Once we arrived at the decision to accompany Cadance on her mission, Princess Celestia invited all of us to spend the night at the castle. I was excited, and I could see Mia and James were as well. The three of us hadn't planned such an event, and it was pleasantly surprising.

Celestia herself was different than I had expected. Previously I'd only seen her in stiff, formal capacity, where she had heavy presence and gravity. But, as she chatted cheerfully with Cadance and led us down the halls, I realized she was just as humorous and friendly behind the scenes as she was grand and imposing in public.

"So, do you guys want some dinner? I am famished," she said over her shoulder, breaking my reverie.

"Huh? What? Oh. Oh! I'm sorry! I mean, yes ma'am, we haven't eaten in hours," I replied, stumbling out of my train of thought.

"You should address royalty with more formality," Cadance chided sharply.

My heart froze at her tone. "I, uh..."

Cadance interrupted me, her voice stern and harsh. "Prithee madam, insomuch as mine companions and myself desire such sustenance as your grace wilt bestow upon us, ah, we be hungry give us some damn food or something? I don't know what the hay I'm saying," she finished, still in her snooty "rich pony" voice.

Celestia rolled her eyes, and Cadance's cheeks puffed out, then she burst into a raucous laugh. "Bwahahaha! I'm sorry, but the look on your face was priceless, like you'd just bitten into a dog-turd pie."

Celestia narrowed her eyes and gently bopped Cadance on the head. "Be nice, you! And that is absolutely disgusting." She then looked back at me. "You can relax a bit, you know. I promise I won't throw you in the dungeon if you do."

"The dungeon!" Mia hissed in my ear, walking up close beside me. "I've been a bad girl. Tie me up and punish me!"

"Stop!" I whined.

"Make me. Spank my ass."

"Oh my gosh. Princess Celestia is like right there, she'll hear you!"

"Hear what?" Celestia asked curiously, flicking an ear towards me.

"N-nothing, just discussing, ah, stuff, with my people," I answered uncomfortably.

"See? She heard you, not me," Mia whispered again, sticking her tongue out at me. "Everything was fine until you got all uptight, Miss Goody Twosho-, er, fourshoes?"

"What! I'm not uptight!" I growled. "I'm even dressed like you!"

"Yes you are. You're so scared somepony might hear me saying sexual things!"

"Mia, stop!"

"Hey Eris. Sex. SEX. SEEEXXXX!"

"STOP!"

Celestia halted on a dime, and I plowed into her creamy royal butt, face first. I froze in absolute horror, tangled up in her gorgeous, flowing tail. Slowly, I inched my gaze up, dreading what I would see when our eyes met.

I needn't have worried. She looked back at me mildly. "Are you okay down there? You needed me to stop for some reason?"

I crawled backwards, carefully extricating myself from her beautifully shimmering rump-rainbow. "I, uh, I-I-I," I stuttered, then just shut my mouth and tried again. "I'm so sorry! I didn't-"

"It's my fault, ma'am!" Mia interrupted. "I distracted her too much."

Celestia stared at us both, then chuckled. "I see. Try not to injure yourselves before you even depart, please? You were fortunate this time, I am relatively well cushioned back there. But if you had walked into a stone pillar or some such unforgiving object, I fear this conversation may have taken a very different turn."

Still snickering, she turned away, swishing her magnificent tail across my face and leaving me blushing hotly with embarrassment.

"That is a great privilege few have enjoyed," Cadance added haughtily, prancing back and forth in front of me with her neck held high. "Plastering one's face into the royal rear? Unheard of! Consider thyself f-f-fortunate! Hahaha!" She busted out laughing again, and this time Celestia had difficulty containing herself as well. I could hear her giggling from behind her hoof, and saw her taking furtive glances in my direction, her eyes filled with friendly mirth. I was glad she wasn't angry with me for putting my muzzle where it didn't belong, but I think my cheeks would have fried eggs nonetheless.

Mia slipped up against me and put an arm around my shoulders. "That reminded me of how we met. Just your pretty face and my butt..."

"I really SHOULD spank you or something," I grumbled, while still allowing her to hug me. "I can't believe this. I put my face into Princess Celestia's ass. How am I gonna live that down? I'm so humiliated!"

"You'll be fine. Who wouldn't want your face in their ass?"

I rolled my eyes. "You're impossible." I looked back at the princesses, shaking my head.

"And it hasn't been THAT long," I heard Celestia saying to Cadance under her breath.

"Hello, Princess of Love here," Cadance replied trollishly, thumping her chest with a golden hoof. "You can't fool me, you old prude."

"I am NOT a prude!" Celestia huffed. "I'll have you know I am actually VERY open minded. Why just the other day I-" she caught herself, and drew in a deep breath. "Nice try, Princess Cadance. Clever. You almost got me that time."

Cadance scowled. "One day I'll learn your dirty secrets, Princess Celestia. Mark my words."

"You are welcome to keep trying."

"Oh, I shall."

A small beep sounded from Celestia's purse. "Sorry, just a moment."

I watched with no small relief while Celestia paused to deal with something on her tablet, lifting the thin device in front of her face and tapping rapidly on it with a hoof. It's fortunate that human-made touch devices are sensitive to Equestrian close-range telekinetics. We can type almost as fast as humans on them. Sometimes it's difficult to see what you're pressing when your fingers are an invisible magic field, though. It's a lot easier on an actual keyboard where one uses tactile feedback to find the right letter keys.

I sat watching Celestia type and Cadance figuratively twiddle her thumbs, grateful that my recent humiliating faux pas seemed to have become a thing of the past already.

"When we met, I liked your face in my butt, Eris," Mia giggled eventually, dragging me right back into it.

"You've got a tight butt," I said without thinking.

"You've both got tight butts," James interjected cheerfully and much too loudly.

"My butt isn't the only thing that's tight," Mia giggled wickedly.

I gasped. "Mia! James! Stop!"

"It's true though," Cadance beamed. "You've all got tight butts. All three of you." She winked at James.

"Why thank you, ma'am," James grinned. "I do a lot of squats."

"It shows."

"Oh my gosh, all three of you stop," I hissed. "Ma'am," I added as an afterthought.

Cadance snorted at my use of the word, but didn't reply.

"Okay, all done," Celestia said abruptly, starting forward again. "Follow me please, the dining room is just ahead."

She walked towards a large double door and opened it with her magic. We followed in a gaggle, passing into an impressive room with decorations I ignored in favor of the table containing multiple steaming trays of food, which interested me greatly.

As we approached the dinner table, I heard the door open again behind us, and another regal voice rang out. "Good evening, sister!"

I swung my head around, taking in the sight of a familiar blue night-shift Alicorn.

Celestia smiled. "Good eveni-"

"Princess Luna!" Mia gasped, interrupting Celestia, who eyeballed her quizzically.

Mia blanched and her hands went over her mouth. "Oh no. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to talk over you!"

Celestia stared her silently for a moment, then chuckled. "This is an exciting time for you, I can tell."

Cadance abruptly reared up, reached out a hoof, and patted Mia's head. "She is quite thrilled to be here," she explained, stroking down to her shoulders. "She can barely contain herself." Cadance squeezed up between Mia and James, and her hooves slipped casually down to their asses.

Mia flinched and squeaked in surprise, but relaxed when she realized it was Cadance who had just put hooves all over her.

Celestia shook her head good-naturedly. "I can tell. It's rather adorable." Either not noticing or ignoring Mia's immediate blush, she then smiled at Luna. "Please join us for dinner?" she continued.

Luna approached, and looked Mia up and down, taking in her skirt, heels, and tight fitting top. She nodded her head in approval. "Truly, this one does have good taste in clothing. I would much enjoy duplicating her style."

"I, ah, would be happy to help with that," Mia said distractedly, her eyes locked on Cadance.

I noticed the pink Alicorn in question was still casually draped between my humans. She was nonchalantly squeezing both their asses in a way I could easily see from my position slightly behind them, but Celestia and Luna could not.

"I've never been this close to humans before today," Cadance purred cheerfully, her eyes wide and guileless, both her forehooves crushed eagerly against their firm butts. I could see she was really going to town with her close-range telekinesis, invisible fingers squashing their rear ends like a baker kneading dough.

"What do you think of it so far?" James asked her. "The proximity, I mean."

"It's really a fascinating experience," Cadance replied thoughtfully, rubbing his ass in a circular motion.

"Oh I'm sure it is," I agreed stiffly, rolling my eyes at her.

"Definitely." She smiled sweetly at me, her face a mask of pure childlike innocence while her sneaky forehoof slipped up under Mia's tiny skirt from behind, exposing her white panties.

Mia's eyes grew wide as the Alicorn groped her through the thin fabric. "P-princess Cadance," she gasped, leaning her head back against her shameless molester. "Oh my goodness. I-ah, I don't think I need another autograph just yet."

Celestia and Luna, who still couldn't see anything unusual from their position in front of us, looked at each other in confusion. "What?"

"An inside joke between friends," I replied smoothly, shooting the naughty pink Alicorn a fierce glare. "One which I fear would require too much time and effort for our dear Princess Cadance to explain just now." I was a bit surprised at the venom in my own voice.

Cadance hurriedly pulled her hoof back out from under Mia's skirt, carefully avoiding eye contact with me. "Well then. Dinner, was it?" She released James and Mia, regret drawn plainly on her face as she slipped back to the floor.

I turned towards the table, distracted despite my increasingly foul mood at the mention of food. "It smells really good."

"It IS really good," Luna commented, raising her fork. I had no idea how she sat down so fast, but I wasn't about to let her get much farther ahead in the eating race.

We quickly took seats, James and Mia sitting next to me and Cadance plopping down across from us.

I eyeballed the serving trays with rapt interest. "Is that lasagna?" I asked.

"It's pasta night," Celestia said from the head of the table. "It's modest, I know, but it's a weeknight. The banquet room is quite a bit more impressive."

"No, this is fantastic," I exclaimed. "Thank you for having us."

Celestia nodded. "Ring the bell if you need anything extra. Oh, and don't forget to try the manicotti."

"Manicotti?" James's eyes widened. "I love manicotti!"

"Here." Cadance levitated the tray to him, holding it while he scooped out a large amount of the cheesy, saucy pasta. She offered it to Mia next, then me.

"I've got it, thanks," I said, taking the tray in my own magic. It smelled amazing, and I felt myself salivating as I shoveled some out onto my plate.

"Salad?" Luna asked.

"Thanks!"

"Eggplant parmesan?"

"Ohhh!"

By the time I was done with the passing trays, I had a considerable quantity on my plate. There was relative silence for a few minutes while we dug in.

"So," James asked eventually as our eating slowed. "How are we going to get there?"

"You'll be travelling by airship out of the Canterlot skyport," Celestia explained, taking a drink from her magically held glass.

"Airship?"

"A dirigible. We don't really have fixed-wing aircraft like your world does, much less quadcopters."

"Well I'm a bit surprised. Can we bring all our stuff?"

"The airship has a high cargo capacity. You could even bring a few vehicles."

"I guess we'll take the SUV then?" James said, turning it into a question directed at me.

"Yeah, let's do it," I agreed. "Might come in handy."

"Take whatever you need." Celestia patted her mouth daintily with a napkin. "Just try to go easy on the weapons. We don't want to give the idea we are arming a revolution or something, and I don't want to give them a lot of hardware to use against us if things reach an... unfortunate conclusion."

This sobering thought dampened my spirits for a bit, and it seemed the others were thoughtful too.

Mia broke the uncomfortable silence. "Hey, is that a human-made stereo? Can I use it?" She pointed at a rather imposing set of speakers and equipment on a DJ platform raised high above the floor on the other end of the room.

"Of course you may," Celestia nodded. "It was a gift from Jeff- ah, I mean, Mr. Peterson."

"Jeffrey Peterson? The owner of ProteC?" James asked.

"Yes. We sort of saved the world together. Two worlds. Maybe more, I don't know." Celestia sounded a little wistful. "He's given me quite a few things since then. He comes to dinner and such, sometimes."

"I see. I've never met him, myself. I'm just a small guy on the totem pole. I wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for Er- er, Miss Sky, our boss lady." He gestured at me, and I gave a weak smile.

"Find local device... link output..." Mia muttered, tapping menus on her holobracelet. "How about Imagine Dragons," she said.

"Who?" Luna asked. "I'm still learning my Earthside musicians. Have you heard Moby? I like Moby."

"Moby is good," Mia agreed, absently. "Ah. There we go. Have some "Thunder!" She made a swiping motion across her holomenu towards the large sound system.

The indicator lights glowed to life, and the song boosted and boomed out. The Sony stereo was expensive and professional-quality, large speakers on either side of a holoprojector capable of presenting video or expansive ambient effects, which it was doing now. Essentially the far end of the dining room turned into a dance floor, complete with lasers and floating holographic objects.

"I like this song," Cadance smiled, closing her eyes and bobbing her head to the beat. "I wanna dance."

"You are more than welcome to do so," Luna urged. "It would be entertaining."

"Okay. Try not to laugh though." She slid out of her chair and moved to the empty space on the floor.

"Wait up," Mia called out, following her. "I'll come with you." She trotted up beside Cadance, the holograms providing shimmering illumination to the pair as they tapped and pranced next to each other.

"Damn, they're pretty good," James observed.

"I didn't know Mia could dance," I said, feeling a small pang of jealousy at the fun those two were having.

"Can you?"

I snorted. "Don't be ridiculous. Have you seen me walk? I faceplant on flat ground for no reason whatsoever."

"You're not so bad-hey, what are they doing?"

I looked back at Mia and Cadance. Mia had gotten up under the tall platform and was gripping one of the chromed support poles. I wasn't sure what she was doing at first, then she gave a kick and my breath caught in my throat.

Oh my gosh. She's practically levitating. That's incredible.

"Mia can pole dance," I gasped, once I regained control of my hanging mouth and blinked my eyes back into their sockets.

Mia spun around, twirling like a fairy on a spring breeze, her skirt covering very little of her long outstretched legs.

"She makes it look so easy," James said. "I didn't know she could do that."

"I didn't realize she was so strong," I marvelled, watching her invert on the pole, her thighs clamped on it above her head. Her skirt fell up over her waist, exposing every inch of her underwear, and my other thoughts simply scrambled in my mind as sudden pleasant heat wormed its way through my stomach. To say i was enjoying the show would be to put it mildly.

James put an arm around me, and I squeezed my legs together, trying to curb the growing desire to squirm around in my chair.

Mia did things I hadn't ever seen before, which is to be expected since I haven't spent much time in the places where such things were popular. I wanted to see more, her streaming pink hair, curved hips, and lithe movements combining to inspire a storm of desire inside me. I wanted to watch forever, but all too soon the song ended, and Mia landed lightly on her heels alongside Cadance, who immediately gave her a hug. It didn't even look like she was breathing hard.

"Wow," I sighed. "So beautiful. I wish I could do that."

Motion from the head of the table caught my eye, and I suddenly remembered to be worried about what Luna and Celestia would think after witnessing Mia's highly provocative display. I braced for their displeasure, but then they both lifted their forehooves and began clopping them together vigorously. I joined in, relieved. Maybe I'm a little bit paranoid after all.

Celestia had provided us with four rooms, two on each side of a long hallway in one of the castle's wings before she headed to bed. Of course myself, James, and Mia were all hanging out in one of them as soon as she left.

And Cadance.

Her presence was becoming increasingly annoying to me. Mia and James seemed to be very happy with her, which annoyed me even further.

As expected, the conversation had already turned to sex again. Her cute little laugh and mannerisms were charming, adorable, and making me sick.

I tried to hold my feelings in, because she WAS a nice pony. She was friendly and funny and just always right there making everyone laugh and smile, which didn't help my growing irritability.

"What would your husband say?" I finally asked as she sat in James's lap, my voice having the slightest edge to it despite my efforts to control it. "How does he feel about how you act?'

Cadance cocked her head at me, blinking. "Shining Armor? He wouldn't mind at all. See, we love each other very much, and he knows I would never leave him for anypony. He doesn't mind if I, ah, have a little fun. In fact, he likes to see it."

"And you feel the same?"

Cadance shrugged. "I like to watch, in case you hadn't noticed. I don't mind anything he does, because no matter what, I know he'll always come home to me. I mean, if he's not like doing stuff in front of me in our home already. Like, in our bed or something. Like, sometimes he-"

"Okay I think we get the picture," I said quickly, stopping her.

"I could have listened a bit longer," James grumbled crossly, shooting me a glare.

"Sorry," I said in a tone that had absolutely no regret in it whatsoever. "But we have business to attend to, and it's difficult when certain people keep getting sidetracked." I stared pointedly at Cadance.

Cadance looked at me questioningly for a moment, then her eyes widened and her mouth made a little silent "oh" shape. "Um, may I talk to you for a moment?" she asked me nervously. "In private?" She climbed down off of James and moved beside me.

"I-I suppose so, ah, ma'am," I replied stiltedly. I turned to James and Mia. "I guess we'll be back in a moment, then."

Mia looked at the two of us worriedly. "Is something wrong?"

"Uh, boss stuff," I replied quickly. I could see neither of them fully believed me, but Mia didn't ask any more questions as she rested her head on James's shoulder.

"Okay. We'll be here," she said quietly.

I walked with Cadance into the other room, and she shut the door behind us. "Eris? May I call you that?"

I sat stiffly on the floor and folded my forelegs across my chest. "Call me whatever you want, Princess Cadance."

She looked at me, and for the first time I saw genuine regret in her eyes. "Eris, I'm sorry. For how I've been behaving. It wasn't right."

I just stared at her, letting her continue.

"I didn't mean to make you jealous. I'm too free with my hooves. I should have realized-"

"No, wait," I protested. "That's, uh, actually, not really..." I trailed off, unfolding my forelegs and running a hoof through my mane. "It's not you playing with my friends... oh crap, this is hard to explain."

She just looked at me. "You're not jealous? I mean, I figured maybe you think I'm trying to steal your lovers. I swear I'm not, I'm happily married."

I sighed. "Well, okay, maybe a LITTLE, but to be honest about that..." I leaned towards her a little. "Being a little jealous, ah, it's not entirely unpleasant. It was making me a bit, um, excited, to be honest."

A slow smile spread accross her face. "Hmm. So, maybe you know how I feel when I watch Shining Armor pounding another mare with his big, hard-"

"It's because I don't feel you're taking this seriously enough," I blurted, cutting her off.

"What?"

"We're going with you into potential danger, right? You know how you just rescued us from that hive? I'm still upset about what happened. I don't even like being this far away from Mia right now. I know she's safe here, but my heart doesn't. I'm still terrified of l-l-losing..." Oh how I hated myself at that moment, I started fucking crying right there in front of the Princess of the Crystal Empire. The perfect humiliation icing for the crap cake I'd made of the evening.

She gaped at me while I blubbered softly, not wanting my darlings to hear me falling apart in the other room. Tears and snot ran down my face, dripping from my nose, and then suddenly Cadance was all around me. She put her forehooves around my shoulders, and unfolded her wings, snuggling me in a feathery cocoon. "There, there," she cooed. "It's okay. You'll be okay."

"I'm s-s-sorry," I choked. "I'm still messed up. It was a really b-b-bad day."

"It's fine. You're strong, and you saved her."

"A-actually, you saved all of us when I failed," I sobbed. "I shouldn't doubt you. But I just felt s-so frustrated watching you joke around. It made me feel like something bad might happen. I got angry at you."

"I'm sorry," Cadance breathed. "I didn't realize-"

"It's not your fault. It's mine. I'm sorry for being an asshole to you."

"You're fine."

"It'll be okay, right? I mean, you do take it seriously, right?"

"I-"

"N-no, don't answer, it's a stupid question," I interrupted her. "I'm s-sorry. I'm being so rude."

"No, you're not. I'm an Alicorn, Eris. I'm strong. I won't let anything bad happen to you or your friends, especially since I let you guys come along. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to any of you. I'd die first."

"I believe you," I sniffled, my waterworks slowly drying up. I did believe her. Pervy or not, I knew she was a kind, strong girl, and I trusted her. I also felt like a genuine turd for getting mad at the pony who'd saved my life only hours before. "I'm sorry for, for... whatever I did. Doubting you. I don't know. I'm sorry for being such an asshole."

"It's okay. Really, I like you, and your friends. I'm glad you... shared this with me."

I buried my face in her soft chest. "If you have sex with them, I won't be angry," I mumbled.

"If we did, it would just be play," she said, softly, stroking my mane. "I know you really love them. It's like the way I love my husband. It's different from simple sex. I'd die for him in a heartbeat, and he'd do the same for me."

I sighed, enjoying her comforting warmth. "Yeah. And he still doesn't mind watching you ride some other cock."

"Fetishes don't always make sense," Cadance giggled.

"So true," I giggled too, thinking of some of the things I'd done with Mia and James.

"And I don't like just cock," Cadance whispered, suddenly kissing me on top of my muzzle.

"Oh dear," I said, blushing again. "Uh, I'm, ah, uh," I mumbled. "Oh my."

She began to release me from my warm, comfy safety zone. "Just something to think about," she winked, pulling back her forehooves and wings.

"I'm not into mares," I said, lacking conviction as I continued to press against her fluffy chest.

She gently pushed me off her body, folding her lovely wings behind her.

I sighed. "Ah. Hello, cruel world. Oh how I've missed you, cold floor."

"Well, maybe I can wrap you up again sometime," she suggested, eyes twinkling. "But your friends are waiting for you right now, you should probably get back to them before they start to wonder what I'm doing to you in here with the door closed."

I saluted. "Yes, ma'am."

"Ugh! Stop that!"

We both giggled.