall: Scootaloo!”

As soon as Diamond Tiara understood what had happened, she just about blew her gasket. She descended onto Scootaloo with fire and fury, getting her fists on every possible inch of Scootaloo’s face. The referee had to pull her away for the customary grace period between falls, in which both competitors needed to be at least three feet from one another before the next fall could commence. During this time, Diamond Tiara stomped over to her corner and grabbed her golden, diamond-encrusted baseball bat. As soon as the referee was out of her way, Diamond brought her bat down onto Scootaloo’s ribs again and again, filling the air with the sickening sound of steel against flesh.

“See, Regal? Diamond Tiara knew that there’s a way to lose the first fall, but put yourself in a favorable position in the second fall,” said Discord. “And that’s exactly what she did. What the uninitiated and ignorant, like yourself, would call a loss, those who know what they’re doing would call master strategy!”

“And, I presume that part of Diamond Tiara’s ‘master strategy’ is to throw a fit because she lost?” asked Celestia.

“It doesn’t especially surprise me that you saw it like that.”

Diamond cracked Scootaloo in the ribs one last time before sliding out of the ring and flipping up the apron in search of a weapon. She emerged from beneath the ring with a large wooden table and a dastardly grin in tow. She slid the table under the bottom rope and followed it into the ring, then stood up and set the table to stand near the corner. She went to return to her opponent, stepping into a flurry of jabs and hooks from Scootaloo. Apparently blessed with a second wind, she gave Diamond Tiara all she had, swinging like her life depended on it. Diamond Tiara made an attempt at a counter-attack with a right hook, but Scootaloo managed to catch the fist in the air. Scootaloo laced their fingers together, which formed a tight grip, and leapt onto the table behind them. Scootaloo jumped off, spinning around Diamond and bringing her down into a savage Tornado DDT

“Scootaloo borrowing a bit from her indie comrade with that incredible Tornado DDT!” called Celestia. “Sweetie Belle’s La Fin is a simply fantastic maneuver, and Scootaloo used it with the finesse and skill that one would expect from Sweetie herself.”

“If I’m being perfectly honest, that was far more expertly executed than what I would have expected from Scootaloo,” admitted Discord. “She’s a very scrappy little lady, so to see her pull off something even as relatively simple as a DDT of that nature with that level of skill and precision is, simply put, impressive.”

Scootaloo surely could have at least attempted to pin Diamond by this point, but she chose not to. This match was clearly less about a victory and more about her revenge, and this showed when Scootaloo strode over to her baseball bat, grabbed it, and brought it down onto Diamond’s middle. Though weeks had passed, Diamond Tiara was still rather sore in the midsection, and Scootaloo knew this. As such, she decided she would work Diamond’s body until something broke: the bat or her ribs.

Diamond caught one of the mad swings and yanked the bat from Scootaloo’s grasp, tossing it out of the ring. Scootaloo kicked Diamond in the side, which sent her rolling out of the ring in agony. As she recovered, clutching her surely-bruised ribs gingerly, Scootaloo was making plans in the ring. She stood on the far side of the ring, watching her opponent as she rose to her feet roughly three yards away. As soon as Diamond was nearing her full height outside of the ring, Scootaloo ran forward and leapt through the ropes like a heat-seeking missile.

Unfortunately for her, Diamond Tiara had the move well-scouted, and sidestepped out of the way to avoid the brunt of the attack. Scootaloo crashed head-first into the guardrail, which knocked her silly. Diamond Tiara grinned, then grabbed her opponent by the hair and tossed her into the ring. She took her sweet time getting between the ropes herself, which gave Scootaloo plenty of time to roll out the other side and hit the ground outside of the ring with a thud. Diamond rolled her eyes and crossed the ring, leaned through the ropes, and grabbed Scootaloo by the hair again.

Diamond Tiara wasn’t entirely sure what hit her, nor was she certain of how Scootaloo had gotten her hands on it. In fact, Diamond wasn’t really sure of anything that was going on. All she knew with absolute certainty was that she was out on her back and the thing that had hit her, whatever it was, hurt a whole hell of a lot.

Scootaloo pulled herself to the apron, holding the broken frame of the acoustic guitar that she had pulled from beneath the ring and broke over Diamond’s head. With Diamond on her back, Scootaloo saw her opportunity; She scaled the turnbuckle nearest the table, eying her opponent in the center of the ring.

“Scootaloo risking it all here!” called Celestia. “Is she thinking Swanton Bomb? I think she must be!”

Scootaloo spread her arms wide and took a deep breath, then leapt and flipped through the air. The crowd cheered as she dived, though their excitement was extremely short-lived. Much like Scootaloo’s suicide dive, Diamond had the Swanton scouted and managed, though barely, to roll out of the way. Scootaloo hit the ground with a thudding crash, and the crowd responded with near-unanimous boos as Diamond slowly, tiredly dropped her arm over Scootaloo’s chest in an exhausted, barely-legitimate pin.

One! Two! Three!

“The winner of the second fall: Diamond Tiara!”

“That ring-presence of Diamond Tiara!” Discord clapped his hands as he spoke, clearly pleased with what was occurring. “We’ve got a level playing field once again! All Diamond has to do now is keep Scootaloo down for ten measly seconds, and she can finally put this nonsense behind her!”

Diamond rolled over onto her back, her hand clutching her head gingerly. She slowly sat up, trying to put together the next phase of her plan. The guitar shot had rattled her brain, and it was difficult to form a coherent plan, but she was up to the task. Her eyes fell on the table that she had set up earlier, still yet to be used, and a plan began to form itself in her mind. She stood up, watching as Scootaloo struggled to do the same beside her. The referee slipped between them, keeping them at arm’s length just long enough to ensure that they could both continue. When that was proven to be the case, he could do nothing but step out of the way.

Scootaloo ran forward, catching Diamond with hard, fierce right hands that stunned the Wrestling Princess. Diamond traded in a shot of her own, but was immediately overwhelmed by the speed, ferocity, and unpredictability of Scootaloo’s hits. Diamond snuck in a boot to the gut, then grabbed Scootaloo into a front facelock. She dragged her over to the corner and hoisted Scootaloo straight up for a vertical suplex. Scootaloo wriggled free, flipping back and landing on the table. She hopped from the table to the turnbuckle, then turned for some offense of her own.

Quicker than Scootaloo could’ve ever prepared for, Diamond hopped to the middle rope, springboarded up, and grabbed her around the neck, bringing Scootaloo crashing through the table with Girl’s Best Friend.

“GBF! GBF through the table!” exclaimed Discord. “Diamond connects with that absolutely devastating springboard avalanche cutter of hers, through a table no less! Scootaloo’s not getting up from that one!”

Diamond stood up, hoping with all of her heart that her gamble had paid off. If Scootaloo got up from that, Diamond was officially out of ideas. She grinned as the referee began his slow, careful count to ten, during which Scootaloo didn’t so much as twitch on the mat.

Eight! Nine! Ten!

“The winner of the third fall, and the match: DIAMOND TIARA!”

Diamond held her fists above her head to jeers and boos from the crowd, not caring in the slightest. She had won, and that’s all that she cared about. She grabbed her golden baseball bat and, being sure to step on Scootaloo’s fingers as she went, Diamond Tiara rolled under the bottom rope to return to the locker.

“An incredible match to be sure, and Diamond Tiara proved herself to be the better woman this time,” said Celestia. “Hopefully, this will be the end of this violent feud, and these two gifted competitors can move on to bigger and better things.”

“I can’t speak for Scootaloo, but I have it on good authority that Diamond Tiara is already chasing further pursuits,” said Discord. “My sources tell me that she’s got a meeting with some very important people on Monday.”

“Of course she does… In any case, it’s almost time for our main event! Trixie’s Sovereignty, Ember Torch and Nationals Champion Starlight Glimmer versus Pinkamena Pie and a mystery partner! That’s next…”

To the crowd’s confusion and annoyance, the theme that played was a classy, regal piano theme, the song of the Monday Night Magic General Manager. However, it was not Trixie who came walking down the ramp, but Ember Torch and the EWF Nationals Champion Starlight Glimmer. The two moved with purpose, sliding into the ring as if every single person in the entire arena was beneath them.

“The following contest is a tag-team match, scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, representing The Sovereignty, at a combined weight of 284 pounds, the team of EMBER TORCH AND THE EWF NATIONALS CHAMPION, STARLIGHT GLIMMER!”

The two new-found friends touched gloves, grinning to one another in anticipation of the match. Starlight pulled off her championship belt and passed it to the approaching timekeeper, swiping up the two microphones he was bringing to her. She passed one to Ember, then cleared her throat to speak. The boos came down like hail, making it almost impossible to hear what Starlight had to say.

“You can boo us if you want. You can whine and complain and bitch and moan all you want, if that’s what it takes for you to be able to sleep tonight,” said Starlight. “Just know that it will change nothing. The Ultimate Opportunity will still be gone. Trixie Lulamoon will still be the EWF World Champion. And Pinkamena Pie, that joke that you all put your faith in, she will still be a failure.”

“And that’s why we’re out here tonight,” said Ember. “We’ve got nothing to prove for ourselves. Everybody knows that we’re better than Pie. No, we’re out here to prove to you people that you bet on the wrong horse. You put your allegiances in the wrong people. There was a time that you all were oh so loyal to Trixie, and you turned your back on her. We’re here to show you what happens when you go against The Showstoppers.”

More was likely to have been said, were it not for the sudden flare of an accordion, which resulted in a massive pop from the crowd. Pinkie Pie skipped onto the ramp, holding a microphone of her own. Her smile had returned in full force, but it had a layer of determination and confidence behind it that made it clear that, smiling or not, Pinkie Pie meant business.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” said Pinkie. “You were talking, and I cut you off, and that’s super-duper rude, but you guys are also super-duper boring, so…” She shrugged. “Can ya really blame me?”

“It’s all fun and games with you, isn’t it? That’s why you’ll never make it in this business,” spat Starlight. “All you care about is joking around and making these people smile, and your ring work reflects that.”

“All your moments, every time you make the crowd pop and go ‘wow’, they don’t amount to anything,” added Ember. “Because you’re not, never have been, and never will be championship material!”

To The Sovereignty’s massive annoyance, Pinkie started to laugh. It wasn’t just a chuckle, either. She descended into a hearty belly-laugh for nearly a full minute before she regained enough composure to speak again.

“Oh, man, if you thought I was gonna beat you up before, you guys are in for a ride after saying something like that!” laughed Pinkie, wiping a tear from her eye. “But you’re right. I do try really hard to make these wonderful people here go ‘wow’. That’s the whole point of this, isn’t it?” Pinkie looked around at the crowd for confirmation, which they gave in the form of a blanketing cheer. “But, if it makes you feel any better, I won’t try to make the crowd go ‘wow’ tonight. No, no, no, tonight, I’m gonna have them say something more like…” Pinkie Pie pointed to the top of the ramp, a devious grin spread across her face.

O! M! G!

The crowd erupted as the bubbly pop tune of Sonata Dusk blared throughout the arena. Sonata herself cartwheeled down the ramp, stopping next to her tag partner with a grin to match Pinkie’s. The two hugged, then ran down and slid into the ring, standing toe to toe with the new faction known as The Sovereignty. Sonata patted Pinkie on the back with a smile, then slipped between the ropes and stood at their corner. For The Sovereignty, it was decided that Ember would start the match, and Starlight exited the ring. This left the match to The Dragon Lord and The Outrageous One to start.

The bell rang, and Pinkie barreled forward, taking Ember down with a shoulder block. She grabbed Ember up, hoisted her over the shoulder, and drove her into the corner were Sonata waited. Pinkie brought her shoulder savagely into Ember’s gut three times before she tagged her partner in. Sonata hopped over the top rope, to a cascade of cheers, and quickly went about lighting Ember’s midsection up with a flurry of kicks. She backflipped away, only to run forward and plant a knee across the jaw of Ember Torch.

“Sonata Dusk is turning this match on its head,” said Celestia. “That quick-paced, acrobatic offense seems to be more than Ember Torch was ready for tonight, something I’m sure she has in common with the entirety of the EWF Universe.”

“To be honest, I thought Pie’s tag team partner would be her imaginary friend or something,” said Discord. “For her to get a Tag Team Champion… Well, it’s a strategy far better than I would expect from the likes of Pie, to say the least.”

Sonata tagged Pinkie into the match, who quickly slid between the ropes and bashed her head against Ember’s. Pinkie grabbed Ember by the wrist and tossed her into the corner, sending Ember crashing into the turnbuckle where her partner was waiting. Starlight slapped Ember on the back, the blind tag completely missed by Pinkie, who was still focused on Ember. Pinkie ran forward and jumped, crushing Ember against the turnbuckle. Pinkie pushed Ember to the ground and went for a pin, completely oblivious to the fact that Starlight was currently the legal competitor.

Starlight snuck into the ring to get the drop on Pinkie; She ran and brought a knee into the side of Pinkie’s head, then dropped down into a chinlock, her goal to wear down the explosive, energetic Pinkie Pie.

“While Pie is busy wrestling with her head, Starlight Glimmer is wrestling with her head,” said Discord. “The brilliance of her strategy cannot be overstated. Pinkamena Pie thrives on momentum, quick burst of offense, and rushes of adrenaline. What Starlight is doing here, by adopting this slow, methodical approach, is wearing down her opponent. Drains her of her energy, making it harder for Pie to escape future pinning predicaments, and it sets up for Ember’s deadly Bloodstone Dragon Sleeper. All in all, it’s a perfect plan.”

“Sure enough, it sounds perfect on paper,” agreed Celestia. “Though I wonder how Sonata’s presence might throw a wrench in Starlight Glimmer’s plans.”

Pinkie struggled in the hold, knowing full and well that every second she wasted was pushing the match more and more in Sovereignty’s favor, and Pinkie refused to let them outsmart her twice. She clawed her way forward, dragging both her and Starlight towards the rope. Outstandingly, she managed to grab the bottom rope, which began the referee’s five-count for the break. Starlight used every last second before she released her grasp.

Pinkie massaged her neck gingerly, any attempt at a counterattack gone by the time Starlight grabbed her leg and started dragging her away. Starlight pulled Pinkie to the corner and tagged in her partner; Ember slid into the ring and dropped a knee onto the back of Pinkie’s neck. Ember rolled Pinkie onto her back and grabbed her in an inverted facelock. She hefted Pinkie up and stretched her over her knee, hooking the arm to complete the Bloodstone Dragon Sleeper.

“Ember Torch with that Bloodstone Sleeper, nice and tight, and as far away from Sonata as humanly possible!” said Discord. “The Sovereignty are a very new team, but they’ve got instant chemistry and tag team instincts. The way they cut the ring in half, to keep Pinkie isolated from her partner, it’s tag team brilliance!”

Pinkie could feel her lights start to go out, her brain begging for oxygen due to the Bloodstone Dragon Sleeper. Her arms couldn’t reach the ropes, nor did she have the angle or position to get any meaningful punches in on Ember to break the hold. That meant Pinkie had to do what it was she did best: improvise offense.

Pinkie swung her right foot up high, catching Ember square in the face. The hold broken, Pinkie slipped out and wrapped her arm beneath Ember’s jaw. Using what must have been the last of her energy, she ran forward, jumped to the ropes and springboarded off, flipping over Ember and driving her head to the mat with a shiranui.

“Taco Tuesday!” called Celestia, her voice lost in the sea of cheers. “Pinkie, backed into a corner, had to take a page out of Sonata’s playbook, and laid both her and Ember Torch out for the count!”

Pinkie, still mostly unconscious, crawled forward to her partner, desperately in need of a tag. She followed the sound of Sonata’s rhythmic clapping, slowly pulled herself closer and closer to her partner, while Ember did the same on the other side of the ring. Pinkie dove for the tag, making contact with Sonata at the precise moment that Ember managed to reach Starlight. The two fresh competitors rushed into the ring, coming to blow near the center.

Sonata got the upper hand, going downstairs and taking Starlight’s legs out with a baseball slide. She hopped to her feet as Starlight pushed herself to her knees, administering a swift kick to the side of the head. The kick stunned Starlight, which opened her up for a flurry of alternating high-step kicks. She spun on her heel, knocking Starlight flat on her back and causing the crowd to explode into cheers.

Sonata approached Pinkie’s corner, grinning while she did. With her friend’s encouragement, she scaled the turnbuckle, her sights set on Starlight’s prone body. Starlight was square in the middle of the ring, making this one of the more difficult leaps she had ever attempted. Sonata steeled her nerves and jumped, flipping backward in the air. She landed firmly, midsection-to-midsection, in a picture-perfect shooting star press.

Sonata clutched her middle, staring down at her opponent. Instead of going for the pin, she pulled herself up, made her way to her partner, and tagged her in. Pinkie grinned, and, after thanking Sonata, slipped into the ring. She ran forward and jumped into the air, driving her back into Starlight’s ribs.

“Senton from Pie!” called Discord. “And the pin!”

One! Two! Three!

The bell rang, bringing with it a cascade of cheers from the audience. Pinkie leapt to her feet, fists raised above her head triumphantly. She ran to her corner, hooked her arms around Sonata, and hoisted her into the ring. The two hugged, basking in the glow of their victory.

“The winner, the team of SONATA DUSK AND PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!”

Pinkie lifted Sonata up in her hug, parading her around the ring like a trophy. Sonata grinned just as wide as Pinkie, wishing her own team would treat her like this. When she wrestled alongside Aria and Adagio, it seemed so business-like, not to mention unnecessarily mean. With Pinkie, though, Sonata had fun in the ring.

The crowd’s cheers morphed to boos, and Pinkie suddenly dropped Sonata, pushing her to the side. Ember, clutching with her the Nationals Championship with the intent of bashing Pinkie in the head, missed entirely and hit nothing but empty air. She turned for another attack, and ran right into a headbutt from Pinkie. The Outrageous Pie brought a boot to her gut, bent her at the waist, and slipped Ember’s legs between her legs.

Meanwhile, Starlight was just coming to, and saw her partner in peril. She hurried to her feet as quickly as she could, hoping to take Pinkie down with a cheap shot from behind. Unfortunately for her, Sonata was ready, and caught The Equalizer with a spin kick to the midsection. Sonata hooked her arm under Starlight’s jaw. Pinkie looked back and grinned, then flipped forward and drove Ember’s head into the mat with an Equestrian Destroyer; simultaneously, Sonata ran and used the ropes to springboard over Starlight, smashing her head into the mat with her Taco Tuesday shiranui.

“This may be the first time these two stood together in the ring,” said Celestia. “But those stereo finishers should be ample evidence that these two could be a force to be reckoned with.”

“Need I remind you, Regal, that Dusk is currently a Tag Team champion with two women who she calls her sisters?” said Discord. “Would you have her toss them to the curb for a shiny new toy?”

“Of course not, Discord, I’m simply making an observation. One day, Sonata may not be able to count on the Dazzlings to be there for her. On that day, she could have many worse allies in her corner than Pinkamena Diane Pie,” said Celestia. “Speaking of allies, I don’t know how happy Trixie Lulamoon will be with her allies come Monday, after this defeat.”

“We’ll have to tune in Monday to find out. Ladies and gentlemen, as always, this has been Discord Redrum and Celestia Regal, thanking you for joining us for EWF DisHarmony, and wishing you a good night!”

Author's Notes:

Hey, thanks for making it through this story so far. For those of you who don't know, this is gonna be the last chapter for quite some time. But worry not, fellow fans of pro-wrestling, I'll be working 'round the clock to get the next month of EWF out as quickly as possible. Until then, sit tight, relax, and start taking your bets on how Twilight is going to clean up this whole World Title debacle.